Cuida tu familia

0:00 Bomba, why the affective relationships I have are not stable. I like assertiveness because it invites us to prudence that what should motivate our word is always love is you and that is already the basis to go out to conquer many goals, to fight, to give a better version and enjoy life fully. You know happiness depends on the quality of our relationships. As long as you have healthy ties, you can live in well- being, you can have that attitude that makes you overcome difficulties, that makes you live happily in the midst of the conditions of daily life. One of the foundational mental bonds of all existence is the family. That' s why today I want to talk to you about taking care of the family and how you take care of the family by generating very healthy habits in your relationships. Now I have to say that the family is the one you have, not the perfect family, because that doesn' t exist. Sometimes, because we are talking about the ideal of the family, we stop valuing reality, the people around us who are the

1:34 ones who really form what we call family. I like to define the family, not from the roles, not from the members, but I like to understand the family as that intimate circle of protection, of care, of affection with which I count to build my existence. If you want to take care of that context, that inner circle, you must have some family habits. I propose five habits. The first is that of accurate communication. We need to know how to talk and we need to know how to hear that sounds so simple, so obvious, it becomes a problem in everyday life. Many of the difficulties of the family occur because we do not know how to speak, because we do not know how to tell the truth with the right words, with the emotions indicated in the places and in the right times. Many of us, when we try to communicate a truth, generate a situation of pain, sadness, anger that does not make the bond healthy. But we also find it hard to listen, we find it hard to focus on what the other person says now. Communicating is not imposing a truth. Communicating implies

3:10 these actions, generating consensus, understanding what is best and knowing what interests are being brought together. First habit assertive communication, you take care of your family. When you take care of your communication when you strive to make that communication fluid and allow relationships to develop and achieve the purposes. A second habit is to have clear limits, healthy limits. We' re family, but that doesn' t mean we can invade each other. That doesn' t mean we can trample on each other' s dignity. Limits have to be set, and limits have to do with four realities for me. A dignity, no word, no action can call into question the dignity of the other person.

4:16 I take care of my family, when I take care of my dignity and when I take care of the dignity of the other two, the boundaries are connected with intimacy. I cannot invade the personal spaces, the essential original spaces. Everyone has the right to privacy and to be a family. It doesn' t empower me to go in and out and get me into all three. The limits have to do with the abilities and have to do with the abilities of others. I can' t disable them, I can' t block them sometimes believing that it' s the best. We express affection as overprotection and end up blocking others and not allowing them to be and not allow them to develop. And the fourth dimension to me with which the boundaries are linked is respect. What has to do with the difference, what has to do with assuming that we are not all equal, that we do not all have the same tastes, that we do not all like the same.

5:29 It' s that simple. Please, when you learn this you are able to build a family that helps, what drives, what accompanies, what supports. The third key, or the third habit, is to be clear on responsibilities. We must assign responsibilities as well as ask for freedom, as well as ask for the possibility of making our own decisions. We also need to know what our duties are, what our responsibilities are. I' m thinking that many times dads, for example, don' t teach their kids responsibilities and they think they love them. It is to make them irresponsible emperor monarchs who all have it and who must answer nothing. You have to be very careful with that. I ask, I demand, I have rights, but I also have duties and responsibilities. They have to be assigned and they have to be very explicit and everyone has to assume them in order to move forward.

6:34 Another habit, the physical encounter. I understand the digital connection, I understand the networks, I understand everything technology brings us. But it is necessary to meet, it is necessary to look us in the eyes, it is necessary to touch us, it is necessary to caress us, It is necessary that there be a hug, that there is a beautiful word, that touches the soul, that touches the life of the other person. Please, we need those meetings then where we sit at the table to eat a zancoche, if it were the Colombian Caribbean. Or I don' t know if it ' s a dinner, or I don' t know if it' s a birthday party, but moments to share, for those forum spaces where we express what we' re living in, where we say what' s in our heart. Physical experiences, physical encounters are very important, because if we do not end up distancing ourselves, sometimes we end up very connected, but very distant. I like it when some say that technology connects us but sometimes it doesn' t allow us to meet. And then that' s a point to keep in mind. And one last, one last habit is that of spiritual experiences. I believe in the power of spirituality, in that ability to connect us from values, from meaning, from meanings, from the sublime, from transcendent, that gathering us together to wish us the best, that gathering together to accompany us in a transcendent dimension, in a dimension of love,

8:11 in a dimension that goes beyond what is useful, that goes beyond the pragmatic, that goes beyond what we are able to do or have. That is why it is important that there are spiritual practices that have to do with the existential rites that we have, which have to do with the celebratory moments of life. Sometimes they go through religious experiences, sometimes they don' t, because if religion divides, it can' t be a habit to keep in mind. If religion causes problems between us, the members of the family, we have to be careful, because the truth, I believe that the love of the family is worth more than any dogma, it is worth more than any religious experience raised in such or such a way that I put those habits through them. Understand who your family is Take care of your family Don ' t forget. Happiness is determined by the quality of the bonds and you deserve to have healthy links, links in which you feel, which add value, which they bring to you, which they care for you and which give you affection. That' s fundamental to living. I keep recommending to them the orational El Man is alive. I keep recommending the book The Man is alive and is with you, and I keep inviting you to be sharing these simple reflections, those reflections that seek to connect and push you forward. Thanks for being there. We' re in Apple, we' re in Amazon,

9:43 we' re in desert, we' re in Spotify. You know.