Rewiring Trauma and Purpose

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Hello and welcome to the Call Her Cat podcast, where we share honest stories

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of resilience and recovery.

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I'm Kat York, and my mission is to hold a supportive, honest space for candid

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discussions on addiction, healing, and breaking the mold.

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Whether you are exploring sobriety, navigating family cycles,

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or working toward finding self-love and empowerment, these

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conversations are for you let's connect

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heal and learn what it means to truly redefine

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your story as a gentle reminder before

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i introduce our guest ashley dillard the call her cat podcast is for informational

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purposes only the views expressed by the host and the guests are their own personal

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opinions and do not constitute professional advice please consult of a licensed

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professional for any medical,

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legal, or psychological concerns.

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Now let me introduce you to our wonderful guest, Ashley Dillard.

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Ashley is a licensed professional counselor and a certified clinical and transpersonal

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hypnotherapist who spent nearly a decade as a firefighter and paramedic before

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answering her deep calling.

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She describes her own journey as the great dismantling, letting go of who she

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thought she had to become to be who she truly is. The journey lives in her work.

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With 5,000 plus hours of experience and advanced training in clinical hypnosis,

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neurosomatic therapy, and psychedelic assisted therapy, she supports first responders,

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military members, veterans, families, and individuals ready for meaningful change.

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She practices in Loveland, Colorado and virtually.

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Ashley offers a 30-minute complimentary session, which you can learn more about

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from her website, and the link to schedule that consultation will be in the show notes.

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Ashley also hosts her own podcast, Sit Around the Fire, which is a podcast for

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first responders, military members, family seeking healing, growth, and connection.

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That's enough of me talking let's let's

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talk to Ashley Ashley thank you for joining me today appreciate

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you absolutely thank you for having

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me Kat I'm really honored and blessed to be with you today

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did I miss anything did you want to add anything to your bio I don't think so

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I think you got it all it's always interesting hearing it read back to yourself

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yeah but no it sounds like you've got the full encompassing view you have a

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pretty pretty unique journey.

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As a firefighter and as a paramedic, what led you to want to become a first responder like that?

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Yeah, I wasn't one of those people that was grandfathered in per se, like where,

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you know, my grandfather was a police officer and then therefore it kind of

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goes down the line, like you see in a lot of families.

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Mine was very spontaneous and

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organic so I initially I've always

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been drawn into the medical field and initially

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after you know graduating my plan

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was nursing school which I started off into but then decided kind of wasn't

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exactly the right fit or what I was looking for and through getting to work

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with some of the local fire departments in helping their physical fitness and things like that,

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I got immersed into the world of fire and EMS.

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And that was really like the

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door opening for me of this

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is a really stinking cool job where it's

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definitely not the same job day to day you're kind

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of always having to think on your feet like different

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scenarios coming up and you get such a

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cool blend of you know everything from

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you know opening breaking doors open

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and fighting fires to like restarting people's hearts and you know doing CPR

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delivering babies or that kind of thing it's such a diverse thing that that's

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what really drew me into it as I knew I've never been traditional in my whole entire life.

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And so I wanted something that was definitely outside the box and definitely

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challenging. And it really was just such an awesome, really, really fun career.

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Because that's not only, I imagine, physically draining and taxing,

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but emotionally as well.

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Yeah, I think it, I mean, they all, they talk about it, right?

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And you're, you're new and you're, you kind of have that like starry eyed approach to everything.

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And you hear some people talk about the emotional toll and what ends up happening.

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But I think you kind of put on rose-colored glasses in a way where you don't

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believe it or you don't see it or you don't pay attention to it.

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And for me, the real look in the mirror on the emotional toll didn't happen

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until the very end of my career and even further when I got out of it,

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when I wasn't online anymore.

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I didn't really realize the profound impact all around that this job had on

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me in multiple different ways,

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from the mental side to the physical side to the relational side,

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kind of the whole expanse of it.

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I didn't really realize, honestly, until I was more or less out of it or close to being out of it.

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Was there one defining experience, or was it more like a cumulative effect for you?

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You know, it was really very cumulative for me.

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I mean, there was, of course, everybody has what we call like the Book of the

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Dead, where there's, you know, some really terrible calls and things that had happened.

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But for me, it was just a collection over time.

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So years worth of stuff piling up with a lot of those kind of calls,

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but then also a lot of very mundane calls as well, too, or running on the same, you know.

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Individual six or seven times in a 48 hour rotation or feeling just kind of

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that deep burnout and fatigue of like, are we actually making a difference here?

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Like is this and so I think it for

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me was very very cumulative over time and

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it was very a slow burn as I

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like to call it towards when I got toward the end of my career I actually had

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a lieutenant who asked me like straight up he's like if something doesn't change

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he's like you're not gonna make it like you're not like he could see how burned

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out I was that and just in the way that I talked, the way that I responded.

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He was just like, yeah, you're very, very burned out. And he wasn't wrong at all.

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But yeah, it was just that collection over time in the midst of all the other,

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you know, bigger, more traumatic calls that come up.

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What was that moment like for you when he came up to you and.

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And said that to you? I knew he wasn't wrong.

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So I think it probably the peak of frustration is that, you know,

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like this is, this is what I signed up for. This is what I want to do.

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Still loving aspects of the job, but just being so incredibly burned out that

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I didn't want to be there.

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Like I, I wouldn't sleep good the night before I went to work.

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Obviously like sleep is a gamble when you're

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there anyways to just

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like feeling this like heavy heavy weight

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of even being there and then

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him kind of calling it out was just that reality

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check for me of like you're right either this will

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continue to be the next 10 years till I can

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fully retire from it I'll just kind of become more and more salty like many

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many people do or I have to like choose to advocate for myself and make myself

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a priority and make a different decision moving forward.

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Do they have a lot of resources available for first responders,

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like counselors or mental health professionals?

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They do, and it's gotten much better, I think, over, and now,

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I think, in the last five, gosh, since I've been out of it, I said the last five years or so,

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man, stuff has really escalated in terms of resources and different kinds of

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modalities of therapy that are available.

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But for me, I struggled, honestly, with finding a good therapist, a good clinician.

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I think it's, as a first responder,

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you just have a different kind of personality anyways,

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and you have this little bit of that dark-sided humor to you that can be really

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hard to find the right person that understands where you're coming from.

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Or knows how to sit with some of the stuff that we go through.

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And so I had a hard time finding that in somebody. I got lucky a couple of times,

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and hypnosis was one of the things that helped me personally a lot.

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But yeah, it's hard to find that culturally competent, relevant person,

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but it is getting better and better.

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And there are a lot of programs showing up now too to help people as well,

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grants and different funding and things like that.

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But there's still a huge gap, I think. Yeah.

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When you made the pivot to being a counselor, to being a hypnotherapist,

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what was that journey like for you from going from such a fast-paced work to

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maybe a slower, more spacious work, I guess? Yeah.

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It was very difficult. It took me several months to kind of get to make the decision.

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And I was still

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in school while I was still online so

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I was finishing my master's degree and doing my

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internship and practicum and so I was already

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getting immersed into the world of

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counseling while I was still online as a firefighter which

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was a very difficult like two balls to juggle at one time because you never

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really get a break so I knew that that wasn't going to be very sustainable in

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the long run to try to do both full-time and still take care of myself.

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But I wrestled with the decision to leave for a while and had many,

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many conversations and really had to sit with,

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am I okay letting this chapter go and closing this season of my life?

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Because they worked really, really hard to get the spot that I did. And it...

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Back in the day, I think it's changed a little bit now, too,

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but it's still not easy to get a job in fire, particularly, and EMS,

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and as a female as well, too.

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It just is a lot to get there, and it's a lot of training and a lot of everything.

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And so I had a lot of people that were very harsh and critical saying that I

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was throwing away everything and how could I make this decision.

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But I knew like down in my gut and in my heart

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like I I had to like I had to for myself I had to for my relationship I had

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to for my family like everything about it was there were no questions in my

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mind it was just a difficult transition of letting go and that's taken part of the,

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dismantling right is taking time to let go of

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that identity that I had held on to for

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so long and moving into the

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work I do now I would say it's still equally as

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intense but much different so now

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it's sitting with people in

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whatever they're going through or whatever's coming up and especially in the

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kind of work that I do like this isn't the light like having tea version of

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therapy this is the heavy stuff that can be a lot and so I've had to really

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really learn and still learning how to best.

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Take care of myself in the midst of that and give

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people that space but it really is such an

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honor and a blessing to be able to do this kind

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of work now and have the background that

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I do to just be there with people as they're navigating this stuff or they're

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having their own dismantling and so yeah I wouldn't trade it for anything it's

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all played exactly as it needed to in the journey and every single step has led to where I am now.

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And I'm really just grateful to do the work.

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It's interesting that, you know, when you made this pivot, people were,

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you know, focused on what you were losing, like career-wise.

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Do you feel that maybe they were missing or didn't see what it was costing you,

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like emotionally and mentally and physically?

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Yes. And I think kind of alluding to what I was talking about earlier is when

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you're in it, you don't really know anything differently.

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So this whole, the whole mentality around, you know,

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being ultimate self-sacrificing, you know, your physical health,

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maybe not being the best, your emotional health, your relationships,

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like all of these things, substance use, all of that becomes very normalized.

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And so you don't it's one of those things I compare it

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to like you don't know you're sick when you're around

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a bunch of sick people and so that every

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everything of that that suffering is very like

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it's normal for the culture so you don't know anything different so

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then making the decision to leave in a

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lot of people's eyes was seeing like me throwing away

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this opportunity or the expectation

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that you work you know 20 to 30 years to retire that's kind of the unspoken

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expectation that you're if you're not doing that then like you're out of the

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norm kind of thing yeah having been out of.

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Out of that field for a while now how does your how does your system feel like

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how does your mind feel versus like when you were right in the trenches being

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a first responder it's been,

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very interesting and it's been um and I laugh because it's still like a journey,

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that's kind of where the the dismantling came

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into place of how how do

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you get used to a different kind

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of life essentially and working with

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your nervous system and your body in another

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element of where it's not constant fight or

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flight or survival all the time to where

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I mean I'm I'm still a

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work in progress and still working on even feeling safe

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enough to rest like it's just it's so deeply wired into our nervous systems

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when we're stuck in those survival pattern so long that you know you can sit

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there and want to rest want to take a nap so badly but you just cannot and so

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still like giving myself.

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Grace and compassion and still working with my

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nervous system to create that new default

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mode and like sense of safety to be able

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to rest or to be able to come out of that fight or

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flight but I've noticed a lot of big changes

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in myself of even watch because

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I loved all the I mean as much blood and

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guts I would take it all like nothing ever fazed me

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when I was online and then now days watching

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like even watching the basketball game

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the other night because of course I'm a Nuggets fan and watching

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them in Minnesota and when Anthony

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Edwards hyper extended his knee and they showed it

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I was just like oh like a whole body like

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visceral response and I'm so grateful

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for that because I know like my brain is

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rewiring to what's actually normal and

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actually sensitized back into

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being impacted by those things and not that just

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you know can continuous repetition

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of exposure over time that desensitizes your

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brain to that kind of stuff so that's a big that's a big one that I've noticed

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in myself is just I really don't enjoy watching stuff that's highly like gory

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or a lot of that kind of thing it does definitely impact me which is just so

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different than the way it used to be.

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Yeah. I think a lot of us don't even understand all that first responders see on a day-to-day basis.

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Because we'll see it in movies or we'll have an experience ourselves,

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but it's not 10, 12 hours a day. It's not seven days a week.

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And with what first responders do,

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I can only imagine that desensitization is almost like a protective layer that

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your mind just has to, like a wallet has to put up.

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When you're working with someone who has seen the things that you've seen and

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gone through, some of which you've gone through, where do you begin with even,

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like, what's the first step in working with someone who's a first responder or military?

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The beginning always starts with

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the relationship is for one

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you we have to be able to sit with one another and

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trust one another to go to these places that

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most of us have shoved down and packed

00:19:31.012 --> 00:19:34.272
away for a very long time I hear

00:19:34.272 --> 00:19:37.112
the word compartmentalized like more than I could

00:19:37.112 --> 00:19:40.412
even count in my office and so

00:19:40.412 --> 00:19:44.412
that it really has to start with the relationship especially

00:19:44.412 --> 00:19:47.732
I mean with everybody but especially

00:19:47.732 --> 00:19:51.512
with military folks too is because they've

00:19:51.512 --> 00:19:54.652
already had some exposure to therapy in

00:19:54.652 --> 00:19:58.072
some form or fashion and it's not always been great

00:19:58.072 --> 00:20:01.452
for them like sometimes they don't get a

00:20:01.452 --> 00:20:04.312
lot of traction or they get a lot of help or they just get

00:20:04.312 --> 00:20:10.152
this huge prescription list thrown at them and so they don't have a lot of trust

00:20:10.152 --> 00:20:16.512
in therapy or trust in the process and so that's where my work begins is just

00:20:16.512 --> 00:20:22.192
building rapport and starting with the relationship first is like we have to create that safety.

00:20:23.078 --> 00:20:25.858
Your nervous system your body has to start to feel

00:20:25.858 --> 00:20:28.698
that safety too so that it will allow you

00:20:28.698 --> 00:20:31.578
to go to the places that you need to go so that

00:20:31.578 --> 00:20:34.538
you can get the work done the transformation the

00:20:34.538 --> 00:20:37.478
healing that you want to because it's a lot i

00:20:37.478 --> 00:20:40.458
i mean i would feel uncomfortable too

00:20:40.458 --> 00:20:43.378
like just showing up to somebody's random office and

00:20:43.378 --> 00:20:46.418
then be like okay like let's go to the the

00:20:46.418 --> 00:20:50.678
depths of everything let's go see all the shadows it's

00:20:50.678 --> 00:20:53.858
pacing and leading over time to get there

00:20:53.858 --> 00:20:56.758
and that's why I always say like you can't rush this

00:20:56.758 --> 00:20:59.778
process by any means because sometimes

00:20:59.778 --> 00:21:02.618
people need to just sit there and we need to just have like a normal

00:21:02.618 --> 00:21:05.438
conversation first to see that we're both

00:21:05.438 --> 00:21:09.038
human beings and we both have this commonality in

00:21:09.038 --> 00:21:12.658
some form or fashion through life that we've been through stuff

00:21:12.658 --> 00:21:21.458
and that's the key to the work i think is that relationship yeah do you think

00:21:21.458 --> 00:21:30.898
you mentioned it briefly you know being a woman and in these professions adds another layer.

00:21:32.738 --> 00:21:38.038
Complexity do you think it makes it do you think it made it more difficult for you to say,

00:21:38.738 --> 00:21:42.938
you know I need to do something else because women were supposed to nurture

00:21:42.938 --> 00:21:47.158
all the time and care there's not really like we're not supposed to have like

00:21:47.158 --> 00:21:53.218
an off switch or time to step away do you think it made it harder for you to step away being a woman,

00:21:54.136 --> 00:21:58.996
Yes, I think that it was twofold there.

00:21:59.216 --> 00:22:04.436
I had the nurturing piece, that not being able to kind of turn off or feeling,

00:22:04.916 --> 00:22:10.576
trying to manage everybody else's things, being like a caretaker.

00:22:10.736 --> 00:22:12.296
For lack of a better way to say it.

00:22:12.296 --> 00:22:15.476
But also like just

00:22:15.476 --> 00:22:19.456
the probably the more the perceived expectation

00:22:19.456 --> 00:22:23.016
of always living up to a certain standard and

00:22:23.016 --> 00:22:25.736
so as a woman too you

00:22:25.736 --> 00:22:28.736
have to everything is the same across the board

00:22:28.736 --> 00:22:31.916
so all of your physical tests or expectations and

00:22:31.916 --> 00:22:34.976
performance are the same no matter if you're you

00:22:34.976 --> 00:22:37.656
know the ex-NFL player or you're a

00:22:37.656 --> 00:22:40.756
five-foot woman it's all the same and so

00:22:40.756 --> 00:22:43.856
there's always an underlying like pressure

00:22:43.856 --> 00:22:46.736
to performance when it comes to like

00:22:46.736 --> 00:22:49.856
measuring up or doing what you

00:22:49.856 --> 00:22:52.976
need to do and so I think that that

00:22:52.976 --> 00:22:55.916
is a big part of what plays into it

00:22:55.916 --> 00:22:58.736
I think for all females is you just kind of

00:22:58.736 --> 00:23:01.796
always have this low level sense

00:23:01.796 --> 00:23:05.416
of pressure and measuring up and making

00:23:05.416 --> 00:23:08.216
sure you can do everything that you need to.

00:23:08.216 --> 00:23:11.516
Do that adds a level of stress honestly

00:23:11.516 --> 00:23:14.536
I think is just kind of every time you

00:23:14.536 --> 00:23:17.336
are you pull into the parking lot or you're there is

00:23:17.336 --> 00:23:20.236
you just kind of feel that inner turmoil that

00:23:20.236 --> 00:23:23.196
stress all the time and that's what

00:23:23.196 --> 00:23:29.376
I also believe very much impacts us over time is that kind of constant stress

00:23:29.376 --> 00:23:35.276
which leads to inflammation which leads to other issues overall and the female

00:23:35.276 --> 00:23:40.776
body in general is just different as well like our hormones are different.

00:23:41.016 --> 00:23:44.856
The way we respond, like everything is so different.

00:23:45.096 --> 00:23:50.556
It's just a totally different rodeo when it comes to being a woman and being.

00:23:51.642 --> 00:23:56.462
In that kind of environment or in that kind of schedule or that stress demand.

00:23:56.762 --> 00:24:01.902
Not discounting the guys either, but I think I just noticed and I see it a lot

00:24:01.902 --> 00:24:07.782
to how impactful it is on such a global level for females.

00:24:08.502 --> 00:24:09.922
Would you say that.

00:24:10.763 --> 00:24:16.023
More of your clients are men or women, or is it kind of like an equal split?

00:24:16.783 --> 00:24:22.343
I definitely have more males than females, which I laugh at sometimes because

00:24:22.343 --> 00:24:25.343
I'm like, that's just funny. But I'm glad for it too.

00:24:26.103 --> 00:24:33.143
I really get excited when it's a lot of people who have never been to therapy

00:24:33.143 --> 00:24:35.123
before or never tried therapy.

00:24:35.423 --> 00:24:38.803
And I take a pretty straightforward forward approach to things.

00:24:39.283 --> 00:24:45.763
So getting to the roots of what's going on rather than managing a bunch of symptoms.

00:24:46.063 --> 00:24:52.443
And I think that's kind of, if it's just the universe like draws that energy back to me, I don't know.

00:24:53.063 --> 00:24:56.663
But yeah, it's a lot more male dominant,

00:24:56.883 --> 00:25:01.463
but I do have quite a few females as well too, or even spouses too,

00:25:01.663 --> 00:25:05.243
that I work with that come through in

00:25:05.243 --> 00:25:08.483
a huge variety of people because I

00:25:08.483 --> 00:25:12.623
was looking on your website and you offer

00:25:12.623 --> 00:25:15.423
it's not just normal talk therapy that

00:25:15.423 --> 00:25:18.803
you do can you talk a little bit about about that

00:25:18.803 --> 00:25:21.643
yeah so it's kind of

00:25:21.643 --> 00:25:26.983
a term I coined or came up with to try to explain like okay how is this different

00:25:26.983 --> 00:25:32.103
than regular therapy because I am I don't just practice regular therapy but

00:25:32.103 --> 00:25:37.863
I kind of call it integrative psychotherapy so I'm using all of my tools from

00:25:37.863 --> 00:25:40.623
my toolbox when it comes to working with somebody.

00:25:40.943 --> 00:25:46.423
So we do elements of hypnosis. We do neurosomatic work. So working with the

00:25:46.423 --> 00:25:47.683
nervous system in the body.

00:25:47.923 --> 00:25:51.703
We do, you know, and then some of the traditional stuff of, you know,

00:25:51.803 --> 00:25:57.403
working with the mind, like through cognitive behavioral therapy or emotionally

00:25:57.403 --> 00:26:01.523
focused therapy where we're doing some different elements of that.

00:26:01.643 --> 00:26:08.763
And so it's this big synthesis of things coming together because I never liked being put into...

00:26:09.962 --> 00:26:15.062
A formula or a box to say, well, this is how it's going to be done because nobody's

00:26:15.062 --> 00:26:18.842
healing journey is linear and everybody is different.

00:26:18.842 --> 00:26:25.902
So we need different tactics to find what works best for you and come at this

00:26:25.902 --> 00:26:27.742
at all different levels.

00:26:27.762 --> 00:26:32.582
Because I really think one of the big missing links in regular talk therapy

00:26:32.582 --> 00:26:35.902
is the somatic, the nervous system piece of it.

00:26:36.002 --> 00:26:39.042
Because even for myself, I noticed when

00:26:39.042 --> 00:26:42.502
I would make a bunch of big mental changes or

00:26:42.502 --> 00:26:45.982
like really addressing some of these deep limiting core

00:26:45.982 --> 00:26:48.842
beliefs and then the nervous system is like

00:26:48.842 --> 00:26:52.522
what the heck just happened on the other side and

00:26:52.522 --> 00:26:56.222
wanting to go back into old patterns or

00:26:56.222 --> 00:26:59.582
old coping mechanisms because that's been

00:26:59.582 --> 00:27:02.362
survival the whole time and so

00:27:02.362 --> 00:27:05.382
really working with both through the

00:27:05.382 --> 00:27:08.922
whole journey mind and body together so

00:27:08.922 --> 00:27:11.782
that as the big stuff changes the

00:27:11.782 --> 00:27:14.982
nervous system still feels okay and

00:27:14.982 --> 00:27:18.262
still has the resourcing to go along

00:27:18.262 --> 00:27:21.402
with the changes as well because it's it's a huge missing

00:27:21.402 --> 00:27:24.382
piece in my opinion of the work is the nervous

00:27:24.382 --> 00:27:28.102
system the somatic side of things because it

00:27:28.102 --> 00:27:34.122
just you can't deny it it just is it is the way that it is and so my work is

00:27:34.122 --> 00:27:40.022
all inclusive of all the things but it is like the heavier side of work so I'm

00:27:40.022 --> 00:27:45.802
not a symptom manager I don't it drove me crazy like when people would come.

00:27:46.574 --> 00:27:51.234
And every week or every other week, and we're still talking about the same anxiety

00:27:51.234 --> 00:27:54.754
showing up for the same thing. And I'd be like, why are we not getting anywhere?

00:27:55.134 --> 00:28:00.794
And so really finding the roots to things and clearing that out and clear helping,

00:28:01.154 --> 00:28:05.534
again, the nervous system side of things as well is what I really,

00:28:05.654 --> 00:28:08.114
really love to do. That's what my work is centered around.

00:28:08.394 --> 00:28:12.974
So that's, yeah, I'm not like a quote unquote traditional therapist.

00:28:14.414 --> 00:28:19.214
Well, I think you touched on something that's very important because talk therapy

00:28:19.214 --> 00:28:23.694
has its place, but if you come from a place of trauma or fight or flight,

00:28:24.114 --> 00:28:26.554
your nervous system gets so dysregulated.

00:28:27.607 --> 00:28:31.907
That talk therapy seems to just kind of miss the mark sometimes.

00:28:32.347 --> 00:28:36.747
Like how can you talk when your system is so wound up and you have ruminating

00:28:36.747 --> 00:28:38.447
thoughts and you're anxious?

00:28:39.307 --> 00:28:43.327
And can you talk a little bit more about it?

00:28:43.427 --> 00:28:49.847
Because I feel like sometimes people have this view that it's just so deep breathing or just meditation.

00:28:50.167 --> 00:28:56.187
So when you say you're working with a client to rewire their nervous system,

00:28:56.187 --> 00:28:59.347
um what what does that take what

00:28:59.347 --> 00:29:02.827
does that entail first we

00:29:02.827 --> 00:29:06.507
have to look at what the actual behaviors

00:29:06.507 --> 00:29:11.227
are that are showing up that's i think if we were building a roadmap or tracing

00:29:11.227 --> 00:29:16.487
it backwards to see like what's actually showing up from where is most helpful

00:29:16.487 --> 00:29:20.827
it was most helpful for me and i think really helpful for other people to look

00:29:20.827 --> 00:29:25.527
at okay what's the behavior showing up Is it the overthinking?

00:29:25.747 --> 00:29:30.667
Is it the ruminating? Is it that desire to think 10 steps ahead?

00:29:31.347 --> 00:29:35.867
Like kind of like not being present in this moment, but thinking ahead,

00:29:36.247 --> 00:29:38.227
you know, like, what else do I have to do?

00:29:38.527 --> 00:29:42.747
And okay, now we know that we have a behavior in mind.

00:29:42.747 --> 00:29:47.567
We can know that that's coming from that flight nervous system reaction,

00:29:47.567 --> 00:29:50.467
which is that sympathetic foot on

00:29:50.467 --> 00:29:53.507
the gas pedal stress hormones we're looking at

00:29:53.507 --> 00:29:56.407
adrenaline and cortisol pumping through the

00:29:56.407 --> 00:29:59.067
system is what's telling us is that

00:29:59.067 --> 00:30:04.327
the system is never coming down into parasympathetic coming down into regulation

00:30:04.327 --> 00:30:10.247
so it feels like it's in a threat state so now we can take that behavior and

00:30:10.247 --> 00:30:15.987
start to wire it backwards to say okay what's the emotion coming from the behavior

00:30:15.987 --> 00:30:18.667
now is it anxiety is Is it panic?

00:30:20.477 --> 00:30:25.277
Fear, whatever it is. Now let's look at the thoughts that are coming up first

00:30:25.277 --> 00:30:29.357
because a thought always comes before an emotion or a behavior.

00:30:29.617 --> 00:30:35.677
So is the thought actually, you know, like I'm out of control or I'm not doing

00:30:35.677 --> 00:30:40.537
enough or I'm not, nothing ever works out for me. I'm overwhelmed.

00:30:41.097 --> 00:30:44.617
Now we can trace that back even further to the belief.

00:30:44.777 --> 00:30:49.557
So now the belief which that's in the core of the subconscious is telling us,

00:30:49.717 --> 00:30:57.257
I'm not enough, I'm not safe, I'm not lovable, inadequate, I'm insecure, whatever it is.

00:30:57.457 --> 00:31:00.777
And now we have like a whole network to work within.

00:31:01.554 --> 00:31:06.214
So as we address those beliefs through, you know, some of the other modalities

00:31:06.214 --> 00:31:07.674
like hypnosis and things,

00:31:07.914 --> 00:31:13.514
now we can work with the nervous system too to start to create that safety to

00:31:13.514 --> 00:31:18.454
where we use nervous system drills that actually work with specific cranial

00:31:18.454 --> 00:31:21.354
nerves or parts of the brain, parts of the body.

00:31:22.074 --> 00:31:28.034
And it's more, breathing is very, very helpful, but it's more than just regular breathing.

00:31:28.254 --> 00:31:34.794
It's actually very specific kinds of breathing and or constantly testing the

00:31:34.794 --> 00:31:39.194
nervous system to see what responds and what doesn't because we're all different.

00:31:39.454 --> 00:31:44.854
And so I might tell you to do six count breathing and you do it and it actually

00:31:44.854 --> 00:31:49.134
activates your nervous system rather than like down regulating it.

00:31:49.294 --> 00:31:53.674
So in that case, it's not a bad drill or bad way to do things,

00:31:53.934 --> 00:32:00.954
but it's not a drill to bring you back into parasympathetic regulated state. So we need to adjust it.

00:32:01.034 --> 00:32:05.994
We need to work with that's not going to fit your nervous system at this place and time.

00:32:06.274 --> 00:32:10.254
So it's a lot of testing and assessing through the nervous system.

00:32:10.374 --> 00:32:14.754
And we do it in real time, which is so awesome because the nervous system will

00:32:14.754 --> 00:32:16.354
give you immediate feedback.

00:32:16.734 --> 00:32:19.594
And so it's not one of those like take two

00:32:19.594 --> 00:32:22.394
and we'll see how it goes in a week like we

00:32:22.394 --> 00:32:25.714
know then and there like how people feel and we

00:32:25.714 --> 00:32:30.634
connect that into the awareness of the body so what are you feeling in your

00:32:30.634 --> 00:32:36.054
body now when you're experiencing these ruminating overthinking thoughts like

00:32:36.054 --> 00:32:40.654
is it your stomach feels sick do you feel pressure in your chest like do you

00:32:40.654 --> 00:32:42.794
feel a sharpness in the back of your neck.

00:32:43.034 --> 00:32:48.274
Okay, let's go there and see what's coming up out of that spot and then start

00:32:48.274 --> 00:32:50.254
to work with it from there as well.

00:32:50.374 --> 00:32:56.594
So it's a lot of getting people into their body and actually experiencing what

00:32:56.594 --> 00:32:58.714
it is that's coming up rather than just.

00:32:59.475 --> 00:33:04.335
Trying to press the mute button or, you know, like normalizing the symptoms.

00:33:04.475 --> 00:33:08.675
It's getting very, very curious and becoming aware of what's coming up.

00:33:08.935 --> 00:33:13.815
And then we can start to work on it on all the other levels. So I know that's a lie.

00:33:14.275 --> 00:33:19.315
No, no, that's great. I think it's important because like you said,

00:33:19.395 --> 00:33:21.215
it's not talked about enough, like at all.

00:33:21.695 --> 00:33:26.135
You're either, whether it's your primary care or your therapist, it's not talked about.

00:33:27.095 --> 00:33:32.515
Medication has its place, but I think If you don't tackle the nervous system,

00:33:32.795 --> 00:33:35.755
I don't know how much it's going to help you.

00:33:36.690 --> 00:33:43.690
You know, and something that you do that I read a lot about is psychedelic assisted therapy.

00:33:44.250 --> 00:33:50.190
And I was wondering if you could touch on that, because that has the potential to really help people.

00:33:51.970 --> 00:33:54.950
Yeah, so there's so many.

00:33:55.190 --> 00:33:58.990
I mean, there's a lot of different things out there now, and there's a big movement

00:33:58.990 --> 00:34:04.370
towards getting a lot of stuff pushed to the front line so it's accessible for people.

00:34:04.370 --> 00:34:07.150
The way with psychedelics what

00:34:07.150 --> 00:34:10.930
happens is it's basically like a

00:34:10.930 --> 00:34:17.430
big opening of the floodgates essentially of going into a lot of these things

00:34:17.430 --> 00:34:22.850
where it's showing you what's going on or what needs to be addressed and creating

00:34:22.850 --> 00:34:29.970
these massive windows of neuroplasticity and that just means the brain's ability to change,

00:34:30.210 --> 00:34:34.090
which you have neuroplasticity for your entire life.

00:34:34.390 --> 00:34:39.590
So this whole mentality around, well, this is just the way I am, or I'm too old to change,

00:34:39.790 --> 00:34:47.190
that's not correct thinking because the neuroplasticity window literally is

00:34:47.190 --> 00:34:49.750
open until the day your brain is no longer functioning.

00:34:50.170 --> 00:34:54.170
And so you can change at any point in time, but the psychedelics,

00:34:54.170 --> 00:34:59.010
They're very interesting in the way that each of them and different ones have

00:34:59.010 --> 00:35:03.590
certain neuroplasticity windows, and that's just the ability to change.

00:35:03.590 --> 00:35:09.250
So, for example, if somebody is working on no longer using a substance,

00:35:09.470 --> 00:35:13.810
whether it's narcotics or alcohol or whatever.

00:35:14.430 --> 00:35:20.710
These psychedelics can open up these neuroplasticity windows to allow the brain

00:35:20.710 --> 00:35:27.770
to rewire a new network so it's not going to these old ways of doing things, these old methods,

00:35:28.350 --> 00:35:32.330
these old coping strategies, these old patterns, etc.

00:35:32.946 --> 00:35:36.926
And they're all different depending on whether you're looking at ketamine or

00:35:36.926 --> 00:35:41.086
you're looking at psilocybin or now like ibogaine, those kinds of things.

00:35:41.346 --> 00:35:43.326
All the neuroplasticity windows are different.

00:35:43.846 --> 00:35:48.286
The biggest thing with the psychedelics is that it's, and I try to be so clear

00:35:48.286 --> 00:35:50.866
about this with people, is it's not a panacea.

00:35:51.126 --> 00:35:56.026
It's not just like, I'll go do the psychedelic and it'll fix everything for me.

00:35:56.366 --> 00:36:00.766
It's giving you the message you need to go do the work after that.

00:36:00.766 --> 00:36:06.206
And so it does still require you to have to actually do the work on the backside

00:36:06.206 --> 00:36:11.166
of your psychedelics in how do you integrate this into life?

00:36:11.346 --> 00:36:17.466
How do you take these new ways of doing things and like experience stress in

00:36:17.466 --> 00:36:21.706
the world or in your relationships or whatever it is?

00:36:22.006 --> 00:36:28.146
They're really super, super helpful, but they still require a level of work on the other side.

00:36:28.846 --> 00:36:32.466
It's not just you take it and everything is perfect

00:36:32.466 --> 00:36:35.206
and shiny you have to it kind of you put it's a like

00:36:35.206 --> 00:36:38.626
it's like a life jacket you just have to learn how to swim yeah

00:36:38.626 --> 00:36:41.626
exactly yeah yeah and it's another tool

00:36:41.626 --> 00:36:44.806
i always say like if we're fixing a you know

00:36:44.806 --> 00:36:48.506
an engine on a car we're not only going to use a hammer

00:36:48.506 --> 00:36:51.386
because that would make no sense so it's

00:36:51.386 --> 00:36:54.926
another tool that you have that's accessible

00:36:54.926 --> 00:36:57.766
to use to work on whatever it is

00:36:57.766 --> 00:37:01.046
that you're working on just like regular therapy just

00:37:01.046 --> 00:37:05.046
like hypnosis just like mindfulness meditation like

00:37:05.046 --> 00:37:08.026
all those kinds of things are all tools

00:37:08.026 --> 00:37:11.206
and you have to be like diversified in

00:37:11.206 --> 00:37:14.666
what you're doing it's a holistic approach to

00:37:14.666 --> 00:37:19.706
your healing not just there isn't one thing otherwise everybody would do it

00:37:19.706 --> 00:37:23.566
and there would be no more issues was right so I was like it doesn't work that

00:37:23.566 --> 00:37:29.306
way you didn't just get here overnight and it's there isn't that big magic wand

00:37:29.306 --> 00:37:31.406
that just fixes everything overnight,

00:37:32.415 --> 00:37:38.615
No, and I imagine from the profession that you came from, you don't stop healing

00:37:38.615 --> 00:37:40.615
from it. Is that a correct?

00:37:41.715 --> 00:37:47.215
I would say like you're even from life in general, despite even what my career was,

00:37:47.515 --> 00:37:52.815
I'd say like you, you have to be okay with your journey being a journey and

00:37:52.815 --> 00:37:59.155
you have to be okay with this healing unfolding over time and be just really

00:37:59.155 --> 00:38:00.795
grateful for that as well,

00:38:00.855 --> 00:38:06.575
too, is because you're unwinding so much stuff and this dismantling,

00:38:06.895 --> 00:38:12.975
I mean, it starts as soon as, even before you're born, you start having beliefs

00:38:12.975 --> 00:38:16.415
and narratives and stories imprinted into your system.

00:38:16.715 --> 00:38:21.875
And so it's a small chunk of time, you know, your career, what it is,

00:38:21.955 --> 00:38:27.375
but you're dealing with however many years and before because now you have generational

00:38:27.375 --> 00:38:30.755
issues, generational scars and traumas too.

00:38:30.755 --> 00:38:36.275
So I would say just being okay with it being a journey and not thinking there's

00:38:36.275 --> 00:38:41.855
some finish line that you're getting to, but just know that it's a one step at a time.

00:38:42.375 --> 00:38:46.335
Like, you know, the thousands, you know, journey of a thousand steps starts

00:38:46.335 --> 00:38:55.075
with one step and just being okay with that without this expectation that it has to end somewhere,

00:38:55.255 --> 00:38:59.815
has to get somewhere because I just so far for me, it hasn't.

00:38:59.815 --> 00:39:02.775
So I haven't met anybody that it has.

00:39:02.975 --> 00:39:05.495
So just being okay with that.

00:39:06.335 --> 00:39:10.155
No, and I think sometimes people like get into counseling, like,

00:39:10.255 --> 00:39:13.155
oh, fix this, you know, without realizing that.

00:39:13.475 --> 00:39:18.235
You may fix that issue, but then what's the issue underneath it or what's the root underneath it?

00:39:18.335 --> 00:39:23.255
And then you're like, oh, man, like I am in this for the long haul.

00:39:23.575 --> 00:39:27.415
You know, this is not like a month-long thing. Yes.

00:39:28.409 --> 00:39:33.189
But looking at that as a gift, right, is like you we get to experience this

00:39:33.189 --> 00:39:38.829
like you as the unwinding starts to happen and the healing starts to happen.

00:39:39.129 --> 00:39:44.689
You really start showing up so differently in your life that you're like, OK, like, let's do this.

00:39:44.789 --> 00:39:50.569
Like, what's the next layer of this parfait we're working on is like you kind

00:39:50.569 --> 00:39:55.129
of get that excitement and you're that gratefulness behind it because you're

00:39:55.129 --> 00:39:56.789
not so far in the trenches.

00:39:56.789 --> 00:39:59.829
Or you can kind of see like the

00:39:59.829 --> 00:40:03.009
purpose and everything and the reasoning being

00:40:03.009 --> 00:40:06.909
so much bigger than just us like

00:40:06.909 --> 00:40:12.889
having a more of a global bigger impact on things that it just becomes like

00:40:12.889 --> 00:40:17.949
good it becomes okay like it just becomes a maintenance of you're just going

00:40:17.949 --> 00:40:24.129
to keep growing like you're going to keep on this journey you you also in addition

00:40:24.129 --> 00:40:25.649
to all the work that you do,

00:40:26.269 --> 00:40:32.349
you have a podcast sit around the fire and i love that that that title because

00:40:32.349 --> 00:40:34.509
i think it creates like a a warmth

00:40:34.509 --> 00:40:40.309
just from like hearing it what inspired you to to want to start that.

00:40:42.489 --> 00:40:49.049
The name itself inspired definitely through ram das his sit he has a sit around

00:40:49.049 --> 00:40:55.449
the fire like a kind of a whole I don't know if it's a speech or a story or

00:40:55.449 --> 00:40:56.769
how he kind of tells it but,

00:40:57.928 --> 00:41:02.128
At the end of it, he talks about how, like, all we're going to do is just sit

00:41:02.128 --> 00:41:03.268
around the fire together.

00:41:03.508 --> 00:41:07.128
Like, that's kind of the ending to all the journey and everything.

00:41:08.408 --> 00:41:14.808
And for me, the podcast was, like, a massive put myself out there and growth

00:41:14.808 --> 00:41:16.368
element. And it still is.

00:41:16.448 --> 00:41:21.588
Like, as you know, it's difficult. It's not easy to put yourself out there.

00:41:22.568 --> 00:41:28.568
But I decided, like, I needed to do it. I just had this deep calling in my heart to do this.

00:41:29.008 --> 00:41:35.708
It is also hard one-to-one. You only have so much time available with people.

00:41:35.928 --> 00:41:39.848
And so we'd find like we're talking about things and they want to learn more

00:41:39.848 --> 00:41:44.208
about it or they want their partner to hear something about it.

00:41:44.288 --> 00:41:49.288
And so I was like, okay, I need to just do a podcast to where I can talk about

00:41:49.288 --> 00:41:51.148
things and share things,

00:41:51.288 --> 00:41:55.188
but then also giving a space for other people to share their stories Because

00:41:55.188 --> 00:42:01.228
I think there's so much power in the story and power in the experience of you

00:42:01.228 --> 00:42:05.268
can't not hear somebody's story and relate to some aspect of it.

00:42:05.468 --> 00:42:09.848
And it's that whole vision of sitting around a campfire and what do people do?

00:42:09.968 --> 00:42:14.768
They share stories and you learn from that and you grow from that,

00:42:14.868 --> 00:42:17.288
even though it's not your specific experience.

00:42:17.288 --> 00:42:20.588
So that's what the podcast has really been

00:42:20.588 --> 00:42:24.268
driven towards and just a big push in

00:42:24.268 --> 00:42:27.108
education a big push around like the

00:42:27.108 --> 00:42:30.508
nervous system work we've been talking about and hypnosis and

00:42:30.508 --> 00:42:34.468
you know like even the limiting beliefs

00:42:34.468 --> 00:42:38.708
or core beliefs that we hold the subconscious mind running your life like all

00:42:38.708 --> 00:42:43.728
these things that I never was talked to about you know and so I'm like if I

00:42:43.728 --> 00:42:49.368
can put it out there to just help people understand or to get a different view

00:42:49.368 --> 00:42:53.648
on things then yeah that's a it's an honor to be able to do that.

00:42:54.696 --> 00:43:00.836
I think storytelling has become such a vital process to a lot of people's healing and connection.

00:43:01.456 --> 00:43:08.476
What do you think it is about storytelling that provides that safety where people

00:43:08.476 --> 00:43:09.876
can share just unfiltered?

00:43:11.036 --> 00:43:14.696
Or even when you get on the air and you can share what you're talking about,

00:43:14.756 --> 00:43:17.916
what do you think about storytelling?

00:43:18.516 --> 00:43:20.216
What do you think that brings out in us?

00:43:21.416 --> 00:43:25.316
I think it brings out our a

00:43:25.316 --> 00:43:28.856
bit of our vulnerability a bit of our rawness and

00:43:28.856 --> 00:43:31.936
our truth and it's also bringing out like

00:43:31.936 --> 00:43:34.816
the healing aspect because i think

00:43:34.816 --> 00:43:39.076
we heal together and so that healing

00:43:39.076 --> 00:43:42.336
and community through the storytelling process of

00:43:42.336 --> 00:43:45.276
me sharing elements of my story

00:43:45.276 --> 00:43:48.636
or talking about it for me is another aspect

00:43:48.636 --> 00:43:51.536
of healing like it's another aspect of being

00:43:51.536 --> 00:43:54.716
able to talk about things or share

00:43:54.716 --> 00:43:58.016
through my experience and be open and

00:43:58.016 --> 00:44:04.036
be real in a world that I think we're just craving that realness and that authenticity

00:44:04.036 --> 00:44:10.156
anyways is that's where the story comes in is you hear someone else talk about

00:44:10.156 --> 00:44:14.996
it and you can say again like oh wow like I've been there before.

00:44:14.996 --> 00:44:20.216
I've experienced that or maybe I felt it in a different way,

00:44:20.336 --> 00:44:22.156
but I can still resonate with it.

00:44:22.296 --> 00:44:27.096
And that's where the healing and community happens is because you're healing

00:44:27.096 --> 00:44:29.296
along with me healing together.

00:44:29.736 --> 00:44:36.336
And that's that real connection and that real genuine authenticity back and forth.

00:44:37.421 --> 00:44:44.641
What has this journey meant to you to now be in this very unique position of

00:44:44.641 --> 00:44:51.061
having lived as a first responder and a firefighter and to now helping first

00:44:51.061 --> 00:44:52.961
responders and military in their family?

00:44:53.041 --> 00:45:00.581
What does that feel like for you when you see someone who came into you very

00:45:00.581 --> 00:45:07.101
burdened, full depression or fear, and you see them come out on the other side?

00:45:07.101 --> 00:45:10.841
What is that like for you it feels like

00:45:10.841 --> 00:45:13.661
a gift honestly like it's hard

00:45:13.661 --> 00:45:16.661
to even put words to it to try to find like

00:45:16.661 --> 00:45:20.721
what the actual feeling is I've lost

00:45:20.721 --> 00:45:24.461
a lot of people and friends to suicide

00:45:24.461 --> 00:45:27.621
and that's been a big draw of my

00:45:27.621 --> 00:45:30.941
work as well too is to end the mission

00:45:30.941 --> 00:45:35.001
or to end the suffering in silence essentially and when

00:45:35.001 --> 00:45:38.781
I work with someone and I see somebody even

00:45:38.781 --> 00:45:41.741
through their journey like little steps at a time making

00:45:41.741 --> 00:45:44.761
that progression of doing things differently

00:45:44.761 --> 00:45:47.781
or seeing themselves differently or remembering the truth

00:45:47.781 --> 00:45:50.581
of who they are it's just like how does this

00:45:50.581 --> 00:45:53.741
even I can't even call it work like honestly

00:45:53.741 --> 00:45:56.621
it's just hard to even see it that way it's

00:45:56.621 --> 00:45:59.901
just such a gift and it's such

00:45:59.901 --> 00:46:05.801
a blessing to be able to do it and I know that it has a trickle effect like

00:46:05.801 --> 00:46:10.521
I'll work with people whatever number of people it is in the rest of my lifetime

00:46:10.521 --> 00:46:16.701
but then those people go out and they impact other people and then those people impact other people.

00:46:17.688 --> 00:46:21.788
So I know that the mission and the purpose is much bigger than just me,

00:46:22.028 --> 00:46:27.368
but it's like, man, it's almost a breath of fresh air when somebody comes around

00:46:27.368 --> 00:46:32.648
the other side and is just, you know, even not arrived, again,

00:46:32.728 --> 00:46:35.328
by any form or fashion to a finish line.

00:46:35.328 --> 00:46:38.288
But they can just breathe a

00:46:38.288 --> 00:46:41.688
little bit easier or they can show up

00:46:41.688 --> 00:46:44.688
a little bit differently in life or

00:46:44.688 --> 00:46:48.088
let go of a lot of these things that have been literally

00:46:48.088 --> 00:46:51.588
like killing them in some form or fashion it's just

00:46:51.588 --> 00:46:55.968
like how can you even call it work because I don't know how it's just it's just

00:46:55.968 --> 00:47:01.488
such a cool I call it like my dharma my mission is my purpose like and I know

00:47:01.488 --> 00:47:08.568
when I'm doing it it's just like there's no doubt no question anything it just all comes together,

00:47:09.208 --> 00:47:14.708
that must be really beautiful for you when you see someone like on their first

00:47:14.708 --> 00:47:20.168
session versus like their their 20th or their 30th session to see even the small

00:47:20.168 --> 00:47:22.808
incremental changes that maybe they can't even see.

00:47:24.322 --> 00:47:28.842
I often don't even recognize people sometimes or I have to remind them.

00:47:28.982 --> 00:47:31.562
I'm like, can you hear what you're saying right now? Or

00:47:31.562 --> 00:47:34.662
like what you did is like sometimes people so

00:47:34.662 --> 00:47:40.922
drastically change that there's no way they would have like the same person

00:47:40.922 --> 00:47:45.362
that I started with would not have been this person sitting in front of me telling

00:47:45.362 --> 00:47:50.622
me these things that they're doing now or how they're showing up for themselves

00:47:50.622 --> 00:47:52.582
or they're handling this situation.

00:47:52.582 --> 00:47:56.202
Is like wow can you it's fascinating to see

00:47:56.202 --> 00:47:58.942
in such a testament to how like if

00:47:58.942 --> 00:48:02.422
you all you need is the willingness to change and

00:48:02.422 --> 00:48:05.502
that's it like that's all you need and it's just

00:48:05.502 --> 00:48:11.162
cool to watch like the miracle happen I think sometimes the hardest part is

00:48:11.162 --> 00:48:15.862
just you know showing up to that first session you know and just sitting there

00:48:15.862 --> 00:48:20.302
awkward like you know when do you know like Because I think we're all used to

00:48:20.302 --> 00:48:23.302
like those big intake forms, those big questionnaires.

00:48:23.622 --> 00:48:28.362
Yeah. You know, and sometimes those are just not accessible to some people if

00:48:28.362 --> 00:48:30.462
you're just not in that mind.

00:48:30.942 --> 00:48:33.782
It can be such a deterrent to people.

00:48:34.829 --> 00:48:43.669
What would you say to someone who is struggling right now, kind of in silence,

00:48:43.909 --> 00:48:47.029
and is hesitant to seek help in any way?

00:48:48.089 --> 00:48:54.389
So the person who's struggling, I would say, for one, is you're not alone in your struggles.

00:48:54.749 --> 00:49:01.009
We have all gone through struggles, and we still all have struggles we're going through.

00:49:01.009 --> 00:49:04.369
And so to not feel isolated or

00:49:04.369 --> 00:49:07.709
not to not feel alone is a huge thing

00:49:07.709 --> 00:49:10.409
in your struggling because that's one of

00:49:10.409 --> 00:49:13.789
the biggest things I think suffering in silence causes that

00:49:13.789 --> 00:49:20.369
withdrawal that isolation that I must be the only one feeling this way or no

00:49:20.369 --> 00:49:25.349
one's going to understand how I'm feeling is there are people out there who

00:49:25.349 --> 00:49:32.409
can understand or can give you the space to help you understand it all on a bigger level.

00:49:32.749 --> 00:49:39.549
So if you're struggling to reach out, I would say just start with the exploration phase.

00:49:39.789 --> 00:49:45.289
Like look at people's websites, look at their social medias if they have them,

00:49:45.409 --> 00:49:49.829
is get to know who that person is too before you even call.

00:49:50.049 --> 00:49:52.909
And a lot of practitioners do, you know.

00:49:53.329 --> 00:49:56.149
Complimentary consultations and you can call

00:49:56.149 --> 00:49:59.489
and just have a phone call to see how it

00:49:59.489 --> 00:50:02.669
feels to just be even on the phone with somebody

00:50:02.669 --> 00:50:06.609
and then just continue to try

00:50:06.609 --> 00:50:11.849
like if that person isn't all right fit that's totally okay but there are more

00:50:11.849 --> 00:50:17.989
people out there but you just have to value yourself enough to say this is this

00:50:17.989 --> 00:50:22.169
is a big enough deal this is a big enough commitment to me that I'm gonna do

00:50:22.169 --> 00:50:26.489
whatever I have to do and sometimes you have to you know.

00:50:27.222 --> 00:50:32.562
Try a couple different things before you find what really fits you or a practitioner

00:50:32.562 --> 00:50:34.522
that really fits you as well.

00:50:34.702 --> 00:50:40.582
It doesn't have to be just this version of therapy.

00:50:40.822 --> 00:50:43.942
But time is of the essence. If you're struggling in silence,

00:50:43.942 --> 00:50:48.622
I promise you the silence gets very, very loud in its own way.

00:50:48.622 --> 00:50:57.142
And that you can do this and you can move through the silence and through be

00:50:57.142 --> 00:51:03.002
sick enough of your suffering to want something different and absolutely possible.

00:51:04.162 --> 00:51:07.702
I love that move through the silence. I think that's it.

00:51:07.802 --> 00:51:11.462
I like what you said about doing some research on individuals that you might

00:51:11.462 --> 00:51:14.922
be curious into speaking with.

00:51:15.582 --> 00:51:22.342
What is next for you? you you've accomplished so much I mean all the modalities

00:51:22.342 --> 00:51:30.522
you've learned in your career path and your podcast what it what is next for you good question I.

00:51:31.882 --> 00:51:36.302
I promised my husband that I wouldn't do any more official schooling,

00:51:37.562 --> 00:51:40.502
so as much as sometimes I'm like oh that

00:51:40.502 --> 00:51:44.582
would be fun to do that like a formal big schooling I'm sure there's little

00:51:44.582 --> 00:51:51.062
trainings I'll continue to do to refine and to get more into I really love like

00:51:51.062 --> 00:51:55.722
neuro linguistic programming which is part of what we use with hypnosis that's

00:51:55.722 --> 00:51:59.922
been something that I've really enjoyed so I'm sure I'll do some more work with that but,

00:52:00.693 --> 00:52:03.473
Honestly, it's like in this season for me, it's just

00:52:03.473 --> 00:52:09.053
stepping back a bit and just like being in what I have now and just allowing

00:52:09.053 --> 00:52:15.133
everything to kind of synthesize and settle and just kind of enjoy the work

00:52:15.133 --> 00:52:20.793
that I'm doing because it's been a busy few years getting everything to where it is now.

00:52:20.973 --> 00:52:25.493
So it's just kind of enjoying this season now, working with people and continuing

00:52:25.493 --> 00:52:33.573
to grow the podcast and things like that. But yeah, nothing formal education-wise coming up next.

00:52:33.773 --> 00:52:36.413
I'm just enjoying this season where I'm at now.

00:52:37.033 --> 00:52:40.693
What do you like to do for fun? Like, how do you kind of take care of you?

00:52:42.533 --> 00:52:47.333
Walking is a huge thing for me. I love walks. Like, I love walking the dog,

00:52:47.573 --> 00:52:50.513
being outside. I really enjoy cooking.

00:52:51.093 --> 00:52:57.193
There's something very, like, meditation-like with cooking for me that I really, really like.

00:52:57.753 --> 00:53:01.413
And yeah, I enjoy traveling quite a bit as well, too.

00:53:02.133 --> 00:53:05.533
And just kind of, yeah, being outside.

00:53:06.173 --> 00:53:14.433
Those kind of things are how I mostly recharge or do what I need to do for myself. Yeah.

00:53:15.253 --> 00:53:17.713
Any last words that you'd like to leave us with?

00:53:18.715 --> 00:53:24.095
I think just like kind of the last topic we talked about is just if you're struggling,

00:53:24.095 --> 00:53:26.595
please know that there are people

00:53:26.595 --> 00:53:30.855
here for you and people who can get you connected with other people too.

00:53:31.095 --> 00:53:39.415
But again, my mission is to help end the suffering and just know that like you are incredibly loved,

00:53:39.575 --> 00:53:43.555
you're incredibly valued, and you're incredibly accepted no

00:53:43.555 --> 00:53:46.675
matter what you believe about yourself right now

00:53:46.675 --> 00:53:49.535
is just remember the truth about who you are

00:53:49.535 --> 00:53:55.455
I think that's a beautiful a beautiful statement and I want to thank you for

00:53:55.455 --> 00:54:01.035
for taking the time to meet with me today and all your powerful insights you're

00:54:01.035 --> 00:54:06.775
a very genuine human being and you do a lot of beautiful work from the one I can see.

00:54:07.958 --> 00:54:12.918
And your work is a testament to integrating the mind and the body for deep healing.

00:54:13.858 --> 00:54:16.678
You're not just giving a pill to somebody and saying, go home.

00:54:17.198 --> 00:54:22.658
You're really trying to facilitate deep healing and help people live a better,

00:54:22.818 --> 00:54:26.518
more full life, not just in fight or flight mode.

00:54:27.398 --> 00:54:32.278
And I love what you said about how it creates a ripple effect each person that you help.

00:54:32.738 --> 00:54:35.738
And I think that's a powerful vision if we can wrap our mind how

00:54:35.738 --> 00:54:38.758
one person can affect 10 people and 20 people

00:54:38.758 --> 00:54:41.878
and 30 people and so on and so forth so thank

00:54:41.878 --> 00:54:45.658
you for the work that you have done that you continue to do and

00:54:45.658 --> 00:54:48.858
I hope you get plenty of time to travel and cook and

00:54:48.858 --> 00:54:51.678
walk and really enjoy the world

00:54:51.678 --> 00:54:54.818
around you and to learn more about Ashley

00:54:54.818 --> 00:54:57.758
or to schedule with her please check out

00:54:57.758 --> 00:55:01.818
her show the sit around the fire podcast visit sit

00:55:01.818 --> 00:55:04.558
around the fire.org and visit her.

00:55:04.558 --> 00:55:08.618
Professional website ashleydiller.com all

00:55:08.618 --> 00:55:11.358
links will be in the show notes and as

00:55:11.358 --> 00:55:14.078
always you can find me and the call her

00:55:14.078 --> 00:55:17.658
cat podcast on all major platforms the easiest

00:55:17.658 --> 00:55:20.878
way to connect with me is through our link tree which has

00:55:20.878 --> 00:55:23.678
all our links in one spot don't forget to

00:55:23.678 --> 00:55:29.898
follow us on social media for clip snippets and show updates until we meet again

00:55:29.898 --> 00:55:34.998
please remember you don't have to carry what you came from and keep telling

00:55:34.998 --> 00:55:41.278
your story you never know who you will help ashley is proof of that and thank

00:55:41.278 --> 00:55:43.538
you everybody and we will see you next time.