Your Focus Will Determine Your Success

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Hey, welcome to SelfTalk. It's me, Dr. Ray Self. I appreciate all you guys who’ve been listening to my show for so long. I'm trying to do something interesting each week, something that I believe the Holy Spirit has led me to say or do. So, I hope you enjoy this show. I hope it means a lot to you. Don't forget to check out the website for the show, icmcollege.org/selftalk. icmcollege.org/selftalk. That takes you to the website for the show. You can download over 200 episodes. You can subscribe, give us a review. All that helps us reach more people. Thank you so much for being a part of today's show. Today I'm going to be talking about your mind and the power of your mind and how your mind is the key to personal success. Amen. Amen.

All right, here we go. Episode 241. Can you believe it? That's a lot of episodes. Thank you so much. Let's have a word of prayer. Heavenly Father, I thank you for your truth. I thank you for your Holy Spirit. I thank you, Father, for what you've given us, the wisdom you've given us in your word, Father, and help me, Father, to convey that wisdom today to everyone listening to this show. 

So, there's a scripture that I like to share with you. It's a very common scripture, but very important scripture. “For the mind set on the flesh is death, but the mind set on the Holy Spirit is life and peace.” So we have a commandment to set our mind on the Holy Spirit. Because if we do not do that, it's dead. One way you can tell in your life if something is of God or not of God, anything that is of God is going to feel alive. If there's life in it, it's most likely from God. If it feels dead or dry, boring, uninteresting, it's just flesh. It's just flesh. But our mind is the key. One thing I've always said in counseling, and I want you to understand this, what you focus on will control you. For instance, if you are focusing, let's say you've got, and I know this has happened to a lot of you, maybe a friend says something that really hurt your feelings. They said something that came across wrong, and it just struck you very, very hard, and you haven't talked to them about it, but you feel the pain, you feel rejected, or you feel offended. And this is in your mind. And what we tend to do is we replay what they said over and over again, or we're replaying what we're going to respond with, or how we're going to talk to them, what we're going to say to them next time we talk to them. And this goes over and over and over in our mind. 

I've had issues in marriage and issues in finances and issues in ministry, and it gets into my mind, and I replay it over and over and over. And so what's happening when we have an issue or a problem or an offense, as we replay this in our mind, it begins to control our life. It takes control over us. On a lighter note, if you've ever watched a good movie and you're really tuned into that movie, you don't want to be interrupted because that movie has your focus and has your control. What you focus on will control you. So we can focus on an issue. We can focus on a problem. We can focus on an offense. We can focus on uh, something that is negative. Or we can do what the Bible tells us to do, which is to focus on what is pure, what is lovely, what is of good report. Our focus has a tremendous ability to influence our life. 

Now, when Paul said the mind set, “the mind set on flesh is death, the mind set on the Holy Spirit is life,” what God wants from us is to focus on Him and the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit is around all the time, and He's leading us all the time, and He's directing us all the time. He's talking to us all the time. The problem is our focus is on so many other things, and what we focus on controls us. If you've ever, again, talking about other people, I mean, so many times we have issues with other people. You know, it's an offense. It's uh, somebody we’re missing or some, something that said that, that, maybe an argument, and maybe you're having marriage struggles. Maybe you're having problems with a teenager. Can you imagine that? And so, you're focused on that teenager, or you're focused on your spouse, and you're focused on that problem, and the problem and that person begins to control you. Uh, maybe a pastor says something that really offended you, or maybe something he didn't do that offended you, and you start focusing on that offense, and the offense begins to take over your life because what you're focusing on controls you. When you're watching that good movie, the movie is controlling you. Okay? And maybe it's good and that',s that's great. And maybe you're focused like me. I love, I love football. I love– especially college football. This is my thing. I'm a sports guy, and I focus on my teams, and during that game, I'm being controlled by that game. 

But God is a jealous God, and He wants our attention. When we have a relationship with someone, it's your wife. It's your best friend, your children. What do you want? You want their attention. You want their focus. I want my wife's attention. I mean, she wants my attention. She wants my focus. God wants your focus because He knows this principle. I'm telling you, your focus, what you're focusing on, is controlling you. But if our focus is on the Holy Spirit, the Holy Spirit has control over our life. If our focus is on natural things, and the Bible talks about flesh, that's just the everyday natural things, then we're be, being controlled by that. God wants control over our life. And the cool thing, what the Apostle Paul is telling us in Romans is, chapter 8, is as we concentrate and give more attention to the Holy Spirit, then we have peace in our life. And I don't know, I don't know about you, but I love peace. I love it when the stress is gone, and I can just relax and enjoy life. And that's what the focus of the Holy Spirit does because whatever you're focusing on controls you. 

So if you're focusing on that problem child, they're controlling you. If your focus and attention is on the person who hurts your feelings, that person is controlling you. The same principle applies to unforgiveness. When you focus on, your focus is on somebody who hurts your feelings or somebody who says something to you, could have been years ago, that person has total control over you. Then, if you have unforgiveness and bitterness in your heart toward them, they really have control over you. They have so much control over you that you're actually tied to them with a ball and chain. You are linked to them. That's why, and I could do a whole show on forgiveness, when you forgive someone, what you're saying is, "I'm letting it go. What you did was wrong. I don't appreciate it. I don't like it. But I am cutting it off. I am turning you over to the Lord. I'm going to let you face your own consequences. I am letting go." That's forgiveness. That's forgiveness. And then you become free because now, instead of your focus being on what they said and what they did, you have made a conscious choice to let it go and focus on something else. Because you see, unforgiveness doesn't hurt the person that you're, you know, you're, you're bitter toward. It hurts you. It's like uh, unforgiveness, somebody said, is like you're drinking poison and expect the other person to die. It just doesn't work that way. But the key principle here, again, unforgiveness, mental focus, controls you. 

And try this. I mean, try to focus on things that are good. Focus on your blessings. Focus on what the voice of the Lord... Focus on the incredible beauty around you. The incredible beauty. I mean, how can we not say that, that there is no creator when we just look outside? Right now, I can look into my yard. I'm very blessed. I live in Winter Park, Florida. I have a pool, and I have a lot of landscaping and flowers all around the pool. It is beautiful. And when I focus on that, it has control over me because the focus of your mind controls your life. Now, you can focus on a problem and an issue and, and they need some focus. I get it. But the more you focus on it, the more control it has over you. Let me say something, this– Let me explain it this way. Problems and negativity bring their own focus. Issues, problems, negativity bring their own focus. What we don't have enough focus on is our blessings. What the Lord is telling us is the beauty around us, the incredible life that we've been given. Instead of focusing on that, we have a tendency as human beings to bring our focus into to, to problems, to issues, to negative stuff, to offenses, to these people that have hurt us, to a spouses not acting like they should, to all these kind of things, and this begins to control our life. Again, because the principle of what you focus on will control you. You can make a choice right now. Listen to me. You can make a choice to focus on whatever you want to focus on. Right now. You can decide you can focus on what I'm saying. You can focus on something else. Your focus, your mental attention, is a choice. And you can choose to continue to focus on the problems. Continue to focus on the issues– 

Now listen, I'm not saying you should ignore them. What I am saying is you should not let them consume your mind. Our mind should be consumed with what is good, what is positive, what the Lord is saying to us, how the Holy Spirit is directing us. When we get our mental focus in the right direction, it has a tremendous impact in our life because God wants to be in control of us. And when our focus is on God, on Jesus, on the Holy Spirit, on His word, on His presence, and our focus is on Him, there is life and peace. Have you ever– I can give you a really beautiful example of this. If you've, if you're blessed to go to a church that has great praise and worship, and you're at church and the praise and worship is going on and you are focused on that, the worship, the lyrics, the music, and you're singing to the Lord, have you not noticed there's an incredible feeling of peace? If you're in a situation where there is the anointing of the Holy Spirit, like during praise and worship or an anointed church service, an anointed word being delivered, there's always peace around it. Because when we focus on and give our mental attention and our energy toward the Holy Spirit and toward what is pure and lovely and of good report, as Paul wrote, when we do these things, these things begin to control our life and our life improves. If we continue to focus on the negative, the issues, the problems, the offense, all the other people, our life gets dry. Our life gets heavy, and instead of dealing with problems, we have problems controlling us. Yes, we have to deal with problems. Yes, we have to deal with things that come up, but I don't want to be controlled by it. I just want to deal with it and get back to what is good and pure and lovely because I know my mind, my mind, focus of my mind, will control my life. It will control my life. 

And it's interesting, you know, another silly example, but a strong example. I like to play golf. If any of you have ever played golf, when you're playing golf, it requires a lot of focus. And as I'm focused on playing golf and hitting that golf ball, guess what's controlling me? Guess what I'm consumed by? I'm consumed by a ridiculous, silly game. But it really does control my life. And I am totally consumed and worried about where is my golf, golf ball going? Why did I hit such a bad shot? What could I do to hit a better shot? You know, how does it, where, what direction does this putt break? What is my score? I can't believe I just made a bogey. Oh my goodness gracious. When will I ever learn how to play this game? And golf consumes me. And it's okay sometimes to focus on things that are not important. But our primary focus, if our primary focus is on the good, the beautiful, the lovely, the things of God, what the Holy Spirit is telling you, and you're focused on Him, you will have a life of peace. And who doesn't want a life of peace? Paul said, "The mind set on the Spirit,” the Holy Spirit, “is peace." I love peace. I love to feel fulfilled. I love to feel content. And you get that through your mental focus. Do not let problems consume you, and other people control you. Be controlled by the Holy Spirit. Be controlled. What your mind gives attention to and focuses on will control you. And our God's a jealous God, and He wants your attention. Amen. 

I hope this has been a blessing to you. I'm not going to do a long show today, but remember, whatever you focus on, what has your attention controls you. Give attention, you know, to the issues just to take care of them, but don't be consumed by them. Don't be consumed by other people. Be consumed by what is good, what is pure, what is lovely. Be consumed by the Holy Spirit. Amen. Because it is life. It is life more abundantly, and it is peace, and it is good for you. Amen. Amen. God bless you. This is Dr. Ray. Thank you so much for listening, and as we close the show, please don't forget to subscribe on our website, icmcollege.org/selftalk. Also, tell some friends about this show. We really want to increase our downloads. That's up to you. If you'd like to make a donation to help me continue this, that'd be great. Uh, icmcollege.org/donate. And we have several funds available. I appreciate you so much for being a part of Self Talk. This is your host, me, Dr. Ray Self himself. No more self- puns. I don't want to be too self-aware. Oh, I got to go, take a selfie. I'm sorry, folks. I couldn't help it. God bless you.