Episodes

Dec. 3, 2022

Is Your Partner a Narcissist?

Is your partner a narcissist? And what are the implications if the answer is "Yes"? Is this term over-used, or under-recognized? What possibilities realistically exist for someone who is in a relationship with a narcissist? J...

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Nov. 20, 2022

Biting The Bullet

You know the feeling; that moment when your spouse asks you to do something that you absolutely, honestly DON'T want to do. But they enjoy it. What do you do? Radical honesty in the direction of "taking care of myself"? Or......

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Nov. 7, 2022

After The Affair

What happens, for a couple, after one partner has had an affair and it is now out in the open? What are the best things you can do (and the worst ones)? How long is the healing process? Is it really true that going through th...

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Oct. 20, 2022

Breadwinning

Talking about money -- and how it affects your relationship -- is one of the hardest things for a couple to do. Without even knowing that we are responding to our family of origin's stories and values we often develop resentm...

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Oct. 10, 2022

When I Need You The Most, You Disappear

Kristy and Jerry explore some of the most challenging types of disconnected moments between couples. How comfortable are men with crying, or big expressions of emotion? Do men run and duck, looking for cover, abandoning spous...

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Sept. 25, 2022

Me Versus Us

We all want time to ourselves. But what about when that seems to conflict directly with connecting relationally to the significant others around us? What then??? Are there ways of maintaining healthy connections while giving ...

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Sept. 11, 2022

When Politics Rips Couples Apart

Jerry & Kristy discuss the growing trend of angry politics ripping couples apart and testing their relationships as the media around them continue to provoke people to ever-rising levels of division. Alternatives are consider...

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Aug. 5, 2022

The One Thing...

Jerry & Kristy ponder the ONE THING we'd love you to MOST GET in the realm of couples' therapy. And -- in preparation for a few weeks off at the end of August -- we have two excellent fake fights and demonstrate how things co...

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June 14, 2022

What (Some) Women Say in Therapy

In our follow-up episode Kristy and Jerry consider what we often here from women in sessions regarding being in a couple/marriage/parenting arrangement. We conclude with a seemingly spontaneous -- and annoying -- fight, showi...

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May 28, 2022

What (Some) Men Say In Therapy

What do (some) men sound like in therapy, to a couples' therapist? What are their initial presenting complaints? Can generalizations safely be made, after hearing the same themes repeated over and over again? Jerry & Kristy c...

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May 11, 2022

The Allure of Other People

Ahhhh...the gentle (or powerful) allure of Other People. They're just....perfect. Aren't they? Wouldn't life be perfect with them? Jerry and Kristy consider the challenges, and illusions, the flashing attraction to others mig...

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May 2, 2022

Codependent Sex

Jerry & Kristy tackle the thorny topic of the intersection of sexual behaviors in relationships as they may reflect basic patterns of codependency. The importance of self-esteem, boundaries and other basics often get lost in ...

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April 5, 2022

Fight, Fix, or Flee?

Kristy and Jerry look at 3 of the typical reactions to conflicts within relationships and wrestle with understanding the limitations of all of them. Can there be a different way? What does that look like and sound like?

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March 18, 2022

Why Do I Keep Throwing Gasoline on the Fire?

Kristy & Jerry look at some ways that our failures to self-soothe and regulate our emotions impact relationships negatively. We illustrate with some tried-and-true roads to failure and then correct them, illustrating how diff...

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Feb. 28, 2022

Porn & Relationships

Is viewing porn good for your relationship? Your sex-lives together? How do couples actually integrate it into their relational lives? Or do they not do that at all? Is there a serious downside to viewing porn? Or are the eff...

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Jan. 23, 2022

Sex

Kristy & Jerry take on the wonderfully volatile, rewarding and challenging topic of sex within relationships. What does sex, in relationships, bring up for us? How do we reconcile our own desires, or lack of desire, for, and ...

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Dec. 11, 2021

What Is A Healthy Relationship Anyway?

Join Jerry and Kristy for the vivid experience of our first fight, with a great deal of perspective, laughter and alternative ways of handling things within a relationship identified.

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Nov. 21, 2021

I Just Happened To Look At His Phone And...

Kristy & Jerry explore the idea of boundaries within relationships and the challenges that are brought to them by the ever-widening presence of technology in our lives. How much privacy should 1/2 of a couple be entitled to? ...

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Oct. 17, 2021

Step-Parenting: A Stranger in a Strange Land

Jerry and Kristy consider the enormous challenges and complexities of one of the least-intuitive constructs humans have invented: The Blended Family. Step-parents, natural parents, step-children and children from the first (o...

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Sept. 20, 2021

Emotional Affairs & Infidelity

What, exactly, constitutes an emotional affair? And is it really cheating? As long as you're not technically having sex isn't it kind of o.k.? And -- once discovered or divulged -- does it always have to signal the end of a m...

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Sept. 4, 2021

Why A Boot Camp Is For You

Jerry & Kristy talk about the weekend Relationship Boot Camps we run and ask the question: Why should you pay attention to THIS workshop? What's in it for you? And...your relationship? Visit https://loveworkrelationships.com/...

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Aug. 25, 2021

Be Right or Be Happy

Jerry & Kristy take a deep dive into one of the most notable of losing strategies that couples regularly deploy: Being Right. Where does this come from? Why do we keep doing it when it fails over and over to get us what we r...

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July 13, 2021

My Divorce Story (Hers)

Kristy talks about her divorce, looking back at some key elements of the past that were believed to be true at the time, but needed to change. The influence of family-of-origin, inherited beliefs about how a woman is supposed...

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July 11, 2021

My Divorce Story (His)

Jerry talks about his divorce, looking back at some key elements of the past that were believed to be true at the time, but needed to change. The influence of family-of-origin, inherited beliefs about how a man is supposed to...

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