It’s Hot Divorcée Summer!

00:00:15
Speaker 1: Hey, I do Part two.

00:00:16
Speaker 2: It's your celebrity mentor Deanna Pappas and I'm joined today by my favorite real life single gal, Luise Hi. We have to jump right in because we have got to talk about the hottest trend this summer.

00:00:31
Speaker 3: Listen to this forget Brat's summer. That's so twenty twenty four. The wedding bands are coming off, and hot divorce Summer is heating up. Hot Divorce Summer has moved from social feeds to storefronts. High profile divorce attorney Laura Wasser joined forces with Reformation to launch the divorce collection, River Island released a guide for the trend, Twisted Tea launched a new breakup themed split pack, and even Netflix now has a Hot Divorce Summer section with movies and shows that fit the part. The new trend might help some realize happily ever After has less to do with finding Prince Charming and more to do with finding yourself.

00:01:08
Speaker 2: I kind of had a little giggle when I first heard this because I was like, Ugh, here we go, but also was like, yeah, I feel this a lot, Like I don't know that I'm like globe trotting and being like, oh, I'm living my best divorce life.

00:01:24
Speaker 1: Everybody look at me.

00:01:26
Speaker 2: But I definitely think that I have found myself again through divorce, you know.

00:01:33
Speaker 1: I mean that, like just as a soul woman.

00:01:36
Speaker 2: You know, leaving partnering aside, just as a sole woman, like finding myself in life again and getting to know who I am again, you know, at this point, after what was truly one of the one of the most difficult times of my entire life. Luis, let's pause for just a second. I'm going to bring in my friend and former Bachelor alum, Courtney Robertson Fun.

00:02:00
Speaker 4: Hi.

00:02:01
Speaker 2: Hi, look so beautiful Courtney. This is my friend Louise.

00:02:05
Speaker 5: She is nice to meet you.

00:02:06
Speaker 2: She's our single lady here and we are currently talking about this hot divorce summer.

00:02:13
Speaker 1: So Louise and I were just getting into it.

00:02:15
Speaker 2: I kind of shared where I was at, and then Louise was just about to tell me that she has living her best life.

00:02:21
Speaker 4: Well, I've been living my best life for about ten years now, and I have to tell you, once you experience this life, it's kind of hard to go back to what we were all dealing with unless we are with the unicorn. And as somebody who has older kids and kids who are out of the house and launched in post college. All of my friends are divorced and we have a great time. And I have to tell you, two of my friends just went through divorce and I just sold them building units in my building and we're creating Melrose Place up and down.

00:02:54
Speaker 5: It is like a modern day sorority. It's so much fun.

00:02:59
Speaker 2: That is, it's so much fun. I feel like I am having like fomo. Is that still a thing? I'm still having fomo.

00:03:04
Speaker 5: I can find you something here, don't.

00:03:06
Speaker 4: I'm a real turn But you know the truth is is to your point about what you said, So much of it is the energy and the aura and what you're feeling about yourself is what we're actually emitting off to everybody. Right, So the hot girl concept, hot divorce concept is almost a byproduct of what we're feeling on the inside, which is radiating off of us.

00:03:30
Speaker 1: Yeah, I totally agree.

00:03:31
Speaker 2: I think that people can people can see you coming from a mile away if they can see your confidence and your joy and your happiness, like that stuff bleeds through all aspects of your life.

00:03:43
Speaker 1: Cornea know that.

00:03:44
Speaker 2: You're just beginning to join us on this side of civilization. So tell us where you're at with your hot girl divorce summer.

00:03:52
Speaker 6: Well, I'm hot. It's one hundred and fifteen dec. It's been hot, no, like.

00:03:56
Speaker 1: Literally hot, literally she's smoking.

00:03:58
Speaker 6: I think I'm parimuntal and it's in Arizona. It's so hot. I just got a new residence and my divorce isn't final yet, so it doesn't feel I don't know, like I just learned about hot girl divorce summer. But I will say that I have lost some weight. I love a good breakup diet. And I've had more time because I'm splitting time with the kids now, so I have had more time to focus on Oh, you know what, I'm gonna go get my hair done. I'm gonna get my nails done. And there has been in the back of my mind like I need a glow up, you know. But my energy is getting stronger every day. I love that you talked about energy and your aura. And you know, I took my ring off and I've been going out in public and I'm like, oh my gosh, guys are checking me out, like somebody might hit on me, which I'm not looking for that. But I love the idea of your Melrose Place, living your best life with your your girlfriends. Because the more people that I talk to that are divorced are like, this is the.

00:05:03
Speaker 4: Best, it's the best way. I think I'm way ahead of you. I have to tell you, guys.

00:05:08
Speaker 1: We're like in the three stages of divorce here.

00:05:11
Speaker 5: Oh my god.

00:05:12
Speaker 4: We literally all we do is talk about all the losers we go out with. Okay, one woman's trash sometimes it's mostly not another woman's treasure. Yeah, we have so many stories we like rehash. We go on girls trips all the time. We're going next week a group of us to Vegas and we actually did divorce trips.

00:05:32
Speaker 5: I mean, it's really fun.

00:05:35
Speaker 6: This sounds like a reality show waiting to happen.

00:05:39
Speaker 5: I promise you.

00:05:41
Speaker 4: And here's the thing in life, as you guys know, as one door closes, other amazing doors open, right and we don't know what's coming, but we have to look at it. Life is happening for us, not to us. It's an opportunity and it's all about our lens. And I promise you, Courtney, as you're newer to this, you are going to hindsight twenty twenty and think divorce, as painful as it was, two happy homes is better than one unhappy home for all of our children, and for the kids to see us happy and thriving is everything, right. And I promise you you are going to remember this conversation and you are going to be the happiest person.

00:06:24
Speaker 5: I promise you.

00:06:25
Speaker 2: You know, I was just having this conversation with a friend of mine and just piggybacking on celebrating divorce. You know, Courtney, I know you and I have had many conversations about this, and one most recently when we were together in Tahoe.

00:06:37
Speaker 1: But there are phases of this, right.

00:06:41
Speaker 2: You will go down, and you will feel that so much over the coming years, but there is a part where you truly at least what I experienced once I got through some of those really high highs and the very very low lows, is that I truly began to celebrate myself again. I see so much stuff on social media and other clips and other podcasts of women talking about we're now living in a culture.

00:07:08
Speaker 1: Where we no longer need men, right.

00:07:11
Speaker 2: I think that as I was growing up, it was like I was taught, Okay, you go to school, you go to college, you get married, you have children, And that was what my life was, and I did those things, not necessarily so strictly, but I believe that we live in a world, in a generation right now, where that's not the way women are going. We provide for ourselves, and I am speaking for myself. I am a single woman raising two children, and what should be a dual income.

00:07:40
Speaker 1: Place that I put a roof over our heads.

00:07:43
Speaker 2: I buy our groceries, I buy their clothes, I pay for things we go on vacation.

00:07:47
Speaker 1: I'm doing it.

00:07:48
Speaker 2: I'm paying the water bill and the electricity bill and all of this stuff. I am finding joy and peace in my own So tell me why I need to date a man.

00:08:01
Speaker 5: It has to be additive.

00:08:03
Speaker 4: If it's not additive, your life is filled, right. I have my career, I have my family, I have my friends, I have my kids. I have the stuff I like to do on my own. So unless it's literally going to completely make my life that much more valuable by him being a slice of it, because he's never going to be twenty four to seven like it was when we first got married and we were having children. Right, We're way too evolved now as individuals and with all the different seasons and life transitions, and when your kids get older, you'll see the whole empty nesting thing is a whole different thing.

00:08:40
Speaker 5: And then not having a husband.

00:08:42
Speaker 4: You really have to reinvent yourself in terms of, you know, filling your dance card again.

00:08:47
Speaker 1: I think that I.

00:08:48
Speaker 2: Am truly okay with that and finding someone that kind of comes in and lifts you from a better place. You know. I don't know if I just have really bad luck or if I'm looking for love in all the wrong places, but I've only met men who would like to do their laundry in my home or like borrow twenty dollars.

00:09:09
Speaker 1: Like I don't know what I'm doing wrong, but.

00:09:11
Speaker 2: I am not getting hit on in the broccoli section at the Whole Foods?

00:09:15
Speaker 1: What am I not doing right?

00:09:17
Speaker 2: As a personal you know, as a person, as a woman, I am living my best life and feel more aligned than I ever have. But when it comes to dating and partnership, are my needs my desires for when I want in a partnership to hie or what am I not doing right?

00:09:43
Speaker 6: I think, Dan, I've known you for a long time. I'm a very strong, independent woman, and I don't know that you need a man. I don't know that you're you know, you talk about energy and stuff. I don't know that you want that. I don't do you do you want a party?

00:09:58
Speaker 4: I do? Yeah.

00:09:59
Speaker 2: I think that as humans human nature, we crave intimacy and partnership, and I do crave those things. But I guess that my bar has jumped so high that I'm not sure anybody will ever be able to meet.

00:10:15
Speaker 1: That, you know, physical needs aside.

00:10:18
Speaker 2: I'd really like to have safety in a relationship and a man that I feel safe with, you know, to be myself, to never be too much you know what I mean.

00:10:27
Speaker 6: Oh, that's a terrible feeling, because don't you want to just be able to be one hundred percent yourself.

00:10:32
Speaker 5: They're not the right person if they're making you feel that.

00:10:35
Speaker 1: You're too much.

00:10:47
Speaker 6: Louis, I mean you said, like, unless there's a unicorn, have you stumbled across any unicorns in your dating experience?

00:10:54
Speaker 4: I have dated a lot of amazing guys, and I can tell you that as I have done a lot of work on myself right because these years alone are opportunities to be constantly improving and becoming the best version of ourselves. So basically we attract where we think we are in our lives, right, and it gets better and better. And sure we have default you know, kind of go to reactions and behaviors, but I can tell you that as I have gotten, as I've worked out my edges that needed to be worked out, the level of people that I have met and been involved with obviously not the final destination.

00:11:39
Speaker 5: Right.

00:11:40
Speaker 4: I'm not remarried because it has to feel so right, and I have to feel truly like safe and like I'm ready to give up a lot of these amazing, you know kind of moments in my life to really lean into somebody. I haven't found that person yet, but there's been plenty of people that are really really good people, and I'm grateful for it, and I'm grateful for all the different experiences I have, right because you know, when we first, you know, we're young, and we all have this plan of our fairy tale, get married, have kids like we all did, right yea, And basically you know that fairy tale ended for a lot of us.

00:12:21
Speaker 5: Right.

00:12:21
Speaker 4: Every time I tell my children and somebody's getting divorced, they like look at me like I'm crazy, because doesn't everybody get divorced. I mean, how sad right that that's what they're you know, they're kind of floor that they're starting from. But you there's so many different ways to grow in this chapter, right and I will tell you to the point of Hot Divorce Girls summer is I look at most of my married friends and they're fing miserable.

00:12:49
Speaker 5: Okay, I don't want to be anyone of them. Let me take I go to dinner with my friends.

00:12:55
Speaker 4: I can spend what I want, drink what I want, come home, why to whatever show I want in the middle of the night, I don't.

00:13:02
Speaker 5: Have to answer to anybody.

00:13:04
Speaker 2: It's that kind of stuff right there, Luise that I'm like, why would I ever be in another relationship.

00:13:09
Speaker 5: Unless it is so amazing? But I'll tell you what you have to be careful for.

00:13:14
Speaker 4: As we get more and more comfortable and very you know, enjoying our lives, it does make it, to your point, that much harder to make rooms.

00:13:25
Speaker 5: So what happens is is you know, it's it's got to be really, I don't know you'll know it.

00:13:30
Speaker 4: I guess I haven't known it yet, But I have a great life, Like my plan tonight with my friends. I just got back from Europe with a group of girlfriends. I mean, we're going to New York in the fall. I mean it's like I can't even schedule, you know, dates, because I'm busy traveling with my friends.

00:13:44
Speaker 2: Oh my god, you are living your hot divorce a summer like you legit are like living it for us.

00:13:50
Speaker 4: But I also don't have kids at home, so I'm a bright step ahead of you. But it's not just hot divorce summer, guys. It's hot divorce all the time. It doesn't act in the summer. The only difference is you're wearing leather pants.

00:14:02
Speaker 5: You're not wearing a miniver. Do you see what I'm saying?

00:14:06
Speaker 4: And the truth is is, here's the sad thing. I don't know about you where you live in Arizona, but I know where you and I live. When does anybody approach a table and send drinks over?

00:14:17
Speaker 1: Not ever.

00:14:19
Speaker 6: I lived in la for fifteen years. I did the actor thing. I've dated some incredible men, really incredible men. I've had the fun in the twenties, the thirties, getting serious. The dating apps. Do you do dating apps?

00:14:32
Speaker 2: I have done dating apps, but I am telling you I never get hit on in the wild.

00:14:37
Speaker 1: I don't know why I have.

00:14:38
Speaker 2: A misting bitch face if I do not look approachable. I try to make eye contact. I try to smile. I try to make sure they see that there's no jewelry on my left hand. No, I do not get hit on. I don't get slid into my DMS or whatever it is the sliding.

00:14:55
Speaker 1: I don't get any of that. I get nothing. I get absolutely nothing.

00:15:00
Speaker 6: To change that into. Now watch you just said that, and it's like it's gonna just start happening.

00:15:06
Speaker 1: No, I put it out there, Courtney.

00:15:08
Speaker 5: No, I'm gonna change it for you.

00:15:10
Speaker 6: Were you thinking the same thing?

00:15:11
Speaker 5: No, I have to tell you I tried this this week. You're gonna think I'm crazy.

00:15:15
Speaker 6: No, I love a little woo woo.

00:15:16
Speaker 4: Oh.

00:15:17
Speaker 5: Nobody's more woo woo than me. I mean, come, you should see the.

00:15:20
Speaker 4: Crystals and the eleven elevens and dame. I mean my kids wear an eleven eleven. Now, it's like it's our family, you know, yes?

00:15:27
Speaker 5: Right? Anyways, So I.

00:15:29
Speaker 4: Was watching a TikTok and what the TikTok was saying was, if you're if you're out or you're at dinner, you're supposed to like touch your.

00:15:36
Speaker 6: Neck like the diessential or something.

00:15:39
Speaker 4: And when I was doing it, so God came up to be and talk to me.

00:15:43
Speaker 1: I was like, this is working, so you have to do that.

00:15:46
Speaker 4: Start like sitting there and just being like touching yourself, Like.

00:15:50
Speaker 2: I don't know what okay, So I did something similar.

00:15:52
Speaker 1: I had to admit. It has to feel somewhat.

00:15:56
Speaker 2: I guess natural to who I am, and I would tell you most of my life I have been the type of girl who always waits for the man to make the move.

00:16:04
Speaker 1: I have just always. I'm from the South, I have I believe.

00:16:08
Speaker 2: In very Jewry is not dead. I know, I know, but it's not working in my favor. I hope that like my hot girl summer looks like if I see a cute guy, that I would have the courage to go up and be like, oh my God, hi, Like I don't even know.

00:16:23
Speaker 1: What I would say.

00:16:24
Speaker 2: I don't think I have like game. I'm in Hawaii for work and I was just leaving the beach and i was walking and I'm just living my best life. I'm so happy. I was meditating and praying by the ocean and I'm smiling and I'm walking back, and I saw this man walk past me and he smiled and we made eye contact and I smiled back. And the whole way is I'm walking away. I thought, Oh, I hope he comes and approaches me, because I didn't have the guts to turn around and be like, oh my, did we have a moment like I didn't have the guts to do it. But the whole way up, I thought, oh God, if this is meant for me, let it find me, you know.

00:16:57
Speaker 1: And if it's not, then it won't.

00:16:58
Speaker 4: It'll drop in your lap when it's supposed to. I promise you, the universe is listening.

00:17:03
Speaker 5: It happens. I'll sit there and all of a sudden, it'll be like I'll be down or whatever.

00:17:08
Speaker 4: I'll just talk to the universe and randomly I'll get a call for a setup. I'm just saying, it's all about that energy. But one thing you could do is if you do you have a guy best friend.

00:17:19
Speaker 6: I do. Mine's actually here in town helping me move. I have a lot of guy friends that I actually didn't talk to while I was married, that I've reconnected with. And I told I was I'm sorry if i I'm just going to jump in here. I just had lunch with my family members today and they're like, how are you doing. I'm in that phase where everyone's like, you know, worried, and I'm like, I'm sad, I'm mad, I'm grieving. The kids are resilient, and I said, I don't ever want to get married again. And I know, Diana, you have felt that way before. But I have guy friends that help me out with things. We go to beautiful dinners, they're attractive, We talk about their dating lives and that sort of thing.

00:17:56
Speaker 5: And that's my point.

00:17:57
Speaker 4: It's what I think is really good is sometimes I have a guy best friend and I'll say to him, what am I giving off?

00:18:06
Speaker 6: Oh yeah, they'll tell you because.

00:18:07
Speaker 5: They tell you so, Deanna.

00:18:10
Speaker 4: So maybe if you think you're giving off, resting bitch, please.

00:18:13
Speaker 2: I just asked this guy who is a close friend of mine. I was like, is something on? Is something wrong with my face?

00:18:19
Speaker 1: Is this why?

00:18:19
Speaker 2: And he said, no, you're just too hot. And guys won't approach a woman who's too hot because they think you're taken. And I was like, wave that, Okay, I don't think that I'm just too hot. I don't think I'm unattractive, but I would never label myself as I'm just so hot that I'm unapproachable.

00:18:36
Speaker 1: But like, what should I cut my hair off?

00:18:38
Speaker 7: Like?

00:18:39
Speaker 1: What should I do?

00:18:39
Speaker 2: Oh?

00:18:40
Speaker 6: Do not cut things?

00:18:41
Speaker 5: But never so hair off.

00:18:42
Speaker 6: You're in Hawaii, that's not geographically desirable, and I because you live in LA.

00:18:47
Speaker 1: But a lot of people come here from.

00:18:49
Speaker 6: LA to hang out and visit I and you were saying that you would never You're old school. I have been, especially when I was single, like I just will start talking to everybody. I was raised that way. My mom was like, you know, we talked to the butcher the floor is but I would say, like I be brave.

00:19:05
Speaker 1: Well I'm laughing.

00:19:07
Speaker 2: I'm laughing because our producer Heather just sent me a message, who is also single, mind you, and said you should.

00:19:12
Speaker 7: Just go up and say hey nice, sure, No, No, what you should do is when you feel, like, for example, on the beach, that you wanted to say, hey, do we just have a moment and you just opted not to because of fear or whatever, you have to say to yourself, I am going to.

00:19:27
Speaker 4: Practice opposite action, and you're going to have to force yourself to do something different because if you want a different.

00:19:33
Speaker 5: Result, you have to be different.

00:19:36
Speaker 4: If you want change, you have to change, right, because if we do everything the same, we're just going to get the same result. So if it's not working, what's the worse that happens? Did we have a moment?

00:19:47
Speaker 5: No? Okay, Yeah, I.

00:19:49
Speaker 1: Don't think I'm scared of that.

00:19:50
Speaker 2: I think I'm stuck in that mentality that I want I want a man to do that part. I think I am in that mentality where I take charge and I lead in almost every single aspect of my life. I am a boss, and I think this is the one place where I would love it if a man was able to be a man. I said this in our last podcast, Courtney, I need to be outmanned.

00:20:15
Speaker 1: I need to be outmanned.

00:20:17
Speaker 4: If you're just using it as the dialogue to start a conversation, it's not like you're saying, hey, let's go out, Oh hey, let me buy your dinner, oh hey, let me text you after the date to say great date.

00:20:28
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm not doing those things.

00:20:30
Speaker 6: Say. I use humor as like a flirt, like flirting, like I I think I'm pretty good at it. I'd be like, hey, cutie, where are you from what's your name, what's your side?

00:20:39
Speaker 4: Oh?

00:20:40
Speaker 6: I would, But I mean it's also just like you could brighten somebody else's day by engaging with them. We live in a society where everybody's walking around, they're on their phones. I do think men have so many options these days, with all these dating apps and my single guy friends and what I've heard about these dating apps, what is out there is wild? My mind is blown. But if you want that old school interaction, I get it. You want that. I think that it's out there, but maybe you're not hanging in out the right places.

00:21:12
Speaker 2: I mean, well, it's hard because I will tell you I am not hanging out at the right places. If I get forty eight hours at home alone without my children, what am I doing?

00:21:23
Speaker 5: You guys?

00:21:24
Speaker 2: Relax, doing laundry, I'm catching up on sleep, I'm binging a good show on Netflix.

00:21:29
Speaker 1: And I'm ordering takeout.

00:21:30
Speaker 2: I am not going out to be seen like so, I'm also complaining. I'm not complaining about being alone. I love my life and I feel very joyful and full in pretty much almost every aspect. But I am also not I'm not opening up that part of me either. When I get free time away from my kids. I am rebooting me because I know when the kids come back, I've got to be back at one hundred percent mom. So I don't know that our savior is going to be dropping someone at my front door while I'm in my pjs and eating my tie takeout.

00:22:16
Speaker 4: Do you have a crew of divorce friends to go out?

00:22:21
Speaker 5: Okay? I do?

00:22:22
Speaker 1: I do, I do, But I'm not so sure.

00:22:24
Speaker 2: My children would like for me to live my best divorce a life. And I love that we're doing this today because Corty's kids are really really young.

00:22:31
Speaker 1: Mine are somewhere right.

00:22:33
Speaker 2: In the middle, and Luisa sounds like yours are older and are out of the house.

00:22:36
Speaker 4: They went to college and they said, this is what they said to me. Meanwhile, my ex husband's had a girlfriend forever. Okay, and I literally when I had my kids, I was all in and I didn't bring them around anything.

00:22:50
Speaker 5: I lived very compartmentalized.

00:22:52
Speaker 4: But when they both went to college, it was like they didn't want to worry about me anymore. They go, well, you did a great job, now go get yourself married. Other it's we don't want to worry about you, but you did a great job, and we're ready to support you now.

00:23:03
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I'm at that phase.

00:23:05
Speaker 2: And I know, Courtney, all of this is still so new to you. So I'm really eager to hear what your your best life looks like this summer as you are, as you are entering all aspects of divorce.

00:23:17
Speaker 6: But like, yeah, like I'll feel better once it's finalized. And you know it's going to take more time. But I've been separated since June, and I was like so excited and my heart is open to Like I said, I'll never get married again. But my primary focus is I have a six year old, almost five year old and a two year old. I have a new house, nesting, getting it set up, like you're sitting paying your own bills. I got just internet so I can stream my shows. But I've just been realizing I just want to do beautiful dinner parties. I want to surround myself with really interesting people when my batteries are full. And I'm a boss too. I have my podcast and I got some citing things in the works. I you know, I am not and we talked about this in Tahoe. I am not the person to just be a stay at home mom. I basically did it for a year with my baby and I was going crazy. So I don't know. I just I don't know if I'm going to be dating anytime soon. I've definitely had some options, but it just feels a little bit too soon. I'm still in like the healing rebuilding phase. Yeah, but I'm also not saying no, you.

00:24:26
Speaker 2: Know, okay, So run this out for me then, because I'm sorry if that was disjointed, it's I just haven't really no.

00:24:34
Speaker 1: No.

00:24:34
Speaker 2: I think that that's super helpful because I think that everybody, you know, the people out there listening to this podcast too, I do part two. You know, everyone is in a different place, right. Some people are just starting out. Some people are like me where they're like in the groove of things, and some people are like Luis where they are just you know, finding whatever that looks like in that part of a normal.

00:24:53
Speaker 1: So so I think what I'm going to do.

00:24:55
Speaker 2: I would love to ask your advice since I don't have that get her mentality.

00:25:02
Speaker 1: So run this out for me, because I would like to date.

00:25:06
Speaker 2: I would I feel pretty full in all places of my life, but I would love to spend my free time with someone that I genuinely care about. And yeah, I was going to say something really filthy, but I'll keep that to myself.

00:25:17
Speaker 1: So run this out for me.

00:25:19
Speaker 6: Hey, we all have needs. There's nothing wrong with having pleasure.

00:25:22
Speaker 1: Along the human nature. It is human nature. We all have needs. It's it is what it is. So I'm out with my girlfriends.

00:25:30
Speaker 2: We are having drinks, we're living our best divorce summer and having the most fun. And we notice this guy at the table next to us, who is single, appears to be single.

00:25:44
Speaker 1: What do I do?

00:25:45
Speaker 2: Further, girl who doesn't want to make a.

00:25:47
Speaker 1: Move, tell me what to do.

00:25:49
Speaker 4: So I think, really, what it is is it's up to your friend who can wing wing man you.

00:25:55
Speaker 6: And I'm a really good wing woman. I wish I was there.

00:25:57
Speaker 4: I am like you in that I don't make the first move. I am all about tradition and chivalry and setting that tone right from the gate. But I have a lot of friends who are great at wing manning, and we will all do it for each other. And you come from a place of confidence when you're almost not the one. You're like one step removed on that putting yourself out there. But the most important thing is is go out feeling good about yourself and have fun.

00:26:25
Speaker 5: With your friends.

00:26:26
Speaker 4: Because I know women that go out just to meet a guy, and it's obvious to the guys. They want to see a person who's living their best life and who feels really good about themselves and what they're doing, and that will translate yeah and ad guy, that's what they want. They don't want the girl who's like on the prow.

00:26:47
Speaker 2: Listen, ladies, I am never going out just to meet a man.

00:26:50
Speaker 1: I am not. I am traveling the world.

00:26:52
Speaker 2: I'm eating good food, I'm catching a tan, I'm reading a good book.

00:26:55
Speaker 1: I am never doing that.

00:26:57
Speaker 2: I am always going out with the intention of of being surrounded by the women that I love in that moment. And maybe that's maybe that's why this isn't working out for me. Maybe I have to choose the next thing. What's the next thing again, Louise, I got to.

00:27:12
Speaker 4: Find that TikTok for you because I really tried it. It was it was crazy. But I think find a friend, even a friend like I have married friends.

00:27:20
Speaker 1: Who love to go out.

00:27:21
Speaker 5: It's like pseudo cheating for them.

00:27:23
Speaker 4: Quite frankly, oh yeah right, because they're so unhappy. I mean, they are so into talking to people because it's quote legalized because they're doing it on my behalf or right, but they that is the best way to do it, and then it just opens it up and it's more organic.

00:27:40
Speaker 1: So where are you meeting people, Louise?

00:27:42
Speaker 2: I hear you in saying that you're not going out with those intentions, but like, where are you meeting people?

00:27:47
Speaker 5: Set ups? Only setups?

00:27:49
Speaker 4: Oh?

00:27:49
Speaker 1: Really, okay?

00:27:50
Speaker 2: Because I heard you say no dating apps. You're not going out looking thirsty like you are literally relying on your close people to set you up with other single people.

00:28:00
Speaker 4: Or like friends of friends or and oh here's the other thing. You have to tell people you're open to being set up because people aren't focused on that in their day. They're all busy, they're focused on themselves. But I have found that sometimes I'll say, oh, you know, I still haven't found the person that I'm so into, do you know anyone? And all of a sudden, like they'll think of somebody, or it'll stay with them, or somebody else will bring it up to them and they'll say, oh, you should call her.

00:28:29
Speaker 5: She would be a.

00:28:30
Speaker 4: Great you know, a great set. So it's putting it out there as well.

00:28:35
Speaker 2: I'll have to think about that because I feel like a lot of my I have, like maybe I've compartmentalized my life. I have like my guy friends, and I have like my single divorce friends, and then they have like my married friends.

00:28:46
Speaker 1: Right, I don't know that I have any of.

00:28:49
Speaker 2: Those that quite mesh with the other. So I'm either a mom and with all my married group and I'm the only single divorced woman there. They're all coupled up and married and I'm like, oh, here we go. Or I'm like, don't have my kids, and I'm out with my single divorced women that I love, and then we're all single. Right, so we're all at dinner and we're all noticing the same hot guy, But there's.

00:29:09
Speaker 4: An ass for every saddle, right, Like the truth of the matter is is.

00:29:14
Speaker 5: Not it's like people are gonna it's a chemistry.

00:29:17
Speaker 4: I mean, it truly is a chemistry, right, So, I mean, who you're gonna match with or feel something with is maybe not who Courtney's going to. There is a kind of a unknown factor to that, Okay, But I feel like, you know, there's also people.

00:29:32
Speaker 5: Do you ever meet people through work?

00:29:34
Speaker 1: No, I'm a slight attendant and I'm on the road.

00:29:37
Speaker 2: Okay, so let me roll out. We're gonna wrap this up. This is such a great conversation about an airplane.

00:29:42
Speaker 5: I feel it's easy to meet people on an airplane.

00:29:45
Speaker 2: Well, first off, it's frowned upon and it goes against my contract that I signed.

00:29:50
Speaker 1: I'm not allowed to date my clients.

00:29:52
Speaker 2: I work in private aviation, Louise, not in not in airline. So I'm gonna roll out this scenario for you real and this conversation is so good. We have got to just keep this going, I think, and just and just live our best lives for the rest of everybody else listening to I do Part two, but just for your visualization.

00:30:11
Speaker 1: I went to dinner last night with my two pilots.

00:30:14
Speaker 2: They are old enough to be my dad, and one of them flew his wife in to come to Hawaii for a few days, and so the four of us are at dinner. My one pilot is sitting across from me with his wife, and then I'm sitting next to my other pilot. It looks like we're on a double date. And I'm with my old man boyfriend. So no, I'm not getting hit out I'm here, go.

00:30:34
Speaker 4: Take up golf lessons, join a running club, Like, if there's something, what are you passionate about?

00:30:40
Speaker 1: I've been working out every day. I've been working out. I've been getting my steps in.

00:30:44
Speaker 2: I'm in the gym with all the guys and I'm doing my bicep curls and I'm a little crap top.

00:30:49
Speaker 1: I've got my tummy thing.

00:30:51
Speaker 7: You know.

00:30:51
Speaker 4: Not a chance nobody's coming up to you looking on Not a chance, No, not a chance people are.

00:30:57
Speaker 5: Not not coming up to you. I mean, really, I.

00:31:00
Speaker 6: Don't believe you men thetis. I don't believe you. And I it sounds like you do manifest Dana, I do, Cordney. And one of the best dating advice tips that I got before I met my husband and was married to, well my ex husband, was to like visualize, like what physically down to everything. How do they treat you? How do they treat your family? You know, what does a weekend look like to you? And just like really get quiet with yourself and then you'll attract that is personally something you know, I think that the universe provides. I don't think it's you know, I think and you believe in a higher power being at the right place at the right time. You just you might have a meet cute But.

00:31:39
Speaker 1: I don't know.

00:31:39
Speaker 6: I don't date in LA anymore. But I don't have all the answers clearly, all right, So what I.

00:31:46
Speaker 2: Gathered from this entire conversation is that the next cute guy I see, I'm gonna have to go up to me and be like.

00:31:52
Speaker 6: Hello, nice, Sure, why do not just wave?

00:31:55
Speaker 5: You know?

00:31:55
Speaker 4: Another good place to meet people, Honestly, Chateau Marmont. I would never go sit at a bar and have dinner by myself.

00:32:03
Speaker 5: We're in LA.

00:32:04
Speaker 4: But if you are on like a trip, for example, in New York, Chicago, Dallas, Boston.

00:32:11
Speaker 5: Let me tell you something.

00:32:12
Speaker 4: It is very normal to go down to the bar at a really nice hotel, okay, and sit there and have dinner. You will meet a ton of people. One part, you would be more approachable. We're all approachable.

00:32:24
Speaker 2: Dyane, Louise, I've done this for sixteen years. This is this is so good. We have got to do this again. Ladies Louise and Courtney, thank you so much for joining me today. I have so many more questions tips for the trades. I feel like I need to go on a date and like our producer Heather can put you guys in my ear with the little headphone and you guys can talk me through it because I don't have the guts to do.

00:32:43
Speaker 6: But you just let me a wing man, or I'll fly out there, or maybe I'll set you up. I could set you up with some guys. Yeah.

00:32:49
Speaker 4: See, that was the whole purpose. Nothing is random. You're gonna set her up.

00:32:52
Speaker 2: It's her guy, right, sixteen years in this industry, ladies, I eat at the bar alone all the time, and no one never approaches me.

00:33:01
Speaker 1: I cannot.

00:33:03
Speaker 2: I am so ready for a hot divorce a summer. Are you already having one? And you want to tell us about it? Send us an email or leave us a voicemail. All of the infos in the show notes. Follow us on all of our socials. I do Part two an iHeartRadio podcast where

00:33:19
Speaker 1: Falling in love is the main objective.