July 28, 2022

I Absolutely Can

I Absolutely Can

Doubt is something we are all very familiar with but what if you could free yourself from expectations and have the confidence to realize your dreams. In this episode we discuss this powerful emotion and how you can step out of fear and into “Yes, I absolutely can!”

About the Host:

Jani Roberts is the Owner of Alignment Essentials, a health and wellness company spanning the fitness, self-improvement, and mindfulness spaces. She is the creator of the Warrior® Workout, Moving Meditations™, Inspirational Conversations™ and all of the Alignment Essentials programming content. In addition, Jani is an International best-selling author of the book, Navigating the Clickety-Clack, How to Live a Peace-Filled Life in a Seemingly Toxic World.

Jani has over 40 years of experience in the health and wellness field. She owned and operated a large gym franchise in Florida, as well as a boutique studio for several years where she specialized in health and wellness related services, products, preventative health education, personal training, small group fitness classes, private nutrition and health coaching.

She has literally trained hundreds of thousands of instructors around the world, and she was the featured choreographer and performer on numerous training DVDs. She has presented for dozens of large Health and Wellness brands such Nike, and Adidas. She holds several certifications through ACE, AFAA and NASM.

Jani travels extensively as a speaker and presenter sharing her Alignment Essentials wellness tools and helping people find more joy in their lives and is currently training at the Shamanic Institute of Healing. 

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Transcript
Jani Roberts:

What? Life isn't supposed to suck? Get out of here. Life is supposed to be good for me? I don't think so. Truth? Did you know that you have the power to create your own reality? True? Did you know that you can live the life that you've always desired? Holy? That's right. And that's why we're here. Are you ready? Unless you're on Joy overload, you've come to the right place. It's time to get out of your own way and start creating more of what you want, and less of what you don't end up with the excuses. I'm your host Jani Roberts. Let's do this.

Jani Roberts:

Welcome back, everybody. I got one thing. I got one thing to talk about today. I need your help. Listen to this. Maybe I'm psycho. Maybe, maybe I'm a little out of touch. Maybe I'm delusional. Or a shotglass. Away from insane. Maybe I'm foolish. Maybe I'm disconnected from all reality. But that's fine with me. Because I'm happy here. It's my life. It's my voice. It's my mind. I can do what I want. All I want. I don't have to ask you what to do what to say. I'm so free. I'm so brave. So tonight, be like me. Just lift your hands and say, Yeah, tonight I'm going to be as free as birds are, fly away. No matter where or how far tonight I'm going to switch up the way things are. Tear down these walls and break away. I'll do time for my crime if I'm wrong, but I'm right. No need to speak for me. I fight my own fight. I came here by myself. And I'm leaving out the same way. Only I can save me. So I'm going to take my chances. Try it out. Try it out. You should try it out. You really should. Because I'm happy here. I'm feeling good here. I'm happy here. Those words are by Rosie crane. And the song is called psycho. It is my go to song for today's subject on this podcast, which is doubt, doubt. We all experience it. Why is it such a powerful feeling or emotion in our experience? That's what we're going to talk about today. So let's do this. I don't know about you. There's been so many times in my life experience where I have been so excited about an idea, something that's come to me that I really felt was divine, something that I really resonated with. And there was no question in my mind that this is what I'm supposed to be doing or an action I'm supposed to be taking or conversation I need to be having, etc. You get my vibe. And then and then I have a conversation about this idea. This good feeling space that I'm in with a person who is not necessarily ready to receive it. So I go from this really high flying, connected intended energy space to because their response to this fantastic idea is, that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard of, you're gonna lose all your money. You'll never make any money doing that. Nobody's interested in that idea. It goes on and on and on. And then I'll check in and think, why did I go there? Why am I seeking someone else's approval? Now sometimes it's just fun to share. And I'm pretty particular about who I share that kind of thing with because I've learned the hard way that it can really impact me it can take me into a not so feel, you know not so good feeling space quickly. And I don't want to go there. Right now. I'm not saying that I don't value other people's input and that it hasn't really helped me to look at things from a different perspective and maybe tweak my plan. But I have clearly learned to be careful about who I choose to share this kind of thing with and when the timing is key. Because that doubt will creep in like that.

Jani Roberts:

And I find myself again just spiraling down. So what is that? Now it's all about, it's connected to old beliefs. And it triggers those old beliefs down. Let's say, for example, I've worked through a lot of my doubt, I had a lot of doubt about my own ability to do XYZ. Because I had people in my life experience telling me, you know, I was a loser, and I was never gonna frickin do anything with my life, for example. So I've got this old belief that I've shut down, I've created new beliefs, I'm now knowing that I can, and I will. And I want to, and it's all possible. But when I have those conversations, and I don't prepay them, and I'll get into that a little bit, I don't set myself up well, for those conversations, they can really take me in the opposite direction of where I want to go, can you relate to this, this is why this song may be I'm psycho, it really works for me, because that's how I feel. And I get in that whirlwind. And we use it in our moving meditation, it's perfect for this particular feeling or emotion of doubt, to dump that. So I may have this conversation with someone and I start spiraling, but because of the work that I've been doing, I can get out in front of that, and I don't stop myself from doing what I intended to do. so powerfully, I don't bail anymore. I used to just bail. Now I have to, you know, back it up and reset and do some work, but I don't lose my intention completely. So that's huge, right? I go to that moving meditation, I work on that doubt. I look at it with a friendly, loving attitude. Okay, some doubt came in, okay. What can I gain from this experience? It's normal for the doubt to come in. Because what supports doubt? And yes, it is a four letter word. Fear, right? Fear is something that really stimulates doubt. Now, these episodes of doubt, are not unusual, they're quite common. And when we get into this practice, which really, truly is a spiritual journey, it's a physical journey as well. It's an emotional journey. It's a mental journey. But it's also spiritually grounded. Obviously. That part, for many can feel shaky. I don't know if I can trust the universe, trust the universe with them. Does that mean? How do I do it? How do I trust myself to trust myself? How do I trust the universe? How do I know that the universe has my back? And that's it. We want we want the promise before the before the experience like well, if you can promise me that this is not going to be painful. I'll do it. Yeah, it doesn't exactly work that way, as we all know. And would we really want it to work that way, really, because we expand and we grow so much, through the processes that we go through? When I had these situations happen to me, and I was having these conversations with, you know, maybe I didn't make the greatest choice out of who I selected to share with and, you know, sometimes it was just because I was so excited. I wanted to tell everybody. And then I learned, stay quiet. Stay connected, don't reach outside of yourself for approval. Hmm. So somewhere in there, there was already a little doubt, because I felt the need to either get some kind of acknowledgement or confirmation outside of myself. Or perhaps there was a bit of ego there where I wanted someone to say, Wow, great idea. I don't know, maybe a little bit of both. But my point is, we need to be selected, we need to think about who we're having these conversations with and why. What do we want the outcome to be? We can pre pave that. We can really think about who it is that we're communicating with, around these very, very important topics. Because these topics are directly connected to our intention, our joy, our purpose, all of that good stuff. All of that good stuff. So we want to find that balance. And what we can do through this understanding is realize that it's important

Jani Roberts:

to acknowledge out loud to ourselves, perhaps we can always do it inwardly that we don't need anyone else's approval and If we continue to feel that we do, then that is a phenomenal indicator where, for us as to where we need to give our attention, what work needs to be done, we need to go in why do I still need approval from other people? What is that all about? And I'm not saying you can't celebrate with others. They can't be on board with your ideas. Of course they can be. But that's different. Then seeking their approval. And then doubting that we're going to get it or doubting that we can do it without some type of outside approval. The only approval we need is from source and ourselves. And we can easily ask for that, we can go in and just say, hey, how does this feel? How does it really feel? Why am I doing it? Am I doing it because I feel like I'll get attention from other people or because I, you know, again, ego getting in there like I want, I want people to know who I am and, and what I'm all about. Okay, that's human nature to some degree. But we all know it doesn't work that way. Because people are, each and every person is trying to do that for themself as well. So it's not their job to approve or disapprove of us, people. Straight up. I know a lot of people who think that's their job. Like, you need to know what I think about you. And I find that hilarious. But it is fun. When you're grounded to say, really? And what do you think about me, I mean, that's really kind of fun. But you need to be grounded for it to be fun. Otherwise, it can stimulate a shit ton of doubt. And that is not the intention of this conversation. The intention of this conversation is just the opposite, is to ground us in knowing that doubt is just something to spectate. It's so normal. It's so easy to work with, Oh, little doubt. Okay. Let me send myself some love. Let me pay attention. Where is it coming from? What is it trying to teach me? Well, you know, you tried to do this hear from the voices, you tried to do this kind of thing before, and it was a complete posture, you know, you're just gonna fail again, whoa, whoa, they're old belief system calm down. That was then this is now what I did before. educated me to understand what I want to do should do, will do will align with the next time I step into a similar project, situation, experience, whatever it might be, it's all valuable. So there's no guilt, or I can't believe I let that person do that. To me. They're, they're now really leaning towards blame. Again, there's none of that. We just observe. Interesting. Interesting. And doubt is one of those. I don't know if you've noticed, it's one of those feelings that it can just multiply, that the intensity of that feeling can multiply quickly. If you get into a conversation with someone and they're like, Yeah, I don't know if I do that. And, and I say, Well, why and they give me some really good reasons. And then I start buying in and the next thing I know, I'm agreeing with them. I'm not just listening, observing, sifting and sorting, jotting down what I find valuable. What they're saying and then discarding the rest, I'm just buying in to their perception and their belief system, which is probably connected to their own personal doubt. Uh huh. There it is. If I'm in a really doubtful state of mind, it is tempting to hang out with other people who are also in a very doubtful state of mind, and kind of blaming other people because they're not doing what they really internally feel led to do. There's just too much doubt there's too much fear. Or is there? Or is that simply an illusion? Is that just bullshit? Is it simply an old belief system that I have been triggered back into and no one is going to be able to look at this from your perspective, or for me, from my perspective, because they're just not walking in your shoes, not completely. You might have a lot in common, but they are not walking your walk.

Jani Roberts:

We all need to have something and I don't mean a thing isn't a tangible thing. Something to I aspire to. And that is people will someday I need something to live for. That's a little dramatic, I get what they're saying. But, you know, that's why we attach to projects and work and, and family and and community as I need to be involved, I need to be connected, I need to be passionate about something, I don't want to just kind of check off the days on the calendar. But in order to do that, I've got to trust I've got to trust that when I ask for guidance, when I ask for direction for answers, that I'm going to get them and that I can stimulate those answers to come from within, I have to trust that I have to know that that is possible. I can do that. I absolutely can do that. And I'm talking about you when i say i Alright, so together say this, I absolutely can and you fill in the blank. I absolutely can write that book, I absolutely can self publish that book. I have no idea what I'm doing. So what nobody has any idea what they're doing when they first try something or even the second third fourth time is go for it anyway. So much more fun to give it a shot. If we can learn to release expectation. And if we can learn to perhaps, perhaps keep this a little bit more to ourselves and or being more selective with who we share these thoughts and ideas with and why we are going to experience something incredible, something really incredible. That is the trust that we can hold sacredly for the universe, and the fact that the universe does have our back and that we are worthy of receiving whatever it is that we desire, or do we doubt that? Oh, I could do it. But I don't really know if I deserve it. Okay. There's a flag, no judgment, but there's a flag, I can get that done. But I don't really know, you know, this is this is when we get in our own way. We simply get in our own way and start talking ourselves out of what is innately ours. For whatever reason, there's a level of self sabotage. When we do this work, and we line up and we can feel, without any hesitation or doubt that we are in our zone, our zone of genius that only each of us has, cannot be duplicated by another human being not identically. When we're in that flow, other people might think we are psycho, or a little out of touch, they might say you're delusional. You're shotglass away from insane. Don't be so foolish. You're you're just disconnected from reality. We can smile. And an understand that clearly. Those are all compliments. Clearly, they are indicators that we are on task if we've done the work, because then we get to decide how we process that we don't buy into anyone else's belief system because it is our life. It is our voice. It is our mind. We can do whatever we want, including, believe what they're saying that we'll never get it done. That it's ridiculous. Well, what if we're not doing it to get it done? What if we're not doing it for money? What if we're not doing it for any other reason, but the joy of doing it? And whatever comes through that? Great, awesome, nothing but gratitude, nothing but appreciation for that. I'm sure there'll be more surprises on the other side. But I'm intended to do this because? Well, mostly because I'm going to feel good in the doing of it. I'm going to be buzzin

Jani Roberts:

I'm going to be in my zone while I'm doing it. So why wouldn't I do that? It will free my mind. It will change things and I want things to change, I embrace change. And I'm knowing I can't get it wrong. But if I'm in your mind wrong, I'm okay with that. Because I'm also right. I'm always write for trying. I don't need anyone else. To speak for me. Write that down, say it out loud with me. I don't need anybody to speak for me. I can use my voice. I came in by myself, I go out by myself, I got this. And I'm the only one that can ensure that I do have it. I gotta take the chances. I've got to do the work. Nobody else can do it for us. So what are you going to do with this? I say get try it out. Try it out. Give it a shot. Be playful about it. And I think what you'll find is that you are happier. You are feeling good. Like that doubt, go throw it out of your mind. Release it, smile at it. Embrace it. Allow it to provide you with clarity. There is nothing to fear. Nothing to fear. By friends. There's nothing to be doubtful about. We've got this and use your voice. Speak your truth and do whatever it is that you came here to do. Sending you nothing but love, always so grateful and in such a state of appreciation to be able to be here with you and share this work with you. Until next time, again. Nothing but love and absolutely no doubt about you your intention. And I can't wait to see what kind of magic you work be well warriors be well, we'll talk next time peace.