Why Most Men Are Overwhelmed (And What Actually Works)

speaker-0: What is up y'all we are back in the house again, I'm your your man Big Mike

speaker-1: There you go. ⁓ Finally. Then grew up. And I'm Yeah, yeah, I'm right. I'm just gonna jump in because usually there's a pause there and I mess it up. So I'm just gonna cut you off.

speaker-0: I was gonna build you up a little bit. It's too late now. It's too late now. And I am next to an amazing brother, the co-host. an honorable mention.

speaker-1: Okay. Now it's my turn. Honorable mention though, that's like you didn't get first, second, or third place. They just was like, yeah, we don't want to hurt his feelings. So he got honorable mention. That's cool. No, I'll take it.

speaker-0: I Throw a little shade in there. I wasn't say honorable man, but then you had said the things that you said before I was going to say that. And I was like, well, you get an honorable mention now.

speaker-1: Okay, I'll take it. I'll take it as long as I mention. That's all that matters, right? They mention my name and I make it happen after that. I am Rod, the second part of this podcast. And I'm proud that Mike actually said, you know, the man part of it, because this is grown man game podcast. He said, your boy, Mike. And as you know, boy is a white racist word. No, just had a little flashback.

speaker-0: speaking the truth. Now if y'all want to unfollow us, go ahead. didn't need you.

speaker-1: That's funny. So, side note, we'll get back to it. I was ⁓ looking at my followers and I'm like, damn, man, it's not really moving. ⁓ Like it's been kind of around the same number for a while. But when you look at the analytics, it'll show like followers and it'll show the percentage that it's up or whatever. And so related to last month, it was up like,

speaker-0: Mmm.

speaker-1: 20 % or 30%, I don't know. I really don't know the number, but it was up some percentage, right? It was in the green. But I'm like, damn, how is it up? It was like 4,000 or something like that. I'm how am I up 4,000 followers, but still the same number of followers? And I look at my unfollows, I was like, I don't know what I said on this day, but people was like, nah, fuck with me that day. I lost like 3,000 followers. I'm like, oh man. just breaking even, but it's cool though. You know who's for you is for you and who ain't you know, yeah people people following your president So, you know people could follow him people following

speaker-0: Look, he your president too, all right? He's apparently he is Jesus so Apparently Dr. Jesus Dr. J, the real Dr. J

speaker-1: Yeah, no, hey, Dr. Jesus, know, a lot of really good people. And that's crazy.

speaker-0: Yikes. Yeah, man. That's crazy though, you know, because I've never touched 4,000 followers and you talk about gaining 4,000 or losing 4,000. Like it's nothing, but it's cool. This is the Privilege show with Roderick the Privilege ⁓ with all his followers.

speaker-1: We don't miss it. Listen, the only follower that matters is you, right? Like the one person that's listening right now that heard me say that, that's the only person that matters. Everybody else isn't just another follower, you know?

speaker-0: Hey, you just lost 10,000.

speaker-1: There we go. Hey, look. Again, whoever is for you is for you. Like I said, I don't know what I said that day. I couldn't even go back and figure out what it was. Something I posted, people was not rocking with. It is what it is.

speaker-0: It is what it is, man. Social media ain't real anyway. Real money, though. Y'all need to follow me, please. I need to get some.

speaker-1: We might as get into that early into the podcast, right? Like, okay, so, ⁓ so Mike's got a number of things going on, right? You got the damn, we going, I'll let you do it, right? Cause I know you're trying to build up the podcast. You and Tiff been back at it. Hitting heavy, ⁓ posting every day. Definitely got the content, content, ⁓ video looks good. You know, all the stuff. So, what, tell the people what you got going on.

speaker-0: Mmm, yeah Man, what I got going on, man, is I got to go to work as soon as we done with this, man. That's what's going on. All right. And if y'all don't want me to have to keep going to work, my back is sore. You know what saying? I've been going through things. Took a vacation with this brother, our families together, had a great time, but my back was toe up. All right. Now I'm not going to say I hurt my back at work, but I'll be lifting up stuff every day. It could be the cause of it, right? Yeah, for sure.

speaker-1: Could have led to it, yeah.

speaker-0: All right, work this comp, work this comp, work this comp. Nah, man, but yeah, like Rob was saying, me and my wife, Tiff, we got damn, we grown. We started that back in 2018, episode 252, probably dropping soon. ⁓ Grinding it down, then we stopped for, wow, we stopped for like a year and some change, because there was like sickness in our family with my mom. passed from cancer, so we just kind of stopped for a while and then her parents ended up passing in the same year, like the year after they both passed within the same year, within like, you know, six, seven months of each other. So it was like, you know, kind of tough to really do that podcast and going through that mourning period, you know what I'm saying? So we kind of just shut it down for a minute, but we got it back up. It was for sure a New Year's resolution for us to get this grind back cracking and we love to do it. And then this guy, you know what saying, doing this show with him really got me like, yeah, man, we need to get it back going.

speaker-1: Got the podcast, juice is flowing.

speaker-0: We got it flowing again, you know what saying? So, know, damn, we grown, it's back. yeah, having a good time, you know what saying? Watching this brother's podcast, Forfeit Fatherhood. I'm seeing, you know I'm saying? More more posts and more episodes jumping. You know I'm saying? So, we moving, we moving.

speaker-1: Yeah, yeah. Yeah, we got like a black podcast network right now. If I could only get my wife to get back on the podcast. You know what? think it's like a thing for her, like just to kind of mess with me. She's like, ⁓ we should record. And then I get to start setting up and then she'll be like, I don't really feel like it. Let's do it another day. You know what? If you put it on a schedule, I'll make sure we do it. And then something will come up and it'll be like, I don't, I'm not feeling good.

speaker-0: Wait, you put it on a schedule and it still doesn't happen? That's crazy.

speaker-1: ⁓ Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. ⁓ Mike taking shots, but he's not going to this one. He's not going to See, look, God took his voice away. He over there like a little mermaid. ⁓

speaker-0: Listen I'm gonna do just turning soft. I do want to do an episode about schedules and the way that, man, in let's just jump into it real quick. It's a quick little side note. So here's my mentality on the schedules. I'm not against schedules. I'm not. I'm not against. Man. But I am against those studs.

speaker-1: I was thinking, golly, you let your intrusive thoughts come on, man.

speaker-0: We locked in. ⁓ But I feel like with schedules, schedules are like wheelchairs or crutches, right? It's like, it's good to use every now and then to a certain point. But if I have to have the crutches in order for me to get around, I'm not going to get to where I need to be without the crutches. Does that make sense?

speaker-1: Yes, if you're injured.

speaker-0: Yeah, so...

speaker-1: or if you're not like, if you're acutely injured, not if you're chronically injured.

speaker-0: Okay. Let's say I'm acutely injured. guy's doing all this.

speaker-1: I'm just saying, like, if you rolled an ankle, you might need crutches for a couple of weeks. If your legs don't work at all, you might need a wheelchair for life. So I don't know if that analogy works. you have to put context around it.

speaker-0: It works, feels good, I like this. So I hurt my back, I just told you, I hurt my back, right? Now, the advice that I got from the doctor and this brother first was, I know it may make you feel good to just lay in bed and relax, but you have to get out the bed and you have to walk, even though it's gonna hurt, you gotta walk as much as you can, it's gonna get that blood flowing to your back and that's gonna decrease the ⁓ inflammation and yada yada yada get you back. So I feel like with a schedule, it's taking that part of your mind that you have to remember what you got to do and it's putting it on this paper or putting it on your phone nowadays, right? So that your mind does not have to do that compute anymore. So if you do that for too long, for too much, your brain is now not trained to have to remember these things and it stays sharp. Now. I do believe that it's cool to have some stuff, but if you get to a point where you have so much stuff scheduled that you have to have a calendar and put on a schedule, you're just doing too much. We weren't meant to be doing all this stuff, man.

speaker-1: So your issue is with society then, not with schedules.

speaker-0: It's a societal issue.

speaker-1: I mean, so, all right. So I understand what you're saying. My my thing with schedules is is if I am going to do all of the things that I have to do, I had to put them down somewhere because I can remember for the most part, but something's going to get lost because not only am I putting the things on the schedule, like the thing that I put on the schedule is the title of the thing within that thing. I've got 10 other things that need to be done or that have like, like, for example, so if I put work on the schedule, right? Which everybody does, whether you write it down or not, everybody has work on a schedule and automatically takes up the time of your day that you're supposed to be at work. During that time, there may be seven to eight different tasks you might have to do. And not only do you have to do those tasks, but you have to have all the skills that are associated with that task. You have to take the brain power in order to do those skills. So I'm, I'm just putting a reminder. of during this time, this is what I'm going be dedicated to. I can dedicate all my brain power to that thing during that time. And that allows me for me, right? It doesn't have to be for anybody. But for me, it allows me to be fully present in whatever is on my schedule at that time. Right? Like right now, I'm not thinking about work at all. Right. Even though I just mentioned it, I didn't have any further thoughts on like what I need to do today or whatever. And the same goes for like family time or whatever. Whatever I put on my schedule gets my attention. And I need to do it that way. So because I wear so many different hats, where I do so many different things, and I get your point, where in society, we've gotten to a point where you're responsible for a thousand things, right? And because you're responsible for all those things, and maybe you shouldn't be, maybe there should be some, you know, some other society you live in that doesn't have all these responsibilities. I don't know where that is, but maybe when we retire and we move over to, you know, some island somewhere, all we got to do is, you know, eat and...

speaker-0: Mm-hmm.

speaker-1: sleep and that's when you sleep.

speaker-0: Now you slow down and you've been used to doing so much. You know, people usually they retire and then like five years later they end up passing away because they're just used to doing pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop,

speaker-1: Uh-huh. That might be bro science. I don't know if I know that to be the case, man. I know some old retirees. Matter of fact, the people that live across the street are retired and they just, they do their thing. They have like a book club or something. be a bunch of old ladies could pull up with 52. Then they walk, right? But anyway, so my point was is that right now you have a ton of things on your plate. If you aren't scheduling them, something's going to get forgotten or

speaker-0: They were tired of

speaker-1: something's gonna bleed over and the things aren't going to get the attention that they deserve. So that's why I put everything on my schedule.

speaker-0: I feel, you know, I definitely, I get that it makes absolute sense. That's why it's like, for me, it's a societal thing. It's not just a schedule, just you thing. It's why are we putting so much in our plates? We're putting more on our plates because we're just deciding to. And we do the same with our children. You know what saying? Okay, you go to school all day. Okay, now you do this sport. You're going to do this sport. Okay, now you're in Boy Scouts, Girl Scouts, Cub Scouts, Weeblow Scouts. Okay, also you need to start doing this for the church. You got the church picnic on Sunday. After that, we're to go to da da da da da. And then it becomes natural for them. And now they have to have a schedule when they get older, because this is what natural is. I'm always, I need to be running, right? Like COVID, people had to stop and they were like, ⁓ my God, I can actually relax at the home and have a good time. Like, yeah, you don't gotta be going everywhere all day. COVID made people pause, stop, reflect, or. COVID made people go crazy. And then when COVID was over and they got back outside, they went to the Travis Scott concert and tore it down. Now we gotta find a balance. Cause we keep putting them more.

speaker-1: Okay. I can get down with balance. I think balance is probably the key there because I think it the alternative it sounds like right. It's like we talk about opposites of the spectrum, right? It's like having a bunch of things that you do and having nothing. Yeah, right. And I don't think either either side is healthy. Right. There's got to be some middle ground where you do have some time where you unplug and schedules don't matter. ⁓ I just think for me, I lean more to

speaker-0: gotta find a balance, there we go.

speaker-1: one side of it than the other. And that's just out of necessity. I don't really have, I do, but I have scheduled downtime. And so it's just funny to say, but I have it on there because I want to make sure I get it. Like today I had scheduled downtime. Like I moved stuff around and made sure I did things around this timeframe so that we had it available to do this. And then when this is over, I really don't have anything on my schedule until, you know, until later tonight when I got to put on 10 caps and be dad this and dad that. Right. So I think balance is key. Right. I think when you're you're scheduling to the point where you're overwhelmed with your own scheduling, then it might be a problem. And then I think on the flip side where you don't schedule anything and things get sacrificed or lost or don't get the attention they deserve, that's also a problem. So I think finding somewhere in the middle that exists, I think I think something that that's in It's interesting about this whole conversation is that ⁓ all of us will, to some extent, the things we consider to be priorities or important get scheduled and they don't get forgotten. Right. If you got a doctor's appointment, you don't miss the doctor's appointment, right? Because they're going to charge you probably if you don't show up, you get the no show fee ⁓ and you put it on a schedule or you put it on the refrigerator if that's your schedule, whatever. But that time gets allotted because it's important. And so for me, the things that are on my calendar are the things that are important. And then if it's not, then it doesn't make it. I don't have, like, I just don't have time for it.

speaker-0: Yeah, I agree. That's why, you know. It's gonna go longer. That's cool. I agree. I agree.

speaker-1: You got me in the loop, We got a podcast for a reason. If you want to flex it out, we flex it out.

speaker-0: I mean, I think I had said it to you. was like, the things that we put on a schedule that we want to do, we'll do them, whether they're on a schedule or not. The things that we want to do, we're going to do them. If I put on a schedule, cut the grass tomorrow, and I'm like, man, I don't feel like cutting the grass today. It don't matter that it's on a schedule. I don't really feel like cutting the grass. I'm gonna adjust my schedule now. It's gonna be something else. Even though I put it on my schedule, I'm supposed to cut the grass at 9 a.m. Saturday morning, but we woke up and Tiff and Maddie wanna go to some yard sales. You know what? Forget that grass. I cut the grass, I'm gonna get back. And then we get back, it's 12 o'clock and it's too hot now. It's 97 degrees. We supposed to be barbecuing and we supposed to be hooking out with Rod and Ari and the girls. You know what? I'll just cut it tomorrow. ⁓ wait, we supposed to go to the beach tomorrow. Yada yada. So the thing that you really want to do whether they're on the schedule or not, you gonna do them.

speaker-1: Yes. And in that scenario. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, go ahead, go ahead, go ahead. I say in that scenario, though, like it's one of those things where we're OK. So if you had a schedule for that time. If scheduling was your thing, then there would be some boundary there already set up, whereas like people would know that you had like, for example, for my schedule, like we go over our schedule weekly, we talk about it.

speaker-0: And that's it y'all. let's talk about.

speaker-1: I don't remember everything Ari got going on. it's just, it's not, it's not necessarily for me. She doesn't remember it for me either. Right. But we have at least the crossover points where we both have to be involved. We discussed and so she knows and I know. And then the pop up things is like, we just spurred a moment. Like you just came up with it. Sometimes they get done. Sometimes they don't. Right. Like, look, you know, y'all want to go to the art sale. Cool. Hit the first two without me. I'm going to cut the grass real quick. I'm going to catch up with y'all.

speaker-0: Yeah, okay.

speaker-1: Because if I don't cut the grass now, I know how the schedule looks. I'm not going be able to cut it until next week. Right. And I live with HOA. They knocking on the door after a week. The grass get a little high. My neighbor is calling. Right. And they emailing me. Right. So I can't afford that. so it's kind of like everyone has to know that that's your thing. And it's something that you have to communicate. Right. But everybody know you loose on your schedule. Then everybody's just going to tap dance on your schedule.

speaker-0: Yeah, you got one of those neighbors.

speaker-1: or lack thereof, right? Like, yeah.

speaker-0: Did I tap dance in your scare of the day brother? I'm sorry man. But you did. I was little tap bit late, maybe like an hour.

speaker-1: No, there wasn't directed at you. You tapped dance, but I was tripping because like I said, I moved everything around, so I literally didn't have anything. ⁓ like I just scheduled today because I didn't know how long if we're to do two episodes or whatever. So I was like, I'll just take the whole day and do majority of it yesterday, save a little bit for tomorrow. So that I had time after ⁓ after the girls went to school. So we did. ⁓ But I'm just saying in that instance, if something like.

speaker-0: day because all right all

speaker-1: So my family knows, right? Like if I have something scheduled, we just got it. If I can reschedule it, I'll try to, but it was on my schedule. I didn't have this planned, whatever. So y'all can go, I'll catch up with you, or I'm not going make it this time, or whatever. But I think if that isn't already set boundary, then it doesn't cause an issue, I guess. It could. It could.

speaker-0: You are a married man and a father, you know, no matter what, it's gonna be your fault. I got these free Disneyland tickets and you don't wanna go because you wanna cut the grass? Baby, you know we gotta cut the grass.

speaker-1: ⁓ yeah, yeah, yeah. Look, I'm going give it a quick cut. I'm not going to line it up, but I'm going give it a quick cut to make sure it's low. 10, 15, 20, 40 minutes, whatever, depending on how big a yard is. And then we're going to get to Disney when we get there.

speaker-0: We need to be there when it opens, Dad.

speaker-1: But you just found out this morning. you you wasn't going ever get there when it opens. This is the compromise. Yeah, they're little later because I'm teaching you that I have responsibilities and I have boundaries and things that I've set up myself. Self respect. All right. Now, you know, you know, anyway, so we can we can put a pin in that.

speaker-0: How are you doing this? Alright. Yeah. So y'all don't do schedules right said it you don't need it don't make no sense

speaker-1: Nah, that's it. Don't do it. It's like adulting. It's a two out of 10. Wouldn't I recommend. Don't do it. Yeah, for You figure out what works for you. I think that's always the answer, right? It's like the answer when somebody asks me something is it depends. Typically, it depends on the situation and then what works for you. Like what makes the most sense for you in your situation? Like I can tell you what works for me, but it don't work for everybody. And trying to do it my way.

speaker-0: Now, finite balance.

speaker-1: might end up being a disaster for you. So what makes most sense for you and probably for most people is going to be some balance. Prioritize the things that are most important, put those on your schedule, because you know you're going to show up for them. And then everything else, you just kind of, as it pops up. For example, you know when you're going on vacation.

speaker-0: Yeah, for sure

speaker-1: But outside, not outside of that, there's obviously other things that you have on your schedule. Like, you know, when you got your doctor's appointments, you know, when you're going to work, whatever. But like, the little things in between aren't as important. So then you kind of have a little bit more free rein to kind of do, you know, and that might just be your style, your personality is like, I just want to live with more free time. And if somebody like me, like I think about too much, I have too much stuff going on. I probably have undiagnosed ADD or ADHD or whatever it is, is why I'm rambling like this right now.

speaker-0: I am Monday.

speaker-1: I gotta put it down or write it down or put it somewhere. I gotta give it a physical space or else I'm gonna lose it. it's like ⁓ watching the freeway, right? Like I'm gonna catch this car and I'm only gonna be to follow up so far before it's out of sight and out of sight out of mind. So I gotta like, all right, it was a red car. Okay, cool, red car came by at this time. Otherwise I'm just gonna forget it.

speaker-0: See what schedules do to your brain, y'all? Much. Nah, nah, that makes sense, yeah, because Tiff is the same way. She has to...

speaker-1: Aspirin. Aspirin did it in his autism.

speaker-0: Damn, man, damn. She has to write stuff down. She has to visually see it. Like if I'm explaining something to her, she needs to visually see it. So I got to break it down visually so she can connect the dots with how she learns and how her brain can hold the memory or whatnot. So yeah, that makes sense. All right, so y'all don't be homie talking about you need to get the schedule. And I'm not going to be on y'all. talking about y'all need to know how to float through this life and have the energy of the Lord on you and he can guide you. Just stay with your satanic schedules.

speaker-1: It's false. That's false. Because we definitely going to be on each other no matter. But with an understanding, right? Like we understand each person's side of it. But I'm definitely going to be talking about it.

speaker-0: Yeah, for sure. ⁓ yeah, you're gonna get these jokes. is what it's all about, man. Come on. Yes, sir.

speaker-1: fire those off, right? All right, so I think, should we go congratulations or should we just jump into the group chat? I think we can go group chat and then wrap it up with congratulations.

speaker-0: Alright sounds good let's do that. So what's going on in the group chat brother?

speaker-1: A lot of stuff, man. It's been a little while, right? Like you said, we was on vacation for a week. I guess we can kind of dip into that a little bit. went on a cruise to Mexico. Really cool, really good time. Like Mike said, his back was messed up, but he made the most of it. Like if he was an outsider looking in, you wouldn't have known. He just looked like he was a little bit older. He's shuffling his feet like a pop pop. But now we had a really good time. ⁓ Caribbean, shout out to y'all. anybody in Caribbean family is watching this, we're more than willing to come on another cruise and do the podcast episode there. Make sure we hype y'all up. But we would need to get some kind of access to the cruise. So you just let me know, right? Reach out to the podcast. No, but the cruise experience is different than

speaker-0: Nah, I took that back.

speaker-1: then I remember the last time we went on a cruise ⁓ was very different than this cruise in the sense that our girls were younger. Girls are tween-agers now, or an actual teenager and tween-agers. And it was nice to have, it was almost like two vacations, right? Like we had a family vacation, but we're all together. And then we had like a couple's vacation. where we were together as adults and then we had individual couple, but like it was all wrapped up into this one because our kids were not at an age anymore where they have to be tied to us. And it wasn't like a big fear that they were gonna get lost. Cause I mean, case scenario, they was gonna go overboard, otherwise they was gonna be on the ship. We had the ability to contact them. We knew where they were like, and they got to do stuff that they wanted to do. And they didn't have to do all the stuff that we wanted to do. So I think. That was really cool. Cause I didn't know what to expect. Cause like I said, the last time we were on a cruise, they was little, right? And so we did everything together and it was like, as somebody said the other day, when you vacation with little kids, it's not vacation. It's just parenting in a different location. Right? And that's what I honestly feel. That's what it's like. It's like you go parent somewhere else, right? Cause you have some of the same responsibility. Yeah. You don't have to clean up the same way. Cause if you had a hotel or whatever, somebody else is going to clean it up. Yeah, you still got to monitor the kid and do all the things. so, yeah, so I had a really good time. I enjoyed it. ⁓ The drink package thing was kind of whack. ⁓ You know, I want to drink whatever I want to drink, but I haven't paid extra for it. But, know, that's that's the economy. You know, you got to do what they got to do.

speaker-0: No, Dr. Pepper for dear old Rod, man. Sorry.

speaker-1: Just wanted a Coke Zero, you know what I a little Coke Zero. I almost went over there to a little remix machine and did it myself. And then heard like one of little workers was standing next to us. was like, get your ass out of Let me get a Coke, bruh. Get out the way. Yeah, nah. But, okay, they have Cruz. Anything you want to add on the Cruz?

speaker-0: What are you doing, sir? $17, sir. Nah man, basically the same thing that you said. It was pretty dope, had a good time. We should probably do another one. You know what saying? Go somewhere a little bit different or do the same one or try a different company. Because we are taking ⁓ requests from different companies. ⁓ You let us know, we will talk about how amazing it is, if it is.

speaker-1: I'm sorry, but honest honest review.

speaker-0: Honest with you, depending on how much money you... You see how bald my head is? Because I use, I forgot the name of the shaver, but you know... The Flex Series 6000. Cleans up. Nah, but yeah, nah, it was really fun. Highlight for me definitely was Catalina driving around in golf carts, checking out the island. ⁓

speaker-1: You what saying? and flex here.

speaker-0: And just being able to be free and watching, you know what saying, the girls just get that freedom and also flex that responsibility. Them like, okay, you got to be back here by 11 and they, ⁓ we ran early so we can make sure we were back by 11. Okay, good.

speaker-1: Yeah, somebody beating y'all, but I don't know who it is. beating y'all. That's the way they was acting.

speaker-0: Right? But yeah, man. But yeah, yeah. Yeah, but that was dope, man. If you can get away, a cruise is like a cheaper version of a cool little vacation. Lightweight vacation. I stayed with the peppermint oil so that, you know, I wouldn't be out there. You know, but yeah, it was cool. Yeah, should do it.

speaker-1: Yeah. I definitely, I recommend it. I mean, it's budget friendly. ⁓ Once you get on the boat, you don't have really any concerns after that. Like you really get to kind of just relax and everything is going to be taken care of for the most part. obviously got to kind of keep track of your schedule so you know, you make it to different stuff. But, but, but other than that, like there's a bunch of stuff to do. ⁓ You know, if you, whatever you like, there's some of that there. ⁓ yeah. Group chat. Yeah, we're supposed to be on the group chat. Matter of fact, let me just open it up. There's a couple things out in the group chat. Some funny stuff, some maybe not so funny stuff. So let's just kind of see where we go with it. ⁓ I do want to bring up... So I sent you two different videos that kind of like this men versus women thing, right? And there was one with like ⁓ the German teacher. She took the kids in her class and she had them march to a song. Do you remember that video?

speaker-0: Yeah, with the girls and they had it on tape.

speaker-1: All the girls, all the boys in the front, all the girls like behind them and they were marching to the song and you watch the boys and the boys are like, they're all listening to a different song apparently because they're all marching to a different beat or to the beat of their own drum, right? Like they are a mess. It looks like chaos. And then the camera pans over to the girls and the girls are locking step, right? Like they're in sync. Every girl is doing the same step, the same time. The arm swing is the same. One of the girls looks like she's singing the song. Like the girls are so locked in. And the boys are way out of control. Right. And they had to be like nine or 10. They're like young kids. Yeah. And the idea behind it was like, you know, girls are maybe more mature, maybe more organized, maybe more detailed than boys are. And I I agree with that, especially when they're young. Right? Because I was a little boy and I had sisters. My sisters were definitely different than me. I'm rough and tumble. I want to go outside and play. I want to do stuff physically. ⁓ My sister that's closest to me, she was on that. Right? She was ready for that. She wanted to do all the stuff. She wanted to play basketball. She wanted to go, you know, ride skateboards. She wanted to do whatever. My older sisters are like, yeah, we're not going to do none of that. We're not doing none of that. you know, they like to fight or whatever, but they, you know, they don't want to do none of that outside stuff. We're not playing basketball. We're not playing catch. None of that. So you're going to have to go do that on your own. But they definitely were like more organized, they're especially as they got older. Right. Rooms are really like everything is exactly the way it's supposed to be. Room looks clean. My room was like, you know, I just came in there, threw all my clothes off and went back outside. Like, you know, I mean, get these school clothes out of here, throw these shoes over here. And it's definitely very different. And I wonder, is that just, I think that's just genetics, right? Like there's just the way we're made, right? We're just created that way where boys are just a little bit more rambunctious, I guess is the word, than girls, right? You always hear it and not maybe, I don't know, I haven't heard it recently, but I know when we were younger, it was always like the girls are more mature than boys. They're like two years older than boys in maturity. And I guess I can see it in that video.

speaker-0: In that video, yeah. I kind of got different ideas about it where I do think it could be that. I think it could also be the way that we view little girls from the jump where it's like, okay, now come in here. Now I'm going to teach you how to fold your clothes. Like little girls are, I don't want say they're pushed to like play house and yeah. But it seems like we do that, you know, another societal thing, you know, that we do, right? So, you me having a girl, know, bribe both, we both have girls. Something that I always wanted to make sure that I did with Maddie was that if she wanted to climb the tree, I would tell her, climb it. And then I'd be like, how high can you go? Because that's what my pops would have said to me. Go higher, go higher, boy, go higher. know, Tiff is like, don't go too high. I'm like, nah, if she falls. She falls, I'll catch her, she'll be fine. So I'm wondering, does that play a part in it or is it because girls are so young and they're able to socialize and connect with each other on a different level that when it's time for them to lock in, they lock in? Because I was telling you the story about when Maddie had her 11th birthday party, we took all the kids to escape room. And so there's probably like mostly girls and then like three boys and the girls were locked in, locked in figuring out what needs to go where, how does this work? What's the next step? The boys were just like chickens with their head cut off. And I was like, what is going on? And so they were just, ⁓ this push this button and it makes a bird noise. And they just, ⁓ I'm like, hey, hey, hey, guys, you got to figure out how to do this. You know, what are you doing? Okay. But, you know, they finally got it together at one point, but yeah, I'm wondering how much is genetic and how much is, you know, nurture, nature versus nurture. I don't know.

speaker-1: Yeah, you know what I'm thinking about too, because there's a second part to that is I think it might be in terms of like development, right? Like cycles, right? When they're younger and like the, because like I said, the kids in the video are like nine to 11 or something, Girls locked in, boys are a little chaotic. We get to like middle school, high school, like boys will have a friend from middle school their whole life, right? Just locked in. you can finish sentences kind of situation, right? Girls hate each other from like middle school to the end of high school, right? So my thing, and what I'm saying is like, so I think in that early stage, boys are just doing whatever they want to do, right? Like just whatever comes to mind, ⁓ this is cool, I'm doing that, right? I'm stepping this way because I think it looks cool. I'm gonna step this way, you step that way, whatever you do with your step, I do mine. Where girls are like, well. this step looks like the right step and that's the step she's doing. So I should be doing that step because I don't want to stand out. I don't want to look different. Then they get to high school, middle school and start kind of coming into their own. That's why they don't like anybody because she's stepping on my own, my circle, right? Like her being hers is an interference to me versus like me trying to be like her.

speaker-0: trying to

speaker-1: Where like if you go to middle school right now, every little boy looks the same. They got on the same hoodie. ⁓ You know what mean? Like they all look the same, no matter what color. Everybody got an Edgar haircut. Like everybody looks the same. Or they got the sponge deal. Like everybody looks the same. ⁓ And then, you know, when they become adults now, those, that timeframe in the beginning kind of changes. Cause there's a second video. And the second video is that they put these people on the deserted island, right? On one side of island, it's all women. other side of island saw men. So the boat pulls up in the ocean and it's like, all right, we're at the island, drop, you gotta get off, you gotta get to the island. They don't pull up to the beach, they pull up in the middle of the water and the women are freaking out already. clothes are gonna be wet, we're gonna be cold, it's lady crying before they even get off the boat. Tell the men the same thing, men are diving off fully clothed, like cannon balls, like they're doing the whole thing.

speaker-0: done

speaker-1: They finally get to the island, women are freaking out about how cold it is and how wet they are. Men are at the beach, like hanging out, dunking each other, playing chicken or whatever, right? And just like, again, socialize. Like they weren't, they aren't or weren't being socialized to handle survival in that way, right? Whereas as boys and men, it's like, there's a lot of... Not all of us are learning how to fish, not all of us are how to hunt, not all of us learning how to kill stuff and make fires and all that, but there is somewhere along the line, there is like a general understanding of it, of like what needs to happen in order for us to survive. Like, well, we got to get the shelter. I mean, we got to chop down trees and we got to build it this way. Because at some point we did it. Like we didn't maybe dive all the way into becoming a contractor or Bob the builder, but like we built a fort. We built it like we figured out how to make it sturdy. we caught a lizard out in the front yard and we didn't eat him this time, but on this deserted island, when we catch the lizard, we gonna chop him up. But for the women, it was like, oh my God, a snake. And they freaked out and ran away. Or it was like a caiman, which is like a small alligator. They freaked out and and they just left it. But the men caught one and killed it and ate for like, you know what I mean? Women were starving, were dehydrated because they wouldn't drink the water. Men are.

speaker-0: Good

speaker-1: thriving, they're like cheering around the campfire. It looked like they were having a bet. It looked like one of those, you you see like men's retreats. looked like a men's retreat. Like they were having the time of their lives. Guys are high fiving and handshaking and the whole thing. Making music.

speaker-0: Just jumping, diving and eating good thru it.

speaker-1: And the camera flips back to the other side and it looks like we need to donate 19 cents a day to these women because they are struggling. They're dehydrated. They haven't eaten in days. They haven't drunk water.

speaker-0: Oh my god, what did all girls say? So thirsty, so weak.

speaker-1: They're calling for a medic, people are dropping like flies and it's the same island. So they have all of the same resources. But my question, guess, in all of that is like, and I guess we kind of answered it right, because it's probably more socialization in society. think ultimately like society socializes men to be more, not masculine, more survivalist. than women and then as we get older, we learn how to use others or like to partnership to grow and they're like, we're going to survive. Like, you know how to hunt, I know how to build. All right, so you're to go kill everything. I'm going to build the house that we live in. Whereas women didn't get either one of those things, right? They probably could have, and this is going to sound sexist, but like they probably could have done some, quote unquote female thing. I'm not going to name any in particular, but something they could have done, right? Like. but they don't get the survival skills that I think are maybe necessary. was ultimately it was funny to see it, but it's also kind of like sad because maybe not sad. Maybe not sad.

speaker-0: I think it's just they get a different set of survival skills. the survival skills that they learn did not translate to Island. Like their skills, how to survive. Now I got that song in my head. Don't let it from my hand, But how to survive in corporate America, how to survive in

speaker-1: Survivor. Right. South Central. how to survive as a woman at night, how to survive in a parking lot.

speaker-0: page Yeah, you know what saying, but...

speaker-1: Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But again, that's society, right? Because on the deserted island, there isn't those constructs. isn't like corporate America. It's just straight up survival. You're going to live or you're going to die. You have to figure out how to do that. And in the event of apocalypse, which is coming eventually, right? A zombie apocalypse. Is it funny on these shows, like there's always like these.

speaker-0: Peace.

speaker-1: these groups of women who live and survive and they have like their little area that they live in. There's no men allowed and all that. I don't think as a man, I would want to be in one of those like scenarios, right? Like if all the women died today and there was no more women left, I'm gone, bro. Get me up out of here. Like, for what?

speaker-0: That's it. Man, you not trying to jump into the river and you know what I'm saying? He gang-

speaker-1: Hell nah, bro. we only got a couple. I'm gonna hang out for a couple weeks and give it a chance to see if these women coming back. like, for what? What we gonna do?

speaker-0: Just gonna live, man, just gonna live.

speaker-1: We're just gonna live until we die. Yeah, I guess, man. It depends on the apocalypse, right? Like if they just, it was like a snap and they all disappeared, but all the world was still the same. Okay, cool. But if it was like a disaster, Yeah, I'm out, bro. Yeah, I'd rather live by myself than to live with a bunch of dudes. Like, yeah, I'm out. Y'all enjoy it though. Peace be to Jerry.

speaker-0: We die. You just gonna leave me out there, huh? You feel right?

speaker-1: See, got more. You got your brother. You all be good.

speaker-0: They don't know how to fish. I'm the only one that how to fish.

speaker-1: But Mark will ride a bike somewhere? Like y'all be alright. Mark know how to shoot. Just going up to the top of a mountain or something like Moses and just never gonna... Suss it.

speaker-0: Come on hang with the golden guys, man

speaker-1: Nah, man, I couldn't do it. And it sounds funny to say, but like... For what?

speaker-0: Because there's still life, I almost said something real crazy, you know what saying? I stopped myself.

speaker-1: Yeah, but Because you think about all the stuff that would go away if women were to be gone, right? Obviously, it doesn't matter what gender is gone, people can do those jobs, But some of this, there's just no softness in the world. Everything is all hard and gray. It's a bunch of leather and like...

speaker-0: Yeah. Carbon fiber

speaker-1: Everything got hard edges and smell like cedar and like must because you because if there's no women around and obviously there's orientation or whatever right like we're not getting into that conversation but let's just say there's no women around right

speaker-0: Man, that car.

speaker-1: dudes would just stink. Dudes would be gross. The world would be gross. It would be what I imagine the zombie apocalypse would smell like. Wherever it smells like on Walking Dead, that's what the world would smell like and we wouldn't be dead.

speaker-0: Yeah, for sure. Sure. That's what I was thinking about the island. Like, okay, so once the guys have gotten to a point to where they know they can get food, they know they've got water, they know that they're safe, when does Lord of the Flies happen? Because it happens at one point where we're gonna get, I'm gonna get tired of being around you after a while. You know what? I should be the one to run this, not you. I'm the one that knows how to fish. I'm the one that, nah, I'm the one that built this. I should lead. And it would be, I feel like we would make it work, but maybe not. Cause you know, the first thing that we learned as men is, you know, our emotions is either anger or, ⁓ you know, anger. ⁓

speaker-1: Yeah. Yeah, once, yeah, you're right. Because once it's like, it's not life or death anymore, and we all are secure and like our ability to survive, like we know we're going to be okay, then it starts being egos. Right? Because we're beyond the potential of death. Now it's like, oh man, I'm eating good. I'm feeling strong. And why are you eating the same amount that I'm eating? Like I went out and caught the fish, but he get to eat. No, no, I'm eating more fish. Yeah, that's,

speaker-0: Listen up, Piggy. You it could be amazing or it could just go to hell very quickly after we get to that safe point. Right. Because I feel like that's how it is in society, right? If aliens, well, all right, we can go back to 9-11. When 9-11 hit, for a brief moment, it was like, we're all Americans. We need to be there for each other. And then like about a week later, was like, Indian dudes getting snatched out of CAS because some racist dude decided that you were Arab and Arabs were the bad people. Then it was, need to ban the Muslims. And no, that was when Trump came in, you know what saying? It was like all this like against Muslim, know, there's homophobia and all this kind of, so for a brief moment, when the world ends or if the world ends, apocalypse happens, we're going to be good for a solid. a solid couple of weeks. then after that, it's going to real solid.

speaker-1: would say six months, but yeah, couple weeks might be more realistic,

speaker-0: Maybe six months, but you know, people, when their back is against the wall, you know what saying, things get real shaky for people. You start to see like, okay, I thought you love God. Why are you beating up that homeless man to get the last piece of the chicken?

speaker-1: and God said I'm supposed to eat. God told me that he ain't. I'm going to eat, he can't eat. Yeah, that's a sad and probably unfortunate truth. probably unfortunate. It is unfortunate. Probably true.

speaker-0: Right? Hopefully not.

speaker-1: My faith in humanity is slowly slipping. I'm a day closer to being an expat. every day. Every day something happens and I'm like, man, I don't know if it's even gonna be better over there, but I'm gonna find out. Yeah, listen.

speaker-0: feel like it might be. I got a buddy, he just got back from South Korea. He was telling me about it. He was like, yeah, man, the kids, eight-year-old boy on a bus by himself, because there's no issues like we have over here when it comes to the children. It's just in the society that the children are protected. Now, of course you're going to have people that are going to be predators no matter what, but it's like,

speaker-1: Mm-hmm.

speaker-0: Yeah, man, we were on a bus. You just see a bus full of like these young kids and then they get off the bus and they walk to where they need to walk to. There's no parents on a bus with them. It was crazy, man. He's like, you know, I have my daughter, she's going to the bathroom and I'm like, ⁓ yeah, go ahead. So I knew she was all right. And then she was like, and he was like, when we landed back in America, we're at the airport and she was like, daddy, I'm going to the bathroom. Hey, hey, wait a little. I got to go with you, make sure everything is cool. Because it's you know, it's a different mentality. Now we're back home.

speaker-1: Wait.

speaker-0: And I'm like, dang, I felt the same way about, you know, we're in Thailand. I'm like, I'm eating like a pig. And I'm like, how did I lose 10 pounds? I ate like, like crazy.

speaker-1: No Yeah, that was a trip.

speaker-0: But I mean, I'm sure every place has, you know, their thing that you're just like, yeah, but I don't know, bruh.

speaker-1: There's no utopia, right? There's something everywhere, right? And it's just a matter of like, what are you trading for? Are you trading for the lesser evil? But there's something going to be there, right? And you just hope that it's not something that you can't handle. ⁓ Going back to survival and talking about like kind of life or death scenarios, there was another one in the group chat, another video that was a big boy from a big boy's neighborhood.

speaker-0: STAB HER! BOOOO-

speaker-1: ⁓ And Aries Spears. so the question was, would you rather know how you're going to die or would you rather know when you're going to die? Like if someone slipped two envelopes on a table in front of you and it was like a how and a when, which one would you take? One. got to pick one. Dang. Because obviously there's neither, right? You just want to live your life. ⁓

speaker-0: And I had to take Yeah, like whatever happens. Let me just rock. How and ⁓ That's a deep question, sir. I mean, the win would be terrible for me because I'm just waiting for that moment to happen. But then also it could be great if the win is, you know, in 60 years, you're going to do this or do that. But I think the problem with the how is you're going to choke on a grape one day. Now I'm living my whole life like I ain't eating no damn grapes. You know what saying? Right. ⁓ you're going to get hit by a car. I mean, I can't, I can't get in the car. don't want, I don't want to get in car. Right. Man, but if I had to choose, speed this up for y'all. Give me the how, because I feel like at least with the how, I can do something to work at it. If it's like, you're gonna have a brain aneurysm. mean, there's not much you could do about that, or you're gonna get cancer. Not much you can do about that. So, eff it, man. I'm just gonna live my life and just let it rock. If I know when. I don't know man, what about you?

speaker-1: Yeah, so I had some time to think this one through. ⁓ it's tough, right? Because when you think about it, when, and I'm leaning towards when, right? And the reason I say that is because if I know when I'm going to die, I can change the way I move. Like, regardless of what I do today, if I'm not going to die until, you know, ⁓ February 2040, then it don't matter. could take all kinds of risks. I can go out and play in traffic and not get hit by it. You know what saying? There's all these different things you can do because you know exactly when you're going to die. And it ain't today, so I can take these chances. I can live a life fully. Like say it's next week. All right. I know I'm going to die next week. I better start. I'm going to do everything that I can. I'm going party. I'm going do everything I can because I know that I'm going to end it pretty I don't know about all that.

speaker-0: Nothing

speaker-1: But you could, there's no OD in, right? Like you could just be as high as, high as meat coats. You know what I mean? It's high. Right? But the how, I think the how part is difficult because like if you, like for example, you said grapes, right? I don't know if it really changes anything. Like, okay, I'm not going to eat grapes, but I know a grape is going to kill me. So at some point it's going to happen. So I might as well just eat them.

speaker-0: as Wu Tang Ge. being shot to the head.

speaker-1: With a grape, know what I'm Like a grape is gonna be the way I'm gonna die. It might be today. I'm gonna eat these grapes. You know what I mean? And you never know when it's gonna happen. You just know it's gonna happen. Even if it was something medical, right? Like it's a, I don't know, heart attack or something, right? So you just try to do cardio and try to take care of yourself and make sure your heart is healthy. But at some point, a heart attack is gonna get you. So doing all that stuff isn't gonna stop it. It's still going to happen. So I don't know if that changes or gives me anything, right? I just know I'm gonna die from heart attack. Okay, all right. So I guess I'll get my heart healthy, can still healthy people have died from heart attacks. Yeah, right. So like it doesn't that part really doesn't matter. But at least if I know when I'm gonna die, I can do things differently. I can plan accordingly. I can set some stuff up for the kids. We can if it's like a short time, like I'm on I'm on a limited schedule here. Like, all right, we got to do X, Y, What's on our bucket list? Like I can start putting those things together. Like if I got 40 years and I can make a longer bucket list of things that we do. Like, so I would definitely, now that I've talked through it a little bit more, I would definitely take the win ⁓ because it's not gonna, I don't think it's gonna make me like a terrible person, right? Like I'm not gonna become like a villain because I know when I'm gonna die. But I think I would live life more abundantly if I knew when it was gonna happen. ⁓ There's a, I think there's a lot, and this may be just me personally, is like, I'm young, I'm healthy. I feel like I got a lot of time ahead of me. So I don't have to rush to do things as much, right? At the same time, I'm always thinking like I could be dead tomorrow. This is really cryptic. Because this is something that me and Ari talk about this all the time. it's whenever we do something for the family that has any relation to the family, I always use our family email and like whatever, I use family stuff, right? And she was like, why do you always, because she uses, sometimes she'll use her own personal email or whatever. And I was like, listen, man, whatever it is, if you set it up, use the family email. And I was like, the reason I do it that way is because if I get hit by a car tomorrow, you need to be able to sign into this stuff. You need to be able to get access to this stuff. So I use a family email because you also have access to family email. If I use my personal email, you can't get into it. Like you're not going to be able to, it's not going to send you a code to get into the email. Like you're going to have to go through a whole bunch of hoops. So like I'm always thinking about like today I could walk out of the house and not come back in the house today. like. That's already there. But at least if I know like, can walk out the house today and I come back and I'm gonna keep being able to come back until July 27th, 2047, then cool, I'm great. I'm rocking. Like I go out the house and with a full cup, come back in the house with a full cup. Cause I know I'm gonna wake up tomorrow. And as we get closer, maybe I'll do some things differently. Maybe I don't go out the house as much. Maybe I do more stuff with the family, like whatever. But I think time or when, yes, ultimately. Ultimately, I would choose when, just for the reasons that I said, just because I think for me, I think that makes me feel better.

speaker-0: Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, no, feel you. I think I have, got a statement and I got a question then. So the statement is the thing. This nigga, we're gonna keep going. So the when, the problem that I have, well not the problem, the thing that's a curve ball for me with the when is, okay, if I know when, and like you were saying, like, okay, it's in 60 years from now, or 20 years, or 10 days, or whatever, I know I can go and just be more reckless and just do whatever, but. It don't say that I can't sit in the hospital for four years after getting hit by the car in the street. You know what saying? So I'm like, okay, do I get to be a little more reckless, quote unquote, or do I still have to live my life in the way that I would regularly live my life? Which takes me to this question. If you know that you can die at any moment and knowing that now, right, versus knowing when you're gonna die. And you're like, oh, well, if I know I'm gonna die, this, at these many years or these days or these months, I'm gonna live my life more free or more whatever. What's stopping you from living your life that way right now?

speaker-1: Now, right. So I was at the end of it.

speaker-0: That was so good. Yeah, that's me. Yeah, yeah. I'm about. Yeah, yeah.

speaker-1: All right, so I'll start by saying I only use playing in traffic as an example. So I think personality wise, right? I just generally am not doing anything that could potentially kill me. I just don't enjoy doing death defying things. And as I've gotten older and I got responsibility and I got family and stuff like that, so I'm less likely to go skydiving. I'm not bungee jumping. I'm not doing some of those things that... You know, if I know I'm not going to die from it for another 20 years, I'm still just not interested. You know what mean? Like, it's just not at the top of my list of things to do. So I would say for somebody that's like into that kind of stuff, it might not be a good idea for you to know when because you might go, you know, ⁓ cliff jumping or something crazy and then end up quadriplegic. Like you're alive, but that ain't the type of life that you want to live based on the personality that you have.

speaker-0: Kill me, I got 40 more years.

speaker-1: Right? Yeah. Be a vegetable. You're technically still alive, but you're alive for another 40 years, right? That would suck. ⁓ So I still, I think I would lose, obviously I would lose a like, I could die any day ⁓ mindset. because I know I'm not gonna die any day, right? Like I know what day I'm gonna die, but I think I still would have the same personality. I would still do the same stuff. then knowing when that day is gonna come, don't really, like right now I expect it to be years from now, right? That I die. And so I think I'm still living in a way that is setting up for that ending at some point. ⁓ And I'm not doing stuff that's gonna kill me. I'm not snorting lines because I know I'm not going OD. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. So I think it depends on the person. Again, like I said earlier, it depends on the person, depends on the situation. For me, I don't think that would be necessarily a curveball for me because I don't. I'm just that's just not me. You know.

speaker-0: Yeah, nah, you. I feel you, yeah. I'm with you on that one. Yeah, I think I would still do the how just because I'd be like, I fit, Just, it's the closest thing to what I have right now. So, you know, my doctor already told me, Mr. you know, if you eat this way and you live your life this way, then high blood pressure, stroke, heart disease, right? If I eat too much pizza, then I know I could die at one point. Just because I want a pizza, that's crazy to think about it in that way. So it's like, man, you Yeah, I think I'm still gonna stick with the how. I'd rather not know at all. I'd rather just have what I have right now today and just like, man, let's go.

speaker-1: Yeah, I think that plays a big part in it too, right? Because you're in a scenario where obviously all of us have ambitions and want more, right? But we're in a position where life is pretty good, right? It's comfortable, we're okay. So kind of wanting to stay as close to normal is like the idea, right? But like if you were in a terrible situation, you might lean more towards one way or the other. You know what mean? Or you may be more want... I don't know, maybe to know when so you can go do some crazy stuff. You know what I'm saying? And also I think too, being in the 40s, having experienced 40 years of life and looking forward to the 40s, like we're in the middle point where it's like, I think the asking the 20-year-old this question gives you a very, very different response or a 60-year-old gives you a very different response, right? Because they've already got some health concerns and like, all right, is the heart thing gonna be the thing to get me? Oh, it's not, it's a great, oh, shit.

speaker-0: you

speaker-1: You know what mean? I've been taking this medicine for 20 years and I am, you know. eat this fried chicken. Right. So I think it always depends on who you are in the context of your situation. yeah, I understand why you would want to try to kind of stay close to where you are, because I feel the same way. Like I would pretty much be doing the same stuff I'm doing now, just with the understanding that I'm going to on this day, you know, hey guys, that's it. It's time to sleep. Yeah. I'll see you guys on the other side.

speaker-0: I'm gonna sleep. with their ancestors. All right, man. That's a nice, dreary way to end the show. So let's not end the show. Let's do some congratulations, brother. You want to go first?

speaker-1: ⁓ yeah. Yeah, I'm still, man, I still feel how I feel about congratulations. I always get to this point, I'm like, should I tell you what I need correct, congratulations for? Or am just saying things that I've done and then you congratulate me? Or am I congratulating you? You know what mean?

speaker-0: That didn't sound too well. Yeah, that's all right. We don't do this. It's not natural. We need to make it natural. You know what I'm saying?

speaker-1: All right, so I'm going to start by congratulating you just on something off the top of my head. ⁓ on ⁓ being in a position in your life where you feel like if you had the option to know when or how you die, regardless of which one you chose, your ultimate goal is to stay as close to where you are right now, which means that you've created a life and a family for yourself that is near

speaker-0: Okay.

speaker-1: your desired outcome, right? Like there's some people that are searching for ways to completely change their whole situation, right? Like their lives are in dire straits or they're with a person they don't like and a situation they don't like in a house or whatever. And you've crafted and created a life for yourself, you know, that you want to be in. Like, hey, I don't really even care when or how, like I just want to stay here and just enjoy where I got. And that's really, really cool. So congratulations on that and congratulations on the recovery and the bounce back from being injured. You're not 100 % yet, but working your way through it and we'll soon be healthy. So congratulations on health.

speaker-0: Thank you brother, appreciate that. that. Hey man, I was congratulating myself so I did not come prepared to congratulate you, you know what saying? And you still trying to get out of congratulating yourself.

speaker-1: I'm in ⁓ I got that. So let me just say it real quick. I talked on the last episode a couple of weeks ago about Baseline Performance. Officially, ⁓ technically it's live now, but I'm not really talking about it. It'll officially go live where you can go to the site and make purchases on Saturday. If you're one of the first 50 people, Baseline 20 will save you 20%. So if you listen to the podcast, ⁓ I don't know when you're listening to it, that probably will be gone by the time you hear it. But ⁓ If it's not, you go there, hit bassline 20, might save yourself 20%. If you subscribe or, you know, drop your email in there, it'll at least save you 15%. So you may be able to save some money out the way. so yeah, so check that out. I'm excited about it. It's now moving faster than it was moving at one point. had a little slow down, but now we firing in all cylinders. So should be live and ready to go this weekend. I'm excited.

speaker-0: dropping this tomorrow so Nice, man. Congratulations, brother. See, this is what I'm saying.

speaker-1: I'm trying to get like you man. ⁓

speaker-0: Hey man, congratulate yourself, man. That's one thing we need to do more, man. Yeah. Congratulate ourselves. ⁓ Man, we didn't get to that one topic, but we'll get to it maybe next week. My thing was ⁓ kind of like what you were saying about ⁓ my return to health, I should say, but it wasn't so much about the return, it was about my... changing my mind state when I was down. ⁓ Me and Tiff, we used to be in this couples class with like a lot of older people. And I remember there was one brother, he was like a man's man. He said, you know, he had gotten cancer and there was things that he just, could not do anymore. And he had to depend on his wife. And he was so angry about it until the point to where God opened his eyes to see like, here's this person that I got for you to help you. Right, your partner, you know what saying? Partner in crime, partner in whatever you want to call it, that is helping you see her. And he was like, man, it just opened my eyes to how amazing she is. And while I do not have cancer, God willing, I never will, know, being anybody that's listening that's ever had, you know, throwing your back out or whatnot, had a pinched nerve, whatever it may be, you know, like certain things you just can't even do. by yourself, it's time for you to use the bathroom, it's gonna be a whole lot of deep breathing and okay, let's make this happen. You know? So me, I'm the same way, I'm not like a, a, Cro-Magnon, beast mode, I'm the man, but I am a man's man, you know what saying? Like, watch out, let me get that for you. Why are you carrying those bags? You got a man right, give me your bags, what are you doing? That kind of brother. Having to, not just lean on my wife, but also lean on my daughter to help me do things like pass me my socks so I can put my shoes on, passing my shoes after you give me my socks so I can put my shoes on, or can you tie my shoes for me? These things that literally humbled me, but I got to a place to where I was comfortable being able to ask them to do the things. the reason I was comfortable to ask them to do the things because they wanted to do these things for me. ⁓ And it just made me feel like whole, you know what saying? Like, okay, if I have to sit down, I'm protected. We're gonna be all right. I'm gonna be taken care of and then I'm gonna get back better and then I'm gonna handle business like I was doing before. But it was good for me to be humbled in that way and to also just. to see, because I already knew it, but it's different when you're going through it and you have to rely on someone to do something. You physically just cannot do something or maybe you can't afford to do something. You ain't got the money. know, as men, we're always like, we provide, we protect, we take charge. And it's like, okay, well, if you don't got the money to do it and your wife has a better job or is making more money at this point in life. And she's like, yo, the bank account is ours. it's paid for. It's like, okay, cool. That feels beautiful to me. You know what saying? So yeah, just changing that mind state and just feeling safe and it felt good, man. So yeah, just that. That in itself.

speaker-1: Yeah, that's dope. That's dope. And again, I think that leans into, I don't know if you got anything else say, but I that leans into what I was saying about you earlier about you having a life, like building that life in those people, right? Because they want to take care of you because of who you are, right? And the relationships that you've built and like being able to be vulnerable in that moment or having the space and wherewithal to be like. you I can't do this on my own and I need help. And then you've created a little person and your daughter that is like, okay, daddy, like I get it. I'm gonna help you out. And you got a wife who's a help me. It is like, yeah, whatever you need. Like I got you. Like I got your back, right? You've created and built that with them, right? In concert with them, but also because of who you are. And that's dope, man. Congratulations again to you. You were just out here getting all the congratulations.

speaker-0: Hmm Thank you, brother. I'm feeling good out here. Almost got me tearing up, so I'm glad the camera cut off, man. Nobody see. Yeah, man. ⁓ But now I got to go slave, man. I got to go.

speaker-1: It's Big Mike Day. And you don't have to you know, just take a matchbook with you and some clients and paper products Right, that's crazy. We can't talk about that on the podcast right now because we got to wrap up but that's crazy

speaker-0: You pay us more, baby. That's crazy. But is it?

speaker-1: Right? Because there is a whole lot of insurance money that went with that.

speaker-0: And, you know, like you said, we can't get too deep into it. I really want to, but... having a discussion with my buddy at work. And one thing that he says is, you know, we agree upon this. You know, we're like, listen, if Trump makes the country so bad that that regular, daggler white person that was regular middle-class and, you know, just had a very comfortable life begins to feel the pressure of what... black folks and immigrants and even poor white people go through, that's when things change because they're going to burn the warehouse down because they're not used to coming home and making a mayonnaise sandwich or you know what saying, a barbecue sauce sandwich. They're not used to having to stretch them noodles out or eating sardines or smoked oysters, like whatever it may be. They not used to it, so it's gonna feel foreign.

speaker-1: Mm-hmm.

speaker-0: And I forgot where, ⁓ yeah, so, yeah, so, you know, that the warehouse is gonna get burned down. And then I feel like. Hopefully we never come to that point to where we gotta start burning a warehouse down. But I've always told people, I'm like, you look at minorities, we are the barometer for how America is doing. And if you wanna know how America can rise up, well help those folks that are in a position where they need help to rise up. as the famous quote goes, a rising tide lifts all ships. But, you know, I'm gonna get too deep into that at the very end, you know what saying?

speaker-1: Right? Yeah. Then the other side of that is instead of raising the tide, people just build bigger boats. Right? People who can afford it just build taller boats, so they're further away from the water. Like, don't need to raise the tide if my boat is... It's a whole conversation. For next time. For next time. Right? Oh, man. Don't do it. All right. Let's get out

speaker-0: You what's up? We can all make it through the flood. ⁓ right, what can they find instead of my brothers?

speaker-1: You probably are already seeing us on Instagram at Grown Man GamePod. If you're not, you definitely should go ahead and head over there and follow us. You get all the clips of the episode. On YouTube, it's the same, right? YouTube has been kind of popping lately. So you definitely got to stay on top of that. I appreciate all the comments, the likes, the shares. And then if you wanted us to talk about something or you want to reach out to us directly at Grown Man Game Podcast on Gmail. It's the best way to get in touch with, or one of the ways, right? You can DM us or message us on any of the other platforms, but the email will probably get our attention a little faster. So shout out to y'all, man. Really appreciate it. Appreciate you guys joining us for another episode. ⁓ Hope we shared something that resonated with you. ⁓ If we did, or you feel like it did, make sure you share it with another brother. ⁓ know, Grown Man Game is a podcast that's for us, by us. But it only gets good if we share it with us. So make sure you share it with another brother and we'll see y'all next time.