SCREAMQUEENZ RESURRECTION - "The House care of Itself.." - BURNT OFFERINGS (1976)

Hey there, screamerz.

The following vintage episode of ScreamQueenz first aired as part of episode 73, which debuted on Thanksgiving Day 2012. So it seemed like the perfect time since.And since the holiday season is kicking off this weekend, it seemed the perfect time to re release it to you. It's where I'm talking about the film Burnt Offerings with my good friend and old boss David Robbiano from the Jekyll and High Club.And I think you'll have a fantastic time. Quick bit of news before we start. As ScreamQueenz was wrapping up production, I was holding out.I kept delaying ending the show because I really wanted to squeeze one more episode.I was hoping and praying that Saint Drogo, the new film from Monster Makeup llc, the guys behind Death Drop Gorgeous, that their movie would finally become publicly available. Because I saw it on the festival circuit years ago and had my mind blown.It's grim, it's horrifying, it's one of the most genuinely frightening films I've seen in the last 10 years. But it wasn't coming out and eventually I just couldn't hold out anymore. Said I gotta wrap up this show.I'm sorry, guys, but if you ever release publicly, I will bring ScreamQueenz back. So I'm bringing ScreamQueenz back for one episode because Saint Jogo is finally available. It is available on Blu Ray directly from them right now.I'll put the link down then there's down there in the show notes. And I'll be sitting down with super hockey movie star Dan Dominguez to talk.

About it really soon.

And I'm super excited to talk about it, but right now we've got another show to do. Enjoy your holiday season. Stay safe, stay sexy, and most of all, stay fabulous.

Enjoy the show.

This program is a proud member of Univa's unified, unique voices. Learn more at univozpods.net.

Hello, my name's Patrick and I'm a scream queen.

I'm a scream queen and so are you.

Okay, so the main selection for this week is the 1976 haunted house classic, Burnt Offering, starring Bette Davis, Oliver Reed and Karen Black. Karen Black, like me. That was a stupid joke anyway. I can't possibly go to a haunted house all by myself. It's too scary. It's just too scary.So I enlisted the help of one of the best paranormal investigators that I know, even though he's probably not a paranormal investigator. But I don't know what I'm saying. I don't know what I'm saying. But you know who he is. He Is the inimitable. Can I use your last name? David?

Of course.

Okay. The one, the only, the inimitable David Robbiano.

Hey, Patrick. How are you.

I'm good, David. How are you?

I'm good. I'm thrilled to be on your show. You know, we listen to this all the time. We lie in bed listening to Patrick scream queens.

Are you using the royal we right now?

I am using the royal we. Oh, okay. Meaning me and Kate Middleton lie in bed listening to you review our favorite movies.

Okay. Wow, that really means a lot. It really means a lot. So, David Robbiano. Who the hell are you? Why are you on my show?

Well, that's a good question. So I'm the director of entertainment for a club here in New York called the Jekyll and Hyde Club, and I'm sure some of your listeners know of us.Some of your listeners may not know of us. We are a haunted interactive theme restaurant, and we're one of the most famous in the world.And we are in the process of opening a new Times Square flagship location, which I am very excited to say that Scream Queen's Patrick is gonna be a part of.

Oh, my God. I just found out right now the second. Oh, my God, I'm so excited.

What have you won? What are you gonna do?

I don't know. I think I just crapped my pants. No, I actually used to work at the Jekyll and High Club at its old location.I'm telling the listeners this, not you, because you know that. So I know David from there. I've known him forever, and I'm so glad that he' back in my life and he's gonna be my new boss.

Yay. And make sure that you know anybody who's listening to this. Come visit us.

Bing bong Patrick from the future here. Please don't do that. Please don't come visit us at the Jekyll and Hyde Club.Not that we don't love you, it's just that it's been out of business for a really long time. Yeah, the Jekyll and Hyde Club is out of business.All its spin off bars and restaurants and pubs and theme parks, they're all out of business because the guy who owned it all is rotting in jail.

Where he belongs for fraud.

Not David. Not David Robbiano. David Robbiano was my manager. He did not own the club. David. Not in prison. Probably because he'd enjoy it too much.But not the point right now. Bing bong back to the show. Don't come visit us.

It is a pretty exciting place. It's like walking into a haunted museum where there are special effects and things come to life. And wacky professional actors walking around.

And there's booze.

And there is booze. And food.

Thank you. And food. And snacks. But it's not open yet. Am I correct? Am I correct? I know damn well it's not open yet. But it will be open soon.

Yeah, within the next week or so, God willing.

Oh, my Lord in heaven. So exciting. So let's talk about burnt offerings.

It all began as a summer vacation. A young family found a beautiful old house. It had secluded, spacious grounds, a large swimming pool, magnificent furnishings.So you are the people who want to rent this house?

Well.

You mean it's $900 and then it's all ours? Well, there is one other thing. It's hardly a catch. They thought it was the answer to their dreams, but it was the beginning of a nightmare. Oh, God.

Oh, God.

In this old house, up this staircase, behind this locked door, something lives. Something strange. Something powerful. Something evil.

Stay away from me, door.

It will possess this woman. It will destroy this man, terrify this child. And no one can stop it. Burnt Offering, starring Karen Black.

Are you actually trying to tell me that this house is responsible?

Oliver Reed?

This house is destroying us.

Betty Davis?

This house is getting so cold.

Burgess Meredith. And this house will be here long, long after you have departed. You believe.

God when it comes alive? Tell me about it.

Tell me what it's like.

Behind door lies a horror beyond imagination. Who is it? Where did it come from? What does it want? When you find out, it'll be too late. Burnt offerings.

How much fun is this movie?

I love this movie.

I do, too. See, I'm a big fan of Dan Curtis, who wrote and directed it. Right. And who also created Patrick.

What?

What did he create?

I don't know.

You're killing me. Dark Shadows.

Oh. See, I never got into Dark Shadows.

Oh, I'm a big fan of the original Dark Shadow.

Naturally. Even I know the remake is ass. It's horrible.

Much to my partner's dismay. At one point, I decided that I was Gonna watch all 1500 episodes of Dark Shadows. And it took me a little bit over a year, but I did.

That's ambitious in a bucket list. Bucket lists. It's better than Die Now.Actually, one of my listeners and fellow podcasters, Toppy Smelly who lives out in Pickle Holler, he got the entire 1500 set. 1500 episode collection on DVD from a listener.

That's crazy.

I must have weighed 700 pounds coming in Amazon.

You know what the best thing about it is? Is because at that time, they had, like, one take to do it. Oh, yeah.

Well, it was like soap opera. It was like live soap opera, but.

It was so they'd be forgetting lines, there'd be sets falling over, they couldn't remember who they were talking to. And it all went out. It was fabulous.

It ran on TV when I was a kid, but it was before I got home from school, so I didn't get into it then. And now it's just so big and looming, I don't know where to start.

Yeah, start with Barnabas. That's where everybody starts. Okay, so. But.

But David Robbiano just schooled me, right on my own show.

He did school you. Seriously, he did school me.

It feels good to be schooled sometimes. I'm not. I'm not an all knowing omnipotent.

You're pretty damn close to all knowing.

I know I'm a borderline savant, but.

I have to tell you, we went to go see Burnt Offerings on the big screen, which was kind of fun.

Now you got to see it with the Hedda Lettuce. Chelsea Clearview Classics, Am I correct?

Yeah, absolutely. Hedda Lettuce does every Thursday.

She. Who's she?

She. Hedda Lettuce is a fabulous drag queen performer in New York City.And also, like, she's been on Sex and the City and Project Runway, and every week she does have straight people.

That listen, so, you know, they would be confused.

Okay, so Project Runway is there on their own.

Now, just stay on topic.

Okay, Sorry. So anyways, she does this every Thursday and Burnt Offerings was one of her choices.And she talks about it before and does a free giveaway and stuff like that. And in this case makes fun of Karen Black's lazy eye.

Oh, it's not that lazy. It's not like one's, you know, one's looking at you, the other one's looking around the corner. It's not that bad.But I guess, yes, now that you mentioned, she does have a lazy eye. Thank you for ruining this movie for me.

She's a wee bit cross eyed. Come on.

I guess I couldn't put my finger on what was wrong. There's so much wrong with her eyes, in a good way and in a bad way. They're arresting eyes for terrifying eyes.But was this one of the ones that she talked all the way through? Because I've seen some movies there where she does commentary throughout. Valley of the Dolls is amazing.

My favorite.

Her Valley of the Dolls is amazing.

But yeah, she did. She talked through much of it and would like every time Karen went cross eyed, would point her laser pointer at the screen.

I saw the Bad Seed there, which is another one of my favorite movies. She. She introduced it and stuff, but she did not talk through it.

Yeah, some she does and some she doesn't.

Yeah. And it was kind of cool that you didn't. But it was fascinating to watch it with a primarily gay audience.

Right.

Because it was weird to see like people were laughing and everything. And I'm like, oh shit. Cuz there's like some parts in that that are pretty heavy. Cause the tie in here is Eileen Eckert.

Exactly.

Yes. And she played them in the bedsuit. She played the mom of the kid who was drowned.And she's got this amazing scene where she comes in drunk and she's just railing at the other mother. And it's hilarious. But then it turns out absolutely heartbreakingly tragic. But still kind of funny.

Right.

At the same time. But that gay audience went right with it. They laughed exactly where they were supposed to laugh.And when she left at the end of that scene, the audience stood up and applauded. Standing ovation for a movie that's 60 years old.

That's fabulous. We're a smart audience.

Yeah, yeah. And I noticed things that I never noticed before, like how many cocktails they go through in that movie.Like I don't know how anybody had a liver left.

Yeah. And she did point out things, you know, she pointed out things in the movie that in Burnt Offerings that I thought were great.But so you know, how many of your listeners do you think have seen this movie?

Probably a lot of the old. Our generation. I was gonna say older, but our generation. Some of the younger ones, maybe not.It used to the round on TV a lot, but I haven't seen it on such a.

Great cast. Right, so great cast.

Great. So David, you want to run down the basic plot of Burnt Offerings?

Sure. So spoiler free. So a family goes to rent this house for the summer. It's a dilapidated old house and, you know, everything's dead around it.It's just falling apart.

A huge house, by the way. Like a borderline mansion.

Yeah, huge and just totally falling apart. And there's a brother and sister who live there and. And they offer.

Ancient brother and sister.

Right. And they offer them this house at a ridiculous price and $900 for the summer. And the only thing they find out is that one.That they just have to kind of take care of the House. Even though, in Eileen Heckart's words, the house takes care of itself. Right.And then they find out that their old mother, the brother and sister's old mother, is living up in the attic, and she just has to bring the mother three meals a day and just leave it in the sitting room and pick up the dirty dishes.

Yeah, you'll probably never see her is what they're told. She doesn't come out.

And the husband is not really down with it. Right. But right away, Karen Black has this, like, bond with the house. Like, she has some kind of. She really loves the house.And then just things start going a little awry. Right. And they're also bringing with them their Aunt Elizabeth, who is Bette Davis, and their son, whose name is David.

Yes.

Are you sighing?

I'm sighing.

Why did you sigh?

I'm sighing because that kid is one of the most annoying child actors ever. I just can't stand. My first note is Davey equals annoying. Annoying.

Ellen Pate as former Davey. I regret that. Regret. Resent. Sorry, not you. This kid.

He was annoying in Ben. He was annoying on the Mod Squad. He looks like Ellen Page. It just annoys me, everything.

You gotta give him credit, though. He's a pretty good little actor.

But there's just something about him. I don't like it. There was something weird. Okay, we'll get into that later. There's just something weird in the father son relationship.Well, yeah, it was just weird.

So what I thought was really cool was how, like, dilapidated everything was. And then, you know, as the. The picture goes along. Did I just say picture? AM I, like, 72?

You are. Okay, so at the flicker show, as.

The picture goes along, you know, gradually, like, the house is getting better and nicer.

Yes.

Right. And, you know, weird things start happening.But, like, there's a greenhouse with all these dead plants that all of a sudden are, like, beautiful and gorgeous and.

Not all at once, just slowly, all of a sudden, they're getting better and better.

Yeah.

And Kara Black's taking credit for it all. She's like, oh, yes, I've been working in here, but really, the amount of work necessary to do all this for one person. Impossible.

Yeah. Like, unless she can do, like, house restoration, it seems a little overnight.

Yeah. So that's. That's the thing. The house does take care of itself.

And also, she never does see the. The old lady, but she keeps bringing up the food.And like, in the sitting room, there's all these pictures of people that are just all kinds of time periods and different Clothes. And, like, if it's, like, the old lady's family, it sure seems like a lot of different types of people in different time periods.

Yep. Okay, good. Anyways, creepy supernatural things are afoot. The summer does not go well for anybody. And that's the movie.Okay, so I'm just gonna go down through my notes.

A half hour in, the weirdest thing happens. Like the pool. Right. Is that like the most memorable scene or one of the most memorable scenes in the movie?

Yeah, yeah, there are a lot of memorable. No, I'm gonna say no. It's one of the.

But no.

Okay, we'll get to that.

Okay.

Okay. So, okay, they get to the house, and they're looking at the house, and. What's his name?Burgess Meredith and Eileen Eckert are the ancient brother and sister who have their even more ancient mother. They come in and they're like this weird Nancy couple, right? There was something really gay about both of them.Like these old spinsters that never married or had any children. And with the way they talk to each other, it's like old school gay. Yeah. Yeah. But Eileen Eckard drops a lot of bombs in there that, you know, if.You know the story, if you've seen it before, she's basically telling you you're fucked if you buy this house. Oh, children are. Oh, you have children? Children are. Children are good for the house.

Right? And you've got the old gal. You've got an old gal coming with you.

An old gal. Yes.

Yeah.

And she's like, there are centuries in this room.

You know, I miss that.

Yeah. It was like when they. When they. When they. When they were. When Peter. Not. What's his name? Ben of the father, Oliver Reed.It's like he's trying to talk her out of it, and he's just like, listen, I know. She's like, I know this place looks bad and everything, but you have to understand there are centuries in this room and this house. So it's more.There's a lot of people in this house is what you're basically saying. Anyway, so they go. Anyway. She talks them into. Hold on a second. I just pulled out my microphone, my headphone.Karen Black finagles his wife her way in. So they're renting the house for the summer. So then, yippee skippy, here they come. And they arrive at a station wagon. And two things struck me.I'm like, oh, my God, Bette Davis is making a screen appearance in this movie in a station wagon in the back seat of a station Wagon.

Yep. Smoking a cigarette. Being Betty Davis.

Uh huh. Window down. I mean, window wide closed. Smoking a cigarette.

I'm like, this is perfect. This is absolutely perfect.

Uh huh. It's. Well, it's wrong. It's wrong, but perfectly wrong, which makes it perfect. And actually, I gotta say, Bette Davis is really likable in this movie.It's a very soft performance for her.

She really is likable. And she's. You, you definitely side with her and she feels like she's kind of.There's scenes in the movie where she's kind of helpless and it's kind of sad.

Yeah, yeah.But something that I noticed this time around and you kind of touched on it, that with Karen Black getting the house in her head almost immediately, there's almost like the house is almost like an infection.

Yeah.

They each get it in a different way. Like a couple of the people, like she really, she. Something hits her at first, but Karen Black is gone.As soon as she goes up to see the collection and she opens up that music box, she's hooked. Yeah. Whatever starts to happen, happens right then.And when I'm talking about the collection, I'm talking about all those pictures that are sitting, that David mentioned. They never refer to them as photos or family. Like the brother and sister said, oh, yes, mother's collection.And then Karen Black always refers to it as the collection.

Right.

Cause these are the people that have been collected.

Right? Absolutely.

And nobody's smiling in any of the pictures either. Very creepy. And the music box is creepy. Everything's fucked up. I'm probably playing the music box thing right now. So this is good.As they're touring the house for the first time, they realize they are super stocked with food.

Ding Dongs.

Thank you, thank you, thank you. That's what I was getting to. There's two things that are great about this. First of all, when you're realizing they're like, this is amazing.Not only are we paying 900 bucks, but we've got a summer's worth of food right here. We never have to leave.

Right?

Exactly.

And there's so much drama about a light bulb.

Yes. But then. But the light bulb took care of itself. It fixed itself. No, what David said. Ding Dongs. It's this really weird piece of product placement.The annoying kid. Like they're having, though, the adults are having a conversation in the kitchen about all the food.The kid comes running and he goes, grabs Ann Elizabeth, Bette Davis, drags her to this cupboard and you can't see anything in the Cupboard. Because the lights out and you never actually show the inside of it. But he points and he goes, I think I see Ding dongs to Bette Davis.And Bette Davis is standing there like, yes, those are indeed dig dongs. Although I have seen much bigger and blacker ding dongs in my time. And if that's not enough, he says it again. Yep, those are ding dongs.

And he's like, there's a case of ding dongs. And then suddenly the light bulb fixes itself and there's this ominous music and the camera zooms in on a light bulb.

Not even on a ding dong.

No, not a ding dong, but a light bulb. Yeah.

Now, when I saw this when I was a kid, I hated Oliver Reed. I mean, I was young when I saw it. I just thought he was mean.

Yeah. I think I saw this on one of those late night movies too, when I was young. Yeah. And I remember being pretty scared by it at the time.

Me too, me too. But I didn't really know why, like elements of it, like, came back to me when I was watching it. I was like, ah, the collection.That fucking chauffeur, Right?

It's the chauffeur that.

That's the scariest thing in the movie for me.

Well, I think as a young person, I think the two things that would be the scariest were a. The chauffeur and the smile. And quite possibly my strange attraction to Oliver Reed.

Hey, I wrote that down. Oliver Reed looks really hot in his robe and shorts. And when he was working shirtless with a machete, he's hot in this movie.

I mean, no doubt.

And I also know he's a huge drunk, so that probably.

Exactly.

Which made him easy to take advantage of.

Was it him that had that naked wrestling scene in another movie with another man?

Women in love, yes. I've never seen it.

Ding Dong Patrick from the future here.

It'S 15 years later and I've seen.

The movie now and oh boy, oh boy.

Yes, it is Women in love.

And despite the title, it's not so.

Much about women in love.

It's more about men pretending they're not in love with other men. And the naked wrestling scene by the fireplace is absolutely stunning. Look it up. But not now. We got a show to finish. Ding Dong.

Back to the show. But no, I didn't get him when I was a kid and I kind of get him now because the guy that I work with in the.In the chorus or musical director is British and he. I had a talk with him One night, because we were talking, I don't know how he started talking about my life in Catholic school.And he was talking about his life in English. Prep school, boys. Prep school, Right. And he said, there's a phenomenon over there that the men that probably Justin from the.And Woody from the UK would be like, you're full of shit.But there's this phenomenon over there that they're so beaten in this school system to not have any emotions whatsoever about anything that when they get out into the real world and encounter actual things, they don't know what to do and they have breakdowns and stuff. And there's actually a great book about it that John Cleese, never mind. Never mind how to survive your family.But so when I watched this, I saw that, like he was having all these crazed emotions, but he's so British.

That he just didn't know how to handle them.

Yes. I'm afraid of my wife and I'm afraid of this house and I'm afraid of everything. And I'm having flashbacks to the chauffeur that buried my mother.And just.

Well, I really like how you said, like the house infected everybody in a different way. And sometimes a very literal way.

Yeah.Well, like when talking about your pool scene, just before everything went down, when he was cleaning the pool, Oliver Reed finds this pair of wire rimmed glasses, broken glasses, and he puts them on for a second.

Right.

And that's kind of it for him. The next time you see him in that pool, he gets really violent and you get the idea almost drowning his son.And you kind of get the idea that things are playing out the way they've done before in the past. Like, that's some untold story about those glasses. The kid has the same thing.They go for a walk in the woods and they find this weird old tricycle in a graveyard. Yeah. And after that thing starts to get weird for him.

So it happens to all of them. Yeah, it really does. And I didn't really think of it like that, which is kind of cool.

I just thought I noticed it this time just because I've seen it a million times and I was supposed to review it last year on the show, but I didn't. So I watched it recently, so things were okay. What do I have? Oh, yeah. And the pool.The pool area renews itself after that whole violent scene that scared you so much.

Right? It was pretty nasty at first. And then the very next time you see it, it looks like a resort.

It's gorgeous. And my next note is Lemon oil, my ass. That's what Karen. She's like, it's amazing what a little lemon oil will do. Fuck you.It was the pain, it was the fear, it was the anger. It was whatever they did in that pool that brought it back.

Yeah. And like, you know. Yeah. And I restored all the cracks and I. Yeah, yeah. Uh huh.

And I retiled everything. Lemon oil.

But you know, I thought, you know, speaking of like Bette Davis being so likable in this movie, especially in that scene, you know, he's roughhousing with his kid. That totally gets out of control. And then. Benji, Benji, you're acting like a fool.

Benji.

But she's like helpless on the side. And it's kind of, you know, it's an intense little scene, I think.

Yeah, it is a very intense little scene. And since we're on her, I think it's cool.Well, there's that part in the movie where, okay, all the clocks in the house are broken and there's hundreds of them, it seems like. And then all of a sudden one night they start working. And it's after that, like things really start to go haywire with the people themselves.Like Aunt Elizabeth starts to age, right. Like almost overnight, she's becoming an really old lady. Well, as Marion, it seems to be going. Starts going back in time. Did you catch this?

Oh, absolutely. Suddenly she's wearing like high collars and brooches.

Well, even before that, like she goes back into the 50s and the 60s and the 40s and it's. This is nothing that's overt. So this is why it might not resonate with younger audiences that.Cause like all this stuff that's happening, they don't point at it, right. It's just happening. And if you catch the fact that her hair keeps changing and now it's gray and now her word choices are getting odd.Her D keeps getting better and better.

Yeah. And she definitely does seem. Start to seem like she's from another time.

Yeah, yeah. But then by the end there, she shows up in that scene with the candlelight and the goblets and that red thing.

Like a thing. A shawl. Or like the.

Yeah. And I'm like, goblets? How old is this house? Or how old is the thing that's in this house?

And she's like the head of the. You know, because like she's at the head of the table and she's. It's like kind of like she's running the show.

Yeah. And she showed up at a point with a shawl and a bun and a choker. I'm like, come on, meet me in St. Louis, Louie. And nobody notices.Nobody's like, where the fuck are you getting these clothes?

Yeah. Isn't that weird that nobody commented on that?

It's so subtle.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So what do you think? So the thing started to go bad. Right. So what else went bad? The Davey.

Yeah, well, Davey's almost killed.

Yeah.

Because the gas, for some reason goes on in his room is. I mean, like, is left open even though it's the middle of summer.

Right. And nobody can get to him.

Nobody.

Get.

The door won't open. The window won't open. And now it looks. Now, like I said, Aunt Elizabeth's aging, so now she's getting forgetful.And now the family's starting to think, did Aunt Elizabeth go in there? Because she said she went in to tuck him in. That's horrible. Yeah. I mean, yeah.

Cuz then she's like, you know, maybe I did. I didn't. I would remember. It was sad.

It was really sad. She was really vulnerable in this movie. Forget it. That last scene when she was on the bed, she's all like contorted. That was crazy. Poor, poor, poor.

Are you. Are you being spoiler free? It's 20, it's 30 years old, so fuck spoiler free.

I don't think it matters. The movie is scary on its own. I mean, it's. Not to make a reference to a modern movie, but this movie's insidious.

Oh, nicely done.

No, I mean for real, it's insidious. It's like there's something horrible creeping just below the surface all the time. And you, if you're not looking, you don't notice it.

Right, Right. And it's, it's. It really has this going through the entire movie, which is what I think makes it so good.

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's a second watch movie.Cause like in the first time, I remember the first time I saw it, maybe when I saw it in high school, I'm like, this is boring. Yeah, Nothing's happening. But there's always something happening. It's just little things. Little things, little things.Little things that we're not explaining. This movie does not do any explaining, which I love too. Right.

It just assumes. Right.

It just. Yeah. I mean, it helps you paying attention and you can make up your own story because it don't really matter. You won't understand it anyway.

So if you. If the pool wasn't one of the best scenes, what do you think? One of the best scenes was when.

That fucking chauffeur shows up the second time. Yeah, just not just. Well, just not just him. Because this guy, this chauffeur is somebody that the father has been having nightmares about.It's the chauffeur that drove his mother's limousine. And he was just scary, you know, he was too pale and he had this big freaky smile and mirrored sunglasses.

And all of a sudden it's that smile.

It's the smile. This guy's got a Cheshire Cat smile. That's nothing good. There's nothing good coming out of that smile.Yeah, it's perma blasted on his face and he starts having nightmares about him again. And then the chauffeur starts showing up. And when Ann Elizabeth dies, he comes in the room.Ben is in the room with Aunt Elizabeth, taking care of her. And he's so petrified. He is frozen on the floor, unable to do anything right. And just trying to scream and trying.And just that restraint thing, I'm saying, that repression, he can't even react to this. So he just snaps.

Well, and I think what's interesting is up until now we've always thought this is just kind of in his hallucinations, right? Yeah, but Bette Davis sees him, right?

Bette Davis seemed to see him.

Yeah, she seems to see the chauffeur. So I mean, it's not just in his mind apparently.

What was that? Your earrings?

Oh, my puppy. That would be my puppy.

Uh huh.

Don't you judge me.

I'm not judging you.

It's a Friday night.

It is a Friday night. It's a Friday afternoon. For the love of God, David, are you drunk? What are you talking about? It's two o'clock in the afternoon. Of course I'm drunk.

No, that would be Alma's. You haven't met Alma. My French bulldog's collar. No, You've got to meet her. Okay, okay, I'll bring her to work sometime.

Yes. And just back to the movie. The more horrible things happen, the better the house starts to look.

Including like the greenhouse full of completely dead plants that suddenly it looks like the botanical gardens.

Uh huh. The house actually sheds at one point, like a snake.

I get that at first that they had to. He kind of said it and at first I was like, what's going on? Why are all the shingles are flying off the roof?

The shingles are flying off the roof, but there's new ones underneath it. So it's shedding like skin.

Yeah. And recreating itself.

Yes. At a Certain point where the father and son try to escape the house.

There was.

Oliver Reed got raped by a tree a la the Evil Dead.

Totally Evil Dead.

I was like, wow, I wonder if Sam Raimi got this from this movie. And the fucking stupid son just sits in the car and honks the horn going, dad, dad. I'm like, he's being raped by a tree.Get out and do something, dope ass.

And I love the fact that like the car was. It was like it was in the middle of like a ramming. He was ramming trees, he was ramming everything.The next time you see the car, it's like pristine and back to the way it was.

It's fine. And that's a really scary scene too, where Karen Black just comes in and rescues them and just takes them back to the house.Yeah, I'll take you back to the house. You're not going anywhere. But she does it all motherly. Creepy movie, creepy movie.

Very creepy. And then, you know, without totally giving away at the end, let's just say that Karen Black makes use of that one. Good eye. I think it's a great shot.

It's a great shot. If you don't want to hear the ending, I'd say fast forward about five minutes because I don't want to talk about it.Because this is the first time I actually really got the ending. So we're gonna give you five seconds. Five seconds. You have to get out of the room. Cause we're gonna talk about the ending of the movie. Ding.Okay, so of the movie, they decide to leave. Davey almost drowns in the pool.

Right?

Or did that happen?

All right, that had already happened already.

Which, by the way, he's like, dad, watch me dog paddle like an asshole in the deep end.

I'm.

I'm 14 years old and I'm dog paddling. Look at me, dad. Look at me, dad. Like I said earlier, there's a weird kind of relationship. They touch each other way too much.And they're always kind of half naked when they're doing it. It's very strange.

It is kind of true. There was a lot of uncomfortable half naked 12 year old boy that didn't have to be in there with, with.

With half naked dad.

Right?

Yes.

It seemed like a little.

He just wanted to have sex with his wife. That's all he wanted. He did. There's a scene in the pool. She's like, no, please, please, Marion.

Remember they would have sex on the lawn?

Yeah. Well, first they're in the pool and then they go to the lawn.

And she sees the light in the window and she doesn't want to do it.

Yeah. But she clearly has been, like, not giving it up for a long time because she belongs to the house now.

Right.

And Mrs. Mrs. Mrs. Mrs. What the fuck is their fucked up name? Arbangale, Something like that.

Alladice.

Allardice. I checked to see if that was an acronym for something, Was it? Couldn't come up with anything because it's such a weird name.

It is a weird name.

Yep. Anyway, I guess it was after that whole thing that Karen says, you're right. We're leaving. Let's go. They pack up the car and why.

Does she decide to go? Like, why?It seemed kind of strange to me that, you know, she's so part of the house and then, you know, something jars inside her that she's okay, we're gone.

I don't know. Maybe because he started talking again because he was. Whatever happened with the chauffeur?Oliver Reed was so frightened, he stopped talking and basically couldn't move. It was kind of tonic, right? Until David drowned. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know what the hell it was. Whatever. Karen Black. Her eye saw something.You're horrible. But they're packed up and they're leaving. They're leaving. They're in the car.And she goes, you know, I really should just check on Mrs. Alla Dice before we go. And it's just like, come on.

You just know from that moment on, you're like, come on.

This is what I thought was interesting. In this last scene when they're packing up the car, that gray streak in her hair is gone.

Yeah, that's true. That's true. It was.

Yeah. And again, this is me being awesome film critic and, like, totally smart. She went back in the house, and I thought one thing.I never thought this before. Lot's wife.

Oh, yeah.

She turned back and fucked him all up.

Yeah.

So she goes back in and she goes to check on Mrs. Allen Dice, and she never comes back out. So Aubrey goes in and fucked. And I don't even understand this completely. I do, but I don't. Like, it's hard to put into words.

I mean, she never existed. Right?

Here's my thing, okay? Because he opens the door, and now Karen Black is the old woman. She's aged. She's sitting in the chair. She throws him out the window.Her eyes are green now, but I kind of got the impression this time, again, for the first time, I'm like, the old lady is the house. The house is the old lady. Whenever they. Whenever they refer to the house, they refer to our. They were always talking about our mother.And they refers to both the house and the old woman as their mother.

That's kind of cool, actually.

Yeah. So I'm thinking like the. This thing, it's like. It's really about her. It's like the mother.Whatever, the mother of the family, it becomes the mother of the house. And the house goes on because it's got a new mother.

Right.

It absorbs her or whatever. I don't really understand on a full level. And then the rest of them are just food.

Right. And so then tell them what happened to Davey.

Well, well. Olivery goes flying out the window, lands smack on the station wagon where Dave is sitting. He's like, dad.

Pretty graphic for 1976, right? I mean.

Oh yeah, it was pretty graphic. His face goes through the. The windshield. It's just bleeding all over the poor kid. Dad.

No.

Mom. Dad.

Mom.

Then eventually the chimney falls on him in the longest slow motion scream ever. Really high, really long.

Yeah, but I mean, I think it was pretty. It was pretty creepy and dramatic. Like to have this huge chimney fall on this little boy.

Yeah. This tiny little boy. Even the house is like, shut up. Shut up. You're so annoying.

Sick of you. 2 hours ago I hated you and Ben.

Thank you for that awful song. And then the final shots is them. It's the Allardyces. The other. They're back and they're like, oh, isn't she beautiful? She's so beautiful. Again. Again.She. Who are we talking about? Talking about the house. We're talking about Karen Black.

Yeah.

Either way. What? Doesn't matter. And the final shot is just the collection again with the jukebox playing.

Fucking slow pan across. And the slow pan across the pictures.

And there's three new pictures. Benji, Davey and Ann Elizabeth. Apparently Hal has a Sears portrait studio.

Yeah, because everybody else's was like kind of this little size. Theirs was like practically an 8 by 10 gloss.

They were all different sizes too. But. Yeah, well, you know, they're the stars. But maybe they get smaller over time. Maybe the pictures get eaten over time too. But I love this movie.

I really do too. I think it's a great movie. And surprisingly scary and disconcerting, I think.

And aged well. That's really not dated. There's nothing dated about it. Except for the Dial Telephone. All the lines are dead. That part was good too.All the lines are busy. No matter what line, it was busy.

My boyfriend hates Scary movies. And I took him to this. I'm like, oh, come on, it's from 1976. There won't be anything scary about it. It'll be fine.He was creeped out by it and kind of pissy with me afterwards.

Deservedly. I mean, I would have thought that Heddaladis might have tempered some of that.

She really was pretty. I thought she was, for the most part, pretty respectful of it. And she wasn't as throughout as she often is on this one.

Well, good for her. Good for her. She knows how to do her shit.

Yeah, but it's also. It's on Netflix instant streaming, too. Although, did you see the description?They say some friends from California gather an old house and discover things going wrong.

Like, what does it really.

That's what it says.

I'm on Netflix right now. I'm pulling it up. Doopey doopy doopy doopy doo. Slow connection. Okay. Mine doesn't say that, but I think for it that maybe they fixed it. The vacation.The vacationing Marion David and Ben Lizbeth.

Yeah, that's totally not what mine said. Mine said some friends from California vacation in an old house and things go wrong.

Maybe that was. Bent offerings. Bent awfulings.

Exactly. That's like the. Isn't that the gay porn version?

And by the way, nothing gets burnt in this movie. But have you read the book?

I have not read the book.

I have not read the book. My friend Owen has told me about the book. He says it's very close, but yet very different. And nothing burns in the book either.

I wonder if the book is creepier.

It probably is. It probably is. He loves the book, but he also likes. Well, never mind. He also likes the pirate movie with Christie McNichol.

Oh, well, I mean, there are reasons to like the pirate movie.

Yeah, but not. Not these reasons.

Right?

It's a really good adaptation of the Pirates of Pen sets. No, it's not. No, it's really not.

You like the pirate movie. The same reason you like the Blue Lagoon.

Well, he doesn't have his butt out in this one.

I know. That's a shame, but he's.

No, but I mean, if any people are like. I don't understand the title. Like people on Netflix. You know, those stupid people coming. Like the title. Nothing gets that unfollow.I'm like, it's a religious reference. Sacrifices.

Right.

So they are all the sacrifices to the mother. So, anyway, last thoughts.

No, that's about it. I just think if you haven't seen this one, this is a good one.

This is a great one. And young ones learn patience.

There are some movies that really kind of start slow and you're like, okay. But then they really pay off.

Uh huh. Uh huh.

What was the movie about? The twins that you got me hooked on? The Other boys. The other great movie. Feels kind of the same. Has some creepiness to it. It's just.Just made me think of.

Think of that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Very similar. Very similar. And I. What I love about the other is that 90% of it is in this book.Yellowy sunshine, ain't it a beautiful morning? Kind of setting.

Right.

It looks like the fucking set of the Waltons.

Right?

But this. But there's something very wrong going on in that movie. And even if you know the big twist, it doesn't matter. It's still fucked up.

Right? Right.

And anyway. But are we talking about that? No, we're not. We talk about Burn Offerings. And we're done talking about burn offerings. Awesome.All of the music for tonight's show, unless otherwise specified, has been written by Sam Haynes.

You can find all of his music@www.bandcamp.com.