#56 How to Get BIG Results (& Still Take Lots of Family Vacations), with Coach Viliami

Hey brother, welcome to the Be The Man podcast.

I'm your host, Greg Denning, and I'm the creator and coach of the Be the Man, Master Class and Tribe.

If you Sir, have not yet taken the Seven day Be the Family Man challenge, I want to invite you to take that starting right away.

Get in there and take that.

I found 25 years of a racist study of peak performing families, especially family men.

And in working with thousands of men across 5 continents, I found again and again and again that the reason we're struggling, our family life isn't quite where it could be yet.

It's because we're missing one.

For more of seven fundamental ingredients to an extraordinary family life and that's what the seven seven day challenges is, is hitting those the seven things.

And they all start with a so it's the seven A's of being a bad a family man.

And if you haven't taken that challenge yet, there's there's a workbook that goes through there.

There's videos that go with it.

You just go through each one and you actually get this on the Be the Man app.

So you just go download the Be the Man app and log in there and it's just right there.

You can grab it.

It's it's super affordable.

It's it's a total game changer because you understand the principles and practices and those seven essential ingredients to being a rock solid, awesome family man.

And creating the extraordinary family life you want.

So go grab that, brother.

All right, let's let's dive in.

Super excited today to talk to Coach V Great, man.

Doing great things, man.

Tons of motivation and inspiration in this episode, so let's dive in.

All right, brother.

Coach V.

We.

We're excited to have you here, man.

I really appreciate you getting up early to get on the show with us here, man.

Excited to learn.

From from you, your experiences, your life and and the coaching you get to do.

But let's start out man.

Give us, give us some of your background.

Tell us your story how you got to where you are.

Yeah, Greg, man, to get up at 6:00 AM Pacific Standard Time to to hang out and connect with a champion like yourself and all that you're doing to impact positively the world, man, that that's easy.

And you know guys like us, there is no day, there is no time.

This is just what we do.

We prioritize and we prioritize according to.

You know, there's money in the transaction, but the wealth is really in the relationships and have an opportunity to be on here with you.

That's easy for you brother.

So, so thank you so much, Greg, and thank you so much for having me.

Really, really pleased.

I do a lot of these, but this is one that I was particularly very interested in because of the pedigree and really what you have accomplished and how you live your life and just not how you do business.

So really.

This is just really a big deal for me to be able to be on here featured and be on here with you.

My name is Billy.

I'll meet the fucked out da bell abatu vai.

I am the oldest of my that.

Was awesome right there.

Just gotta say that was amazing.

A lot of valves.

Can I buy a valve, please?

You know, on the wheel of Fortune.

And I'm the oldest of the six children of my mother and my father.

Simmisi Tui vai.

Yeah.

And Melo tui vai.

And I'm the 4th oldest, including my dad's first children.

So we had three, and there's nine of us total.

And my mother is Netta Tua tu ivai.

She's a tapa, a lava.

We come from the island of Tonga, immigrated here at four years old as a really wealthy and established Tongan family.

Coming here to the States in 1979, my parents decided to stay, so we filed for immigration status.

We had to overstay, but the immigration gave us a pathway to become what it is that we are, which is part of our American dream, is going from an illegal immigrant to a resident alien.

And as of 2010, my parents and I are all American citizens, which is huge for us and a huge part of the definition of how I define myself because a lot of Tongans, we don't see eye, eye, eye to eye, in terms of my title, in terms of ethnicity or race.

They see themselves as Tongan, American.

I really do see myself as an American that comes from the island of Tonga.

So I really distinguish myself that way because there's no other place in the world where you can wake up one day and go, I want to be a Division One football coach, you know, and then take the pathway to do that.

Not know how to speak English when I first got here and be able to become and do and achieve what it is that I wanted in life, leadership and business other than the United States of America.

I woke up one day and I was no longer good with being just a football coaching and empowering 100 and 10115 student athletes that I wanted to empower the world.

And I felt like that was God's anointing, which was a huge burden for me because at first I was going who me?

Brilliant, gorgeous, talented, famous, empowering other people, traveling the world and empowering coaching Fortune 1500 and 100 companies.

It was really just an audacious moment for me when I transferred and shifted my mindset, my emotional intelligence, my performance perspective and how it is that I communicated into the marketplace and defined to myself like this is who I am, what I want to be.

So I've been doing that since 2011.

Very fortunate to be a part of the UC Davis program where I was a 23 year old walk on.

Absolutely changed my life.

I was the oldest guy in the locker room as a sophomore.

Walked on at UC Davis Division Two.

UC Davis football became a starter.

Yeah, became a starter brother.

And with all of you know of all of the negatives, self doubt, self sabotage, subscribing to haters, mistakes, lying, cheating, stealing, and all the negatives that I have been in my past really is God's unmerited and undeserved favor that got me to UC Davis.

Where I was able to now take what it is that fundamentally my parents taught me all the time I went to church, I was a churchgoer.

I know scripture like like nothing else.

I know scripture like nothing else.

But I never applied it to my life and my choices and that place.

Come on.

Right, The gap between what you know and what you do.

What you do, I mean that that's a totally different deal, right?

And as you feature things in terms of, I mean, I mean what works and what doesn't work?

So I I'm a success coach for Fortune 1501 hundred companies, 42 industries that I have no relevant experience in that expertise and as the mindset, emotional intelligence, performance perspective, and effective communication.

Nothing comes to fruition without performance, execution and work, nothing.

And the combination of those five things are truly amazing.

I met my wife in college, Martha Rackley at the time we got married in Boise, ID in 2007, July 7th, 2007.

We have two children.

My oldest is a standout volleyball player and swimmer Susan Mellor.

Do we buy?

And then my youngest who is 10 years old, he's stand out in five sports plus Jiu Jitsu.

Something I always wanted to karate because I was karate kid back in the day right.

But it's only brother couldn't afford karate or anything else when I was growing up in Pomona, CA and we reside here in Elk Grove, CA.

And really a quote that I live by is one that I already alluded to and spoke of is from my first book Life Champion.

There's money in the transaction but the wealth is in the relationships.

You know, so that's Villiani too.

Evai, Brother Gray.

Love it man and so much to hit there such a great story let's there's all kinds of things we could address but let's let's go to this this gap.

The gap between what you know what you do and and and also like the gap between the the self doubt and the negativity right and then their performance man and and how do you let's let's talk about let's talk about.

You know those elements are bridging the gap because you and I have both been there, right when I was out of my own as a teen teenager.

I'm out of my own man.

It was nothing but selfdoubt and discouragement and and and to a point where I take it on an identity of like now man, other people can succeed.

Other people are lucky.

This is just my lot.

I really, I kind of accepted.

Like I'll always be broke.

I'll always be poor, a man.

Hopefully someday like I can get married and have a family, but.

And things just can be tough for me, right?

Because we grew up, we grew up in a spot like that.

And then I was out of my own.

So bridging that gap, man, how, how do you move?

How, how did you go from from where you were to where you are and how do you help your clients do the same thing?

What, how do we bridge the gap?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And I think, I think guys like me and you, we often times get overly credited for what we've done and achieve accomplished the championships that we've won, become a part of the people that we've helped.

Achieve and do and been.

Really for me, I think that's too much of A superpower because my tongue and ass didn't have any Other choice is either you did or you're going to die.

Come on, that'd be real.

Greg, Yes.

So that's one thing because I've just been inducted into the Hall of Fame.

I get awards and and most of the times I don't have time to even attend.

So I was like looking, I appreciate it.

Can we do it next year?

I'm just not available this year.

It is one I didn't have a choice.

I mean, when you grow up on free and reduced lunch your entire career, you know that there's things that you have to do.

And then standing in a free lunch line, and I say this often, I did tell myself there's no way my kids will ever freaking stand in a free lunch line, right?

Come on.

Same.

So you're right.

And yeah, in Spanish they call it Ala fuerza.

Like you're forced to do some, like you have no other options, like you either you conquer or parish.

But I remember having the same thing, like I'm going through this stuff, things are going to be hard, but if I have if and when I have kids, man, they will not experience experienced.

So part of that is bridging the gap, right?

And there's The Who, what, where, when, how and why.

People talk about why, purpose and all that all the time.

And this is not for everything, but to me, I have met thousands of people that know they're why but still won't do shit right.

So I I I get all that.

But what I'm saying is it's like it's The Who.

How you bridge the gap is understanding and being good that The Who is you, The Who you might be connected to, and The Who is watching you and needing you.

I think that's a powerful force for me in terms of of bridging the gap, going from a guy who was a college dropout to now just paying my own way.

I mean, UC Davis now gives out scholarships back in 99, 2002, 1001 when I was on the football team.

You know, Pell Grant was my scholarship.

You know, I was a Pell Grant guy, so I didn't have to pay much but a but a parking, right.

Come on Greg.

And so so really that's one of the one of the main things that is that I help my clients and then also for me that I've been able to experience not watch on some YouTube video, you know, not just, you know, become a certified coach in something.

And I'm not knocking that, but that's not where my teachings and what I'm talking about comes from.

It's from failing.

Being a deadbeat, being freaking lazy.

Like I said, taking shortcuts, you know, not being about excellence, it is all those things.

And finally going, when am I going to do for me what it is that I expect others to help me with, Be accountable for my own life and do the things that will help me become who it is that I say and think I want to be.

Then it's like, man, I'm a child of God.

And now I cuss more than Christians.

Most Christians do, right?

So some folks will hear me be like, maybe You sure you're Christian?

You're not so Christian.

But they'll see what I do when they're like V Amen.

I'm all good with you cussing the way you rock, the way you help people in your community put on free camps and clinics for thousands of kids a year.

You know, look at my actions, OK?

That's my one vice.

I cuss a lot, right?

But, and then I look at you know, because because if he's for me, who can be against me?

If I am for me, who can be against me?

Who do I really need?

I will attract the right people and not have to chase people if I am good with who I am and good with who's I am.

And then lastly as I talked about is my wife and my children, whatever it is, that that's for them, the experiences they that they want.

That's The Who.

So I get the why and purpose is is something that's vital and important.

But I would always start with bridging the gap with people saying hey I believe in me, what I believe will be respect all and the fear nothing.

I will not be bullied and the bully will not be me.

I believe in me and what I believe will be now.

That's secondary to my faith.

Right.

Because he is the mighty God Who?

Who?

Who came out on nothing and said let there be something and it became whatever he said.

Because he's sovereign, He's absolutely in control, omnipotent, all knowing, not guessing, not wondering, not figuring.

God already knows the end before the beginning, the answer before the question, the sum total before we figure out the equation because he is God.

So when I am connected to my God and I am connected to who it is that I am, then now what it is that I want to achieve and be.

Effective and efficient in the achievement now starts being attractive and starts chasing me because of what I do.

Come on.

And you become this creative force that God intended us to be.

And I really want to emphasize some of you said there was so significant.

I wholeheartedly believe that God is constantly conspiring in our favor, but we often are not conspiring in our own favor.

Yes.

And you hit that, right.

You have to like I I have to believe in me, and I have to like I got to put in my part too, right?

So he's trying to open the doorway.

And how often are we just rolling along in self sabotage?

Yes.

We're just creating our own stumbling blocks when he's trying to clear a path for us.

Yes, Sir.

And these things happen, right, Greg, not because you and I say so this is how life leadership in business works.

We just convey it in such a way that attracts people to now search out our knowledge, right.

But I I love what you're saying and I do believe it.

And that's why we're connected here.

And it's even more so connected here.

And here's the here's the 4th who?

That's very powerful because if serving is below you, leadership, high performance and high success is above you too.

So yes, it's about you.

But once you figure out who you are, when you shift that mindset and that focus to now prioritizing for no real self benefit for yourself, helping other people, that's another part of that who equation that has been dramatic in my life.

I wanted to be a millionaire, then start my nonprofit.

I was praying to God, God, please help me become a millionaire so I can do all these free programs for kids.

Doesn't work like that.

Yeah, I didn't get a gig for nine months.

And then I said, OK, my bad, my bad.

I got this backwards.

My fault, My fault.

I'm going to go start this nonprofit and I'm not going to worry about the money.

And I'm just going to roll and then let your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.

Come on, Come on, Greg.

OK, So man, I'm so glad you you articulated that so well.

Actually, if if everything works out, I'm going to jump on an airplane.

In about 40 hours to fly to Cuba and help clean up the hurricane.

Because I'm like me again, you and I, before recording.

We're talking about adventure.

One of my.

Favorite things in the world is adventure like this.

Humanitarian work and helping people that need the help right now, right?

It's but you're right.

And and we we found it years and years ago.

We founded a nonprofit in Guatemala as well.

Same thing.

And it's like, you know, I don't know how to fund this.

I don't know how to figure this out, but I do know I have to help.

That's right.

Yes Sir.

And and and the irony, the irony of that is, you know, you build what's called the V formation.

Right.

And in in nature it's the most effective and efficient traveling formation.

Where when a group of migratory birds traveling in the formation helping each other increase their range by 71%.

What an irony that you need to focus on you but by helping others you increase your range, your effectiveness, your efficiency for achieving your own goals by working together collaboratively.

Now that's a hard concept for many people to leave and to believe.

And then also that there comes a point at the highest level of CEO's and the folks that I'm so fortunate to work with that pay thousands of dollars an hour just for time.

With me, right is that to get to your next level is no longer can you just focus on you.

It's by mentoring others and giving them the wisdom it is that you have learned through experience to now help empower other people.

That's how the world works, right?

That's the world of success.

That's the world of of our faith.

That's the world of and and the equation for helping others.

That you help yourself level up to your next level.

There is a, there's there's a, there's a ceiling.

But when you continue to help others, there's never a ceiling.

And that legacy is eternal.

That's what I think.

I.

Love that and you and you're right, those those higher levels.

I'm trying to articulate this right like those higher levels perhaps cannot be reached until we're lifting and building and serving and and so I got a, I got a question for you brother, because earlier you talked about getting the results right because results don't lie.

We we've got to make those changes, got to get those accomplishments.

And we have to lift and build.

Do those happen simultaneously?

Again, I'm just, I'm just thinking out loud here, do that happen simultaneously We're serving, lifting a building and getting results or do you need to focus on getting some results 1st and then let's build this kind of a philosophical question here.

Yeah, I think so.

Just in my experience are the opportunities that are before you in the present day.

It becomes a progression for building both your success and your community impact and legacy.

It is the things that get put in front of you where either you have to subtract it from your life to add to your life, right, or you're going to do it.

Though you don't have the time that adds to your life.

So I don't, I don't know much about golf.

Anybody that golfs with me, they know, you know Coach V is that I'm a double, triple bogey guy on the golf course at best, right.

And and but I still am good with it because that's who I am.

And and I love being out there and and and so now though to achieve there has to be some exact want knowledge.

I think a lot of people miss on their achievement and the progression because success and big time success and championships and building dynasties is a progression and it goes up and down and which as we all know but unless you go this is what I want and you're too vague you're never going to get it.

If you're just saying, Lord, I want to be happy and not putting a dollar amount on it.

I found I don't hit the dollar amount, I don't put, you know if I want to impact thousands of kids a year, if I only go, I just want to make an impact on my community.

But you're not detailed like an exact want knowledge.

Well if we have no precise target and bullseye that's what we hit.

But if we do I think that's where big time success is understanding progressive that it does happen.

Community work and serving others is definitely out of your comfort zone.

But doing stupid shit and being around and doing stuff with your time you shouldn't be doing?

That's adding to a plate that we don't nobody has time for.

But service is something I don't have time for in the multimillionaire that I want to become and then billionaire.

And I'm 47 years old.

I've never made $1,000,000 in a year yet.

All of my counterparts in football, they make $1,000,000 just for calling the defense at Texas or being the head coach in Auburn, right?

But like Okay.

So I put in the exact want knowledge on it.

I understand that it's progressive.

And then at the same time, when I don't have time to serve people, that's when you serve because it's going to be out of your comfort zone.

You're going to have to go to Cuba, do it in a time frame that doesn't work for you, and in the place where you'll have no cell phone.

Reception, You're not going to know where you're going to get your meal from, right?

That is real service.

Yeah, you, man.

I love the way you're articulating that and and making that.

You're absolutely right.

In fact, I I went through that same journey like over the last two days.

Like I don't have time for this.

I have to make time for this.

I.

Have to clear my schedule because this is the right thing to do right now.

I love that.

Okay.

Let's let's dive into some specifics because I know the guys are listening here like all right So what?

Well, you gave us specific get very, very clear get out of the vague kind of I want happiness and success.

I want whatever, whatever that means like get dive in.

But then what what are the logistics, brother?

How do you how do you get in the day-to-day what works.

How do you start making changes and getting what I, I like to call it palpable progress.

Oh yeah, that's.

Great.

Hold up in court, man.

Nobody's nobody's going to question whether you're progressing or not.

How do you get that stuff?

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think it's the same for everyone in terms of business and it's very measurable.

You take your goals and then you do a reflection or self inventory where you look at your bank account and you look at your calendar and are those things tracking and progressing you towards or farther away from where you want to go.

It's that simple, but that hard.

Because most people, because they can shoot from the hip.

You can shoot from the hip in these United States of America and make 250 grand a year.

You can shoot from the hip.

Come on, come on.

You could just show up early, stay late and then work yourself seven days a week.

You could do that.

But really there's a couple things right for process.

If those that are taking those write down process, it's replicable steps that replicate success.

Now you tie that back into the things that I just talked about, your bank account you're spending and then how you spend and or invest your time and money.

You look at your calendar and you make sure that there's a sequence in a process and protocols that will reach that will allow you to reach and obtain your goals.

And it's incremental and progressive, but that's where it all starts.

It's starting with you believing in you and who you believe in and The Who that you're standing for and serving.

Then it comes down to doing a self inventory and where your time and your money is going because that's where all success flows is according to numbers and those numbers are time and money.

So again, if you if you track your calendar and there's usually around 14 calendar days that we need to track, right, that's already on the calendar, it goes from New Year's.

To New Year's Eve, right Christmas, Halloween, if you got kids, we got Thanksgiving, we got Memorial Day going backwards, right in September you got summer, August trips.

July, you got 4th of July, you got Father's Day, you got Mother's Day, you got Valentine's Day.

And then plug in your anniversary, the kids' birthdays, your birthday, how many CEO's that I first met?

They're like, wait a minute.

You mean to put down on my calendar that it's my birthday?

Yeah, because you always end up working on your birthday because of the fact that you've never sat down and created a strategy for your time.

We let the company tell us when we should work.

We let opportunities tell us when we should work.

But when we design an empowered schedule that starts first and foremost with your personal faith and family time, and put that down on an annual schedule.

Which, guess what?

Because the dates in those events don't change the next year you just replicate that and change out the destinations you want to go to for vacation, right?

Because if not, work will run our ass over.

Opportunities will run our ass over.

So then, according to empowerment teaching that I teach, you're now blindsided by neglect.

Now all the sudden you come home and wifey and kids are gone and she's tired of.

You making millions but you're never there.

Or if she's the 1:00 making millions and then the husband is leaving because of the same thing, Because of the fact that you feel like you're around and providing, but you're not present.

So if there's two things I would love people to consider is first and foremost the framework that I talked about.

Mindset, emotional intelligence, performance perspective, and effective communication.

Anybody who operates on those 5 levels on a high level succeed at everything.

Look it up.

Take a look and it'll tell you the same thing.

And then now if you look at your money and your calendar and how you budget and or forecast and execute a strategy that's down on paper, not freaking shooting from the hip, everything we want to do, become and achieve is achievable, absolutely achievable by anybody.

But here's the main catch.

The effectiveness and efficiency and the succeeding will happen whether you get coached by you, me, or anybody who teaches that concept and called organizing becoming a professional.

Stop freaking wasting time and money.

But that's only part of it, because success is attainable by anyone.

What's not attainable is now translating that success into joy, peace, happiness, fulfillment, love, and family time.

Let me say that again.

What is not normal is having the awareness now to translate that success, that cheddar, that cloud, that influence the ability to reach people and translate that into joy, peace, happiness, fulfillment, love and family time.

And that's where my business has really blown up, because that's how I approach it, Brother Gray.

You know, and that's that's that's what it's all about.

That's the juice.

That's what I call the juice.

Right.

It's squeezing the juice out of life, right?

And and getting that.

That's why we do what we do.

But but you're right, it doesn't always translate.

Even we start cheating, start accomplishing it, like hitting all the stuff.

What's wrong?

You got to translate into this this feeling of just energy and vitality and pure joy to be alive where?

Your your alarm clock is an opportunity clock.

That's right.

And you wake up every day excited to be alive.

Man, I love, love, love what you're saying there and and it's worth just driving as you were.

You did so well again and again.

It's just saying look does your calendar reflect your your goals, your targets, your dreams.

And it's far too often it does not.

There's there's like this crazy incongruence.

You, you keep, there's no alignment there.

You keep missing, well, show me your calendar, because that's showing you where you're going and and a lot of you like you put it out so well, you're just going on default, man.

You're all along letting other people dictate what you do and you're just not being strategic enough.

Brother Greg, you said 2 words that are powerful within empowerment to success.

In terms of how I I teach it, I approach it.

I've lived it and experienced it.

Well, most people call work life balance is really just a priority and shifting priorities.

The balance, that's a 5050 is a myth, right?

It's just like you got to work, you got to do certain things.

Even when you're retired, there's still things you need to do around the house.

She's getting the laundry done and the freaking groceries done in a week.

That's one of my hardest challenges.

Come on, can I talk some real talk, let alone the other stuff that we don't shoot from the hip from, right?

But you said the two words you're not feeling work, life imbalance.

What you're feeling is an incongruence and a misalignment in terms of your life trajectory and how you live your day every day.

That's the main feeling, is something who you believe in and what you believe is nudging you.

That this is not aligned and congruent with who were you were created to be or who you choose to be, one or the other, whatever you believe.

Right.

And then when the choices do not reflect that, we pay the consequences.

When our decisions that determine destiny do not reflect a calendar with now execution and performance into that calendar, what we feel now is misalignment and incongruence.

So that's huge in terms of personal development, in the personal development space is congruence and alignment and if you're missing that all.

Now, if you're missing that in the seven alls that I coach, these are trained personally, personal, familial, spiritual, professional, financial, relational and mental, you're really going to get messed up.

Because now that's the hard part.

It's just not work life balance.

It's work life balance within those 787 phases and components that I teach create the human experience.

Yeah.

And it's it's taking that.

The whole man.

That's right.

Every bit of it, right.

It's this.

This whole, I like to call it holistic Optimization is literally what you're describing.

It was just optimizing every part of who you are as as a human being, but as the best version of yourself, which I believe is your real self.

That's the real self.

Yes, Sir.

And and the whole man deal when you brought that up?

You know, upon just us reaching out to each other to get on the show, I mean, like, what are we going to do?

I mean people always goes, man, don't half ass it.

Yeah, whole ass it.

You got a whole ass it.

Like, I know that sounds weird, especially for most Christians watching this deal, right?

But I mean like, so.

And and here's a term that comes from one of the greatest books that I've ever read outside the Bible and then outside of.

The other high performing books that is that I've read that has really helped me.

Good to great, like the basic Fundamentals, Good to great.

And all those books coming to now High Performing Habits by Brendan Bouchard is when you're not your whole man or the coach of V7 Alls, you're not able to do what's called prolific quality output.

They call it PQ ones.

I call it most vital tasks.

So most vital tasks when you focus on the things.

That are most vital and should be a priority according to time, place and circumstance.

Most people, 90% of people according to the surveys and and the studies say that most people that feel that they're aware are unaware.

So that's one.

Most people don't even have a clue where they are, where they're going, what they're doing and all that.

But if you get the whole man going, then you maximize your days and your priorities and the things that life has and you create what's called prolific.

Brenan Bashard is a Brenan Bashar term, not a Coach V term.

Prolific quality output.

So if it's not creating prolific quality output, I call it addition by subtraction, which is cut it.

If it does not create success, joy, peace, happiness, fulfillment, love, and family time.

Cut it.

And that's how you actually simplify your life so you can now focus and prioritize the things that really matter.

Exactly.

And And that requires what's interesting.

I'm sure you've seen it.

I see it.

That can be tough for some people.

And in fact, it was, it was tough for me.

In our journey, we we had to start saying no more often, and you got to cut the crap.

And it's almost like this, this quiet fierceness of like, no, man, I'm not bringing that in.

I'm not allowing it in.

Like, if it doesn't add real value to my life, it's out.

It's out.

And people don't understand that.

And then the crowd, the masses, they're like, come on and you're like, no, man.

I'm here to.

Really.

Really.

Live.

And so anything that's kind of iffy for me, it's out.

Yeah, yeah, it's vitality you talked about.

That word you brought that up earlier is protecting your energy and your state of mind and your emotion.

I have never seen where I have been negative speak negative, whine, complain and blame or be around others that do.

Those negative things amount to anything positive ever, right.

So protecting that energy, right?

And when I say there's money in the transaction but the wealth is in the relationships, most of that battle is staying the hell away from people that bring no value and that are doing the wrong things.

And that and and the hardest thing, especially being people that value family or this Polynesian sense of we're all about family.

I stay the hell away from people that even my brothers and sisters when they when they're negative, I just stay away.

I'm like, hey, look, I get wire like that, but that's not how I wrote Now for people that are Polynesian that I'm not even related to like Dwayne Johnson, That's the rock I claim him.

So if you're successful and you're Polynesian, Coach V is claiming you too.

Because I'm all about that positive vibe, right?

And and that's how Polynesia is.

But I think that's how any human ethnicity is, is that they value family but you also have to have an awareness to go this is not good for me or them and and stay away and steer clear.

Yeah, I'm not.

I'm not going to participate.

Yes, Sir.

It's like Wayne Wayne Dyer used to talk about.

He's like, look, man, I'm.

I'm not participating in tribal events anymore.

Keep inviting me.

If there's some negativity there, like no thanks, I'm out.

So beautiful, man.

This is all so good.

Are there specific, like really kind of dialed in now?

Are specific daily rituals, routines, habits that really have been like kind of a bedrock now for you?

The the things how you get up or how you go to bed or or the kind of a daily daily rituals or routines or habits patterns that are making a difference for you or your clients.

Yeah, it just like we're talking about is like what do we ingest and what do we consume and what what do we engage in.

I I do really believe within the formulas it is that I teach that are social formulas, daily habits, activities, routines.

And automated tasks lead to flow.

Flow creates momentum.

Momentum lifts you to your next level of life Leadership in business and not because I say so.

This is how life leadership in business works.

So I'm an early riser.

I'm up right around, you know, Mamba Kobe Bryant time 3:34 AM, right?

And I get going with two things right?

And the 1st is a prayer just of gratitude and really asking for nothing.

Just grateful.

Lord, I'm so grateful today.

Thank you so much, Lord, for life for health, provision, protection, wisdom, family and friends.

It's the same prayer every single day.

And I'm a national keynote speaker, so I've memorized this prayer.

I'm so grateful for my wife, my kids keep everybody safe.

Lord, there's so much evil and injustice going on all over the world, let alone just here in the United States.

We pray for your hedge of protection.

And thank you for your hedge of protection over all of us then.

I meditate on the specifics of what I want to achieve.

For the 1st 3 minutes of the day I just sit there and then I meditate and then so in that if I don't have an East Coast client which usually starts around 4:00 AM Pacific Standard Time, or I don't have a Singapore or New Zealand client at any time of the day.

That I have a open space.

I will allow myself that if I'm meditating during lunch on the sofa because I already made $10,000 this morning on a Zoom call.

Then if I fall asleep, that's okay, because sometimes I'll meditate on something for a few minutes and my mind will just get so relaxed I'll just fall asleep.

And then after that is it's just being with the kids, right?

And my social media post.

So I'll get a social media post done and and prepare breakfast.

Now my kids are 10 and 13.

They're like, Nah, I'm just going to pop in a waffle and go waffle and then so then I'll turn and try to get a couple posts in.

I still post a lot of my stuff all by myself on LinkedIn, IG Facebook.

Then after I drop off the kids and make sure they're cool and we spend some time in the morning, we always do some type of sports training for 10 to 15 minutes and we have a long driveway for my daughter, volleyball or football or baseball or my daughter just working on her strokes, mentally just pay.

Here's your swim stroke.

Right.

Working on that because that progression of daily habits creates that flow for all of us.

Then I do some type of workout, some type of activity running 2 miles, jogging 3 miles.

Write anything like that with some type of high intensity interval training in the driveway when the kids are off.

Or I go play hoops and try to dominate all these 25 year olds even though I'm still at 7 right then.

My client calls usually go between 11:00 AM and 2:00 PM and on my podcast radio station stuff where you know, I have a Hollywood radio show called The Coach V Show.

That's personal development out of out of dash radio on Hollywood Blvd.

I usually fit in clients all the way through then or getting prospective people for the show and or recording the show during that time and then once I hit 2:30 as an entrepreneur that's how I set up my life.

I'm going to pick up the kids taking the practice, be their coach, have dinner, prep.

If my wife is off, we prep dinner so we just warm it up when we get home.

And then we go to practices all the way up to five and games all the way up to five, 630 depending on the day, all the way up to seven.

And then we come home.

I might have a meeting or two just really quickly, 30 minute client meetings depending on because when it's nighttime here in New Zealand and Australia, I could jump on with a prospective client.

Then after that, we just all kind of kick back on the sofa.

My my son and daughter do a 30 minute reading period in the evening.

Then we get together as family.

Now when I'm driving the kids to school every morning, they do three things.

They do a prayer that I believe in me poem that I just spoke on this podcast and then they do John 316, right.

So those are the things that have created tremendous flow.

And from 11:00 to 1:00 to 2:00 PM it's.

Calendar clients making money, acquisition of new clients, new opportunities and that has created tremendous flow.

Saturdays and Sundays.

I used to work, but now I'm either coaching the kids.

We're traveling somewhere.

We do three big vacations a year.

For us, a big vacation is 7 to 18 days, just depending on the time frame.

And then we do one mini vacation a month which is a 2 day or somewhere here in California, Las Vegas.

There's plenty of places to go.

And so that's an approach to the annual calendar and my daily habits along with Sundays being church, a little football and hanging out.

Love it right?

And it all reflects the intentionality there.

Very deliberate how to make this work and.

And and what we hear, I'm sure you hear this I hear it's like, I mean you can't make that work but but you're right.

It's like when you when you take that and you say this is how I want my life to be, is how I want my lifestyle to be.

This is how I'm prioritizing.

Then you you make it fit works in there where you can spend so much time with your kids practicing their sport or being at their practices or at their games.

Yeah, yeah.

I didn't know anything about baseball three years ago.

I'm going to be the first.

I'm going to be the head coach this year, you know, So my, my, my son.

At 8-9 and ten, I was an assistant coach.

Now I'm going to be the head coach this year.

I never thought I'd have so much Dory sitting on a a can of baseballs on on the side of a diamond coaching a sport I never played, I was never interested in, but because my son has a passion for it, because my daughter has a passion for swimming or volleyball.

Man, we go all in and engage so they could be high performers in what they do.

And then, you know, I asked my daughter, I wanted to be her volleyball coach and she goes, no, dad, can somebody else be my coach for this one?

OK, cool.

She's 13.

You know it.

That's just how it is.

I don't always get to engage.

Everybody has an opportunity to make their choices and decisions, and we live it from from there.

But what we will not do is shoot from the hip.

I know it's hard to design that.

But it's easier to pivot and make an audible when you have stuff down on the calendar than it is to just shoot from the hip.

And then you go and call an audible and you're supposed to be on a call at 6:00 AM And then all the that is like, I just wake up and go, hey, what's on my calendar, what's on my calendar tomorrow, you know, And so that's part of it as well as waking up in the morning.

And as soon as I wake up after my prayers and meditation, look at the calendar, look at that, looking at the calendar for the next day and what's coming in the coming days.

So that I'm always forecasting but but also being as present as I can be.

Yeah, I love it, man.

The intentionality, the deliberate, the deliberate action here is amazing.

And love, love the family trip thing.

We do the same thing.

We take big trips every year.

So I call it the the whole framework I use is, is micro dosing and macro dosing, right.

So the macros, the big big experiences, big investments like unforbeatable stuff And then the kind of micro dosing is, is it's the small trips, right.

You're saying every month same.

I'm like OK, we're going to do a little adventure here and we do the same with my wife.

So we going to we go on a date every week.

We do it overnight or every month.

Every quarter we do two or three days away and then every year she and I, just the two of us go and we'll do 10 to 14 days something big.

Right.

So same, it's the same with the marriage, same with kids like you're doing.

And it it makes all the difference because it's the connection, it's the investment, it's the memories, which are absolutely priceless.

Absolutely.

And the one disclaimer I think and you tell me if you agree, that doesn't mean that.

The wifey and I will not agree on stuff.

We will still disagree adamantly on stuff.

The kids will still be kids, right?

But you're able to get back on track faster and trust each other more because of those experiences.

What do you think, Greg?

Exactly.

What's it?

So one of the things I like to share with my clients is like this ideas, it it's, it just occurred to me one.

I mean, it just hit me so hard one morning.

It's hard to get lost in life.

If you check the map every morning, right.

And so you're right.

So any deviations with with marriage or the kids or life when you're checking back in and you're making this part of how you do life.

This is just the the family way of being then then it's it's it's easier to recover it prevents a lot of headache and problems and and you're.

You're living in high performance and well, I love what you were just illustrating there so well.

Not only are you helping your kids and look at the advantage we're giving our children by teaching them to be high performers from early on, but also their friends and their teammates and and the youth around them and leaning into that.

We're giving these kids tools that you and I wish we'd had when we were their age.

Absolutely making that game changing difference, man.

Yes, Sir, absolutely.

Yes Sir.

I love it.

And I and I do have to credit a lot of this from from football.

Like all I did was take the detailed agendas and itineraries and having a plan for everything and willing to live with the consequences from come.

Being a part of championship programs, being at UC Davis and Boise State really taught me to have a schedule like that.

That's where it all came from.

Yes, Sir.

And execute those plays.

And yes, Sir.

Yes Sir.

The fundamentals, I know, I I just know this from from you playing that level you worked on the fundamentals from the little, the footwork.

And the.

Movements, the explosions, right?

You just take those principles and practices and apply them to life.

Yes Sir.

Practice and preparation and planning.

Those three things will do a lot for anyone and people go well.

How do you keynote speak so well?

And then?

And people pay me that that make more money than me.

And Keynote speaking nationally go man, I want you to teach me what you do.

Right.

Like the number one.

What about just practicing your script?

Well, you know, I want to do it.

I kind of want to be, you know, spontaneous.

Yeah, good luck with that.

Because then you can't manufacture and replicate it.

People when you don't have a script.

I'm not saying that you can't be an amazing speaker without a script, but when you say the same.

That this to the same people, different things, where it's inconsistent at different places, their trust in you decreases.

So let me say that again.

So you have to be able to say that same thing fundamentally to different people at different locations that's going to come out and hear you speak.

And when there's an inconsistency in your messaging and how you say it, then they're going to realize you're not professional and you're shooting from the hip.

That's all.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh, that's good.

It's interesting that the circles back in the same principle on the drive with your kids.

You're having them quote scripture and and we have.

We have what we call it's our our family philosophy journal.

And in this journal we've got quotes, poems and scriptures that we all repeat in our morning devotionals when we're sitting down to breakfast.

We're all repeating.

We're all going through them and and drill and and the kids can add to it.

You know, we we add to.

It's like the the most important stuff, the things we want to live by, we want deeply ingrained in our in our conscious and subconscious mind.

And even the Littles, right, the really littles, they're sitting there, they're not paying attention to anything.

But a few weeks later they can quote it word for word.

That's right, we're.

Getting these these ideas, that's right into their lives, into their hearts, into their souls, and then it shapes who we become and how we live life.

That's right.

So so especially because.

When you recognize that okay, what's a what's a 5 year old kid who can memorize a whole Metallica song or a whole Tupac Shakur or a song, right?

If they can memorize those things, why can't they memorize anything?

Well, the reason why is we won't take the time to teach them.

And have them repeat what it is that we play on the radio without knowing.

Because they're in the car and they're going to know those lyrics anyway, right?

So why wouldn't we socially program them to at least fundamentally have the right notions and approaches in their mind?

But now they have to grasp and deploy according to what they experience.

But if it's not fundamentally set, because that's the thing, how many languages can can the kid learn?

As many as we're willing to teach them, adults are a little bit harder because we have so many preconceived notions.

Adults don't see things as they are.

We all see things as we are the myriad of experiences.

So there's always a lot of just pushback and and criticism and not trusting when you're an adult, but when you're a kid, you can teach and program them anything because they don't have all the biases that adults have and so but with adults.

Anything that we repeatedly do, we become.

And then I have people tell me what they are, but I know who they are, but why they do.

And when you have that type of wisdom, you just move in a way that's going to be more effective and efficient.

So true.

So powerful brother.

Yes, Sir.

I love I can.

I can tell who you are by what you do by.

What?

You know, people tell me that.

It's it's our practices prove our priorities like we can, we can talk all day long.

That's one thing I like to say.

In fact I just spoke.

They they flew me out to speak in Denver last week and it was one of the things I shared that I'm like, look, what if your life were a silent film.

That's right.

You can't tell us what's important to you.

We all get to.

See such a.

Powerful framework.

I love to ask myself that.

Like, hey man, what if my life were a silent film?

What would people see really matters to me?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And so my daughter lost their first game during the number one team in the district here in Elk Grove, CA at six.

And oh, so I pull up and our neighbor, who his daughter is in 7th grade, so they play right after us and he goes, you know what, Nobody's going to beat your daughter's team, man.

They're going to go undefeated.

And I said, you know, that's the thing about sports and life.

It is the real reality show and you never can tell.

But we're going to find out because what they're going to do is going to tell us they lost two sets straight.

They've only lost three sets the whole season.

And so and it was 2523 and 2523, both sets.

And then it was like a college atmosphere for a 8th grade volleyball game and the spikes and stuff was just high level.

But that's the thing.

And then OK, we lost and my daughter knows and I said.

OK, what matter what happens to you matters.

What matters more is how you respond both when you win because you've been six and oh, playing some sorry ass teams and then you're like, oh, you know, I'm good.

I don't have to spike hard.

I don't have to do this hard.

I don't have to do that hard because we're going to win.

Yeah, but when you show up against the team that's evenly matched, then how will you perform?

OK, so then you lost.

Now how will you respond?

Good life lessons right there, man.

Yes, Sir, A hard one to learn.

Yeah, even for me as a parent, but that's how it works.

I love this stuff brother.

Thank you so much, so much goodness here.

Any Any last thoughts?

Anything else you want to share that maybe we haven't touched on yet, But you feel like, man, this it matters and it's important to you.

Yeah, just like I am so grateful.

That Someone Like You would reach out to someone like me who's really aspiring to get to the levels and I get a lot of good stuff and I'm doing a lot of good stuff.

But looking at what you're doing, I'm just so grateful.

And that that would be my last message is just that, you know, there are those that are grateful and those that will be made by life to be grateful, and that nothing good comes from being ungrateful.

Along with this selfdoubt deal of like cuz cuz really it is.

It is both, you know, in our greatness and on our insecurities.

Well, we ask ourselves, right Who am I?

Who are we?

Who me.

Brilliant, gorgeous, talented and famous?

Well, actually, who are you not to be?

Because you are a child of God and you playing small doesn't serve the world and there's nothing freaking enlightening about shrinking back so that other people won't feel insecure around you.

You were born to make manifest the glory that is within us.

And it is not just in some of us, it is in all of us.

And as we let our light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same.

As you and me are liberated by our own fear, now our mere presence automatically liberates others.

Be grateful and believe in you, friends and family.

And thank you so much.

I'm so grateful, Greg, for the opportunity.

It's a fellowship with you on this call.

It's beautiful and brother, you can you can feel the gratitude radiate from you.

And it's I appreciate.

It and it's beautiful.

I I appreciate it.

I appreciate you on being on here and and who you have shaped and molded yourself to be and living, living with these priorities so you can be a force for good in the world, man.

Yes, Sir.

Following your lead, brother.

Keep leading.

We're following over here.

Where?

Where can people find you, man?

How can they connect with you?

Yeah, Website iscoach-v.com coach-v.com and my Instagram handles and LinkedIn Villiami to Evi and Coach Villiami.

Reach out to me for anything if there's any way that I could serve and help you and your success.

But not just that success, but to translate it into joy, peace, happiness, fulfillment, love and fam time.

I like your boy.

Love it.

Awesome.

Thank you brother.

Appreciate you.

Thank you so much, Greg.