Jan. 24, 2026
Why Marriage Isn’t For Her with Golnesa “GG” Gharachedaghi
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RSS Feed The Valley: Persian Style star Golnesa “GG” is spilling on lessons learned from divorce, why she’s contemplated polyamory, and her choice to be a single mom.
Plus, what male Bravo-lebrity would she hook up with? She’s telling Kelly who she’s got her eye on!
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00:00:19
Speaker 1: Hey I do Part two. It's your Celebrity Mentor, your favorite celebrity mentor Kelly ben Simon. And today I'm so excited to chat with a woman who, like all of us on this podcast, has gone through her own broken relationships and is a complete open book, which we love. She's an incredible single mom. She's stunning and you can see her sharing her life on the new Bravo show The Valley Persian Style. It's Golanessa aka Gigi because you're so unfiltered, which I love about you on The Valley Persian Style. You're doing such a great job and you are so gorgeous and so real, and I have so much fun watching you. All my friends are obsessed. Let's talk about marriage today.
00:01:07
Speaker 2: Oh your thought lay it on me.
00:01:11
Speaker 1: Just let's go right into it. What are your thoughts about marriage? Would you get married again?
00:01:17
Speaker 2: Okay?
00:01:17
Speaker 3: So I think the reason it's so easy for me to get married is because I.
00:01:22
Speaker 2: Don't believe in marriage.
00:01:24
Speaker 3: To me, it's not like a sanctity, it's not anything special.
00:01:29
Speaker 2: It's to me, it's ridiculous.
00:01:32
Speaker 3: It's the worst business contract I've ever read in my life. Is someone who loves to be in business. It doesn't make sense the contract of marriage. So I'm against it. So for me, it's fun to play around with it a little bit. I'm sorry. These dogs are just ridiculous. This is what I'm married to.
00:01:50
Speaker 2: This is marriage.
00:01:51
Speaker 1: Yes, you are married to love. I see that. But give me a little recap on your relationship history so that the listeners like kind of you know, get a sense of what we're talking about. Oh my gosh, they're so cute.
00:02:03
Speaker 3: Well, I just I think that for me, it's very hard to date. I'm a very independent woman. I use this ferm donor to have a child, you know. So for me, it's a clear indicator that I'm not looking for attachment from a man.
00:02:17
Speaker 2: I'm looking to fulfill my own needs.
00:02:19
Speaker 3: And I'm not saying a man doesn't fulfill that need. It's just I need it in doses, if that makes sense. So I really would appreciate a man who's busy, a businessman who's constantly on the go, and maybe a long distance kind of a relationship, you know, something that's not in your face the way Bob is always in my face like this, you see this, this is this.
00:02:41
Speaker 2: I just can't I just can't love. I thank you one minute. This is what I deal with.
00:02:47
Speaker 1: But look at which they love you. Look at much love you bring to these a beautiful animals. Look at that. That is amazing. You know it's interesting because you know, I mean, you have had a longer time on television, and so have I. But I also am looking for someone who's independent because I have a very big life, and you know, I wear a lot of hats and I do a lot of things. I travel a lot. So for me, being in someone who's independent is really really important. But it's also difficult because there's a push and pull that I want them to be independent and I also have my independence, but I also need I'm also a very loving person and look, I mean you are too obviously look at you how you are with these beautiful, beautiful dogs. So I think that's one thing that we have in common, is that we do want that kindness and attention and love, but we also need to know what we need to do. So how long, just for the listeners, how long have you been on television? How many years?
00:03:48
Speaker 2: Since twenty eleven? So fifteen years?
00:03:51
Speaker 1: Okay, so literally like almost like you know, half of your life.
00:03:56
Speaker 3: I would love for you to say half my life. I'm forty four, so I would love all for.
00:04:00
Speaker 2: You to say half my life.
00:04:01
Speaker 1: I mean, you're gorgeous and young andrge I mean I just think like I'll take you girl. Yes, okay, you don't look forty four. You're blessed with beauty. But doctor, let's just say and good doctor. But let's just let's just for the listeners to say, so half of your life because obviously when you were younger, you were young, but like your from your twenties to your thirties to your forties, you've been on TV. So how does that How do you feel? Has that been good for you? Has that been hard for you? Like? Lay that out?
00:04:31
Speaker 2: It's arollably above. I think you know as you know.
00:04:33
Speaker 3: It's it's it opens the door to a lot of opportunities, both positive opportunities and difficult opportunities. You are supposed to be as vulnerable as you can be and transparent as you can be, knowing that the whole world is going to attack every single one of those vulnerabilities.
00:04:52
Speaker 2: So it's kind of like a damned if you do, damned if you don't.
00:04:55
Speaker 3: It's it's I like to call it a mind because to me, that's the best way I see it. Yeah, but when you live in your truth, you know that judgment is going to happen, regardless of there being a camera and an audience or not. I've always lived my life a little bit differently than most people, which I guess makes me.
00:05:14
Speaker 2: Great for TV, you know, but it is exhausting. It's a lot.
00:05:18
Speaker 3: Now that I have a five year old son, it's a different tier of thought process and anxiety and worry.
00:05:27
Speaker 1: Do you think it's difficult to date because you have a son? Do you think it's difficult because you're on TV?
00:05:34
Speaker 2: I think being in LA is what makes it difficult.
00:05:36
Speaker 3: I think statistically, LA is probably one of the most difficult places to find.
00:05:41
Speaker 2: Any substance in a man here.
00:05:45
Speaker 3: I think people sort of migrate to LA with an ulterior motive of whether it's acting, modeling, TV, whatever it is. People don't just have a lot of culture in LA. The culture here is opportunity and everything, and everyone is a ladder. My guards are up because I'm on TV. I get nervous about that. Where does someone go? You know? I was asking Jeff Lewis because he's like, why are you saying I'm like, where does someone go in LA to meet someone?
00:06:12
Speaker 2: I would love to know.
00:06:13
Speaker 1: I really like what you just said about the latter, because that's not just in LA, by the way, that's everywhere. And when you are when you do put yourself out in a situation like we do, and you are authentic, You're much more authentic than I ever was. But I was on TV and like the Ice Age, and I just, you know, as you know, were watching some of the things you said yesterday and the things you're saying again today, like about your truth and knowing who you are and all those things are really really important. And I feel like a lot of people because you are so real that they're like I think, don't think that you actually are. You are and you are real. So are you dating?
00:06:49
Speaker 2: I'm not, I'm not. But again, I hate to keep writing.
00:06:51
Speaker 3: I feel like I've been mentioning Jeff Lewis's name constantly. He really sort of opened my eyes to it a little bit, saying, you know, I haven't been and dating. You know, my son's almost six years old, and I'm ready to sort of meet a partner. He's old enough to where like it's okay if my parents babysit, you know, if I need to go spend time with someone to get to.
00:07:12
Speaker 2: Know them, and so I don't know how.
00:07:14
Speaker 3: And I went out and I bought an iPad because I wanted to join Riah because apparently Riyah is exclusive to Apple and I have a Samsung phone, so I want to boyd and I'm on.
00:07:25
Speaker 2: The wait list. I could put you on because I didn't want them.
00:07:28
Speaker 3: Have my contact list. They're like, we need your contact list to get referrals. I'm like, I don't want to open my contact list. I didn't know what that meant.
00:07:35
Speaker 1: Right well, just so, just like Ria, in order to be on ride, you have to give them the contact list so they can see, like who you're friends with. That's part of their algorithm is connecting you with people that you know, which is good and bad.
00:07:49
Speaker 2: I don't want to date everyone I know. I've already in my phone.
00:07:52
Speaker 1: They'll say, like people that you have in common, so it's not just like random people that you would have no idea who they are, do you know what I mean. I'm happy to help you with that, so your DMS people slide into your DMS.
00:08:07
Speaker 3: I'm private on my DM stuff. I don't look at my dms.
00:08:12
Speaker 2: I can't. There's so many come through, and like.
00:08:15
Speaker 3: You said, that whole authenticity kind of factor that I have, I get a lot of backlash. So if I were to go through all the d ms, I would be setting myself up for a major depression.
00:08:27
Speaker 1: I know. I mean, I still get a lot of really really wild stuff on Instagram and on TikTok. But I I kept because you know, I'm single. So I'm like, okay, I have to you know, my applications are open. I have to see like who's who's interesting? And you know, you never know. Like I was on, I was on, I was on a pod and I was and I was like, hey, you know, maybe I'll just slid into Kevin Cosners.
00:08:55
Speaker 2: Oh okay, So I.
00:08:57
Speaker 1: Did like if like who's person? Like why is he coming into my ideas? But I was like, you know what, who cares? Like have I don't have anything to lose? H Okay, Let's talk about the Bravo universe. Are there any guys on you know, in the Bravo universe that you would be interested in talking to? Like shit or.
00:09:30
Speaker 3: Been there dead now with Chab like Shepp is like a great time to me. I think he's so so intelligent, and he really turns me on to.
00:09:40
Speaker 2: Intellect is a big thing for me. I'm very safe. You're sexual, so like Shep is a hottie.
00:09:45
Speaker 3: No, there was only one guy I think really, you know, hook up worthy and smart enough to be like turned on by it. He's not on Bravo anymore. But Mauricio Marisi is a very handsome man. And I mean it's because we're from l A. We all have the same friends. My best Jay is his boss.
00:10:06
Speaker 2: You know, his bosses's boss, so it's kind of he's he's a hotty.
00:10:12
Speaker 1: He is very attractive. He is very attractive. Okay, well so Whitney and I back in the day when on a couple of dead dates before he even started Southern Charm and during Bravocan, I met Captain Jason and he like hops into my GM. Damn my GM, my DM sometimes and I'm like.
00:10:32
Speaker 2: Oh, he's thet man in the whole. Oh he's one of my dear friends. I love him dearly.
00:10:39
Speaker 3: But he is I think, very similar to me, very flirty by nature, so it's really easy to think he's being flirtatious. He's just so open and so loving. So but he's he's the kindest.
00:10:54
Speaker 1: He is such and the way he talks about his daughter is just so beautiful, and I just think he's so great. Wait, let's get back to ritio, because I'm kind of like feeling the vibe now, dark hair, beautiful and I love that you're sacheo sexual because I am very much like that too. Like I I like fall in love. I've only fallen in loved once, but I fall into heavy attraction. When men are smart, it makes me like it just ignites me. I'm like a great agree.
00:11:24
Speaker 3: That's why for me, I think that dating apps never appealed to me.
00:11:29
Speaker 2: This is my first time of trying to join rias ever, because I can't look at a picture and judge.
00:11:34
Speaker 3: For me, as soon as someone's smart, they've become the hottest guy in the room, So just judging them by their face and criteria doesn't do it for me.
00:11:42
Speaker 1: You know, do you feel like the guys that you have been in relationship with in the past were smart?
00:11:47
Speaker 3: Oh gosh, No, No, I don't think I wanted to date my type.
00:11:52
Speaker 2: Yeah.
00:11:53
Speaker 3: No, I didn't want to date my type until recently. It's only been you know now that I'm a mom and I have my life together. Before I was the type of person every four months, I dumped the guy and I went and found a new one. As soon as they were getting to the point where I love you, I'm starting to, you know, have these strong feelings. It was, you know, I ran, I ran, and I was getting a high off of that mental stimulation, that rush that people get from the beginning of relationships. And I didn't realize I was chasing that, you know, and I was serving this internal ego of mine to kind of.
00:12:28
Speaker 2: Conquer, and that was very different.
00:12:32
Speaker 3: I think I think I looked a little bit more for vulnerable men at that point because I needed to have that feeling of conquering.
00:12:39
Speaker 2: Note now I.
00:12:40
Speaker 3: Know exactly what I need. I need to be stimulated mentally. I need to be have someone so humble and generous to put me in my place in the most beautiful way, if that makes sense, and it's hard to find.
00:12:54
Speaker 1: I just find it interesting that you said, because most there's like there, they talk about like chasing and attracting, and you're talking You're not talking about chasing and attracting men. You're talking about chasing and attracting that feeling, which I think is really interesting and very honest of you. I mean, I can understand that too. I mean I went through moments when I was just kind of I wasn't. I was just looking for that feeling I wanted because I was like working so much and raising my two kids on my own that when I was when I was around certain, you know, different kinds of men, I was always gravitating towards. I wouldn't say the bad guy, but the.
00:13:33
Speaker 2: Wrong guy, right, the wrong one, the temporary ones.
00:13:37
Speaker 1: Right, yes, the temporary and I I never I never really thought about that until just listening to you right now. It's a drugug, Yes, it's a total drug. It's total drug. What about younger men? Do you have any thoughts on that?
00:13:49
Speaker 2: No, it doesn't do it for me.
00:13:52
Speaker 3: I think I need an older gentleman that has already been married, has kids, and is not really longing for those goals and has different sets of goals in their minds with partnership and growth and their businesses and maybe establishing businesses. For me, that is my goal when I look at a relationship. So I would like for them to have experienced those things to know what it feels like to be married, to know what it feels like to have their own children, and then to be able to experience life together and a different perspective.
00:14:25
Speaker 1: It's interesting because yesterday I was kind of talking about like the things that I that I was looking for, and I used to always say, first, I always wanted to have more kids. That was my whole thing. That's the reason I got divorced, is because I want to have more kids for my kids, to have a family. And then I would say, I want to have this gorgeous family for my family, like I have the taglines I have like relationship taglines. And then yesterday I was like, wait, what am I doing. I'm setting myself up for these huge expectations of like trying to create this big family narrative of this culture, this gorgeousness. Like it's just too much. It's too much of an expectation for me. Why can't I just find someone or be with someone who is just interested in like being like, you know, a love partner in crime. That's really what I'm looking for. So it's just kind of like it's just fascinating talking, she said, because we're really kind of like on the same path. I mean, I'm older than you are, but we are in this same kind of like life path, and I think it's really really interesting love. What about Love Hotel? Would you ever go on Bravo's Love Hotel?
00:15:27
Speaker 3: You know, I've never been interested in wanting to do all these other types of shows before, but the Love Hotel definitely sparked my interest because that is up my alley. I'm not into the traders and the competition things.
00:15:39
Speaker 2: I don't have it in me to do that stuff.
00:15:42
Speaker 3: Yeah, but Love Hotel, I have it in me to meet a bunch of gorgeous men in a beautiful place.
00:15:48
Speaker 1: Of course, sign me up, Kelly wait, I need to manifest the two of us a love Hotel. The two of us were like each other's wing woman like, don't do this, my god, don't. Yes, then Maritzu, I'm like, there, there she is.
00:16:02
Speaker 3: We'll be fighting over the the Einstein in the room. We'll get test for the final decision.
00:16:08
Speaker 1: I feel like Gigi's not smart enough. He's not smart.
00:16:10
Speaker 2: You're not for you.
00:16:16
Speaker 1: Do you feel that? Okay, So we were talking before at the top about how your first marriage was seven weeks then you got divorced and your second marriage was ten days and then annulled. So sorry, I'm sorry, sorry about both of those. I mean really like that just like broke yesterday. When I was watching you talk about it, I could just see and I could hear the flutter in your voice. I'm like, literally, I'm like emotional about it right now. I like, I'm like, so, I'm so happy where you are today, but I'm so sad that you had to go through that. Do you feel like marriage has been too constricting to you? For you for you to you?
00:16:51
Speaker 3: Maybe both times I got married for different reasons, never for the fact of getting married to the person, which which sex. To say, I don't know if there's a world in which marriage would ever be something that's real for me, I don't know. I'm not going to say no. But with my first ex, I loved him very much. I still love him very We still talk all the time. You know, he lives in Florida. But we had the best relationship he and I. I really did love him, and I was worried that he was, you know, going to get deported and whatnot, and I was like willing to do what I had to do. At that time, I thought you know, I don't want to lose you, and so let's, you know, get married. He really wanted a wife the next day and it was not in my pingo cards. So it was just very tough and it turned into a very long.
00:17:46
Speaker 2: And bitter divorce process.
00:17:48
Speaker 3: But I kept the ring in the end, which he was like that was his excuse to fight for. But I know I was just he was hurt and I did hurt him. It was a little rough the way I did things.
00:18:01
Speaker 1: Wait, if you don't mind me asking, because I know that you're so honest, how did you do things? You just were like, I can't be your wife.
00:18:07
Speaker 2: I can't, yeah, very honest every day?
00:18:11
Speaker 1: Or what define wife? I want to know what your definition is of a wife in that scenario.
00:18:18
Speaker 3: Well, I don't want to live with the person, and if we live together, I do need to have like my own separate room, my own separate wing like you don't. When I travel with a boyfriend, I always want my own room.
00:18:28
Speaker 2: Like I can't. I just can't share my space. I'm very weird.
00:18:32
Speaker 3: It sucks because I have four animals and if they're not all on the bed with me, I can't sleep. But if a man is next to me.
00:18:39
Speaker 2: I'm like, so I do just want that space.
00:18:42
Speaker 3: And I think I'm just very brutally honest with my first ex SL. I remember one time because I was traveling a lot at that time, and I was filming the show and just doing so many things, and I said like, if I'm not around, you know, and you're out, you're with the boys.
00:18:59
Speaker 2: And the like a hot chick or something. I was like, I don't mind if you I was like, as long as no one sees.
00:19:05
Speaker 3: It, yeah, And he got so upset with me. He lost his because he assumed that that meant I wanted.
00:19:16
Speaker 2: To go do that in his mind.
00:19:18
Speaker 3: I was like, no, I'm just saying, like, guys have needs. I don't get jealous by stuff like that, so it's fine.
00:19:25
Speaker 2: He's like, what are you talking about?
00:19:28
Speaker 1: So are you interested in polyamory or I thought I was.
00:19:32
Speaker 3: I thought I was interested in the body relationship for a while, and I started exploring that route, and I think, just because I don't get jealous of things, I thought that that's what it was.
00:19:43
Speaker 2: But it's I don't think it's for me.
00:19:45
Speaker 3: I think I just need a man who understands that I need space sometimes I need a little bit of understanding that I'm I've been in my alpha for so long that I do want to bring it down. And I need someone who's so secure in his alpha that he's able to tap into his femininity to bring.
00:20:05
Speaker 2: That out of me. And I think when I'm not fighting anymore than I believe that, right.
00:20:12
Speaker 3: But it's true though, Like it's so hard to find a man who's so in his secure in his alpha that he can tap into his femininity.
00:20:19
Speaker 1: So are you a dismissive avoidant? Is that your attachment style?
00:20:22
Speaker 3: Or Patti Stanger hates me because she's like that cannot be your attachment style. I'm just I love space, I love I love I love language is words of affirmation. I need words of praise and gifts. It's a big one for me, and I know all the girls I love gifts. No, no, no, I need it. Yeah.
00:20:47
Speaker 2: I'm a Sagittarius.
00:20:48
Speaker 1: Oh you're a Sagittarius. I'm a Taurus. That's interesting. My son's a Taurus because usually sagittarius As are like more like active service and not necessarily gifts. But that's interesting. So do you think this? I mean, I'm not a therapist. I'm not trying to be I'm just curious because, like, your relationship with your dad seems just so seems so loving and kind, and he obviously was very nurturing towards you. Do you think it's because you had such an amazing father that you want this independence.
00:21:17
Speaker 2: Oh that's a great question.
00:21:19
Speaker 3: Yeah.
00:21:20
Speaker 2: I have two cats.
00:21:21
Speaker 3: I have one African Serbil and one regular cat. I don't know where they are. I'm getting a pig too. I've appried for a pig, so I'll have.
00:21:28
Speaker 2: A pig soon.
00:21:31
Speaker 3: I think having a really great dad makes it a little difficult to, you know, want to find a man.
00:21:37
Speaker 2: They always say girls marry their fathers. Right. He's definitely set the bar very high for me.
00:21:44
Speaker 3: He's always been very open and understanding of what I need and what makes me happy. And there was another pressure in my household to get married. When my sister was in our twenties and wanted to get married, my parents were trying to talk her out of it. You know, They're like, I don't know, Oh wait, you're young, like go travel the world.
00:22:00
Speaker 2: World.
00:22:00
Speaker 3: Yeah, it does make it a little hard to amount to that. But in the same breath, when you have something so great to look up to. Isn't that what we're supposed to strive towards, you know, the next best thing.
00:22:16
Speaker 1: What did your parents think about when you conceived Elijah from IVF and a sperm donor was your How did that? How did that land for your family?
00:22:25
Speaker 3: I knew that when I got to a certain age and my health was under control, because I have a very aggressive autoimmune disease and I've had it since I was twenty seven years old. So the types of medications and you know, infusions and injections that I have to be on, it's very scary.
00:22:45
Speaker 2: You can't be pregnant, you can't do all that.
00:22:47
Speaker 3: So once my health was really good, and I'm like, you know, I'm getting older, I'm, you know, thirty something years old.
00:22:57
Speaker 2: I need to get this process started. So I did.
00:23:00
Speaker 3: By the time, you know, I was thirty nine, I had my son. But that didn't go easily. My first round of IVF, I got pregnant and while I was filming a scene, I just started getting this extreme pain and an hour later, I'm in the o R getting you know, transferred over, getting my both my flopian tubes removed. I had an atopic usure, which doesn't happen during IVF because they bypassed the fallopian tubes to do IVF. So they think because of my autoimmune my philippion tubes were working as sections and probably just sucked the embryo in and so I lost both my Filippian tubes. The last thing I remember, I was a nurse about my head having me sign a form and I was like a little sedatea.
00:23:46
Speaker 2: I'm like, what are you talking about.
00:23:47
Speaker 3: She's like, the state requires you to sign that you were sterilizing yourself.
00:23:52
Speaker 2: And I just remember signing and then just going out.
00:23:56
Speaker 3: So three months later, I got pregnant with my son, Elijah.
00:23:59
Speaker 2: I I knew the goal was to have a child. I didn't care what was going to happen, and I knew I had to.
00:24:06
Speaker 3: But when I was about five months pregnant, my host got really bad and I had to begin medications that were safe during pregnancy, but we got to a point where I had to just induce early and he was born the first month of the COVID quarantine. So it was very weird time. And then you know, they saw my.
00:24:26
Speaker 2: Babies healthy, they kicked us out of the hospital. They're like get out of here, Get out of here. It's been great.
00:24:32
Speaker 3: I think COVID was a blessing to be at home and raise a child and just focus only on the kid.
00:24:38
Speaker 2: And I did that. So now here we are.
00:24:40
Speaker 3: He'll be six in April, and it's a whole different world.
00:24:45
Speaker 1: I mean, I cannot believe that you've been through. I just have to go back for one second. I mean, just being out of it and signing a document that says for a female to say that you're not able to have a child is or that you're not anymore. I can't even. I can't even outside of filming, and I can't even.
00:25:08
Speaker 2: I don't even.
00:25:09
Speaker 1: I don't even know what to say.
00:25:10
Speaker 3: I mean, I think every single woman who has experienced trying to have children or having children has experienced something traumatic or difficult, whether it's with the pregnancy, after the pregnancy, are raising your child. I'm not, you know, unique to anything. I That's why I humble myself very quickly and I say, I'm okay, I'm able to still get pregnant just through IVF.
00:25:37
Speaker 2: Why not I was already doing IVF to begin with.
00:25:39
Speaker 3: If I can do that, okay, Now I'm pretty much I hate to say this, but I'm a dumpster.
00:25:45
Speaker 2: You could just to me and I can't get pregnant anymore.
00:25:48
Speaker 1: Stop. I don't say thanks, you're not that you're not that well. But you know, way before I was in Housewives, I my children in my early thirties. Like you you were late theres, but I was in my early thirties and my old my youngest daughter, I thought that she was going to have some serious issues and I was very, very very concerned. And I always treated my body like a vessel for the girls, and I just was so concerned that my youngest daughter that was going to be that there was going to be an issue. And you know, like you just said, like you know, there's so many women that have been through these different experiences by raising, you know, having children, trying to have children, trying to get you know, get pregnant, raise children, raising children on their own. Just so there's you know, just it's the it's just there's a lot that's hard. What about I know that the IVF was was obviously so difficult, would you have her have any children or I mean obviously your health is it, you know, as an issue, but would you ever have any more children.
00:27:05
Speaker 3: I don't think I do want to have another child. I think I'm good where I'm at right now. My health is my main concern. I know, having an autoimmune disease is going to be a lifelong battle.
00:27:18
Speaker 2: It doesn't get cured, it doesn't go a wait. I actually just got back.
00:27:20
Speaker 3: From Columbia a couple of days ago, doing stuff cell treatment over there and some heeaning, you know, ceremonies and whatnot, to.
00:27:29
Speaker 2: Anything I can to make.
00:27:30
Speaker 3: My body better and stronger for my son. I think I chose a very unconventional route to have a child to begin with, so I want to focus as much as I can on making sure I create a really good, you know, hospital environment for him. Emotionally, he for the first time, you know, said to me, I wish I had a daddy, and it, I mean, it was a gut punch, and I wanted to immediately walk out of his and just walk away and pretend I didn't hear it. But I took a deep breath and I just sat down and I said, you wish you had a daddy? And he goes, yeah, And I said, well, what would you do if you had a daddy? What would you guys do together. And he started thinking about it, and he goes, I don't know, And I said, do you think any of those things that you might want to do with a daddy that I can do with you, or that pop up my dad.
00:28:25
Speaker 2: Can do with you?
00:28:27
Speaker 3: And he started thinking about it and then he just started watching TV and he changed the subject.
00:28:32
Speaker 2: But it was like it was one of those things.
00:28:35
Speaker 3: And I know that throughout his life, at different stages and ages, it's going to come in a different direction, in a different way. So I'm just trying to do everything I can to make sure he knows he's so loved by whoever he does have in his life, you know.
00:28:52
Speaker 2: But I don't wantays say, listen, some kids have two.
00:28:55
Speaker 3: Dads, some kids have two moms. And you know, one of his friends back in preschool a couple of years ago, the mother had died unfortunately of cancer, very young, and you know.
00:29:05
Speaker 2: So he was friends with the son. I said, you know, he doesn't have a mom right now.
00:29:10
Speaker 3: And so I try, but you know, what are you going to say to a five and a half year old which every movie you watch, every.
00:29:16
Speaker 2: Cartoon is Mommy and Daddy.
00:29:19
Speaker 3: You know, how do I explain that I don't know how you know, so every age and stage is different. But I'm really proud of so many women out there, and I see more and more women out there every day taking this upon themselves, the wanting a child so badly and knowing that they're going to give it. They're all and it's the best we can do is give it our all. That's all we could do.
00:29:41
Speaker 1: I mean, yes, yes, I'm just like so moved by you. I mean, you're just an incredible human. Oh my, I love you. So what advice would you give to other single moms that are listening right now?
00:29:56
Speaker 2: I don't know.
00:29:57
Speaker 3: I don't have any advice from I would take all the advice in the world. I'm humbul enough to know that I know.
00:30:03
Speaker 2: Nothing and I'm learning every day.
00:30:05
Speaker 3: And I'm one of those moms that loves the criticism. If you think I'm doing something wrong or if you like what I'm doing, I want to.
00:30:12
Speaker 2: Know about it. That's how I grow.
00:30:14
Speaker 3: So I think to moms, just be open all to hearing and accepting. You know, there are people's opinions, especially your children.
00:30:24
Speaker 2: I think it's really.
00:30:25
Speaker 3: Important that we listen to them and not want to assume you know what they're thinking and feeling and saying because I remember being a child and knowing that my parents were my heroes. So whatever they felt and said was godly to me. You know, So listen, listen to your kids.
00:30:44
Speaker 2: That's all I know.
00:30:46
Speaker 1: I mean, I love that because I feel the same way about my parents. They are they were my heroes, they still are my heroes. I think. One thing that's interesting is that going through this world being on television, like the microscope that you were talking about before, for is that there are so many women because we reach so many different women who have gone through a lot of different situations. And one thing that I've learned from just being on TV is that I and I continue to say this, like I love their criticism because I am like you, I want to be better. I don't want to just be like look at me, I'm a long grade right to do that, that's awful. I do want to grow and I do want to be better, and I think you know, you know, one thing I wanted to ask you about is that you know, because you did downe on this on your own, like who are your village? Because like for me, my village, my parents, my twin brother, my sister, my close friends, my Bravo community. That was my village. So who's your village?
00:31:45
Speaker 2: My parents are my village.
00:31:47
Speaker 3: My dad, especially my mom is in the you know, beginning middle phases of dimension and Alzheimer's, so it's a little trickier now, but I love that my son gets to spend time with her. But he and my dad, I think my dad internally feels this extra obligation to be that male role model in his life. My dad said one time he took my son to the park and the kid asked, my son, where's your dad? And he said, I don't have a dad, but I have a grandpa, and he pointed over.
00:32:21
Speaker 2: My dad said his heart just melted.
00:32:24
Speaker 3: And so I love hearing that because my dad's such a great male role model to look up to. So I'm just so blessed to have those two and I have a really good group of friends.
00:32:34
Speaker 2: Now they have their kids.
00:32:36
Speaker 3: Mjay, you know, her son is one year older than my son. And on the show you see my friend Natasha, she has three kids.
00:32:44
Speaker 2: So we're very close.
00:32:46
Speaker 3: I really like establishing his friendship bonds, you know, with people, And that's my village. You know, that's our animals. Our animals are very much a big part of our family. We treat them better than family sometimes. So you know, for Eli, he really when he he will say he misses his animals before he says he misses me, that's for sure. Anytime he goes to my parents' house, he goes, I want to go hug my animals.
00:33:15
Speaker 2: What about me? He's like, Okay.
00:33:18
Speaker 1: One thing that's interesting is that, like you love your son so much, and you love your family, and you love your animals so much, but the men don't. They don't have a space.
00:33:30
Speaker 3: That's like my whole storyline so far had been the fact that I had to downsize my house. And I had a six bedroom house when we were filming, and it was very big.
00:33:39
Speaker 2: I get it, it's just my son and I. But now I downsize to a five bedroom, it's it's still rather big.
00:33:46
Speaker 3: We have a Our backyard is much much bigger now, which is great, and it's you know, perfect space for a piggy And I've been wanting a pig for a couple of years. So I applied and I got approved. So the next step is bigger that.
00:34:00
Speaker 1: Out, you know, So we're I wanted. I want to get into the show because this is the Valley Persian Style is such a great show, and I want to hear everything that's coming up. But I did love when you said, you know, I want you have to buy a first class ticket to know what that feels. I'm getting chills because I love that when you said that. And the reason that I love that is because it's so important to believe that you belong in these places. There's I mean there's there's I just feel that there's a lot of people that say I'm not worthy, I'm not this, I'm this, and I'm not giving, like they're defining themselves like crazy. But you're saying, if you've been there once.
00:34:46
Speaker 2: You long and again once you get a taste.
00:34:49
Speaker 1: And that and I love that. I was just like, that is so great. That is so great.
00:34:53
Speaker 2: I love when I heard Steve Harvey say it, it makes so much sense.
00:34:57
Speaker 3: I was like, well, that's a smart man. I mean, it makes sense. There's a lot of people who can't afford it, but everyone can save enough money one year.
00:35:05
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, metaphor, it's not about the first class ticket. It's about a moment or something that's to you that you would like to do that you've always thought about doing and whatever?
00:35:15
Speaker 2: That right that?
00:35:16
Speaker 1: So can you give us some tea? What is going to happen on the show? You guys are like, oh my god, opposite bedrooms, Like what's going on in the marriages? Like friends are more more bonded than the husbands of the line, Like what is going on?
00:35:32
Speaker 2: It's wild.
00:35:33
Speaker 3: We are in Palm Springs right now in the episodes, and oh my gosh, complete havoc broke loose in Palm Springs and I'll just tell you this. Somebody ended up jumping into an uber from Palm Springs at midnight and going back home to La by theirselves.
00:35:53
Speaker 2: So it was a lot went down.
00:35:57
Speaker 3: It's it's one of those like grab the popcorn, grab your seat else, because it's kind of it's one of those moments between remember you and Bethany that whole showdown, and oh my god, this is that. This is that you guys painted the road we're following in your footsteps.
00:36:14
Speaker 2: This is that moment.
00:36:18
Speaker 1: Like you're mean to me.
00:36:19
Speaker 2: I'm up here, you mean, you're right, I'm like.
00:36:23
Speaker 1: What is happening? Who is this person? How about? I mean, I'm jumping all over the place, but just from just going talking about the show, Reza and his husband, their relationship, I mean, talk about an iconic relationship. What can I do for you? If a man said what can I do for you? I'd be like what No one nobody has ever said what what they can do for me? They're always like what can you do for me?
00:36:49
Speaker 2: Right?
00:36:50
Speaker 3: No, I think they've really set the tone for a lot of couples and this doesn't come easily. Those two have put a lot of work into their marriage.
00:36:59
Speaker 2: They have been do you know, therapy together separately. They have really really put in the work.
00:37:05
Speaker 3: So it's really beautiful when you get to see those moments, the results of putting in the work and what it looks like, you know, being receptive to your significant other.
00:37:15
Speaker 2: It's really nice. Listen.
00:37:16
Speaker 3: I'm not saying they don't still get into it like regular couples. One hundred percent communication. When you learn how to hear your partner, it's a life changer.
00:37:27
Speaker 1: That seems to be a big theme this summer. This summer this season too, is about communication, just with with relationships. One thing I really liked was like the handholding of like, what what can I do and what you the rest of prosity. We were talking before about love language. I think that people say with their love languages, but then they don't this. This is a moment where it's like I need physical touch. I need more physical touch. I mean it's just so funny, so funny, He's like, touch my body.
00:37:56
Speaker 2: Yeah.
00:37:58
Speaker 1: But I just think that that's like the communication is something that I saw was like really really really like this common theme with everyone, and the good thing that I love about you is that you are such a great communicator. When people are talking about your home and all the situations that are going on with your life, you are like, what are you saying? Why are you saying it? Not because you're like confronting them, but you're like, tell me what's going on, because you're like, I want to be better, Like what can I do to be better?
00:38:28
Speaker 3: Yeah?
00:38:28
Speaker 2: I sadly know how I could fix things, Like let me know the better part. Yeah, I'm okay exactly.
00:38:33
Speaker 1: I just want to fix things.
00:38:34
Speaker 3: I feel like with most of America having experienced bad credit at some point in their lives, it just felt like I was being penalized for having bad credit, and I thought it was just a very human thing.
00:38:46
Speaker 2: I've messed up here and there, I've got bad credit.
00:38:49
Speaker 1: But the interesting thing when people don't understand a bad credit is that you're still working and you're still making money. It's not like you're not working. It's not like you're not writing and not making money. But just bad credit. I mean, yes, it's it happens all the time.
00:39:03
Speaker 2: It does. And that's the interesting thing.
00:39:06
Speaker 3: Like you just said, having money and having bad credit are two separate, completely separate things. I missed some payments, I you know, messed up on a couple of things, and I'm that's okay. I'm not ashamed of that. I don't think anyone should be shamed for that.
00:39:22
Speaker 2: So yeah, I wasn't affected by have a bad credit.
00:39:25
Speaker 3: I was just affected on why is everyone talking about this at the group dinner with that?
00:39:29
Speaker 2: You know, like, what's the conversation?
00:39:31
Speaker 1: I love that you're talking about it, and I love that you're opening up about things that people don't want to talk about. That's like super taboo. People don't want to talk about finances. I'll talk about their relationships, but they do not want to talk about finances.
00:39:43
Speaker 2: And it's such a human thing.
00:39:46
Speaker 1: I mean, it is such a human thing. It's such a human shit. Well, you're so beautiful. I'm like love hotel yes, yes, yes, right, opening up your bed a man, yes, sharing about your worth space with a man, yes, I see a lot of Yeah, I'm gonna like yes, yes. Oh that's more fun and being you yes.
00:40:12
Speaker 2: Yeah. We have a lot of work to do.
00:40:13
Speaker 1: You and I after this call, Yeah, we've got I know, I've got deliverables. Now it's like, okay, yeah, do your work. Oh my god. It was so so, so great, great, great to have you. Thank you so The Valley Persian Style New episodes Thursday, nine pm on Bravo and Fridays on Peacock Giji. Thank you so much for the honest and truthful conversation. I love how unfiltered you are. Are you single and in your chapter two or do you have an I Do Part two story that you want to share? Call us or email us. All the info are in the show notes and make sure you rate and review the podcast I Do Part two and iHeartRadio podcast. We're falling in Love is the main objectives.
00:41:10
Speaker 3: M
Speaker 1: Hey I do Part two. It's your Celebrity Mentor, your favorite celebrity mentor Kelly ben Simon. And today I'm so excited to chat with a woman who, like all of us on this podcast, has gone through her own broken relationships and is a complete open book, which we love. She's an incredible single mom. She's stunning and you can see her sharing her life on the new Bravo show The Valley Persian Style. It's Golanessa aka Gigi because you're so unfiltered, which I love about you on The Valley Persian Style. You're doing such a great job and you are so gorgeous and so real, and I have so much fun watching you. All my friends are obsessed. Let's talk about marriage today.
00:01:07
Speaker 2: Oh your thought lay it on me.
00:01:11
Speaker 1: Just let's go right into it. What are your thoughts about marriage? Would you get married again?
00:01:17
Speaker 2: Okay?
00:01:17
Speaker 3: So I think the reason it's so easy for me to get married is because I.
00:01:22
Speaker 2: Don't believe in marriage.
00:01:24
Speaker 3: To me, it's not like a sanctity, it's not anything special.
00:01:29
Speaker 2: It's to me, it's ridiculous.
00:01:32
Speaker 3: It's the worst business contract I've ever read in my life. Is someone who loves to be in business. It doesn't make sense the contract of marriage. So I'm against it. So for me, it's fun to play around with it a little bit. I'm sorry. These dogs are just ridiculous. This is what I'm married to.
00:01:50
Speaker 2: This is marriage.
00:01:51
Speaker 1: Yes, you are married to love. I see that. But give me a little recap on your relationship history so that the listeners like kind of you know, get a sense of what we're talking about. Oh my gosh, they're so cute.
00:02:03
Speaker 3: Well, I just I think that for me, it's very hard to date. I'm a very independent woman. I use this ferm donor to have a child, you know. So for me, it's a clear indicator that I'm not looking for attachment from a man.
00:02:17
Speaker 2: I'm looking to fulfill my own needs.
00:02:19
Speaker 3: And I'm not saying a man doesn't fulfill that need. It's just I need it in doses, if that makes sense. So I really would appreciate a man who's busy, a businessman who's constantly on the go, and maybe a long distance kind of a relationship, you know, something that's not in your face the way Bob is always in my face like this, you see this, this is this.
00:02:41
Speaker 2: I just can't I just can't love. I thank you one minute. This is what I deal with.
00:02:47
Speaker 1: But look at which they love you. Look at much love you bring to these a beautiful animals. Look at that. That is amazing. You know it's interesting because you know, I mean, you have had a longer time on television, and so have I. But I also am looking for someone who's independent because I have a very big life, and you know, I wear a lot of hats and I do a lot of things. I travel a lot. So for me, being in someone who's independent is really really important. But it's also difficult because there's a push and pull that I want them to be independent and I also have my independence, but I also need I'm also a very loving person and look, I mean you are too obviously look at you how you are with these beautiful, beautiful dogs. So I think that's one thing that we have in common, is that we do want that kindness and attention and love, but we also need to know what we need to do. So how long, just for the listeners, how long have you been on television? How many years?
00:03:48
Speaker 2: Since twenty eleven? So fifteen years?
00:03:51
Speaker 1: Okay, so literally like almost like you know, half of your life.
00:03:56
Speaker 3: I would love for you to say half my life. I'm forty four, so I would love all for.
00:04:00
Speaker 2: You to say half my life.
00:04:01
Speaker 1: I mean, you're gorgeous and young andrge I mean I just think like I'll take you girl. Yes, okay, you don't look forty four. You're blessed with beauty. But doctor, let's just say and good doctor. But let's just let's just for the listeners to say, so half of your life because obviously when you were younger, you were young, but like your from your twenties to your thirties to your forties, you've been on TV. So how does that How do you feel? Has that been good for you? Has that been hard for you? Like? Lay that out?
00:04:31
Speaker 2: It's arollably above. I think you know as you know.
00:04:33
Speaker 3: It's it's it opens the door to a lot of opportunities, both positive opportunities and difficult opportunities. You are supposed to be as vulnerable as you can be and transparent as you can be, knowing that the whole world is going to attack every single one of those vulnerabilities.
00:04:52
Speaker 2: So it's kind of like a damned if you do, damned if you don't.
00:04:55
Speaker 3: It's it's I like to call it a mind because to me, that's the best way I see it. Yeah, but when you live in your truth, you know that judgment is going to happen, regardless of there being a camera and an audience or not. I've always lived my life a little bit differently than most people, which I guess makes me.
00:05:14
Speaker 2: Great for TV, you know, but it is exhausting. It's a lot.
00:05:18
Speaker 3: Now that I have a five year old son, it's a different tier of thought process and anxiety and worry.
00:05:27
Speaker 1: Do you think it's difficult to date because you have a son? Do you think it's difficult because you're on TV?
00:05:34
Speaker 2: I think being in LA is what makes it difficult.
00:05:36
Speaker 3: I think statistically, LA is probably one of the most difficult places to find.
00:05:41
Speaker 2: Any substance in a man here.
00:05:45
Speaker 3: I think people sort of migrate to LA with an ulterior motive of whether it's acting, modeling, TV, whatever it is. People don't just have a lot of culture in LA. The culture here is opportunity and everything, and everyone is a ladder. My guards are up because I'm on TV. I get nervous about that. Where does someone go? You know? I was asking Jeff Lewis because he's like, why are you saying I'm like, where does someone go in LA to meet someone?
00:06:12
Speaker 2: I would love to know.
00:06:13
Speaker 1: I really like what you just said about the latter, because that's not just in LA, by the way, that's everywhere. And when you are when you do put yourself out in a situation like we do, and you are authentic, You're much more authentic than I ever was. But I was on TV and like the Ice Age, and I just, you know, as you know, were watching some of the things you said yesterday and the things you're saying again today, like about your truth and knowing who you are and all those things are really really important. And I feel like a lot of people because you are so real that they're like I think, don't think that you actually are. You are and you are real. So are you dating?
00:06:49
Speaker 2: I'm not, I'm not. But again, I hate to keep writing.
00:06:51
Speaker 3: I feel like I've been mentioning Jeff Lewis's name constantly. He really sort of opened my eyes to it a little bit, saying, you know, I haven't been and dating. You know, my son's almost six years old, and I'm ready to sort of meet a partner. He's old enough to where like it's okay if my parents babysit, you know, if I need to go spend time with someone to get to.
00:07:12
Speaker 2: Know them, and so I don't know how.
00:07:14
Speaker 3: And I went out and I bought an iPad because I wanted to join Riah because apparently Riyah is exclusive to Apple and I have a Samsung phone, so I want to boyd and I'm on.
00:07:25
Speaker 2: The wait list. I could put you on because I didn't want them.
00:07:28
Speaker 3: Have my contact list. They're like, we need your contact list to get referrals. I'm like, I don't want to open my contact list. I didn't know what that meant.
00:07:35
Speaker 1: Right well, just so, just like Ria, in order to be on ride, you have to give them the contact list so they can see, like who you're friends with. That's part of their algorithm is connecting you with people that you know, which is good and bad.
00:07:49
Speaker 2: I don't want to date everyone I know. I've already in my phone.
00:07:52
Speaker 1: They'll say, like people that you have in common, so it's not just like random people that you would have no idea who they are, do you know what I mean. I'm happy to help you with that, so your DMS people slide into your DMS.
00:08:07
Speaker 3: I'm private on my DM stuff. I don't look at my dms.
00:08:12
Speaker 2: I can't. There's so many come through, and like.
00:08:15
Speaker 3: You said, that whole authenticity kind of factor that I have, I get a lot of backlash. So if I were to go through all the d ms, I would be setting myself up for a major depression.
00:08:27
Speaker 1: I know. I mean, I still get a lot of really really wild stuff on Instagram and on TikTok. But I I kept because you know, I'm single. So I'm like, okay, I have to you know, my applications are open. I have to see like who's who's interesting? And you know, you never know. Like I was on, I was on, I was on a pod and I was and I was like, hey, you know, maybe I'll just slid into Kevin Cosners.
00:08:55
Speaker 2: Oh okay, So I.
00:08:57
Speaker 1: Did like if like who's person? Like why is he coming into my ideas? But I was like, you know what, who cares? Like have I don't have anything to lose? H Okay, Let's talk about the Bravo universe. Are there any guys on you know, in the Bravo universe that you would be interested in talking to? Like shit or.
00:09:30
Speaker 3: Been there dead now with Chab like Shepp is like a great time to me. I think he's so so intelligent, and he really turns me on to.
00:09:40
Speaker 2: Intellect is a big thing for me. I'm very safe. You're sexual, so like Shep is a hottie.
00:09:45
Speaker 3: No, there was only one guy I think really, you know, hook up worthy and smart enough to be like turned on by it. He's not on Bravo anymore. But Mauricio Marisi is a very handsome man. And I mean it's because we're from l A. We all have the same friends. My best Jay is his boss.
00:10:06
Speaker 2: You know, his bosses's boss, so it's kind of he's he's a hotty.
00:10:12
Speaker 1: He is very attractive. He is very attractive. Okay, well so Whitney and I back in the day when on a couple of dead dates before he even started Southern Charm and during Bravocan, I met Captain Jason and he like hops into my GM. Damn my GM, my DM sometimes and I'm like.
00:10:32
Speaker 2: Oh, he's thet man in the whole. Oh he's one of my dear friends. I love him dearly.
00:10:39
Speaker 3: But he is I think, very similar to me, very flirty by nature, so it's really easy to think he's being flirtatious. He's just so open and so loving. So but he's he's the kindest.
00:10:54
Speaker 1: He is such and the way he talks about his daughter is just so beautiful, and I just think he's so great. Wait, let's get back to ritio, because I'm kind of like feeling the vibe now, dark hair, beautiful and I love that you're sacheo sexual because I am very much like that too. Like I I like fall in love. I've only fallen in loved once, but I fall into heavy attraction. When men are smart, it makes me like it just ignites me. I'm like a great agree.
00:11:24
Speaker 3: That's why for me, I think that dating apps never appealed to me.
00:11:29
Speaker 2: This is my first time of trying to join rias ever, because I can't look at a picture and judge.
00:11:34
Speaker 3: For me, as soon as someone's smart, they've become the hottest guy in the room, So just judging them by their face and criteria doesn't do it for me.
00:11:42
Speaker 1: You know, do you feel like the guys that you have been in relationship with in the past were smart?
00:11:47
Speaker 3: Oh gosh, No, No, I don't think I wanted to date my type.
00:11:52
Speaker 2: Yeah.
00:11:53
Speaker 3: No, I didn't want to date my type until recently. It's only been you know now that I'm a mom and I have my life together. Before I was the type of person every four months, I dumped the guy and I went and found a new one. As soon as they were getting to the point where I love you, I'm starting to, you know, have these strong feelings. It was, you know, I ran, I ran, and I was getting a high off of that mental stimulation, that rush that people get from the beginning of relationships. And I didn't realize I was chasing that, you know, and I was serving this internal ego of mine to kind of.
00:12:28
Speaker 2: Conquer, and that was very different.
00:12:32
Speaker 3: I think I think I looked a little bit more for vulnerable men at that point because I needed to have that feeling of conquering.
00:12:39
Speaker 2: Note now I.
00:12:40
Speaker 3: Know exactly what I need. I need to be stimulated mentally. I need to be have someone so humble and generous to put me in my place in the most beautiful way, if that makes sense, and it's hard to find.
00:12:54
Speaker 1: I just find it interesting that you said, because most there's like there, they talk about like chasing and attracting, and you're talking You're not talking about chasing and attracting men. You're talking about chasing and attracting that feeling, which I think is really interesting and very honest of you. I mean, I can understand that too. I mean I went through moments when I was just kind of I wasn't. I was just looking for that feeling I wanted because I was like working so much and raising my two kids on my own that when I was when I was around certain, you know, different kinds of men, I was always gravitating towards. I wouldn't say the bad guy, but the.
00:13:33
Speaker 2: Wrong guy, right, the wrong one, the temporary ones.
00:13:37
Speaker 1: Right, yes, the temporary and I I never I never really thought about that until just listening to you right now. It's a drugug, Yes, it's a total drug. It's total drug. What about younger men? Do you have any thoughts on that?
00:13:49
Speaker 2: No, it doesn't do it for me.
00:13:52
Speaker 3: I think I need an older gentleman that has already been married, has kids, and is not really longing for those goals and has different sets of goals in their minds with partnership and growth and their businesses and maybe establishing businesses. For me, that is my goal when I look at a relationship. So I would like for them to have experienced those things to know what it feels like to be married, to know what it feels like to have their own children, and then to be able to experience life together and a different perspective.
00:14:25
Speaker 1: It's interesting because yesterday I was kind of talking about like the things that I that I was looking for, and I used to always say, first, I always wanted to have more kids. That was my whole thing. That's the reason I got divorced, is because I want to have more kids for my kids, to have a family. And then I would say, I want to have this gorgeous family for my family, like I have the taglines I have like relationship taglines. And then yesterday I was like, wait, what am I doing. I'm setting myself up for these huge expectations of like trying to create this big family narrative of this culture, this gorgeousness. Like it's just too much. It's too much of an expectation for me. Why can't I just find someone or be with someone who is just interested in like being like, you know, a love partner in crime. That's really what I'm looking for. So it's just kind of like it's just fascinating talking, she said, because we're really kind of like on the same path. I mean, I'm older than you are, but we are in this same kind of like life path, and I think it's really really interesting love. What about Love Hotel? Would you ever go on Bravo's Love Hotel?
00:15:27
Speaker 3: You know, I've never been interested in wanting to do all these other types of shows before, but the Love Hotel definitely sparked my interest because that is up my alley. I'm not into the traders and the competition things.
00:15:39
Speaker 2: I don't have it in me to do that stuff.
00:15:42
Speaker 3: Yeah, but Love Hotel, I have it in me to meet a bunch of gorgeous men in a beautiful place.
00:15:48
Speaker 1: Of course, sign me up, Kelly wait, I need to manifest the two of us a love Hotel. The two of us were like each other's wing woman like, don't do this, my god, don't. Yes, then Maritzu, I'm like, there, there she is.
00:16:02
Speaker 3: We'll be fighting over the the Einstein in the room. We'll get test for the final decision.
00:16:08
Speaker 1: I feel like Gigi's not smart enough. He's not smart.
00:16:10
Speaker 2: You're not for you.
00:16:16
Speaker 1: Do you feel that? Okay, So we were talking before at the top about how your first marriage was seven weeks then you got divorced and your second marriage was ten days and then annulled. So sorry, I'm sorry, sorry about both of those. I mean really like that just like broke yesterday. When I was watching you talk about it, I could just see and I could hear the flutter in your voice. I'm like, literally, I'm like emotional about it right now. I like, I'm like, so, I'm so happy where you are today, but I'm so sad that you had to go through that. Do you feel like marriage has been too constricting to you? For you for you to you?
00:16:51
Speaker 3: Maybe both times I got married for different reasons, never for the fact of getting married to the person, which which sex. To say, I don't know if there's a world in which marriage would ever be something that's real for me, I don't know. I'm not going to say no. But with my first ex, I loved him very much. I still love him very We still talk all the time. You know, he lives in Florida. But we had the best relationship he and I. I really did love him, and I was worried that he was, you know, going to get deported and whatnot, and I was like willing to do what I had to do. At that time, I thought you know, I don't want to lose you, and so let's, you know, get married. He really wanted a wife the next day and it was not in my pingo cards. So it was just very tough and it turned into a very long.
00:17:46
Speaker 2: And bitter divorce process.
00:17:48
Speaker 3: But I kept the ring in the end, which he was like that was his excuse to fight for. But I know I was just he was hurt and I did hurt him. It was a little rough the way I did things.
00:18:01
Speaker 1: Wait, if you don't mind me asking, because I know that you're so honest, how did you do things? You just were like, I can't be your wife.
00:18:07
Speaker 2: I can't, yeah, very honest every day?
00:18:11
Speaker 1: Or what define wife? I want to know what your definition is of a wife in that scenario.
00:18:18
Speaker 3: Well, I don't want to live with the person, and if we live together, I do need to have like my own separate room, my own separate wing like you don't. When I travel with a boyfriend, I always want my own room.
00:18:28
Speaker 2: Like I can't. I just can't share my space. I'm very weird.
00:18:32
Speaker 3: It sucks because I have four animals and if they're not all on the bed with me, I can't sleep. But if a man is next to me.
00:18:39
Speaker 2: I'm like, so I do just want that space.
00:18:42
Speaker 3: And I think I'm just very brutally honest with my first ex SL. I remember one time because I was traveling a lot at that time, and I was filming the show and just doing so many things, and I said like, if I'm not around, you know, and you're out, you're with the boys.
00:18:59
Speaker 2: And the like a hot chick or something. I was like, I don't mind if you I was like, as long as no one sees.
00:19:05
Speaker 3: It, yeah, And he got so upset with me. He lost his because he assumed that that meant I wanted.
00:19:16
Speaker 2: To go do that in his mind.
00:19:18
Speaker 3: I was like, no, I'm just saying, like, guys have needs. I don't get jealous by stuff like that, so it's fine.
00:19:25
Speaker 2: He's like, what are you talking about?
00:19:28
Speaker 1: So are you interested in polyamory or I thought I was.
00:19:32
Speaker 3: I thought I was interested in the body relationship for a while, and I started exploring that route, and I think, just because I don't get jealous of things, I thought that that's what it was.
00:19:43
Speaker 2: But it's I don't think it's for me.
00:19:45
Speaker 3: I think I just need a man who understands that I need space sometimes I need a little bit of understanding that I'm I've been in my alpha for so long that I do want to bring it down. And I need someone who's so secure in his alpha that he's able to tap into his femininity to bring.
00:20:05
Speaker 2: That out of me. And I think when I'm not fighting anymore than I believe that, right.
00:20:12
Speaker 3: But it's true though, Like it's so hard to find a man who's so in his secure in his alpha that he can tap into his femininity.
00:20:19
Speaker 1: So are you a dismissive avoidant? Is that your attachment style?
00:20:22
Speaker 3: Or Patti Stanger hates me because she's like that cannot be your attachment style. I'm just I love space, I love I love I love language is words of affirmation. I need words of praise and gifts. It's a big one for me, and I know all the girls I love gifts. No, no, no, I need it. Yeah.
00:20:47
Speaker 2: I'm a Sagittarius.
00:20:48
Speaker 1: Oh you're a Sagittarius. I'm a Taurus. That's interesting. My son's a Taurus because usually sagittarius As are like more like active service and not necessarily gifts. But that's interesting. So do you think this? I mean, I'm not a therapist. I'm not trying to be I'm just curious because, like, your relationship with your dad seems just so seems so loving and kind, and he obviously was very nurturing towards you. Do you think it's because you had such an amazing father that you want this independence.
00:21:17
Speaker 2: Oh that's a great question.
00:21:19
Speaker 3: Yeah.
00:21:20
Speaker 2: I have two cats.
00:21:21
Speaker 3: I have one African Serbil and one regular cat. I don't know where they are. I'm getting a pig too. I've appried for a pig, so I'll have.
00:21:28
Speaker 2: A pig soon.
00:21:31
Speaker 3: I think having a really great dad makes it a little difficult to, you know, want to find a man.
00:21:37
Speaker 2: They always say girls marry their fathers. Right. He's definitely set the bar very high for me.
00:21:44
Speaker 3: He's always been very open and understanding of what I need and what makes me happy. And there was another pressure in my household to get married. When my sister was in our twenties and wanted to get married, my parents were trying to talk her out of it. You know, They're like, I don't know, Oh wait, you're young, like go travel the world.
00:22:00
Speaker 2: World.
00:22:00
Speaker 3: Yeah, it does make it a little hard to amount to that. But in the same breath, when you have something so great to look up to. Isn't that what we're supposed to strive towards, you know, the next best thing.
00:22:16
Speaker 1: What did your parents think about when you conceived Elijah from IVF and a sperm donor was your How did that? How did that land for your family?
00:22:25
Speaker 3: I knew that when I got to a certain age and my health was under control, because I have a very aggressive autoimmune disease and I've had it since I was twenty seven years old. So the types of medications and you know, infusions and injections that I have to be on, it's very scary.
00:22:45
Speaker 2: You can't be pregnant, you can't do all that.
00:22:47
Speaker 3: So once my health was really good, and I'm like, you know, I'm getting older, I'm, you know, thirty something years old.
00:22:57
Speaker 2: I need to get this process started. So I did.
00:23:00
Speaker 3: By the time, you know, I was thirty nine, I had my son. But that didn't go easily. My first round of IVF, I got pregnant and while I was filming a scene, I just started getting this extreme pain and an hour later, I'm in the o R getting you know, transferred over, getting my both my flopian tubes removed. I had an atopic usure, which doesn't happen during IVF because they bypassed the fallopian tubes to do IVF. So they think because of my autoimmune my philippion tubes were working as sections and probably just sucked the embryo in and so I lost both my Filippian tubes. The last thing I remember, I was a nurse about my head having me sign a form and I was like a little sedatea.
00:23:46
Speaker 2: I'm like, what are you talking about.
00:23:47
Speaker 3: She's like, the state requires you to sign that you were sterilizing yourself.
00:23:52
Speaker 2: And I just remember signing and then just going out.
00:23:56
Speaker 3: So three months later, I got pregnant with my son, Elijah.
00:23:59
Speaker 2: I I knew the goal was to have a child. I didn't care what was going to happen, and I knew I had to.
00:24:06
Speaker 3: But when I was about five months pregnant, my host got really bad and I had to begin medications that were safe during pregnancy, but we got to a point where I had to just induce early and he was born the first month of the COVID quarantine. So it was very weird time. And then you know, they saw my.
00:24:26
Speaker 2: Babies healthy, they kicked us out of the hospital. They're like get out of here, Get out of here. It's been great.
00:24:32
Speaker 3: I think COVID was a blessing to be at home and raise a child and just focus only on the kid.
00:24:38
Speaker 2: And I did that. So now here we are.
00:24:40
Speaker 3: He'll be six in April, and it's a whole different world.
00:24:45
Speaker 1: I mean, I cannot believe that you've been through. I just have to go back for one second. I mean, just being out of it and signing a document that says for a female to say that you're not able to have a child is or that you're not anymore. I can't even. I can't even outside of filming, and I can't even.
00:25:08
Speaker 2: I don't even.
00:25:09
Speaker 1: I don't even know what to say.
00:25:10
Speaker 3: I mean, I think every single woman who has experienced trying to have children or having children has experienced something traumatic or difficult, whether it's with the pregnancy, after the pregnancy, are raising your child. I'm not, you know, unique to anything. I That's why I humble myself very quickly and I say, I'm okay, I'm able to still get pregnant just through IVF.
00:25:37
Speaker 2: Why not I was already doing IVF to begin with.
00:25:39
Speaker 3: If I can do that, okay, Now I'm pretty much I hate to say this, but I'm a dumpster.
00:25:45
Speaker 2: You could just to me and I can't get pregnant anymore.
00:25:48
Speaker 1: Stop. I don't say thanks, you're not that you're not that well. But you know, way before I was in Housewives, I my children in my early thirties. Like you you were late theres, but I was in my early thirties and my old my youngest daughter, I thought that she was going to have some serious issues and I was very, very very concerned. And I always treated my body like a vessel for the girls, and I just was so concerned that my youngest daughter that was going to be that there was going to be an issue. And you know, like you just said, like you know, there's so many women that have been through these different experiences by raising, you know, having children, trying to have children, trying to get you know, get pregnant, raise children, raising children on their own. Just so there's you know, just it's the it's just there's a lot that's hard. What about I know that the IVF was was obviously so difficult, would you have her have any children or I mean obviously your health is it, you know, as an issue, but would you ever have any more children.
00:27:05
Speaker 3: I don't think I do want to have another child. I think I'm good where I'm at right now. My health is my main concern. I know, having an autoimmune disease is going to be a lifelong battle.
00:27:18
Speaker 2: It doesn't get cured, it doesn't go a wait. I actually just got back.
00:27:20
Speaker 3: From Columbia a couple of days ago, doing stuff cell treatment over there and some heeaning, you know, ceremonies and whatnot, to.
00:27:29
Speaker 2: Anything I can to make.
00:27:30
Speaker 3: My body better and stronger for my son. I think I chose a very unconventional route to have a child to begin with, so I want to focus as much as I can on making sure I create a really good, you know, hospital environment for him. Emotionally, he for the first time, you know, said to me, I wish I had a daddy, and it, I mean, it was a gut punch, and I wanted to immediately walk out of his and just walk away and pretend I didn't hear it. But I took a deep breath and I just sat down and I said, you wish you had a daddy? And he goes, yeah, And I said, well, what would you do if you had a daddy? What would you guys do together. And he started thinking about it, and he goes, I don't know, And I said, do you think any of those things that you might want to do with a daddy that I can do with you, or that pop up my dad.
00:28:25
Speaker 2: Can do with you?
00:28:27
Speaker 3: And he started thinking about it and then he just started watching TV and he changed the subject.
00:28:32
Speaker 2: But it was like it was one of those things.
00:28:35
Speaker 3: And I know that throughout his life, at different stages and ages, it's going to come in a different direction, in a different way. So I'm just trying to do everything I can to make sure he knows he's so loved by whoever he does have in his life, you know.
00:28:52
Speaker 2: But I don't wantays say, listen, some kids have two.
00:28:55
Speaker 3: Dads, some kids have two moms. And you know, one of his friends back in preschool a couple of years ago, the mother had died unfortunately of cancer, very young, and you know.
00:29:05
Speaker 2: So he was friends with the son. I said, you know, he doesn't have a mom right now.
00:29:10
Speaker 3: And so I try, but you know, what are you going to say to a five and a half year old which every movie you watch, every.
00:29:16
Speaker 2: Cartoon is Mommy and Daddy.
00:29:19
Speaker 3: You know, how do I explain that I don't know how you know, so every age and stage is different. But I'm really proud of so many women out there, and I see more and more women out there every day taking this upon themselves, the wanting a child so badly and knowing that they're going to give it. They're all and it's the best we can do is give it our all. That's all we could do.
00:29:41
Speaker 1: I mean, yes, yes, I'm just like so moved by you. I mean, you're just an incredible human. Oh my, I love you. So what advice would you give to other single moms that are listening right now?
00:29:56
Speaker 2: I don't know.
00:29:57
Speaker 3: I don't have any advice from I would take all the advice in the world. I'm humbul enough to know that I know.
00:30:03
Speaker 2: Nothing and I'm learning every day.
00:30:05
Speaker 3: And I'm one of those moms that loves the criticism. If you think I'm doing something wrong or if you like what I'm doing, I want to.
00:30:12
Speaker 2: Know about it. That's how I grow.
00:30:14
Speaker 3: So I think to moms, just be open all to hearing and accepting. You know, there are people's opinions, especially your children.
00:30:24
Speaker 2: I think it's really.
00:30:25
Speaker 3: Important that we listen to them and not want to assume you know what they're thinking and feeling and saying because I remember being a child and knowing that my parents were my heroes. So whatever they felt and said was godly to me. You know, So listen, listen to your kids.
00:30:44
Speaker 2: That's all I know.
00:30:46
Speaker 1: I mean, I love that because I feel the same way about my parents. They are they were my heroes, they still are my heroes. I think. One thing that's interesting is that going through this world being on television, like the microscope that you were talking about before, for is that there are so many women because we reach so many different women who have gone through a lot of different situations. And one thing that I've learned from just being on TV is that I and I continue to say this, like I love their criticism because I am like you, I want to be better. I don't want to just be like look at me, I'm a long grade right to do that, that's awful. I do want to grow and I do want to be better, and I think you know, you know, one thing I wanted to ask you about is that you know, because you did downe on this on your own, like who are your village? Because like for me, my village, my parents, my twin brother, my sister, my close friends, my Bravo community. That was my village. So who's your village?
00:31:45
Speaker 2: My parents are my village.
00:31:47
Speaker 3: My dad, especially my mom is in the you know, beginning middle phases of dimension and Alzheimer's, so it's a little trickier now, but I love that my son gets to spend time with her. But he and my dad, I think my dad internally feels this extra obligation to be that male role model in his life. My dad said one time he took my son to the park and the kid asked, my son, where's your dad? And he said, I don't have a dad, but I have a grandpa, and he pointed over.
00:32:21
Speaker 2: My dad said his heart just melted.
00:32:24
Speaker 3: And so I love hearing that because my dad's such a great male role model to look up to. So I'm just so blessed to have those two and I have a really good group of friends.
00:32:34
Speaker 2: Now they have their kids.
00:32:36
Speaker 3: Mjay, you know, her son is one year older than my son. And on the show you see my friend Natasha, she has three kids.
00:32:44
Speaker 2: So we're very close.
00:32:46
Speaker 3: I really like establishing his friendship bonds, you know, with people, And that's my village. You know, that's our animals. Our animals are very much a big part of our family. We treat them better than family sometimes. So you know, for Eli, he really when he he will say he misses his animals before he says he misses me, that's for sure. Anytime he goes to my parents' house, he goes, I want to go hug my animals.
00:33:15
Speaker 2: What about me? He's like, Okay.
00:33:18
Speaker 1: One thing that's interesting is that, like you love your son so much, and you love your family, and you love your animals so much, but the men don't. They don't have a space.
00:33:30
Speaker 3: That's like my whole storyline so far had been the fact that I had to downsize my house. And I had a six bedroom house when we were filming, and it was very big.
00:33:39
Speaker 2: I get it, it's just my son and I. But now I downsize to a five bedroom, it's it's still rather big.
00:33:46
Speaker 3: We have a Our backyard is much much bigger now, which is great, and it's you know, perfect space for a piggy And I've been wanting a pig for a couple of years. So I applied and I got approved. So the next step is bigger that.
00:34:00
Speaker 1: Out, you know, So we're I wanted. I want to get into the show because this is the Valley Persian Style is such a great show, and I want to hear everything that's coming up. But I did love when you said, you know, I want you have to buy a first class ticket to know what that feels. I'm getting chills because I love that when you said that. And the reason that I love that is because it's so important to believe that you belong in these places. There's I mean there's there's I just feel that there's a lot of people that say I'm not worthy, I'm not this, I'm this, and I'm not giving, like they're defining themselves like crazy. But you're saying, if you've been there once.
00:34:46
Speaker 2: You long and again once you get a taste.
00:34:49
Speaker 1: And that and I love that. I was just like, that is so great. That is so great.
00:34:53
Speaker 2: I love when I heard Steve Harvey say it, it makes so much sense.
00:34:57
Speaker 3: I was like, well, that's a smart man. I mean, it makes sense. There's a lot of people who can't afford it, but everyone can save enough money one year.
00:35:05
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, metaphor, it's not about the first class ticket. It's about a moment or something that's to you that you would like to do that you've always thought about doing and whatever?
00:35:15
Speaker 2: That right that?
00:35:16
Speaker 1: So can you give us some tea? What is going to happen on the show? You guys are like, oh my god, opposite bedrooms, Like what's going on in the marriages? Like friends are more more bonded than the husbands of the line, Like what is going on?
00:35:32
Speaker 2: It's wild.
00:35:33
Speaker 3: We are in Palm Springs right now in the episodes, and oh my gosh, complete havoc broke loose in Palm Springs and I'll just tell you this. Somebody ended up jumping into an uber from Palm Springs at midnight and going back home to La by theirselves.
00:35:53
Speaker 2: So it was a lot went down.
00:35:57
Speaker 3: It's it's one of those like grab the popcorn, grab your seat else, because it's kind of it's one of those moments between remember you and Bethany that whole showdown, and oh my god, this is that. This is that you guys painted the road we're following in your footsteps.
00:36:14
Speaker 2: This is that moment.
00:36:18
Speaker 1: Like you're mean to me.
00:36:19
Speaker 2: I'm up here, you mean, you're right, I'm like.
00:36:23
Speaker 1: What is happening? Who is this person? How about? I mean, I'm jumping all over the place, but just from just going talking about the show, Reza and his husband, their relationship, I mean, talk about an iconic relationship. What can I do for you? If a man said what can I do for you? I'd be like what No one nobody has ever said what what they can do for me? They're always like what can you do for me?
00:36:49
Speaker 2: Right?
00:36:50
Speaker 3: No, I think they've really set the tone for a lot of couples and this doesn't come easily. Those two have put a lot of work into their marriage.
00:36:59
Speaker 2: They have been do you know, therapy together separately. They have really really put in the work.
00:37:05
Speaker 3: So it's really beautiful when you get to see those moments, the results of putting in the work and what it looks like, you know, being receptive to your significant other.
00:37:15
Speaker 2: It's really nice. Listen.
00:37:16
Speaker 3: I'm not saying they don't still get into it like regular couples. One hundred percent communication. When you learn how to hear your partner, it's a life changer.
00:37:27
Speaker 1: That seems to be a big theme this summer. This summer this season too, is about communication, just with with relationships. One thing I really liked was like the handholding of like, what what can I do and what you the rest of prosity. We were talking before about love language. I think that people say with their love languages, but then they don't this. This is a moment where it's like I need physical touch. I need more physical touch. I mean it's just so funny, so funny, He's like, touch my body.
00:37:56
Speaker 2: Yeah.
00:37:58
Speaker 1: But I just think that that's like the communication is something that I saw was like really really really like this common theme with everyone, and the good thing that I love about you is that you are such a great communicator. When people are talking about your home and all the situations that are going on with your life, you are like, what are you saying? Why are you saying it? Not because you're like confronting them, but you're like, tell me what's going on, because you're like, I want to be better, Like what can I do to be better?
00:38:28
Speaker 3: Yeah?
00:38:28
Speaker 2: I sadly know how I could fix things, Like let me know the better part. Yeah, I'm okay exactly.
00:38:33
Speaker 1: I just want to fix things.
00:38:34
Speaker 3: I feel like with most of America having experienced bad credit at some point in their lives, it just felt like I was being penalized for having bad credit, and I thought it was just a very human thing.
00:38:46
Speaker 2: I've messed up here and there, I've got bad credit.
00:38:49
Speaker 1: But the interesting thing when people don't understand a bad credit is that you're still working and you're still making money. It's not like you're not working. It's not like you're not writing and not making money. But just bad credit. I mean, yes, it's it happens all the time.
00:39:03
Speaker 2: It does. And that's the interesting thing.
00:39:06
Speaker 3: Like you just said, having money and having bad credit are two separate, completely separate things. I missed some payments, I you know, messed up on a couple of things, and I'm that's okay. I'm not ashamed of that. I don't think anyone should be shamed for that.
00:39:22
Speaker 2: So yeah, I wasn't affected by have a bad credit.
00:39:25
Speaker 3: I was just affected on why is everyone talking about this at the group dinner with that?
00:39:29
Speaker 2: You know, like, what's the conversation?
00:39:31
Speaker 1: I love that you're talking about it, and I love that you're opening up about things that people don't want to talk about. That's like super taboo. People don't want to talk about finances. I'll talk about their relationships, but they do not want to talk about finances.
00:39:43
Speaker 2: And it's such a human thing.
00:39:46
Speaker 1: I mean, it is such a human thing. It's such a human shit. Well, you're so beautiful. I'm like love hotel yes, yes, yes, right, opening up your bed a man, yes, sharing about your worth space with a man, yes, I see a lot of Yeah, I'm gonna like yes, yes. Oh that's more fun and being you yes.
00:40:12
Speaker 2: Yeah. We have a lot of work to do.
00:40:13
Speaker 1: You and I after this call, Yeah, we've got I know, I've got deliverables. Now it's like, okay, yeah, do your work. Oh my god. It was so so, so great, great, great to have you. Thank you so The Valley Persian Style New episodes Thursday, nine pm on Bravo and Fridays on Peacock Giji. Thank you so much for the honest and truthful conversation. I love how unfiltered you are. Are you single and in your chapter two or do you have an I Do Part two story that you want to share? Call us or email us. All the info are in the show notes and make sure you rate and review the podcast I Do Part two and iHeartRadio podcast. We're falling in Love is the main objectives.
00:41:10
Speaker 3: M