May 25, 2026
Married At First Sight UK Off Air After Rape Allegations
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RSS Feed A BBC documentary has rocked the dating reality show world. Two women have come forward alleging their on screen husbands raped them during the reality series, Married At First Sight. A third woman from season 8 claims she suffered from sexual misconduct from her on screen husband. The British broadcaster who carries the series has pulled every episode and paused all social media accounts while conducting an external review of the allegations.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
00:00:02
Speaker 1: Hey, folks, it is Monday, May twenty fifth, and a hit a hit dating reality show has been completely pulled off the air after allegations from two women who says they were raped by the person they were matched with on screen. With that, welcome to this episode of Amy and TJ. We should start rolls with what the show we're talking about, because it certainly jumped out at us Married at First Sight.
00:00:28
Speaker 2: Yes, this is married at First Site UK, So this is the British version and it is completely separate from the version here in the United States. In fact, a lot of things about the show are different. But on the married It first site rape show at sorry, the married It first Site show at the UK.
00:00:47
Speaker 1: Well, we're getting to the rape. But yes, that's the TI tongue to us to there love.
00:00:50
Speaker 2: That I just said that. But yes, two women told the BBC this was a documentary that they recently aired, that they were raped by their on screen husbands. Now, in the UK version, they don't legally get married. In the US version they are legally married. There is a distinction, but these are their on screen husbands, that's how they're described. And then a third woman has accused her on screen husband of sexual misconduct. Now, none of the women reported these incidents to police. We should point that out. But because of these allegations, now the broadcaster that has these shows, and there are ten seasons of these shows, they have pulled every single episode, every single season of the show off the air. They've paused all their social media accounts, they've issued an apology, and they've announced an external review that is taking place.
00:01:44
Speaker 1: An external is very important. We'll get into for uh in just a second. Rote, So let's go back how many seasons in the UK version?
00:01:52
Speaker 2: There are ten seasons seasons okay that have aired.
00:01:55
Speaker 1: So even though robes we say they are tied in title and licensing, if you will, but they're not produced. They're produced by two totally separate entities. Yes, they share a name, and they share namesake, and they share that same idea, but that needs to be made clear. This is not the same production company.
00:02:16
Speaker 2: Correct, So yes, there are no allegations in the United States. And look, this is an operation of franchise if you will, that began in the Netherlands. It's now a version of this show Married at First site is in thirty five countries around the world.
00:02:31
Speaker 1: So this could have a potential to put a stain on the entire system and the entire all these shows. But Roges it does this time around. You and I watch a lot of these shows, and we have these questions all the time. I said, how long before somebody gets paired or match with somebody who turns out to be some kind of a monster, and then what kind of recourse do they have against the show? I always wondered about this stuff.
00:02:53
Speaker 2: And you know what's interesting because they've obviously been talking to a lot of reality show contestants now about what the oversight is and how they vet for folks. And someone who was on Love Island made this really interesting comment. They said they had constant supervision. There are cameras on Love Island twenty four to seven documenting everything and everyone, but there is much less oversight on marrit at first sight. Because contestants live together in private apartments without continual monitoring. They have to have that to see if their relationships can work, so there isn't as much oversight, which potentially leads to a situation where there could be issues that have arisen, just like this one.
00:03:35
Speaker 1: And Robes I the part about that one. You have two people thrown. They literally just met this afternoon and are expected to go into a honeymoon suite together that night. They are robes. That sounds pretty terrifying.
00:03:51
Speaker 2: You pointed out. They are actively encouraged to be emotionally and physically sexually involved with these folks, and that's part of the social experiment. They are encouraged to have sex. They are encouraged to form these very intense emotional bonds very quickly, outside the norms of almost any other relationship.
00:04:14
Speaker 1: Everybody was talking to here knows the premise of the show. We keep moving on, like folks, understand They for the most part, Yes, you got these experts out there who go through apparently robes, pretty extensive work and looking at people's backgrounds, and they match people up. And then those people have agreed to step to the Altar cite unseen and marry a perfect stranger. They don't even know each other's first names when they get up there, and that is the experiment. And what do they give six weeks, I think, to live together and try to make it work. If at the end of that six weeks it doesn't work, they have this ceremony where they say, do you want to stay married or do you want to get a divorce. So as far as these in the US are legal in binding, they are.
00:04:54
Speaker 2: They actually have to go through a divorce or an annulment process and it's legal. So yes, you a divorce on your record if you go on the show in the United States.
00:05:04
Speaker 1: So that's the premise and robes. That's pretty terrifying. I don't know what kind of legal disclaimer you're and whatnot you would have to.
00:05:12
Speaker 2: They signed prenups here in the United States.
00:05:14
Speaker 1: I'm saying, to get for a show to be able to protect itself, you can't guarantee behind closed doors what kind of person somebody's going to turn into, and what if they end up assaulting somebody.
00:05:23
Speaker 2: Well, that's exactly what is said to have happened in the UK version against that right. So look, let's go over these women's allegations because they are distinctive and they We know that the third woman who just made an allegation of sexual misconduct, she gave her name and so we know she was on season eight. The other two women we don't know what seasons, We don't know anything because they're trying to protect their identities.
00:05:48
Speaker 1: I'm sorry to be clear, the two are that we don't know are the two rape victims.
00:05:51
Speaker 2: Yes, we don't know which season. We don't know because they're protecting their identities. But the first woman said that her on screen husband not only rape her, but threatened her with an acid attack. She said he had a massive temper when the cameras went off. Her quote was, he would just explode. He would go into this absolute focused anger. Now she had consensual sex with him plenty of times, she said, the sex started to turn violent and she had fingerprints from where he'd grabbed her and forced her. So the moment where one night where she claims that she didn't want to have sex and he forced her. The following morning, as soon as she left, she said, she messaged what they called the welfare team, and this is part of what they have in place for these types of shows, and she showed them her bruises and they took pictures of the bruises. But she didn't tell them at the time that it was a non consensual act. She just said he was rough with her, he was violent with her. So this is the first time the show says they are even hearing that she's claiming she's admitted that she did not tell them at the time it was non consentual.
00:06:56
Speaker 1: What's the suggestion about what should have taken place next? If she was making a complaint that it was vibe she told them as a head's up on Was anything done after that is?
00:07:08
Speaker 2: She says no? She says no. And then this second woman says she told show producers before the broadcast, before her season aired, before her episodes aired, that she was raped by her on screen husband. She said, first, the first thing that happened that she didn't want to happen is that while she was sleeping, he grabbed her breasts and grabbed her bomb. Okay. Eventually she says, they had consensual sex. Okay, this one's a little this one's a little tough. She said that on the occasion she's referring to, she wasn't in the mood. He said should we have sex? And she said, I don't want to. But he started having sex with her anyway, kind of just got on top of her, and he noticed that she wasn't into it, and he said, why you're not into it. She's like, I told you I didn't want to, and he was like, and they're already having sex at this point, having sex when they're having this conversation, and he said, well, you're making me feel like a rapist, and he's and then she said he stopped, but he still had sex with her, and she said later upon reflection, when she talked to a therapist, they told her that that was actually rape. So he's denying it. He said, this is completely consensual, and I stopped as soon as she said I as soon as I realized she wasn't into it. But her point is she told him no several times beforehand. So look, this is tough. There these are gray areas. No means no yes. But you're now on this show. You're told you're married, you're encouraged to have sex. You're not in the mood. If he insists anyway, is that rape? I mean this, and none of it went to the police, but this is this is I'm surprised, to be honest, this hasn't happened sooner.
00:08:48
Speaker 1: You know what, maybe these folks are going to start speaking up about this now or viewing their relationships differently that they had in the past when they somebody thought, you know what, I really didn't want to have sex, and this show pressured me to do so robes this stuff exactly.
00:09:05
Speaker 2: My wheel started turning, and I thought other contestants are going to hear this. Many of these marriages do end in divorce. Most of them end in divorce. You go back, you're angry, you're upset, you're embarrassed, you don't like what happened. You start reflecting about where the relationship went sour, and you start thinking things happen to you that shouldn't happen. I'm not saying thinking maybe they did happened to you that you didn't want to, that you didn't view in a different lens. Now you're hearing this report from the VBC.
00:09:30
Speaker 1: What always happens?
00:09:31
Speaker 2: Oh, that sounds like my story exactly exactly. And now this third woman, she has identified herself Shonah Manderson. She's from season eight. This was in twenty twenty three. She's accusing her on screen husband of subjecting her to what they're referring to as a non consensual sexual act. Bottom line is she wanted him to pull out and he didn't. That's what and so that is now being considered a sexual misconduct, an act of sexual misconduct, and she is upset, and she also contributed to this documentary.
00:10:04
Speaker 1: What that's I mean side that's not a situation up for interpretation, but it's an allegation having to do with the show, and it has to do with two strangers being put together who don't know each other well enough to know their likes and their dislikes and their moods and frankly how their sexual appetites. They don't know each other at all, So you're getting to know each other through sex.
00:10:29
Speaker 2: I mean, I don't know what they sign. I don't know if they agree to have sex with their partner. I don't know what the situation and if the rules will change about the show now based on this, because look, the British Broadcasting Company is doing an external review because they claim that any of these other cases that were brought up at the time were all reviewed internally. And when contestants are having to talk to show producers or members of the show's staff, even if it's their welfare team, they feel like they're encouraged to keep the show the production going. So there isn't this incentive to be honest or open or to have some out, some outside source that can they can make better recommendations.
00:11:07
Speaker 1: No, offense to those producers and the welfare folks, but they all work for the company. Correct all work because they need this show to be a hit. That is number one, not your emotions at the time, and that's just the truth and growths this is going. There will be a reckoning in reality shows because they are all built on conflict. They pump you full of alcohol on some of these shows. They put you in situations that are stressful as hell. They well, they bring up xes and have them come into They trying to get you to blow up on television.
00:11:41
Speaker 2: Absolutely, and we do it on a show like this, and that's when we start to get turned off because we like watching actual couples figure things out. And we've actually moved away from this show because it has gotten like that, and we have moved towards like ninety Day Fiance, where you've got people who actually are trying to be together and there are real relationship issues. No one's forcing two people to be together. These are people who want to be together. So it changed it for us. But look, they claim this is by the way, one of the biggest hits on British television. The audience gets to over three million, which is in these days a huge hit show, and they say, look, this is what the show said. They before casting, the carry out psychological checks, They have oversight by a trained welfare team, they have access to psychologists and ongoing support throughout the process. And we see that here in the US version as well. Are they up to eighteen nineteen seasons here in the US? This is a juggernaut of a show. And by the way, the British version had already filmed, cast, filmed their next season, so this would have been season eleven and it's expected at least it was expected to air later this year. Right now, they say no decision has been made on the broadcast of the upcoming season and any decision we take will be made only after this external review has concluded. So they're waiting to see if they can even put this new season on the air.
00:13:06
Speaker 1: They might literally be going through a process of every single person from day one and having an extensive interview about their experiences to try to figure out if this is I mean, this might be rampant throughout the seasons and they didn't even know it. Oh, so this is a mess.
00:13:24
Speaker 2: And to your point, when we come back, we're going to tell you about the larger implications of this big expose by the BBC, this documentary that really sent shockwaves through the reality show world. Maybe shock waves for those of us who consume reality shows, but for people who have been a participant in them, they say this was a long time coming. Welcome back everyone to this episode of Amy and TJ. We are talking talking about the rape allegations that have now surfaced in the British version of Married at First Site. It's Married at First Site UK, and three women have come forward. Two of them say they were raped by their on screen husbands. Another one said she suffered an act of sexual misconduct. And look, there are larger implications. First of all, the show's main sponsor, the lead sponsor in Britain in the UK, dropped them, said we're out. That's a big deal. And now the Broadcast Regulator, I guess the British's version of the FCC is now threatening to tighten rules for reality shows. So they're now looking into how they're going to better regulate these shows. And this is what the head of the British version of the FCC said. Sometimes we have these wake up calls where as a country, we just have to go. This has gone too far. We have to be careful, you don't switch everything off. But it is being done in a way that protects people, and so that is interesting. And one of the producers who was on mirriat at first site, it's interesting you were saying this earlier before the break. She said, we can absolutely produce these shows in a safe way if you replace welfare with genuine mental health experts and people who have a background to deal with these complex issues. But that would affect the content. We're not going to see the same type of show. If you want the current content, then no, I don't think they can be made safely in a way that protects everybody involved. Because conflict is what sells these shows.
00:15:31
Speaker 1: Gotta have it. You're not going to watch two people fall in love no, without conflict. And this conflict is not just getting into an argument a little spat. This is a lot of times ugly stuff robes and they put it in the teas going into commercial and they'll teach you about the fight that is going to happen on the next week's episode. It is intense stuff and I can imagine being thrown into that with a stranger being thrown that with a stranger in private, being thrown that with a stranger in private who's drinking. It's dangerous.
00:16:01
Speaker 2: I can't actually, now that you think about it, you can't believe it didn't happen before. And look, most of these folks when they're in these bubbles, so to speak, they don't have access to their phones, they don't have access to their friends, they don't have access to their family. They've lost all their support system and all their perspective. And so sometimes these women were even saying, you make choices that you wouldn't have made in the real world. But you're making it because you're feeling the pressure from the producers, the pressure to go along with whatever they want you to for the arc of the show, because it really needs the drama, it needs the ark, and so you're actively participating in it, and you don't have you don't have your people, you don't have your perspective, and so and you're young. A lot of these folks are young, and they're wanting to be stars, and they get themselves into situations they didn't necessarily realize what was happening.
00:16:58
Speaker 1: But a lot of times two robes they are stirring the pot and wanting to be that person that does stand out. How many times we see in those little confessionals, I am selling something and I am here to spice things. They announced to everybody, I'm going to be the problem and I'm not going to back down from anybody. That shit, it's what you have to do to stand out. Now, Robes, I don't know. I am wondering, Robes, if this is it. I know, if this is the thing where you start hearing now story after story after story and people putting their name on it about what's happened to them in these reality shows.
00:17:35
Speaker 2: I'm thinking about we and look, we loved Buried at First Sight for quite some time until it started getting a little it felt like it was getting manufactured.
00:17:45
Speaker 1: We should know. I think it was season sixteen and we quit because everybody behind the scene we didn't know about it, and the writers and the excuse me, the producer said they didn't. Everyone on the show was manipulating what was happening on cameras to make themselves look better, all right.
00:17:59
Speaker 2: And then we were like, why am I watching this? I'd rather watch a scripted series with talented actors. The whole point is to watch people struggle with ego and trying to find love, and that's an interesting, fascinating social experiment for sure. But if you think that they're just doing it for a payday for Instagram, to become an influencer and to get ads and paid programming, no, that's not what we want to watch the.
00:18:23
Speaker 1: Ros If that whole crew that season was able to fool us and fool the production staff, can't they easily fool you in your interview process? Can't they easily somebody sneak in there with bad intentions? Of course they can. So this is this story is why I'm keeping a close eye on this one road.
00:18:46
Speaker 2: But I am too because and you and I have seen, We have seen, and it seems like they're well intentioned. These psychologists who we love, and we've watched, we've.
00:18:55
Speaker 1: Interviewed Oh col' cal we love.
00:18:57
Speaker 2: And doctor Pepper and like, we love all the like and their advice is usually really solid fo yeah, applicable, and we like watching it for that reason. But we have watched them encourage folks to have sex. We have watched them encourage because that is a healthy part of our marriage. Of course it is. That's not bad advice, But do they really know what's going on behind the scenes? Do they really know what's going on when the cameras turn off? Do they really know how these people are treating one another when the cameras aren't rolling.
00:19:26
Speaker 1: Even the little things they're laying in bed next to each other. We don't know what happens in the middle of the night. If someone inappropriately puts a hand somewhere in the middle.
00:19:33
Speaker 2: Of these are strangers.
00:19:35
Speaker 1: He's a complete strangers who are now on TV together told to make a hit.
00:19:40
Speaker 2: Yeah, you and I both know after having had so much experience watching these shows, this absolutely is going to be a game changer. This BBC documentary has just changed the game. So we will continue to monitor this and anyone who loves these types of reality TV shows. Man, I bet you are reckoning is coming and we certainly will be following this glory and we always appreciate you listening to us. As always, I'm Amy Roebuck alongside T. J. Holmes. We'll talk to you soon.
Speaker 1: Hey, folks, it is Monday, May twenty fifth, and a hit a hit dating reality show has been completely pulled off the air after allegations from two women who says they were raped by the person they were matched with on screen. With that, welcome to this episode of Amy and TJ. We should start rolls with what the show we're talking about, because it certainly jumped out at us Married at First Sight.
00:00:28
Speaker 2: Yes, this is married at First Site UK, So this is the British version and it is completely separate from the version here in the United States. In fact, a lot of things about the show are different. But on the married It first site rape show at sorry, the married It first Site show at the UK.
00:00:47
Speaker 1: Well, we're getting to the rape. But yes, that's the TI tongue to us to there love.
00:00:50
Speaker 2: That I just said that. But yes, two women told the BBC this was a documentary that they recently aired, that they were raped by their on screen husbands. Now, in the UK version, they don't legally get married. In the US version they are legally married. There is a distinction, but these are their on screen husbands, that's how they're described. And then a third woman has accused her on screen husband of sexual misconduct. Now, none of the women reported these incidents to police. We should point that out. But because of these allegations, now the broadcaster that has these shows, and there are ten seasons of these shows, they have pulled every single episode, every single season of the show off the air. They've paused all their social media accounts, they've issued an apology, and they've announced an external review that is taking place.
00:01:44
Speaker 1: An external is very important. We'll get into for uh in just a second. Rote, So let's go back how many seasons in the UK version?
00:01:52
Speaker 2: There are ten seasons seasons okay that have aired.
00:01:55
Speaker 1: So even though robes we say they are tied in title and licensing, if you will, but they're not produced. They're produced by two totally separate entities. Yes, they share a name, and they share namesake, and they share that same idea, but that needs to be made clear. This is not the same production company.
00:02:16
Speaker 2: Correct, So yes, there are no allegations in the United States. And look, this is an operation of franchise if you will, that began in the Netherlands. It's now a version of this show Married at First site is in thirty five countries around the world.
00:02:31
Speaker 1: So this could have a potential to put a stain on the entire system and the entire all these shows. But Roges it does this time around. You and I watch a lot of these shows, and we have these questions all the time. I said, how long before somebody gets paired or match with somebody who turns out to be some kind of a monster, and then what kind of recourse do they have against the show? I always wondered about this stuff.
00:02:53
Speaker 2: And you know what's interesting because they've obviously been talking to a lot of reality show contestants now about what the oversight is and how they vet for folks. And someone who was on Love Island made this really interesting comment. They said they had constant supervision. There are cameras on Love Island twenty four to seven documenting everything and everyone, but there is much less oversight on marrit at first sight. Because contestants live together in private apartments without continual monitoring. They have to have that to see if their relationships can work, so there isn't as much oversight, which potentially leads to a situation where there could be issues that have arisen, just like this one.
00:03:35
Speaker 1: And Robes I the part about that one. You have two people thrown. They literally just met this afternoon and are expected to go into a honeymoon suite together that night. They are robes. That sounds pretty terrifying.
00:03:51
Speaker 2: You pointed out. They are actively encouraged to be emotionally and physically sexually involved with these folks, and that's part of the social experiment. They are encouraged to have sex. They are encouraged to form these very intense emotional bonds very quickly, outside the norms of almost any other relationship.
00:04:14
Speaker 1: Everybody was talking to here knows the premise of the show. We keep moving on, like folks, understand They for the most part, Yes, you got these experts out there who go through apparently robes, pretty extensive work and looking at people's backgrounds, and they match people up. And then those people have agreed to step to the Altar cite unseen and marry a perfect stranger. They don't even know each other's first names when they get up there, and that is the experiment. And what do they give six weeks, I think, to live together and try to make it work. If at the end of that six weeks it doesn't work, they have this ceremony where they say, do you want to stay married or do you want to get a divorce. So as far as these in the US are legal in binding, they are.
00:04:54
Speaker 2: They actually have to go through a divorce or an annulment process and it's legal. So yes, you a divorce on your record if you go on the show in the United States.
00:05:04
Speaker 1: So that's the premise and robes. That's pretty terrifying. I don't know what kind of legal disclaimer you're and whatnot you would have to.
00:05:12
Speaker 2: They signed prenups here in the United States.
00:05:14
Speaker 1: I'm saying, to get for a show to be able to protect itself, you can't guarantee behind closed doors what kind of person somebody's going to turn into, and what if they end up assaulting somebody.
00:05:23
Speaker 2: Well, that's exactly what is said to have happened in the UK version against that right. So look, let's go over these women's allegations because they are distinctive and they We know that the third woman who just made an allegation of sexual misconduct, she gave her name and so we know she was on season eight. The other two women we don't know what seasons, We don't know anything because they're trying to protect their identities.
00:05:48
Speaker 1: I'm sorry to be clear, the two are that we don't know are the two rape victims.
00:05:51
Speaker 2: Yes, we don't know which season. We don't know because they're protecting their identities. But the first woman said that her on screen husband not only rape her, but threatened her with an acid attack. She said he had a massive temper when the cameras went off. Her quote was, he would just explode. He would go into this absolute focused anger. Now she had consensual sex with him plenty of times, she said, the sex started to turn violent and she had fingerprints from where he'd grabbed her and forced her. So the moment where one night where she claims that she didn't want to have sex and he forced her. The following morning, as soon as she left, she said, she messaged what they called the welfare team, and this is part of what they have in place for these types of shows, and she showed them her bruises and they took pictures of the bruises. But she didn't tell them at the time that it was a non consensual act. She just said he was rough with her, he was violent with her. So this is the first time the show says they are even hearing that she's claiming she's admitted that she did not tell them at the time it was non consentual.
00:06:56
Speaker 1: What's the suggestion about what should have taken place next? If she was making a complaint that it was vibe she told them as a head's up on Was anything done after that is?
00:07:08
Speaker 2: She says no? She says no. And then this second woman says she told show producers before the broadcast, before her season aired, before her episodes aired, that she was raped by her on screen husband. She said, first, the first thing that happened that she didn't want to happen is that while she was sleeping, he grabbed her breasts and grabbed her bomb. Okay. Eventually she says, they had consensual sex. Okay, this one's a little this one's a little tough. She said that on the occasion she's referring to, she wasn't in the mood. He said should we have sex? And she said, I don't want to. But he started having sex with her anyway, kind of just got on top of her, and he noticed that she wasn't into it, and he said, why you're not into it. She's like, I told you I didn't want to, and he was like, and they're already having sex at this point, having sex when they're having this conversation, and he said, well, you're making me feel like a rapist, and he's and then she said he stopped, but he still had sex with her, and she said later upon reflection, when she talked to a therapist, they told her that that was actually rape. So he's denying it. He said, this is completely consensual, and I stopped as soon as she said I as soon as I realized she wasn't into it. But her point is she told him no several times beforehand. So look, this is tough. There these are gray areas. No means no yes. But you're now on this show. You're told you're married, you're encouraged to have sex. You're not in the mood. If he insists anyway, is that rape? I mean this, and none of it went to the police, but this is this is I'm surprised, to be honest, this hasn't happened sooner.
00:08:48
Speaker 1: You know what, maybe these folks are going to start speaking up about this now or viewing their relationships differently that they had in the past when they somebody thought, you know what, I really didn't want to have sex, and this show pressured me to do so robes this stuff exactly.
00:09:05
Speaker 2: My wheel started turning, and I thought other contestants are going to hear this. Many of these marriages do end in divorce. Most of them end in divorce. You go back, you're angry, you're upset, you're embarrassed, you don't like what happened. You start reflecting about where the relationship went sour, and you start thinking things happen to you that shouldn't happen. I'm not saying thinking maybe they did happened to you that you didn't want to, that you didn't view in a different lens. Now you're hearing this report from the VBC.
00:09:30
Speaker 1: What always happens?
00:09:31
Speaker 2: Oh, that sounds like my story exactly exactly. And now this third woman, she has identified herself Shonah Manderson. She's from season eight. This was in twenty twenty three. She's accusing her on screen husband of subjecting her to what they're referring to as a non consensual sexual act. Bottom line is she wanted him to pull out and he didn't. That's what and so that is now being considered a sexual misconduct, an act of sexual misconduct, and she is upset, and she also contributed to this documentary.
00:10:04
Speaker 1: What that's I mean side that's not a situation up for interpretation, but it's an allegation having to do with the show, and it has to do with two strangers being put together who don't know each other well enough to know their likes and their dislikes and their moods and frankly how their sexual appetites. They don't know each other at all, So you're getting to know each other through sex.
00:10:29
Speaker 2: I mean, I don't know what they sign. I don't know if they agree to have sex with their partner. I don't know what the situation and if the rules will change about the show now based on this, because look, the British Broadcasting Company is doing an external review because they claim that any of these other cases that were brought up at the time were all reviewed internally. And when contestants are having to talk to show producers or members of the show's staff, even if it's their welfare team, they feel like they're encouraged to keep the show the production going. So there isn't this incentive to be honest or open or to have some out, some outside source that can they can make better recommendations.
00:11:07
Speaker 1: No, offense to those producers and the welfare folks, but they all work for the company. Correct all work because they need this show to be a hit. That is number one, not your emotions at the time, and that's just the truth and growths this is going. There will be a reckoning in reality shows because they are all built on conflict. They pump you full of alcohol on some of these shows. They put you in situations that are stressful as hell. They well, they bring up xes and have them come into They trying to get you to blow up on television.
00:11:41
Speaker 2: Absolutely, and we do it on a show like this, and that's when we start to get turned off because we like watching actual couples figure things out. And we've actually moved away from this show because it has gotten like that, and we have moved towards like ninety Day Fiance, where you've got people who actually are trying to be together and there are real relationship issues. No one's forcing two people to be together. These are people who want to be together. So it changed it for us. But look, they claim this is by the way, one of the biggest hits on British television. The audience gets to over three million, which is in these days a huge hit show, and they say, look, this is what the show said. They before casting, the carry out psychological checks, They have oversight by a trained welfare team, they have access to psychologists and ongoing support throughout the process. And we see that here in the US version as well. Are they up to eighteen nineteen seasons here in the US? This is a juggernaut of a show. And by the way, the British version had already filmed, cast, filmed their next season, so this would have been season eleven and it's expected at least it was expected to air later this year. Right now, they say no decision has been made on the broadcast of the upcoming season and any decision we take will be made only after this external review has concluded. So they're waiting to see if they can even put this new season on the air.
00:13:06
Speaker 1: They might literally be going through a process of every single person from day one and having an extensive interview about their experiences to try to figure out if this is I mean, this might be rampant throughout the seasons and they didn't even know it. Oh, so this is a mess.
00:13:24
Speaker 2: And to your point, when we come back, we're going to tell you about the larger implications of this big expose by the BBC, this documentary that really sent shockwaves through the reality show world. Maybe shock waves for those of us who consume reality shows, but for people who have been a participant in them, they say this was a long time coming. Welcome back everyone to this episode of Amy and TJ. We are talking talking about the rape allegations that have now surfaced in the British version of Married at First Site. It's Married at First Site UK, and three women have come forward. Two of them say they were raped by their on screen husbands. Another one said she suffered an act of sexual misconduct. And look, there are larger implications. First of all, the show's main sponsor, the lead sponsor in Britain in the UK, dropped them, said we're out. That's a big deal. And now the Broadcast Regulator, I guess the British's version of the FCC is now threatening to tighten rules for reality shows. So they're now looking into how they're going to better regulate these shows. And this is what the head of the British version of the FCC said. Sometimes we have these wake up calls where as a country, we just have to go. This has gone too far. We have to be careful, you don't switch everything off. But it is being done in a way that protects people, and so that is interesting. And one of the producers who was on mirriat at first site, it's interesting you were saying this earlier before the break. She said, we can absolutely produce these shows in a safe way if you replace welfare with genuine mental health experts and people who have a background to deal with these complex issues. But that would affect the content. We're not going to see the same type of show. If you want the current content, then no, I don't think they can be made safely in a way that protects everybody involved. Because conflict is what sells these shows.
00:15:31
Speaker 1: Gotta have it. You're not going to watch two people fall in love no, without conflict. And this conflict is not just getting into an argument a little spat. This is a lot of times ugly stuff robes and they put it in the teas going into commercial and they'll teach you about the fight that is going to happen on the next week's episode. It is intense stuff and I can imagine being thrown into that with a stranger being thrown that with a stranger in private, being thrown that with a stranger in private who's drinking. It's dangerous.
00:16:01
Speaker 2: I can't actually, now that you think about it, you can't believe it didn't happen before. And look, most of these folks when they're in these bubbles, so to speak, they don't have access to their phones, they don't have access to their friends, they don't have access to their family. They've lost all their support system and all their perspective. And so sometimes these women were even saying, you make choices that you wouldn't have made in the real world. But you're making it because you're feeling the pressure from the producers, the pressure to go along with whatever they want you to for the arc of the show, because it really needs the drama, it needs the ark, and so you're actively participating in it, and you don't have you don't have your people, you don't have your perspective, and so and you're young. A lot of these folks are young, and they're wanting to be stars, and they get themselves into situations they didn't necessarily realize what was happening.
00:16:58
Speaker 1: But a lot of times two robes they are stirring the pot and wanting to be that person that does stand out. How many times we see in those little confessionals, I am selling something and I am here to spice things. They announced to everybody, I'm going to be the problem and I'm not going to back down from anybody. That shit, it's what you have to do to stand out. Now, Robes, I don't know. I am wondering, Robes, if this is it. I know, if this is the thing where you start hearing now story after story after story and people putting their name on it about what's happened to them in these reality shows.
00:17:35
Speaker 2: I'm thinking about we and look, we loved Buried at First Sight for quite some time until it started getting a little it felt like it was getting manufactured.
00:17:45
Speaker 1: We should know. I think it was season sixteen and we quit because everybody behind the scene we didn't know about it, and the writers and the excuse me, the producer said they didn't. Everyone on the show was manipulating what was happening on cameras to make themselves look better, all right.
00:17:59
Speaker 2: And then we were like, why am I watching this? I'd rather watch a scripted series with talented actors. The whole point is to watch people struggle with ego and trying to find love, and that's an interesting, fascinating social experiment for sure. But if you think that they're just doing it for a payday for Instagram, to become an influencer and to get ads and paid programming, no, that's not what we want to watch the.
00:18:23
Speaker 1: Ros If that whole crew that season was able to fool us and fool the production staff, can't they easily fool you in your interview process? Can't they easily somebody sneak in there with bad intentions? Of course they can. So this is this story is why I'm keeping a close eye on this one road.
00:18:46
Speaker 2: But I am too because and you and I have seen, We have seen, and it seems like they're well intentioned. These psychologists who we love, and we've watched, we've.
00:18:55
Speaker 1: Interviewed Oh col' cal we love.
00:18:57
Speaker 2: And doctor Pepper and like, we love all the like and their advice is usually really solid fo yeah, applicable, and we like watching it for that reason. But we have watched them encourage folks to have sex. We have watched them encourage because that is a healthy part of our marriage. Of course it is. That's not bad advice, But do they really know what's going on behind the scenes? Do they really know what's going on when the cameras turn off? Do they really know how these people are treating one another when the cameras aren't rolling.
00:19:26
Speaker 1: Even the little things they're laying in bed next to each other. We don't know what happens in the middle of the night. If someone inappropriately puts a hand somewhere in the middle.
00:19:33
Speaker 2: Of these are strangers.
00:19:35
Speaker 1: He's a complete strangers who are now on TV together told to make a hit.
00:19:40
Speaker 2: Yeah, you and I both know after having had so much experience watching these shows, this absolutely is going to be a game changer. This BBC documentary has just changed the game. So we will continue to monitor this and anyone who loves these types of reality TV shows. Man, I bet you are reckoning is coming and we certainly will be following this glory and we always appreciate you listening to us. As always, I'm Amy Roebuck alongside T. J. Holmes. We'll talk to you soon.