#38 Fear as a Teacher

#38 Fear as a teacher
[Speaker 1]
Welcome to Different Points, episode 38. Today's topic is fear as a teacher. So, Roy, what is fear teaching from your point of view?

[Speaker 2]
I could go down two pathways with this. One, following up on what we said in the last episode, the fear of what they were trying to push on us, and the teaching lesson was understanding that it was all orchestrated and the dangers of anything that they're trying to make us take. So that was fair as a teacher.

And then if I go down the other road, I think of in school when you had a teacher and they instilled fear to us and made us stand up and just were just nasty and that kind of thing. You know, I definitely think a lot of people, especially with my speaking podcast, have been damaged for years based on that, you know, afraid of public speaking and things like that. But then it can be a lesson as well that you realise it further on going, hey, I can actually do anything.

And the reason I was afraid is because somebody with authority pushed me down when I was a child. So when you say fear as a teacher, they're the two things that come to mind.

[Speaker 1]
Thank you. Yeah. And it's such a shame that so many people have had that experience.

I had a friend who, when she was at school, I think it was quite, you know, an expensive private school. So you'd expect that the teachers would be, you know, a bit better maybe. And they used to do this sort of dancing, free movement dancing class thing.

And my friend, the teacher, said, you're a little heifer lump, meaning clumsy. And so what you're going to do is play the piano while everyone else dances. And the rest of her life, she was terrified about being seen dancing.

She could only dance when she'd had some alcohol. And the weird thing was, she actually could dance. There was nothing wrong with it.

But it really hampered her in that way. And a lot of people have that with things like dancing is a very good example of it. But as you said, with speaking, and also things like sharing feelings, you know, you can't share your feelings.

Because if you do, you're going to be mocked. You're going to be I mean, mockery is a very, very big, very damaging piece of society over here in the UK, where children at school will mock each other, adults will mock each other. And it's supposed to be lighthearted humor.

But actually, it can be vicious. And if the person reacts, the person says, I was only joking. Don't you have any sense of humor?

You're a bit thin skinned. But actually, you were being mean. You were not being, you know, warmly funny, you're being mean.

And that can actually create fear in somebody, fear of being vulnerable and open. And that can really interfere with relationships, having courage in life. And then I was talking to someone else, again, one of my guests, he's a singer songwriter.

And he grew up, his father was in comedy and actually produced a lot of comedy for the TV in the UK, very talented man. And then and this guy said to me, he grew up in a household where everybody was creative. And everyone was doing what they wanted to do.

So when he wanted to become a singer songwriter, it was well, yeah, great, do it. There was no, oh, much better if you started as a doctor, that's much safer. Or don't you think you should, you know, do an MBA?

No, he went off and became a singer songwriter. And then he was faced with the way to make money with that is to make songs about pain and heartache. And he could have followed that out of the fear of not succeeding.

No, I'm gonna make songs about joy and loving life, because that's what I believe in. And everyone loves him. And he's got this beautiful energy, lovely wife, gorgeous new child, you know, because he wasn't driven by fear.

But I'll say something else that we mentioned the COVID years before, I had no fear during the COVID years, because I was never frightened of dying from an illness. I was brought up in a natural health environment. We had no vaccinations to me, there was no fear, except for one 24 hour period, when I was in absolute terror for 24 hours, it began and ended at 24 hours.

And I knew that that was not my fear. I knew that was the fear of the collective consciousness. And I knew, I'd been made to feel that fear for 24 hours, so that I could empathize with what they were going through.

So it was a teacher, I had to have that experience to have compassion for other people. And it was a really important lesson. It was a horrible, horrible experience.

But it was a very, very important teacher in that moment. So now I see fear as when I hit fear, I see that as a milestone that I'm moving, that I'm growing. I've got a different relationship with fear, because of having had experiences of actually facing into it.

[Speaker 2]
So Yeah, I love that. Beautiful. And just going back on the kind of teachers and stuff like that, my story was, I had a history teacher, I was 13.

So it was just after going into secondary school. And it wasn't that I wasn't studying because I would, but he'd make you learn pages and pages every day. And then he'd ask you questions, and he'd just scream at you.

So for some reason, the exam, I'd just done terrible, came last in class, I got 17%. And in front of 30 odd people, and this is a school that our leader, who's in charge of the country went to, so it's a decent school. And he became the principal of this person for four years, not so long ago.

And he basically said, my grandmother would do better. And she's been dead for 10 years in front of the class. So that was my kind of, and then three years later, I got a different teacher, and I got 100% in every exam, and an A in the state exam at the end of the year.

So it just shows how some person can just go.

[Speaker 1]
Yeah. Well, how great as well that you then got a much better teacher and did well. I'm delighted to hear that.

And of course, that teacher's probably dead now, so I don't need to go back.

[Speaker 2]
No, he's not. He's not. And I remember seeing him in a shop in Malwanda.

And like, I did a reunion recently, and I thought it was just me. And I had a conversation with a few people, they all hated him. One guy, he told them he was going to amount to nothing.

And the same guy has major trouble with drugs and everything. Like, this guy has destroyed so many people. And it's like, the lesson here is to make sure you find out what your teachers are saying, and nip it in the bud straight away, and report them, and get them out.

Because you can't just assume they're good, because there's teachers that, I mean, I had both sides, like I said, so be very careful with who, you know, your child is learning from.

[Speaker 1]
That's right. And I suppose the other thing from that is that if someone is terrorising you, making you really, really afraid, to not just assume that you have to take it, that you can, you know, you can look and go, hold on, is this person actually being a bully? And do they need confronting?

Which is what you're saying. And we can say that our whole lives, you know, at any point, it's very difficult to do sometimes, particularly if you've been brutalised like you were then. But we can we can undo that past damage, can't we, by confronting things in our lives now, we can help to heal our past.

So, you know, if you are being terrorised by somebody now, or if you've got memories of being terrorised by somebody, you can actually up-level how you're manifesting, how you're working in your current life, and not let anyone do that to you now. And that will actually help you to heal the wounds that are left over from the awful things that may have happened, as you've just mentioned, Roy. So thank you so much, everyone, for watching and listening.

That was a little bit of a meaty, intense topic, that one. So have a lovely day with no fear at all, unless it's created fear. Tell your friends about the show.

Don't be afraid to come back and listen tomorrow. And take care.

[Speaker 2]
Take care.