Oct. 22, 2023
AFTERWORDS: Alien³ (1992)
R 1992 ‧David Fincher
I still hate Alien³ all these years later. It’s drab, dingy, and largely uninteresting. It’s narrative is still upsetting after all these years. It’s a slap in the face to James Cameron and the characters we loved.
The film itself is a Frankenstein monster. Half 20th Century Fox’s demands and half David Fincher’s actual vision.
It’s a product of a bygone era. A morbid curiosity. The only merit I will give it is that it commits SO HARD to it’s grim tone (and general aesthetics). It loves wallowing in it’s irredeemable protagonists and ultimately that leaves me empty.
I love Fincher but this is the bottom of his barrel. The basement if you will. Luckily, it was his first film and everything else he has done has been great. I’ll chalk it up as a mulligan.
3/10 
AFTERWORD: RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD (1985)
Hands down, this film is my favorite zombie movie. I know I’m going to take a lot of heat from Romero purists for that, but I just like what I like. So sue me.
I don’t think anything can ever top Linnea Quigley dancing naked in a cemete…
AFTERWORDS: SLUMBER PARTY MASSACRE II (1987)
Horror comedy really is a difficult genre. You either really nail it, like Peter Jackson’s Dead Alive or Edgar Wright’s Shaun of the Dead, or you fall flat on your face. Personally, I love Dead Heat with Treat Williams (R.I.P.) and Joe P…
