Episodes

Today I'm sharing a tool I've used for many years to help me stay in alignment with my values and my higher wisdom. These 4 pieces of advice come from teacher Angeles Arrien and her Four-Fold Way - I have paraphrased them over the years and this is how I think of them. I'll talk about each one and then give an example of how to use this tool in any situation such as helping a loved one who is grieving. Show up. Pay attention. Tell the truth. Don't attach to the outcome. Check out my website at...

In this episode I share why it's important to be aware of your own spirituality whether you believe in God or not. You can work on your spiritual growth and the expansion of your consciousness even if you don't or can't believe in a deity. In fact it's essential that we each do this work now in order to become our best and highest selves. This episode includes: Why we each need to be aware of our own spiritual nature. A new definition of spirituality that doesn't require a deity. Three levels...

In this episode I discuss the 5th lesson the ego needs to learn: You are going to die. This is the most difficult concept for the ego to master because death is ego's greatest fear. I'll share why learning this lesson is essential before true spiritual growth can occur and how to continually work on this concept. Confronting the mortality of the physical body is an ongoing, life-long practice! This episode includes: Why this is the last of the 5 lessons. Why we can't rush ahead into teachings ...

In this episode we discuss the 4th lesson the ego needs to learn, which is "You are not in control." This is one of the greatest challenges for the ego since its primary desire is to achieve control over as much of life as possible. But that's why this is one of the most important steps toward spiritual growth - helping your ego surrender to higher wisdom and consciousness. This episode includes: Why the ego is determined to control our lives. The mixed messages in our society (and our own min...

In this episode I talk about the 3rd lesson the ego needs to learn, which is "Your life is not about you." This is a challenging lesson for us to hear but an important one. The ego needs to learn that life has a higher and greater purpose than just this human existence. This episode includes: We are part of the greater purpose but we don't create or control that purpose. We may not even understand or comprehend the role we play in the greater purpose. We are actually here to be channels of lo...

In this episode I share the first of a series of "lessons" the ego needs to learn in order to become a better ally for our higher consciousness and for our day-to-day lives. "Life is hard" is not something the ego likes to look at but that realization is the very beginning of all of our spiritual growth. This episode includes: The ego divides everything into "good" and "bad" and places blame on others for the "bad" parts of life. Why ego-controlled thinking leads to perpetual victimhood. How ...

In this episode I share some excerpts from my book The Journey from Ego to Soul and talk about why we need to recognize the ego when it controls our behavior instead of our higher consciousness. This episode includes: A description of the ego's common behaviors. How to recognize times when your ego is in control. Understanding that the wounds your ego hides will always have an effect on how you see the world. Why looking at our ego behaviors honestly can help us identify our shadow issues, a...

Today I'll discuss how to experience something new in our relationships rather than replaying old history again and again in our interactions. This discussion includes: How the brain's negativity bias has caused us to store old memories of pain and woundedness regarding our relationships (the "box of resentments"). How our confirmation bias also prevents us from recognizing growth and change in our partners but rather leads us to see what we already believe to be true. How we can override our...

I'm recording this episode on 8/8/21 which is the "Lionsgate Portal" - a time of creativity, healing, and a shift toward new "agreements" for our lives. I'll share why this particular moment in time has been very powerful for me and how my own consciousness is shifting right now. Here are some of the topics inspired by an email I received from spiritual teacher Matt Kahn: Why right now it's important to shift into our higher consciousness selves rather than our "ego-selves". When we make this s...

In this episode let's talk about what it takes to be a leader for those around you when you are going through a challenging time (like the COVID pandemic we are experiencing right now.) We are all leaders in some way whether or not we hold administrative or managerial positions. Here are some skills to help us ride the waves of crisis like a surfer rather than be tossed about in the tumult: Be adaptable and learn to be grateful for change. Stop trying to control what cannot be controlled. See...

In this episode we dive into the challenging subject of self-forgiveness, why it's important and how to do it! This is a project I'm currently working on that I plan to continue for the rest of my life. This episode includes: The definition of self-forgiveness. Studies on forgiveness that show it takes a process over time to complete. Why self-love and self-forgiveness go hand-in-hand. The "Pillars" of self-forgiveness. A 9-step process toward actually forgiving yourself. Download the note...

In this episode I talk about grace, which is an essential element of any dance. Learn how the many different of meanings of grace apply to both life and death and discover a daily practice that can help us prepare for the end of life with ease and dignity. This episode includes: The many definitions of “grace”. That grace is always given freely, not earned or deserved. How grace “finds us” during our darkest times of brokenness. Forgiveness as an act of grace. How I want to live and die wit...

In this episode I talk about rhythm, which is an essential element of any dance. Learn how the rhythm of nature and the universe includes both stillness and motion, waiting and movement, and how we can find peace and hope by surrendering to this rhythm as it unfolds in the moment. This episode includes: Why it’s important that rhythm contains both stillness and movement, whether in dance, music, or the written word. The power of the liminal space of waiting for an uncertain outcome. Why spir...

This is part 2 of the series on the intertwining of life and death in a perfect dance that spirals throughout eternity. This episode covers: Why we cannot live fully (and in balance) if we ignore death. How the medical system perpetuates the separation of death from life. How being mindful of death helps us let go of attachments and live with equanimity. Practices for bringing death awareness into daily life: Morning gratitude practice. Mantra: This day is a gift. Notice death around you ...

This begins a 4-part series I call "The Dance of Life and Death." You'll learn where the title comes from when you listen! This episode includes: Rainer Maria Rilke’s letters to the bereaved. Why death and life are locked in an inseparable dance. How we learn slowly about death through life’s experiences. How to cope with the unique timing of life’s events when it doesn’t fit our hopes and expectations. Why even our mistakes and failures turn out to be perfect. We must live in both, be int...

In this episode we'll look at why self-love is important and why it's so hard to do. I share poems by Alex Elle, Rupi Kaur and Nikita Gill plus a story of a self-love workshop gone wrong that turned out to be the perfect thing. Here are some suggestions from Buddha's Brain by Rick Hanson for working toward healing of our self-judgment, wounds, and shame: Recognize the pain and shame when it arises; where is it coming from? what is the underlying wound? Cool down the judgment and soothe the pai...

This episode tells the story of the mysterious and miraculous lotus blossom and how it grows up from the mud to blossom in the sunshine every day. The lotus is a perfect symbol for our own spiritual journey and why we must embrace the darkness and explore it for opportunities to heal our old wounds and transform our lives. The poems The Well of Grief and Self Portrait by David Whyte are featured in this episode. The Well of Grief by David Whyte Those who will not slip beneath the still surfac...

It's challenging when we feel despair or depression hovering around us and we don't really know why it's there. But, like Rumi's poem The Guest House, it's important to welcome in even the feelings we don't like and wish would leave us alone. So today I'm recommitting to accepting my own despair and letting it in the door. I'll stop rejecting this down time, allow it to be present, and receive whatever it has to teach me. I'll also stop judging myself for wanting to push away the negative feelin...

In this episode I share a simple model for how spiritual growth occurs based on the work of Fr. Richard Rohr: Order, Disorder, Reorder. We'll talk about each of these 3 stages and how to navigate them with a focus on finding a "thread" that carries you through each time of life, loving the life you have, and learning to cherish change and impermanence.

For the very first episode of this podcast I introduce you to the 7 lessons I learned from my hospice patients and wrote about in my books: 7 Lessons for Living from the Dying and The Journey from Ego to Soul. We'll be diving into each of these lessons in upcoming episodes but this is a brief overview to get you started. These lessons are the foundation of all the spiritual work I've been doing and I hope they will help you visualize your own journey to becoming the best person you can be, even ...

In this episode I discuss how our greatest tragedies can ultimately lead us to growth through the gift of grace. This is the lesson of Suffering, the first of the 7 lessons I learned from my hospice patients. This episode includes: How my father’s suicide changed the trajectory of my life. Why the remedy for pain is found “inside the pain” as Rumi wrote. There is no “other side” of the tunnel of grief. How our grief journey can only be viewed clearly in retrospect. How to “burn o...

In this episode I share how love can transform and heal our lives even during our last days. This episode includes: The story of my “Love Project”. The importance of love for those at the end of life. How forgiveness makes room for even greater love. The many ways love can break our hearts. Why we need to remain open to love even after we have been hurt. The “violin metaphor” and why we should allow love to hollow us out. Practices for opening to love. Learn more about the...

Learn the importance of forgiveness for moving forward in society, personal life, and spiritual growth. This episode includes: Why there is so much outrage in our society today. Why we need to remember our interconnectedness and interdependence in order to solve the problems we are facing, How hospice patients focus on forgiveness as they face the end of life, How forgiveness benefits health, relationships and spiritual growth. Why forgiveness should be an intentional, daily practic...

Learn how to make the most of the present moment and give the gift of presence to those you love. This episode includes: Presence is an essential skill for working with dying patients. Many dying patients seem to have a new-found ability to focus on the present and appreciate each moment. According to Buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hahn presence is the ability to align body, mind, spirit, emotions in a single focus on the here and now. Being fully present with a patient or a loved one allows...