March 2, 2025

S2E2-Ain't Nobody Got Time For That-Special Guest Aaron Chapman, MD

S2E2-Ain't Nobody Got Time For That-Special Guest Aaron Chapman, MD
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Season 2
Our Favorite Segment-Ain't Nobody Got Time For That with out SPECIAL GUEST, Aaron Chapman, MD. Aaron is our very first "Three Times A Charm" guest and he has joined us again. We discuss everything from how we meet and mingle in todays world, are 'apps' replacing social skills? What advice would you give your younger self? What does retirement look like? Is 60 just a number or is aging traumatic regardless of when it takes place? Not to worry, Don & Gary are ready to navigate the world at........THIS AGE with you. Watch YouTube http://www.youtube.com/ at Pafifer-Pod Listen Apple Podcasts Spotify Instagram @donandgarydoin60 Contact us at Donandgarydoin60@gmail.com ALL THE SOCIALS and PODCASTS BELOW https://linktr.ee/PafiferPodcastProductions
WEBVTT

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Hi, Gary, Good morning, done.

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I'm good, Happy Sunday. Guess what I'm doing today, I'm

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making bagels. Yes, well, we'll see, because I've got guests

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from Brooklyn staying with us who tell me that there's

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no way that I can create a bagel that will

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rival a New York bagel.

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So you don't know what proved them wrong or what.

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I'm going to try and prove them wrong. If not,

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I will poison them and they'll never be able to

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tell how bad the bagel.

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It'll be the.

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Last bagel they have listeners and watchers. We are back

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and we have a special guest with us today. If

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you know us from three p's, you might recognize the

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name Aaron Chapman. He not only joined us once, he

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joined us twice in his professional capacity as a board

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certified psychiatrist. In some of our episodes on three p's

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we tackled some more serious conversations. One was on mental

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health and one was on gender identity, and Aaron was

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kind of enough to join us in a professional capacity

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to guide us through that. So thank you Erin for

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joining us. Now you're the only person who has crossed

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over and been a guest on both podcasts, So I

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think acause.

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I'm honored to thank you for the invitation.

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Again, well, we have an ulterior motive because this podcast

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is called Don and Gary Doing sixty. But apparently we

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aren't the only ones who are doing sixty. Shut up,

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there are others. And when we got together several months ago,

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we were actually in between our birthdays. I had just

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had my birthday, yours was about to happen, and then

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just you know, Don's is a few weeks after yours,

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allegedly area But Don and I turned sixty a couple

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of years ago, so I'm going to just jump right

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into it, and well, welcome to the club.

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You are now of the sixties.

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My birthday did happen as they tend to, and I'm

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now sixty.

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And how did that go from that transition from fifty

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nine being one day and then then you wake up

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the next morning and you're sixty?

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You know, I think for me it was a non event,

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and it's not the first time that I've done this.

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Maybe it's just something in my own personality how I

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prepare myself for these things.

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But I've been.

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Thinking about myself referring to myself as sixty. You know,

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at least for six months before the actual date. So

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when the actual date happened, it wasn't this big mental

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shift of oh my god, I'm now sixty. It just

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was the realization of something that I had been kind

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of incorporating processing for quite some time, thinking about myself

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as being sixty.

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And did that happen with other milestone birthdays as well?

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It has? It has, And it's not something that I

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choose to do.

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It's not, you know, it's not like, Okay, you know

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it's June, now you should really start thinking about yourself

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as fifty or sixty.

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It's just kind of the way I've handled it.

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Right, Yeah, Because definitely there are people who whatever the

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age is, have an issue with it or you know,

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thinking things are gonna shift, and it's I've never had

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that issues. I think it's more in your attitude and

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how you live your life and you know, being positive

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about it. And the reality is that it happens everyone, right,

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Everyone is true ages, right, So it's not like it's

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only happening to you. So that gives me solace.

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I mean, it also helps that I made some wonderful

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plans around turning sixty. Some of my favorite things like

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traveling and eating. So I actually turned sixty in Paris, France,

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nothing wrong with that. Had a wonderful dinner that night,

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you know, thanks to my husband in Paris, France. Right, So,

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you know, planning, you know, just some milestone activities you know,

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around that date. I think we're also helpful in terms

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of making it more enjoyable than you know, something to dread.

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Yeah, I did something similar. From my fortieth I went

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to Europe. From my fiftieth, we went to Italy and

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my sixth table was a party here. But yeah, but yeah,

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you celebrate it, you know, and include your family and

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friends and loved ones.

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So well, Aaron, I have a question, because if I could,

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it's now sixties. It's just a number for all of us.

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It's literally just a frickin' number. Who cares. But it's

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interesting how much weight is put upon a number in

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our society, you know, just in general, because it's like

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one of those things where you're not really considered middle

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aged anymore at sixty, because we're not going to be

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around twenty. No, But I'm saying, you know, it's interesting

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to lose that because you know, in many most so

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you know, we're considered old. Like a lot of people say, well,

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that's old. It's like, you know, I don't feel old.

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I don't feel a whole lot different than I did

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in my forties or fifties. So how about you? Are

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you feeling good? Are you feeling it seems like you're

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doing well?

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Right? You know, I feel good. I'm doing well.

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If you're asking that, you know, just so sort of

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from a very practical you know, physical you know angle.

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But but I I agree with you one hundred percent.

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I mean, do I feel like a different person energy wise?

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In well?

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I mean, of course your interests change, but just how

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I you know, how I'm approaching you know, the world,

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how I'm approaching life. You know, do I feel that different,

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you know now having turned sixty than I did when

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I turned forty or fifty. I don't, you know, I

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I think I don't feel that different. Good good meals,

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maybe different perspectives.

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People trying to tend to label numbers and label people

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with the number and make so many assumptions about you know, well,

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maybe you shouldn't be doing that, Maybe you shouldn't be

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going to Paris, or maybe you shouldn't be climbing Mount

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Everest or maybe you shouldn't be taking you know, that

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long trip because you're ex age. And it's like, I mean,

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there's got to be a way to dispell that. Obviously

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by living our lives positively with a lot of forward momentum.

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All those things are very important to do, but it's

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so many people, so many people just tend to label

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on it. It just seems like it's almost a burden to

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have that label on it, and it's like having to

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disprove it in some way by being vital.

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Yeah, and I can see we're in my own mind

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that that frame shifts over time. So you know, now

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I'll start having those thoughts about someone in their eighties. Oh,

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that person's in their eighties. You know that vacation's going

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to involve a lot of walking, do you think? And

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I don't think of that so much, you know, for

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someone in their sixties or for me in particular, but

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to have that awareness that, you know, other people's frame

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of reference is quite different than where mine is right now.

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Right, I'm just thinking like the millennials that are around,

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because I've got a like a house gift. Who's my

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sister in laws daughter, who's in her very early thirties,

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and I ask her so many questions about this because

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you know, you know, is they're very connected in a

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different way to social media or to how they process

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a lot of things, and it's a very interesting thing

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to get their perspective on what they think this is

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supposed to be. Luckily, she's very open minded and she's

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you know, she sees how vital we are. So I mean,

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I think it's important that also, you kind of it's

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kind of good to get a perspective from a younger person.

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And of course, you know, thirties, they're literally half our age.

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What were we doing in our thirties And it's a

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very different world right now for them. Absolutely, sorry Gary

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to mean to interruptew no, no, no, no, no.

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I just wanted to pick up on something that Aaron mentioned.

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Was he mentioned his husband, So you are you still

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consider newly weed? How long don't you get married?

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Well, I'm not sure. We're yeah, sure, let's call us newlyweds. Yeah,

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we got married in May. So it's been a little

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more than six months. Okay, you know, so that that

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is probably a change since the last time I was

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on one of your podcasts. Yes, and you know this.

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This is number two for me, it's number one for him. Okay,

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but but yeah, it's a significant life change and probably

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you know, one that people don't necessarily associate with the

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age of fifty.

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Nine, right, yeah, but big year for you. Then twenty

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twenty four.

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My goodness, it was wow.

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But so, how long ago did you meet?

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Darren and I met?

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You know, it's we met right before the world shut

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down in twenty twenty. Okay, we did meet online.

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We had perhaps had five dates.

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We met in the end of January of twenty twenty,

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but I had some vacation plans and he had some

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vacation plans separate from each other, with our own friends,

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and you know, so maybe by the time, you know,

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they said, you know, the world is shutting down and

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you shouldn't spend time with anyone outside of your household.

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We had maybe had five dates, and we even did

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have the conversation we reflect with each other. We had

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the conversation of maybe we shouldn't do this anymore, because

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you know, I don't know who you're seeing. You don't

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know who I'm seeing. We don't live in the same household.

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And then at a certain point we stopped doing that,

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and we just thought, you know what, why don't we

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you know, I'm not seeing anyone, he's not seeing anyone.

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Why don't we just sort of figure this out as

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a bubble.

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Yeah, and so we became each other's bubble, really kind

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of not knowing each other very well, to be honest.

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But here we are, you know, moving into six years

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later and we're now newlyweds.

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Wow.

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Well, congratulation. Although I did see you, you know after.

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You got yes, yeah, Okay.

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A couple of questions about that. Since you you bubbled together,

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does that mean you cohabitated or you were you were

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each other's bubble and you could intermingle that way.

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We did not cohabitate, you know.

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One of those weird things that happens, you know, when

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you meet someone and start a relationship and get married

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at fifty nine, is you know, ideally it's you know,

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two people who kind of have their settled life and

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their stable life outside of this coming together and you know,

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I have my home, he has his home, and you

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know we we didn't give that up.

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Okay, So did you share sour doughs starters to start?

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Did you do that?

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The answer to that question is yes.

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And well, what was the other thing? Did you learn

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how to do cocktails together? Did you do learn a

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lot of.

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New I'm not sure that we learned new cocktails, but

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we certainly had our.

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Share of cocktails that's good.

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And we had our share of Zoom happy hours with

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this friends, Zoom happy hours with my friends.

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Okay, and one more quick one if I could. Gary,

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I'm sorry because now I kind of I don't know

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it was.

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It's called the Don and Gary show you.

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I'm trying to make it more Don and a little

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less Gary. Ah, Happy New Year, Just kidding, just kidding.

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The other thing I was going to ask you, though,

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is you mentioned that you'd met each other on the apps.

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And I have to say, for our for us in

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our age group, that's not how it all started.

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For us.

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Back in our twenties and thirties, the.

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Apps weren't around.

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And I'm going to say the new all the kids

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are doing the apps and basically that's how they're doing

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the apps. So was it because I mean, you know,

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we used to go out. We would go to a

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happy hour, you go to a bar, a restaurant, whatever,

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You'd meet people that way. And the reason why I

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bring this up is because do you remember cruising? What

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cruising was? There is?

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Do I remember? Do I remember professionals?

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But you know, kind of something that came up, and

236
00:13:03.919 --> 00:13:05.840
something I was reading about recently was that the art

237
00:13:05.879 --> 00:13:09.000
of that is gone now because they're actually gone. One,

238
00:13:09.320 --> 00:13:12.759
there are a lot fewer spaces for people to go

239
00:13:12.799 --> 00:13:16.240
and do that. Two, you know, generations have shifted, and

240
00:13:16.279 --> 00:13:18.559
now the apps have basically taken over on how people

241
00:13:18.639 --> 00:13:21.879
can meet one another. So it's interesting how some of

242
00:13:21.919 --> 00:13:26.799
that intermingling and community has been taken away from us

243
00:13:26.840 --> 00:13:28.840
or changed. I won't say it's been taken away because

244
00:13:28.840 --> 00:13:31.919
there's still places to go, but it's not nearly the

245
00:13:31.919 --> 00:13:34.960
same game that it was twenty years ago.

246
00:13:37.080 --> 00:13:37.960
I don't know.

247
00:13:38.039 --> 00:13:41.600
I've taken a different point of view on that, okay,

248
00:13:41.759 --> 00:13:48.960
And that you know, cruising has changed, and now you know,

249
00:13:49.320 --> 00:13:53.039
what is what people are doing online? You know what

250
00:13:53.200 --> 00:13:58.200
is what people are doing on Grinder and scruff, they're cruising.

251
00:13:59.320 --> 00:14:03.759
It's just it's just a different platform.

252
00:14:03.840 --> 00:14:06.639
It's a it's a you know, it's a different way

253
00:14:06.799 --> 00:14:09.159
of you know, essentially accomplishing the same goal.

254
00:14:11.919 --> 00:14:14.080
Well yeah, but cruising could also mean you're meeting someone

255
00:14:14.080 --> 00:14:18.159
you're not necessarily doing going right down to Sometimes it is,

256
00:14:18.759 --> 00:14:21.480
sometimes it isn't because sometimes actually I met my husband

257
00:14:21.600 --> 00:14:24.559
in a bar, you know, making that thing back across

258
00:14:24.600 --> 00:14:26.519
from each other face to face, and that was yep,

259
00:14:26.600 --> 00:14:30.080
you know, one hundred years ago. But now it's it's

260
00:14:30.120 --> 00:14:31.799
it seems like it's almost become so easy where you're

261
00:14:31.840 --> 00:14:35.360
just literally swiping through someone. You're going physicality first. Then

262
00:14:35.399 --> 00:14:37.000
you have to go through the process of what you

263
00:14:37.000 --> 00:14:40.039
did getting to know each other a bit, and that's

264
00:14:40.200 --> 00:14:42.559
that's a little more challenging. I think if you're doing

265
00:14:42.639 --> 00:14:44.519
it via phone, I'm not sure. I don't know how

266
00:14:44.519 --> 00:14:47.679
you did it specifically, but it's interesting how through the

267
00:14:47.720 --> 00:14:51.039
generations now it's changed dramatically. I do agree, there's still

268
00:14:51.080 --> 00:14:54.000
spaces to go to and still places to go and

269
00:14:54.039 --> 00:14:56.120
meet people like that. It just seems the majority of

270
00:14:56.120 --> 00:14:58.080
what's happening now is app driven.

271
00:14:59.759 --> 00:15:05.320
No, No, I absolutely agree with you. You know, I

272
00:15:05.360 --> 00:15:09.039
I mentioned that this this marriage is number two for

273
00:15:09.159 --> 00:15:11.759
me and I had been married.

274
00:15:11.519 --> 00:15:13.879
For fourteen years.

275
00:15:14.639 --> 00:15:21.000
Prior to that, and then kind of emerged from that

276
00:15:21.200 --> 00:15:28.159
relationship recently divorced into a completely different world of you know,

277
00:15:28.240 --> 00:15:32.080
how people meet, how people mingle. You know, what's the

278
00:15:32.080 --> 00:15:34.440
purpose of the bars? Why do people go to the

279
00:15:34.480 --> 00:15:40.480
bars versus you know, the purpose of the apps? And

280
00:15:40.879 --> 00:15:44.759
you know, I ran into a friend a bar friend,

281
00:15:45.399 --> 00:15:50.159
you know, after I'm emerging from my last relationship, someone

282
00:15:50.200 --> 00:15:53.039
who I used tonew know from the bars, you know,

283
00:15:53.159 --> 00:15:57.799
before my first relationship, and he was telling me, you know,

284
00:15:57.840 --> 00:16:00.120
and he was right that, you know, the bar the

285
00:16:00.120 --> 00:16:01.879
purpose of the bars have changed.

286
00:16:02.440 --> 00:16:04.519
You know that people you people don't.

287
00:16:04.279 --> 00:16:07.039
Go to the bars for the most part to meet

288
00:16:07.480 --> 00:16:10.240
They don't go to the bars to hook up, because

289
00:16:10.240 --> 00:16:13.039
you have the apps for that. People go to bars

290
00:16:13.120 --> 00:16:16.000
to meet up with their friends, hang out, debrief their week,

291
00:16:16.519 --> 00:16:19.720
and you know, and I think that's you know, I'm

292
00:16:19.720 --> 00:16:21.759
not going to say that that's one hundred percent accurate,

293
00:16:21.840 --> 00:16:24.200
but you know, I think there's a lot of accuracy

294
00:16:24.240 --> 00:16:24.480
to that.

295
00:16:24.600 --> 00:16:25.840
You know, people go to.

296
00:16:27.279 --> 00:16:29.960
You know, the bars here in San Francisco mostly with

297
00:16:30.159 --> 00:16:33.200
friends to hang out with their friends. And it's not

298
00:16:33.879 --> 00:16:37.919
you know, a cruising scene like it used to be.

299
00:16:40.799 --> 00:16:41.000
Sad.

300
00:16:41.039 --> 00:16:42.960
A question for the two of you, since you were

301
00:16:43.000 --> 00:16:46.320
both married, so don I'm going to have you do

302
00:16:46.399 --> 00:16:49.200
some math. How old were you when you got married?

303
00:16:50.679 --> 00:16:51.919
I know, the answer, but I s want to see

304
00:16:51.919 --> 00:16:52.240
if you do.

305
00:16:53.200 --> 00:16:56.320
Okay, Okay, it was very recently, so it was a

306
00:16:56.399 --> 00:17:00.840
couple of years ago. So I was sixty.

307
00:17:00.919 --> 00:17:02.559
Yes, good, good answer.

308
00:17:02.759 --> 00:17:05.519
Yes for Gary to confirm that, because I wasn't sure.

309
00:17:05.880 --> 00:17:09.799
Yes, so yes, but I was twenty twenty three, thank you.

310
00:17:10.160 --> 00:17:11.799
See if I rely on Gary for all of these

311
00:17:11.839 --> 00:17:15.400
pertinent needs because I don't remember a darn thing. But yeah,

312
00:17:15.440 --> 00:17:19.039
I mean, but we'd also been together twenty two years

313
00:17:19.039 --> 00:17:22.839
prior to that, so basically we caved because our families

314
00:17:22.839 --> 00:17:26.079
were saying, come on, what's your problem, get together already

315
00:17:26.920 --> 00:17:27.279
put a.

316
00:17:27.279 --> 00:17:27.799
Ring on it.

317
00:17:28.440 --> 00:17:28.960
Exactly.

318
00:17:29.160 --> 00:17:31.640
No, So my question the two of you, because Don

319
00:17:31.640 --> 00:17:37.759
you were sixty, Aaron you're fifty nine, so I didn't

320
00:17:37.759 --> 00:17:39.880
realize Aaron had been married before. How old were you

321
00:17:39.920 --> 00:17:41.119
when you got married the first time?

322
00:17:41.640 --> 00:17:42.240
Thirty five?

323
00:17:42.680 --> 00:17:45.200
Okay, which when I was what I was initial is

324
00:17:45.240 --> 00:17:48.599
going to say, was on average. It's like lay twenties

325
00:17:48.920 --> 00:17:52.480
to mid thirties was one. You know, guys usually getting married,

326
00:17:52.680 --> 00:17:57.000
well right, not all of us, but I digress. So

327
00:17:57.119 --> 00:18:00.000
the decision at fifty nine to sixty to get married

328
00:18:01.000 --> 00:18:02.680
just kind of walking through that. I mean, it's like

329
00:18:04.440 --> 00:18:05.119
how did that go?

330
00:18:05.279 --> 00:18:05.319
What?

331
00:18:05.480 --> 00:18:05.920
What is that?

332
00:18:06.079 --> 00:18:06.160
Like?

333
00:18:06.240 --> 00:18:09.039
I mean, is was that an easy decision or because

334
00:18:09.319 --> 00:18:13.000
at that point, you know, in Don's case, yes, you

335
00:18:13.039 --> 00:18:16.359
were together with with your husband for twenty plus years.

336
00:18:16.799 --> 00:18:19.720
But for someone who's thing like me, it's like you're

337
00:18:19.759 --> 00:18:23.119
set in your way. So at late fifties, early sixties,

338
00:18:23.160 --> 00:18:26.839
say I'm getting married, that's that's a that's a shift obviously,

339
00:18:28.119 --> 00:18:30.960
So I just wanted to kind of bring that up.

340
00:18:33.920 --> 00:18:34.359
Was it?

341
00:18:34.480 --> 00:18:38.039
I can't say it was an easy decision, you know,

342
00:18:38.079 --> 00:18:43.960
I think there were some practical elements to making that decision,

343
00:18:45.000 --> 00:18:49.000
and as well as you know, impractical reasons for making

344
00:18:49.000 --> 00:18:51.480
that decision, you know, having found someone who I love

345
00:18:51.640 --> 00:18:57.359
and who you know, I want to spend my life with.

346
00:18:58.640 --> 00:19:02.119
You know, when I say practical, you know, there are

347
00:19:02.119 --> 00:19:05.640
all kinds of you know, practical financial considerations in terms

348
00:19:05.640 --> 00:19:09.480
of setting setting myself up for retirement and setting ourselves

349
00:19:09.599 --> 00:19:12.480
up for you know, if we are planning on doing

350
00:19:12.480 --> 00:19:18.720
this together. You know, there are some elements of being

351
00:19:18.759 --> 00:19:23.720
married that stabilized that for you, so that that that's

352
00:19:23.759 --> 00:19:27.119
the stuff that was completely practical. I think on the

353
00:19:27.160 --> 00:19:30.119
impractical part, you know, I'd already done this before and

354
00:19:30.160 --> 00:19:32.920
I think I probably entered it with you know, a

355
00:19:32.920 --> 00:19:38.680
little more fear in trepidation than than Darren did. And

356
00:19:38.759 --> 00:19:42.759
this is, you know, this is his first marriage, and

357
00:19:42.920 --> 00:19:46.839
I think, you know, it's I think it's something he

358
00:19:47.279 --> 00:19:49.599
wanted to accomplish in his life to be a you know,

359
00:19:49.680 --> 00:19:51.599
be a married man. You know, I kind of felt

360
00:19:51.599 --> 00:19:54.960
like I had already done that. I wasn't opposed to

361
00:19:55.039 --> 00:19:58.279
doing it again, but perhaps entered it with a little

362
00:19:58.279 --> 00:19:59.480
more trepidation and fear.

363
00:20:01.920 --> 00:20:04.680
And don in your case, well you said it was

364
00:20:04.680 --> 00:20:07.319
a strong armed but no.

365
00:20:07.559 --> 00:20:09.880
On the practical side too, it's important because you know,

366
00:20:09.960 --> 00:20:13.440
as Aaron mentioned, there is a matter of combined property.

367
00:20:13.480 --> 00:20:17.039
There's the legality of these things. We've just actually completed

368
00:20:17.079 --> 00:20:20.319
the first two steps of our living trusts and wills

369
00:20:20.359 --> 00:20:23.519
together we own quite a bit of combined property. And

370
00:20:23.559 --> 00:20:26.640
then there's all of the other medical reasons that you'd

371
00:20:26.640 --> 00:20:29.160
want someone to have access to you and to your

372
00:20:29.640 --> 00:20:32.680
health and your care afterwards. Should as we get older,

373
00:20:32.680 --> 00:20:34.440
we don't know what the future is going to bring us.

374
00:20:34.759 --> 00:20:36.759
So on the practical side, to Aaron's point, I mean,

375
00:20:36.799 --> 00:20:39.319
it made perfect sense to do this because I don't

376
00:20:39.319 --> 00:20:41.319
want there to be any question about anyone else being

377
00:20:41.359 --> 00:20:44.799
involved with how my care is given to me in

378
00:20:44.839 --> 00:20:47.839
a certain stage of life, or if something changes drastically.

379
00:20:48.000 --> 00:20:52.200
And that's the practical reality that we dealt with. Plus

380
00:20:52.200 --> 00:20:54.519
the fact that mom, you know, everyone started to give

381
00:20:54.599 --> 00:20:56.200
us a bad time by not being married. So that

382
00:20:56.240 --> 00:20:58.759
was the other side.

383
00:20:58.759 --> 00:21:00.640
That you were living in sin. Is that sin?

384
00:21:01.160 --> 00:21:02.200
Yes, constant sin.

385
00:21:03.519 --> 00:21:05.480
Well that's your whole life story.

386
00:21:08.200 --> 00:21:08.599
Moving on.

387
00:21:09.079 --> 00:21:13.119
Yeah, one question we ask our guests that are in

388
00:21:13.160 --> 00:21:18.559
the club, is there something that advice that you would

389
00:21:18.559 --> 00:21:20.799
give your younger self. And you can pick whatever age

390
00:21:20.799 --> 00:21:24.559
you want, be at twenty five, be at thirty, nineteen, whatever,

391
00:21:26.240 --> 00:21:29.839
with your all the wisdom that you have collected to date.

392
00:21:31.920 --> 00:21:36.160
You know, I was thinking about that question, and yeah,

393
00:21:36.160 --> 00:21:38.319
there are so many different ways to answer it. But

394
00:21:40.799 --> 00:21:45.960
because we're talking about turning sixty, I can imagine, you know,

395
00:21:46.200 --> 00:21:50.720
just the sheer horror that I that I must have

396
00:21:50.839 --> 00:21:55.759
experienced at the age of thirty contemplating the idea that

397
00:21:56.119 --> 00:21:57.839
someday I would.

398
00:21:57.519 --> 00:22:00.799
Be sixty and.

399
00:22:03.559 --> 00:22:05.960
You know the reality, you know, and you'll even hear

400
00:22:06.039 --> 00:22:09.000
people say that, you know, oh, the gay community has

401
00:22:09.079 --> 00:22:11.920
no place for people, you know, once they're you know,

402
00:22:12.079 --> 00:22:18.240
forty and above and finding that that's just not true,

403
00:22:18.359 --> 00:22:22.319
you know, and and you know, things change. You know,

404
00:22:22.440 --> 00:22:26.079
I don't approach life, nor do I approach approach the

405
00:22:26.119 --> 00:22:29.319
gay community and my involvement in the gay community at

406
00:22:29.480 --> 00:22:35.880
sixty as I did in my early thirties. But but

407
00:22:36.000 --> 00:22:40.720
this idea that you know, that that oh, you know,

408
00:22:41.000 --> 00:22:47.079
you're you know, you're of no value, you know, as

409
00:22:47.119 --> 00:22:51.480
someone you know in your fifties, in your sixties in

410
00:22:51.519 --> 00:22:55.920
the gay community. Well, you know, how are you judging that?

411
00:22:56.160 --> 00:22:59.799
Are you judging? You know, you know your value is

412
00:23:00.119 --> 00:23:06.960
one you know, taking off their shirt at a circuit party.

413
00:23:07.960 --> 00:23:11.519
But you know, if any I feel very much, you know,

414
00:23:11.720 --> 00:23:16.240
having a place in the gay community. It's a sixty

415
00:23:16.319 --> 00:23:21.720
year old place, right, It's but but that but that's there.

416
00:23:22.720 --> 00:23:24.559
And you know, and as I said, you know, I

417
00:23:24.599 --> 00:23:27.680
mean just just imagining the sheer horror that I must

418
00:23:27.680 --> 00:23:30.960
have experienced as a thirty year old, just contemplating the

419
00:23:31.039 --> 00:23:34.640
idea of someday I will turn sixty and I will

420
00:23:34.680 --> 00:23:39.720
have no value. And you know, I hate to say that,

421
00:23:40.000 --> 00:23:44.759
you know, Okay, I'm now married, but even someone in

422
00:23:44.839 --> 00:23:48.079
my you know, mid to late fifties, you know, the

423
00:23:48.160 --> 00:23:52.839
idea that you know you, no one would desire you,

424
00:23:55.039 --> 00:24:01.079
even that has no truth to it, right, It's true.

425
00:24:04.640 --> 00:24:06.480
God, do you don't go on to anything else?

426
00:24:06.559 --> 00:24:06.680
Right?

427
00:24:06.920 --> 00:24:09.559
I mentioned quite a few things there too, because I

428
00:24:09.759 --> 00:24:11.880
think you'd mentioned you know, I was going to say,

429
00:24:11.920 --> 00:24:14.920
have you you and your husband talked about next steps

430
00:24:15.640 --> 00:24:17.759
when it comes to this age? You know, everyone is

431
00:24:18.359 --> 00:24:22.519
also pointing towards retirement, whatever that looks like, or not retiring,

432
00:24:22.920 --> 00:24:26.359
or continuing their careers, or also starting to think more

433
00:24:26.559 --> 00:24:31.079
proactively about what the next thing will be. Now, you know,

434
00:24:31.279 --> 00:24:34.799
all of us have different agendas, and perhaps you want

435
00:24:34.799 --> 00:24:38.680
to keep practicing forever and never stop it, or do

436
00:24:38.680 --> 00:24:40.680
you have an end date or have even just thought

437
00:24:40.720 --> 00:24:43.799
about that yet. I don't mean an end date, final

438
00:24:43.880 --> 00:24:46.119
end date. I just mean an endate towards.

439
00:24:45.880 --> 00:24:47.720
Thank you, thank you professional.

440
00:24:47.799 --> 00:24:49.599
Although I probably have one of those two.

441
00:24:49.720 --> 00:24:51.440
We all have one of those. We just don't know

442
00:24:51.480 --> 00:24:53.160
which one it is or when it is. So, but

443
00:24:53.440 --> 00:24:55.359
I mean, what have you thought about what the next

444
00:24:55.400 --> 00:24:56.640
step might look like?

445
00:24:59.400 --> 00:25:00.480
Something that you know?

446
00:25:00.640 --> 00:25:06.319
Is interesting about sixty for me, you know, and I'm

447
00:25:06.359 --> 00:25:09.039
going to think about sixty almost more as a decade

448
00:25:09.079 --> 00:25:12.400
as opposed to an you know, a birthday or a year.

449
00:25:13.000 --> 00:25:17.400
But on one hand, people say, oh, what does it

450
00:25:17.440 --> 00:25:22.519
feel like to have turned sixty? There's something liberating about

451
00:25:22.559 --> 00:25:27.200
turning sixty. There's something liberating about being in my sixties

452
00:25:27.640 --> 00:25:31.079
because I think this is a decade for many people,

453
00:25:31.119 --> 00:25:34.519
and I think it will be for me of change

454
00:25:34.720 --> 00:25:36.880
and liberation to change.

455
00:25:38.000 --> 00:25:39.799
You know. I think we are given.

456
00:25:39.599 --> 00:25:44.440
License to make significant shifts in our you know, in

457
00:25:44.480 --> 00:25:48.079
our career or to end our career. And I think

458
00:25:48.200 --> 00:25:53.319
most people do that in their sixties. And I have

459
00:25:53.400 --> 00:25:58.680
to say that approaching sixty for me was a combination

460
00:25:59.039 --> 00:26:02.559
of you know, I was there an element of dread, like,

461
00:26:02.680 --> 00:26:04.920
oh my god, I'm going to be sixty? Yes, yes

462
00:26:05.039 --> 00:26:09.119
there was. Was there an element of excitement that I'm

463
00:26:09.160 --> 00:26:11.359
going to be in my sixties and that's going to

464
00:26:11.519 --> 00:26:15.240
afford me, you know, at least from a societal perspective,

465
00:26:15.839 --> 00:26:20.359
you know, certain flexibility and freedom and so the to

466
00:26:20.359 --> 00:26:23.200
answer your question, you know, yes, we are talking about

467
00:26:23.279 --> 00:26:26.359
what is retired life going to look like? When are

468
00:26:26.400 --> 00:26:28.000
we going to pull the When am I going to

469
00:26:28.079 --> 00:26:32.720
pull the trigger on that? What what will life look

470
00:26:32.920 --> 00:26:39.599
like after that? Does retirement mean a complete cessation of

471
00:26:39.720 --> 00:26:43.519
work or does it mean, and I think that this

472
00:26:43.599 --> 00:26:46.119
is some of what I'm looking at personally. You know,

473
00:26:46.240 --> 00:26:50.400
does it mean more flexibility in terms of how I

474
00:26:50.440 --> 00:26:53.519
approach work at least for some period of time, you know,

475
00:26:53.599 --> 00:26:56.960
no longer working a job with a boss, but maybe

476
00:26:57.480 --> 00:27:00.839
doing some teaching, some consulting, something that are a little

477
00:27:00.839 --> 00:27:03.680
more you know, self driven.

478
00:27:03.839 --> 00:27:04.759
And so I.

479
00:27:07.559 --> 00:27:11.720
In some ways welcome to sixty because of you know,

480
00:27:11.759 --> 00:27:13.839
and it's not that you can't make these decisions at

481
00:27:13.839 --> 00:27:19.640
fifty five. They're just more societally sanctioned to say, I'm

482
00:27:19.680 --> 00:27:25.279
making these decisions, making this change in my sixties, and

483
00:27:25.319 --> 00:27:26.720
there's a freedom that comes with that.

484
00:27:27.880 --> 00:27:30.519
I have also seen a lot of people reinvent themselves too,

485
00:27:30.599 --> 00:27:33.240
because you know, people are also saying, you know, with

486
00:27:33.359 --> 00:27:36.079
perhaps not retiring completely, but saying, Okay, I'm going to

487
00:27:36.079 --> 00:27:39.359
consult in my profession going forward, and I can choose

488
00:27:39.400 --> 00:27:42.359
when I work. If they're so lucky, if they have

489
00:27:42.400 --> 00:27:44.839
that luxury, which is wonderful because then they can also

490
00:27:44.920 --> 00:27:47.640
devote time to other things that they find more rewarding,

491
00:27:47.839 --> 00:27:51.240
or reinvent themselves to take some more paths towards their

492
00:27:51.799 --> 00:27:54.160
career that they hadn't taken the past. People are going

493
00:27:54.200 --> 00:27:58.799
back to school, people are joining organizations. People are not

494
00:27:59.039 --> 00:28:02.400
seeing as a stopping point, as you say, but actually

495
00:28:02.480 --> 00:28:06.160
a stomping off point and a diving board up into

496
00:28:06.200 --> 00:28:09.000
something new, a new pool of something else, which is

497
00:28:09.079 --> 00:28:10.640
very exciting to me because I think, you know, all

498
00:28:10.720 --> 00:28:15.039
of us have experienced some form of reinvention or either've

499
00:28:15.039 --> 00:28:17.480
been forced because there's also people are laid off at

500
00:28:17.480 --> 00:28:20.599
a certain age. They have to make decisions do I

501
00:28:20.640 --> 00:28:22.839
continue after I've been laid off from my job of

502
00:28:23.000 --> 00:28:25.519
twenty some odd years or whatever, because there is a

503
00:28:25.519 --> 00:28:29.680
lot of that based on age and also salaries where

504
00:28:29.680 --> 00:28:32.400
people are actually being taken out of their job or

505
00:28:32.440 --> 00:28:34.839
workplace and they're changing. So I think I agree with

506
00:28:34.880 --> 00:28:37.000
you there's a lot of positivity out of this. You

507
00:28:37.000 --> 00:28:39.839
can make something really great out of a negative experience

508
00:28:39.880 --> 00:28:42.079
like being laid off from your job, to actually make

509
00:28:42.160 --> 00:28:44.880
take a new path. And I think that's a different

510
00:28:44.920 --> 00:28:48.279
perspective that maybe our parents' generations didn't have because you

511
00:28:48.279 --> 00:28:50.359
stopped working at sixty five or whatever the age was

512
00:28:50.359 --> 00:28:52.680
at the time. You literally just stopped. You got a pension,

513
00:28:52.839 --> 00:28:53.400
and you just.

514
00:28:53.720 --> 00:28:56.759
Golfed or whatever it was, because that's what people did.

515
00:28:57.319 --> 00:28:59.880
Yeah, people did, and I don't see that so much anymore.

516
00:29:01.880 --> 00:29:04.759
I look at it as if you are contemplating at

517
00:29:04.799 --> 00:29:08.720
this stage, what have I done? Have I accomplished the

518
00:29:08.839 --> 00:29:12.400
things that I wanted to accomplish? You know, I had

519
00:29:12.400 --> 00:29:16.759
a dream to do X and I just turned sixty

520
00:29:16.960 --> 00:29:20.480
and I haven't done that. So how you know, if

521
00:29:20.519 --> 00:29:23.680
you really want to do it, you got to do it.

522
00:29:23.799 --> 00:29:26.920
You know, strike while the iron is hot, and maybe

523
00:29:26.960 --> 00:29:30.079
at sixty is when you are more stable in a

524
00:29:30.119 --> 00:29:32.319
lot of things in your life, so you're able to,

525
00:29:32.400 --> 00:29:36.400
maybe if it's a risk, take that risk, so you

526
00:29:36.400 --> 00:29:39.960
don't look back and say, oh, I should have done this,

527
00:29:40.119 --> 00:29:41.160
I should have done that.

528
00:29:41.839 --> 00:29:46.920
Yeah, I will share with you an ongoing discussion. You

529
00:29:46.960 --> 00:29:49.920
know that you know that Darren and I have and

530
00:29:49.920 --> 00:29:53.759
that I have with friends as well, and that is

531
00:29:55.039 --> 00:30:00.440
you know, some of the pitfalls, potential pitfalls that we

532
00:30:00.519 --> 00:30:08.200
see around us. Gay men generally don't play golf, but

533
00:30:09.920 --> 00:30:13.680
we do have a tendency to day drink, and so.

534
00:30:13.839 --> 00:30:14.359
How to.

535
00:30:16.079 --> 00:30:21.160
You know, how to you know, create a retirement and

536
00:30:21.200 --> 00:30:27.440
a life after retirement that doesn't evolve into meeting up

537
00:30:27.480 --> 00:30:31.119
with friends and day drinking on a daily basis, and

538
00:30:31.319 --> 00:30:32.799
you know, I have to say that that, you know,

539
00:30:32.839 --> 00:30:37.240
that's actually a real fear, you know, because because it's

540
00:30:37.240 --> 00:30:40.400
something I see, you know, I see around me, you know,

541
00:30:40.799 --> 00:30:46.759
in terms of you know, gay retirees, you know, especially

542
00:30:46.839 --> 00:30:52.440
you know gay retirees who go to gay retirement destinations

543
00:30:52.640 --> 00:30:59.359
like you know, Palm Springs, Portavarta, that you know, I'm

544
00:30:59.440 --> 00:31:05.039
I'm hoping that retired life looks something somewhat more meaningful

545
00:31:05.279 --> 00:31:10.559
than taking up day drinking. Yeah, golf is unlikely. I've

546
00:31:10.599 --> 00:31:12.000
never played golf in my life.

547
00:31:12.079 --> 00:31:18.160
Pickleball. It's all about the pickleb possibility. You're active, you

548
00:31:18.200 --> 00:31:20.200
can actually hold a glass of wine while you're doing

549
00:31:20.240 --> 00:31:22.200
because it's very civilized, so.

550
00:31:22.119 --> 00:31:24.400
You can permit it it is.

551
00:31:24.480 --> 00:31:26.759
But yeah, I agree with you. I think it's it's

552
00:31:26.799 --> 00:31:30.200
important that people don't fall into that I don't say trap,

553
00:31:30.480 --> 00:31:33.799
but into that trope maybe of thinking that, you know,

554
00:31:33.920 --> 00:31:36.559
that's what you do. Because in Palm Springs, for example,

555
00:31:36.559 --> 00:31:39.960
where we also spend time, there are many groups of

556
00:31:40.200 --> 00:31:43.920
older people that are getting together that are called primetimers

557
00:31:43.920 --> 00:31:46.039
of the desert. And guess what they do at three

558
00:31:46.079 --> 00:31:49.799
o'clock in the afternoon. They're drinking for a few hours.

559
00:31:49.880 --> 00:31:54.319
Oh, they're starting late, but I know, I think it's important.

560
00:31:54.319 --> 00:31:57.920
That's why it's good to get into good routines or

561
00:31:57.960 --> 00:32:01.319
habits now or earlier than this. So you have those

562
00:32:01.359 --> 00:32:03.799
things if you're interested in exercise, if you're interested if

563
00:32:03.839 --> 00:32:06.960
you like to walk, if you want to start biking,

564
00:32:07.039 --> 00:32:09.839
if you want to play pickleball, you know, even golf.

565
00:32:09.960 --> 00:32:13.160
I mean, again, not many people play golf, but it's

566
00:32:13.200 --> 00:32:16.240
it's something that you're actually doing. What we're doing with

567
00:32:16.279 --> 00:32:19.680
this podcast, for example, I intend to take this further past,

568
00:32:19.839 --> 00:32:23.119
you know, for years to come in some version or form,

569
00:32:23.160 --> 00:32:25.920
and I'm learning new things. I'm learning how to podcast,

570
00:32:26.000 --> 00:32:28.880
I'm learning how to edit, I'm learning how to work

571
00:32:28.920 --> 00:32:31.920
with new apps and programs. So I'm actually very excited

572
00:32:31.920 --> 00:32:35.759
about being stimulated mentally on new things to learn and

573
00:32:35.799 --> 00:32:39.039
do because I was never adapt at technology, like much

574
00:32:39.119 --> 00:32:40.519
like our generation, I guess.

575
00:32:43.160 --> 00:32:46.400
And don Ye also mentioned earlier, like you know, taking classes.

576
00:32:46.759 --> 00:32:49.559
Maybe you want to explore your artistic endeavors that you

577
00:32:49.640 --> 00:32:54.640
never got a chance to do. Go to yeah, go

578
00:32:54.680 --> 00:32:57.200
to the local university. It's all kinds of options available

579
00:32:57.240 --> 00:32:59.319
for you. So yeah, we definitely find things to do

580
00:32:59.759 --> 00:33:01.680
that don't involve sitting at a barstool.

581
00:33:02.160 --> 00:33:08.880
And I think I think in the last podcast where

582
00:33:08.880 --> 00:33:09.839
I joined.

583
00:33:09.519 --> 00:33:13.359
You, you know, we talked about my you know, well

584
00:33:13.559 --> 00:33:15.799
I would have been my partner at the time, but

585
00:33:16.000 --> 00:33:20.079
you know, having a place in Portsoaarta and giving some

586
00:33:20.119 --> 00:33:24.319
consideration to at least living part time, if not full time,

587
00:33:24.799 --> 00:33:31.480
in Mexico and meeting up with people there, establishing friendships there,

588
00:33:31.519 --> 00:33:35.880
which we are already doing, and just how many different

589
00:33:36.039 --> 00:33:43.160
volunteer opportunities there are for you know, Americans and Canadians

590
00:33:43.200 --> 00:33:47.279
who live there, you know, to support the community around them.

591
00:33:47.680 --> 00:33:50.880
And you know, so those are things that I very much,

592
00:33:51.480 --> 00:33:54.200
you know, not only would I want to be involved in,

593
00:33:54.240 --> 00:33:57.880
but I'd almost feel that I need it to to

594
00:33:57.920 --> 00:34:04.319
create a purpose in a post retirement life.

595
00:34:04.480 --> 00:34:07.759
So you've been going there pretty regularly for a while now,

596
00:34:07.880 --> 00:34:09.519
or is it a newer destination for you.

597
00:34:10.440 --> 00:34:11.639
Well, it's a place that.

598
00:34:13.760 --> 00:34:19.119
I loved to go to occasionally probably for the last

599
00:34:19.159 --> 00:34:23.599
twenty five years. Oh okay, but the idea that hey,

600
00:34:23.679 --> 00:34:28.960
this could potentially be a retirement destination and as such,

601
00:34:30.320 --> 00:34:35.400
it's not just about going there on vacation and you know,

602
00:34:35.559 --> 00:34:37.719
just having a great time and coming back, but it's

603
00:34:37.719 --> 00:34:44.960
about meeting people there, establishing relationships there, learning about, you know,

604
00:34:45.039 --> 00:34:49.639
volunteer opportunities in the community and organizations that are supporting

605
00:34:50.239 --> 00:34:55.960
the community around Porto Aarta. That's something I would say

606
00:34:56.719 --> 00:34:59.800
perhaps in the last three years.

607
00:34:59.519 --> 00:35:02.360
And it's a different approach, you know, to going to

608
00:35:02.480 --> 00:35:03.280
Porta i Arta.

609
00:35:03.440 --> 00:35:06.639
It's not about you know, what are the restaurants we're

610
00:35:06.639 --> 00:35:08.039
going to hit up, what are the bars we're going

611
00:35:08.119 --> 00:35:09.599
to hit up, you know, what are the shows we're

612
00:35:09.599 --> 00:35:12.960
going to see. It's you know, who are the friends

613
00:35:13.000 --> 00:35:14.360
that we're going to get together with.

614
00:35:16.679 --> 00:35:19.239
And so you ended up buying a place there. How

615
00:35:19.519 --> 00:35:21.760
was that a kind of since you've been going for

616
00:35:21.800 --> 00:35:24.840
so long that seemed like a logical decision to.

617
00:35:24.800 --> 00:35:33.519
Make or completely illogical? There was a fantasy element to it,

618
00:35:33.599 --> 00:35:38.960
to be sure, now having done it, was it a mistake?

619
00:35:39.199 --> 00:35:44.960
Absolutely not? But was was it always just this well

620
00:35:45.039 --> 00:35:49.679
thought out part of a part of my financial plan?

621
00:35:49.920 --> 00:35:50.880
No, there was.

622
00:35:50.920 --> 00:35:54.320
There was a fantasy element to it, having a place

623
00:35:54.360 --> 00:35:58.719
in port of i Arta and that's been realized. And

624
00:36:00.920 --> 00:36:04.960
ask me in ten years, how did we use that opportunity?

625
00:36:05.920 --> 00:36:11.280
And I'll tell you, was it a really good idea?

626
00:36:11.800 --> 00:36:14.679
So bron and Gary down seventy comes out, we'll call

627
00:36:14.719 --> 00:36:15.320
you back and.

628
00:36:15.320 --> 00:36:18.039
Yes, right, please do well.

629
00:36:18.079 --> 00:36:20.360
By then we'll have been invited to stay at the

630
00:36:20.400 --> 00:36:23.199
house in Puerto Bayarda and then we can maybe we

631
00:36:23.320 --> 00:36:25.719
record from there, don And of course.

632
00:36:25.480 --> 00:36:30.000
You are invited and my WiFi works great.

633
00:36:31.519 --> 00:36:34.559
Here's the thing though, it's forward momentum there is with that.

634
00:36:34.639 --> 00:36:36.920
I always feel like our lives need to move forward

635
00:36:37.400 --> 00:36:39.960
and having a place and to look forward to going

636
00:36:40.039 --> 00:36:43.239
to every season or whenever you want to or on

637
00:36:43.280 --> 00:36:46.119
a whim. What a wonderful gift that is to be

638
00:36:46.159 --> 00:36:47.599
able to just jump on a plane because it's a

639
00:36:47.639 --> 00:36:51.000
couple of few hours from La or from San Francisco. Yeah,

640
00:36:51.039 --> 00:36:53.800
so it's an easy trip. But also, as you said, establishing,

641
00:36:53.840 --> 00:36:56.559
there's a whole new environment that you're going to have

642
00:36:56.639 --> 00:37:00.519
that's away from the city, that's a very different So

643
00:37:00.559 --> 00:37:03.239
I love the idea of that because it just opens

644
00:37:03.280 --> 00:37:07.000
up so much opportunity to do and stimulate your mind

645
00:37:07.519 --> 00:37:11.199
and your health and everything. So forward momentum me and it's,

646
00:37:11.280 --> 00:37:13.679
like I said, something to look forward to, which I

647
00:37:13.719 --> 00:37:16.360
think is also important for all of us our in

648
00:37:16.400 --> 00:37:18.280
this age or state of our lives.

649
00:37:19.440 --> 00:37:23.119
And I think something to be said for gay retirement destinations.

650
00:37:23.440 --> 00:37:26.320
I have friends who have moved to Palm Springs, and

651
00:37:26.400 --> 00:37:31.400
I think they share this experience with me. This experience

652
00:37:31.440 --> 00:37:37.400
that I'm having is I'm transitioning into Portovarta, is most

653
00:37:37.719 --> 00:37:41.880
of the gay men who live there came from somewhere else,

654
00:37:42.800 --> 00:37:48.800
and there's a hunger to establish community. And it's a

655
00:37:48.880 --> 00:37:52.960
different experience that I have when I'm there and when

656
00:37:53.000 --> 00:37:55.119
I talk to my friends who've gone to Palm Springs

657
00:37:55.639 --> 00:37:59.000
then I'm having here in San Francisco, in that you

658
00:37:59.079 --> 00:38:03.119
have a whole community of people that are recently arrived,

659
00:38:03.639 --> 00:38:06.960
they left wherever it was that they came from, and

660
00:38:07.159 --> 00:38:11.480
there's a hunger to meet new friends, established community, and

661
00:38:12.079 --> 00:38:17.119
you know, I find it easier, you know, to meet

662
00:38:17.159 --> 00:38:23.039
new people there then I'm experiencing here. And I have

663
00:38:23.079 --> 00:38:25.599
to ask myself how much of that is about San Francisco,

664
00:38:25.719 --> 00:38:28.679
maybe how much of that is about me? And I

665
00:38:28.719 --> 00:38:31.000
don't quite know, you know, but but it does feel

666
00:38:31.000 --> 00:38:33.159
that there is something to be said for this idea

667
00:38:33.280 --> 00:38:36.079
of the retirement destination.

668
00:38:40.760 --> 00:38:43.960
You also mentioned when you say that, so you mentioned

669
00:38:44.000 --> 00:38:47.159
community too, because I think that's something that we're establishing

670
00:38:47.199 --> 00:38:51.159
in different parts of the country Palm Springs TV other

671
00:38:51.199 --> 00:38:53.199
parts of the country also. But one thing I'm seeing

672
00:38:53.199 --> 00:38:56.000
a little bit more of is the idea of communal living.

673
00:38:56.039 --> 00:38:58.239
I know that's not what we're talking about specifically, but

674
00:38:58.360 --> 00:39:01.559
communal living for people going oh old, straight, gay, whatever.

675
00:39:02.480 --> 00:39:04.960
There's a lot more of a search for that, and

676
00:39:05.000 --> 00:39:08.519
I've seen a lot more social media based on it,

677
00:39:09.000 --> 00:39:11.079
showing where people need to go to group together and

678
00:39:11.119 --> 00:39:14.639
perhaps spend time in their older years together as more

679
00:39:14.679 --> 00:39:17.239
of a community. So I think community is actually a

680
00:39:17.280 --> 00:39:20.039
big thing. You mentioned it on a broad spectrum with

681
00:39:20.239 --> 00:39:23.119
you know where you're looking at in PV and Palm Springs,

682
00:39:23.119 --> 00:39:26.199
but I agree, we're all looking for another community to build.

683
00:39:30.400 --> 00:39:32.360
Yeah, what I was going to say is tied into

684
00:39:32.400 --> 00:39:36.199
that is that as I've gotten older, a lot of

685
00:39:36.239 --> 00:39:38.559
my friends for one reason that they have moved away.

686
00:39:38.679 --> 00:39:43.039
So my core group of friends has kind of thinned out.

687
00:39:44.119 --> 00:39:47.760
And so I came up on something I was watching

688
00:39:47.840 --> 00:39:53.039
the day, is it how easy is it to make

689
00:39:53.119 --> 00:39:56.320
new friends as you get older? And yes, I do

690
00:39:56.360 --> 00:39:57.920
a lot of volunteer works. I meet a lot of

691
00:39:57.920 --> 00:40:03.599
people of that, but it's I don't necessarily hang out

692
00:40:03.639 --> 00:40:07.599
with them outside of when we're together doing our volunteer work. Right,

693
00:40:07.639 --> 00:40:10.800
So I have my my neighbor friends that we try

694
00:40:10.840 --> 00:40:14.079
and get together once in a while, and then folks that

695
00:40:14.079 --> 00:40:16.599
have volunteer with. But I'm in an I'm in an

696
00:40:16.679 --> 00:40:19.800
office at home. I work by myself, so there's no

697
00:40:22.559 --> 00:40:25.920
relationships work relationships. I can hang out with all day

698
00:40:25.960 --> 00:40:28.679
and do something at night. So that's the challenge I've

699
00:40:28.679 --> 00:40:31.639
had where because I'm single, I don't I don't like

700
00:40:31.719 --> 00:40:34.480
going to the bars. Never did, right unless as you

701
00:40:34.599 --> 00:40:39.480
and such, I'm meeting with friends, okay, but in my well,

702
00:40:39.519 --> 00:40:43.320
in my elder years, done when I was younger, different stuff.

703
00:40:43.320 --> 00:40:46.159
I've been a few hours in our time.

704
00:40:46.199 --> 00:40:47.960
But okay, it's like what.

705
00:40:47.960 --> 00:40:53.079
I've seen you, Gary, I know i've seen you well allegedly.

706
00:40:53.360 --> 00:40:55.920
Yes, I used to go to the bars a lot,

707
00:40:56.239 --> 00:40:59.800
but I don't unless someone's visiting and they want to

708
00:40:59.800 --> 00:41:04.079
go it hit the old haunts. Fine, But that's the

709
00:41:04.159 --> 00:41:07.320
challenge I have now is so I've actually looked at

710
00:41:07.400 --> 00:41:10.679
but they're super expensive. Look at those, you know, retirement

711
00:41:11.719 --> 00:41:16.239
communities that where you can be around other people your

712
00:41:16.320 --> 00:41:19.760
age and you know, and then intermix with them. But

713
00:41:20.119 --> 00:41:23.159
it's it's not cheap.

714
00:41:23.760 --> 00:41:25.480
Nope, nope.

715
00:41:25.679 --> 00:41:27.599
So I yeah, So I'm kind of at that age

716
00:41:27.639 --> 00:41:28.800
We're like, well, I don't know what I'm going to

717
00:41:28.880 --> 00:41:32.000
do because I'm looking at you know, if I retire

718
00:41:32.320 --> 00:41:35.199
at sixty seven, that's you know, five years from now,

719
00:41:35.920 --> 00:41:38.400
and yes, I can continue living here and doing my

720
00:41:38.480 --> 00:41:42.400
volunteer work, but but the herd is thinning.

721
00:41:43.519 --> 00:41:44.679
So it's.

722
00:41:46.760 --> 00:41:49.679
That is so much you know what has been my

723
00:41:50.000 --> 00:41:53.320
San Francisco experience over the last decade. Yeah, And I

724
00:41:53.360 --> 00:41:55.880
don't know how much of that is unique to San Francisco.

725
00:41:55.960 --> 00:41:57.880
I think some of it is unique to the Bay Area.

726
00:41:58.559 --> 00:42:03.159
But you know, as I was approaching sixty now being

727
00:42:03.280 --> 00:42:07.519
sixty and you know, I have friends that probably range

728
00:42:07.559 --> 00:42:10.360
from you know, ten years older to me than me,

729
00:42:10.519 --> 00:42:14.880
ten years younger than me, no one was talking about

730
00:42:15.039 --> 00:42:20.599
doing retirement in San Francisco. Everyone was talking about, you know,

731
00:42:20.679 --> 00:42:22.239
when I retire, I.

732
00:42:22.199 --> 00:42:26.440
Will go too. And then it started to happen. Gary.

733
00:42:29.199 --> 00:42:32.679
You know, I have friends who was on their bucket

734
00:42:32.679 --> 00:42:37.480
list to move to France. They moved to France. Other

735
00:42:37.599 --> 00:42:40.599
friends who just felt priced out of the area in

736
00:42:40.679 --> 00:42:46.360
retirement and moved to Santa Fe. Other friends who you know,

737
00:42:46.920 --> 00:42:53.079
felt priced out and moved to you know, Sacramento, you know,

738
00:42:53.199 --> 00:42:56.239
and that's accessible, but it's not like, hey, what are

739
00:42:56.280 --> 00:42:56.760
you doing tonight?

740
00:42:56.760 --> 00:42:59.800
Should we have dinner? Is you know, it's not that accessible.

741
00:43:01.400 --> 00:43:03.719
And then of course you know a number of friends

742
00:43:03.760 --> 00:43:08.119
who have moved to Palm Springs, as many gay men

743
00:43:08.159 --> 00:43:13.239
in California do post retirement. So everyone was talking about

744
00:43:13.239 --> 00:43:16.119
their retirement. No one was talking about staying in the

745
00:43:16.119 --> 00:43:22.239
Bay Area because of price, and then asking the question

746
00:43:22.320 --> 00:43:24.719
are we still getting you know, are we still getting

747
00:43:24.760 --> 00:43:28.960
our money's worth staying? You know, it's not the it's

748
00:43:29.000 --> 00:43:30.880
not the same place that many of us moved to.

749
00:43:32.239 --> 00:43:35.599
And there's all the things that are going through my

750
00:43:35.679 --> 00:43:38.199
head and people have said, well, you know, why don't

751
00:43:38.239 --> 00:43:41.519
you move to X or retire to this? Like why

752
00:43:41.519 --> 00:43:43.360
would I move to a place where I don't know

753
00:43:43.440 --> 00:43:49.320
anyone when I have established from here, my family's here,

754
00:43:50.079 --> 00:43:52.159
you know, friends here. I would not want to pick

755
00:43:52.239 --> 00:43:56.599
up and move somewhere else just oh, because it's financially better.

756
00:43:57.559 --> 00:44:00.079
I mean, that's one way you can look at it.

757
00:44:00.079 --> 00:44:01.400
I don't want to do it based on that.

758
00:44:02.840 --> 00:44:05.400
And there's nothing wrong with living in the city forever.

759
00:44:05.599 --> 00:44:07.239
You know what I mean, there's nothing wrong with that.

760
00:44:07.320 --> 00:44:09.480
I mean, I love San Francisco. I hadn't really it

761
00:44:10.119 --> 00:44:13.440
wasn't my first choice to move here to the beach.

762
00:44:13.519 --> 00:44:15.000
I mean, you o the beach, But I mean it

763
00:44:15.039 --> 00:44:17.320
wasn't my first choice to leave San Francisco because we've

764
00:44:17.320 --> 00:44:19.840
been here forever and I loved living there. We loved

765
00:44:19.880 --> 00:44:23.119
where we lived, loved our home, loved the family that

766
00:44:23.199 --> 00:44:24.880
was there, we loved all the friends that we had.

767
00:44:24.880 --> 00:44:26.599
But you know, to Gary's point, since we were actually

768
00:44:26.639 --> 00:44:29.960
I'm one of the herd that thinned out to the left. Yeah,

769
00:44:30.360 --> 00:44:32.800
you know, I was one of those people among many

770
00:44:32.840 --> 00:44:35.960
that left for whatever reason. But it's also very similar

771
00:44:36.000 --> 00:44:37.599
because you know, as I said, I have house guests

772
00:44:37.599 --> 00:44:41.519
here from Brooklyn. They're never going to leave New York.

773
00:44:41.800 --> 00:44:44.360
They are never going to leave Brooklyn. And I say

774
00:44:44.360 --> 00:44:46.360
that adamantly because I already talked with them about that,

775
00:44:46.400 --> 00:44:48.519
because you know, it's a different thing having people who

776
00:44:48.559 --> 00:44:53.079
also have perhaps rented their whole lives, had never had

777
00:44:53.119 --> 00:44:55.840
to purchase a home or made the commitment to a home.

778
00:44:55.920 --> 00:45:00.559
The financial costs, you know, the tension of keeping that

779
00:45:00.719 --> 00:45:03.320
mortgage payment going, all those things, you know, so they're

780
00:45:03.320 --> 00:45:07.519
a little more used to paying rent or you know,

781
00:45:07.559 --> 00:45:10.079
a higher rent. But they're never gonna leave Gary Stan

782
00:45:10.079 --> 00:45:12.039
in San Francisco the whole time. Your family is there,

783
00:45:12.079 --> 00:45:14.079
your core is there. We can always jump on a

784
00:45:14.079 --> 00:45:16.639
plane and come see you. You know, it's like that's true.

785
00:45:16.760 --> 00:45:19.960
Yeah, yeah, I mean it's luckily it's close enough that yes,

786
00:45:21.119 --> 00:45:22.920
you can do that as it is Puerto by Yerta.

787
00:45:23.000 --> 00:45:23.519
You know, like.

788
00:45:25.239 --> 00:45:26.719
For me, he's pushing that one.

789
00:45:28.280 --> 00:45:31.559
That's right, Come on, I've done it a couple of times.

790
00:45:32.320 --> 00:45:38.079
So change the subject. One of our little segments, if

791
00:45:38.079 --> 00:45:42.119
we will in the club is ain't nobody got time

792
00:45:42.159 --> 00:45:46.039
for that? So we think about you know, you've you've

793
00:45:46.039 --> 00:45:49.719
been on this earth for sixty years, so you've lived

794
00:45:49.719 --> 00:45:54.840
a life, and so looking back or just other things

795
00:45:54.880 --> 00:45:59.599
around you at age sixty, what is it? They're like,

796
00:45:59.639 --> 00:46:02.360
you know what, I'm not putting up with that anymore,

797
00:46:02.440 --> 00:46:04.679
or I just I don't have time for that anymore.

798
00:46:06.760 --> 00:46:10.199
Take it away.

799
00:46:11.440 --> 00:46:15.119
That's a hard one for me to answer, because I

800
00:46:15.159 --> 00:46:22.239
think in some ways I've become more patient. I'd like

801
00:46:22.320 --> 00:46:27.239
to think I've become more patient with age than perhaps.

802
00:46:26.800 --> 00:46:28.599
I was in my thirties and forties.

803
00:46:28.960 --> 00:46:31.079
But I think really, I think, you know, the core

804
00:46:31.119 --> 00:46:35.920
of your question is about patience, you know, and what

805
00:46:36.000 --> 00:46:41.719
are the things that I've become impatient of? And of

806
00:46:41.800 --> 00:46:44.840
course there are things that I am patient of, but

807
00:46:44.880 --> 00:46:47.159
I think, you know, for the most part, I feel

808
00:46:47.199 --> 00:46:51.320
myself becoming a more patient person. And I think that

809
00:46:51.320 --> 00:46:56.599
that's something that I've strived for, because I think there

810
00:46:56.719 --> 00:46:57.920
probably been times.

811
00:46:57.639 --> 00:46:58.880
That I've been quite impatient.

812
00:47:03.920 --> 00:47:07.639
But I you know, things that are wasting my time,

813
00:47:09.280 --> 00:47:15.000
I think are things that I feel limited patients for,

814
00:47:15.079 --> 00:47:18.119
or this I don't have time for that I was

815
00:47:18.280 --> 00:47:21.480
just having, you know, I'm sixty, was having a conversation

816
00:47:21.599 --> 00:47:25.639
with a friend of mine in his seventies about, you know,

817
00:47:25.840 --> 00:47:27.480
how much garbage.

818
00:47:27.000 --> 00:47:30.400
Is on Facebook these days and what a waste of time.

819
00:47:30.519 --> 00:47:32.960
Facebook feels like it's becoming because it's just.

820
00:47:33.000 --> 00:47:38.360
All of this, you know, suggested for you material that

821
00:47:38.440 --> 00:47:41.239
has absolutely nothing to do with any interest I've ever

822
00:47:41.320 --> 00:47:49.159
expressed online, and you know, and ads and so you know,

823
00:47:49.199 --> 00:47:51.519
that felt, you know, and it felt like both of

824
00:47:51.599 --> 00:47:54.119
us were like, I don't have time for this, and

825
00:47:54.159 --> 00:47:57.079
both of us were giving consideration to if it wasn't

826
00:47:57.079 --> 00:47:58.760
for the fact it's how we keep up with our

827
00:47:58.800 --> 00:48:01.760
friends that maybe we would just throw it away. But

828
00:48:01.840 --> 00:48:04.679
I guess that's part of their algorithm in knowing that

829
00:48:04.679 --> 00:48:10.079
we're very unlikely to throw it away. So, you know,

830
00:48:10.119 --> 00:48:14.199
that's just a recent conversation about, you know, something that

831
00:48:15.159 --> 00:48:17.719
I don't know. Maybe the younger people are tolerating this,

832
00:48:17.800 --> 00:48:20.840
Maybe the younger people are appreciating this. You know, this

833
00:48:20.960 --> 00:48:24.159
suggested for you material that's completely out of the blue.

834
00:48:25.719 --> 00:48:30.599
For us, it was like, this is wasting my time.

835
00:48:32.760 --> 00:48:33.400
Let me add to that.

836
00:48:33.440 --> 00:48:37.559
No, my take on it was okahead Gary, go ahead, please, No,

837
00:48:37.559 --> 00:48:39.960
I was gonna say. My take on that question was

838
00:48:40.920 --> 00:48:43.239
from my perspective was when I was younger, I'd be

839
00:48:43.280 --> 00:48:45.320
the type that I wouldn't say anything if something bothered me.

840
00:48:45.719 --> 00:48:48.719
I just you know, kept my mouth shut. But as

841
00:48:48.760 --> 00:48:51.519
I've gotten older, I'm like, you know what, that's not

842
00:48:51.719 --> 00:48:54.079
right what you just said or you just did. So

843
00:48:54.239 --> 00:48:58.519
I'm more likely to speak up now because if I

844
00:48:58.559 --> 00:49:02.239
waited around for someone to say something, everyone's eyes are

845
00:49:02.320 --> 00:49:04.679
divert they'd look down that you know, they might be

846
00:49:05.199 --> 00:49:08.960
tisking under their breath, but they wouldn't do or say anything.

847
00:49:09.760 --> 00:49:11.559
And that's where I would say, you know what, that's

848
00:49:11.599 --> 00:49:13.679
just not right. You can't talk to him like that,

849
00:49:13.840 --> 00:49:17.039
you can't do that whatever, whatever the situation is. I

850
00:49:17.159 --> 00:49:20.199
just felt like someone needed to stand up for this

851
00:49:20.280 --> 00:49:24.400
person or for myself in whatever the situation was. So

852
00:49:24.440 --> 00:49:28.039
that's kind of where where that ain't nobody got time

853
00:49:28.039 --> 00:49:31.719
for that came from just as like I'm older, I'm

854
00:49:31.760 --> 00:49:38.119
wise her to have insurance. To Wanda exactly, So to

855
00:49:38.239 --> 00:49:41.519
Wanda Dot, i'd cut you off.

856
00:49:41.519 --> 00:49:43.199
You were going to say something, No, that's okay. I'm

857
00:49:43.199 --> 00:49:46.400
just gonna say. When it comes to social media, that's

858
00:49:46.440 --> 00:49:49.079
something I'm really interested to see how it evolved, because

859
00:49:49.719 --> 00:49:52.719
I don't have time for the toxic rhetoric that takes

860
00:49:52.719 --> 00:49:56.000
place on almost every social media page. So I don't

861
00:49:56.039 --> 00:49:58.119
have time for that, and I don't engage. I'm actually

862
00:49:58.119 --> 00:50:00.639
even considering whether or not Facebook is a medium I

863
00:50:00.639 --> 00:50:03.559
would use other than showing pictures of fuzzy doggies and

864
00:50:03.639 --> 00:50:06.400
unicorns and saying hi to my friends, because there's just

865
00:50:06.480 --> 00:50:08.840
so much other toxicity in there, which is what it

866
00:50:09.119 --> 00:50:12.559
meant for originally, and that can be said for most

867
00:50:12.719 --> 00:50:15.320
social media platforms. The one question I did ask my

868
00:50:15.360 --> 00:50:17.119
thirty year old guest here was that do you ever

869
00:50:17.280 --> 00:50:21.280
think the younger generations would turn away in some form

870
00:50:22.079 --> 00:50:25.320
from social media, and she said, I don't think so.

871
00:50:25.400 --> 00:50:29.880
TikTok's been shut off today, So that's that's interesting that

872
00:50:29.880 --> 00:50:32.079
that took place. But again, who knows what the future

873
00:50:32.079 --> 00:50:34.119
of that's going to be because of the message that's happening,

874
00:50:34.119 --> 00:50:38.280
what's happening tomorrow. But I think I don't really have

875
00:50:38.360 --> 00:50:41.559
time for all the horrible negativity that spirals from political

876
00:50:41.679 --> 00:50:44.440
discussions that are showing a picture of a fuzzy kitty

877
00:50:44.760 --> 00:50:46.920
and all of a sudden it turns into political discussion

878
00:50:46.960 --> 00:50:49.559
and spirals out of now orders. Oh yeah, exactly, No

879
00:50:49.639 --> 00:50:50.119
more so.

880
00:50:50.400 --> 00:50:56.159
Yeah, although have you seen mention of people turning to

881
00:50:56.639 --> 00:50:58.360
another platform called blue Sky.

882
00:50:58.599 --> 00:51:01.599
Absolutely lot of people that are taking a look at that.

883
00:51:01.840 --> 00:51:03.880
Who knows well that will spiral into.

884
00:51:04.199 --> 00:51:05.960
I was gonna say, but then eventually will that turned

885
00:51:06.000 --> 00:51:07.199
into the new Facebook?

886
00:51:07.760 --> 00:51:08.320
What were you saying?

887
00:51:08.760 --> 00:51:12.079
And then become No, I have an account on blue Sky.

888
00:51:12.159 --> 00:51:16.280
I haven't quite figured out how to how to make

889
00:51:16.280 --> 00:51:18.519
it interest, how to how to how to set it

890
00:51:18.599 --> 00:51:23.880
up so that it captures my attention, okay, which maybe

891
00:51:23.920 --> 00:51:27.039
means their algorithms aren't as good as the Facebook algorithms.

892
00:51:28.400 --> 00:51:31.440
Okay, yes, stick to fuzzy kiddies and unicorns. I mean,

893
00:51:31.440 --> 00:51:33.199
it's just the way to do it. Or saying hi

894
00:51:33.239 --> 00:51:35.800
to your friends from Portabayart. Guess where I am today?

895
00:51:36.320 --> 00:51:41.440
You know, exactly right like this, you know, like and subscribe.

896
00:51:41.480 --> 00:51:45.480
That's all we say, Aaron, if you do a.

897
00:51:45.400 --> 00:51:48.360
Good job of identifying these things that I am intolerant

898
00:51:48.400 --> 00:51:52.000
of and that I have no time for at sixty.

899
00:51:52.679 --> 00:51:56.440
So, Aaron, exactly if you were a teacher, If you

900
00:51:56.440 --> 00:51:59.159
were a teacher, maybe you are an educator, if you

901
00:51:59.159 --> 00:52:03.920
could teach a subject or an age group, what might

902
00:52:04.199 --> 00:52:04.800
that be?

903
00:52:04.880 --> 00:52:09.079
Well, I I am a teacher. Oh wow, sorry, it's

904
00:52:09.119 --> 00:52:10.679
a side thing that I do.

905
00:52:12.639 --> 00:52:17.079
And you know, I'm currently teaching psychiatry or what they

906
00:52:17.119 --> 00:52:23.039
call behavioral medicine to a class of physician assistant students

907
00:52:23.639 --> 00:52:27.360
in Oakland. And this is something I've done probably for

908
00:52:27.519 --> 00:52:32.960
the last seven years, one semester, one semester out of

909
00:52:33.000 --> 00:52:37.000
the year, one evening a week and I enjoy that.

910
00:52:37.360 --> 00:52:39.199
And so you know, what are the age of those

911
00:52:39.239 --> 00:52:41.719
students their thirties and forties.

912
00:52:41.320 --> 00:52:45.760
And I think, you know that's that's an age that

913
00:52:45.960 --> 00:52:49.800
I like. Now the question is what if.

914
00:52:49.679 --> 00:52:53.119
I just kind of went outside of my mind, you know,

915
00:52:53.159 --> 00:52:58.360
outside of my professional life, and wanted to teach something

916
00:52:58.480 --> 00:53:04.360
else political side, This might be an interesting one. You know,

917
00:53:04.440 --> 00:53:06.800
I would probably have to do some of my own

918
00:53:06.960 --> 00:53:11.320
self education before I, you know, wanted to teach other people.

919
00:53:11.480 --> 00:53:16.039
But you know, I am someone who's kind of, outside

920
00:53:16.039 --> 00:53:17.840
of psychiatry.

921
00:53:18.559 --> 00:53:23.559
Been politically minded politics, public policy.

922
00:53:24.480 --> 00:53:28.239
That's probably not only probably in reality, that's part of

923
00:53:28.239 --> 00:53:32.960
what drew me to psychiatry or community based psychiatry as

924
00:53:33.000 --> 00:53:39.559
a field, is their few parts of medicine where you

925
00:53:39.639 --> 00:53:46.599
have that intersection between medicine, treatment, politics, and public policy.

926
00:53:47.519 --> 00:53:51.159
That changed five years ago where you know, are you know,

927
00:53:51.199 --> 00:53:55.599
infectious disease specialists became very political for a few moments,

928
00:53:56.480 --> 00:53:59.639
you know, during the COVID nineteen pandemic and they got

929
00:53:59.639 --> 00:54:02.800
to experience you know, that interface between you know, medicine

930
00:54:02.800 --> 00:54:05.760
and public policy in a way that you know, I've

931
00:54:05.760 --> 00:54:10.480
been experiencing, you know, my entire career. But honestly that

932
00:54:10.480 --> 00:54:13.039
that is one of the things that drew me to psychiatry,

933
00:54:13.079 --> 00:54:17.079
and especially public psychiatry, is how it exists on that

934
00:54:17.639 --> 00:54:20.880
interface with politics. And so if I were going to

935
00:54:21.960 --> 00:54:26.119
let go of the psychiatry piece, maybe the policy politic

936
00:54:26.199 --> 00:54:28.280
piece would be something that I want to teach.

937
00:54:29.079 --> 00:54:31.679
I think that's incredibly important, considering so most people don't

938
00:54:31.719 --> 00:54:33.639
know how the House and Senate work, that most people

939
00:54:33.679 --> 00:54:36.920
don't know how we build laws or pass them. I

940
00:54:36.960 --> 00:54:39.440
think it's incredibly valuable for people if there was an

941
00:54:39.480 --> 00:54:43.079
interest in it, for most people to learn how government

942
00:54:43.159 --> 00:54:45.719
actually works and how we can affect it to work

943
00:54:45.760 --> 00:54:48.519
for us, as opposed to just talking about it on

944
00:54:48.599 --> 00:54:51.440
Facebook and not being knowledgeable.

945
00:54:52.000 --> 00:54:56.000
And where does conservatism come from? Where does liberalism come from?

946
00:54:56.360 --> 00:54:59.880
You know? Are we? Are we born that way?

947
00:55:01.119 --> 00:55:04.920
What are the life experiences that you know that might

948
00:55:05.519 --> 00:55:08.119
push someone in one direction versus another direction?

949
00:55:08.159 --> 00:55:11.639
All right, mister Fifer? How are we doing? We have

950
00:55:11.880 --> 00:55:12.639
with questions?

951
00:55:13.000 --> 00:55:16.119
I know I have some stupid ones that I'm not gonna.

952
00:55:18.480 --> 00:55:19.800
Oh, come on, I like stupid.

953
00:55:20.079 --> 00:55:22.119
Okay, good. If someone were to play you in a movie,

954
00:55:22.119 --> 00:55:27.880
who would it be? Oh geez, see.

955
00:55:27.239 --> 00:55:30.119
Blanking on his name? But give me the movie? Who

956
00:55:30.159 --> 00:55:33.239
is the actor that played doctor Frankenfurter.

957
00:55:32.840 --> 00:55:34.400
In Tim Curry?

958
00:55:34.639 --> 00:55:36.440
Oh, Tim, Tim Curry and Curry.

959
00:55:36.599 --> 00:55:38.920
People told me from time to time that I resemble

960
00:55:39.039 --> 00:55:42.039
Tim Curry. And I'm not sure. I've never quite taken

961
00:55:42.079 --> 00:55:45.800
that as a compliment, but let's go with Tim Curry.

962
00:55:47.320 --> 00:55:48.880
But I think Gary, are we good? Do you think

963
00:55:48.920 --> 00:55:49.440
we got it?

964
00:55:50.239 --> 00:55:52.760
I think it's good. We had a really good conversation.

965
00:55:53.679 --> 00:55:58.480
So thank you Eric for joining us yet again, our

966
00:55:58.519 --> 00:56:03.039
superstar guest again. Welcome to the club and look forward

967
00:56:03.119 --> 00:56:05.920
to seeing you here somewhere in the city at some point.

968
00:56:06.760 --> 00:56:07.599
We'll make that happen.

969
00:56:08.360 --> 00:56:10.320
Alrighty, all righty, thank you so much.

970
00:56:10.320 --> 00:56:12.199
Thank you later and Don good to see you again.

971
00:56:12.320 --> 00:56:22.480
Yeah you too, take care of Hi. Hey, everybody, it's

972
00:56:22.480 --> 00:56:25.920
Don from Don and Gary Doing Sixty. Unfortunately, for our

973
00:56:25.960 --> 00:56:28.599
closing segment, we have lost the audio and the visual

974
00:56:28.599 --> 00:56:31.320
feed that was originally recorded with both of us, but

975
00:56:31.519 --> 00:56:35.039
Gary has graciously and magnanimously allowed me to record this

976
00:56:35.079 --> 00:56:37.639
one on my own. So we wanted to thank Aaron

977
00:56:38.159 --> 00:56:38.880
for joining us.

978
00:56:38.880 --> 00:56:39.400
You were great.

979
00:56:39.440 --> 00:56:42.360
Aeron, please come back and join us. You're welcome anytime.

980
00:56:42.920 --> 00:56:45.880
Watchers and viewers of the podcast, thank you for joining

981
00:56:45.960 --> 00:56:47.920
us at Donn and Gary Doing sixty. We hope you

982
00:56:48.000 --> 00:56:50.639
enjoyed spending quality of time with us. Join us next

983
00:56:50.639 --> 00:56:54.559
time as we navigate the world at this age don't forget.

984
00:56:54.599 --> 00:56:57.320
You can always find us at Apple Podcasts and Spotify,

985
00:56:57.679 --> 00:57:00.440
on Instagram at Don and Gary Doing sixty and of

986
00:57:00.440 --> 00:57:03.639
course on YouTube on the five for pods under Don

987
00:57:03.719 --> 00:57:06.519
and Gary Doing sixty. If you'd like to contact us,

988
00:57:06.599 --> 00:57:10.239
email us at Don and garydoin sixty at gmail dot com.

989
00:57:10.239 --> 00:57:13.559
Thanks for your patience. Sorry for the technical difficulties. They'll

990
00:57:13.599 --> 00:57:16.360
probably happen again, but we'll see you next time. We

991
00:57:16.400 --> 00:57:19.320
have lots of defot episodes coming in. They're in the canon,

992
00:57:19.440 --> 00:57:21.079
ready to go. Talk to you soon.

993
00:57:21.320 --> 00:57:21.559
Five