Lucy the Lunatic (and Redd Foxx)

0:08 Welcome to my weekly panic Attack. I'm your host, Remy Brooks. I've been a licensed psychotherapist for over twenty years and run a thriving private practice. I'm also diagnosed s BI polar an OCD. Often the two do not mix well, which tends to throw my life into complete chaos. So as I do some spiraling, my best friend Liz Win will do her best to ground me a bit. During this podcast, we'll be talking about the horror and the humor of the anxieties of daily life, the things we do that are embarrassing, funny, but yet very human. Let's get started, and there's no better way to get started than by beginning this EPISOD episode and all episodes with my friend and co host, the beautiful, intelligent, and ever rational Liz Win. How are you, Liz Dad? How are you today?

1:19 I what's making you anxious? By I'm not gonna go there yet. I had planned to talk about road breach, but as I am learning, plans change. So while I am not comfortable with change in the least, we will get to all of that later. Here's a well adjusted moment from Liz's life. So I'm staying at a hotel in Virginia this week, and I didn't see the sprinklers go off in my room along with the ten others.

2:00 But I gotta start it over again. Sorry, I'm staying in this hotel in Virginia on a work trip, and didn't the sprinklers go off in like half the rooms on my floor? Of course, I didn't get back to the hotel room to witness the massive flooding until eleven o'clock at night, when I was exhausted. I just really wanted to collapse. So as exhausted as you were, you of course went downstairs and yelled at every staff person you saw. Did you end up in the ten hols? No, remy, the TV was working and the bed was dry. I just asked for extra tails for the floor. I left a screaming for everybody else. And this has been a well adjusted moment from Liz's life. Do you know what time it is? What time is it? It is time to tell you what the hell I'm stressing out about now, And it's not road rage. I really really thought I was going to share quite the story about road rage.

3:09 But you said to Lucy last week, be good, right, and you're a good girl. I love you so much or the best? Did that not work? No? No, it did not. As a matter of fact, she came up with a plan. She's a dog. How did she do that? Because she's very SmartLess, she's very very smart. The end of our podcast, I opened up the door and Lucy the lunatic, just as I predicted, was laying right outside the door, listening to every single word we talk about. And when I saw her there, I said to her, I said, I praised you every word, every word.

4:08 It was only good things. I knew you were listening. You have to agree only positives, all good. She raised her head, she gave a little nod, and I know what that nod said. It said, just you wait, relation of like his all knives or pointy objects in your house because the dogs ary. That's the thing. Like, I really have to admit. I went to bed that night just a little bit scared. I woke up the next morning to find multiple puddles of piss. Now it's noteworthy to add that Lucy is completely housebroken. She doesn't pay in the house, so this really was completely out of spite. And at first I was angry, right, but then I was sad, Like all She's not a happy dog, and I don't know why. I really you know, she lives a really good life. She goes to doggie daycare and she loves it.

5:32 She has so many doggie friends. She loves her food, she loves her trees. She has so many different bones. She hangs out next to me on the couch and I pet her for hours. She adores my kids and they love her like she is a loved dog. She should be happy. I have no idea why she is not happy. And all I really want is for everybody living under my roof to be as happy as possible, and whatever I can do to make that happen, I will gladly do. But she's not happy. It's Friday night in the garage, which is my thinking place. That's where where, that's where I spend my time because I'm away from I'm away from the kids, and I'm away from Lucy, and that is where I go. I was drinking cup after cup after cup of coffee, smoking cigarette after cigarette after cigarette, and I am thinking, and I'm in there for like hours, and I take a sleeping pill and it hits me as the sleeping pill hits me. Huh, that maybe Lucy needs a

7:04 friend. Maybe I should get my dog a dog? Now? Is that what your mother was? Is that what you were going to say? That's what she did. She got a cat for the cat. Okay, how did that work out? It did work out for her. It did work out for her. Okay, So now you have to care for two animals instead of one. Okay, that that was not There is no part of me that once a second dog. I was not raised in a two dog household. I don't know about two dog households. That was never the plan.

7:46 I do not want a second dog. But Lucy is happiest when she is playing with another dog, and like I said to you, I really want her to become a happy dog. Right. So again, I have taken my sleeping pill. I am on my last cigarette of the night. I might not even be able to finish it. When my phone dings with the notification and I look at my phone it's from the next door app.

8:30 And I mean I can't even really see straight at this point, But my OCD kicks in, and part of my OCD is that I absolutely cannot have any numbers on my phone. All numbers need to be cleared as soon as they pop up numbers, like you can't see the little bob the little dots with the numbers in it right, exactly exactly, So no notification numbers, they can't have it. Like, the only time I go on Facebook is when there's a notification. So I have to get onto Facebook to clear the notification, and in doing so, I see the very first on the homepage, the very first thing that somebody had, you know, that somebody had written up, you know, so like I see nothing past whatever the very first thing is. So anytime somebody like adds me on Facebook, I'm like, just you know, I'm a really bad Facebook friend because I only see the very first thing. I don't scroll, I don't do any of that stuff. I don't know anything about any of that. I don't care.

9:41 What I care about is clearing all of the numbers. So I muster up the little bit of energy that I have left and I open the app simply to clear the number. And it's amazing that I can even read it. But it says the title urgent need immediate help. And it makes me laugh because I am clearly not the audience this person is trying to reach, not immediate help. Maybe tomorrow. No, not ever. I am exactly the one who steps up to offer help to strangers. But but within this message is a picture of a dog. So I continue reading, okay, and who knew? The next town over there's a rescue place, a dog rescue place, okay, and they're expecting a dog tomorrow. And this woman is that this is what that what the whole thing reads. She's at maximum capacity.

11:03 She must find a foster home for this dog immediately. Can anybody help? Now, Liz? Was I not just thinking for hours about getting my dog a dog? Yes? It is perhaps a sign, because I'm very big about signs. I'm also very drugged. So what do I do? Obviously I call her immediately in that state, in that state me, I'm sorry what you say? So there must have been an interesting conversation on her and from what I recall, which by the way, was like through snores and through yawns, I'm like, tell me, didn't you know about this dog? And let me tell you everything about Lucy? And it turns out that it really did not sound like this dog would be a good match for Lucy. But she was a capacity she and it she did have a dog

12:39 within her rescue. That did sound like it would be a good match for Lucy. And she told me everything about this other dog and he sounded wonderful. So I say, half asleep. It's close to two o'clock in the morning at this point, what's his name? And she says pinclincl pencil, And I'm thinking a Christian dog and we're a Jewish household. Maybe I got the signs crossed. Maybe this is actually not meant to be moment after all.

13:35 But Liz, without any prompting what soever, she then says to me, but I've had him for three weeks and I renamed him Red Fox. Do you happen to know who that is? Yeah, yea red Fox from Sanford and sons, Uh yeah, no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no, no, no no no. The dog comes with his own TV theme song, Liz, the signs, the signs, Liz, absolutely get you came with her? So he came with this. Yes, So I say, let's meet for a meet and greet tomorrow. Tomorrow arrives and Lucy sees the woman and begins her so embarrassing, Liz, it's so embarrassing, this ferocious bark. But then she sees that this woman brought a dog. Okay, starking, and Lucy says, a dog, a dog at my helps welcome,

15:05 please come in, says host Is Lucy. And the two of them play hard, and this woman says, well, do you want to try him out? Do you want to see how they get along? And I do, Liz, I do, I really really do? Yes, yes I do. So the woman heads for the door, and Lucy sees that she's about to leave, and Lucy guards that door and she says, um, lady, you seem to have forgotten your dog. Get your dog.

15:52 It was fun having you here and you can come back any time, but get your dog. So the woman suggests that I distract the dogs by going into the other room and offering them treats, which is a great idea. So I grab a handful of treats. Lucy wants some treats. You want treats. You want treats, And you could actually see Lucy's thought process. Your dog, she says, treats, and Lucy runs to me for the treats and eats them all and then runs back to the door. Damn.

16:32 It she missed the woman. So the two dogs were so tired from playing so hard that the rest of the night Read and Lucy they were just songked. I ended up crating Read for the night and bringing Lucy upstairs into my bedroom and we all slept so beautifully. But first thing in the morning, Red started barking, and Lucy looked at me like I forgot there was a dog here, motherfucker. Oh my goodness. So we go downstairs and I let them out and I fed them, and then everybody looks at me like, so, now what let's plan? What is the plan? And I'm like, I don't know. Why don't you two play? And they were like no, And I'm like, what is the plan? Toys? Toys or the plan? So we go when I get the toy box and Lucy is not a toy dog. Toys are so beneath her. She is a bone. Okay, don't get it confused. So Lucy grabs her bone and

18:07 walks away and Read like has never seen so many toys before. He must have been very excited. Oh my god, he was so excited. He had so many to choose from. So he grabs a toy and he sits down on the floor and he starts enjoying this toy. And then Lucy looks to see what he's doing, and she walks over to him, and she takes that toy right out of his mouth and says, this is my toy and one of my favorite toys. She's never ever played with it. You do a child that you can't That's exactly right, she said, you can't have it, and read totally chill, totally chill. He goes back to the toybox. He just picks up a different toy. There were so many.

19:04 He picks up a different toy. It's no problem. Lucy, who's on the other side of the house now with her bone and this toy that she's forcing herself to play with just to make a point, looks and sees that he picked up a different toy. Walk it over. I can't have that. Walks over to him, grabs it from his mouth. This is also a favorite of mine, to not touched it. Grabs it from him, brings it to this stash she's now creating. Okay, she's acting like an only child. Now, that's what it is. That's exactly what it is. I would continue, you know, with this. But I think you're seeing the pattern here, so I can just move on, right, Yeah, So then he forgets about the toys. Eventually, because this continues happening, he moves on. He jumps on the couch, which is where I'm sitting. He lays on top of me and just covers me with kisses.

20:15 Oh, Lucy jumps on the couch and throws him to the floor. The mommy is mine, The mommy is all mine. Stay away from her. Okay, he got it. My youngest is on the other side of the couch. I have so read went to my youngest and cuddled up with him. Lucy walked over, took him by the scruff, and threw him to the floor. The boy is mine, don't you dare? And before I knew it, I was breaking up a leghit dog fight. Oh my god. Blood was not drawn, but they went at it in like a serious way. Now, as a reminder, this was all about trying to make Lucy a your dog, which seems to be backfiring big time, big time. Now. The problem is, and I will deny saying this until the day I die. Uh huh. I like Read much more than I

21:52 like Lucy. I notice that you went down in volume when you said that your friend she's listening, aren't you. I shush, shush, but the knives away, block the door. Um, okay, we're we're going to just move on. Okay, none of what I said matters because this is one hundred percent about Lucy. So I am keeping my fingers across my toes crossed, everything is crossed, hoping that this is going to work out and that read it will become part of this family. And it's interesting because last week, maybe even the week before, I have been talking about how my household has become so chaotic, and yet it is now even more so by my own doing so chaos to your household. I'm doing it myself. It's like I am looking for ways to punish myself, Like, in what way next can I make things worse for myself? But I'm really really hoping that

23:26 this works out and that this, you know, the whole idea of getting my dog a dog, is actually a smart idea and not a really stupid one. So I will keep you updated on how this all turns out. Because I am fostering to adopt. This is not a commitment. He can always go back. This is a trial, pure but I really want to keep him. So we will see how this works out. Maybe after a week or so, she'll just calm down and get, you know, get used to it. I remember when my mother brought my brother home. She you know, when she had given birth to him. I looked at her, my little like two year old self, and saw that she had a bundle and walked away and didn't talk to her for a week. I came frown. I hope, So, I hope I made a good decision, not like the worst decision ever, because now we're all already attached to him.

24:36 He's super sweet. He is lovely. I mean, he is a lovely, lovely dog. So we'll see what happens, all right. I'll keep you updated well, And if anybody else has stories about you know, Okay, Liz's mom got a cat for her cat, so I'm not the only one out there who got a pet for their pet. So if you have stories about getting a pet for your pet, please let us know what happened. Hopefully it turned out well. I want to hear good stories. Please only share good stories. Positive, positive, positive. Well here's positive to you, but I still say lock your door. At night, she sleeps in my room with me. Yeah, alright, she starts off that way, so I don't know. We'll see that. You can reach us at Voyage Media, at Twitter, Instagram, and on Facebook, and you can reach out directly to me at Panicked Renny on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook,