Becoming a Voice: Advocacy, Mindfulness and Storytelling with Yuval David

Welcome back to Just Breathe. I am so happy you are here. I am really, really excited to bring you today's interview I, you know how you have those conversations, or you know that you're going to have a conversation with someone and you just have no idea how it's going to turn out. And when you have it, whether it's a meeting or an interview, or whatever it is, but once you have it, you're thinking, oh my goodness, this was extraordinary and absolutely nowhere near what I thought it was going to be. That is today's interview. The conversation that you are about to enjoy is quite possibly one of the most unique interviews I've ever, ever shared with you prepared to be entertained, and even perhaps enlightened. This conversation was truly truly an honor to have. So my guest today is Yuval David, he is a celebrated and Emmy award winning actor, host director and filmmaker who has won over 100 international film festival awards. His creative mantra to entertain uplift and inspire shapes his approach to storytelling with boldness, vulnerability and authenticity and representing characters and narratives. As a filmmaker Yuval directs, writes and produces feature length films and short films, documentaries web series, as well as digital and episodic TV content. His most recent feature length documentary is getting industry and media buzz and is currently in the film festival circuit. It's called wonderfully made LGBTQ plus our religion. And we will be talking about this today. I'm so excited for you to learn more so sit tight. As an actor, Yuval played leading roles in film, television, theatre, Web and Digital Media as well as voiceovers. As a TV host and presenter. Yuval focuses on societal humanitarian food, travel, cultural and entertainment programming. His work is seen on network television, documentary films web series and regularly at live events. He is a news commentator on broadcast news programs, speaking about social and political issues and causes, often speaking about civil rights, social justice and representation and politics, social movements, entertainment, and media. In addition to his work in entertainment and media, you evolve as a passionate advocate and activist. Advocacy for the marginalized and underrepresented is a driving force along with his focus on Jewish LGBTQ humanitarian arts and creative initiatives. So without further ado, I am absolutely thrilled to bring you my conversation with uvala David.

Parenting your LGBTQ Teen, the podcast, transforming the conversation around loving and raising an LGBTQ child. My name is Heather Hester and I am so grateful you are here. I want you to take a deep breath. And know that for the time we are together, you are in the safety of the just breathe nets. Whether today's show is an amazing guest or me sharing stories, resources, strategies or lessons I've learned along our journey. I want you to feel like we're just hanging out at a coffee shop having a cozy chat. Most of all, I want you to remember that wherever you are on this journey right now, in this moment in time, you are not alone.

Welcome back to Just Breathe. I am so happy you all are here today. And I am really really excited about this conversation that you are about to listen in on my guest today is you evolve. And I've just was practicing a little bit it's a beautiful next to

that intro one more time. Yeah, don't be timid with me and my name

people too timid. Okay?

I mean, if you're using this as your intro, just say my name again.

Haha, there you go. There we go, I got it

many goals in life but a new one that just came up right now I didn't know it was a goal of mine until this moment is for people to just when they reference me to do so with confidence and boldness. So yeah, let's let's give you out let's do

let's do that again then because that was not confident or bold it was I am still trying to get the sound right in my

ears remember, ah, you've out or just say my name however you want to say it. It's a name that said by people in different places, and they all have their different accents and dialects. And

well, it is it is a beautiful name. And I think that is something that actually this lends itself to so many different conversations of being worried about saying things wrong, right? I mean, we can take that somewhere else get my absolutely but we can't

be worried about what we about everything that we do. If we do things from from a good place, then go with it and run with it. I mean, even if I pronounce your name hither, and you then correct me or you choose not to because maybe you like that I call you hither. Or <he had t her>. <he had t her>. You know, I've actually that sounds pretty amazing.

That does I might have to change my name now.

ought to her warrior goddess. I think that needs to be your name. He oh my god I see with a sword and like, right. Huge sword like the kind that just nobody gets to use other than

<he had t her>. I like Oh,

I think you we now have your your avatar. can you say <he had to her>?

Oh, goodness. He had to her. Right. I knocked that right out of the park the first time?

I think, yeah. You should go with that. Even when you're I don't know when when you're checking in at a hotel or when a telemarketer calls you and say Oh, I'm sorry. You mispronounce my name. It's here to her. Just having them say it.

But you have so much fun. And they have to say it like that. I think you need to be my branding manager with a bit of a

growl Yatta Yeah. Your turn. Come on, give us

he got to her.

I think right. Read hearing that. He otter I think so. I like all right. Well, yeah.

Now this was an intro. This I mean, this was and now you've all you've all great, yeah, whatever,

it's all good. By the end, I'm going to just be it's going to be 12 different ways that I've said it. And I'm going to finally find a way that I like it. Just out of my

life is an exploration and, and we must continue to explore ourselves and allow other people to explore how they how they see us and define us and receive us and you know, here we go are using our names as a way to, to symbolize that type of exploration. And we talk about the relationships that we have in life so often. And even those change, relationships develop. And we need to let that development happen. Because if something is stagnant, well, it's, it's boring. And life is too short to be boring. And even after life, things continue to change, you know, decay happens, memories change and get passed on from one person to another, or one being to another. And eventually we all turn into sand and eventually trees and the wind and the air and it is what it is. So he ought to her. It's a pleasure to be speaking here with you. As you've you've all lighted to have you here and I am delighted to have to have you here too, to be here with you and to be invited on your show. You know you're doing you're doing something with your life. You're using your life as a form of advocacy. You're sharing your journey, your path and other people's journeys and other people's paths by by being vulnerable to sharing yourself and what you have Your family are and are becoming an are developing. So, yeah, thanks for doing that. I want everybody to do that.

I do too. I mean, that is definitely one of the reasons I do this is to encourage others to, to do the same and to, to embrace all of it, not just the easy and the beautiful, but the messy as well. Yeah, and the messy is sometimes equally as beautiful. So

well, you know, as as a as a storyteller, which, that's really the one, if I need to use one term to define everything that I do. It's probably that I work as, as an actor, as a filmmaker, as a director, as a news commentator, as a television host, but also as an activist, and advocate. And throughout all of it. I think of the story, the journey, the characters, and the narratives that I'm imparting, and the audience who's receiving the information that I'm trying to share, what version of myself am I am I sharing? I am all of me all the time, right? I can't cut any part of myself out when I choose to share a version of myself and I will never let somebody cut part of me out part of me that they might not want, or might not accept. I'm all of me. But how do I? How do I manipulate that message? How do I present what I want to present in a way that I think that they want to or are ready to receive it? Or do I present it in a way that they might not want to receive it, but in a way that I embrace the challenge, embrace the messiness as you just spoke about because it's what is imperfect? That is most compelling? It is what is most messy, that resonates with more people?

That is 100% true. And I think a lot of times that's where the growth happens. I mean, you can see light bulbs starting to go off.

I do you look so much brighter. Later all of a sudden, oh, wait, oh, where are your light bulbs like the really old school flashbulb bulbs. cameras in the I don't know what it was like the night,

whatever those were, like, were they burn out after one time?

But yeah, yeah. No, it's not you you don't burn out after a flash you just brighter.

I do. I, I do.

I mean, look, I, I really appreciate the name, just breathe. Write the name that you're using here. And it's something that I try to do. Especially when I'm feeling taxed and challenged and overwhelmed. Which happens. I mean, lately, it's been happening a lot and I, I embrace it. And I say, Okay, let me just center myself and just, and just breathe. And when I when I try to help, entertain, uplift and inspire other people, which is my one of my mantras, one of my brand statements of how I do everything I do you to entertain, uplift and inspire. If I can entertain uplift and inspire myself, and all who I'm collaborating with and all who I hope to have as my audiences or are the people who receive and absorb whatever it is that I'm doing. I tried to do that. So when I, when I feel challenged in the process of entertain, uplift and inspire.

I just breathe

and take that moment. And right now I hear my microphone and the sounds it's capturing every sound. And on one hand, it's making me extremely self conscious. But on the other hand, it just it is where I am.

I will tell you, it is beautiful. That's what's coming through to me is I'm rather captured in this moment. And it's it's clear there's a there's so much and what you're saying and I'm so appreciative of it.

Good because it's real. The nervousness is is there. This has been a day. It's been a week and a month and however vague that is it's everything you could imagine the highs and the lows of life have been I experienced a, I found out today that a friend of mine passed away. And it was, I found that out between having to be on the news commenting about the sag AFTRA strike, and what's happening in Hollywood right now. And before that I was speaking about the plight of LGBTQ people in non democratic countries. So after talking about LGBTQ people, hearing about my friend, and then having to speak about sag AFTRA, and having a glass of water, and now speaking with you, my head has kind of, I don't know, my head has been spinning, and it's my head isn't spinning. I feel like I need to take more breaths. And it's not about it's not about not having a conversation with you or not, or saying no to something else. It's saying this is the reality. This is the reality of life, when we engage in a lot. And we and when we allow ourselves to be engaged, that's not to say that we shouldn't take a break, that we shouldn't pause. And believe me, I am going to take some breaks and pauses today.

But what we it's reminding people that sometimes life, not sometimes, always, life happens, life always happens. And the more you're connected to the light to life, the more life you're going to feel. The more you you pour yourself into life and allow yourself to be that vulnerable, being who is permeable, but from which your bravery and your courage comes from, the more you're going to feel it, the more you will need to take that break and breathe, the more you will need to be in the moment with complete action and still just grieve. That's something that that I get from that the title of your podcast here. And it's something I remind myself in those challenging moments, whether I choose them, or whether I don't.

Yes, yes. Well, that allows us to keep moving. And it allows, I think, that moment of pause is so valuable. And sometimes can do more for us than eight hours of sleep, or, because eight hours is amazing.

It really is. I mean, don't get me wrong, but sometimes we don't have that available to us. Right? It may not be possible for many reasons. So having, you know, there were a million reasons why I named the podcast, just breathe. But that is certainly one of them. Because it is something that we can do at any time, and it is always available,

it is always ready to just breathe. I developed a habit where

which I try to impart on to other people, because it's really worked for me. When I take those moments, whether you call it the just breathe moment, or taking a beat, or centering yourself, or a term I like from from the film and television world, going back to one, go back to one, go back to your mark, we're starting at the beginning of the scene. So in that moment, in that beat in the moment where you just breathe, and absorb the world around you and the world within you. Choose in that moment, to immediately bless that moment, yourself and the environment and the world around you. Acknowledge that moment and say to yourself, I have no idea what is going to happen next.

I can plan.

I can do the work. I can do the preparation for whatever's going to happen next, but I don't actually know what is going to happen. Because I am living and I'm alive and I'm awake and I'm engaged and don't lose your or don't base your gratitude for this life on how you're feeling in that moment, or how you might look or the successes or the failures of your preparation and your practices, but base your gratitude board the moment merely because you have the moment. And because you are because I am. In Hebrew, there's a word he nanny, which is a biblical Hebrew word. Which those of you who have studied the Bible, you might have first heard that word he nanny when? When Moses walks up to the burning bush and God says, Should I do like the old school? Do it? Yeah, God speaks to Moses from the burning bush, and said, Moses, because for some reason, back then God always had a British accent. Moses, Moses, and Moses was American, in what is it Charlton Heston? Who is yes, that he was American, but God was British. And anyway, but in the, in the Hebrew Bible, Moses responds, he many, which means I am I am. So in that moment, he named me base your gratitude for the life for this moment merely because you have this moment, because you are because I am. And then with that mindfulness and with the direction of, of your spirit, whatever you're feeling, however you look, whatever your preparation and whatever your life was like before this moment, whatever your moments before were, with your mindfulness and direction of your spirit.

To yourself, say I am, I am here I am now

this moment will never come again. This moment will never happen ever again. I will never look exactly like this, I will never feel exactly like this. The people and the world and the environment that I'm looking at and engaging with will never be exactly the same as it is right now. I won't ever see the sun twink the sunlight twinkling on the rippling water in front of me I won't see that leaf blow in the wind the way it does. My jaw might not clench as it does, I might not smell that distant scent of a flower or the lavender in the distance the way I am right now. I might not hear the bird chirping where the truck driving down the road or an ambulance siren in the distance just like that I might not ever see the stars twinkle the same way that they are right now or feel the wetness of the night grass as I look up at the moon the same way as I am right now. I will never have this moment the way I am right now. I will never speak the way I am right now or here the way I am right now. I won't be the way I am right now. I might not ever hear my friend's voice again, as I have right now or as I have in the moment before my mother might not look the same as she did last week or the week before I won't have the same feelings as I have right now or as I felt before because each of those things is unique in the moment and I won't ever experience any of these things ever in the exact same way again and that's the way that is life. Nothing in my life will ever happen just like this ever again. And not but and I keep moving forward. My life is moving forward. My gratitude for this life for this moment is it is because I am here because I am now

because I am and now just breathe.

You've left me a little bit speechless. Which is unusual. Every everybody listening knows that. Thank you. I've never thought about those moments of gratitude like that. Often times you think about I mean, typically up but honestly I am grateful for what I have right. I am grateful for what is I am grateful for what I am manifesting right but not I am grateful

period. The more we, the more we practice gratefulness. And I have no long how I have no clue how long it took me to say what I just said, I lost the sense of time there. That's okay. Those thoughts don't have to take as long as I said them, doesn't have to take five minutes, 10 minutes, one minute, an hour a day. It can be momentary, it can be a split second, the more we practice that the more available it becomes that momentary gratitude, that momentary blessing, self blessing for ourselves and for the world. And universe around us.

That is the lesson. The end, we're done. And

now we go back to one.

Oh, my goodness. Okay. If anybody else cried, it's okay. Because I am crying.

So just hold that. Okay. Tears are good.

Tears are good. Tears are are actually very important. It's cathartic. And there's something in too many societies, for our people, and for our people, I mean, our human people around the world. Were within these societies, they try to say that it's not okay to cry. You know, don't cry,

don't don't cry. It's okay. Don't cry, or be a man who hate that one. Hear that a lot. Or Don't be a pussy. Right? Don't cry. In fact, crying is so healthy, it is so real. And you know what our eyes needed to because it's cleansing. It cleanses our eyes, we tear up when dust blows in our eyes, we tear up when dust blows into our soul. We tear up when something feels dirty or spicy, right? We spicy food I must write for people who who are feeling trapped, or are dealing with anxiety and depression or trying to suppress whatever it is in in their life. Go to your own quiet space. If you can find it, if you have it. And play one of those playlists that you can find on I don't know Spotify on Apple on Amazon music or or wherever you can find music or sing your own song that brings about tears.

The playlist or the song that will make you cry. Let it out. Let yourself feel those tears.

And if you have noticed that you haven't cried for a long time, crease for yourself.

Give yourself that moment of self gratitude to cry. It is balancing and it is cathartic. And it is so important in our lives. I mean how at the moon go out and howl at the moon bave

in water and you know let your soul the sound reach the depths of your gut.

Yeah.

And if you ever hear somebody saying to someone else who don't cry, quickly chime in and say it's okay to cry. I'm I'm here with you. And if you don't want me here with you, I'm over there with you.

Yes, yes. It is such an important release. And it's a really good thing to teach our children.

Absolutely.

And to your point share with share with everyone around us but as a lot. A lot of you listening our parents. It's never too late to shift that messaging.

is crying more vulnerable than laughing.

I believe I think If that is the stigma, what do you think?

Maybe that's too general of a question. I want to say no. But you're right, there's a stigma that's associated with it. It's okay for us to see somebody cry with joy, and cry with, with delight or surprise. And we think that that's wonderful.

But to cry with the remorse,

or loss or sadness or depression isn't, is if we try to mask the fact that the lows are part of life, but they're part of life. They happen and they will happen, and they're going to happen and more of them will happen as long as we live. So as long as we embrace the vulnerability of true self expression, which crying oftentimes is, based on the way we're socialized, we recognize that crying just like all of our vulnerabilities, are a power. Vulnerability is a power. It's a good acknowledging vulnerability as a self power when we feel it. Or when we express it. It's a power sharing it with others, is maybe even more vulnerable. It's even more of a power. But not everybody has to receive our vulnerability.

Not everybody

needs to choose to go on that journey with us. That's their own choice. And we can also choose who we feel safe enough to be vulnerable with, we need to trust somebody to truly and authentically share our vulnerability. I mean, have you ever signed an NDA a nondisclosure agreement?

Yes, yes,

I have so many times, but I can't tell you about it. But if if we really share that vulnerability, with somebody in our truest way, and I'm not just speaking now as, as an actor, and as a director, and as a storyteller, news commentator, when I go on to public platforms and share my vulnerabilities or the vulnerability of the narrative or the story, I'm talking about the more intimate relationships, the more real here and now type of moments. If we're sharing the vulnerability with

someone, then maybe,

maybe that's someone has to be somebody who we have an NDA with the nondisclosure agreement. If you're truly going to share all of yourself, without filters, then share that with somebody who you trust who has that nondisclosure agreement that NDA. But if we share a vulnerability with everybody, even if we don't know them, or trust them, then you know what, it's not a vulnerability. Because vulnerability includes a risk and an uncertainty. And not everybody deserves that disclosure. Not everyone is that safe person, not every situation is that safe space, not everybody is the right person and not every moment is the right moment for you to totally be open as you are. Because we are human beings, we are animals and we do have to be on guard, we do have to be ready it's how we're trained. As much as we try to use the the mantras and the meditations and the dogmatic religions and whatever philosophy books to be bigger and greater than ourselves. The truth is, get deeper and more specific into yourself into how small you are. And then you will know when to be vulnerable and when not. And then your vulnerability when you are so much more special. So much more beautiful and cathartic. Whoa, I didn't expect this kind of conversation in our podcast today.

I didn't do there. I really didn't at all and I'm

I am. I am rather taken by it.

I just said that but I am searching for another

way to describe it is truly unique. I have in my 100 Plus episodes, have not, thank you, I have not had a conversation like this ever. And,

and I have had lovely conversations with the lovely people.

But this is very thought provoking. And even on this point of vulnerability, thinking about the times that how difficult it is for many, to be vulnerable at all.

And that really takes

a lot of inner work a lot of courage, a lot of being connected. But then understanding also how being vulnerable

can help others. Yeah.

Well, you know, you focus a lot on family relationships, right? On parents and, and children and future parents and grandparents and you know, all the relationships, the entire lineage. And I think that's those are the relationships were when they are relationships that are based in love, in just loving your children, loving your parents and your grandparents and your grandchildren. And whatever it is.

Those are the relationships where

the loving relationships where people do allow themselves to experience vulnerability, and ensuring, creating, fighting for those safe spaces to allow those we love to be able to be vulnerable. Yes, and when we can think about that, that those are the NDA people, those are the non disclosure agreement people. And that includes our chosen family. Right, not only the families were born to, but our innermost circle, we must always make sure that we can be vulnerable in that innermost circle. And we must always ensure that those who share that space with us can be vulnerable as well. And it's our duty to them to, to have that safe space where we can laugh, and we can cry, and maybe one second after the other, maybe one moment after the other, or both at the same time. Yeah. And to just breathe together, you know, we have these yoga classes, or the yoga instructor might read from a book and give, you know, her philosophical thoughts of the day. And we think about the breath. And we have the meditation classes and the houses of worship, or even just waking up in the morning, you wake up in the morning and you have that breath, or maybe that breath as you snuggle into bed.

It's that vulnerable moment to allow yourself to relax and to just be those are teaching moments for the rest of the moments throughout our days, especially the moments that challenge us. And if we can prepare and train for the moments that challenge us, because even in the most highly stressful, highly frightening, challenging, intense, angering whatever moments, the most intense moments. That's when we need to have that just breathe moment. Those are the moments where we need to recognize our vulnerability because it's from that vulnerability that we know how to be strong. And we know how to be brave. bravery and courage doesn't come from strength. It comes from weakness. It comes from acknowledging our weaknesses. And then knowing what we need to defend what we need to protect what we need to fight for.

And fight forward. Not fight back for how do we fight forward for it? Yeah, and write it out.

And also, I think knowing that we don't need to know. We can want to

know, absolutely don't need to know. But we can absolutely want to know. Yes. And in contrast, I guess we also have the right to just not I do not have

it don't have the capacity for knowing Oh,

yeah, I can't even I like that expression. I can't even.

I can't even Oh, I use it all the time.

Yeah, I've been using it lately. I can't even.

It really just holds up, like

covers everything, doesn't it? At times when perhaps you can't use other words or phrases you'd like to, it really covers a lot.

My can't even lately has become. I don't have the bandwidth for that. Yeah, that's what I've been saying lately. I can't even I don't have the I choose to not have the bandwidth for this thing right now.

Yes. Yes.

You are protecting?

Yeah, protecting my vulnerabilities protecting my weaknesses in the moment saying, I cannot. I can't even right now. I can't do this for myself to myself right now.

And that's okay. And that is? Okay. It is okay. Because

if you don't take that time for yourself, and you don't take that moment for yourself,

then,

you know, you're gonna burn out any person. But I mean, especially doing all of the work that you do. Yeah.

Look, I mean, everything that I've been saying in this conversation, I also say to myself, and remind me of working with in entertainment, media, and social and political advocacy. Those worlds and industries and communities are challenging, and I pour all of myself into it. Because I also enjoy it. And I delight in it. And I'm passionate about it, and I care with every fiber of my being. Yet, I have seen burnout on the horizon, I've experienced burnout. And I know how much I need to give myself in order to give others it's, it's like when, when on the airplanes, there's the emergency announcement, I'm sure you've heard this referenced before, because a lot of people say what I'm about to say, when the flight attendants do the whole stick of showing you what you know how to put your seatbelt on and all that they say, if the airbags drop, you must first put the airbag or face mask, whatever it's called on yourself, before you put it on your children or your loved ones. Because if we don't take care of ourselves first, we can never take care of anybody else. If you can't love yourself, you can never love anybody else. Yeah, and when we recognize that burnout, that just means we haven't been loving ourselves enough. And I've been experiencing that myself, for myself, the way I treat myself. And it is not a good feeling to have. It is not a good realization to have, but it's an important tab. It's necessary, saying who? Whoa, I need to take two letters, the letter N and the letter o, and put them together and say no. I'm not available for that. No, I don't have the bandwidth for that. No, I can't even

Yes. So that that's something that I

something that's important for people to to recognize and within our LGBTQ i A plus community. And the plus of the community is the most important part of that alphabet soup of the name of our community and our LGBTQIA plus movement, because it's the plus of the ally ship. And the plus means a lot of things. The plus of the LGBTQ i A plus means that we have allies, the people who support us who love us who are connected to us. The Plus also means that we have more letters coming girl we have more letters, we don't know what they are yet and we haven't named them yet or maybe they are named and we're still working on adding them. So it's plus we're going to add, yep. But it's also the plus the ally ship that we can give each other and ourselves. Every single one of us is the plus, whether you are the L, the G, the B, the T, the Q, the I, the a, you know, whatever, or whatever other letters that haven't yet named, every one of us has to be the plus for ourselves, and for each other. It's why I oftentimes say that our LGBTQ ia plus community is more of a movement than a community. Because many of us are not being the plus for each other.

And, yeah, we need to try to be the plus for each other. Actually, don't try. Do it. Just be the plus. Just be the plus. Right? I mean, it's what Yoda said. There is no try. There is only do or do not. Sorry, I'm a giant dork. It is what it is. Like, I can't

that is awesome. Thank you just made my entire day.

I mean, I'm not going to make you cry. I can't do some yoga.

But, I mean, not many people can do that. I just for a moment have to take that and

I'm always geek, it's like it's yeah.

It's, it is a

thing. But there are a few that can pull that off. So bravo.

Well, I mean, throughout my life, I grew up speaking multiple different languages and I specialize in accents and dialects and when I do voiceovers, and as an actor, I'd say probably probably three quarters of the roles I've ever played have been foreigners or or let's just call them non Americans you know, depending on where your audiences so I practice my using my voice of thought, how can I use my voice in a way that will impact somebody or that will convey my character's truth? How can I use my voice in a way that shares my own truth? And I noticed that the more stressed I get the more anxious I get and exhausted I get the more nasal I get. So I tend to get like really here like very much in the Wall Street behind the bridge of my nose. And when I'm most grounded Oh, I love that voice. That's like the that's the me I want to be the WHO Wow, listen to that. depths, depth. Listen to that breath. So yeah, oh gosh, I'm just giving you sit I'm philosophizing nonstop. We were just went from Yoda. My Yoda impersonation to philosophizing about about voices. The point of that was that I like to practice different voices. And when I'm anonymous, like when I'm at the grocery store, or out shopping or speaking to somebody who I think I might never talk to, again, many times I'm not this evolved, like I will say, Oh, this is a perfect opportunity for me to pretend to be somebody totally different. And put on an accent or you know, speak a different language and pretend I don't speak English, or you know, whatever country I'm in whatever the vernacular is there. And it is very fun. Although sometimes it has happened a few times where somebody I know would walk into the situation and look, what are you? Why are you talking with a British accent? Why? Why sang your selfie from London?

Oh, my God,

just to share, and I was talking to her, and she was just like, living for this dialect. And I was saying, like, Oh, darling, it's so great to be here. You know, it's just every everything here at Whole Foods is really wonderful. I love the way it's laid out. It's so easy to shop here. And it's everything is so much cheaper than London. And as I was saying, this was one of my friends. Eva, like, Hey, this is like what's going on? And I was like, oh, no, I'm going to need to speak to my friend. Sounds like hey, with a British London or south.

Yeah,

I was like, What is my next sentence going to be? I was I started sweating and I just kind of told you a little bit quiet like it's like really weird to try to mask that I was speaking British, like London or dialect to this cashier because I didn't want to like demolish her world like I was complimenting her and she was feeling great and she was happy and cuz I noticed that first moment she the cashier there she was, oh, no, she seemed like she was having a rough days. I was like, Yeah. Here's an opportunity for me to say nice things to just create a scenario and make her feel great, you know, in the moment, and then my friend ruined it ruined. So it's just like, I just spoke to her to my friend. I was like, yeah, so I'll catch up with him later. And she looked at me like, What are you? Why are you? She walked away? I called her later. I was like, oh my god, this is what just happened. She's like, You are so stupid. You're such an idiot. Like, I can't believe I was. I can't thank you for not ruining it.

Oh, my gosh, that is awesome. Because what wouldn't chair I mean, a British accent chairs up everyone.

There's something in the British dialects and America like Americans love them. Yes, it's

so very true. It is a weird thing. Just a very weird thing.

Well, I think maybe because we don't hear as many accents.

In the US.

Maybe that's not so true anymore. I was gonna say maybe we don't hear as many accents in the US, as we do. In other parts of the world, other metropolitan areas. I mean, definitely. In Europe, because so much of the world has been Euro focused for a long time, where you get more people mixing and traveling.

Yeah, maybe that's just how it is in any place that doesn't get as many as many people I know, when I travel in, in Central, or in the Midwest, right? Different than, and I'm not in major cities like Chicago, or, or Los Angeles, or, you know, even Miami or DC or New York or San Francisco, but cities that don't have as much traffic. Let's call it that. Yes. That's when there's something a bit more exotic. And people like the accents, I mean, even my name. I was born in the United States, right? But when people meet me in certain parts of the US, like, Oh, you've all what? Where that? Where are you? Where are you from? And I said, Well, I'm from from DC, though. No, no, but where are you from? I'm from DC. Think No, no, but you have an accent. I was I have an accent. I said, If I said my name was Sean, or oh, this is my favorite. In other Alter Ego I have. His name is Sebastian. I just liked that name. If I said my name was Sebastian, like, you were just looking me like, oh, okay, bye. And it's something in our American culture that I don't know if people are struggling with what really is American. That's what the woke movement has been trying to do. And a lot of people criticize it. And now woke mean something totally different than what it originally did. But it's just to to awaken ourselves to the fact that there are multiple narratives out there. of our people of our people hood, even our American people hood.

Yes. To be aware, right?

To be awake. Yep. That's what woke really is about what it means to be awake to what's happening. And yes, what's so bad about that? The contrast is what to be asleep to it to close your eyes to it and not be aware of it. Be aware. It's all it means. Yes, it means somebody else has their story. Somebody else has their life. And if they're kvetching and complaining, and, and an angry or upset or just trying to share with you, and let them share. And if you have that moment, if you have the bandwidth, and just listen. And the response, the woke response is I hear that you're saying these things. I've

I feel these things I've sensed these things from what you've just shared. I appreciate that. You've shared them with me. That's it.

That's it. It's not saying no, you're wrong. You can't be the cue are the black narrative and America is not the main like what you know, like people are arguing about because this is a topic we speak about here in the US quite a bit. Like why do we have Juneteenth that's not the American holiday. And it's like, actually, it is an American holiday, you woke to it be awake to just hear the narrative of other people. So when I, when I speak with conservative people, especially from an advocacy standpoint, even if it's on the news, if I'm on a panel with people who systematically are against just about every part of my identity, I will bring up topics like this saying there's be aware, be awake to it. Just like you want to be respected for your thoughts and your identity, respect them for their thoughts and their identity. And that's it.

Yeah. Yeah.

I mean, I think it boils down to people don't like being uncomfortable. Oh, God, but

those of us who love vulnerability, love that discomfort, because it's his word. Art happens and creativity happens and, and love, love in every meaning. And every way we can share and express love comes from vulnerability,

that does connection, understanding, actually seeing people. Yeah, it comes from being uncomfortable. Mm hmm. Just embrace it, embrace it, embrace that.

And then discover if you want to be uncomfortable, you know, maybe you don't want it. And that's fine. So you embraced it. You acknowledge that. And you can change your place, you can change your direction, you can change your location, you can change the way you lean into it. So I'm an avid skier like skiing is my favorite sport. It's a milestone of every year. It's one of my favorite getaways to just place my mind somewhere else to go to high elevation to 14,000 feet elevation, and to have my helmet and my ski gear and to be challenged. And I lean into the challenge. In skiing, the skiing one on one lessons are the same lessons that are applied to two skiers who are doing the double black diamonds and doing the challenging mogul runs or skiing through and around the trees. You need to lean into it. Skiing is a forward moving sport, you need to bend your knees, you bend a little bit at the hip, you bend the every joint and you lean forward, you lean into the challenge, you lean downhill. Most people when they're going down a very sheer steep slope. They're leaning back like oh my god, this is scary. I'm going to lean away from it. That's the exact opposite of what you need to do. When you need to brace the slope and what you're doing, you lean into it, you lean into that discomfort. And then the more that you push your your shins into the front of the boot, the less discomfort you feel. If you don't press your shins into the front, you're going to feel a lot of discomfort. So when you feel those moments of discomfort, maybe just lean into it a little bit more and you won't be uncomfortable anymore.

Like that.

That is an excellent analogy. As a fellow skier, I understand that now, if there are those out there who don't ski, I highly recommend it at a new ski. I the last place I didn't see at all this past year. I was very, very sad. I know. But I skied Jackson Hole last year, which was oh my god, I love Jackson. Like, that was my I had wanted to go there for like 20 years. So it's been my dream. And we took our two younger kids, and my youngest is like, just super athletic. And he was so excited to skate with me. And, and go and he's like, I think I might be faster than you and I was like, Well, you know, you you are, you know, almost 15 now and muscley and all the things. I'm a little bit older than that. So yeah, but I can still take you so that might be the one place that I can. But I mean I would never say that I'm like oh my gosh, yes. I don't know if that's my favorite place ever. I think I've had other places that I like more but that was definitely a

it was a dream and I was so

delighted just to be there

I skied Jackson Hole this last winter. Did you? Oh yeah. skied Deer Valley Park City. Aspen, Beaver Creek, Jackson Hole. What else am I missing? I feel like I'm skipping one of the places I skied this past winter. But yeah, it's we have some, some beautiful places. I don't ski East Coast very much anymore. I've been spoiled by powder and skiing and tons of snow and powdery conditions.

There's nothing like it. There's nothing like it. I learned to ski in East Coast Midwest. So you know, I learned how to ski on ice and hard, you know, part of actually makes you

a better skier. I think I just learned to ski in the East as well.

Yeah, so we are Rockstar skiers, because of because of that, because skiing and powder is like,

so easy. It's so much easier. Just so great. When I'm forced to know, when I choose to ski with skiers who are not at or near the level that I'm at, and they're skiing in powder, and they're nervous about it, and they're trying to avoid the powder. I keep saying no, no, you have to find the pow. You got to get into the powder. It's the best. But it's scary. I don't know what's there. And I like exactly like leaning into it. And skiing becomes so much easier. When you see into the powder.

If you happen to fall, it's no big deal.

My screensaver, let's say is

that, so this past winter, I hiked. I hiked up to 14,000 feet elevation and skied down. This was in Aspen. And that was one of my favorite ski days of my entire life. Just Oh, I bet. Oh, it was such a good workout hiking up the mountain. And I had to stop a few times and just catch my breath and take photos of the beautiful environment around me. And it was breathtaking and challenging. And I made it to the very top and I felt so successful. I felt so like I achieved something great. And I was ready to ski down. And I was chatting with this woman who was up there and I'm like, oh my god, this is amazing. workout like, Oh, God, I wish I could do this every day. And she's like I do. I said what she's like, Yeah, I do this every day. And I said, that was a really hard workout. I was like I now understand because even with all her ski gear, I could tell that she was probably like shredded. She was probably only muscles. Oh my god. She said not only that, I do it twice a day. I'm like you do this twice a day, tap it. And she said it was a mental health thing for her. She was a way to alleviate stress. And she just fell in love with it. And she's in the best shape of her life. And I for like three or four days afterwards. I continued to lose weight. Or to lose fat. I should say that way. This was a really good workout. Yeah, and shredded. And I did it once. Like this wonder woman who I

Oh, I love that.

She wasn't panting she wasn't like she wasn't stroke. I was panting struggling and I thought I'm in pretty good shape. But yeah, Wonder Woman at the top of the mountain. Oh my god Good for her. Right. I haven't been skiing down like I I felt like I earned it. I think yeah, just ride a chairlift and go the easy way up. I earned the powder on the way down. And then I was done. Then I was and that's a day.

I'll try ski right. Oh, yeah, Friskies. Always good. Always good. Yes.

Oh, my goodness. That is so funny. I remember as a little kid, we've the place that we used to go and I was wondering do you need see the opry scam? Like what is that my parents were like, Oh, don't worry about it. And then I became old enough to understand and I was like, Well, this is magic. is pretty great. It's it's it's a good thing after Adamski.

It sure is.

Oh, my goodness. Okay. So I just looked at our time and I've taken a lot of your day. And I really, really want to talk about your movie.

Oh my god, please do. So.

I am so intrigued. I am. So first of all, it is called wonderfully made. And I want to know everything about it, I want to know how you came up with this concept.

And I read

somewhere and everything that I was reading that this is the first and it's a series, it's going to you're planning a series,

I would love to turn this into a series, a lot of the a lot of that rides on the success of, of this film, to be an independent filmmaker requires blood, sweat, and tears. And I do mean all of that. I cannot imagine it's not a it's not an easy, simple task, and creating wonderfully made. LGBTQ plus are, is the secondary title really allowed me to experience all of that blood, sweat and tears. And I'm very proud of it wonderfully made LGBTQ plus Ar is started as an art project. Because I noticed that there was a lacuna, a gap of place where LGBTQ people of faith were struggling to be seen. And it actually started with, with my husband with my partner, he is Catholic, and he was trying to find Catholic iconography. That would, would speak to him that would represent him as a gay Catholic man, it was looking online, and it was trying to find imagery that would speak to him and that, you know, piece of art that would encapsulate everything that he wanted and needed to see for whatever spiritual journey and spiritual moment that he was on. And he couldn't find it. And I said, Well, hey, you married, a creative you married. And artists, you know, my art is, is within film, television and theater. But I can do this, let's, let's do this. Because you're not the only one throughout my advocacy, especially the LGBTQ advocacy, I encounter so many people who also are religious, or have challenges and aspirations within the intersectionality of their LGBTQ and religious identities. So let's create something for you and for anybody who like you, is searching for something. And that's how this project began as a photo art project, producing and creating this this photo art, representing Jesus as a member or ally of the LGBTQ community, represented by almost a dozen different LGBTQ plus people. What does a Jewish guy have to do creating this, some people have asked things like, well, I, I am connected to my faith and my faith traditions. I've have a degree in art history. I've studied this stuff. And I'm engaged in LGBTQ advocacy. And I encounter people who, who are seeking something, and I'm married to somebody who is seeking that something. And that's how this project began and turned into a documentary, which explores the creation of this art, and interviewing leading, leading Catholics who deal with the specific intersectionality of LGBTQ and Catholic identity. So if this film is successful, whatever that means, then I'll be able to hopefully turn it into a series exploring all different faith traditions, and continually exploring this and creating art for people of these different religions and faith traditions to find that they can also be LGBTQ at the same time, but also representing what it means to be LGBTQ within a religion for those who are not LGBTQ so they can see that we exist, that we exist within every community because the LGBTQ community is the most diverse community in the world because we're part of every other community in the world. So wonderfully made, actually does tackle a lot of these these issues in a creative way. And I would love for all of your listeners to to go to the website wonderfully made film.com And you can also find the movie and the art on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook at wonderfully made or wonderfully made movie, you'll be able to find it. And, you know, it's it's a it's a form of art for social change. It's a grassroots independent reduction that requires audiences to share the message to reach the people who need to reach who need to be reached. Because a fact is, when we look at what's happening on a socio political level, to and with the LGBTQ community and movement, we recognize that the vast majority of anti LGBTQ laws, legislations, rules and beliefs are on the basis of religion. So let's go to the root cause of where those thoughts and issues are coming from, and explore it, and then create the change within the religion. So people acknowledge that LGBTQ people are there. Now, this isn't only a message to the religious people who are anti LGBTQ. It's also a message to people who are religious and might not be aware of LGBTQ people or might not care, and it shows them why they should care. But it's also a message to LGBTQ people, that they can be of faith, that they can have an intersectional identity, the mere fact that I'm LGBTQ doesn't mean that I'm no longer everything else. And it also doesn't mean that my LGBTQ identity must be the most important part of my identity. It could be, it doesn't have to be same thing with having a religious identity, or a cultural or an ethnic identity, you know, that we all have intersectional identities, that that it's about the communities that we're part of where they intersect within that Venn diagram. And, and that's what this film really tries to do with a specific focus on LGBTQ Catholics.

Wow. Yeah, wow. It's

I mean, it is it is a lot. But I love that you've done this, because this is something that is very, very needed. And it is a topic that can be very triggering, it can be very painful, it can be something that, you know, has perhaps been either sidelined or left behind. Because of all the things right. So I appreciate I'm looking forward to, to actually seeing it myself, I just received it from your, your PR person a little bit earlier today. So I have not had a chance to take a look. But it will also be linked in the show notes. And I'll have a link to everything. So it'll be very easy for everyone listening to be able to click through to all these different pieces that you just mentioned.

Wonderful. Yeah, I mean, it's it's really being an independent filmmaker is, is hard. And it requires collaboration with audiences, as well. It's how we get the message out because we don't have the power and the financial backing of major studios to fund the marketing and the PR, which marketing costs. Most people don't recognize when they talk about oh, how much does it cost to make a movie? They don't recognize that the vast majority of the budget goes towards marketing and PR. The most people think about oh, production, that's the sexiest part. That's the most exciting part. What happens when the cameras are on? That is the smallest part of the production? Wow, most of of the production time. Right? Is in editing is in what's called post production, the editing, the sound mixing the color correction is all of the stuff like what do we do with all the content that we have? But then once the film is finished, the vast majority of the work and the budget depending on how much money you have goes into Okay, what do we do now? How do we get this out there because the sky's the limit when it comes to marketing, advertising and PR costs?

Oh, so there's also a donate button on the website. wonderfully made film.com Which if this does speak to you, then please join us in the in the movement and join our community to to help spread the message of this film and to prove to people within the industry that there is an audience for this. It's a tricky topic for people religion. Some people focus on traditions and keeping things traditionally as they are and very much protecting it. Other people don't want to deal with it at all because they've been affected negatively by it or or they're not part of it anymore, or whatever it is. But we cannot practice erasure of erasing the people who are still part of it, the people who are still experiencing it. And those are important audiences as well. That's something that the entertainment industry needs to learn and needs to acknowledge that it's not all about putting things in its own specific little bubbles, like, Oh, this is, this is a an LGBTQ film. So we're only going to put it for the LGBTQ, you know, playlists, or whatever it is on Netflix, or Amazon or Hulu or, you know, whatever. And this is a religious film. And we're gonna put it here for only the religious community. And here's the you can't separate everything we need to be able to, to reach the communities. And it's rare for us to see a film that is both an LGBTQ film and a religious film together in one. And I think that many people in the film industry are confused by that, like, Well, how do you have both? I mean, it's either LGBTQ, or it's religious and like, Nope, it's, it's, it's both. Who's the audience? Is it LGBTQ people? Or is it religious people? Like? Yes. And yes, yes. Both? You are a trailblazer. Am I

all right, yes, thanks. So a trailblazer,

Trailblazer. That's the word that just came to mind. I don't know if any, anything else that has been done like this. And I, those reactions are both understandable. And, you know, obviously, for good reason. And this has the potential to shift that. And that's the power of

the power of art. You know, people, when they view the art that we created, or view the film, just like art does for all different types of art does. It's meant to provoke thoughts and emotions, and make people change. Art isn't only there to make us feel comfortable. It's also there to make us let's go back to that word vulnerable. It's there to to disturb and disrupt. In addition to making us feel comfortable and feeling seen and feeling represented and recognized, it's, it can do all of those things. So that's what I really aimed to do with this project. Now, it just takes audiences to watch it, see it, you it and share it

and share it. Yes. Okay. Well,

this is we have our, our homework, don't we? We do.

I like it. I like it.

This has been the most unexpected, and most wonderful. And

may I just feel like my cup is full. I feel like my soul is been just, I don't know, rejuvenated. So this conversation, thank you. And I know that you've had just a tough, a tough day, and many tough days and lots going on. And so I am

very grateful that you've been here, and I've shared so much of your soul, with me and with my audience.

Thanks are to you. I thank you for your time. Thank you for bringing me on to your show and sharing me with your audiences and all of my Uber philosophizing.