Episodes

In this episode I'm sharing two practices from the Greater Good Science Center I've been working with to improve conflict in my relationships and I hope they are helpful to you too: taking a 3rd person perspective and making an effective apology. This episode includes: Why it helps to take a bigger perspective during a conflict. How to use deep breathing to stay calm during an argument. Why you need to become vulnerable to improve your conflicts. How making an apology is helpful during a con...

Today I'm sharing with you a piece of the journey I am currently walking with a friend who has received a terminal diagnosis. I'm living the challenge of coping with bad news and want to share with my thoughts on how to get through these days and be a support to her while honoring my own process. Here are some of the things that have occurred to me so far: Feel my own pain. Find my own support. Be present but allow space. Sit with the uncertainty. Manage both the darkness and the laughter. ...

In today's episode I'm considering one of the most challenging of all the questions people Google about life: Why do we die? This questions has been considered by poets, philosophers, scientists, sociologists and seekers throughout the age of humankind. But there is no answer to this question. Instead I talk about how we learn to live with the knowledge that we are mortal and share two poems that offer helpful perspectives. I hope you enjoy it!

In this episode I'm addressing another of the most frequently Googled questions about life: Is Karma real? I explore how my lower egoic self views Karma (and really, really wants it to be real) and also an alternative view of Karma from a higher perspective. This episode includes: The meaning of Karma in Hinduism and Buddhism. Why the ego clings to the simplistic cause and effect idea of Karma. How using Karma as an explanation for seemingly bad or good things that happen in life can be harmf...

In this episode I talk about the true meaning of integrity and why it may be harder to achieve than we realize. Yet integrity (or wholeness) is necessary if we really want to bring about change in the world. Why we need to look at our own Shadow if we want to act with greater integrity. How our own hidden issues can sabotage our attempts to behave with integrity. Why exploring the Shadow is necessary if we want to grow in consciousness. To become integrated (at the Integral level of consciou...

Today I'm answering two more questions about life from those are most frequently searched on Google: What is knowledge? and What is wisdom? It's important to know the difference and to learn how to increase your wisdom throughout life, since our society seems to be lacking in genuine wisdom right now. This episode includes: Knowledge expands and changes over time. We have to be careful of false knowledge that can lead us astray. Wisdom is only learned through the experiences of life (usually ...

Today let's talk about uncertainty since it is surrounding us in the world right now. Not only are we still coping with the pandemic that has stressed us for 2 years but now there is war occurring in Ukraine and a potential threat of nuclear war that could affect all of us. These are challenging times and we need to know how to rise above them, since life is actually always uncertain--we just are not always aware of that fact. Here are some tools for coping that I talk about in this episode: St...

In this episode I'm discussing another frequently searched for question about life: How can I be a better person? This is big and important and also something we can (and should) spend our entire lives working on. Here is a simple (but not easy) way of looking at some tasks to consider as you work toward being a better person. This nomenclature comes from Ken Wilber's Integral Theory but I've put my own spin on these 4 things: Wake Up - recognize that you are more than just your ego. Grow Up -...

In this episode I talk about my own recent musings over whether or not I'm actually doing what I'm supposed to be doing and why that's a universal and unanswerable question! I had to remind myself of my own writings about Purpose and review how to stay focused on the "inner purpose" of life. This episode includes: The difference between inner and outer purpose. Why we need to focus on our inner purpose first in order to ensure that our outer purpose aligns with the highest good. Practices to ...

As we begin our 3rd year of the COVID pandemic, many of us are undoubtedly feeling emotionally exhausted and lacking in empathy for other people who are suffering right now. But empathy is essential if we want to navigate our journeys here and keep growing spiritually. So we'll look at some tips for improving and expanding our ability to empathize with others who are experiencing difficulties. This episode includes: The definition of empathy. How empathy and compassion differ from one another....

In this episode I take a look at one of the most frequently searched questions about life according to Google: How to pray. Apparently searches regarding prayer have skyrocketed during the pandemic as people look for ways to deal with fear and uncertainty. I share how I view prayer as a non-religious person and my own personal practice plus some information on why prayer is a practice worth considering. This episode includes: Studies on the benefits of prayer. Why you don't have to be religiou...

In this episode I consider the 3rd question of those that people most frequently Google about life: How do I forgive? This is an important that signals the timing is right for some healing and growth to occur if you feel motivated to forgive. Here are some things you should know as you start to work on forgiveness: Have a mindset that you are willing to move on from the past and no longer want to carry a load of resentment and pain from the past. Acknowledge that harm has been done to you and ...

In this episode I'll discuss my current project to declutter my house and how it's forcing me to deal with the balance between holding on to things and letting go. This turns out to be an important issue spiritually. This episode includes: The ego is primarily interested in holding onto things (especially power and control). Spiritual growth involves training the ego to let go. But sometimes holding on is what is needed and the timing matters a great deal. How I've found the balance between ...

Today I'm reflecting on another of the most common questions about life that people ask Google: How do I find love? While most people are probably searching for romantic love and wondering what is the best dating app to use, I'm talking about the much bigger picture of Divine, universal, creative love and some of the work I'm doing in my life to increase my ability to give and receive love (which is what we came here to do!) This episode includes: We already carry love within us (in fact we are...

In this episode I'll briefly share some ideas for non-material gifts you can "give" yourself to help make the holiday more meaningful and less hectic and exhausting. This is part of my own journey to get better at self-care so I'm sharing it with you as I try to learn how to do it myself. There won't be an episode next week because I'm taking the week off to enjoy the holidays (self-care!!) so I'll see you next time in 2022! This episode includes 6 gifts you should try to give yourself this year...

In this episode I talk about another pressing question we all deal with about life: how do we find happiness? I'm definitely not an expert on happiness but I have spent much of my life wishing I could be a happier person. So I'll share some poems and Rumi quotes with you and some stories of my own quest for happiness. Here are some of the things I've learned: Don't compare yourself to others. Trust happiness to come when you are ready. Happiness is an inside job so do your inner work. Savor ...

In this episode I talk about the perennial question of life: Why do bad things happen (to ALL people - not just good people.) It's important that we talk about this because we need to develop a mindset that helps us when unwanted things do happen in our lives. This episode includes: The Parable of the Chinese Farmer and how some things that appear to be "bad" can actually turn out to be "good" in the end (and vice versa.) Why we should learn not to label events in our lives as bad or good and ...

In this quick episode I share what I'm learning right now and how I'm planning ahead to have a healthy and low-stress holiday season this year (wish me luck!) But to do that I have to work on setting better boundaries and honoring my own needs, which is what I'm working on. I hope you have a healthy and happy holiday season too! Remember to plan ahead, set clear priorities, communicate your needs and focus on the things that you enjoy most! Watch my 1-hour presentation on Self-Care for the Holi...

In this episode I share some quotes and poems about gratitude in honor of Thanksgiving Day in the US. If you live elsewhere I hope you'll also take a moment to be thankful and to commit to making gratitude a daily practice as part of your Shadow work. This episode includes: Why we need to give thanks even if we can't see anything positive around or within us. How the intentional practice of gratitude helps "clean the window" through which we view life and adds more clarity, peace and order to ...

In part 4 of the series on the Shadow I talk about the collective Shadow and why we need to work on our own internal pain before we can begin to heal the problems of the world that are external to us. Be sure to listen to the previous 3 episodes on Shadow if you haven't already done so! This episode includes: The collective Shadow is becoming more apparent now as evidenced by the increasing awareness in society of racism, homophobia, misogyny, genocide, mistreating the planet, and all the other...

In this episode we continue to look at Shadow and how we can begin to heal our own individual wounds and traumas that are hidden away from view. Remember that this is the most important work you can do if you want to grow spiritually and to increase your capacity for love. This episode includes Ken Wilber's 3-2-1 Process for working on the Shadow and I'll walk you through each step with an example from my own life. Be sure to start by listening to Episodes 32 and 33 to get the background you'll ...

In this episode I talk about some simple ways you can begin to get in touch with your own shadow issues so that you can heal and reintegrate them. This is an essential first step in doing shadow work because "you don't know what you don't know." These 4 suggestions will help you explore and analyze the ways your shadow reveals itself in your day-to-day life, which will be tremendously helpful as you move forward with healing work that leads to your spiritual growth. These 4 suggestions are: Exa...

In this episode I discuss the Shadow aspect of the ego or lower self and why the spiritual journey requires us to delve into all the pain and wounds that are stored there. Our Western society shuns the idea of the Shadow and rejects all failure, weakness and loss. But the "shadowlands" as Richard Rohr writes "are good and necessary teachers." So let's look within on our spiritual journey and begin the task of healing what has been relegated to the shadows. This episode includes: Metaphors for t...

In this episode I talk about the merging of my end-of-life studies with my spiritual practice and why the two are inextricably linked together. Through the writings of Carl Jung and Ken Wilber it is clear that there is a time in life for many of us when our focus turns inward, toward our spiritual growth rather than toward success in the external world. That shift often occurs suddenly when we become aware of our own mortality or can happen after a consciousness-expanding experience such as taki...