Love You, Hate Your Politics

Hi Tribe! Welcome back to the wonderful world of Good Moms Bad Choices! We continue to carry on the torch of No F*cks Given January in this week’s episode as Erica and Milah discuss the pain of politics, expired relationships, and why it's never too late to face your fears.
In this week’s episode, Erica and Milah prepare for the Inauguration and discuss their feelings about the outcome of the November 2024 U.S. Presidential election. After months of consuming sensationalized news coverage, fiery opinions post across social media, and surprising revelations about whom certain loved ones cast votes for, the Good Moms ask: are we still friends after the election? What you can expect to hear:
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Erica and Milah discuss their 400 million dollar lottery dreams and the ideal first big purchase 6:55
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Bad Choice of the Week: Grocery shopping with your Ex….but a different kind of groceries 9:43
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The Good Moms Prayer: Sometimes, God wants you to let it go 19:33
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Love You, Hate Your Politics: Dealing with Inauguration anxiety and navigating politics in friendship 23:15
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My Boyfriend Has A Wife! In this week’s SecretSafe segment, the Good Moms read a write-in story from a listener and teach us where there’s a Martin, there’s always a Gina! 44:44
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Revenge of the Late-in-Lifers: Erica and Milah share personal stories of trying new things as you get older and why facing fear is good for your children. 58:59
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Speaker 1: Once upon a time there was a good old traditional housewife. She couldn't. She cleaned and cared for her children and the man of the house, and of course she didn't talk back. She was both obeed, hint and soft by nature. She was a good woman who always made.
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Speaker 2: Good choices that ship off. We're good mom's bad choices. Two single mom who said fuck the patriarchy, shared all their bad choices and sound out they were so bad. After all, we're experts. Over shares and your new besties. Sit back and enjoy the ride. I can do a bad mom.
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Speaker 3: I can do an d me my Flowers. I can play it back powers Powers plays.
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Speaker 2: A welcome back to good Mom's bad choices.
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Speaker 4: I'm Mela and I'm Erica, and.
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Speaker 2: We're back, motherfuckers. It's the ogs an uncensored motherhood. I can do that. On my shout out to our new music. I don't know if you guys peeped, but we've had the same music for over six years that we just had to randomly buy because we were using license music. But now we've leveled up and we got new music that's personalized to us, with lyrics and artists and beats and shit. So watch out. Good Moms is about to drop an album.
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Speaker 4: Shout out to Renee and Trip who are on the track, and to Anthem Enterprise Music who supported us.
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Speaker 2: With the production.
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Speaker 4: Shout out to them if you need any sort of podcast music.
00:01:37
Speaker 2: Really not just podcasts, any jingle because they're not even jingles. They're like low.
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Speaker 5: Key, like amazing music producers.
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Speaker 4: Yeah, so I mean I'm going to start my music career, my late life music career. Actually it's my reignited music career, and I might have to hit them.
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Speaker 5: Up for some hot beats.
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Speaker 2: Our beat is pretty hot. I don't know if you guys peeped it, but maybe we need to rewind and hear it again. Here, I'll do it for you. I can do bad all on my no for a new appreciate Oh, and you can't hold me back. I can do bad all on my own, and you can't hold me back. Give me my flowers. I can make in twenty four hours champagne showers. When I heard that, I was like, yeah, yeah, I'm not a bad mom, but a bad mom. We're gonna have to learn the rap. You guys haven't heard the full song yet, because we're gonna upload it on Spotify.
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Speaker 4: Caasting, and we can't put the whole thing even though we thought about it.
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Speaker 2: We considered putting all three minutes, but we're gonna just upload it separately on Spotify, So keep your eye out or some custom bitches that we do custom shit. Everything we do is custom. There's nothing we do that's not custom because, like you said, champagne showers custom bitches, luxury. Okay, no half passing over here Hererie twenty twenty five. Anyway, Hi, Hi, happy day, Happy Wednesday, Happy Hemp Day. How are you feeling. I feel good.
00:02:57
Speaker 4: I My titties are out for the utibe tubers. My skin is clear, my hair I'd put a color deposit in to just boost the red today, so we're boosted.
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Speaker 2: My jewel you know, I was thinking, how do you.
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Speaker 4: Guys feel about wearing jewelry from an egg, like not from an ex but like represents like an X thing, Like do you throw away jewelry that like someone gifted you? Like yeah, sure if they gifted it to you, or like you got it together, like do not wear the jewelry anymore?
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Speaker 2: I wear I will continue to wear whatever I want if it's still cute. I don't feel like.
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Speaker 4: If Orlando had like a ring that an X gave him, would you be mad he was wearing, or like a necklace.
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Speaker 2: Some ear rings. Yeah, I'll just hide it. Okay, where is it? I don't know what are you talking about? That's it was ugly anyway, I was thinking.
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Speaker 4: I was just I was just thinking about that because I look down and I have this ring on that I bought, and I bought a match one for me and my my ex. And he lost his like the day, like I think the next day that he wore, which was very representative. He was out in the streets.
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Speaker 2: He was in came from.
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Speaker 4: He was in Portugal at the Afro Beats, probably hoeing and hearing, and he lost it in the sand. And then I was like, this is very symbolic. But I was like, I still have mine, And I.
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Speaker 2: Was like, am I not supposed to wear this anymore? Because I like it? I don't think it works that way. He lost his? Fuck him, it's not even connected him. Yours is connected to Portugal because we're supposed to go there next year for the festival. That's what I really like to do.
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Speaker 5: Anyway, I'm good.
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Speaker 2: It's just kind of random thought because I looked down in my hand and I was like, oh yeah, oh yeah, that persons I'm not so I'm not supposed to wear this. I don't think it works that way. I'm doing good. I am really, really really excited to be leaving soon to go to Costa Rica. I feel like this February trip is always at a time where I really really need to get there, So time between August and February, I'm like, what the fuck has happened? And I need to reset and refill my jungle cup and eat real food and be on the beach and like be with my tribe with our titties out and eating fresh food. And so I'm really looking forward to this. I'm looking forward to like just jumping in and turning off. I'm plugging from this bullshit and treating myself. And so if you guys are listening and you're like, oh, it's too late to go, wait away. I didn't. I didn't put my deposit down because I'm so stupid. I bought I bought all these presents for all these other niggas except myself. I bought titties instead of a trip. Titties are nice, that's a nice gift. I thought you were gonna say, because I don't know about that.
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Speaker 4: If you brought titties, you really need to come to the trip and show them, honestly.
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Speaker 2: You know, somebody a couple of years ago, I got some new titties and I saw them recently and they'd start they dropped, and I was like, those are like good girl. But anyway, I don't have new titties yet, but one of these trips I am going to debut my new titties.
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Speaker 5: Maybe you should go, I'm Costa Rica.
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Speaker 2: To Colombia, I haven't heard a lot. Maybe go to Panama. Do they have good plastic surgery and Panama? I don't know, but probably they have everything in Panama. I need to do more research. I feel like everyone even have good titties in Costa Rica. Maybe I mean everybody has a good titty doctor, but it'll probably be significantly less. But I feel like Columbia people go for those those those teeth in that ass, and I'm I'm not gonna. I can't. I can't. Those teeth be big, real big. You gotta go to Turkey.
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Speaker 4: You don't even gotta go to Columbia for the big teeth, bitch, you can go here for the big teeth.
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Speaker 2: But why would I pay all that money to get big teeth in America?
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Speaker 4: I could say, hey, womping's it's an aesthetic right now, the big.
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Speaker 2: Teeth my homegirls. Shut out to my homegirl, that'd be called teeth. Shut out to Becky, she actually got big teeth on purpose. She said, it's a sign of prestige. Would you get new teeth? No? If you got a bag, no, okay, if you won the lottery right now for four hundred million dollars, what's the first thing you're going to do? Invest I'm gonna take like a twenty four hour period and lock my door and just sit in it and just be like, what do I do next? What I do next?
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Speaker 5: I thought you wanted me to tell me what I was gonna do with my fucking money. Not like I'm gonna go in meditation.
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Speaker 2: I'm just asking what was No.
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Speaker 4: I'm gonna go buy some properties, for sure, go buy some land. I'm going to read you my whole wardrobe. I'm going to Oh, I'm gonna buy I'm gonna buy floor an apartment.
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Speaker 5: I'm going to get an old school car because.
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Speaker 2: I like my dream. I really want an old school car too.
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Speaker 4: Yesterday and everyone me and everyone on a bike ride and we were driving. We were like on our bikes and this like old white man, like this beautiful like cherry red El Camino.
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Speaker 5: Is that what it's called.
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Speaker 4: I'm so bad with the names of the old if that's why, I just know that I want one. I don't know which one I want anyway. It was a red El Camino and he had his hair all slipped back and he had his cool glasses on. And I just wrote by and I was like, nice car man. He was like yeah, And I was like he's been waiting for someone to tell him that all day. And I was like, I can't wait to get in my car and someone to tell me that.
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Speaker 2: I've been dying to do an old timey shoot in an old car. But it just hasn't happened yet. But it's on our list in twenty twenty four, right, twenty twenty five. Shit, I forgot that. It's twenty twenty five already, sure is anyway? Oh, actually, one more thing about the lottery. If you win the lottery, don't tell anyone, and you have to don't sign the back of it. Actually claim it in a in a business that you opened in a state where they can't tell you. They can't it's not public record who owns it, so don't say I never touched for anything. Any daddy hides all his money. Interesting probably.
00:08:48
Speaker 4: Going by Oh, back to the retreat though, if you guys do want to come to the retreat, we do have spots available.
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Speaker 5: There's a link in this description.
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Speaker 2: We do have a special code for the last minute bitches, because I know you're a last minute but last minute bitches deserve luxury too. Yeah, use code Tribe for a substantial, substantial discount if you really really want to come and bring your bestie, and maybe we'll even give you a better discount. Don't say good moms didn't give you anything for the holiday season, because we're giving you the luxury of rest. It's up to you if you take it. You bitches want to give everything to everybody else except yourself, but this is us telling you you are also worthy and important of rest. Amen.
00:09:29
Speaker 4: Hm. We have a segment on our show called bad Choice of the Week, and last week I shared mine, which was a sex injury, and you guys got a big kick out of that, and we actually have a submission for a bad choice of the week this week straight from our Facebook group.
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Speaker 2: This bad choice of the week is.
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Speaker 4: So My bad choice of the week is I've been entertaining my baby daddy, my current ex. I'm dating a different new guy, but I let my baby daddy eat the groceries and I think I'm in love again.
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Speaker 2: First of all, I just want to say it for the record. You lying you ain't in love, bitch. No for a reason you didn't just let him eat the groceries. That is just as as an adult, it just doesn't exist. I've been there. I backtracked many times letting a nigga eat groceries and guess what every time happened, his dick went in my vagina. I don't know, I've had pussy aiden left. It's very rare. I feel like the one time it happened, I was literally like pushing the nigga out the door and like closing it after fast, because you can't.
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Speaker 4: When you do that, you don't. Actually, she probably doesn't really like this nigga at all, so then you.
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Speaker 2: She obviously does. She thinks she's in love again, and she has a new boyfriend, that's true.
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Speaker 4: I just like when I didn't like a nigga, I had him eat my pussy and then I kicked him out.
00:10:46
Speaker 5: I didn't come. I didn't want his penis inside of me.
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Speaker 2: I don't play those type of games. I learned early on. If you eat my pussy, you're gonna want this pussy. I know how the pussy works, and I know how my pussy works, and so I'm just gonna do it harder.
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Speaker 5: You want to give him the pussy.
00:11:00
Speaker 2: It's hard for me if I if you start eating my pussy or my groceries, I'm the likelihood of me going to the next level ninety nine point nine percent chance or Hi, wait, and with the groceries, pussy or ass as. You don't know, Jay, when I know what you're saying, what we're talking about pussy, I'm just saying in general, you eat anything below the waist, we're going there. So her maybe Daddy ate her ass. That must be some top tier ass eating. I'm assuming he did the whole thing. Could you imagine just the ass? Actually I can't.
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Speaker 5: I went through that.
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Speaker 2: What do you mean? Oh, oh my god, I forgot about that. Oh my god. We gotta tell him. So, a couple of years ago, Erica was seeing a guy. Seeing is a strong strong word. She was having sex a few times with this guy who she came to tell me. She was like, so he told me that he has a condition with his penis. I was like, what kind of condition? She was like, he can only he can't get head because it's like the saliva gets bacteria, but he can get his ass eight. I said, Eric, that's a fucking lie. She said, no, there's something with this. I said, but she could put his penis in your vagina, but you can't put your mouth on it. But you could put your mouth on his asshole. She said yeah. And then we talked about on the podcast. And then and then someone sent it to him a girl, another girl he had been fucking with it telling the same spiel. Said, Look, it's so funny this girl is dating someone who has the same condition. And it was the same nigga. And she too thought it was suspicious, like I thought it was suspicious because the nigga was lying. There is no condition. For those who are wondering, No, I did not eat his ass. You did it? Know what the fuss? So would you say? You just said something, I'm gonna go skip the dick and go to that. I don't know. I just hell know. I thought that meant that you just said, Okay, you're absolutely the fun. Okay, I just don't look anything. Yeah, I know we're not not you know what. I pictured like, he's got to start somewhere. We're not had his legs in the air, was like, so just go a little bit lower, and you're like.
00:13:00
Speaker 4: No, this conversation happened before we even started that process, Like I think we were making out, hooking up, and then he said it, and.
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Speaker 2: Can you give me an example, like we're making up and I like, oh wait, wait, wait, wait, yeah, hold hold on, I gotta tell you something.
00:13:18
Speaker 5: Yes, the labi makes my my dick breakout, but not my asshole, not my asshole.
00:13:22
Speaker 2: Just make sure you don't get us lava in between the guch and the dick. Is that what he said? No, sure, yes, that's what he said. Ladies, if you've heard about this condition, please call in. Yeah, let us know what is it called. I'm curious. I even google it. He's gonna have to lead with a real, actual scientific name in the future. I bet he's figured it out now that he likes only his asshole played with.
00:13:46
Speaker 4: Yeah, maybe he's like more vocal about just like being strong about that positioning.
00:13:50
Speaker 2: I would rather say I don't really enjoy head, but I do enjoy getting that ass ey because the medical condition. I would have cracked up in his face. I would have been like, what, I was trying to be kind until you talked from on the podcast, and I'm pretty sure that was the last time he ever told bitches that ever, who's kind on podcasts? Who's kind on podcasts? Honestly, that's true. I mean we try, really, I try to be nice in person.
00:14:13
Speaker 5: I'm a bitch on the podcast.
00:14:14
Speaker 2: No, we're not bitches, we're nice ish. Well, my dear, with your bad choice, I'm gonna tell you that it's just an overall bad choice. If you broke up with your baby daddy, it's likely that you don't want him anymore, and you probably don't need to let him eat your groceries or you're pussy or stick it in that it's not even the tip.
00:14:33
Speaker 4: I know it's no fucks given January, but we gotta give a fucks about this type of shit.
00:14:36
Speaker 2: You can't backslide. In twenty twenty five, we got to move on. We have got to move on. She submitted this, I think still in twenty twenty four, So I'm gonna hope that she just left the grocery eating the baby daddy grocery eating back in twenty twenty four. Just teach your new nigga how to do it.
00:14:53
Speaker 5: I know, yeah, because I'm sorry, I had a vision of your Yeah.
00:14:59
Speaker 2: I was like, you know what, I'm so happy for growth and progress because right now, it seems you probably says like, oh, I like him, he's so cute, he can eat my ass really well. But there will be your time where you're like you're throw up in your mouth just from we were crying over them. Remembone used to cry about them. Weird, right, it's such a strange time.
00:15:19
Speaker 4: It's such a weird concept, you know for those like really truly, if you're listening to this right now, you're going through like a breakup with your child's father, or like maybe you guys are broken up, but you're like still kind of in that weird in between, like I want my family bag.
00:15:31
Speaker 2: I can't believe I can't believe it. I'll never get over it.
00:15:35
Speaker 4: Like you think that your story is like the only one, Like, no bitch has ever gone through this shit ever in history.
00:15:41
Speaker 5: We have, And I promise you, I promise you, not only.
00:15:45
Speaker 2: Will you get over it, it will be so much better.
00:15:48
Speaker 4: You will get over your baby daddy. We are testaments that nigga will be removed from your not your heart or your mind. You're always in me family, right, Maybe I don't know, Oh.
00:16:02
Speaker 2: Well, it depends. It depends what the setup is. Yours is different than most, and so is mine, maybe not most, But I will say, like you do you time. My mom always says this time is the greatest neutralizer.
00:16:16
Speaker 4: It is true, Like I literally could not see a time where I could just be okay, where I would get the news that he had another child and I would not give a fuck.
00:16:27
Speaker 5: In fact, I was on the blogs eating popcorn.
00:16:31
Speaker 4: Saying, no way, that's just crazy, Like, never did I think I would be able to do that.
00:16:37
Speaker 2: That's because yours is a fucking he's like a serial a serial childmaker.
00:16:45
Speaker 4: He likes to make children, you know. And and thankfully, like now, I'm I'm very It's not even that I'm numb to it. I've just like released it, let it go. I'm totally cool with that. And in fact, like I was telling one of our friends went through a similar situation.
00:16:59
Speaker 2: Boy did she She went, honestly like what I like seeing her. I like seeing our friends go through break up. But it's so interesting to see friends start where we were at, where they'd be like so sad, can't get over it, can't get past it, crying every day, and then suddenly like something switches and then they're outside. Yeah.
00:17:22
Speaker 4: But I was telling her, and you know, because I was telling her this like a year ago, and where she was like could not see the time, could not see the day that it would happen.
00:17:31
Speaker 5: And I was telling her, bitch, I bathed his baby, like.
00:17:35
Speaker 2: I recently, like this was like two years ago. Oh I don't remember this.
00:17:39
Speaker 4: Yeah, Like when I went over there with Iri and they both needed a bath, and so I bathed them both and I just couldn't Like it was actually very healing for me to like be able to wash your hands of the bullshit while wash I washed my hands the bullshit, and I was like, this is.
00:17:52
Speaker 5: Not this child's fault.
00:17:53
Speaker 4: And I never thought that I would get to that point because I was I felt like, you know the way that she was feeling and like you know, like which was like seeing red. Like everyone has to go, like when you get territory, your territorial over what you've created and it's and it's it's expected, and that's okay.
00:18:16
Speaker 2: But you will get past it if you allow yourself to. You have to allow yourself to. You have to remove yourself from this situation. You have to stop trying, trying, trying. You have to stop trying.
00:18:28
Speaker 4: You have to stop trying to pretend, like you have to show this family structure to the world and to your child.
00:18:35
Speaker 2: Something has to change. And the sooner you release it, and the sooner you let it go, and the sooner you tell yourself, I can do this and I'm okay, the quicker the process starts. I held myself back so long from fucking around just because I'm a slow lowner and I really was just like connected to this idea. And as soon as I really let that shit go, like shit started to move, like like my heart healed so much faster. But sometimes I think as women, we cling so hard to the title and to the family, and you know, honestly, I used to think it's because I'm a black woman, and like as a black woman, you never want to be a baby mama. You never want to be like you know, there's an idea that black families don't keep the family structure, and so you're fighting for like to prove something, not to prove like not to be with the stereotype. But our friend is not black, and she was fighting pretty hard. So I think it's just like a motherly instinct to want to keep the family unit together. But you can still be a family in your own unit and him and his own unit. So just like no sooner whoever is hearing this, and I know someone out there is going through it right now in the midst of the thick of it, your baby daddy is it's just not working. Sometimes God makes shit so bad for you you have to let it go. Let it be bad. And those of you who are still in the relationship and you know deep in your motherfucking gut that it's over, but you keep trying, and you keep praying, and you keep trying to raiki niggas and go to shamans and the church and baptisms and counseling full moons and everything you can possibly do. I'm telling you do one thing. You say the prayer. You say, dear God, if this is not meant for me, please make it so so bad that it's so clear I don't even have a choice but to walk away from this nigga. And let me tell you, be careful before you say it out loud, because it only takes about zero to seven days. Listen. That's the opposite of Sierra's prayer. Okay, and it works. You think Sierra's fucking prayer worked. This prayer, this prayer, this God he beat angwing those prayers on the on fuckation.
00:20:39
Speaker 4: And let me tell you it's not just for niggas, because we did this shit in our business. Literally, we did this shit in our business and it happened the next day. I did not realize that we did do this in our business.
00:20:51
Speaker 2: We talked about this last week literally, we said, if it's not meant to be, remove it. Literally the next morning, poopoop I was like, okay, well, God said, so it's true. It's just in general, like when you really asked whoever you believe in, God, the universe, whatever, Buddha, when you ask spirit to remove something that really is not conducive to whatever your goal is or your purpose and you say, please remove it. Maybe you better believe it's gonna remove it. And but you have to say the part make it so clear that I can't ignore it if I tried.
00:21:25
Speaker 4: And then the other side of that is when you don't listen and then you continue on. Just be prepared for shit to go even worse because you went against God, bitch, you went against.
00:21:35
Speaker 2: Your own ass. You went against God, you went against yourself, and you know better. You know better. One time that I got the shit slap out of me after I went against my own prayer, literally and I had to tell Erica I got slacked. I remember that long drive to go pick up those sweatsuits. Was that what it was se going. I got in the car, She's like, are you okay? And I was like, no, it's not funny.
00:22:02
Speaker 5: I'm sorry.
00:22:02
Speaker 2: I shouldn't be laughing atastic violence. It was funny because my dumb ass brought ass for it and I stayed, and that's what I got. God said, oh, we bitch, you want to play. I'm an ike bitch. I mean I did the same ship. I did the same ship. So and then she got a there was a baby. So just just know that when you do that prayer. It is going to come hard, It's going to come clear. Yeah, not wishing that on you, my dear Facebook friend. I'm just saying, stop playing, stop playing.
00:22:32
Speaker 4: Stop playing with fire, because even fuck around and have another baby with that nigga rum, you know.
00:22:52
Speaker 2: Speaking and playing with fire and letting shit go. You know, we're in the year of twenty twenty five. There's a lot of changes happening right now, including this bitch ass inauguration.
00:23:02
Speaker 5: Oh Lord Jesus.
00:23:04
Speaker 2: And I've been honest, I'm gonna be honest. I've been actively avoiding it mentally because it's the only way that I can keep saying. Because about six months ago, I told Erica that we needed to be out of the country by the twenty fifth, and she obviously ignored me because we were basically, well, we're gonna be out of the country like three days later, but our kids are not good mom's bad choices. What can somebody send the kids? I watched way too many movies about the world ending and about now and be apocalypses and bad things, and so my anxiety can be at an all time high. So I have I have to put on my blinders. But how are you dealing in this time disassociation the name. You know, I during the time, I was, you know, when it all, when it all went down, I knew Kamala was not gonna win.
00:24:00
Speaker 4: You know, I know everyone's rallying for this black woman, but if a white woman couldn't win, I didn't have no faith in a black woman winning this election.
00:24:07
Speaker 2: So I was not surprised.
00:24:10
Speaker 5: I guess what I was surprised. I can't even say I'm surprised.
00:24:13
Speaker 4: I guess my anger was like reactivated for some of the people in my life, especially just knowing me, knowing us, knowing the world, taking like I don't know, taking care of our children at times, our friends, just being in circle with us.
00:24:31
Speaker 2: It just made me really realize how much we are in such.
00:24:34
Speaker 4: An individualistic society that and I don't know how we go back to being in community in that way. People vote for their own interests, they don't vote for the greater good, and this has been a true example of that. Also, me being Latina and watching my Latina and Latino people vote read every year, which I've never shocked by everyone.
00:24:59
Speaker 5: There are a lot of people.
00:25:00
Speaker 2: Can you believe the Latin vote was blah? Blah blah.
00:25:03
Speaker 4: I'm like, of course it was, it's not every fucking time because they're voting for one particular topic and it's like the topic religion, Okay, yeah, religion and abortion, and no, it's like like the god thing.
00:25:18
Speaker 2: It's the God thing.
00:25:19
Speaker 4: And also a lot of I feel like a lot of I don't want to say a lot, but the majority of Latin people in this country, I feel like, have been so whitewashed and they want to assimilate so badly. They don't want to be looked at as those people. They're not the people on the border, those are not them.
00:25:36
Speaker 2: Well, a lot of people have fought and fought to be here and be equal.
00:25:39
Speaker 4: So yeah, and they're not like them, even though they're whatever. Maybe their ancestors were like them, or maybe their grandparents were like them, but now they've they've made it, they made it through and so they're not like that anymore. Or they're so far removed from the passage over here that they can't relate to that experience anymore. And so they and because they're they're assimilation to whiteness is so severe.
00:26:02
Speaker 2: I mean, that's every every minority, because that's how it's by design.
00:26:05
Speaker 5: I wouldn't say that's every minority.
00:26:07
Speaker 2: That's like, there's a lot of there's a lot of Uncle Tom blacks, and I mean, I think.
00:26:12
Speaker 4: I think, but even in this election, they wanted you to think that, and most of the black people didn't vote for vote Republican, even though they wanted you to believe that that was what was happening. So I don't I don't agree with that. I do agree though, that a lot of Latin people I think, have been hit even more because we are part, we are of the Americas, Africa, Africa. Obviously, like we were shipped here Mexican people, this is we were on this land, this was our land, and so I think the assimilation actually impacted us the most here because this is our land and it was literally taken from us here, we were brought from.
00:26:47
Speaker 2: I would, I would, I would disagree only be I mean, I just feel like in general, when you live in a world globally that is euro cent, like euro European centered in every capacity in media and beauty and everything like, that is by design that you want to assimilate. You want to feel like, you know, like my credit's high, or I'm you know, you walk into a building. You don't you want to be associated with that for survival essentially, And I think for Black people, yes, we were brought over here and it's not necessarily the same land mass, but I do feel like that's even more reason because most African Americans have no direct connection to Africa except that we know that via slavery. What they told is via history books.
00:27:27
Speaker 4: But just imagine your culture being taken from you on the land that your cure was creating.
00:27:32
Speaker 2: But for Latino people, it hasn't been taken from them. They have their music, they have they have their food.
00:27:37
Speaker 4: I'm not I'm not I'm not I'm black. I'm not debating about that. I'm just speaking for Latin people. I'm speaking for Latin people that have Like it's so interesting because during you know, during this time, I went on this field trip with Iri. She's learning about the missions and you know, we went to Solving. I don't know if anyone is familiar with Solving, but it's where a lot of the missions are Santa Barbara, San Diego, and you know, they're teaching my daughter about these missions and they wanted us to come on the field trip. But I'm so glad that I went, because of course they're whitewashing everything and they're skipping over a bunch of shit because they don't want to like traumatize the kids. And I'm sitting there pissed, and I's like, what's wrong, Mom, And I'm like they're all lying, and like some of them parents are like yeah they are, and then.
00:28:16
Speaker 2: All the other, you know, the other parents like la la la, la la.
00:28:19
Speaker 4: But when I was sitting there listening to like just revisiting what has been done and for me as a Latina and watching my Mexican, the Mexican side of my family completely assimilate to this side.
00:28:35
Speaker 5: My grandmother doesn't like to be viewed as a certain time.
00:28:39
Speaker 2: I think also with that is you they can black people, you can't. You can't assimilate visually.
00:28:45
Speaker 5: My grandmother can't assimilate as a white person.
00:28:47
Speaker 2: She could like she's she's fair skin. She says, she god have dark brown hair, like a black person doesn't have the option. So that's true, but certain Latin people can't assimilate either. It goes both ways. It goes both ways.
00:28:58
Speaker 4: And I'm just saying that because the culture literally was robbed from us, they were told this is wrong, this is right, this is savage. Yes, that exact thing happened to Black people, but it's different when it's on your land. So I feel like the assimilation was more severe here. And that's why a lot of Latin people they don't like to be part of that. They don't like to be part of that group, and so they're more inclined to vote for these said reasons of religion, the religion that they.
00:29:28
Speaker 2: Were given that they hold on so dearly too, because it was literally shoved.
00:29:32
Speaker 4: Down their throat, and so this is literally so ingrained in them, deeply, ingrained even more, I would say than Black people, because Black people don't vote necessarily for religious purposes. They didn't vote Republican because they wanted to vote because they're anti abortion. Maybe some people did, but for the most part, the Latin people that voted, that was like the biggest reason religious base.
00:29:52
Speaker 2: I think Black people have historically always been democratic, period.
00:29:55
Speaker 4: But I'm just saying Latin people generally vote for religious purposes. And you think about how that was one of the biggest ways that they pilgrimized that culture, this culture Latin.
00:30:10
Speaker 5: People, it was through religion, and so they're voting for that.
00:30:13
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying, Well, I understand like there's very it's very heavily catholic, like you know, like abortions or no, no, there's certain things I think also like for us, it's like going back to the initial conversation about like having realizations about people in our friends circle or people that we you know, you feel close to, and then you realize you pull back the curtain and you're like, oh, you voted for this. I think like a for anybody just joining the show or listening, or who just doesn't know, who don't know. Eric and I live Not only do we live in la we live in the valley. We grew up in the valley. It is predominantly white, you know what I mean. So I think that I wasn't really a lot. I wasn't very shocked to see some of our friends voting a certain way. But maybe because I'm so, I'm conditioned to there's a part of me to understand that some of my friends are just never going to understand, you know what I mean. Like there's a part of me like we can all it's all it's all fun in games until some real shit happens because for us, like for them, it's like it's political, like everybody's racist. But for me, it's like if this person promotes and encourages these racist whites to uproar and like to feel comfortable and their racism, it incites a different type of violence where if you're not if you're not subscribed to it, or you're not a target of it, you could just like pass it off as just like it's just everybody is like that, you know what I mean. Like when I talk to my friends, which I'll be honest, I don't get really deep because I know I'm gonna probably stop fucking with you. I know you're not educated enough, You're not gonna understand. You don't have my experience, and you obviously like your level of understanding for what that like, what that means for me, like just the energy of the world is not going to be the same. And so intentionally I realized that, like back in twenty twenty, I'm like, I'm just going to cut the conversation here or else I'm not gonna like you for real, for real, And because I just don't want to even go through that or like have to be like I'm blocking you or I'm not being friends with you because you've voted this. I'm just not going to have those conversations. But I know like that our experience is so different that I don't really expect you to get it, and.
00:32:17
Speaker 4: I'm not even I think I was more so appalled because a lot of the things, because so much has happened over the last eight years, and also like so many of our rights as women have been taken away, like roal versus way, Like so many of those rights have been taken away that I would think that those things at least.
00:32:36
Speaker 2: Would perhaps change their perspective do it.
00:32:39
Speaker 4: Like I know that there's certain things that they're voting for, because like I said, we're living in this individualistic society, but like as women, I thought, and as women, and as the person that you're voting in, like knowing his track record, it's just like common like that's what like kind of that's not kind of That's what grossed me out about the people that I know that we like, that we know and like you.
00:33:05
Speaker 2: Know, some of them got I know they were mad at me. One of them is like I'm coming to pick up my daughters or my son's jackets.
00:33:11
Speaker 4: From her house and I'm like, okay, bitch, I don't That's fine, I don't.
00:33:15
Speaker 2: I don't hate you. I just don't guess what the jacket picked up. Absolutely, it was immediately. It was immediately after I unfollowed her.
00:33:22
Speaker 4: Oh, I think that I just a I followed her because she was posting shit, and I was like, I don't want to see the ship. I followed two people and I was like, I don't want to see your shit. It's not that I hate you, It's just that I don't think.
00:33:36
Speaker 5: I don't.
00:33:37
Speaker 4: We don't have anything that we actually relate on. Yes, you're Are you a terrible person? No, I don't think you're a teleproper person. Are you a danger to my child?
00:33:45
Speaker 1: I don't know.
00:33:45
Speaker 2: If the world were ending, like what kind of I just feel like.
00:33:53
Speaker 4: This election really highlighted just how much we differ in the values of the human race and society and us as women, and I do believe that for me, I have a lot of integrity about the people that I keep close to me. I am I'm a fucking territorial bitch when it comes to my friends. I don't just I'm not friends with everybody, you know, and like if we don't agree on certain things or we can't see eye to eye on certain things, and you're gonna also hide that's what That's another thing that I don't like is that people like kind of like avoid the conversation or just don't say anything, Like if you're gonna be about it, then just be about it, then say it. Just be about it, you know. I feel like a lot of people were so scared to like just say this is why I'm voting, this is this is why I'm voting for.
00:34:44
Speaker 2: This first thing, until until it until you came into office, until I I just really feel like, honestly, a part of me feels like, are you dumb? This is someone who is like he to me, he's a joke. Like everything I co out of this man's mouth is a lie, is a joke. And it's not even very well hidden, like he's there's no like he's he's like, I'm there's no problem, I'm not doing product twenty twenty six, twenty twenty five. It's like this nigg is lying. He lied about getting shot. He lied. He just lies. He's grabbing bitches by the kouchy. He's a felon. So if this is not enough to say I'm cool off this, nigga, you're kind of slow, so then why keep those people in your life. I don't feel like I have to have deep conversations about people's political beliefs, because I honestly don't even think that a lot of the people that we're talking about specifically are even educated enough to even defend themselves in a conversation. I think the things that they would be talking about would be regurgitated information from the Internet, and I don't think and I think with this my things would go over their head and a lot of those people, I mean not I don't know if you're talking about the same two people, but I don't. I don't have deep conversations with anyway. It's it's very surface, it's very how are you, it's very let's let the kids play, so on those terms. Sure, I don't mind that our kid our friend, our kids are our kids are friends. They're not talking about political things. If things come up, I'm glad to have a conversation. I know myself, and I just feel like i'd rather keep it surface. And I'm okay with that because I'm not here to necessarily be your best friend and go on trips together and do certain things like I know where each person in my life sits, stands and sits, and I'm okay with that. I don't have to like remove you in order to understand that we have different goal like views that way. I'm black, and especially as a black woman growing up in this environment where most of my friends haven't had the same experience as me, I've come to the place where i'm I know where everybody sits in my circle. I think I just I'm only interested in in like integrity based friendships.
00:36:56
Speaker 4: I don't care to even have small talk. I don't care to drop my kid off at your house just because I need a break because whatever that I've known you for, however.
00:37:06
Speaker 2: I don't know how to drop my kid off anywhere and if they want to play. But like we see you in passing, see a birthday party.
00:37:10
Speaker 5: I'm just speaking for myself.
00:37:12
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm just and a lot of people, like I said, I grew up here. A lot of my friends that I've known twenty twenty five years. I there's nothing I can tell you that's going to make you understand being black in America. And I know you don't get it, so it would be a waste of my time and energy and breath to even attempt to start that conversation.
00:37:31
Speaker 4: But it's not even just being black at this point, it's about being a woman. At this point, you're voting against my rights as a woman. And then I understand that when you.
00:37:40
Speaker 5: Need to fuck.
00:37:41
Speaker 2: I understand people being confused. Also, he also said in Milania, whatever his wife said, she doesn't believe in the government having having anything in her and in the terms of her body. And so that's confusing. If if a nigga is telling you, I'm not gonna do this, I'm not going to do that, but someone else is saying something else, niggas are confused.
00:37:59
Speaker 4: But he doesn't look at it. Look at the actions they overturned Roe versus Wad under his term he was.
00:38:06
Speaker 2: That wasn't when he was there. Yes, it was when truck was in office. Yes, that wasn't during That wasn't during Biden's term. That was recently. That was four years ago. That was almost four years ago. Has it been four years yes? And thin it was. That was per state, So federally is one thing. Per state is different. So I think that within the state, a lot of these backwards ass states did that, and he was basically saying that federally, he's not going to be in women's birth business. Obviously, there's a lot of lies that are being generated from the entire political parties. Honestly, the thing about me is, I'm not a government type of bitch. I'm a black person and I don't believe in any like American government is fuck to me as an African American person, I believe. I know people keep saying this like the greater of two evils. America's evil as fuck. It always has been. It's not a secret. So I don't subscribe to either side just because I know they're both full of shit, and it's both. It's both for profit and monetary gain. It's not for the ethics or morals of the people that they contain. So with accepting that, it's like, I live here and let's just keep it moving until I can get to Costa Rica permanently forever. I want to know. I just for me, it's no new friends.
00:39:18
Speaker 4: I got my friends, if you I mean, obviously, the tribe is always the tribe. But when it comes oh my god, actually there's a bitch in our who used to be in our tribe that.
00:39:30
Speaker 2: She blocked us on everything. Oh yeah, because we talked about Palestine, and I'm like, wow, interesting. It's so it's such an interesting, fickle time, and you know it's so telling too that like the thing about it is like people get in.
00:39:46
Speaker 4: This is the thing and I'm guilty of this too, is like we get in an uproar around around these topics, right, and we get mad at our friends, and we get mad at the people that we deem as whatever friends, acquaintances, and then time fizzles out and then we're back to going to brunch and then we're back to you know, having play dates.
00:40:04
Speaker 2: And it's like, did you go to brunch with any of those people?
00:40:06
Speaker 4: I'm not talking about them specifically, I'm just saying in general, all of us like this, this is what happens. We get it, We have this like outrage, and then we go back to just whatever it feels normal again.
00:40:19
Speaker 2: I think there was a turning point in my relationships where I was like over different as like as an adult, and I've kept those people in those places. Maybe we would have contact with me. But am I calling you every day?
00:40:31
Speaker 1: No?
00:40:31
Speaker 2: Am I keeping up with my life. No, I like, as an adult as i've especially as a black woman growing up in the valley, in certain situations, I was just like, oh, okay, this is where I'll leave you forever. Twelve degrees. You know, there's some people who are two degrees or some people who are across the mountain around the corner, and I just know how to jeeal in those those distances and not like take it very personally because then it's going to piss me the fuck off, and then I might have to punch you in the face. And I don't want to punch somebody in the face. Late in life, I could be getting in a fight at thirty six years old. Can you imagine if I called you so I got a fits fight, girl, come give me. I had to be her ass, I could imagine. Actually, I'm surprised I ain't got one of those calls yet. Shut up, now, you trying to make me the violent friend, not me thinking about it.
00:41:18
Speaker 1: I know.
00:41:19
Speaker 2: Yeah, when was your last physical altercation? Probably like when I live in Atlanta, I can think of two physical altercations as an adult, Like once outside the club, this bitch that was talking shit about me, and I saw her in the club and I could not let it go. I had to say something. And I was like, what was that you said to so and so? And she said we saw each other outside the club and we got into a physical leducation. And then one time I didn't I didn't really participate in it, but I was talking shit because I have a really my gift is talking shit with like a very straight face, with like a smile on my face. And I really pissed some got my gift. I was just like jokingly but like getting under this person's skin. And I was just talking sitting on the bed. It was really late with a bunch of people, and she jumped across the bed to attack me. But that was it. That was about fifteen years ago, What about you.
00:42:15
Speaker 4: My last one was about eleven years ago at Casa Vega eleven.
00:42:22
Speaker 2: That's not about actually wait no, it's not. Costaviga was another Oh MEXICALI, oh right here, Ventre. Yeah, shout out to MEXICALI down why.
00:42:30
Speaker 1: It was.
00:42:30
Speaker 2: It was very uncalled for.
00:42:31
Speaker 4: Actually we were all there was a long it was single to mile. There was a very long ass fucket yeah, tequila.
00:42:37
Speaker 2: There was Keep in mind these physical altercations removed by domestic violent situations because that would have been more recent for me.
00:42:43
Speaker 4: There, yeah, there was uh oh yeah because second name one of those two, because.
00:42:48
Speaker 5: That would be last year.
00:42:50
Speaker 2: Oh sure, yeah for me. No wait, there was a long ass line.
00:42:55
Speaker 4: We were all waiting to pee and this bitch was in there for a fucking ever and I was next up and I was knocking, like hello, bitch. She opened the doors swinging. No way, Yeah, she opened the door, she fears lf. No, she opened the door because she was mad. I was knocking trying to get in because bitch took Lois in there. I don't know if she was doing some fucking cocaine or what the fuck she was doing, but she was taking too goddamn long and I had to pee and there was a long ass line and everyone was like what the fuck.
00:43:21
Speaker 5: So she came out swinging and we started fighting and they had to break it.
00:43:24
Speaker 2: Up and then that was it.
00:43:25
Speaker 4: But that was that was my last physical altercation. I don't like to fight because I'm like my face, I like it. I don't want to get my face hit. I don't want to get scratched and I might black out.
00:43:35
Speaker 2: I don't I don't.
00:43:35
Speaker 4: I don't trust myself in that situation. I haven't fought a lot of bitches in my life. I fought more niggas in my life and the bitches.
00:43:44
Speaker 2: Yeah, No, I just don't believe in getting in a fight at this grown age, now, will I? I'm very much have two parents from Philly. Absolutely, I'll fucking fight you if need be. But I don't think it's classy as a fucking grown ass adult, and it's not my go to. However, there are a couple of things spinning in my face. Certain words. Yeah, I'll beat your fucking ass and it's gonna be go time, and I might pull a knife or something. But other than that, you got a knife, No, but I would break a glass and make it a shank. I don't know. I've seen movies Flash Bleach. You know, I'm ninety eight pounds. I gotta do what I gotta do. Weapons all around can be weapons.
00:44:18
Speaker 5: You know, there's the key with the key between the fingers.
00:44:20
Speaker 2: Listen, I'll bite all the things. I just would recommend you get in a fight with a little person because I'll go love not like Michelle obomb Michello, bombshell bomb Anyway, it feels like a good time to segment into secrets Safe. Is your secret safe that I might beat somebody's ass with a shank?
00:44:46
Speaker 1: Uh?
00:44:46
Speaker 4: So this segment secret Safe is for you to write in and share your secrets with us anonymously.
00:44:54
Speaker 2: We know how to keep a secret. So if you are interested or.
00:44:57
Speaker 5: Have something you want to share.
00:44:58
Speaker 4: Maybe you can't tell the homies, maybe you can't even bear to tell yourself, tell us.
00:45:04
Speaker 5: Go ahead and click the link in this episode description, or you can.
00:45:06
Speaker 2: Just go to Good Momsbad Choices dot com and tell us your secrets. We won't say your name if you don't want us.
00:45:12
Speaker 5: Tom, So, this was a write in question, a write in secret?
00:45:17
Speaker 2: Excuse me? Okay, please don't judge. Is this has been hard enough already?
00:45:23
Speaker 4: I just found out the guy I've been dating for the last five months has a whole other secret life with a wife and two kids. He doesn't know that I know, and I haven't told his wife yet. Of course, I'm not going to keep dating him, but I'm torn on whether or not I should tell his wife. I'm a little fearful of his retaliation, so I really don't.
00:45:40
Speaker 2: Know what to do.
00:45:42
Speaker 5: What would you do.
00:45:44
Speaker 2: A I just really want to know, like how motherfucking spy wear all these niggas Because me, as a woman, my intuition is so high. I ask so many questions, where do you live? All the things, so many questions. I don't know if this could pass me, Like maybe it was long distance. Oh, I mean even then nigga facetimey bitch. Yeah. This reminds with an episode he once had I'm triggered, I'm dating a married man, where Erica was stating a married man long distance because because niggas are strange, and they kind of did research because we tell all our business on the internet, and he knew exactly what to do and say. He did and he and he was facetiming, and he was facetiming me. He was face timing me with his son, his son like saying hi, yeah, Yes. He was flying out like he driving out to our show, like he was doing a lot.
00:46:43
Speaker 1: What was that?
00:46:43
Speaker 2: Twenty nineteen of twenty nineteen, Please, if you guys have not dipped back in the archives, it is worth dipping back in the archives to listen to I'm Dating a married man. It is my my dear, dear, my best friend, my brother, shout out to Sebastian.
00:47:00
Speaker 4: He really coached me through this very dark time in my life. And when as far as just like any good.
00:47:06
Speaker 5: Gay man would do, he wrote a letter to the wife for me.
00:47:11
Speaker 2: So you know, did you have done that? Had he not done it for you, would you have contacted her in any way? Or would just let it go? I would have contacted her. I mean I did. I threw him, you know, like that was my choice. I mean he didn't. He didn't do it on his own accord. I mean, I don't know sebas should be doing.
00:47:33
Speaker 4: I think that you know, and and and granted did it change the situation. No, the bitch was got pregnant and the probably.
00:47:39
Speaker 2: Still forgot She got pregnant right after that and had a baby with him.
00:47:43
Speaker 4: And you know, I think sometimes women go like double down even more when that happens.
00:47:48
Speaker 2: That's never, which is never a good look like ever, It's just never.
00:47:53
Speaker 4: But I don't know, like I think that as from a woman to woman, I leave that she deserves to know. But do not be surprised if nothing changes you. You really need to wash your hands with this completely, like you said you are. I hope you have, But I would want to know.
00:48:13
Speaker 2: And I'm gonna tell you just on the just on the karma in general. Whatever you choose to do with this information.
00:48:18
Speaker 4: Is on you.
00:48:19
Speaker 2: But I'm gonna let you know, bitch, this is what your nigga's doing. But yeah, I do. If I if it was happening to me, I would want to know. I don't even know how my husband could ever think he was having upside bitch because I'm a nosy bitch on both sides. Yeah, laugh, because it's never happening. It would never happen because I am too nosy. I'm all up in your phone, I'm all up in your whereabouts, and I asked too many questions. But I do know that they're sneaky double live leading men because I even met that guy. I met that guy who was she met to the podcast. She was talking to him for a while. He was sending stuff, being kind, all types of shit. They were really dating. He took us to dinner, he came out to dinner. Was it? Who was I with? Ashley? Oh? Okay. But for the men who are listening and the men who do shit like this, what the fuck is the point? What are you doing? And if you're grown like to me, if you're a late in life cheater, like an old ass nigga that cheats, I don't think they're late in life. I think they've been doing this. I just feel like your I just feel your whole life's a lie and that's on you, Like I don't. I think this even goes to your ex. Like there's a couple of people I could think of specifically who go so hard to to present as one thing and then when you find out you're not. You know what I think also for us as podcasters. For us as podcasters, we talk so honestly all the time, even the things that are not so desirable. You know, like I'm gonna say some shit even if I know it's going to make a nigga judge me, but I'm still gonna say it because it's the truth. So if somebody goes so far to hide who they are, it makes me know that you don't really like yourself or what you represent, and you hate it so much that you'd create a whole facade over who it is. So it's always just like, damn, I feel bad for you because you really dislike yourself and you don't have any self love and that's something even deeper that you have to go on the journey into. And I have no time for it and no guidance, but it does make me feel like, damn, what a sad life to live. Long story short, bitch, Tell her, yeah, tell her and make sure she gets the message. Yeah, like email her directly, like Sebastian did. Yeah. As a matter of fact, can we play that clip? Yeah? I think Orlando. Can we insert Yeah? I think we need to insert the clip.
00:50:35
Speaker 4: We need to insert the clip of Sebastian reading the message to Kishan Khan.
00:50:40
Speaker 2: That was his name. Oh Sean, I should have known. God, his voice bothered me. Yeah, beautiful. Before we before we let go of this topic, let me talking about Kishan. It was around Halloween time and he told Erica that he was dressing up as Martin. Shut up, and I said, girl, you know good and god damn, well, no one's dressing up as Martin without Gina. You knew he was married, because how the fuck you just gonna be Martin? What's she gonna wear? You have to have Gina. And sure enough, well we finally got into this, got into the files. There was a picture of him because no one's gonna be just fucking Keishawn as Martin. No one's gonna know who you are. The fact that we say his government name, that's what the fuck? You get? What the fun I should say your last name? What was it? The b damn? All her friends are gonna know he's where was he?
00:51:34
Speaker 5: North Carolina?
00:51:35
Speaker 2: Always get the Carolina, one of the Carolinas. There's bored as states where you've got nothing to do. No, sorry, I didn't mean to say that. There's a lot of stuff to do there. It's just him, lots of things to do. You go with your state statism. Sorry, guys, Oh we didn't pull a card? Or is it terrible? Or did we not smoke a joint?
00:51:57
Speaker 4: Okay, well hold on, oh speaking of this joint, I didn't get to tell you last episode.
00:52:03
Speaker 5: This is a very very special strain.
00:52:07
Speaker 2: You did start with saying that, and then you never never shared why why. This comes straight from my parents' backyard, actually not the backyard, my brother's bedroom where my stepfather was cultivating cannabis because my brother went to college, so he made I don't think you should tell their business.
00:52:25
Speaker 5: But okay, that's fine, schol we're in fororing we're in Cali for.
00:52:31
Speaker 2: Anyway.
00:52:31
Speaker 4: Fine, anyway, he grew this. It took about a thousand years, and that does not take two months. It took forever because he takes forever, and this is forever does He's slow. He's slow. I love him dearly, but everything he does is slow. He cooks slow, he talks slow, he thinks slow.
00:52:50
Speaker 2: And he's a great man. And the cannabis. But you know what I will say, when people take their time, they make good product. I do, and the product is is good product. Taking the shout out to Rory smells good. I don't know what strain this is. It's so it feels like a hybrid. Actually, no, this seems like a og. Basically that all the weed people tell me that everything's a hybrid. Don't get it twisted, which I could see all contaminating each other. Okay, yeah, I've been wheezing lately. Probably I mean me too, probably because we've probably at some point you need to stop smoking weed.
00:53:36
Speaker 5: But no, I think it's allergies.
00:53:39
Speaker 2: Okay, couldn't be weed. Nope, it's allergies.
00:53:45
Speaker 4: Let me just take a moment to cleanse the palate after all the shit talking we did a little palette.
00:53:51
Speaker 2: Cleanser wherever you are, just take a few deep breaths, sounds, remove the tension from your body. That's nice what you do with wheed. Oh yeah, using weed with the breath work is actually a clutch.
00:54:28
Speaker 1: Too.
00:54:29
Speaker 2: Can do weed and breath work together in Costa Rica with me and Jamila February first through the sixth in Costa Rica near the Black Sand beaches. That's strong on the Caribbean side, yuess.
00:54:43
Speaker 1: It is.
00:54:45
Speaker 2: For those of you who smoke cannabis.
00:54:47
Speaker 5: It's also available.
00:54:48
Speaker 4: I know people always ask me, can we smoke weed? I'm in Costa Rica, yes, and but in fact we will provide it for you.
00:54:55
Speaker 2: Don't you worry. You've got everything, everything you need, You've took it, taken care of it. Breathing for you. Pick a card, my love. King of Pentacles, hmmm, the King of Pentacles. That's the King of the Money.
00:55:15
Speaker 4: He looks like he's he's really proud of himself, like he's he's accomplished things.
00:55:20
Speaker 5: He looks like fairness and show the camera luxury.
00:55:25
Speaker 2: He stands for wealth, business, leadership, security, discipline, and abundance. The King of Pentacles represents material wealth, financial abundance and worldly success. This king is a faithful provider. He uses his ambition and confidence to create wealth for himself and others, and generates his self worth from what he has accumulated and can share with others. He is also a fatherly figure who provides others with advice, guidance, wisdom, especially in financial and work related matters. When the King of Pentacles appears in a terror reading, you are confident and successful at attracting and managing wealth. Not only do you identify opportunities for growth and success, but you also draw upon your self discipline and control to manage your wealth and invest in wisely for the long term. Hmm my four hundred million dollars. The King of Pentacles indicates that you can translate your vision into something tangible, practical, and often very lucrative. You are the ultimate business owner. Amen, Amen, Amen, Yes, yes, I'll take that. Twenty twenty five. We've gotten some good cards this last two weeks. You standing on business, stand on business. Did y'all see our trailer because we stand on BABS trailer. You saw it right and now you saw it. You liked it, didn't you? You did it? You saw it we're bossy, right. We've she was acting, saw her acting debut. She was not our acting debut. We've been acted so many times, bitch, We've had a two women show. It's not acting, it's real life, but it is entertaining. Yeah. I think we were talking about before we start this episode that a lot of times, at a certain age, people people cap their passions and their creativity and the things that they can tap into. And I just want to say, because sometimes I fall victim to this too, Because society, you could be a late in life whatever you want to be, except a bad person, that would be a waste of time. But like, if you want to act late in life, like even the guy both Well, one of the gentlemen who was in our art. Wait, we got to stop calling it late in life. You know where that came from. I know where it comes from, the late life lesbian. One time somebody wrote us in and they were like, I'm a late in life lesbian lesbian, and ever since then we've been like late in life, porn style, late in life, Peter, everything's late in life. Shout out to that girl. I wonder if she's still lesbian. Oh my god, I hope she is I just live in her truth, or maybe you fall out of lesbianism like me. Maybe she seemed like she was really she really needed to go in there for a while. Can you relate this for me? Absolutely? I know, But I just feel like sometimes later in the latter years, people have a lot of fear about starting something new because there's this expectation that you have to be wildly successful or make a lot of money. And I think it's ridiculous, and I have experienced this, like this year I forgot I mean, I started a podcast with Orlando called Love Like This. Go listen to it. But I had a lot of anxiety around it, even though obviously I know I already podcast, but I only do it with Erica, and it's so I'm used to doing with Erica. And it was very it was very telling for me that I had so much fear around it and like anxiety, and I was like, Pitch, you didn't have fear where you were sitting in the dining room with Erica, and I just had to like do it. And it took some time to feel like, to realize that. And it's just like even with my sexology and my tantric practitionership is like even with writing a book, you know, it's just like we tell ourselves so many lies and it really handicaps us from like expanding and doing other things and literally having fun doing it and like discovering parts of ourselves that we haven't honored. And so I just want to say, if you're late in life anything, do it. I agreed.
00:59:12
Speaker 4: I've been really thinking about that a lot lately too, because I've recently got back into acting, and you know, acting kind of like broke my heart for a while because I've been auditioning and acting for the majority of my life. And actually it's so crazy now that I'm getting back into it, because it feels like I was.
00:59:32
Speaker 5: Like, oh my god, that was a whole lifetime of.
00:59:35
Speaker 4: This thing until like it started to give me so much anxiety that I needed to take a break. And I think there's also that is like not being afraid to take a break from something and thinking it's the end because you need to go focus on that late in life whatever, you know what I mean, like being able to also dissect that idea as well, because some of that is being fear of quitting your job and switching careers. Some of that is like, oh, I'm actually in the art and I'm doing things, but I actually don't want to do this anymore.
01:00:03
Speaker 2: Well I'm successful at it, like why would I stop? Or you know what, it's just also starting something at the beginning, it can be overwhelmed, it could be intimidating. And because we do have this idea socially that at a certain age you have to be an expert. But guess what, you don't have to be an expert at anything as long as you genuinely enjoy it.
01:00:26
Speaker 4: Yeah, and then you become an expert because you're going to be actively doing it, because you're really going to embody it at some point, even if at first you're just learning what it is, you know. So yeah, And I've been seeing other women kind of tap into that, Like I'm seeing some of the women that are in my life and in my circle starting to.
01:00:46
Speaker 2: Explore themselves in that way.
01:00:48
Speaker 4: And I think that is also a telling sign of like a woman that women that have agreed to.
01:00:55
Speaker 5: Have chosen to heal and know themselves.
01:00:57
Speaker 4: You start to be able to give yourself permission to even con that, you know, like sometimes the block is so.
01:01:02
Speaker 5: Deep you can't even consider you want to be what you want to sing? Bitch, what are you talking about?
01:01:08
Speaker 2: Well, the mind is such a like like the mind, like the the the energetic weight we give other people's opinions that actually, like it's an illusion, No it doesn't matter, but like the opinions of others is such a heavy energetic weight sometimes that it literally paralyzes us from the expansion that is sometimes necessary to like tap into the get to the next realm, the next level. Yeah. No, I was the other day.
01:01:37
Speaker 4: So my partner, he sings, and he's been like wanting to me to sing on songs with him, and you know, I love singing, but I don't know.
01:01:46
Speaker 2: Like again, I was like, that's done.
01:01:48
Speaker 4: I actively told myself I'm cool, Like I love music, you know, I have really great taste in music. Sound is really important to me. But I'm not that anymore. And so he was like asked me to sing. We did, and then he was like giving me notes that I can feel myself like the critique like wanting to paralyze me and even like like.
01:02:06
Speaker 2: To say not even do it.
01:02:07
Speaker 5: Yeah yeah, And I was like, huh breathe.
01:02:11
Speaker 2: Like why a you're taking it this, Like why a you're taking it personally.
01:02:13
Speaker 4: It's not that like having to walk myself through and experience like that, especially like this person loves me, like he's only he wants to be here.
01:02:23
Speaker 2: But observing that your initial reaction to those, like to certain words, even though you get, you had that, you had that moment where you get you get to choose if it means this or.
01:02:32
Speaker 4: That, but taking that pause and then but also because I'm so connected to my body, I can feel how my body like what it started to do.
01:02:40
Speaker 5: And I was like, damn, Whereas before I wouldn't even feel it. I wouldn't even know it was happening.
01:02:45
Speaker 2: I would literally just flee right Like I feel my body going into flight mode. You can identify it, and you can you can reverse I can reverse it, like I can really truly do that. Yeah, re read redirect the energy and say, hey, this is not real. Your mind just told you that. Let's redirect it here and let it. That's a really good friend. It was cool. Yeah, and I'm still working through it and I'm going to keep doing it because it was fun and I found it good being good, good.
01:03:27
Speaker 5: Hello after you.
01:03:28
Speaker 2: Took the notes willingly so funny it's true, but like you know that that's that's the perka being later on in life and being aware and intentional. It's like, am I staying in the same programming or am I taking the time to observe how I feel and like why I feel that way and how I'm showing up and then like once I figure that out, do I continue because it's comfortable, or do I then do this thing that's like I'm resisting from because I'm so used to doing this. That's how I protect myself.
01:04:02
Speaker 1: You know.
01:04:02
Speaker 4: It was even more like it's an added layer and it was probably the thing that kept me going was Irie like she came she's I realized she was witnessing me. She was there, she was in the house, and then she came in, was like, what are you doing? And she's like I want to hear and you know, it's like she's witnessing me do something she's never seen me do, and like she's never she's heard of that.
01:04:23
Speaker 2: But you get to make an example exactly, and if you flee, she'll when she something comes up for her. That's what I'm saying.
01:04:28
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's why I was like, Okay, no, this is this is actually even more important right now, it's not even about me.
01:04:33
Speaker 2: Yes it is, and it's all going to be good. Only good is going to come from this if I say yes.
01:04:40
Speaker 4: So you know it's yeah, it was interesting, it's interesting, and that's also I'm like, okay, so then.
01:04:45
Speaker 2: I have now I have to commit and how you grow out of it too? Because even Luna was talking she wants to like do Broadway. She's obsessed with Hamilton. And we went to Ashley's and we were they were like, we were waiting for you, for you guys to do karaoke, and I was like she called me. I was like, you called me about carry because she's like, yeah, you guys hear it. So I turned out was like Luna, what are you going to do it? I'm like, do something for a Hambleton. She's like, no, I'm not going to do it. And I was like, how are you going to do Broadway if you won't do the thing, And she's like and I was like, listen, you know it's like me and Erica we do shows. I'm like, I'm scared every single time. I'm nervous. I was like, but then I just have to do it. And I was like there comes au point you're gonna have to just do it. And she's just like I can see it all in her head, like she's heady because at home with us singing, dancing like vibrant, and I'm like, it's so interesting, you know, And it's like, truly we're just child versions of ourselves, because truly, I'm so nervous when we do shows, Like I'm telling Eric, I'm like, I'm so nervous, like shaking, you know, fifth time we did it that week, you know, but still it's like something you may not ever get over the nerves. But it's like, but are you going to be the bit she says, fuck it and I do it anyway? Are you going to be let it like debilitate you to not move? And then you have regrets? Yeah, I feel like I've done both. As a kid, I've frozen.
01:05:58
Speaker 4: As an adult, I've put through, I've pushed through, but felt frozen.
01:06:04
Speaker 2: The whole time and knew it was horrible.
01:06:07
Speaker 4: Have you ever known that you never had that feeling where you're like, this is going bad, but you're not going well at all, And then it's yeah, and then maybe you've even fleeed, you know, you like try to forget about that ever happening, and just like keeping and putting it away and drawer at the bottom.
01:06:28
Speaker 2: Feelings are so much got I'm so sometimes I'm over them, but I know that's no way to get over them. You gotta go in them. Yeah, I gotta run in that shit is. That's the journey. That's what else are we supposed to be doing here? We'd be bored as hell doing everything was safe. If our nervous system was regulated, we'd be fucked. If I don't, there'd be no drama. There'd be no drama, there'd be no love stories. What would be doing We'll be watching Day Along and ship right, you're right. The whole life is all about learning to understand your nervous system and learning to regulate it very much. But there's always going to be predator. There's always going to be the good, the bad, the duality of both. Yeah, oh my god, that's for another episode.
01:07:17
Speaker 4: I have a whole episode, because, bitch, we were talking about the ancestors and the oh my god, the drama of the ancestors, and like, how there's duality up there in that space, that there's duality in every is that the heaven realm. It's like in between, like because you're an ancestor not, you're not necessarily like a fucking like a master teacher. You're just up there hoping that you're hoping that your descendants are feeding you like they're thirsty up there too. There's like probably a graveyard of ancestors just underfed, and shit, no one's saying hi, giving offering anything.
01:07:53
Speaker 2: So yeah, anyway, that's that's a whole other conversation, but yes it is. Join me on an episode of Erica's Deep High Thoughts, the drama Ancestors. There's a hotel novella happening up there anyway.
01:08:12
Speaker 5: Well, this is Smaniel affirmation affirmation.
01:08:19
Speaker 2: There was one I had with.
01:08:22
Speaker 5: No new friends, just the ones that accept you.
01:08:25
Speaker 2: No new friends, just the ones I.
01:08:28
Speaker 1: Think, like you.
01:08:30
Speaker 2: Just want to think, just think just like you. I'm so high. I think it's affirmation time. You guys were high. Today's affirmation is the only fucks I have to give are the ones that serve my mind, body and soul. The only fucks I have to give are the ones that serve my mind, body and soul and soul. And so tray, Thank you, guys, for joining us today. It has been another pleasure, another pleasure. My Stepdaddy's weed got us a little toasted. It's gonna be a little slow, made me feel slow. Damn God, damn, thank you.
01:09:19
Speaker 5: Pick more from the garden.
01:09:20
Speaker 2: You know where to find us. Good Mom's Underscore Bad Choices. This is a production of the Black Effect Network and we are Erica and Mila and also follow the Good Vibe Chick Oh Yes Not Too Bye.
01:09:46
Speaker 4: Good Mom's Bad Choices is a production of the Black Effect podcast Network. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. Don't forget to subscribe to and rate our show, and you can connect with us on social media at Good Mom's Underscore Bad Choices. Make sure to subscribe to our YouTube channel at good Mom's Bad Choices to watch our episodes and join our private community on Patreon to see.
01:10:12
Speaker 2: Extended episodes, uncensored content
01:10:15
Speaker 4: And more at patreon dot com slash Good Moms Bad Choices