How the Tongue Ruins Relationships

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Summary

In this episode of the 313 Men Money and Marriage podcast, host Andrew Johnson discusses the significant impact of words on relationships, particularly how the tongue can ruin marriages. He explores various communication styles that can be damaging, such as passive aggression, flamethrowers, and the silent treatment. Johnson emphasizes the importance of understanding why we use hurtful words and offers practical tools for healthier communication, including the five-second rule and assertive communication techniques. The episode concludes with a reminder of the importance of creating a safe emotional space in relationships.

Takeaways

• Words can destroy relationships regardless of their duration.
• The tongue, though small, can cause immense emotional damage.
• Passive aggression is a dangerous communication style.
• Flamethrowers bring up past mistakes during arguments.
• Silence can be a form of manipulation in relationships.
• We often lash out when we feel cornered or attacked.
• Learned behaviors from childhood can affect adult relationships.
• Using 'I statements' can improve communication.
• The 'think filter' can help in responding thoughtfully.
• Creating a safe emotional space is crucial for relationship recovery.

• The Tongue: A Relationship's Worst Enemy
• Words Matter: The Impact of Communication

• "The tongue can ruin a relationship."
• "Once you say it, it's out there."
• "Use the five second rule before responding."

Chapters

00:00 Introduction to the Podcast and Topic

01:31 The Power of Words in Relationships

04:08 Understanding Passive Aggression

08:51 The Flamethrower Communication Style

11:34 The Silent Treatment and Its Impact

13:15 Why We Use Hurtful Words

14:52 Tools for Healthy Communication

19:54 Conclusion and Resources