Episodes

In this episode of Monarch for Love, Michelle Hays explores the painful disconnect that happens when love is present but goes unrecognized. Discover how assumptions, unmet expectations, and the stories we tell ourselves can create emotional distance—even in marriages where two people genuinely love each other. You’ll learn how to recognize the love that may have become invisible, get curious about what you’re really feeling, and communicate your needs without turning disappointment into disconne...

In this week's episode, Michelle challenges the belief that strong relationships are built on sameness. You’ll learn why differences in communication, emotions, and personality do not automatically mean you chose the wrong person—and why understanding matters more than thinking alike. Compatibility may make love feel easier at first. But curiosity, emotional regulation, repair, and respect are what help love last when life gets hard.🔗 Website: www.monarchforlove.com 📘 Book: www.awakenedheartsboo...

In this week's episode of the Monarch for Love Podcast, Michelle explains the difference between reaching for connection and creating pressure. You’ll learn how anxiety can turn a healthy need into a demand, why the pursue-withdraw cycle keeps couples stuck, and how to express what you need without pushing your partner further away. The answer isn’t to stop caring. It’s to reach for connection in a way that invites your husband closer.🔗 Website: www.monarchforlove.com 📘 Book: www.awakenedhearts...

Can two people deeply love each other and still struggle to stay connected? Absolutely. In this week's episode, Michelle challenges one of the most common beliefs about relationships: that love should be enough. Love may bring two people together, but love alone does not teach us how to regulate our emotions, communicate when we are hurt, repair after conflict, challenge our assumptions, or create emotional safety. Michelle shares what she learned from the end of her first marriage, the struggl...

Is your spouse using silence to punish you—or are they emotionally overwhelmed and shutting down? In this episode of the Monarch for Love Podcast, Michelle explains the important difference between the silent treatment and stonewalling—and why confusing the two can create even more hurt and distance in a relationship. You’ll learn how silence can become a weapon, why some partners withdraw when their nervous system becomes overwhelmed, and how the stories we tell ourselves during those quiet mo...

Why can you be deeply loved by your spouse and still feel completely unloved? In this episode of the Monarch for Love Podcast, Michelle explores how quickly assumptions can shape the way we see our spouse. A missed text, a distracted response, or a lack of affection can easily become, “They don’t care,” “I’m not important,” or “Nothing will ever change.” But assumptions are not facts. You’ll learn how negative stories create defensiveness, distance, and confirmation bias—and how one simple shift...

Grief isn’t only about death. It can show up when we get married, become parents, move, face infertility, become empty nesters, care for someone we love, or realize life didn’t unfold the way we expected. In this episode of the Monarch for Love Podcast, Michelle talks with compassionate transition coach and bestselling author Laylani Colibri-Jack about the conflicting feelings that come with change—and how those unrecognized emotions can quietly affect our closest relationships. You’ll learn why...

Most marriages don't end with a dramatic fight or a single heartbreaking moment. They begin to fade when one or both partners quietly stop trying. The conversations become fewer. The hope starts to dim. The effort slowly turns into resignation. In this week's episode of Monarch for Love, Michelle Hays explores the subtle moment when emotional withdrawal begins, why it happens, and what couples can do before distance becomes disconnection. If you've ever thought, "Nothing I do makes a difference ...

Do you ever feel like you're having the same argument with your spouse over and over again...just with different details? In this episode of Monarch for Love, Michelle Hays explores why recurring conflict isn't usually about the issue you're discussing. More often, it's about the deeper feelings hiding beneath the surface: feeling unheard, misunderstood, unappreciated, or unloved. Learn how to identify the emotional patterns driving your disagreements, why emotional safety is essential for lasti...

If your marriage stayed exactly as it is today, would you feel fulfilled staying in it? It's a simple question, but it has the power to reveal what's really happening beneath frustration, disappointment, and uncertainty. In this episode of Monarch for Love, Michelle Hays explores why clarity matters more than impulsive decisions, and how understanding what isn't working can be the first step toward creating the relationship you truly want. Sometimes the question isn't whether you should stay or ...

In this week's episode of Monarch for Love, Michelle Hays explores how the stories we create about our partner's behavior often shape our feelings more than the behavior itself. Learn why assumptions create disconnection, how curiosity creates connection, and how one simple question can transform the way you experience your marriage. The meaning comes first. The emotion follows. And that awareness can change everything. Before you assume the worst about your spouse, listen to this conversation—i...

Many people believe they're unhappy in their marriage when they're actually exhausted, overwhelmed, and emotionally depleted. In this episode of Monarch for Love, Michelle Hays explores a powerful distinction that could change the way you see your relationship. Before deciding something is wrong with your marriage, learn why your internal state influences how you experience your partner and how self-love, self-care, and emotional awareness can restore clarity, connection, and hope. Sometimes it'...

Your marriage looks good from the outside. There’s no major betrayal, no constant conflict, and yet something feels missing. In this episode, Michelle explores why feeling unloved doesn't necessarily mean you aren't loved. Learn how communication, expectations, emotional exhaustion, and the way we give and receive love can create a disconnect between love that exists and love that is felt. Sometimes the problem isn't a lack of love. It's a lack of understanding. Love is a decision supported by s...

In this episode of Monarch for Love, Michelle Hays challenges one of the biggest relationship myths, that communication is the real problem in marriage. Michelle explores how emotional state, tension, defensiveness, and unspoken energy shape conversations long before words are spoken. This powerful conversation will help you understand why couples feel misunderstood, why defensiveness happens so quickly, and how changing the way you show up can completely transform connection.🔗 Website: www.mona...

In this week's episode of Monarch for Love, Michelle Hays shares the dangerous moment many people experience right before deciding to leave their marriage, the moment where disconnection starts feeling like truth. Michelle explores the difference between feelings and facts, why emotional narratives can distort relationships, and the powerful questions every couple should ask before making a permanent decision. Because sometimes the problem is not the absence of love, but the absence of the skill...

In this week's episode of Monarch for Love, Michelle Hays explores the quiet disconnection so many couples experience, when nothing is obviously wrong, yet the relationship no longer feels close. Michelle shares how emotional distance is often created through unattended moments, lack of presence, and losing intentional connection over time. This powerful conversation will help you understand why couples drift apart and how small shifts in attention can begin rebuilding closeness again.🔗 Website:...

In this episode of Monarch for Love, Michelle Hays explores the real reason so many loving couples feel disconnected. This powerful conversation dives into emotional triggers, communication breakdowns, assumptions, and the relationship skills most people were never taught. Michelle introduces the core pillars of Love Literacy and explains why lasting love is not just about chemistry or feelings, it is about learning how to sustain connection over time.🔗 Website: www.monarchforlove.com 📘 Book: ww...

In this week's episode of Monarch for Love, Michelle Hays explores why so many people love their spouse deeply but no longer feel loved in their marriage. Michelle shares personal insight, emotional truths, and practical relationship wisdom to help couples understand the difference between love being gone and love no longer being felt. Because sometimes the problem is not the absence of love, it is the absence of the skills needed to experience it.🔗 Website: www.monarchforlove.com 📘 Book: www.aw...

In this honest episode of Monarch for Love, Michelle and her husband Brian share the emotional and relational shifts that came with retirement after Brian’s 42-year career in the tech industry. From identity loss and changing routines to communication, emotional safety, and learning how to slow down together, this conversation offers a real look at life after work. Because retirement doesn’t just change your schedule. It changes your relationship too.🔗 Website: www.monarchforlove.com 📘 Book: www...

In this honest conversation, I’m joined by my husband, Brian, as we unpack the expectations we carried into our first marriages—and how they shaped what came after. We share the beliefs that didn’t hold up, the lessons we learned the hard way, and the realities of marriage no one really talks about. If you’ve ever wondered why love feels different than you expected, this episode will help you understand what’s actually going on and what it takes to build something stronger the second time around...

Most loveless marriages don’t end suddenly...they fade in stages. In this episode, we walk through subtle disconnection, emotional loneliness, and emotional detachment, so you can recognize where you are and what’s actually happening beneath the surface. You’ll learn how to tell the difference between love fading and connection breaking...and why understanding that difference could change everything.🔗 Website: www.monarchforlove.com 📘 Book: www.awakenedheartsbook.com Instagram: @Monarchforlove T...

You can feel unloved in a relationship where love still exists. In this week's episode, Michelle introduces Love Literacy, the missing skill set behind emotional connection, communication, and lasting love. Because the problem isn’t always love. Sometimes, it’s what we were never taught.🔗 Website: www.monarchforlove.com 📘 Book: www.awakenedheartsbook.com Instagram: @Monarchforlove TikTok @monarchforlove

Money is one of the biggest sources of stress in relationships. In this week's episode, Michelle and her husband Brian break down simple, practical ways to manage money as a couple, build a financial safety net, and reduce stress in your relationship. From emergency savings to everyday habits, you’ll learn how to feel more secure, more aligned, and more at peace with your finances together.🔗 Website: www.monarchforlove.com 📘 Book: www.awakenedheartsbook.com Instagram: @Monarchforlove TikTok @mon...

It’s not the moment that damages your relationship. It’s how you respond to it. In this week's episode, I teach you my 3D Emotional Reset, a simple way to stop reacting, regulate your emotions, and choose a response that builds connection instead of distance.🔗 Website: www.monarchforlove.com 📘 Book: www.awakenedheartsbook.com Instagram: @Monarchforlove TikTok @monarchforlove