Jan. 29, 2025

Hoes With Hope

Hoes With Hope

Happy Humpday, Tribe! Did you tune into our amazing YouTube livestream? We hope you did! And if you missed it, no worries we got your back! This week, the Good Moms go on YouTube Live to discuss Milah’s exciting news, the harsh realities of life after TikTok, and how to balance productivity with purpose.

 

  • A Fiancée! Erica and Milah talk about Milah’s engagement and how they planned the perfect surprise 3:16
  • Bad Choice of The Week: Happy New Year, I’m divorcing my husband! 13:26
  • Surviving the TikTok Ban: Threads, Red Note, and why we’re never going back to Clubhouse 20:33
  • Chatting with the Tribe on Youtube Live: Why it's OK to cry at a sex party and balance productivity with purpose 24:50 
  • The ladies give tips on ritualizing good habits and discuss the role vulnerability plays in nurturing new friendships 40:00 
  • OUR FIRST GIVEAWAY! An update on the winner, what’s in the goodie bag, and how to enter the next contest 55:00 
  • Introducing Erica and Milah’s newest non-profit, H*es With Hope. Be charitable! Bring awareness to your local 304, call 1-800-HLP-4HOS 1:08:00

 

 

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Transcript
00:00:00
Speaker 1: Once upon a time there was a good old traditional housewife. She couldn't She cleaned and cared for her children and the man of the house, and of course she didn't talk back. She was both obeat, hint and soft by nature. She was a good woman who always made good choice.

00:00:16
Speaker 2: That ship, We're Good Mom's Bad Choices. Two single mom who said fuck the patriarchy, shared all their bad choices and found.

00:00:22
Speaker 3: Out they were so bad after all.

00:00:24
Speaker 2: We're experts. Over shares and your new besties.

00:00:26
Speaker 3: Sit back and enjoy the ride.

00:00:28
Speaker 2: I can do a bad alone mom. I can do he me Mom, Flowers.

00:00:41
Speaker 3: I can play it back powers play as we have lived. Welcome back to Good Mom's Bad Choices.

00:00:53
Speaker 2: I'm Mela and I'm Erica, and we are live on YouTube, y'all for the first time ever. We've got our shit together, and we are recording a live podcast, yes, with our online community and YouTube. So if you want to join the show and report live and get it early, then you need to come subscribe to YouTube because we're gonna do it once a month.

00:01:14
Speaker 3: Yes, we're doing it on the third week of the month. I want to say a specific day, but I don't even want to put that pressure on us because it should be changing. Let's just say it's the third day, the third week of the month. We shall be going YouTube live.

00:01:30
Speaker 2: Keep your eyes field. I am.

00:01:36
Speaker 3: We're in LA right now and I'm seeing all the people in the chat. I just want to say hello to everybody in the chat. This is so dope to see all of you guys and be able to read all of your chats live.

00:01:46
Speaker 2: This is so cool, I know. I'm like, this is this is what we've been waiting for. Feel interactive. Oh my god, Oh my goodness. Someone said, I'm so glad you guys are officially back. Don't ever leave us alone along like that again. That was a long time.

00:02:01
Speaker 3: I know, we were gone for a long time. We needed to shut the fuck up for a secondly, But now we really needed to shut the fuck up. We really needed to just go integrate all the things that we've learned over the last six years. We've shared so much with you guys, of our lives and also the lives of other people, and just learned so share so much knowledge with you. I felt like every week I didn't even get to really integrate the knowledge that was bestowed upon me by a lot of our guests and even the things that we were sharing with one another. It was just like we were onto the next, onto the next, onto the next. So it was really nice to just take a second to breathe and read, take it all in and learn and keep shit to myself and scorpial vibes and you know, not just share so much and actually go live life. So I'm excited to share a lot of what's been going on over the last nine months over the next.

00:02:56
Speaker 2: Forty eight episodes of the year. I am too. I'm excited, and I know it's like there's so much happened, so I'm sure it will layer out and reveal itself because it's a lot to catch up one.

00:03:06
Speaker 1: I know.

00:03:08
Speaker 3: So there's big news, big, major motherfucking news. I don't know if you know, but you're engaged, bitch.

00:03:19
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I know. Actually, she took my ring this morning. I'm like, where's your ring? She went to take it to resize it. It was a little bit too big. But when she was like leaving, I was like, hey, hold on, can I see it one more time? I just I'm having separation anxiety. She's like, okay, I'll get it back to you tonight, you guys.

00:03:35
Speaker 3: Jamila got engaged over the weekend. Orlando proposed to her on one eleven at eleven eleven, and it was a big It was a big plan that we had to put together. I really had to put on my acting chops to just make sure that my nosy, motherfucking friend didn't find out, which I got really scared on the day of your engagement that you found out, and I was so stressed. I was like, Orlando's gonna kill me. Heaus, I think I'm trying to like fucking sabotage and I'm not even trying to. I was trying to be a good friend and tell the people to make sure they came. Then it wasn't just a good mom's bad choices season two parties.

00:04:10
Speaker 2: I had no fucking clue, which I thought, there's no way I'm gonna be able to do. They're gonna ever be able to trick me. We lived together, Everyone's location, I'm on everybody's phone, everybody's text message.

00:04:19
Speaker 3: That's why I was worried. I was like, this picus nosy, She's gonna go through his messages. We were in notes, messaging each other and shit, not texting a note yes, which yes.

00:04:29
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was totally shocked in surprise. It was really nice. It was in our living room and with all of our friends and you know, family and food and it was just very intimate, and I was I really did think it was a good Mom season two launch party.

00:04:43
Speaker 3: I know, so the other day or like, I guess, like two weeks ago, we're sitting here working tirelessly about like trying to figure out a thousand things, and I'm like, Orlando's like Orlando was like, yeah, I'm just gonna just have a tell her that people are just like swinging by in the area and they were just gonna come by.

00:05:01
Speaker 2: And I was like, that's a horrible fucking idea. That is a man idea.

00:05:04
Speaker 3: Why the fuck would all of her friends just be in the area just swoop on by for a fucking party. I was like, how about we make it a good Mom season two party and then under the guise of that and then be an engaging party. So we're sitting in here and I'm like, Mila, I'm like, we should we should have like a little like a party for our season two and she's like okay, and he's like, yeah, we should it at your house.

00:05:27
Speaker 2: She was like, oh okay.

00:05:30
Speaker 3: I was like, okay, my Actually, I was like trying to be really casual about it. I didn't even look at her. I was just like, yeah, we should have like a season. And then I'm looking at Orlando like.

00:05:41
Speaker 2: It's working because I was like okay, and I was like, my house okay, because she knows I was gonna have a party, So I'm like okay. She's all cash like, Orlando, you're gonna cook. He's like yeah, yeah, yeah, Orlanda. He's like, yeah, yeah cook. The craziest thing is, though, Orlando is like there's only two days out of the whole year that I could ever propose. I was like my Birthday's Like. I was like, I'm I'm a mad. He's like, now I'm like New Year's and he's like, I'm like naming every special holiday in our lives. And I never once that eleven eleven or one eleven is that a specific day for you guys? No, I take he just the one's numerality for it to make sense and to be on an angel number.

00:06:14
Speaker 3: New beginnings and New Beginning.

00:06:16
Speaker 2: Yeah, So I was like I hadn't I didn't think of that at all, so I didn't even think of the date being one eleven or ever. I heard everyone's alarm going off in the house. I'm like, everybody has the same schedule. It's crazy.

00:06:28
Speaker 3: Then the day of the day of, I'm like, you want to go? Or the day before, I was like, I need to get my nails done. I want to go get our nails done together. And we are very specific nail people. We only go to like one place, but recently we stopped spending three hundred dollars every time we go and we've decided to just be basic bitches and just get regular nails. So I was like, okay, perfect, We're finally basic nail bitches. We can just go anywhere. And so I asked Mila. I was like, do you want to get your nails done? And I didn't know that Orlando had also asked her to get her nails done, which is very random and you're almost going to blow up your own motherfucker spot.

00:06:58
Speaker 2: And I was like, Orlando, everybody, I'm so popular. My wife and my husband want to get their nails done with me this week. He's like, oh, it's cool, you could just go with Erica because let me get my haircut, and I was like, okay, still thought nothing. I think, just said I'm so everyone loves me so much.

00:07:15
Speaker 3: So then I was like, okay, Orlando, I'm going to make a part of full which is like this like this app where you can invite people, and I'm going to send it to Jamila for her to share so she can invite whoever she wants. And then so I sent it to her and she's like, make me a host, and I was like, okay, I'll do it later and she's like okay, and then she.

00:07:34
Speaker 2: Asked me again. I was like, I just ignored her, not my OCD. I'm host.

00:07:38
Speaker 3: Why are you would now you want to be a hot No, no hosting. So then on the day of the engagement, because you, like I sent it.

00:07:47
Speaker 2: You wouldn't make me a host. So I couldn't see who's coming. So I had RSVP.

00:07:51
Speaker 3: She she rsvp's to her own party. I see, like Mila rsvp' and I had literally an hour before just sent out a blast from part of Fool saying, hey, guys, so this is this is not really a good Mom's Bad Choices party, this is actually Jamila's engagement, so please show up like get here before this certain time. Don't be late, don't buck this up, and don't tell her. And then like literally an hour later, RSVP Mela. I was like, why the fuck is this bitch rsvping to her own party.

00:08:20
Speaker 2: I wanted to see you know, I'm partiful. They only let you see the list if you're RSVP, so you RCPT.

00:08:25
Speaker 3: I removed you. Then you rcp'd again. I removed you again that you are CUPT again. I was like, okay, you know what, I don't know. I hope the text doesn't fucking send to her automatically, but thankfully it didn't because I was stressed.

00:08:35
Speaker 2: I literally had no idea, not even to the second I was like pouring a shot. Orlando was like, hurry up. I was like, but I haven't poured my shot yet. He's like, well, split it, and he told me and I was like huh. I was like, what the fuck is wrong with him? And then he kissed me and usually you know he still love me, dobb kissing me all the time, and then I then he got down one Nane. I was like, these tricky motherfuckers. And then I realized everybody had a video camera and her har miss fucking Nisha's nineteen ninety seven video camera. So I was genuinely surprised, and I was, yeah, I'm so happy. I feel like like like Cinderella, like a fairy tale, like single mom has ran off into the wind. I woke up the next morning like Hose with Hope. Hose with Hope. That's our new nonprofit foundation. So if anyone wants to join Hose with Hope, it just means once you're a hope, you're probably still a hope, but now there's hope because you're a dignified hope with clarity and intention, and you find your home. Man, you've healed first, You've healed first, and now you can hope for your niggas. Now you can hope for whoever you want. Yeah, you know, and just Hoose with Hope. Well, I just want to say I love you both.

00:09:45
Speaker 3: There could never be a better couple that is ready for marriage and just made for each other. Truly, I knew it from the very beginning. And yeah you can. You can never leave Orlando because I want allow it. And Orlando's never leaving you, so I don't have to worry about that because he's totally fucking obsessed.

00:10:06
Speaker 2: And I can't wait for the wedding. I know, I'm really excited. You know, Erica is the first person to tell me that I think that's your husband. And I was like giggling like a schoolgirl or in New Orleans. He's like fucking talking to me, being silly, and eric was like, I think that's your husband, and I was like, oh, yeah, maybe I think so, and he is, this is my husband, and I have like no doubt. So that feels really good too, Like there's absolutely no question in my mind that there's no one else made better for me. It's almost like ridiculously even if I thought about it.

00:10:37
Speaker 3: But you know what, I was talking to one of my former bays yesterday, Happy Babe, who was a friend now, and he was saying, oh my god, I saw like Jamie's engaged. He's like, you know, I'll never forget in Mexico on that boat, he's like Orlando, you know, he was so he held he what did he say? He was like he really like he or Jamila was so lit on that boat and he really held it together. You know, he really was like had a lot. He was very dignified. I said, no, no, no, no, no, he was proud. I was like, he didn't hold it together like he was proud. There's a difference.

00:11:16
Speaker 2: Try to hold it together, like God, I love this bitch man, I hate her.

00:11:19
Speaker 3: Jamila was basically but as naked on the boat, like I had a bikini bottom on that.

00:11:25
Speaker 2: Bikini Botby came off. At one point somebody took it off.

00:11:28
Speaker 3: You were about to just let it be though, and then someone was like, wait, hold on, maybe we should put the body asked for them to do that.

00:11:34
Speaker 2: But the point was I knew I found my husband. I was like, he'll say he can handle me, because he didn't seem he doesn't. He didn't blink and eye. It's like, that's my baby, and you really did.

00:11:42
Speaker 3: I remember early on in the Good Mom's episodes, you specifically said you wanted a man that is going to see you dancing on tables topless and say that's my baby.

00:11:53
Speaker 2: That's my bit and will there is literally I did. I did say that. I know what episode it was in, and it was don't don't show your tits around my nigga or like that.

00:12:06
Speaker 3: Oh, was that in response to an episode that we did with Yeah, it was with It was with the Sick Podcast.

00:12:12
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, oh my goodness. And I specifically said, because I said, if I'll trick you, if you if I act like conservative the first six months and then the seventh month, I'm in fucking Mexico with my tits outing. You're like, who's this bitch? So I got him in really quickly and he held himself together. Great. Actually, which is not is not? You know, I know I'm not. I'm not a traditional young lady. So wow, it's beautiful meant to be. Thank you with hope, hose with hope, with hope. I'm very happy. Good choice, bad choice.

00:12:45
Speaker 3: Speaking of bad choices, as you know, we have a segment on our show called Bad Choices of the Week. And if you haven't joined our Facebook group, it's free. Make sure you join our Facebook group. It's for the mama's, it's for the mama's. It's for the ladies only. Sorry, man, if you want, if the men's want to join, please run our Patreon when you get access to our Discord community. Shout out to any of our Discord family who's in the chat. I see Ridica, Hey girl, I saw somebody else in here. I think I saw fred Rick. Shout out to our patrons and our and our discord community. I fucking love y'all. Hey, my my, yesha too. But we share bad choices of the week on Facebook, and we have a bad choice of the.

00:13:29
Speaker 2: Week and.

00:13:32
Speaker 3: It's it's a goodie, it's a goody, gooddy giddy. So today's bad choice of the week is I've decided I'm going to tell my husband I want a divorce this year. He's whack with sexting bitches when I was seven months postpartum. We sleep in separate rooms, we don't have sex, he don't eat pussy, and literally, I ain't doing shit in couple's therapy. What the fuck? I've used the past year to really focus on myself and finding my voice.

00:13:59
Speaker 2: Thank you therapists. How do you not do shit in couple's therapy?

00:14:02
Speaker 3: And a bitch says it's time to go. I'm moving with love and zero fucks. Here's to choosing me in twenty twenty five.

00:14:10
Speaker 2: That sounds like a good choice to me. Well, yeah, I mean bad choices are a noise. Bad choices. It sounds like the only choice of my love. Yeah, how are you sleeping at separate rooms? Not fucking you're sexing other bitches and you're not doing shit in therapy. Yeah, you ain't even pussy.

00:14:24
Speaker 3: That's the that alarming.

00:14:26
Speaker 2: Let's go put that at the first, at the top. Not gonna happen, my friend, you could do better. There's plenty of niggas that are eating pussy. Yeah, Amen to that, Amen to that. Yeah.

00:14:36
Speaker 3: I feel like, you know, for those that are in LA right now, you know, there's a lot going on out here. We've been like battling wildfires and all types of shit, and you know, and I just want to say, for all people in LA that have been affected by the fires, my heart goes out to you, my love goes out to you. I've been and I've been directly impacted by the fires with my own family. I feel like everybody in LA knows someone that's been impacted. And twenty twenty five is giving like we need to start over. We need to rethink everything. We need to rethink everything in God is like I'm gonna force you, bitch.

00:15:19
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's been a trying it's been a trying, trying year.

00:15:24
Speaker 3: And it's been it's only just started, bitch, is only like we're only fifteen days in.

00:15:29
Speaker 2: I know, I'm just saying in general this, you know, the inauguration, this fucking these fires. I'm just even this last past six months. You know, there's just been a lot of ups and downs, and that is like I think we underestimate how much that affects our nervous systems. Even things that are having far away from us that we know are happening, are still deeply affecting us because you know what's happening. You know, like the energy in the world is off, and especially in la like there is it's so it's there's a lot of loss and you can feel it. Oh man.

00:16:03
Speaker 3: I just wanted to also say for the people in the chat too, if you guys have any questions, things you want to share, please make sure you drop them in the chat. We're gonna be taking a few minutes throughout the episode to answer your question. So if you have any advice, questions you want to ask, if you can have anything you want to share, drop it in the chat. But yeah, I think it's really important to take care of ourselves more than ever right now. You know, at the beginning of the year is often like this reset, but I think we say this every year, like January is never really the reset, like it always kind of comes later, and sometimes it even comes past February. Sometimes the reset happens in the motherfucking middle of the year because you're still trying to recover from like the year before, and it takes six months to even realize like, oh bitch, I'm in a whole new year.

00:16:51
Speaker 2: And sometimes and sometimes it's it's even more burdening when you're like in January first, I was supposed to change and it's fucking June, and you're like, it makes it like it's like punches you all. You're down.

00:17:02
Speaker 3: It's so much pressure. It's like so much pressure to like become this new person overnight. It's just not possible.

00:17:09
Speaker 2: It's not no.

00:17:10
Speaker 3: And like even like the woman who said she was, you know, thinking about getting a divorced, like you know, this year, Like you know, sometimes people are like leave him right now, and it's like okay, but just giving yourself peace and time and setting yourself up and not being so hasty, not being so hard on yourself. Yes, I'm like, I think me and me are both big advocates for you know, not pouring into things that don't serve you. But I also think like at this point in my life too, like I realize, like I would, I would like to have a at least if I can have a plan of action before I just hastily make decisions, because I have been very impulsive in the past, and sometimes it serves you and sometimes it doesn't. But you can have a plan of action to set yourself up and not make life more stressful for your Like, bitch.

00:18:01
Speaker 2: Do that? Yeah, I think, just not letting it take too long, you know, not getting too comfortable, but also just being gentle with yourself. It's like, you know, what do they say, pyramids won't be built up overnight. Like, just really being gentle with yourself. I think sometimes in like a season and things don't feel like progressive, or you feel like you're not making any progress, or you've made the same mistake over and over. It's like you're so harsh on yourself. And it's like in the bigger scheme of things, when you look back over a lifetime, it's like, is it even worth beating yourself up? Like it's just you're a child and you got to get back up and dosh, and that's life. There's always going to be something. It's a journey. It's never it's rarely going to be just smooth sailing. Nothing's happening in the world now, there's always something, And that's like finding the beauty in every every turn, every twist, every obstacle, and just yeah, like preparing yourself with by taking care of yourself. Even right now, I'm like thirty six, and I'm like, oh, bitch, if you want to still hang, bitch, you gotta you gotta go to the gym. When are you gonna start? I'm coming, I'm doing it. Come on, I'm doing it.

00:19:03
Speaker 3: Is that asking gonna stay lifted forever?

00:19:05
Speaker 1: Bit, I know?

00:19:06
Speaker 2: And that's the problem. And I always said that vanity would get me there, So yeah, the ass is not going to stay lifted by itself. And also I feel like I'll be a little addicted, and I think I'm gonna just invest and get the membership at the place I really want to get the membership that the classy place and just you know, like become a fitness influencer.

00:19:26
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, yeah, late in life, a late life fitness influencer.

00:19:32
Speaker 2: I'm going to be late life fitness influencer because that me Oh my god.

00:19:37
Speaker 3: On on our episode, uh, this week or last week if you're listening to if you're live right now, if you're if you're listening live, it's the episode that dropped today. If you're listening to this later, it's our third week episode. We're talking about late in life lesbian lesbians. Well, well it started off with a woman who wrote in to us and talked about how she was a late in life lesbian and Memela like could never let it go.

00:20:03
Speaker 2: Like she's like she like signed up, penned off like late live lesbian. And I was like, you know, I'm a late life whatever. So everything we do late in life like because I'm a late in life, what am I gonna be? A late life fitness?

00:20:19
Speaker 3: Remember the TikTok star on the Rise too?

00:20:21
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, TikTok. I'm also TikTok. Well now I'm not TikTok stars Rise because TikTok's about to get banned, so I'm gonna be and it's do you think it's gonna get banned? No sounds gonna buy it.

00:20:31
Speaker 3: I saw that there was some other app, some like Chinese app that was like number one on Apple and it was like literally like in Chinese like it was I couldn't even read what the fuck is said.

00:20:42
Speaker 2: Over there.

00:20:42
Speaker 3: But then there's also Isaac Kayes's son has one called fan Base that everyone keeps talking about, and it's basically like a subscription app too for content creators, but it's created by a black man. I think he's got like a lot of funding for it. I think he has like five million dollars in funding. I saw Tamika Mawori post about it today actually, and I joined, but I haven't been able to explore it yet. But I don't know what it is about, Like why we trust these like foreign apps more than we would like be quick to support a black owned app like that?

00:21:16
Speaker 2: Historically, if you've ever been on Black People Meet dot com, you know it. It's glitchy over there? What is it? Black peopleneed dot com? Black planet was lit? Was it glitch? No?

00:21:33
Speaker 3: It worked great?

00:21:34
Speaker 2: Okay, I never got to black Planet air. I'm just kidding. I think we should support our people, we support our we should support our own shit, we support our own people. I'm ten tones down with that. I do want the technology to be up to part though, so that's all that I ask. But I'll go over there, what is it called fan base. Fan base. Yeah, look, it looks like it's it looks like they're doing some stuff over there. Is TikTok isn't the same thing.

00:21:57
Speaker 3: I haven't explored it yet, but I did download it.

00:22:01
Speaker 2: Step one.

00:22:02
Speaker 3: I'm also not a technology I mean, okay, I'm not going to say that I am a technology person because I am decent at it. I just don't fully enjoy technology, specifically social media apps, and so I've been slow to add another fucking platform to my thing.

00:22:24
Speaker 2: Yeah, I never opened the new what is it? The Instagram? Twitter threads? Threads? Is that still a thing? That's just dying? I barely can get on like I used to do Twitter, and I can barely figure it out. I don't know where black Twitter is still.

00:22:37
Speaker 3: And I just I've be seeing like I'm trying to promote threads in my like in my feed, and then I click it and then I can't. So I'm like, fuck this shit.

00:22:46
Speaker 2: I'm not as far as I get too like what they say. Oh never mind. Remember the other one, Clubhouse?

00:22:52
Speaker 3: Oh my god, remember when everyone was stressing us out about getting on Clubhouse and how we were missing out on thousands and thousands and thousands of dollars, like this is the problem, Like it's all this hysteria and like people literally start freaking out about shit and focusing all their attention all obsessing over things. Literally, this is like with part like this was really stressful for me. Clubhouse in particular were clubhouse stars. Literally Clubhouse made me feel like I was not doing enough and I was already talking every week.

00:23:23
Speaker 2: You want me to talk more, but don't you remember our friends that you're missing out? Who was it?

00:23:28
Speaker 3: It was a lot of you. It was like three people specifically that I can think of. They were like, you're missing out on thousands and thousands of dollars. You're not you don't have your own club, you don't have your own room, Like you're not on their weekly like daily talking.

00:23:39
Speaker 2: I was like, I didn't understand when people were on there all day fucking talking, particularly Joe Beden. He was doing so much talking there. And do you remember there's a couple there's like five main clubhouse people who were talking so much. It made me wonder if they had any friends. Sorry, there was just like few people in there who were I would just the alert will go off every second, and I said, wow, they have no friends, people have people then had more time on them. It was that around. It was.

00:24:09
Speaker 3: It was it was pandemic times. Yeah. Yeah, people had a lot of time on their hands. So I don't I don't know. I just I never got into the clubhouse thing.

00:24:17
Speaker 2: It was it was too much for me. Anyway. Anyway, enough of the enough of the socials that we don't understand and we won't get on.

00:24:35
Speaker 3: Well, we have some people that actually have some questions for us in this social on YouTube.

00:24:39
Speaker 2: Live okay, tell the.

00:24:41
Speaker 3: Bridget are asked, are we going to do any type of tour this year? This is our tour. We're alive right now. We're live with you right now, babe, this is our tour. Welcome live from La.

00:25:00
Speaker 2: You know, you know the thing about the Tories. Imagine, imagine this picture.

00:25:07
Speaker 3: This paint the picture, babe, just let them know.

00:25:10
Speaker 2: Let me just paint the picture for your close your eyes. It's you, your best friend and your nigga, just the three of you. It's beautiful. You book your flights, you get your hotels, and then you pack about tucas four to six suitcases. Two of them are merch books, heavy ones, and then two of them are your wardrobe because guess what, babe, you're styling yourself. That means you have no Let me correct ourselves because bitches like us, we want to have two outphit changes because we're not you know who we are, We're the fucking two show, fucking blue Man group. Okay, with an outfit change. So we have. You have fourteen stage outfits that you rush to figure out what the fuck they're going to be at the last minute. You threw them in there, and you probably threw in twenty eight because just in case. These boots, stripper shoes, glitter, regular outfits, long gloves, longmestones, fish nets, lingre and we even brought props because we're two extra bitches, I'll giveaways. Okay, that's that's about three bags there, not to mention the other clothes you have to wear the other fourteen days of the tour regular sweats and shit. Okay. Then your nigga has his own small, very small carry on because that's all he will allow. And then we map out, map it out. Okay. Sometimes we're flying, sometimes we're going on stage really scared, we're drinking tequila, and then we're going to the next place that night. Or the very next morning. And sometimes we say fuckay, we don't need a plane. We're just gonna do it in a car. We're gonna drive ourselves, aka, Orlando's gonna drive you.

00:26:40
Speaker 3: Oh wait, there's a sex party in New York. Let's stop by their first. Let's add that to the thing. Yeah, come on, Oh wait, you want to pay us for the sex party? Oh sure, come on, let's do it. It's a paid gig. We gotta stay. Then, then we say we have to come up with the two hours of a show. Oh shit, Oh wait, we're stand up comedians to.

00:27:00
Speaker 2: Be Do you want to be comedian? Do you want to be commedian? Today? I am? Oh do you know how sexy dance? Because I need to get that in there? All right? Can you teach me? Do you know any strippers or subs in six different cities?

00:27:08
Speaker 3: I don't know. Let me find the stripper madam of every city and the stripper pimp.

00:27:12
Speaker 2: Guess who does that? Us? And sometimes in Orlando has to be the shipper pimp because we all had a new the work. Okay, so we've got to be a stripper pimp that do you know how many? Do you know how many instagrams.

00:27:23
Speaker 3: Wait, have you ever have you ever searched strippers New Orleans, strippers Atlanta?

00:27:32
Speaker 2: Then then shippers don't work, no mail shippers, and then that won't work, so then you have to go see dancers. So then you just go black athletic, black workout, black fitness, black Fitness, Washington, DC. Then you start following random men with muscles that have good smiles. And then you find out there is a dark web of male shippers, and like all web cities anyway, that's another thing. So in addition to that, but then certain strippers don't dance for men, so then they let me out. They're out.

00:28:00
Speaker 3: They don't they don't do any performances where men are involved, so they're they're out.

00:28:04
Speaker 2: There's a very little there's very little ones that don't show their penis. You have to tell them, don't show your penis. And then also sometimes we say we don't need a supper, we need a sub. Let's find a sub. So then you're looking at for a sub New York, calling friends, you're figuring out how to be funny for two hours. You have to remember what that funny is. What are we supposed to do? Did you have to do your own makeup.

00:28:26
Speaker 3: Do you have to find a DJ in every city?

00:28:28
Speaker 2: Yes, you have to find a DJ in every city. Okay, so that's about We've already got about fifteen things we needed to employ for for this tour. And oh and then we have to sell tickets.

00:28:37
Speaker 3: There's that part.

00:28:39
Speaker 2: We love that power tickets favorite part. Every you know, you whores, you horse.

00:28:45
Speaker 3: You told us to come to your city.

00:28:47
Speaker 2: We're friends, right, could we just curse your out for.

00:28:49
Speaker 3: You bitches, you fucking you fucking host told us to come to your city.

00:28:54
Speaker 2: And then we're like, we have let's go.

00:28:59
Speaker 3: We're like famous, and you start, They're gonna they love us, all my friends are, and our tour manager, you've only sold twelve tickets the shows in four days. Are we gonna cancel?

00:29:09
Speaker 2: Are we gonna cancel? So in addition to that, you're like, oh great, I'm gonna go on stage in my fishnets and my fucking boot all my ship being a comedian, and there's gonna be four fucking people on the stage in the audience, and I'm gonna have to do it anyway and still be funny and not cry. And then guess what, And then we say you know we're not gonna do this show because we're gonna look stupid. And then everyone says, oh my god, why are you guys cancel the show? We were coming up. I was gonna book today, my friends and all my friends, so we were all gonna fly down there to support you, you lying bitch, fucking liars. I have lied trauma issues. I have daddy issues. He lied a lot. I don't need my friends to lie to me, even though I never met so so long story short one day, but I don't know.

00:29:58
Speaker 3: We just we have a little bit of tour trauma and we love it.

00:30:03
Speaker 2: We do love it fun. I fucking love it when every time we get off stage, we're like, we're so good, that was good. Whoa, We're like all like hy bar adrenolins going, we go to the sex party and then we crash hard and then yeah, and then we make two hundred dollars because we had to pay everyone. So yeah, just do that times five and stay away from your kids for three weeks and yeah, then maybe in two years we'll go on tour. Yeah. So that's so, yes, Bridget, that's the longest, Sorry, Bridget, that was not That was not directed towards you in anyway that's been built up in us for a long time. I'm glad we got that out me too, yeah, because that was that was a lot.

00:30:44
Speaker 3: That was a lot. That was actually part of the reason after we went off, after we ended the season in March, we actually went on tour and then I was we were supposed to come back like two months later, and I told Jamila. I was like, no, I can't come back yet. We have to extend this podcast. We just the tour traumatized the fuck out of me as far as like my nervous system, the alcohol, the stress, like it was it was too much.

00:31:08
Speaker 2: And you know what, I'm generally the one who will go go go, like even if I'm dying inside, just because out of my mind doesn't get that my body's dying. And you would think that. The last time we had a great show in New York, we were going to a sex party. I was having a great time, like I was an all time high, and then just suddenly I broke down crying like I was just like malfunctioning. And I was like, was like, let's go in the other room at the sex party. Erica and Orlando are just holding me. They're like, what's these I think I'm really happy. I'm so happy. It's just a lot, you know, it's just a lot. So that was the first indication that maybe something was wrong. Yeah, we needed to take a break.

00:31:54
Speaker 3: Yeah, maybe in twenty twenty six, we'll revisit these thoughts.

00:32:01
Speaker 2: Anyway, any of the Christians.

00:32:05
Speaker 3: Anyway, we have another question, what about Oh well this is Frederic asked, how do you balance working on parts of your life and actually living working on parts of my life? I have to do both at the same time.

00:32:24
Speaker 2: I don't know, you can't. I can't.

00:32:26
Speaker 3: I can't separate the two.

00:32:27
Speaker 2: I have to live, right, It's a very hard balance.

00:32:30
Speaker 3: I mean, I guess sometimes I'm not working on parts of myself.

00:32:33
Speaker 2: This is the thing.

00:32:33
Speaker 3: I'm just kind of living and not working on shit. Yeah, And I think that's the thing. Is like giving yourself grace, giving yourself permission to just do the living and it not being perfect and you fucking up and maybe backsliding on your goals and your dreams, and then you come back, you know, and you know, hopefully having a tribe of people and community that are going to hold you accountable and be like bitch, you said you're about to do this. Where why are you doing this? So I think it's about just giving yourself the permission to kind of do both at the same time. Sometimes then also like take the fucking the crown off that you think you're supposed to wear all the time and just let it rest and live.

00:33:20
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, it's so crazy. It's like it's the same thing, but we we are the ones who compart car compartmentalize those things, and like we're like, this is what working on yourself looks like. And then you're living, but you're not doing Like so basically you're saying like you're all living and so inevitably you're working on parts of yourself, but it's not fast enough, it doesn't look perfect. You're not going to the gym on through Friday like you said, you're not, you know. And but sometimes like the living is like your hardcore about work. Your head is down. It's only work. Because last night I was working on my phone and doing a million things. Souse, I have fucking eighty d and at night I think I should deal with things, and Luna I till Una got her phone and her and Orlando did and I didn't, and I put her to bed and she was like really upset with me, and she's like you told she was like not trying to touch me, and I just like laid there with her anyway, and she finally was like she finally like came and wrapped her arms around me after she was like trying to be in fetal position, and I felt her like one teer just like roll down my shoulder, and I was like, she's like me and Orlando got up our phones and you cult being on your phone and I was like, oh my god, I'm horrible mom. But it's like sometimes you think that being you know, productive, is what you're supposed to do, but like we're only just supposed to be living in coexistence with one another, and like that is what we're supposed to be doing, you know, everything else comes like when you realize that like the most important thing is being with your loved ones, Like then you'll be healthy, then you'll like you'll check in with your body. Like those things will come in evidily because you're being present in your community in a real way. But when your head is down doing the things that sometimes we think is what we're supposed to do, be productive, be successful, then you miss out on living, and the living is exactly like our divine purpose. So it's just a word from my testimony from last night where I felt like really terrible and then then I had to check myself and be like, it's okay, you know, it's this is a learning moment, this is important, this is this is you know, like it really that one tier on my shoulder, bitch, I was like, and for a minute, I started to think, like go down a rabbit hole of all this time that I've missed, And then I was like, no, this is a way to gently just reposition and check in with how you're spending your time and what you're actually doing. And that means like when I'm putting in my body, when I'm putting the phone down, Like I knew I needed to put my phone down, but I was just so curious to see this airbnb. You know, I just couldn't stop, and I knew I couldn't stop, and I just was like the fact that she noticed it, that sit really checked the shit out of me. And I will never like I feel like that'll be one day I'll be eighty and I'm like, I remember that time you know, and like, but that is why we have to be present and live our lives.

00:36:08
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think also at this season in my life too, and it's it's been a lot, it's been a season of trying to figure this specific thing out. Is like, you know, people always talk about the work life balance and how you do it, and I don't really know if there's there's really no real answer. You can go buy the fucking download of whatever. The fuck bitch said that she mastered it. Maybe she did for herself, but everybody's different, and like it's really for me personally, like I have to there is a regimen that I have to exist in ways for me to find balance. And I've realized that, Like today, I woke up at I went to a workout class at six am. That is literally the only time I can work out. I'm not going to work out at night.

00:36:47
Speaker 2: I tried to.

00:36:47
Speaker 3: I actually worked out last night, and I was like, maybe I could do this later, maybe I could do this more often, And I was like, no, bitch, no morning morning. I have to get that out of the way. And that's my me time I wake up early, I do that, I get home. She's just waking up now my daughter sets an alarm and she's waking up on waking up herself. So it's like creating a regimen for her, creating one for me. And then like after I haven't really talked about this much yet and I haven't really even shared the video going to this cave for my birthday. I went into this like dark cave in Oregon for my birthday, in isolation and darkness for like four days, and when I came out, I just realized how much, how how I needed to have more boundaries around work in general, and just like at a certain time, I have to shut it off because I won't shut it off. I don't know how to shut it off. I am such a workhorse. And I realized I look at my mom, I look at my grandmother, I look at all the women in my life, and they're like such fucking doers and they're not even all the way happy.

00:37:51
Speaker 2: Like they're not.

00:37:53
Speaker 3: And so it's like I can see myself heading on that trajectory of just being a doer all the time, and then like like having this little space and permission for living and it's like I don't, I can't. I can't live life like that, and I think luckily, I've I've been more of a liver than a doer. I think starting Good Moms and finding my purpose in this space made activated me in that way to like, oh, now I get it.

00:38:18
Speaker 2: Now, I get when my mom is so obsessed with creating her brand. Now I love it.

00:38:23
Speaker 3: I get it, and I get why, like you know, but there is there is. I know that I've missed a lot of things with Iri, and I have a lot of regret, regret, regret, regret around it. She's expressed it to me, you know, like multiple times. And I haven't always shifted. I haven't shifted all the way quickly even now. You know, it's hard. It really is hard when you are doing something that gives you so much purpose and so much joy that does require you to be on your phone. Maybe not on Airbnb, but like be on your phone and looking at some shit, or like answering an email and saying, hold on one second, I'll I'm going to watch the movie, but let me just handle put out this fire or whatever. But it does require also for me to say like I can't, no, I can't do that right now. Sorry, sorry, person on my team. I will respond tomorrow you know, and so you know, it's you have to find what works for you, and you have to know that it's not going to be perfect. You're going to fuck it up.

00:39:26
Speaker 2: And the fund up part ext I've read something about like having a ritual. The fucked up part this is like making it a ritual makes it the habit that you that makes the thing like that makes you feel productive and the thing that you want to feel productive like that is the only way to be able to dedicate time to all of the things is having set time and then dedicating it and then repeating it, you know, and it's always it's going to be out of flow, but like you have to start somewhere and try.

00:39:51
Speaker 3: Whether you want to call it a regimen, whether you want to call it a ritual, whatever the fuck you need to call it to do it. If it ritual sounds cuter to you, and it sounds more.

00:39:59
Speaker 2: Sacred, it's sacred. Am I rich you will? Am I richu will?

00:40:03
Speaker 3: Is that at at ten am I begin work, it's my ritual and then if I pem my end work, my ritual's over and I begin my new ritual, which is cooking dinner.

00:40:12
Speaker 2: Maybe we don't call it work. Just money play, ritualize your life. It's what It's how I play when I want to make money. My currency play. You have a currency play date that means a workday. Okay.

00:40:27
Speaker 3: We have another question, which I guess can go hand and have. There's two different questions. What about retreats.

00:40:32
Speaker 2: How do you find your tribe of women as a mommy?

00:40:35
Speaker 3: Okay, so those are two different questions, and I think let me start with finding your tribe. You know, I realize that as an adult, it can feel really intimidating to make new friends. It can feel it can feel like the last thing on your list, you know, and then you're like alone at night and you're like, damn, I have no one to call. I have no girlfriend to like Kiki over this, this or that. You have to make it a priority. You have to go outside of your comfort zone. You have to go up to the friend in the bathroom and say, hey, bitch, want to hang out, Like I'm not going to promise you that you're gonna find your bestie. And you're in a mommy group.

00:41:15
Speaker 2: You know.

00:41:15
Speaker 3: Early on when I became a mom, like I was, I was also trying to find my tribe as well, and I was in like you know, like going to the mommy and me like play dates and you know, trying to even find my tribe at my daughter's school, and those moms weren't really were really it. It's spaces like this right here. Like if you fuck with this energy and this vibe, then there's a bunch of women literally right now in this chat that are probably your tribe right there, because they're already they're entertained by this conversation. They feel for this, they feel this conversation, they feel the energy that me and Mila and our guests share, and they understand. So I think it's about like connecting to the people and the communities that speak to you. Like that's really how you find your tribe. I mean for us, like we have our you know, we have our Facebook groups, like there's people in there and and again, like those things feel weird, right, You're like, so I'm going to meet someone on the internet, Yeah, bitch, you might have to, Like that's kind of the beauty of the internet sometimes, Yeah.

00:42:15
Speaker 2: Use it for what it's good for. Yeah, you know, cause technically we low key met via the internet and a lot of my friends that we've met through the podcast who are friends now are through the internet.

00:42:26
Speaker 3: Yeah, And like even in our discord, we have a channel specifically and they're called find your Tribe, And so there's women in there, like, Hey, I'm in LA. Does anybody like around want to like get lunch next weekend? I'm going to go to brunch next week? Does anybody want to come here? I'm in Houston. Like these are the ways that you are able to connect with people that you already know that are kind of on your frequency, and you kind of just have to step outside of not kind of you actually have to actively step outside of your comfort zone to meet your people. They're not going to find you, They're like sometimes they will and that's beautiful. But even me when I met Mila, like I was I felt so uncomfortable approaching her, but I was desperate, Like I knew that, like I knew that there was a woman out there that like was on my frequency because she was friends with my friends. So I was like, okay, Like that's step one.

00:43:13
Speaker 2: That's the same as being somebody in the tribe. If you like them, I'll probably like you yeah, like yeah, you trust it because it's like if you hang out with this person, then I know of them, we'll probably gel.

00:43:22
Speaker 3: Yeah, and then you use your discernment and then you figure out is it a go or is it a not go? And then you stay consistent like that's the that's the next part is like staying consistent with that relationship is like pouring into it how you want to be poured into as much as you would pour into a romantic relationship.

00:43:38
Speaker 2: Yeah, and not being scared to be like, hey, you know, what's up? What are you doing? And sometimes people won't respond, and not taking it personally and you won't always get together, but still trying. You know, I have some friends. I'm a friendly bitch, but I have friends who I'm like, Okay, I see that you really want to be friends. Okay, I see you girl, I'm gonna And that's because they're clear about it, you know. And it's just like sometimes I think we underestimate as women to the the divine timing of women coming into your life sometime when people are really trying to be your friend. I think sometimes people shy away from that when they're strangers or they don't know them or's not part of their immediate group. Sometimes that's God saying I'm fucking serving Ali youup right now. This is your friend, you know what I mean. And so it's just like you never know who's a message for you and or there's something you're supposed to supposed to birth together, And like, I've met so many friends that way, just being open to.

00:44:26
Speaker 4: Making new friends friends, friends, and I think we put so much.

00:44:39
Speaker 2: Effort into meeting romantic partners that we forget how important is to birth like friendships. Because a lot of your old friends that you've known for twenty fifteen years, they're still holding you to the old version of yourself. They haven't really Sometimes it's hard for your friends that have been your friends for a long ass time to accept you as this new version of yourself. And sometimes it requires that you meet friends on where you're at right now. So don't underestimates that.

00:45:03
Speaker 3: I think there's also another really important step to this process that I think is the reason why me and you became friends. It requires you to share something vulnerable and personal, like yes, you can meet those mommy friends and you can keep it surface, and that's exactly where you'll be. That's exactly where you'll keep it. That's exactly why you won't hear from her. That's exactly why you just see each other at the birthday parties. And that's it, Like, it really does require not only for you to get outside of your comfort zone and like and initiate the hangout, but then be brave enough and bold enough to share something vulnerable, because that's really the gel where someone's like, oh shit.

00:45:41
Speaker 2: Oh we are from Oh oh right, you know, And that's so true. I think about the first time we ever hung out, you know, like she did that thing. She came to the bathroom and she cornered me, and I was like, oh, okay, I didn't know her at all. I was very like I was caught off guard by it. But I really did want a friend who was in the same position as I was, as far as like parenthood very early, and that first time you hung out, like two days later you're like, hey, hey, how are you like trying to fill each other out, But there was nothing truly like deep about the conversation the first couple of times. It really wasn't until she came to the birthday party and shared the information about her being on tender and her like finding a really hot couple and that she had hung out with them that it made me feel comfortable to be myself and to really be like, oh, this is who I am and this is what you know, like where I'm at, and like, you know, just be honest about who I was because I felt comfortable enough to do that. So I think sometimes we're both both parties are being surface level because you're being fear of being judged or being too much. And I think we do ourselves a disservice by not just going deep immediately, like bitch, this is what I'm going through, you know. I think we try to save face all the time, so don't always like sometimes it requires for you to get especially in adulthood when we don't have a lot of time. We got to get to the nitty gritty quick.

00:46:54
Speaker 3: Yeah, like come on, bitch, I don't want to talk about canny little baby canny and his fucking colic, Like let's talk about his baby daddy ain't fucking there and fuck that?

00:47:04
Speaker 2: No kidding? So are you getting your pussy hater or what's that?

00:47:10
Speaker 3: Oh my god? And then as far as our retreats go, I mean that is obviously like that's like the level up of like really really really being committed to finding the tribe and integrating in person with them, Like our retreats are are really I don't even the sacred place. You know, there's probably some women in the chat right now that have come on our retreats, and maybe you can speak to it in like a few words if you're in the chat and just explain what happens there. But it's really an opportunity for you to actually meet the people that have are really dedicated to the calling of a healing, finding their purpose, igniting their self, restarting over, rebranding themselves, taking care of themselves, figuring some shit out, letting some shit go, allowing yourself to be taken care of for the first time, surrendering like all those things. Like that's really like what happens at our retreats. And we're actually about to leave to our annual Golden Gem retreat of Costa Rica. We do this one every single year in February first. It's usually either January thirty first or February first, And like I said, I think that for me and Miila, like our year really starts in February after this retreat. And I always tell people like if you are in a space in your life where you're ready to just just kind of do away with whatever, like just anything that's been holding you back, if you're ready to like rebrand your life, if you're ready to just meet the people that are committed to that process, and if you're ready to just kind of be taken care of for once. As moms now to take care of anybody else, I mean women, not even yourself.

00:48:55
Speaker 2: Really, we take care of you, right, like all women.

00:48:57
Speaker 3: I mean, I think all women need the retreats, but Mom's specific, Like we have such a hard time letting people take care of us and me and Mila at these retreats, like this is what we pride ourselves in, is that we take care of everything from start to finish. This is really a place for you to just take off the fucking mommy roll and just be the woman that you are and allow yourself to be guided. Allow yourself to be be guided by the feminine too, because I think as women were always looking for the man to guide us. But there's such deep healing and so much awakening and just magic and allowing the feminine to guide you as well. And yeah, so and we do still have some spots left, so if you guys are interested in coming to Costa Rica and it's last minute and you if you but shit, sometimes last minute.

00:49:44
Speaker 2: That's that's what it really when you need to go, some shit has happened and you need to make the decision, and it's prompted you and this is your sign and some things have happened and you're like, what the fuck am I gonna do? This is what you're gonna do. Just do the thing, don't think about it, and just let people come take care of you. I know, we've been talking a lot of like all the crazy shit that happens in the world, and like that has happened, and like how do you care for yourself and be gentle with yourself. It's like you're right a find your tribe because you need like nurturing. But go on vacation, like go get out of the environment of what is happening and be surrounded by people who care, and like this is one of those places where you're like, oh my god, is this a call? Everybody cares so much, everyone's so loving, and it's true, it's not a call. It's just a love fest. And it's because everyone comes seeking something, you know, and seeking and ready to give and it's just like an abundant feminine energy. And like I saw Frederic say, you know, she came and she spilled her heart about heart out about of a friendship breakup, and then she left with thirty new friends. Literally, you leave with twenty new friends. It's not even exaggeration. Like it's an amazing, beautiful thing when you allow women to take care of you, and you allow women to be soft and let them own their guards and just you know, really be there for each other. We are so why and like have so much information to give each other and so many lessons to share, and like I think that's really where the beauty comes in and the strength.

00:51:08
Speaker 3: I'm like, I think, especially with everything that's going on in La I literally cannot wait to just go a breathe fresh air, eat real food, eat real food, and just just unwind.

00:51:21
Speaker 2: Let go like this.

00:51:23
Speaker 3: We've been preparing for our season for months now, and like it's kind of like scary to like go into retreat mode in the midst of like what we're doing. But this is but that's just life, and that's life isn't going to slow down. There's no perfect time for you to take a trip sometimes, you know, like even us right now, like we're literally in the beginning of our season and we're like, bye, we'll be right back because we got to go take care of ourselves and some bitches, and like I never regret it. There's never a regret.

00:51:54
Speaker 2: God's always like, bitch, go sit down, and I always trust it and it always works out. Like little Johnny will it's teeth while you're gone for six days. I fucking promise you. And you know, trust the person you had a baby with, or like trust the assistant, trust the other person in your position, and all the people feel like they can't walk away from work. And sometimes it's like you can't do your work unless you do the thing for you, and like don't overgive to outside and not remember to give to you. So amen, I can't mother fucking white a man. Are you saw you pulled? Some you pulled? The Tarot time is a Tarot time. It's Tarot time, Terot time. I don't know if you want to pull, if I want to pull you pull, I pulled the High Priestess. Shall I look it up and look it up? I feel like it's it has lots to do with balance, can you say that this is our Mahogany tarot card. They're all black and brown representations illustration, and there's this one looks first of all B and J and I don't know what that means, but it looks like it's very balanced. Well, let me tell you what it means, baby.

00:53:12
Speaker 3: The upright means intuition, sacred knowledge, divine, feminine, and the subconscious mind. While the magician is the guardian of the conscious mind and the tangible world, the High Priestess is the guardian of the subconscious mind and the teacher of sacred knowledge and hidden mysteries. Sitting at the threshold of the conscious and subconscious mind, the High Priestess has an innate ability ability to travel between these realms effortlessly. She teaches you that the world is not always as it seems, and more profound influences are often at play. The High Priestess signifies spiritual enlightenment in her illumination, divine knowledge, and wisdom. She shows up in your tarror reading when the veil between you and the underworld is thin and you have the opportunity to access the knowledge deep within your soul. Now is the time to be still, so you can tune in to your intuition in Costa Rica.

00:54:03
Speaker 4: Yep.

00:54:04
Speaker 3: The answers you are seeking will come from within, from your deepest truth and knowing. Allow the High Priestess to become your guide as you venture deep into the jungle of your subconscious mind and access the inner wisdom. Connect with your intuition and your higher self through meditation, visualization, shamanic journeying aka mynashreams, and being a part of spiritual communities. Wow, welcome, Welcome to our spiritual community. Yeah this I mean obviously whenever we pull a card it always is like literally right on divine timing, and I think, uh put we put in the chat a link to the retreat if you guys are interested in coming to the retreat that we do have a few spots left. We have a solo room available, one more and a few more shared rooms available. So if you're feeling like you know what I need to fucking break, I need to get on this trip, please come and make sure you use the code Tribe at checkout. Use the code Tribe at checkout because you're gonna get a beautiful gift from us, and we have payment plans available too, So if like you're like, I can't afford this shit, don't worry, we will figure it out. You can come, I promise you.

00:55:14
Speaker 2: Yeah, make it, make it happen. Don't make an excuse, like, don't make excuses for yourself. Yeah, make it happy, like you make it happen for somebody else, like if it was baby, your little baby. I know.

00:55:26
Speaker 3: We did a little giveaway on Facebook in our Facebook group. We were giving away one hundred dollars mystery Bagoo mystery bag.

00:55:38
Speaker 2: Mm hm.

00:55:39
Speaker 3: We never we never really do a lot of giveaways, but I'm excited if you join our Facebook group, We're gonna be doing a lot more giveaways in that space. And so in this mystery bag, WEMLA were like, what should we include in this hundred dollars giveaway bag? And I was like, I think it's gonna be a little bit more than a hundred dollars.

00:55:55
Speaker 2: Yeah, probably so.

00:55:57
Speaker 3: Number one, our good Mom crew, Neck show the ladies. I feel like I'm on Home Shopping Network.

00:56:03
Speaker 2: This is your specialty, your expertise, wasn't it like go to I did go.

00:56:07
Speaker 3: I went to Home Shopping Network school. So you guys see this, This is a very rich beautiful cot and only the highest luxury for our bitches.

00:56:16
Speaker 2: It also includes the good.

00:56:18
Speaker 3: Mom beautiful puff paint, high quality puff paint because we only do the best for our extra puff.

00:56:26
Speaker 2: You can't really see it from here, but it's three D.

00:56:29
Speaker 3: It is three D and then boom on the back, we have our beautiful trippy happy face because we're some trippy bitches. So this is something that is included in the giveaway.

00:56:42
Speaker 2: And oh go ahead, we're also including this top of the line fourteen gold plated Bad Choice necklace.

00:56:52
Speaker 3: Orlando cut to Jamila, so speaking she can really show show the people you see this.

00:56:58
Speaker 2: It's blame every time you come.

00:57:01
Speaker 3: And I must buying bang yes, and I you know what, I love this, Mela and I wear these necklaces literally every day. We shower with them. We never take them off. They never turn like literally they do not turn. I know you all read. You know I just bought this fucking stupid ass necklace that I'm wearing here. You don't have to zoom into this. It was supposed to be non tarnish. It's just already tarnishing.

00:57:26
Speaker 2: Yeah, these really don't tarnish. I don't like to really take jewelry off when I shower because I'm lazy. I think I'm rich. It's diamonds, but it's never turns and it never like makes you itch earning those things. It's definitely like the gold plate. It is is gold plating.

00:57:39
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's it's beautiful. It's beautiful, and.

00:57:42
Speaker 2: It kind of lets people know, like, you know what kind of type time you're on. Bad choices, bad choices, bad choices.

00:57:48
Speaker 3: And last but not least, you know, I had to include a beauty blender. This is my favorite product. It's also my family business. For those that don't know, my mom was is also was also a single mom when she raised me. She was a makeup artist and came up with this on set. She used to be the department head for the show Girlfriends and started cutting sponges and created the beauty blender. And so this is a woman owned, Latina owned product. It's the original. So for all the other dupes that you see at the CBS's and the Walgreens that ain't this, this is the high quality, the original beauty blender. And so this I'm also going to throw into the bag and make sure you get it wet when you use it. You have to get it wet, squeeze it out, damp, bounce, and so I'm going to pick the winner right here live, Oh Lenny, do.

00:58:46
Speaker 2: The damn thing like I'm on wheel of fortune. Like I don't know why because it is a wheel. Look, it's been the wheel. Oh cute.

00:58:54
Speaker 3: Shout out to Terranny who hooked us up and figured this out for us because.

00:58:58
Speaker 2: I had known.

00:58:58
Speaker 3: Oh my god, it's so cute. See look at our pictures in the background, and shit, ah, okay, we're gonna spin the wheel.

00:59:04
Speaker 2: Live y'all. Let's spin. Let's spin. Everyone's in there already. Yes, yeah, this is interesting technology.

00:59:12
Speaker 3: Oh Crimson Doula underscore. Lenae, you are the winner of the Good Mom's Bad Choices giveaway. I've seen Crimson Crimson Dola, Lena, you are the winner.

00:59:33
Speaker 2: If you're in here, you won. You will be rocking all the Good Mom's Bad Choices merch no time.

00:59:42
Speaker 3: And if you haven't checked out our store, make sure you go to Good Momsbad Choices dot com check out our merch store. We not only have the good Mom's sweatshirts, we have the good dads, we have the good aunties, we have the good Baby. We got the good kid, we got the whole. It's the good, it's the Good family collection. We got it all for you, guys. So make sure you check out our cutest fuck merch store and support moms who make shit.

01:00:13
Speaker 2: Oh oh mushroom, Oh not the mushroom.

01:00:17
Speaker 3: Oh speaking of mushrooms, guys, I don't know if you've seen me on Instagram talking about this mushroom tea that I've been drinking.

01:00:25
Speaker 2: Oh, Schedule thirty five.

01:00:26
Speaker 3: Yes, So this brand, Schedule thirty five, sent me their shit, and then I wasn't sure because I was like, first of all, how are you sending me mushrooms in the mail? Like?

01:00:36
Speaker 2: Is this legal?

01:00:36
Speaker 3: Apparently it is, because they send it all over the US. It is legal. I don't know how, but it is.

01:00:43
Speaker 2: Listen, don't don't. They're a verified brand. Okay.

01:00:46
Speaker 3: Anyway, I was like, let me, let me just try try it out. And so I started off with their teas, which I'm obsessed with. They have like a they have a two hundred milligram tea. They have like different like levels.

01:00:58
Speaker 2: Which one did you do? I did the two hundred milligram one, and like, but how'd you feel?

01:01:03
Speaker 3: You know, what I wasn't sure like how I thought maybe it was going to make me feel like a little like very relaxed, which kind of was what I was looking for, but really it wasn't even I was looking for my anxiety to go away, is what I really wanted, which usually I think I need to be relaxed for that to happen. But it actually gave me energy. It gave me energy, but like the anxiety was gone, and so it gave me energy. So I wasn't necessarily relaxed or I couldn't do shit because a lot of times, like when you're taking like I don't know, when you're taking like a pill like xanax, you have anxiety, which is because now you're gonna be laid out.

01:01:37
Speaker 2: Yeah, you can't do shit out. Yeah.

01:01:39
Speaker 3: So I really enjoyed. I really enjoyed taking this tea in the morning. I'll drink in the morning before our meetings. And it doesn't make you feel like how you would feel if you actually took like a lot of mushrooms. I think a lot of people it's microdocing. So a lot of people have misconceptions around plant medicine in general and think like, oh my god, I'm going to take mushrooms and I'm gonna be like seeing fucking tied eye rainbows and shit. But it actually made me feel really productive. It made me feel anxiety free, it made me feel really create It makes me feel really creative. And so for those of you, because a lot of people have reached out to me about this specific brand schedule thirty five, I'm gonna have tea, put the link in the chat and use code good Moms fifteen at checkout for fifteen percent off. Like I said, they ship all over the United States. So if this is something you've wanted to try, I highly recommend, if you've never even tried plant medicine at all, to either start with the two gram tea or the.

01:02:36
Speaker 2: Capsules same point is it two or point?

01:02:39
Speaker 3: Well, I'm sorry, it's two hundred milligrams, but the package has two grams on there. There's two grams worth of mushrooms in Yeah, and I think they they recommend three days on, four days off, three days on four days.

01:02:51
Speaker 2: Off to like kind of like acclimate your body.

01:02:53
Speaker 1: Yeah.

01:02:53
Speaker 3: So I don't know if there's any microdosing mommies or people in the chat, maybe throwing a mushroom in there. If you're if you're down with the plant medicine.

01:03:02
Speaker 2: It's definitely a good alternative for like for like anxiety meds or something like that or something. Because mushrooms saved my life twenty twenty.

01:03:12
Speaker 3: Yeah, they really did.

01:03:13
Speaker 2: They really did. They really did, really dead.

01:03:25
Speaker 3: And you know, even at our retreats, we do we do a much heavier dose. At our retreat. We actually go on an actual real journey during one of the last few days of the retreat. And that is so beautiful too, because we're literally in the middle of the jungle. It's such a safe container, and it's accompanied by sound, healing, reiki, all the things. But if you're just like, let me just dip my toe in try schedule thirty five, it's really a game changer. Well, we should get out of here soon.

01:04:00
Speaker 2: Okay, Okay, I've been having so much fun with our friends, but I guess we can carry along.

01:04:04
Speaker 3: Wait, but before we get out, I didn't want to share a hoory okay that someone sent us because I feel like it was really it was really something. It was really it was really something.

01:04:16
Speaker 2: So we have if you also, if you have.

01:04:21
Speaker 3: Any horries or bad choices of the week, or just something you want to share, like a secret that you want to share anonymously that maybe you've just needed to get off your chest. We have a link that you can click on in our Instagram or maybe I don't know, tea, maybe you can share it here. But either way you can find it our Instagram. You can share your stuff with us, so we can share and talk to you about it.

01:04:47
Speaker 2: But our hory, where is our hoorriy?

01:04:53
Speaker 3: We find it?

01:04:55
Speaker 2: It's time for horse stories. Mm hmm m m. This is a horror.

01:05:04
Speaker 3: And also I don't know this is This is definitely a secret safe because yeah, here we go. My bestie's old side, nigga is my new side?

01:05:19
Speaker 2: Nigga? Did she give him to you? And she doesn't know we talk.

01:05:28
Speaker 3: She's married and lives out of state and they haven't seen each other in over a year.

01:05:33
Speaker 2: Oh damn, she had a side, niggah. She was married, okay, her bestie. Oh oh, that's a real side nigga. Okay.

01:05:38
Speaker 3: I met him on a dating app not knowing that it was him, ended up talking to her about it casually one day and she said, wait a minute, who no, stop talking to him? But me and him vibe. We fuck good, We have a good time, and he's just the best eater I've ever had. I can't come up off him, and I know I need to, because ultimately he's not my nigga. A girl I used to talk to even ask me about him before, come to find out they were talking too.

01:06:06
Speaker 2: He's for everybody, he'd he'd be on the ass. Your friend needs to just understand he's for everybody.

01:06:10
Speaker 3: How do I leave this freaky ass nigga alone? I need it out so I can find my own freaky ass nigger. Oh I didn't mention he ain't got no car, live with his mama, Oh no, and barely got a job. Oh no, lord, And he'd be asking me for money.

01:06:29
Speaker 2: Oh no, Lord, No, I don't know. I reveal him.

01:06:32
Speaker 3: We listen and we don't judge, but please judge my ass.

01:06:37
Speaker 2: Sorry it came out too soon. Now you know that. Now the dick must be dick In.

01:06:47
Speaker 3: You know, broke dick is the best dick.

01:06:49
Speaker 2: Because I got somewhere, need somewhere to say, you know it's dick In, Because if this bitch said don't talk to him, I'd be like, if we don't take his luck, get his ass out of here. Sure, take him. Oh my goodness, Oh my goodness, he must be a girl.

01:07:03
Speaker 3: You need to leave that man alone.

01:07:05
Speaker 2: But I mean, maybe just get it in a few times.

01:07:08
Speaker 3: You know, you have you have until February first, bitch, your time is up on February first. That's when New Year's begins, and you gotta drop this nigga. Okay, no more broke, freaky ass side niggas on the February first, Let's do a deadline.

01:07:24
Speaker 2: You know what I will say on a positive note is at least you're aware that this is not your nigga, and that you're not trying to get him a job at your job, and you're not trying to set him up with a finance niggas so he can get himself a car and get him together. Because at least you're allusional illusional. I just waited them. At least you're lusional, which is the opposite of delusional. Hmmm. I like that you illusional. So like, sometimes we do stupid shit, but as long as we're aware of conscious that we're doing stupid shit, and like it's cold, it's called aware. A stupid aware bitch, You know you're not just a stupid bitch. You're a stupid aware bitch. Stupid. And you know I have a lot of respect for a stupid aware bitch because I've been there, You've been stupid bitch. We've all been stupidware beaches. Like I'm aware, I'm stupid bitch. Okay, I'm aware. You ain't gotta tell me. I'm telling you. You gotta tell me because I'm telling you. But all stupid aware bitchness comes with it. You know, there's a deadline, there's a you know, we can't you can't be a stupid aware bitch for twelve months because then you're just a stupid bitch. No, then you're just a stupid bitch. Fact. You know, there's a threshold, there's a timeline, there's a there's a quick timeline. And trust me, I know because I have grazed, I have gone penetrated far past the line. So just let me tell you, as this once stupid aware bitch turned stupid bitch, it.

01:08:43
Speaker 3: Can go quickly turned fiance.

01:08:46
Speaker 2: Have my ring damp turn fiance, okay, because you know you gotta sometimes you gotta. You gotta fall so you can walk, so you can run, so just take it for me because now I'm a fian. Oh my god, that's gonna be my whole spiel. I'm like, I'm a fiance, so let me just tell you some relationship advice as the fiance of this Oh god here, as the fiance of the podcast, I would just say, drop it low, suck it slow. Because I'm the fiance of the podcast, I can come to you with all my relationship advice. Signed xoxo Mila the fiance, And I'm gonna say it like that fiance because it's French. Oh my gosh.

01:09:26
Speaker 3: And if you'd like to donate to her nonprofit Hoes with Hope, you know, click the link in this episode description.

01:09:32
Speaker 2: Thus he hopes is direct fund that helps all hose who are stupid bitches come be stupid ware bitches to be Hose with Hope aka fiance and they will come on the retreat so they could do it deep intensive of being less stupid and more smart. When they come back, it's more hopeful, more hopeful. Have you seen scared straight? It's that but gentle with meditations and sound bowls and titties like at my titties, be free, be free. We're gonna save you to death to get that nigga all about your point.

01:10:03
Speaker 3: He's gonna be out of there.

01:10:06
Speaker 2: Besides you and saved you. You're gonna smoke that nigga out when you go back. You canna be allergic to his ass. Okay, So come on down to the gid Vibertrue, there's still time for you to be an aware bitch. There's still time. Let's take some meala moans from the fiance. Let's take a deep breath in.

01:10:33
Speaker 3: At least with sounds.

01:10:38
Speaker 2: Life is hard, the world is crazy. At least we have each other. Mm hmmm. You don't have to be fucking to moan. Sometimes just breathing is good enough. Life is good, and we love you so much.

01:11:15
Speaker 3: Make sure to subscribe to our YouTube channel if you haven't already, and please rate and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts if you haven't already, if you've been a long time listener, it's time.

01:11:28
Speaker 2: It's time. We need that, We need that from you. Subscribe on YouTube so you can join us live. Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts Spotify, Apple, etc. And come visit us with the Good Vibra Tree. Follow the Good Vibra Tree because it's popping over there, and follow Good Moms if you don't already Good Mom's Underscore Bad Choices, join patreons so you can get access to discord so you can find your community aka your friends. And of course follow Eric and I I'm Mela with an h underscore map with two p's, and I'm at watch Erica. And if you have some business that you need to tell us because I'm a fiancee, so I can give dating advice, etc. And Hope Hose with Hope advice. If you have any confessions, any hories, call your big sisss and we'll give you good advice.

01:12:16
Speaker 3: Yes, just click the link in the episode description and fill out the type form anonymously and we'll share all your bad choices anonymously and give you advice.

01:12:26
Speaker 2: We love you until next time. Hose with Hope signing out, Pose with Hope signing out. This is fun.

01:12:41
Speaker 3: Good Mom's Bad Choices is a production of the Black Effect podcast Network. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. Don't forget to subscribe to and rate our show. And you can't connect with us on social media at good Mom's Underscore Bad Choices. Make make sure to subscribe to our YouTube channel at good mom's Bad Choices to watch our episodes and join our private community on Patreon to see extended episodes, uncensored content.

01:13:10
Speaker 2: And more.

01:13:10
Speaker 3: At patreon dot com slash good Moms Bad Choices