AS:029 Inspiring: The Speaker who can't talk right

Welcome to the Accessibility Solutions Podcast hosted by Linda Hunt, an award winning accessibility consultant, speaker, and author. With over 30 years experience in senior management rules and indeed passion for creating inclusive environments, Linda brings us unmatched expertise and credibility to our discussions. Join us as we explore the Transformative Power of accessibility and inclusion in today's world. Through captivating conversations, Linda shares her wealth of knowledge, provides practical solutions, and sheds light on the latest trends and investments in the field. Whether you're a business owner or disability advocate, or simply curious about the world of accessibility, this podcast is your go to resource. Get ready to unlock new perspectives, breakdown barriers, and embark on a journey of empowerment. Are you ready to create a more inclusive world? Let's begin. Welcome to the Accessibility Solutions Podcast.

So welcome listeners to the Accessibility Solutions podcast. I am so pleased today to have with me Raja Vaidya. Raja has a talk titled "Move from White Belt Mind Lock to Black Belt MindShift”. I met Raja probably about a year ago. I was a guest on his podcast. So Raja is a kickboxing opera singer, cancer scientist, scientist from Philadelphia who can't talk right. And Raja is gonna share his story with us, but he's just shared with me that he is coming up on 300 either solo episodes that he's produced or three or stages that he is spoken on. So Raja, why don't you give us who can't speak, right, what that technically means and where we go from there, how it ties into accessibility and making the world accessible?

Certainly because I grew up with a, with a pretty severe stutter. And it's only in recent years that I really kind of come to grips with it and acknowledge it and accept it. Because for my whole life, I was ashamed of it. I did think specifically, so I didn't have to talk. I joined a choir and sang an opera, so I didn't have to talk. I took karate, so I didn't have to talk. I got a job as a cancer research scientist for 25 years, so I didn't have to talk. So, and it wasn't until maybe six years ago that when we talk about Dei, like, we talk about adversity and accessibility in the workplace, people with speechless fluences are almost to me, I feel as kind of like the unspoken handicap people forget about us because we don't talk much generally. And so, and this all, this all came to a point about six years ago when in 2017, I was finishing up this big project for 6 months in my research job. And then my partner, she ended up doing the presentation. I asked if I could present part of it. They said, no, no, it's okay, she can do it. She leaves my name off the front slide of the whole slide deck, even though half the slides up there were mine. And you know, so it made it look like I did 5% of the work. And to add insult to injury, I actually got injured during that. I hurt both of my rotator cuffs, my shoulders, and I was in physical therapy for a year, and she got a promotion out of it, and I did not, so I can forgive, but I decided to pivot and to face my fear of speaking. And I was thinking how do I do that, and I'm too old to learn a new trick now.

And so I found ToastMasters, which is a non profit group that helps you learn speaking as well as leadership skills. So I faced my fear, started forcing myself to speak more and practice more, and now I can't get enough of it. NowI've done a TEDx, I wrote two books, I've given talks in front of 8,000 people. I have, you know, I've gone on, I don't know how many podcasts and YouTube channels and shows.And, it's been what an amazing ride. And I started all this maybe just a little over a year ago after I finally got the confidence that, you know, let me go out and try something outside of toastmasters too. Maybe I can just do an independent competition. So there was an ultimate speaker competition that came to Philadelphia that travels around the country. And I went in there with 3 hours of sleep and no coffee because I left. I made coffee that morning and I forgot it. And I said, alright, I'll just mingle with people and make connections.

And instead I passed the first round, second round, third round and ended up with third place in the Ultimate Speaker Competition Philadelphia. That was in July last year. So in August, I decided to try to face my fear of speaking live and say, alright, I'm gonna interview people now on my client show. So I was just doing general entrepreneur training for my clients as part of Victory Mindset Academy. You see behind me. And so once I started interviewing people, I had to get good at it. So I Learned and practiced and pushed myself, and I threw down the gauntlet, said, all right, I'm going, I have to go over this fear of speaking live, so I'm going to do 100 interviews in six months or less. Well, that didn't happen. Instead I got 204 in five months. So I crushed it. And now, as you said earlier, Linda, in two weeks I hit 300 interviews and it really just reflects that ideal that we don't know how powerful you are until we try.

Yeah, and I certainly can really understand, yeah, that concept of overcoming a fear. So for example, I'm a power wheelchair user and I have had my mantra for the past 25 years since I was diagnosed with MS, has been “adapt”. So if I can't do something one way, how can I do it? It still accomplishes the task.

I love that you pointed that out, yeah, pointed that out.

But as you said, it's challenging yourself and making lemonade out of lemons, for lack of a better word. I mean, it's really absolutely challenging yourself to be able to do something, even though it's outside your comfort zone. So for you with a stutter as you said that you had, kind of, shied away from speaking your entire life, and then doing that pivot and, and coming up to 300 public speaking engagements. I mean, what an accomplishment, that's an accomplishment, yeah, that's accomplishment for anybody, regardless of their speaking ability to land 300 speaking gigs in 18 months. So, you know, outside of doing it with a disability regarding your speaking. That's a major accomplishment for anyone, so really, really, and

For your audience don't realize that, you know, I used to be ashamed of it. And finally I left my last company that I was there for 15 years, where all that happened my, started my new company this year. I finally put down for the first time in my life. I have a disability. And, and it finally feels like I can finally breathe and say, you know what? I'm okay. This is normal. And I want people to realize that people have speechless fluency or any sort of a, nor diverse or different any sort of physical challenge, mentally diverse challenge. it's normal, you know, we have, we are the rainbow of people, you know, that make that all comprise humanity.

Well, exactly, and I mean, we, you know, we're talking 22% of the population attendifies, this is having this form of a disability. I mean, that's, yeah you know like, we're talking about one in four people here. And we all, we all work, we all shop, we all go to restaurants, we all, you know, we all do everything that everyone regardless of their ability does. And so further to be no barriers to us being able to do that. So whether it's, you know, the barrier, so whether it's a barrier to employment, and as you said, you, you know, you always found in an employment situation that you would not speak up because of your disability, and basically were, well, will say penalized marginalized, marginalized, and, and not recognized for the work that you did. Because that disability is just, is so unfair.

I mean, they didn't promote me for 10 years, and when, when you look back, and you think that of my greatest thing that makes no sense, someone who's highly talented, highly motivated and likes people. I'm a people person, I love people, you know, I think the worst job for me is, like, when I had to work in the basement of a lab, and I can barely interact with anybody, cause I just grind out data and bring it out. I'm like, oh, I felt like I was in, like, a dungeon. You know, I was getting all depressed. I was getting seasonal affective disorder because I couldn't see sunshine. It was terrible, you know, so I like people, I like sunshine. I like, you know, to interact and meet new people. And, and honestly, everybody I meet, like, who's in a different, you know, experience in life. Guess what? They bring something new to table, cause they bring a different perspective than maybe you hadn't thought of.

Exactly. That's it, you know, where we all have gifts to give regardless of, regardless of some challenge we may be facing in our life. And, you know what? Everyone, regardless of whether it's a disability or not, is facing some power we don't know anything about necessarily and being able to. So I really gotta, really gotta commend you on, you know, really stepping into your power, regardless of your disability, and just making that decision that you were gonna basically get out of your own way and start.

Yeah, because I gotta tell you something else too. Like, when I was younger, when I was 16 years old because of karate, I trained six days a week, four five hours a day because I wanted to change my life. When I was 16 years old, I made it to the World Championships and I placed. I took home two 2 medals. So I made a two year plan to compete in the Olympic trials.

So three months after my 18th birthday, two years later, I entered a major East Coast qualifier, and I beat out 400 other black belts. Three months after my 18th birthday, and I made the Olympic team. And I decided then, you know what, I can't go because , no one's gonna respect a guy with a stutter. You know, I didn't go. I lost my one chance to go to the Olympics. Wow, because of my own fear of what my disability meant in my own head. And I love how you said earlier, you can do so many other things. Like, I used to think out of 10,000 things, I could only do 10. And now I realize, you know what? I had it backwards. I was an upside down pyramid that I actually can do 9,990. And maybe there's 10 things a person with a speech issue may not be able to do. Maybe I can't be an air traffic controller, maybe I can't be a professional auctioneer. That's okay. Yeah, I don't mind. There's 9,998 other things I can do in my life. I never thought that I'd be a world champion, master black belter. I have a sixth degree, and next year I'm gonna get my seventh degree with 40 years of martial arts experience and become a grandmaster. And I've been in a movie. I'm in the black but hall of Fame. I'm in a comic book series called The Martialist. How did all this happen in the past five years? Because I finally accepted who I am. And all of you out there that have any sort of, I want to say you have a disability, you have a different ability, and all that means is that maybe there's 10 things out of 10,000 that you might not be able to do or might be a little bit more difficult. You can still do it. Yeah, it's not impossible, it's just gonna be a little bit harder to do.

Yeah, I challenge you to find what's the worst thing that you think you can't do and go try it. Yeah, I've got to agree, I talk all the time. I mean, my feature talk is adapting the power of a positive attitude, been dealing with a chronic illness. And it really, it's that power of positive attitude which you obviously have in spades. And it's that concept that, you know, so wide out of 10,000 things or might be 10 that you, you can't do me, I am never gonna run a Marathon. I could probably, I could probably wheel some kind of a Marathon as a power wheelchair user, but I'm not gonna be able to run a Marathon. I'm not gonna be able to climb a flight of stairs, even a flight of six stairs. That, you know, that doesn't stop me from getting around. It doesn't stop me from doing that. Probably the biggest thing that I decided that I would not give up when my disability progressed to the point where I was gonna get in a wheelchair is that I would not give up driving. And so that meant I had to go out and I had to get myself a wheelchair ramp van and so that I could drive my wheelchair right into the driver's seat and I could still drive. And that was 14 years ago and here we are, you know, here we are today. So I mean, I could have been one of those people that said, oh, now I'm in a wheelchair and I can't drive, so I need to, you know, take a wheelchair taxi anywhere I go or whatever. But I didn't. And here we are 14 years later. I actually finally just two months ago got a new wheelchair van because I've decided I'm going to continue driving. And yeah, so that's something I'm not willing to give up as a result of my disability. So I really commend you on your work. Like I said, 300 speaking engagements is an amazing feat for anyone I was. As we said her, I'm very pleased to have been on your show a year or so ago and

You're part of my Power 300 now.

Yeah, perfect. Well, I'm so glad that I was able to get you on, on our show so that we could talk about, you know, really the the, just that, that concept of adapting, that your disability, whatever it is, does not define you and does not, does not hold you back from accomplishing whatever it is that you want to accomplish. I think that's a really powerful message.

I know it's funny now, like in a few months I turned 50, I turned 50, I don't feel it at all. And I've because of changing my mindset the past six years, like I was in a bad car accident years ago, I had gained 70 pounds. It took me six years of failing and trying. Every single day possible. Didn't work until last year. I started changing up the way that I saw myself in the way I was doing things. And I stopped dieting and I started just living healthy the way that I knew I should. As a black belt competitor like I used to be. Guess what? The weight just came off 48 pounds down in 52 weeks. And I got, and I'm gonna get the last 20 pounds down. And by the time I hit 50 now I've already done a Ted X I have two books on my Times Square billboard. Like all these things that happened the past five to seven years because I changed and I decided to pivot and face the biggest fear of my life. And that really was the one thing that was keeping me boxed in. So my next book is gonna be called Unbox Me Today. So it's not just a title, it's a call to action. Yes. And so because a lot of us kind of feel trapped in this box of fear that had been made by society, by our parents, by our disability, by our friends, our family, our coworkers, and, you know, those pitiful stares of people, oh, you poor thing, I don't want that, I never wanted to end anybody's pity. What I want is their respect and just be treated as equal to the same standard. And when I tried to do a Toastmaster speech for the competition and I went over by one second and I got disqualified, I thanked them afterward and said thank you for not, you know, pandering to me and giving me extra time. Yeah, I wanted the same time limit as everybody else. Thank you for that. I Learned,I have to find another way to improve my speaking and my timing, and then I did.

Yeah, and so they gave you the respect, but you earned the respect, you earned that respect, bye, you know, agreeing to participate and not asking for any special accommodations as a result of that. So, and I, like, I just heard earlier today the word fear, and, and so turning that word fear into facing everything and rising, yeah, out of, instead of fear which a lot of people feel. So that's really something that resonated with me when I heard it earlier. Today was to really face your

Everything will rise, yeah, face, and I've been saying that for a gosh at least a year and a half now. And, you know, I think everybody else has been saying, you know, fear stands for a false evidence appearing real, which is fine. I love my version face everything arise, yeah, because it just, it's more of a proactive versus a reactive.

Response to me earlier that I was gonna, I'm gonna get that, put it off on my bulletin board in my office, face everything and rise.

Yeah, you can quote me. Yeah, and the other thing I say to everybody is this, this, don't fake it till you make it, believe it, and become it perfect. Yeah, great ways. Every champion, every successful story, they were champions in their own mind before everybody else believed it. You know, you are allowed to believe in your success before everybody else. In fact, you should, because no one's gonna believe it at the same time as you. They will catch up to you, but right now, if you think, you know, whether you're in a wheelchair, or you're a paraplegic, or you have other issues, or I don't know what if I, like, my son's on the ASD spectrum, and I did catch myself when he was 10 years old. He wrote a little horror story or his class that was supposed to be a little short page, like one page short story, and he turned it into this 10 page double sided, like, a horror novel, and it knocked my socks off. I was like, wow, this is amazing, Evan.

That's, that's a great class project, and says, no, daddy, I think I wanna become a horror story author. I said, no, Evan, you're not gonna make any money on that. Don't do that. No no no no no, no. And then I caught myself. The next day, Mike, what am I doing? I just crushed his dream. I just restricted him. What the same thing that people used to do to me. I went back to him the next day, said, you know what? Evan, I thought your story was incredible. And if you wanna be an author and you wanna write horror stories, you go for it. I want you to be the best at it, and I will support you every step of the way. All of a sudden, he lit up. And now a couple years later, he has three books that he has as part of a trilogy that he wants to write. He's making up his whole backstory and this underverse and multiverse kind of theory with his the, with the creatures that are involved in the story. And it's gonna be called the shadows. Oh wow. And I'm more proud about him than anything I've done because I caught myself and I stopped myself from restricting him because he believed him himself. He believed that he could be a champion before everyone else realized it. It took me a day to realize it in him too. So now I do the same thing with my daughter too, is that you can do anything you want. She want to play soccer, but then she wanted to join that. She didn't think she could cheer. I told her, yes, she can, and I let her, and and then, and now she's so much happier. She has a whole bunch of new friends and now it's helping out with her soccer too. So all these things that it all starts in here, and it doesn't matter what you're doing, you know, believe first. Believe in yourself, cause everybody else will catch up later, but believe and just move forward.

Well, that's a, I think a wonderful, wonderful way for us to wrap up. I, I wanna thank you so much for joining me on the show, and what an inspirational story. Those of you, thank you for tuning in and listening to this episode. If anything that Raja or I have said resonates with you, please feel free to leave us a review on this episode. Pass this episode on to someone else that you may feel will get some value from it, and until next time, thanks for joining us. Raja: thanks for joining me, and until next time, everyone, cheers.

Thank you for joining us on the Accessibility Solutions podcast hosted by Linda Hunt.

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