Walk 2 Wealth Ep 72 - 2:21:23, 9.51 PM

[00:00:00] This is Walk to Wealth, episode 72. Welcome to Walk to Wealth. Why enlighten and empower young adults to build wealthy, abundant lives? I'm your host, John Mendez, and I'm currently walking to Wealth as we speak. And if you know the traditional route of finishing college, working in nine to five interior sixties, and hopefully having enough safer retirement isn't a path you wanna take, then join me as we walk to wealth together.

[00:00:30] Before we start today's episode, you know, I gotta give my shout out. So today's shoutout goes to T Tucker 52. I'm pretty sure, if I'm not mistaken, it's Terry. So shout out to Terry. He says, John goes deep. John Mendez takes the time to research his podcast guests and guess the most insight for the listener.

[00:00:46] Big shout out for the for the review. Thank you for supporting the show. Without further ado, let's get right into this episode. Ever wonder what it takes to become a successful. Not just the manager, but someone that people feel compelled [00:01:00] to follow, someone that inspires people, that people aspire to be.

[00:01:04] On today's episode I brought on Julie B. She is an award-winning entrepreneur. A leader of leaders in an engaging storyteller. Julie has spoken for 14 plus years in the topic of leadership, management, employee management, morale, workplace culture, business ownership and entrepreneurship. And her leadership insights have been featured on Fast Company, Forbes, thrive Global, and many, many more.

[00:01:25] She has a book that's coming out in 2024 that hasn't released yet, and she's doing tons of amazing things, but it wasn't always this. Well, there's a lot of starting points that I can start with, but I will, I'll, I'll try to keep the short and sweet, but take it all the way back to the beginning. So when I was, honestly, when I was in high school, I had a, a tutoring business and I carried that over into college.

[00:01:47] I always had that entrepreneurial bug, right? Like I always was really interested in running a business. So, went to college though, and got a typical degree and got a degree in accounting. I mean, ended up getting a [00:02:00]master's degree in accounting as well. Did that outta college for about four years, and then in oh eight I lost my job.

[00:02:07] I was working in residential construction at that point, so lost my job and decided to, up until that point, I had been using social media quite a bit for business purposes. And I decided to start a digital marketing agency. We were doing everything under the sun websites, seo, social media. But then in 2010 I really niched down into social media and started helping other businesses use social media marketing to grow their businesses.

[00:02:38] So that is my, that was really my first like real company. That's eMAR social media. And that company is still up in running and we still have clients and we continue to take on new clients over there, but I've got a great team over there working on it and running it. I'm still involved in like the strategy and the leadership of it.

[00:02:56] But my team pretty much takes care of most of the work over there. So these [00:03:00] days, in 2020, I started podcasting, which kind of led to this whole realization that my real passion is business ownership. I, I have a really strong belief that business owners have a lot of power to change certain things in our.

[00:03:16] Country that maybe we want to see changed and I just wanna support them in that. And so I started podcasting in 2020 and then started doing consulting and paid beginning engagements in 2021. And then this year I actually landed a book deal, my bus, my book is titled The Business Owner's Guide to Burnout.

[00:03:36] It's not out yet. It will be available for pre-sale next year, 2023 and then and 2024 is when it will actually be in bookstores and available per purchase everywhere and audiobook and all of that. So it's been a really kind of winding organic. Road that has kind of come full circle. I started in high school running a tutoring company, [00:04:00] teaching people teaching other high school students and middle school students math.

[00:04:04] And now I'm back into this teaching mode of helping business owners really execute their vision that they have for their business. And that comes from my own passion just to support support business owners because I've seen how important they are to. Just, just our communities and our economy, and I think it's, I don't think they get enough support and I just want to play that part and be a, be a really big ally for them.

[00:04:32] Yeah. Amazing. So you mentioned you always had the entrepreneurial bug. When was the first time that you realized that you had that in you? Was it and in the touring company that you had in high school? Did you kind of realize it earlier on, you just didn't get a chance to cultivate it as. I think I realized it in college because I, the tutoring business was really, I didn't think of it as a business, right?

[00:04:53] Like I thought of it similarly to somebody who might go out and mow grass in the summer for, for extra money, or might [00:05:00] clean for extra money when they were a teenager. I didn't really think of it as a business. I just thought of it as a job where I was just making some cash and that was it. But then when I took it to college basically and realized, I had a, a, a really great way of teaching higher level math, like calculus and trigonometry and those types of math to individuals, to speaking the language that they needed to hear and, and for, to fill like a need that was not being met.

[00:05:31] So I remember I made flyers and I put them up in, in the buildings around campus and I mean, I was like booked pretty quickly. I didn't have much capacity. I got so busy. That I tried. I actually tried to bring in some people that I knew from high school that actually went to the same college that I went to.

[00:05:50] But what it, at the end of the day, I wanted to be in college and not running a business . I actually just kept a few really good clients and didn't take on any [00:06:00] more additional clients, but it was, it was in, it was in college when I realized like, oh, I'm a business owner. Like that's what I'm doing here.

[00:06:05] I'm running a. Yeah. And so, and tell us kind of what that was like because at that point in time or that age group where it's like a lot of people are still lost, a lot of people don't know what they wanna do. Mm-hmm. and you kind of found something, they found a way to make money out of it that was pretty straightforward.

[00:06:18] You found something that you were good at, found people that needed help at what you were good at, and then started charging them for help. So, but how was Dr. Hannah, like, now you mentioned that you wanted to be a college student, right? Mm-hmm. and not a business donor at that point in time. Yeah. Yeah. What kind of guard us around your kind of thoughts there around, like, what was that kind of like, how did that affect your social life, your college life and things like that, and what were your thoughts at that point in time?

[00:06:38] Well, what was interesting was I realized that I, I could fill a need that wasn't being met, even though all of the professors had office hours. And even though you could get free tutoring through our university, there was a need for somebody who I guess really understood [00:07:00] math and also could speak. could meet the, meet the person who was needing to be tutored, could meet them where they were and not judge them and not get frustrated with them.

[00:07:09] So that's kind of my, I think that's one of my superpowers is that I, I'm really good at meeting people where they are. So I knew I had an opportunity there and that's why I went for it. And the decision process to honestly to, to kind of pull back the reins a little bit and not just grow it and go crazy.

[00:07:27] This was a different time. This was before social media was a thing. It was, I literally had a paper flyer. And it was, it was hard to manage it all. I mean, I was still, texting wasn't even a thing yet. We weren't texting yet. I still had a landline telephone, so my roommate would get kind of annoyed that our, our landline was being taken up by phone calls for tutoring or, or clients calling to book, to, to book a tutoring appointment.

[00:07:50] So I actually had to get it, like another landline just for my business. And I, I just, I was really busy. I was busy keeping up my own grades and I was busy with the work [00:08:00] and I just decided, I didn't, at that time, I didn't need a whole lot of money to, to live on. So I, I kind of just kept my favorite clients and, and tutored them.

[00:08:11] And that gave me the space to go to school, do my own work, really succeed there and help them and make, make some money and then also still have, have some fun and go out with my friends and have the whole college experience. So that was kind of, so it was really about recognizing. I was only gonna be in that place in my life one time and I didn't want to spend the whole time working.

[00:08:34] No, definitely. That's, you know, it takes a lot of awareness to get to that and, uh, you've, Shown a, a history so far, uh, very early on being successful, starting businesses, kind of, and then being, having an awareness to cut down when you needed to. I kind of wanted to ask you, you know, a lot of our beliefs around money and business ownership kind of formulate when we were young, right?

[00:08:52] In our mm-hmm. in our household. So like, what kind of questions? Not quite questions, but like quantum beliefs, I guess you could say, whether they were limiting beliefs or empowering beliefs [00:09:00] that you had kind of growing up, and how, what was the topic of money like in your house? Yeah, so in my household it's interesting.

[00:09:07] There was always, there. It, it's, it's really, that's a good question. There was never enough money, but we always had everything we needed. I don't know. My parents one, one was a kindergarten aid and one was he worked, my dad worked in a factory but got laid off when factory jobs went away. Basical. And he finished his working career as a high school janitor.

[00:09:30] So they, my parents did not make a lot of money, and they raised three kids on that. And I, I remember my, my dad would leave, so I grew up in West Virginia and he actually, to have a job, he would leave on Sunday nights and go to Pennsylvania where factories were still open, and he would work there Monday through Friday.

[00:09:52] And he would drive home on Friday night, and I remember him leaving my mom like 10 to $15 for three kids for a week. [00:10:00] So I know we did, we did not have a lot of money, but it never felt like, I never wanted for anything. Like I always had a, a, a warm place to sleep. I always felt safe. I always had food and I think.

[00:10:13] What was going on is that our community around us helped a lot. Like we had my, my grandparents were there and I, my brother and sister both started working like when they were 15. I started working when I was 15. So I think that we had other, other types of support, but because of all that money when I came out of high school, it.

[00:10:34] My mom, I, I will never forget this, my mom wanted to be, to go into accounting because she knew I could make quite a bit of money doing that. And so success was defined by money and even to, to someday, even to some ex extent Today, my family still defines. How much money you make to be like, what success is.

[00:10:51] And I don't personally prescribe to that. Like I, I, I think I'm a more, have a more realistic you because I've been a business owner because I have [00:11:00] seen money comes and goes. But things like your health and your mental health especially, and your relationships with your family and your friends, those things are money can't buy.

[00:11:12] And I think that I've had to do a lot of untangling in terms of success being equated to how much is in my bank account and rebuilding my own definition of success over the past 15 years in business. Cuz when you start a business as a business owner, it's, it's tough. And when you started in the middle of a recession, it's really tough.

[00:11:32] So, well, you know, I got, I got hit pretty hard with the realization that money does not equal. Either way, whether you have, I mean, I know business owners who have made millions and millions of dollars and they don't feel successful, successful is not defined by what's in your bank account. That's the one thing I know for sure.

[00:11:51] Yeah, definitely. So then let me ask you then, what's success? So for me personally, success is, [00:12:00] I, I, I measure success by how much I laugh in a day by the, the value, not the value, the, I wanna say the quality of relationships that I have. Not even the quantity, but the quality relationships that I have. And that's really, personally and honestly, if I can sleep at night, , that's a huge definition of success for me.

[00:12:20] And from a business perspective, like our big vision is to help 1 million business owners by 2032. So that's a pretty clear, like line in the sand definition of success. And we're gonna, we have, we're, by the end of this year, we're gonna figure out how to have all that measured and what that actually means.

[00:12:38] But John, one thing I I realized not that long ago actually, is that you cannot. How do I say this? Goals and success are not the same thing. So achieving goals can help you achieve success, but if you only define success by a goal, you will never feel successful because high achievers [00:13:00] always have a next thing.

[00:13:01] Like as soon as I got my book deal, it was like, okay, what's next? Or as soon as I like, as soon as I won the podcasting award, it wasn't like, oh, I won a gold award. It was next year. I won a win. Best in show. So if you only define success by the milestones that you hit and the achievements that you actually reach, You won't, it's hard to feel successful.

[00:13:26] So I, I really had to go on kind of a journey and take a step back in terms of defining success for myself. And it's really an internal intrinsic thing. It's the joy, it's the laughter, it's the. Like having a really good relationship with my wife, like knowing that's steady and solid and then like my friendships and my family relationships.

[00:13:44] And then, yeah, honestly being able to sleep at night. Success is a, for me, it's a destination that I want to hang out in for a while. I don't wanna just like be constantly chasing it. Yeah. So that's kind of how I look at it. Yeah. And so you've been able to find success in your life. [00:14:00] You're now helping business owners pretty much do what you've done mm-hmm.

[00:14:03] and be a successful leader. Mm-hmm. , right? Yeah. And I know you love talking about leadership mm-hmm. , and so getting more into the conversation, I appreciate you sharing your story with us. Yeah. But in terms of, on the topic of leadership, where do you think most people get it wrong? I, I think a lot of people get stuck managing.

[00:14:21] So I think you, you get a lot of people who. And I think also we're also promoted. There's a saying in that you're promoted to your level of incompetence. And I think what actually happens is we're promoted to our level of leadership incompetence. I think that that's actually what's happening because if you get, you just, you get stuck being a manager and you can't focus on the leadership.

[00:14:45] And the way that I differentiate those things is man managing means you're focused on the work. So you're focused on projects, deadlines, quality control, those types of. Leadership is all about the people you leave. So you're, you're [00:15:00] focused on emotional intelligence, their career, mentoring, coaching, making sure they have their, the mission and vision and core values and you correcting when you need to.

[00:15:09] Correct. But that's, that's really the difference. And I think that we, we don't put enough emphasis on that for our leaders, so they get stuck being managers. and which, which is just making sure the work gets done, which is, it's important. But if you're looking at a manager and you're expecting them to be a leader and you're wondering why they're not leading, it's probably because they, they don't have the tools to step outside of managing it.

[00:15:38] They may not know the difference. If you, if somebody has a title, if somebody has a thyroid that's manager or director, it doesn't necessarily mean they know how to lead. They know how to get projects done. So I think. One thing that I'm helping business owners and business owners get stuck. What I say is they get stuck being a leader of managers, and sometimes [00:16:00] they're just a, sometimes they're a manager of managers and they need help to elevate beyond that manager role themselves.

[00:16:07] And then they also need help helping their, their, their key employees. Also elevate as well from manager to leader, because you, at some point, if you are running a. You are going to hit a wall where you cannot be in every single room, every single conversation all the time, and you need someone to be a leader that you're comfortable with being in that room and handling that conversation.

[00:16:34] The only way you get there is if you train those individuals to be the leader that you would, you would be in that room. That's how, that's how business owners are able to let go. That's how they're able to not micro manage. Is when they feel like if somebody's showing up in a room on their behalf, they're comfortable with that.

[00:16:51] And I think that that's, that's really where people kind of get stuck in, in the managerial role. Yeah. And so a lot of the times in [00:17:00] business ownership, a lot of the stuff we learn is trial by fire. Oh yeah. That's when we invest in a culture or something. They're, we have a mentor that decides to take us under their wings, but, and I feel like there's a bunch of classes for sales s scripts, a bunch of classes for how to e-commerce and stuff like that.

[00:17:12] But like, Soft skills, like I guess this will kind of fall under this, like, you know mm-hmm. being a, a person Right. And getting those core values and figuring out what those are within yourself, I feel like is a good kind of starting point. Mm-hmm. , uh, to then to be able to lead. Because if you can't lead yourself, how do you gen treat others to lead?

[00:17:28] Mm-hmm. . So what are some things that a leader must find within themselves so that they can become the person that can teach others to fill those shoes? Yeah. It's, it's funny, it's leadership starts with self-leadership. The, the foundation of that is knowing your own personal core values. I think that that's where you have to start.

[00:17:50] And your personal core values are different than your business's core values or the company you're working for. They're gonna be different. So, but you gotta know your own core values because [00:18:00] that's what drives all of us, whether we know, know them or not. Whether we know what our core values are on paper, or we don.

[00:18:08] what drives most of our decisions are those core values. And when you make decisions that are outside the framework of your core values, you're not gonna be able to sleep at night. You're not gonna be able to, like, you're gonna be stressed out more. So it's really, that's where it starts. You gotta know your core values and there's, there's a lot of ways you can do that.

[00:18:26] I mean, I, I have a process I go through, but it's not the process for everybody, but at least knowing your own, that's really important. And then from there, You've gotta like practice those and you, the other thing that I often tell people is what, one of the, one of the things that has helped me the most when I'm leading or managing, I will actually say like, this is a leadership conversation or, or, this, let me, let me put my manager hat on for a minute.

[00:18:54] So differentiating the next step is kind of differentiating for yourself when you're leading and when [00:19:00]you're manag. And one of the best ways to do that is to basically say it out loud. So those are just like kind of some of the starter things that you do. And then from there, in terms of self leadership, you just, you gotta like walk the walk basically.

[00:19:14] You can't just talk the talk, you gotta be an example. You have to embody whatever it is your culture, your core values. And I like to. Suggest people have like a, a core values playbook or a culture playbook where they like literally write down examples of how they would wanna show up or how a certain core value is going to show up for them, or even stories of how it's shown up in the past.

[00:19:36] Just to remind them like, this is what it looks like when I'm living my core values. So those are just a few things that you can do from a self leadership perspective to help you become a better leader. Yeah. So then let me ask you, cuz a lot of people that are listening to this right now are not at the stage where they have, you know, a team or at the stage where they are hiring.

[00:19:53] How do you get friends and family to buy in? Yeah, I mean, it's, it's kind of the same thing. Like, I have a situation going on right [00:20:00] now where I'm, I'm basically mentoring my nephew. He's, he's, he's. Late twenties, and he's, he's just struggling with some stuff. And instead of telling him what he should do, I ask him what his plan is.

[00:20:12] I ask him for his input. I'm asking him to bring his ideas to the table, and then I bring my experience to the table and we work through some things. So it's kind of the same thing. If you can get, you gotta, it's, it's getting them involved in the decision process as early as possible. A and sometimes, I mean, oftentimes you like ultimately, Where you want something to end up with your family.

[00:20:36] It's a little bit different because I think that they, they get more with my wife for example, like she obviously gets, she gets more of an opinion of where like what the vision is, I think for our life together than maybe my employee might get for like, where my business is going. But I, it's the same thing, like you gotta get involved in the conversation.

[00:20:54] I think that that's really leadership I don't think is any longer somebody drawing a line in the [00:21:00] sand and saying, It's my way or the highway I, which is, is kind of what leadership was not that long ago. But now I think leader leadership is more of a collective of, there's gotta be one person out in front who's, who's willing to carry the torch, right?

[00:21:15] There's gotta be one person out front who's willing to actually lead. , but I think the ideas that propel that forward is more of a collective effort. So that's how you, you and I think that that's how you get by and you make sure that like whatever you're working towards is a collective effort and it's something that people want.

[00:21:34] I also really stress the concept of making the best decision for the most people because sometimes, sometimes there's a decision that has to be made and. Somebody may, there may be one person out of seven people that don't support it on your team or in your family, but if it's, if it's what everybody else is moving towards, I think, I think a true mark of leadership is being able [00:22:00] to agree to disagree, but still move towards the vision that people are, that, that people have bought into.

[00:22:05] There's gonna be, and also making sure that that person isn't there. Like saying, I told you so. I told you this wouldn't work. You're a leader, if you can get that person on board to at least like move forward with you, they may not have think it's the best idea, but they're, they believe in you, the individual, and whether it's in business or in family, it's kind of the same thing.

[00:22:27] So I think that collective decision making, but still knowing that there's gotta be one person who's just out there willing and ready to kind of step out in front. Because some people don't wanna be that person and that's totally. . So I think that that's business, work, family collective decision. That's how you get the buy-in.

[00:22:47] And then there's gotta be one person, at least who's, who's willing to step out and say, okay, follow me. So then let me ask you kind of a question on the, on the opposite side then, or I guess on the, on reverse side, I guess. [00:23:00]Mm-hmm. . So what if you're the visionary and you have the thought that goes against the collective?

[00:23:05] What, what's your advice there? Listen to the collective sometimes. I mean, I. Like, you've gotta have people on your team who are also willing to push back on you, because if you surround yourself with people who just say yes all the time, you're probably, you're, you're really not a, I don't know, you're really not a leader if you have that, I don't think.

[00:23:25] I think you just, you have a, a bunch of Yes people. So I, I have had several examples where my team has, I've had an. And they, they, they know how to work with me because I invest in assessments and we all see each other's assessments. So we all know like, yeah, Julie's the visionary and she's gonna have 1500 ideas every single day.

[00:23:49] And there is one vision we're working towards. So there's, there's one person who tends to keep me pretty focused on that, but sometimes they know you better than you know yourself. So [00:24:00] I think that there have also been times where I have. No, this is the way we're going and here's why. So I think what you do there is you def definitely listen, but if you are, if you know in your gut as a leader, we need to go in a certain direction, and that direction is in line again with your core values and your mission and your vision, you have something to fall back on.

[00:24:24] You don't just say it's not just because I said so. It's, it's, I heard what you. I appreciate, I appreciate your perspective and your point of view, and I never want you to stop bringing that to the table with this decision, though, we're gonna move, I'm going to move us in this direction because he, because here's how it supports our vision.

[00:24:44] Here's how it supports the mission, and here's how it stays in line with our core values. So you, you have that framework built. So even if you have somebody who on their team who disagree, They agreed to the framework to begin with. So as long as you keep it in that, that means [00:25:00] it. I mean, honestly, yeah, it's like keeping it in in the box basically.

[00:25:03] As long as you keep it in there, in that framework of mission, vision, and values, that's how you manage through that. But I always tell my team like, don't hesitate to, I sometimes I have to pull things out of them cuz some of them aren't like as willing to. But, and I know who they are thanks to assessments, but I do ask them like, don't ever stop bringing your ideas to the table or your concerns.

[00:25:28] I mean, I had a, I had a conversation this morning where I was like, well, I'm not gonna do it that way. And my key employee was like, well, I think we need to take these opportunities as they come and just review them one by one. And I will. And and I said, okay. We had a quick conversation about how that supports the vision, and now she's right.

[00:25:49] So I'm moving forward with, with, we're moving forward with, we're, well, we're continuing her, her and it's, it's our plan, but it's really like her keeping me in line. So you just [00:26:00] always, you never wanna shut down that line of communication. And it does take a lot of effort, but I. , because if you're always saying no to somebody's idea, like eventually you're gonna start bringing ideas to the table.

[00:26:10] But if you can validate a person's idea, even if you don't, even if that's not the idea you move forward with, if you validate it as a, as a good idea, and, and then if you tell them why you're choosing your own, you're choosing the path that you chose over their idea. Most people respect that. Most people, like if you, it's, it's, it's okay to say no.

[00:26:38] I think sometimes you need to say no, but explain it. And I think especially when you're a leader and you're leading your team explaining why you know you're moving in one direction instead of the direction that they wanted to move in is, is an important thing to. Yeah, definitely. And I think with being a, a great leader, right, there's a, a, a fine line between being a good leader and a great [00:27:00] leader, and I feel like a lot of good leaders pass by because mm-hmm.

[00:27:03] you know, they're, they're liked by a lot of people, disliked by a lot of people. Mm-hmm. . But I feel like in order to be a great leader anywhere, you have to be either loved or hated. Right? Yeah. Because if you. Believe one thing that means you don't believe another thing, right? And you're gonna wrestle some feathers here or there, and some people may not like your mission and your v your vision.

[00:27:21] Mm-hmm. , uh, what quantities, you know, Do would you say are essential for people to not just be a, a good leader and tread the water, but to be a great leader and to have something that, that's really empowering that people can really stand behind despite knowing that, hey, there may be a group of people that may not like what I stand for.

[00:27:40] Mm-hmm. may not like what I'm doing because that's of anything in life. It's always gonna be the haters. Right. Regardless of whatever we do. So like what kind of advice would you give there for the people that they wanna be? , they're kind of scared of like, this person might not like me or might, I might not be viewed the way and the piece, some the people that I loved, they might have seen me differently.

[00:27:55] Mm-hmm. . So what kind of advice would kind of give there? Yeah, I think [00:28:00] that's hard. I, I think knowing, I, I think being yourself is really important, first of all. So that kind of goes back to, to knowing who you are and that, that, that takes some time. I mean, that takes, that's not something that. One day, all of a sudden you're just okay with who you are and you're, you're like, you don't care what a lot of people think of you.

[00:28:21] You know, you, you have people that love you and you have people that hate you. I do think you're right. Like some, some people love, some people think Elon Musk is like the best leader ever, and some people are like, oh, he is just terrifying. Um, so you're, you're right about that lover hate thing. And I, I think that for a leader, you focus.

[00:28:42] I don't think you turn a completely blind eye to what the haters say. You can't let it eat away at your confidence. But sometimes somebody says, sometimes people will say things that you disagree with, but you need to actually hear. So there's a, there's a [00:29:00] little bit of a balance there, but I think in that case, you gotta focus on the people who love you, talk to them because there are more of those types of people out there.

[00:29:08] I'm not for everybody. Um, you're not for everybody. Like there's, but there's enough people who really buy into what I'm saying or what you're saying to, to have us be elevated to a leadership, a leadership role. So I think it's really important to like, focus on the people who really support you. Not totally turning a, a blind eye to people who hate on you, but not, but trying to not let you let that eat away at your confidence either.

[00:29:36] Because sometimes some of the best ideas come out of those that hate. I mean, it's funny how sometimes the, the, the, the best things come out. Some of the worst situations sometimes I've had that experience in life. It's an interesting, it's just an interesting thing to kind of sit back and look out once you, once you realize it.

[00:29:53] But, but I always, I also think that one of the best things you can do, and one of the biggest lessons I think I've ever learned is [00:30:00] that the best bet you can make is to bet on yourself. You are, I think, the best investment you can make. So remember that too. So if you really believe in something, like I'm very passionate about business owner.

[00:30:14] I'm gonna double down on that all day long because I really believe that business owners have a lot more power than they think they have collectively in this, in this country. And I'm excited to kind of see how, how I can be of impact there and how I can be, how I can facilitate that in the next 10 years.

[00:30:32] So I, I think betting on yourself is also something that you have to do, like when you're either loved or hated, like focus on the people who love you. Focus on that like, Keep, keep, don't, they'll turn a blind eye to the haters, but don't, that's not where you get, that's not where you get your, your love.

[00:30:49] You've focused on the people who really, really support you because there's, there's always more of 'em out there. And talk to him, talk their language. You know, it's Gary V. He, whether you [00:31:00] love him or hate him, he's a great example of somebody who's like, this is who I am, this is who I'm gonna be, and you, you either love me or hate me.

[00:31:06] He's, I don't know. He's recently started talking about how he has a lot of compassion for the haters, which is very interesting. I mean, I think that's, but I think that's a really good. Strategy to take is just to realize like, man, if somebody's hating on me, that hard one, you're probably doing something right.

[00:31:21] If you, if you're getting that much attention to somebody's hating on you pretty hard, you're doing something right. But two, like have empathy for that person and realize, like, don't, try not to take it personally. Don't let it eat away at your confidence. I think that's really an important thing to remember.

[00:31:36] Yeah. And so mentioned focusing on the people you love, what are the, you know, what doing that it, it can sometimes lead into a road where a lot of people like that, that dopamine hit of, you know mm-hmm. just getting that not only yes men, but when you have people that you know are so supportive mm-hmm.

[00:31:51] for you, and that's kind of all you hear. Mm-hmm. . So people tend to black out the entire other side because they're with these people that could deport them. Mm-hmm. . And [00:32:00] sometime that could lead into unhealthy habit where it. Them getting their ego stroked. Yep. How can one stay stray away from that? So they make sure that they stay good leaders and not just doing it because of the feel good hormones.

[00:32:12] So first of all, make it, make sure you feel like you're in a safe space and make sure the other, the other people you surround yourself feel like they're safe with you and they can say they can openly disagree with you. I think that that's, Really important. So, and, and the way you you do that is you listen, you don't react.

[00:32:33] You listen when they disagree with you. And then the other thing is make sure you have people around you who. Are gonna disagree with you. Make sure you have people around you who don't see everything the same way that you see it. I do. The way I do that in I, the way I do that in business is I have a couple of assessments that tell me that I have people who work for me who have different value systems.

[00:32:52] I have people who work for me who value money more than I do, or value leadership, maybe less than I do. [00:33:00] And I think it's important to have different perspectives. Always, always, always. As often as you. And my group of friends, I make sure that I'm surrounded by people who have different perspectives. I mean, if you lined up my, my closest friends on a piece of paper, you would never guess that I'm friends with some of the people I'm friends with because we are polar opposites in terms of politics and religion and all of that.

[00:33:27] And yet we can sit down and have, have a drink and a, a really educated discuss. Where we may not agree with each other on a certain topic, but we both walk away better educated on the other, the other, the other side's perspective. I think we, we are really, really, one thing I think about just in general in this country is we've lost, we've lost the art of disagreement, not debate.

[00:33:53] It's not even the art of debating, it's the art of being able to disagree with somebody, but. [00:34:00] Not think that makes that person wrong, that makes them wrong. It doesn't make you right or them wrong. You just believe two different things. And I think that we have lost that line of thinking, and I think that that is such a critical skill to have, especially for leaders.

[00:34:16] It doesn't mean somebody's right or somebody's wrong, it just means there's two different belief systems. And the sooner you can honor the fact that there's two different belief systems, whether you're talking about a value or. Political debate or anything along those lines when you, when you can just turn off the judgment and actually listen.

[00:34:38] That's when some of the biggest movements and impacts and some of the best things that have happened. Um, like big picture for the country. Little, tiny little picture for me. That's what some of the biggest breakthroughs happen, so, That is something that I also think is really important for leadership and I think I lost the thread of like what the question you [00:35:00] actually No worries asked.

[00:35:00] Was there John? But that's, I think it's really important to, when people disagree, it's okay to have those disagreements. I think it makes us all better people for it as long as we know how to actually disagree. Yeah, definitely. And that's a very, very powerful thing to say because I agree with you a hundred percent on that.

[00:35:16] People have gotten too sensitive, I feel. Mm-hmm. people have gotten too soft. People have, are trying to re. going against the general opinion and it's like mm-hmm. that art of disagreement. Right. That art of not thinking, because it's the saying. Right. The more, the more you realize how much you don't actually know.

[00:35:33] Yeah. And I feel like that that's more so with wisdom and a lot of people, you know, value, empirical knowledge over wisdom. Mm-hmm. and they think that because they've read something and they have the stats or they have whatever that, and I mean, of course it's gonna validate it to some extent, but as you said, if we have two different belief points, it, it's okay to be like, Hey, you see.

[00:35:51] Here's why you see this, I see this. Here's why I see this. Mm-hmm. and have that educated discussion as you were saying. And you know, yeah. There's a [00:36:00] quote that goes something along the lines that God gave us two ears and one mouth for a reason. And I feel like listening is a law skill as well. So what skill?

[00:36:06] I feel like that's one of the most important things, whereas a leader, because a lot of the times a leader, you have to tip back a lot of the times. Mm-hmm. and write. So what advice would you give a as to listening so that people can evolve into a better. Yeah, and this is something I struggle with too. I mean, it's, it's, there's, there's two things I try to do.

[00:36:27] I'm working on the, the pause, like the really long, just being comfortable with their being quiet space. Just, yeah. And you and I as podcasters, like, we don't do that, right? Like, that's, that's not what we're trying to do. But I think, I think I'm, I'm really trying to work on the pause. I think that that's really important.

[00:36:49] The other thing I would say that goes, that goes along the same lines is ask more questions and don't answer the questions you ask. So, [00:37:00] for example, if you have an, if you have an employee or, or, or, or if you know you have a, a nephew or a child or a, a partner or a parent who comes to you with a question, ask them a question back.

[00:37:15] Ask them, well, what do you. What would you do or what would you like to do? Or what, what is your opinion? Sometimes I know people just want a yes or no, like just tell me what to do. Answer. And hopefully they'll, they can tell you that, but especially when you are trying to help other people grow. I, I firmly believe in letting the person, letting the person, there's, there's really no other way to say this, but struggle a little bit to find the answer.

[00:37:42] Letting the person tell you what they think. I, for the longest time would say, well, in, in my social media agency, I would say, well do this and then do this, and then do this. But after a while I was like, I was just setting up this culture where everybody was always coming to me with every question. And so I just [00:38:00] started asking them, what would you do?

[00:38:01] Well, what, what do you think we should do? And then if they asked me a question, I would say, okay, well, okay, and then let's take it another step and let's go a little bit further. What's the next step here? And what's, I think that, and then you just listen. So I think that listening. Is one, being okay with silence.

[00:38:17] Uh, that's a skill. And then two, not rushing to solve the problem in, in most scenario, in most scenarios. I think sometimes, yes, you need to answer a question directly. You can't just like always kind of divert the the, and turn it back around on them. But if you're, if you're really trying, if the person knows the answer, one thing that I.

[00:38:40] Pretty much require of my people is when they come to me with a question, bring me a solution too. Like bring me maybe three solutions and then, then I'll help you pick one of those. But don't, but please don't just come to me with an with a question that I know you can't answer. Because if you do, I'm gonna say, well, what do you think we should do?

[00:38:58] Like, so people who [00:39:00] work with me, they know that's coming, so they come prepared usually, but when they don't, like, I always ask, I almost always ask that question, not every single time, but I think those two things can really help you be a better listener in general. Amazing. Phil, just from you sharing your personal stories and what you've learned through all your years of business exp experience, we kind of got an idea.

[00:39:20] you know, the importance is having that mission that your values mm-hmm. and your vision mm-hmm. so that you, you could become a leader. And the difference of knowing and having that awareness to know when's the right time to wear the leadership hat, when's the right time to wear the manager hat mm-hmm.

[00:39:34] And to then, once we get that going to then figure out how do we train our people mm-hmm. our, our crowd, our audience, our family, friends to buy in, our employees to buy into what we have going. So when we set sale, it's not an empty. . And then you talked about as long as some, some skills and tool sets, tool sets that we need to have equipped so that we could be, have, become a good leader.

[00:39:55] Mm-hmm. . So, um, now if people wanted to get more information on leadership [00:40:00] and being a great business owner mm-hmm. , um, where could we find you at? Where could we connect with you more so that we could get some more help on this topic? Yeah, so you can go to my website. It is v julie b.com and that is my last name is spelled b e e, like a bumblebee.

[00:40:16] So these julie b.com. My podcasts are out there. My podcast is actually called, they don't teach this in business school, so. That's a, it's on all the podcasting platforms, so you can search that as well. I would say, you know, sign up for my email list and you can do that on my website because I send one email a week and it usually has my podcast information in it, and just some ideas from me.

[00:40:38] And you can unsubscribe at any time, obviously. But that's probably like the best way to keep, keep in touch with me. And all of my social channels are the Julie B. So you can find me out there on Instagram, TikTok, LinkedIn, I'm out there. Just connect with me because yeah, we're ha I'm having this conversation, these conversations regularly, and I, I'm really excited to see where all this goes.[00:41:00]

[00:41:00] Amazing. So now it's time for our final four question. The. That we ask every guest that make an appearance on this show. So without further ado, question number one. What is the most impactful lesson that you learned in life? I'm telling you I said it earlier, but bet on yourself. You're the best bet you can make.

[00:41:16] So invest in yourself. What is the most admirable trait you could find in a person? Empathy. If you had to change someone's life, one book, which book would you recommend? I would say, I'm looking at my bookshelf right now. I think start with why that one For sure. What is the legacy that you're trying to leave behind?

[00:41:40] Hmm. I am trying to leave behind a better path for business ownership. Amazing. Julie, what. Julie, it was a pleasure and an honor to have you on the show. I'm glad I was able to pick your brain a little bit, get to hear more about your story, get to hear what you've learned about leadership and the difference between being a great leader [00:42:00]and being a good leader, and then the difference between just being a leader in general and managing, which a lot of people tend to get carried away and end up creating a job for themselves.

[00:42:08] The biggest thing that entrepreneurs find themselves getting is they, they, they leave to start their own business just. Trapped in their own business and never be able to break free until one day, either end up going broke and hating enough to go back to regular corporate life. Right. And so I, I, I appreciate you taking the time today to really come on and have this conversation.

[00:42:28] That is all for today's episode. Thank you guys so much for supporting. Thank you guys so much for tuning in. I just locked in literally today when I'm recording this. Another amazing guest for this year, so stay tuned. I'm bringing a bunch of fire guests this year. This is definitely going to be our year, guys.

[00:42:42] Keep on showing love, keep on supporting. Again, I'm your host, John Mendez. I'll see you guys in the next episode.