Consent is more than just getting a “yes,” especially in a new connection or relationship. That’s where the FRIES model comes in: 💚 Freely Given 💚 Reversible 💚 Informed 💚 Enthusiastic 💚 Specific And if you don’t think clearly communicating consent can be super steamy and hot??? You need to…
Communication can be difficult. Especially when you’re not great at reading social cues, or when you really, really want one specific answer from someone. So what happens when someone is on the fence, and you’re leaning super far in one direction? 🤔 If you push toward the answer you want,…
Not everything that looks like a boundary actually is one. Sometimes people use the language of boundaries to coerce, control someone else’s behavior, make demands, or apply pressure…all while insisting they’re just “communicating their needs.” On the latest episode of @DoAsWeSayPod, @DrLizPowell and @DrNerdLove are talking about the TikTok…
Have you heard about the infamous TikTok Voice Memo Guy? In this episode of Do As We Say, Not As They Did, Harris O’Malley and Dr. Liz Powell fill you in on all the details, some questionable twists, and their thoughts on how weird it is to schedule getting laid…
If nothing has inherent meaning, why not choose joy, kindness, love, or connection? That’s the whole idea behind optimistic nihilism. Instead of saying, “Nothing matters, so why bother?” try saying, “Nothing comes with meaning, so I get to create a life that feels meaningful.” On the latest episode of the…
Are you actually getting mixed signals… or are you just hoping they’ll eventually become what you want them to be? 😬 When we really want someone to choose us, it’s easy to turn something totally ambivalent into a yes. It’s easy to read the tea leaves and get the answer…
This week on @DoAsWeSayPod, we’re bringing you two messy Reddit stories that might just have more in common than you might think. First, @DrLizPowell, @DrNerdLove, and Evita Sawyers, look at a poster in r/TrueOffMyChest. A son realizes his parents are in an open relationship, that might actually just be cheating.…
Trying to get a $1 relationship while only investing 15 cents isn’t the best way to approach a relationship. (And it won’t save you from pain or conflict either.) It’s scary to be vulnerable, to ask for what you need, or risk disappointment. But if your strategy is to always…
If it’s not an enthusiastic, consistent yes, it’s a NO. 🚨 Yeah, rejection and unrequited feelings suck. But continuing to chase someone who’s already told you who they are or how they feel isn’t going to end how you want. In fact, you might just be turning that person into…
We’ve said it before, we’re saying it now, and we’ll say it again: DON'T GO THROUGH YOUR PARTNER’S PHONE! This week on @DoAsWeSayPod, @DrLizPowell and @DrNerdLove are joined by Jessica Daylover of @RemodeledLove for some truly eyebrow-raising dating stories from r/PolyAdvice. We all have private thoughts and feelings, even in…
The internet is great because you can find your people. But it also kind of sucks because those people might live thousands of miles away. And no matter how immaculate your group chat is, you still need some kind of community with the people who actually live around you. The…
How do you react when people tell you things you wish you’d never heard? In this episode of @DoAsWeSayPod, @DrNerdLove and @DrLizPowell are joined by Evita Sawyers for a conversation about emotional responsibility, connection, desire, and what happens when people treat others like solutions instead of human beings. First, they…
Have you ever gone looking for evidence that your worst fear was true, all so you could feel even worse than before? 😬 Sometimes we’re so desperate for certainty that we’ll end up being our own worst enemy. We keep poking around until something sticks. On this week’s episode of…
Why is it easier to go on a romantic date than schedule and follow through with that friendship date? Well, it might just come down to the fact that humans love instant gratification. Dating comes with obvious dopamine hits. Friendship? You might “just” have a great conversation…and then you have…
Can you imagine how exhausting it would be to meet every single one of your partner’s needs? When would you even have time to meet your own? 😬 Look, polyamory isn’t for everyone, and that’s totally valid. But if you are polyamorous, you might need to learn that your partner…
Have you ever set yourself up to get hurt, but you just couldn’t help yourself? In this episode of @DoAsWeSayPod, @DrLizPowell and @DrNerdLove are joined by the brilliant Jessica Daylover. Polyamorous since 2013, co-author of “Polyamory & Parenthood,” and founder of @RemodeledLove and the Nuclear Fusion Network, Jessica brings all…
Remember Mystery? The pickup artist from the early 2000s who taught awkward men how to attract women? Well, he’s back in the headlines. 👀 This time, it’s because he wrote a book with (and about) his AI girlfriend. So you already know that @DrLizPowell, @DrNerdLove, and @polyrolemodels7265 had some thoughts.…
Control doesn’t always come from a mustache-twirling villain who laughs at your misery. Sometimes it looks like victimhood and comes from someone who feels so out of control that they create impossible rules and constantly shifting goalposts to avoid getting hurt. That doesn’t mean they’re a villain, but it does…
Friends don’t let friends date AI chatbots. They sit you down and ask if you’re okay…or they lovingly roast you first and ask questions second. 🙌 In the latest episode of @DoAsWeSayPod, @DrLizPowell, @DrNerdLove, and @polyrolemodels7265 debate what they’d do if a friend announced they wanted to bring their AI…
A good relationship has friction occasionally. That doesn’t mean you’re walking on eggshells 24/7, constantly trying to avoid upsetting your partner, or somehow upsetting them without ever understanding what you did. If every disagreement leaves you thinking, “Wait, how is this my fault?” it’s worth paying attention. 👀 Fortunately, on…
Is it better to be in a relationship where you’re constantly contorting yourself to avoid saying “no,” or one where your partner can’t say “no” at all? Trick question. The answer is neither. In this episode of @DoAsWeSayPod, @DrNerdLove and @DrLizPowell are joined by author, educator, and longtime member of…
Sure, ChatGPT can write your dating profile, but then who’s going on the date… You or the robot? 🤖 The goal of your dating profile shouldn’t be to appear like a perfectly optimized human being who can do no wrong, has no faults, and always knows what to say, because…
Swipe right. Swipe left. Swipe, swipe, swipe. You can end up with 3 matches or 300, but guess what? Matches alone don’t get you dates, relationships, love, or intimacy. A match is an introduction. You still have to start the conversation, build a connection, and eventually meet in person. In…
It’s hard to feel safe with a stranger, and without safety, desire is basically non-existent. And you don’t have to race toward the finish line. In fact, sometimes letting that tension build is even hotter than trying to make everything happen in one night. 🥵 In the latest episode of…