Unstoppable Voice with Ly Smith | DFS 388

Lee, welcome to Destin for success. I'm your

host, Jennifer Takagi, and I'm so excited to have my friend Lee

Smith here with me today. Lee and I met in person several

years ago, and it's very interesting when you actually

meet somebody in person first, instead of, you know, through a

camera. But we met in person first. She's been on the show

before, and like all entrepreneurs made a few little

twists and turns in her business, minor tweaks, but

major impact. And today, Lee's going to share with us

unstoppable voice. Master your self talk. Unlike I can talk,

I'm a professional, unlike your genius gifts and greatness. I

love it. Lee comes up with the best acronyms, and I'm sure

we'll hear a little about her candy method at some point

through this. Lee, welcome back to the show. I'm so excited to

see you again.

Thank you. Jennifer, so great to be here with you

too. I just I love spending time with you, and having that

positive exchange of energy is awesome, and it makes my day.

And this is an early start to my day, but you know what next to

waking up to next to my husband? I think this is the best way to

make it happen. Thank you.

Here's that sweet, because my husband's

still in bed too. It's a little later here, not much, but he and

the dog are still and the cat is hiding in here away from the

dog. So I have it all going on today in my so I know you've had

quite an amazing journey on becoming a professional speaker,

and the the gifts that you share with your with your clients, and

also on podcast with your with the audiences. How did you

become so passionate about this, and what do you have today on

our unleashing our voice?

Oh gosh, thank you. Jennifer. I really love sharing

this story, and I am so passionate about public speaking

because I fell in love with it at the right young age of eight

years old. I was at that time. I was, I was an excellent reader.

I was an early reader. I apparently articulated well. And

my, my teachers were like, oh, Lee, you're such an amazing

reader. Would you? Would you read the scriptures at a at a

service sometime, and I, I just said, Sure. I said, Sure. Didn't

think anything of it. Didn't think, Oh, I'm going to be

getting up in front of 300 to 500 people. And had no qualms

with it whatsoever. And I got up and I and I read the reading,

and I'm looking out at all of these sets of eyes at me, and

they're smiling and and all was good, and that was all fine. The

real magic happened for me when I walked away from the quote,

unquote, stage, and there was this, like little quiver that

went through me. And it was so exhilarating. I thought, what is

that feeling? And how do I get more of that all of these years

later? It's funny, well, of course people are going to be

looking at me and smiling at me because, hey, I was a cute

little girl when I was doing something special. Why wouldn't

you look at her and smile, right? And that little quiver? I

could have mistaken that for stage fright. I could have given

it a meaning of, like, that's a little scary, but I gave it a

meaning of this is exciting, this feels good. And I have been

chasing that feeling again and again ever since all of these

years later. What do I have to speak about? Well, it's it's

sharing my stories of the lessons I've learned in my 50

plus years. I'm not afraid to share that. And I've been

through some stuff. I've been through some horrible stories,

even suicidal thoughts and attempts. I've been through

amazing journeys in life, adventures I could share my

stories of of like coming into a blended marriage and the the

dynamics that happen there being a stepmom, being a stay at home

mom, and then taking the adventure, the wildest

adventure, it seems like being an entrepreneur, and taking that

out into the world. And because I love speaking, I've learned

that being part of the speaking industry means you need to have

something to offer. And I thought, Well, okay, I have all

these stories I can share, but what is it that I can really

teach? And then I thought, Well, okay, yes, I have my academics

that I've done, but I've done personal growth development for

over 30 years. It started with Tony Robbins and personal power,

and then Zig Ziglar og mandino, Bob Proctor, John Maxwell, all

these amazing teachers, and as the years have progressed, I

came into Brendan burchard's world, and I love him and high

performance habits, and then thank goodness we have the women

stepping up, because then I've learned from Brene Brown and Mel

Robbins and Marie forley. Know, and I've taken all of their

teachings, aligned it with what I've experienced in life and my

psychology studies from my academic days, and thought,

well, how can I put this all together? And I've learned in my

personal journey, what's really need to change for me is that

little voice inside your head that sometime is screaming at

you, you're not good enough. And I'm like, Oh yes, I am.

What makes you think I remember I wrote my

first book and it's short. Like, I write short books, they're

super powerful, but they're short. And a friend of mine

looked at me. He goes, I read that, like, really fast. Like,

was it even a book? And I was like, I didn't even have my own

negative thoughts. I was like, battling someone else's and I

was like, did you write a book? Did you did you upload it to

Amazon? Did you promote it? No, it's a

book, right? Sometimes you have to do that for yourself

and your own head.

Absolutely, absolutely and so I've, I've learned along

the way through the ups and downs of life, the ups and downs

of the entrepreneurial journey, the loop, the loops and all of

that. Is that it, for me, it comes down to that voice and can

we shush? We women like to shush, don't we? Can we shush

the inner critic? And can we allow our positive, empowering

voice to say, yes, you've got this. We you and I are in

speakers Playhouse together, and we hear Kim blue, see on the

time. You know, when somebody gives you the mic, you say yes,

and you just grab it and go and and learn from the process. And

so that's what I'm all about now, is like, Okay, I'm going to

grab the mic wherever I can, and then I am going to shush that

inner critic, and I'm going to help high achieving women,

because I know so many of us out in the world, and we look

amazing on paper. We've got awards and accolades on the

outside, there's all this amazingness going on, and yet

inside, we're dealing with imposter syndrome,

procrastination. We're thinking, why am I not as far along as I

think I should be? And all of those things that come up for us

in we get in this little stuck place. And my mentor shared this

with me yesterday, and I thought it was a wonderful analogy. It's

like being on rapids, and like, we're going on on rapids, we're

doing our thing, we're in this adventure, and we're having fun,

and then we get into kind of this whirlpool, and we're stuck

in there, and all we're doing is like, how do I get out of this

whirlpool? How do I get out of this whirlpool? And really, what

we need to do is stop that whirlpool of negative inner

critic talk, and look at where do we want to go? And then point

ourselves in that direction and say, Okay, I've got this put in

that action. And then we're in that. We're out of that

Whirlpool, and we're in the direction towards our goal

again, and hopefully having fun in it. Yeah, we're going to get

splashed with a little bit of stuff, but we're going to keep

going. We're going to we have fun with it. So if I can help

those women do that, that's, that's what I'm that's, that's

what I was put on the planet to do. So that's why I'm here with

you today.

Jennifer, Well, the interesting thing about

that, and I love the analogy, and you tell such great stories,

is like, okay, yeah, I can feel that I'm in the water, I'm in

the rapids, I'm caught in that Whirlpool. I can feel all of

that. The thing that always strikes me is, and there's a lot

of studies out there on this. There are a lot of studies out

there on this where if a man gets a job application, and

there are 10 qualifying ranking factors. And he meets say three.

He's like, Oh, I've got this I'll get this job. Yeah, a woman

can meet nine of the 10 and literally say I can't apply for

that. Like, no. And I remember once I heard that, I was like,

holy, crap. Holy I think that's so true. I remember sitting down

with my dad, and he brought me a job application at one point,

and I read through it, and I said, Dad, I can't qualify for

this, like, I don't have and it was like, Yes, you do. Let's

work on it. But that was a difference between men being

raised, you can do anything, and women is you can do anything,

but in this box, and now, when you're breaking out of that box,

then all the doubt and all the all the weight, am I good

enough? Wait, I don't meet 10 qualifications. I only meet

nine. Should I even apply? And the answer is yes. We're going

to say that hardcore and firmly, yes,

right, that's right. And that that aligns with, with

with my mission and and I love sharing this because it's a fun

visual, and everybody has it has a great time with it. And that

is my transformation. Whoa, oh, they're getting excited there.

Okay, I love it. And so this is, this is the transformation that

I am working on with with my audiences and with my clients,

and that is transforming the reactor. Who was the reactor?

The reactor could be the person who is chasing after her goals,

and she is busy, busy, busy. Did I mention that she's busy doing

all the things, and if she's a mom or a wife, I'm an empty

nester now, and so yes, I'm a mom, and I don't I don't even

have the fur babies either, but I still feel busy because I'm

taking care of the home and I'm taking care of my husband, and

then we're reacting to the demands of the day. We're

reacting to what we think society thinks they're expecting

of us. We're reacting to so many things, and then we're also got

the to do list and the daily cycles and all that, and like

the letter C in reactor, we see ourselves stuck in the middle of

all the things, and maybe we're not aware of it. We might be

living by circumstances and convenience, and because we're

so busy, we're exhausted at the end of the day, and we're

thinking, do I really get to wake up and do this all over

again tomorrow? And what I challenge you to do is, if

you're feeling all that busyness, take a breather. Take

a pause. It could be for a minute, 30 minutes, maybe a half

day, or even a full day, and take yourself out from the

middle of all those things and see yourself like the letter C

and reactor. See yourself for the amazingness and the

brilliance that you really are. Who are you? And see yourself

for your three G's. What are the three G's, that's your genius,

your gifts and your greatness that you get to take out into

the world. And the three G's, they are unique to you. And I

liken it to a cell phone number. There are 8 billion people

across the planet, and 90 to 95% of us have a cell phone, which

means we have a cell phone number, and so all of these

people, we have the digits zero through nine in common, but yet,

no two numbers are exactly alike. Isn't that fascinating?

Same thing with the three G's. You might be like, Oh well,

somebody who's just as smart in this subject as I am, yeah, may

I mean, or they know the same type of subject, and maybe

they're not at the same level smartest you're just thinking

that. And your gifts are are the ways that you get to express

yourself, and then your greatness is your essence. And

so there may be some overlap that you see with other people,

but when you put the 3g together, it's unique just to

you, and when you can see those things first, Jennifer and you

put yourself first, that's where the transformation happens,

because when you put the letter C in front of the rest of the

letters, you are now transforming from the reactor

into a creator. You are no longer living by the

circumstances and conveniences you are living by clarity of

what matters most, what aligns with what I intend to do, and

then you commit to the processes only mean meaning you set

boundaries you use the power of no so that you have an even more

powerful yes to move forward towards your goals, and then

yeah, you're not so busy. You're more productive because you're

doing things that move the needle. And you're going to bed

not necessarily so tired, but you are going to bed fulfilled

and satisfied, thinking, do I really get to wake up again

tomorrow and do this all over again? It's an amazing energy

shift. And so that you can it can be as simple as asking

yourself, Am I being a reactor or a creator right now and shift

in the direction that you really want to be and go and make that

happen? So that's my mission, with my story and my message.

Let's shift you from reactor into creator, because we need

more creators in the world.

Well, we do, and I have to say, for people

who are listening to this on audio only, Lee has a beautiful

little like Scrabble holder, and had the word reactor. And she

literally pulled the C out of the middle of reactor, R, E, A,

C, T, O, R, and moved it to the front to make the word creator.

So I've never been good at Scrabble, but when you pull that

out and then you moved, and I was like, dang, she does that to

me all the time, like every time we talk, you have some. Amazing.

Like, that's a gift I don't have. I'm just going to say,

yeah,

thank you. Thank you. I'm not that great at Scrabble

either, but when I saw this, I'm like, Oh, I have to do

this totally, haven't it is so it's so true.

It is so it's so important. And I, I was telling a story not

long ago that I know a woman who literally, and it's a choice,

has chosen to live her life by reacting to one crisis after

another, and never actually sets an intention to do something

differently. And so we had to, she and I had this really deep

conversation. And the next day I called and I said there was one

big thing I left out of our conversation that, you know, I

think it really took me overnight to, like, marinate in.

And I said, it goes back to that idea of you can find evidence to

support whatever you want to believe, and you have found

evidence to support this statement you made last night.

Yep, but now I can tell you 20 times where that wasn't true for

you. Like, because we're close friends, like, I know that isn't

true. I know these times it did happen, but these times it's not

so it's that whole when you're in the Creator mode, you have

chosen to step into your gifts, your genius, your greatness

versus I'm just going to react to the world and whatever

happens. But no, you can take it by the reins. Oh Lee, let's do

this together. Let's give everybody permission.

Yes, you are allowed,

permission to do this. I was at an event once

it's it. The Speaker said, Who wants to be a coach in here? And

everybody, you know, lots of people raise their hands if he

goes, poof, you're a coach. Did you know there's really nothing

that says you just can title yourself that like you don't?

They have certifications at the wazoo, and I have many of them

because I love collecting them, but it's like, you can just

decide I'm a coach and be a coach. And I was like, Holy

crap, holy I didn't know that was a thing, and it's the same

thing. You can decide today, right now, creator, what am I

going to create? How do I want to show up in the world? And I

used to do a lot of training for the great state of Oklahoma, and

a lot of it was leadership and transitioning into a supervisory

role type training, and I'd say whatever you've done in the past

is okay. You have the ability, when you walk into the office

tomorrow, to do it differently, to do it better, and it's the

same kind of thing, if you have been in a rut of just reacting

to the world and you want to make a shift and be a creator of

your own destiny, your own life. Yep, you have permission to do

that

absolutely, absolutely, and just to give a

tiny backstory of how that came for me, was I was on a 23 day

holiday vacation. Who gets that right? 23 days with my family in

Hawaii, and not Hawaii, and not just one island across four

islands. Who does that? I was given that that opportunity, and

I snatched it up and said yes, and at that time, I was 15 years

into my marriage, and it was dying there. There was not a lot

of life happening in that marriage. My stepson was grown

and out of the house, but he and I had a strained relationship.

He and his girlfriend were on the holiday with us, and my

daughter was a young teenager. And if you know girls, and at

the early teenage you know there's, there was a lot

happening there. And I was a stay at home mom at that time. I

was not working any type of business. I was a stay at home

mom, and I was doing all the things, right, the React, doing

all the things, and I was exhausted, and I was tired, and

it was this one particular sunset that I was watching, and

it was there was there was a little bit of a magic to to that

evening. And I remember thinking, I'm doing something

that not everybody gets to do, even once in their lifetime.

Most people don't even make it to one island of Hawaii, let

alone four. And then I and then I thought, well, this is so

beautiful. And I thought, and I thought, and I thought Jennifer,

and I was not feeling anything, and when I got that awareness,

it was a whole what is happening right now, because I'm. A person

who feels I'm a person who really just gets so involved in

life because I want to grab every moment of it. It's too

short otherwise. But at that time, I was stuck in my own

rapid of doing all the things, and I explained it as I was

covered in just I was just a wife, I was just a stay at home

mom, I was just a stepmom. I was just this shell of a woman

standing on a shore with her family, wondering, who am I? And

it was in later transformation of myself, because I made a

decision that day like no more, this is not happening. I am

going on a quest to go, who am I? Who is Lee Smith? I really

did not know who she was at that time. And then when the

transformation happened, and I thought, well, this is how I can

create the story and the power my impact in the world. And I

was like, Oh, well, I was reacting, but that day, I made

that decision to change, and I'm going to go on this quest, and

I'm going to recreate myself and and it was remembering that

eight year old inner child. Remember public speaking,

remember how we love that feeling, let's go chasing that

again, and that's where, where the rest of it fell into place.

And we learned from our thought leaders like Tony Robbins and

Brendan Burchard and Mel Robbins that we have that power of

choice. We can choose to react to whatever comes our way or

even inside of us, or we can choose to respond. And I found

this, this demonstrative way of explaining it, so that people

can use it as a real tool to create that 32nd or 92nd shift

from the reactor to creator. So I wanted to share that little,

little backstory there, because I, like, I rose out of that

depression. I was like, Nope, no more, no more. Going down that

journey like, No, we're going to we're going to be happy and

fulfilled myself and for everybody

watching and listening. Oh my gosh, I love

that. Okay, so you have so many things going on, how? And I mean

for the audience, I know women are going, Yeah, I want more of

Lee, how do people work with you? What do you have? And of

course, all this will be in the show notes, but tell us, like,

how do you work with clients?

Yes, because I because I love the g3 concept, because I

believe so much that when you really like, when I remembered

who I am, and that I looked at my genius and I looked at my

gifts and I looked at my greatness, what can I take out

into the world? And for me, my world is the whole world that

may not be the situation for you, and that's okay, because

your world can be yourself, rejuvenating just yourself as an

individual. Your world can be your family. Your world can be

your community, whatever it happens to be. But I fully

believe that when you can recognize and remember and

unlock What's the g3 for you, then you come alive, and then

together, we can figure out how you can take that into the world

or take it to the next level, because I said you're already

successful, right? We have the proof in the pudding with your

leadership role, with your position, with your awards, the

success you're already making. But how do we get you to fully

believe and embrace that? So I do that in my g3 mastermind.

It's an online community found on the school platform. If you

haven't heard of that before, it's s, k, O, O, l.com, and it's

a beautiful platform. If you're familiar with Facebook, it's

like a Facebook group without the Facebook noise, and I like

it so much better. And so that we can have this engaged

community, what are you going to find inside of that g3

mastermind online space. Well, first, Monday through Friday,

you're going to get pieces pun intended of my candy method. And

the candy method is clarity, affirmation, necessity,

discipline, you and because that aligns into five pieces. Then

Monday through Friday, you get a respective piece that helps you

think about what's happening in your life or in your mind right

now. And then, I always end up with a question, either for you

to self reflect, you can journal it, or you can share that within

the group. And the more that we share with one another, the more

we all grow together. And if you're in a stuck place, it

helps to create a shift. I also have a gift in there called the

daily empowerment 21 day challenge. And 21 because it

it's five to 10 Minute pieces daily that, again, takes you a

little bit deeper in the candy method, and it's just a journey

for yourself. And so that you can, you can really experience

the shift. And then I also have a coffee connection once a

month, social hours, so we can come together and put our names

and faces together, and we can just kick it back as ladies.

Okay, so what's happening? How's life going? And it doesn't have

to necessarily be a. Coaching session, but it's just a safe

place to come together. If that's all free for you, that's

in my freemium level. If you want to take it to another level

and really experience the mastermind, well then you can

come into the paid membership where you can experience the

mastermind when you do get a bit of coaching and Hot Seat

experience. And this is where I'm going to use my life

coaching skills, my NLP skills, and I am also using my rapid

rewire skills that gives you that quick transformation, but

it's also longer lasting, and I'm so excited to add this to my

repertoire, and then we have a an accountability hour, where

you come together with your action item and we say, this is

what I'm going to work on. So we were there in with our

individual pieces, but we're in that group setting, and we turn

off the cameras and the microphones, go do the thing,

and then we come back and we celebrate, or if somebody's

still really stuck. There's just a little bit of coaching, but

you have that forward movement because we want to get past the

resistance, get past that again. We're shushing the inner critic

and really empowering that positive voice so that we can do

the things that really matter to us, continue the creation. And

then there's also, because it's a paid membership, I have an

affiliate when when in there for you as well, so that, as you

refer other members who come into the paid membership, I'm

going to give you a 30% affiliate commission for that,

so that could be paying for your membership, or it could be

another revenue stream. And who doesn't want that, right? So

that we continue to grow this community, and it's global. It's

open to, you know, women all over all over the world, who are

wanting to take this next level of themselves, and they just

want a little bit of help to make it happen. So we come

together to connect, collaborate and to celebrate one another,

and then we're going to be building this out so that not

only are we working together online, we can come together

annually for two or three day retreats, and I'm so excited to

start putting that together too. And so that's the g3 inner

circle for now, everybody listening, I simply invite you

to go to g3 mastermind.com so the letter G, the number three

mastermind.com that's going to take you directly into the free

community. Come and check it out. I would love to see you

there, and I look forward to working with you so that we

continue more transformations of reactors to creators.

Oh my gosh Lee, this has been so lovely. I love

spending time with you, and I love g3 methodology. So

everybody jump on board with a g3 mastermind. Lee, it was great

spending time with you and sisters. I look forward to

connecting with you soon.

Absolutely. Thank you.