New Episodes Every Tuesday!
April 11, 2023

Exploring Polyamory: How to find Security in Non-Monogamy - with Jessica Fern | Awakened Love EP 25

Exploring Polyamory: How to find Security in Non-Monogamy - with Jessica Fern | Awakened Love EP 25

Psychotherapist, coach and author of "Polysecure" Jessica Fern joins us for an exploration of all the possible ways we can explore consensual non-monogamy in a ways that allow us the experience of both emotional security and personal freedom.

She walks us through the difference between structural and emotional security, how polyamorous families can be incredibly supportive for the development of children, the challenges of navigating relational insecurity, and the liberating gift of compersion – the ability to find joy in watching someone you love receive pleasure from someone other than you.

This episode is full of enlightening and expansive views on relationships. Let us know what resonates with you in the comments!



0:00 Intro

1:35 What Consensual Non-monogamy is

5:00 "Don’t Ask Don’t Tell"

7:37 Structure vs Quality of Relationship

9:49 Exposing Relational Insecurity

13:21 From Comparison to Compersion

17:06 Toxicity in Polyamory

21:58 Polyamorous Families

23:55 Hierarchy in Polyamory

27:02 Challenges of Non-monogamy

34:20 Attachment Figures

38:36 Safe Havens and Secure Bases

43:30 Managing Tension in Relationship



Jessica Fern is a Psychotherapist, Coach, and Certified Clinical Trauma Professional. Jessica is the author of Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma, and Non-Monomgamy and The Polyseucre Workbook: Healing Your Attachment and Creating Security in Loving Relationships. In her international private practice, Jessica works with individuals, couples, and people in multiple-partner relationships who no longer want to be limited by their reactive patterns, cultural conditioning, insecure attachment styles, and past traumas, helping them to embody new possibilities in life and love.


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