Thanks for Making Me Cry, Super Bowl!! | Episode #307 | NSFW

0:00 It's you, tag folks. But first, dad jokes. My children used to ask me a lot of questions. They no longer ask me questions because I figured out a system in my home. I've given them both a notebook and a pen. And three times a day in my home, I hold a press conference. [LAUGHTER] And that is the only time you are allowed to ask me a question. And then I start, thank you for coming. [LAUGHTER] I'm going to start the press conference. Go ahead and go, Olivia, ladies first. First question. Why does your puppy dog stick to the refrigerator? Well, it's a picture of a puppy.

0:40 There's a magnet on the back of it. The magnet stick to metal. The refrigerator is made of metal. That's why your puppy dog sticks to the refrigerator. Great question. [LAUGHTER] Isaac, next question. Yeah, sometimes the green jelly beans can be tricky. You stick it in a mouth. You think it's lime and it's spearmen, and spearmen sucks. [LAUGHTER] Right? Watch your ass. Smell your jelly beans. [LAUGHTER] Great question. Olivia, next question. There is a magnet on the back of it. [LAUGHTER] [LAUGHTER] Isaac, next question.

1:30 Why does your sister cry all the time? Well, that's a great question. I think a lot of people in this house want an answer to that. For starters, as you know, we have wooden floors all over our home, and she runs around in wool socks, like there's not going to be consequences. Not to mention the fact that Crazy never watches where she's going. Do you remember when she hit her face on the side mirror of my car? Oh my god. How did you not see your face coming at you? [LAUGHTER] You never thought there's my face, but here's my face. [LAUGHTER] Question of the year, buddy. Question of the year.

2:10 Olivia, next question. It is a fucking magnet. [LAUGHTER] Wake up, daddy, son. [MUSIC PLAYING] Welcome. Welcome, everybody, to episode number 307307, if you're keeping scored home of Dad's Home Podcast. I'm Bauer. That is the Chad Dad with the sweet handle bar, mustache. How many weeks in progress is that? What are we-- can we do weeks? Yeah, I know. Three weeks in.

2:51 So-- That's three weeks? Yeah, dude. Yeah. It's nuts. You are a hairy bastard. That is amazing in three weeks. This has been four months. This little horrible go-t, I've got going on, is just four months. And I feel like it's just starting right now. And I will promise that by saying, though, I had a mustache already gone with the beard thing. And it was trimmed back. And then I was just like, handle bar time. Let's go. Now, do you have-- Is there-- OK, because I just don't know. Is there-- Yeah, I have to. Pacific-- is there a handle bar mustache wax specific to what you're doing there? Or is there-- what are you using?

3:32 Yeah, so it's funny. I've tried the mustache wax. It's pretty good. It breaks down by the end of the day. So I look a little bit like-- Like for-- Or the best for good. The Jim Carrey bad guy in Sonic the Hedgehog, which is just like, it's just-- You know, 70 Sam by the end of it. That's right. I am with a little busier. OK. But this, believe it or not, this beautiful gem of a mustache has been going hard all day. Looks just like this. I woke up, put this stuff in it. It's actually the same stuff I put in my hair. OK, so it's like a hair gel, a hair upon a-- This is your mustache. Yeah, it works in my hair, works in my mustache. So a little bit pow.

4:12 And now, what is it going to have you developed yet officially, the habit of the twist at the right time? Like it's one thing to just twist it like kind of out of habit. Like, well, you know, I'm not doing anything right now. I'm listening to somebody on a phone call or everybody's joining the Zoom meeting, and I'm doing a little twist there. But is there-- have you developed a habit that comes with-- We need to talk. Or do you know when you do a little easel kind of look? Yeah, well, so it's-- it's actually when I make a pass at my wife. I'm like, hey, baby. How does-- Give it a little twist. Give it a little look, you know? Give it a little twinkle in the eye and a little twist on the mustache. Not for nothing.

4:53 That's a good flavor, you have there. I'm wondering. It just looks a little-- Texas, Long Horns, I get it. Hocus-jong. You've got a stash. It looks like it's a little pointy on either side. There has there been an errant jab from the mustache that she wasn't expecting. No. No. OK. But it does occasionally, if there is kissing, which happens two or three times a year. Right. Lucky you. I know, right. I know. Oh, yeah, I'll have the rest of y'all out there and chillin' a brag of it. Three times a week. Three times a year. No, but sometimes during the kissing, she's like, oh, it's tickling.

5:35 Very nice. But look, I'm just saying in a little bit, it might take a night out. You've got to be careful. You could. It could. Yeah. Are you going for the Raleigh fingers? Like, do you think you're going to go swooping out rather than the cheekbones kind of a thing? I have not thought very much about that. However, a couple of years back, I got a book for Christmas. OK. Like all this-- as I just called Beards, but it was like this photographer decided to go to this international best-beard competition in the-- Oh, nice. Canada, I don't remember it was. Yeah. And-- You took pictures of all these dudes that had these fantastic beards and moustaches and just exotic stuff and then perfect stuff.

6:19 And so I may have to dig back in and I'll try to find some inspiration and go, that guy, although Raleigh fingers is absolutely like-- he could be since we're starting to walk in the softball season. Yeah. He is iconic for the first time. He's more moustache. So yeah, I think it's a perfect-- if you're looking for a poster child, Raleigh fingers is the poster child still. He's my go-to. Yeah. And unfortunately, though, I can't shave the beard off, which I'd like to see what it looked like, you know? Right with just-- Ooh. Just the moustaches. You had no-- I'm almost thinking if you had the three musketeers, like the Hannah Barba Star for the Google Go T right there, it was like this little slot of-- Yeah, sure. Yeah.

7:00 It's pretty cool. That'd be perfect. I know what I'm-- I know what I'm going to be for Halloween now. There you go. I love you. Thank you. Of the one and one for all. [LAUGHS] All right, now look, I'm going to say this, and I'm just going to leave the warning out there in that I feel like I wish that I could grow a mustache like that, but I quite frankly don't have the patience the way it is these days. I feel like between-- like I like the idea of the Palm Age/Handle Bar moustache, Dar Tannion, but I'm going to say that I feel like it's a little too much upkeep for me. Like I tried to do the cool hipster beard thing there for a little bit, and I got good growth on it.

7:44 I had this kind of a cool thing because the sides of my beard were dark. I was like wolverine here, and then it's right over the mustache and the go-t was all gray. It kind of had a cool look, too. I kind of dug it. When you have to start putting oil on the beard, and then all the trimming you got to put into it, I'm like, oh, fuck this. Are you kidding me? I don't want to have to go through this again. So I feel like just it's my patience, or I'm not nearly high enough. I don't know what it is. It could be a combination of the both. But I do feel like there's a little too much work that I have to go into the upkeep for the beard. So I usually try to keep it a little closer trim. But damn, does that look good? You got me jealous. - Thanks, man. Thanks, yeah. And for a while, there are two of the way my hair speaking of different colors was going.

8:28 I had the Hugo Drax look going. That James Bond villain from-- - Yes. - Moonraker is just too little white patches right here and everything else was dark. And so he's also kind of in my list of possible Halloween. - There's good ones this, there's good ones that. - With the beard, you got a bun with it. - Yeah, I think we haven't seen enough since Brian-- Since Keefer Sutherland was a fucking three musketeer and Brian Adams was doing the music from home. - Oh my God. - We haven't seen that. Chris O'Donnell was one of the three musketeers. Oh, and, oh, crap, what was his name?

9:09 He was in that whole little group that was catching on in the late 90s there. Keefer Sutherland and he did, they Julia Roberts, whatever the good looking Baldwin brother, they all did flatliners together, all of her Pratt. So it was-- - Oh, that's Pratt. - And if I remember correctly, Chris O'Donnell that played in the three musketeers movie with Brian Adams doing the music on that. So-- - That sounds right. - We need more of the big hats for dudes with the big feathers on it. I think it would be a good thing for you for Halloween. - I should. - That'd be awesome. - Yes, yes. - Bring it back, man. Hasn't been back since 2001. When was that movie made? - Let me see. - To 1993.

9:50 - Are you kidding me? - No, really? - Yeah, Charlie Sheen Keefer Sutherland, Chris O'Donnell. - Oh, Oliver Platt, yep. - Okay. - That crew. - Okay, all right. - 1993. - All right, there you go. All right, so since 1993. It hasn't been out since I-- So you're, I mean, you're looking at a good solid 12 year, 22 year, 22 year plan here to get this going. - Yeah, yeah. - Anyway, I think that's the move. I would go three musketeers on this one. - All right, done. - Which by the way, I heard a report, I'll have to check this out, that Keefer Sutherland may have covered Phil Collins in the air tonight. - No. - Nice one.

10:32 - Keefer Sutherland, Keefer Sutherland fancies himself a rock star. In addition to being Jack Bauer from 24, Keefer Sutherland fancies himself a rock star, and has had a band. A lot like, you know, the Kevin Costner's or any number of other, you'd Steven Suga-- - David, David Hasselhoff. - David Hasselhoff. - But Keefer has got himself a little rock band that he goes out, he's a little bit here and there. And apparently, there's something out on social media recently that he's covered Phil Collins in the air tonight. I'll have to see if I can find that during one of the breaks. - I'll have to show it. - Keep the stuff going up, throw it out. - Eat. But coming up on the show here today, we're gonna thank the Super Bowl for making us cry coming up in a couple minutes here. Plus, some of us-- - I'm not crying, you're crying.

11:14 - It's a little dusty around the Super Bowl, it's dusty. Yes, it was indoors, yes, it was turf, but it was a little dusty. Also, the gifts that you wish your Valentine's would get for you. We're kind of talking last week about how, there's just too much gift in going on for kids and how with Valentine's Day coming up, you're expected to have a big basket of things and then the chocolates and then the cards and it's a whole ordeal and we're over-presenting everything. But if you're gonna do that, I've got a couple of ideas that we can throw our kids away for at least mom's way, whatever the case may be for Valentine's Day gifts that we might actually be interested in. And then this, I think, is gonna be fun because we're gonna talk about Gen Z's favorite, what they call older people things.

11:55 Now, I wonder if this may just go really deep and maybe I've had too much of my vape, my vape, but it's almost like, I think it's Gen Z's favorite older people things, but I think it's what us older people think they think is older people stuff. Does that make sense? - Yeah, so we're like, yeah, those Gen Z kids must think rotary phones are a riot. - Thank you, thank you very much. And I'm thinking, like, I'm talking about it with my 17 year old daughter, she's like, what are you guys doing on the podcast? And so we're gonna talk about what Gen Z's favorite older people things are. Just like, good like green day? I'm like, (laughing) I think it's like, people want to go see green day.

12:35 She's like, no, I mean, you guys think it's old. I like it. I don't think it's old. I'm like, okay, so are you saying that these are things that we think you think is old and really isn't old? I don't wanna get into too deep to that. I just wanna talk about what it is that some Gen Z's think is old. But we're like, just, it was second nature to us, right? It's just, we'll get to some of that coming up in just a little bit here. Plus, if you thought what your kid needed for their birthday was a healthy dose of adrenaline chunky, get ready. The 2025 worst parent bracket is revving up here tonight. So that's all coming up. - We're gonna start off with, I wanna grab some Kleenex.

13:19 Start off with some Kleenex, 'cause there was a commercial during the Super Bowl. Now I will say this, before we get to the dream job commercial at question here, I started watching, I was watching the Super Bowl with my family and maybe you have a similar situation. First of all, I could give a shit about either team. I frankly, I wanted both teams to lose. I knew that wasn't gonna happen, but I wanted both teams to lose. I didn't want either team to win. I was in a foul mood for the most part, most of the game just because my lions weren't there. And frankly, I felt like, hey Kendrick Lamar did a fantastic job doing whatever he did at halftime, but it wasn't for me.

14:02 That was zero entertainment value for me. I'm like, is that Venus Williams that's for what reason? I don't understand why she's there. I'd have everything explained to be my bad daughter. But the point here, this commercial comes on and I'm catching it at the beginning. I'm like, oh, this is kind of cool. And then my 17 year old daughter starts crying because of the commercial. And she's like, did you see that, dad, did you see? And I'm like, I'm trying to watch it right now. If you could just, I'm gonna watch it with you. Maybe I'll feel some of the emotion that you're feeling right now. If you just give me a second to feel it and then the commercial's over. So I had to go back and revisit the commercial again because I didn't feel that emotion initially.

14:46 But when I did watch it again, I cried my eyes out. It was very dusty wherever I was watching. - I watched it live, caught it with no interruptions by anybody in the eye. And that commercial, no matter who was around it. - That was it. - Yeah, seriously, that's really exactly what happened to me. And I lost it. I lost it at the end. - Yeah, there's, the whole thing, it builds, it builds, and I think it's where I am and probably you are with our kids headed off to college. - Yes. - And yeah, I'm not spoiling anything because every, like, you know, a billion people saw this commercial. - Yes.

15:26 - At the end of it, you know, he's like, yeah, people can count, depend on me, right? Girls, he's taking his girl off to college, dropping her off. It's that he's in the car, she's gone. - And then she's walking for half way down the walkway. And then she comes back, hugs him, and then you see the scene of him hugging the little version of her and then-- - Like, all the way through. - Yeah, and you're like, oh my God, that's all of that. That's what hit me as well. Like, all of it, I was kind of like, oh, oh, oh, and then I sobbed at the very last part of that now. - Oh, God. I just watched it earlier tonight and I was crying. I mean, I am drinking a screwdriver with Fizz right now that I'm hoping will occupy my time while we play this video so that I don't end up crying again.

16:09 But just as we give a little disclaimer here, there might be some sobbing as we play this commercial. So-- - Working across several different groups. - I'm gonna take us off the screen. - You know what, let me practice that one again. - Okay, when you're ready, tell me about the job that taught you the most. - Okay. - Well, it was a role where I learned to take constructive criticism. - I think she thought, oh, no, it doesn't like it. - I got pretty used to, you know, working long hours with a small team. I got very comfortable multitasking, and I had to become really organized. - Not bad, but try rephrasing your answer to sound more confident.

16:51 - Right, right, okay. I was asked to make a lot of quick decisions and do a lot of negotiating. - One more book. - Talk about your experiences working with others. - Oh, well, I'm at my best when I'm collaborating. If it's for the team, do whatever it takes. - This job description you shared mentions on the job training. - Well, I am a fast learner. I don't always have all the answers, but I get the job done, look at it. No matter how long it takes. (laughing) And I'm not afraid to admit when I'm wrong. But most importantly, I show up every day, no matter what.

17:36 - All right, last question. When it comes to work, what motivates you? - I guess knowing that people can depend on me. - Here it comes. And knowing I can depend on them too. - Hmm. That's a great answer. Sounds like you're ready. (soft music) - Hey James, thanks for joining us. - It's good to see you all. I've been looking forward to talking.

18:17 Man, that was good. That was good. And even I didn't get it until this very minute here, but at the end where there's the little pink posted that says good luck, dad right there on the mouse pad. Wow, all of it, all of it was amazing. And I just, I feel like you're right. I feel like for us who we both have seniors graduating this year that are ready to head off to college that I've realized perhaps in the better part of the last two weeks that there's, I got a very limited amount of time, left where my eldest is going to be at home. And it hasn't, it hadn't kicked in until I saw that video and really officially is like, whoa, okay, that's real life.

19:04 That's what's happening. You and I are inside of five months. I'll call it inside of six months before it doesn't live in our house anymore. Yeah, half of you. - And I feel like I know people that were a year older than my daughter that went through this all last year that from the graduation and everything before that proms and all the cool stuff that goes on at school, all of that. So the end of playing softball for some of these girls that when they wind up their senior year and they finish playing for the school, then they do maybe play out their travel play for the summer. Once fall rolls around and they're heading off the college, they're not sticking around a play softball anymore. So they're kind of like that.

19:44 So all of that I had seen and I'd been viewing it. I've been watching it. I've been seeing friends on Facebook. Boy, this really hit home. Like seeing that commercial really, really hit home and made me realize, and I hope you feel the same way, made me realize how much I have loved being a dad. How much I have just, it's probably my favorite thing. It's probably the one of the biggest and hardest decisions that I had to make and the way that it had to go down for myself and for my wife, but my God. It was so, I mean, we tell her this every single day, totally, and with Lucky not only so worth it, but so planned, like we were ready.

20:25 We knew that we wanted you. We were so excited to bring you into our lives and to have you be a part of it. And then you fast forward because 17 years seems like an awful long time until you're in the middle of it. You know, like, holy shit, that went by so fast. But it has been my favorite thing to do. It's been, that's what I will always, I will always list first when, you know, speaking of in this particular case, the dad's going through getting a new job after being what appears to be like a stay at home dad and all of that's been fantastic for him. I feel like the first thing, when anybody asks me what I do, is I'm always the first response for me as I'm a dad.

21:06 And I've got a 17 year old and a 10 year old. And I kind of open that way before I even think about what I've done in my professional career. It's always been the dad part of things first. It's, and it's definitely better to lead with the dad thing than your oldie fans. Oh, yeah, so. I mean, just a pro tip, pro tip. Right. And I get it. And don't get me wrong. I don't say exclude the only fans. I say say the for the end. Let them know at the end. Yeah. Let them make up their minds and the kids and coach and worked in radio for years. I also have a foot fetish site that I can boast.

21:47 I can boast 1200 fans who support me on only fans. So that's right. There you go. That's, that's, that's amazing. That's a great way. That's a, that's what I call a side hustle right there. That's, that's, that's a, that's a, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It folks to take this like funny, but he just, he threw that one to me underhand. That was easy to teach right up for you. I was going to say that I will say if you go to only fans.com/side hustle, that's what my handlers are all of this. Perfect. Perfect. No, I, so to your point about being a dad, it is, it is also how I define myself. Like, it is the one thing. If I'm having a bad day, I'm like, yeah, but you're a fucking awesome dad.

22:30 And, you know, I, I know it's true. I have people tell me that all the time. I tell myself that so I legit. And so it's, it because it's so integral into who I am. That's why that ad hit. And the way that ad hit to where he has this like, ah, moment there in front of the refrigerator at the beginning, where he's, and he thinks about his, his answer, right? And it's being, now I'm going to tell him about my dad because that's who I am. And that's going to tell everybody the most about me. I loved that. And that, that hit home for me too.

23:10 That was, that was the other part of this that made this so much. It's, it's so, it, that much harder. Yeah. And again, for those of you who saw the video on YouTube, you know, we're talking about a shot at the Super Bowl, you know, we're talking about, but those of you listening for the first time here, the guy's talking about applying for a job and obviously is using AI on his phone to help him get prepared for an interview that he's got coming up. But to talk about what his experience was and have that be as you're living your life through the commercial with him, everything he was doing to raise his daughter until the very end where she's going off to school. She's going off to college and then has a hug where she comes, he's crying in the car. She comes back over through the open window, gives him a hug. She's crying right along with him.

23:52 And then there's a quick shot where it flashes to him hugging a probably a five year old daughter that was his. And then back to the girl who's going to school, all of that together. I mean, I think that all of us who our parents have realized that we could legitimately, I mean, management positions, leadership roles and companies, we've done all of that. Even if we haven't done it for a company or for, you know, 10 to 15 people in a group that serves underneath us, we have done all of that just by being a parent, everything from the stepping in when you needed to have that happen decisions that had to be made quickly. Look, none of us are perfect.

24:33 And I think that's the best part of being a parent is not being perfect and not being perfect in front of your kids so that they don't think you're perfect. But at the end of the day, they know you're human. And at the end of the day, they know that you've loved them cared for them and done your best. And that's what makes me feel like the parent that I am. It makes me feel like the father. I know I haven't been right in everything. I know when he says you had to apologize and he slides a note under the door that says, "I'm sorry." How many times have I had those conversations, you know? And so with all of that, it, that encompassed everything that I went through as a parent and just kind of shown it in one, two minute clip during the Super Bowl that was so important to just see.

25:19 I think it's, I think it's good to reflect on that. And even if you don't have a kid that's graduating from high school like Chad and I do, but you've got a child that's moving from sixth grade to seventh grade or is just even moving up a grade and is going to become a fourth grader now. You, this is a time to reflect on that because, you know, as Chad and I can both tell you, there's not that much time. There's not an infinite amount of time. They'll always be your baby. They'll always be your child, but you don't have an infinite amount of time with them under your roof and, and, and in your every day to day activities. You just don't and that will wrap up far too soon than you want it to. And that way, you know, they, having a kid too, you know, they grow up from being little babies all the way to 18 and in each stage as they go through that or era, as we're not supposed to say, each one of their ears.

26:14 Right. That's a, you're going to have to put money in the jar for that one for the old man. We're going to have an old man jar on the dad's. We should, yeah, like we're not allowed to say according to, uh, we were have to check superior state university. If the kids say and late superior state says that's a tip jar, an old man tip jar, uh, we're going to put money in the tip jar for a second. But my point is is that the, uh, the amount of change that they go through and each one of those stages, it's so different. And, you know, you, you're really never prepared for the next stage in the next thing, um, but each one of those stages, it's so important to stop and, uh, think about it.

26:56 Stop and beat it. Yeah, stopping be, but, but have some reverence for the moment and remember it because each one of those as they change, I was just the other day, I was thinking about this as like shit. My kids are all teenagers. Yeah. And I was like, Oh, man, do you remember when we could like put them to bed and you'd have a few minutes as a parent after they all are asleep up. Remember what it would have downstairs? Remember what they were. Yeah. When they'd have to. But now because they were napping. Yeah. What? And like now my kids put me to bed. It's like, they're all, they're all staying up late and stuff. And, and I'm like, Oh, go to bed guys. They come in and they give me a hug and I'm like, okay, guys, just remember to remember because I'm going to be out in five minutes. So it's seriously, but it's just those little things like that, those moments where it, I, are so, so, so important as a parent.

27:43 Yeah. And I don't think that you can, I don't think you can over estimate or over even state that. I think for those parents who don't know, realize how important it is to be in that. And, and for those parents who do know, those are the, the truly important times that you're going to remember. Those are the things you're going to have a thing from each of those stages. And just when you're like, this couldn't get any tougher. And the next stage starts happening and it feels like it's tougher. Those are the most important times that you are going to remember being hard, but so, so very worth it. And I, and I, the only other thing that I would say, and this is, for me, for the better part of the last year, maybe even the last two years, I've tried really hard.

28:27 I've gone out of my way to make sure I was available to my, by junior and now senior age daughter, to be there for little things, to be there and, and it's shit that I wouldn't normally care about. I don't care. You know, about the, the makeup that you're wearing or the nails that you've got done for no apparent reason other than you just wanted to do it, but boy did I ask questions and did I want to be a part of her life and all of that and just, just experience the happiness that she was experiencing. So, again, there's, it's not an infinite amount of time that you have to, to hang with them. So be a sponge, soak it up and, and enjoy everything you can because there will be a time when you like the dad in that car after you're taking her to school to college where you're going to miss that.

29:17 So really soak it up for all that you can, I think is probably what I, and it really did, the commercial really did make me cry and think about all of that. I've literally spent, you know, the last three or four days thinking about all of that and, and just kind of watching her, you know, in moments of practice at softball or studying and, and saying like, you know, as I, as I usually go to bed early, going, as she's watching some softball on ESPN and I'm like, Hey, let me to watch the rest of the game with you and she's like, no, I got some studying to do and I'm like, okay, all right, but we'll watch them tomorrow. Sound good? Yeah, sounds good. I mean, it's just, I want to get as many of those moments in as I can. So, Amen, brother. Yeah, yeah.

29:57 So do it. You get, get those moments in and really, really enjoy it. I think that that's, that's, even if you weren't thinking that your parenting was going to be either the thing that you were the best at or the thing you were most proud of or the thing that you enjoyed the most, you'll realize it at some point that that's, that's what defines you. And even more so than you're an astronaut or a politician or a businessman or an entrepreneur, it's going to be what you did as a dad that will mean the most, I think, to you at the end of the day. So, enjoy it. Enjoy it, dad. Why doesn't it mean the most to you then you're a psychopath?

30:38 You should, what the fuck are you doing? Listen to this show. All right. Yeah, really? That said, let's get some real quick Valentine's Day thoughts while we're in this lovey-dovey kind of mode. Sure. I was trying to think of things, yeah, hugs. I was trying to think of things that, what would I be interested in receiving as a gift as a father for Valentine's Day that might actually be legit? It might be something worthwhile. It might be something that, you know, I would, I don't know if I would use it so much, I would think I'd be interested in at least opening it and have some excitement from it because there are times, let's be honest, in the times in the years and the presence that you've gotten for Christmas or Father's Day or whatever might be, maybe, maybe not.

31:22 There's some good things that you like in there. Maybe, maybe not. There's some things that you're like, where did you guys get this idea from? Because I don't know where this would have come from before. Who told you I wanted this? Right. Did you hear me talk about this before? Because I'm not sure where this has come from. And so it's not necessarily that as far as your first choice goes, right? So these are things I thought would be fun that every dad might get a little kick out of. So I thought I would bring two to the table. But if you are looking for gifts for your significant other, for a friend, if you're thinking for another dad and Valentine's Day may not be the most proper time, but you can get away with gift giving, I think at that point, you never know. You never know, especially when it's gifts like this, because you're not getting lingerie for your, for your, your dude friend, at least that I'm aware of.

32:08 You shouldn't be getting any lingerie for your dude friend, but if they're a dad, right? But could you get them? How about the 50th anniversary celebration of Atari games? Huh? That's kind of cool. Because it's seen, I mean, right? Send me the link so I can set it to my kids. Let's go. Talking about so it's the 50th anniversary celebration, the expanded edition for 30 bucks. What a deal on Amazon. You're getting not just the Atari 50, there's a steel book edition for 40 bucks. So for an additional 10 bucks, you actually get this book in here that's got like, it's like a coffee table book for old Atari games. How cool is that? And then you're getting what is in essence, you've seen the Nintendo ones, right?

32:51 That are the kind of the revised small additions all with a chip now. So it's so much easier than putting the cartridge in or having to blow on the cartridge to put it in and play your Nintendo game. So they've got these. It's all inclusive and it's got all of the games from pong all the way through whatever you expect pitfall, whatever your favorite Atari games were are all included in this edition for the 50th anniversary of Atari. Now this one probably if I could get my my daughter, my Gen Z daughter to sit down and play some of these games, she'd probably think this was a pretty cool old guy. I think to have I can't help but think that she wouldn't feel that way, right? But I think and it doesn't she's a psychopath again.

33:32 She was there. She's as much a psychopath at that point, right? I mean, come on. You who wouldn't love that? Seriously. So yeah, I'm going to just take actually I'm going to go right now take some money out of my kids account, right? And buy this gift with that money and then on Valentine's Day, it's going to be wrapped up downstairs and it's going to have you know, two dad from the kids. You're going to say thank you to them for all of this. You're like, that is such an amazing gift that you got for dad. I didn't think you knew that much about Atari. I didn't think you cared, but yet here you are and I appreciate that. So I think that that's a good idea. Now, on the other side of that, I have I socks that you've gotten for Father's Day or for Christmas.

34:13 It's happened to all of us, right? Maybe you've gotten the hand painted and handmade coffee mug or plate or that kind of a thing. Have you gotten those? What is that? Socks with a handle bar mustache on it? Oh, I might have gotten that. Staying there. Okay. Now, I'm going to go a little different. I'm going to make it coffee mug, but I'm going to make it more fun because while we're having our coffee first thing in the morning, I oftentimes think it's not enough on my message to be world's greatest dad. That's fun. That's nice. That's awesome. What I really need is I love being woke. It's much nicer than being an ignorant fucking twat. And for 1299, again, I've kept everything $40 or less for a Valentine's Day gift and who I that would make my coffee taste so much better.

35:05 I mean, my wife, I tried when we first moved to Michigan, we moved like right around her birthday and it was tough to we were moved literally moving in like two days before her birthday. So like it gives. I'm wrapping paper anywhere in the house. I'd to wrap stuff with newspaper, which she fucking railed on me about. But the point is is that what I wanted to get for her was a cup that she loved, a coffee cup, the just set in like the prettiest, it was like the most beautiful, almost like pink china coffee cup, like really pretty with the handle. You have to use the little pinky thing when you're sipping it, right? And on it in beautiful gold handwriting, it said fucking cunt. That's what she wanted her birthday.

35:46 I think it's brilliant. Oh my god. I for the life of me couldn't find it anywhere online or any place else anywhere near me on this particular birthday. I couldn't find it. So I tried to come up with a different one that was like as you're lifting the coffee cup up on the bottom, it's got the middle finger flipping you off. So whoever you're drinking coffee with, it's flipping them off. And she thought it meant something totally different than what I was intending it to be. She was like, are you saying, no, there's no message for you, honey. I was trying to make this a fun coffee cup. Yeah, for you, so you can use that message, I will you're telling me your fuck off. That's what I see in the morning when you're drinking your coffee. But this I thought was brilliant. I love the, I love being woke.

36:26 It's much better. It's much nicer than being an ignorant fucking plot. So there are things out there that we can get for each other Valentine's day or around, the gift giving holidays. Maybe you're getting, you're not sure what to get somebody for that wonderful daylight savings time gift that'll be coming up here in mid March. I know. Thanks for reminding me too. I need to run out and get a daylight savings present from my wife. I would even just get the, when you go to hallmark, pick up to the card so you've got some for future. Oh, yeah. Have they, have they dropped that when you were there, did they drop the Arbor Day cards? Yeah, or those? I've just seen those yet, but they were opening a box of ornaments. So I'm guessing they were Arbor Day ornaments. That would be more. Okay.

37:07 That's big sense. Yeah. Seems about, seems about the right time. But anyway, I just thought those would be a couple of fun little gifts. If there's anything else, the, the you guys are seeing dads that you think are, are, are, are, are absolutely interesting. Reach out to us at realguyradio.com. You can post a message right there. You can leave a voicemail right there. You can do anything and everything at realguyradio.com. Hit us up and let us know what some of those other gifts are that dads would really appreciate. More importantly, you really appreciate. I remember the best Easter basket I ever got from my family was one that they put together that was an Easter basket filled with chips and salsa and Mexican beer. That was in the basket. It was the best, I still brag about that gift all the time. The best gift anybody's ever given me.

37:48 Probably cost them, you know, a six pack and maybe an additional 10 bucks for chips and salsa. And man, was it the best thing that I ever had? So again, what's useful and what we would enjoy doesn't necessarily have to be this big extravagant thing. I don't need different types of weird jerky. It's been, you know, dry, chip chips from right. I don't need that. Give me some chips and salsa and some Mexican beer and a lime and I am solid and ready to go for Easter. All right. When we come back, we might sound like old men. We might look like old men, although you look incredibly cool with that mustache. I may look like an old man. I do look like an old man. I don't know what I'm talking about, but is it what Gen Zers think is old?

38:29 Is it, am I perfect for that older person? We'll find out when we come back here in the dad's own podcast. You know, your front lawn under your porch on the side of the highway where you can store all that stuff my way down here. Jones, big ass truck, we're doing cost storage. Now, I know y'all got stuff at your house that you don't need. No more, you don't want? You know you ain't gonna use that printer? Why keep it all around your house? Bring it down here in my house. You ain't deduce the hazard. You know, he's gonna use that ugly yellow you lugage? You don't need all this crap, but you're gonna do with this. This is not, but it, in my yard, I don't care. I'll store this motorcycle in that band for you for $10.99 a month. You got old tires. They charge you $3 for that old tire. You can rent a truck, you can store a car.

39:10 You don't care. Bring it on down here. You ain't got to put that old tire for $3 for less than that. Hell for you. For $3, they gonna charge you? I do it down here for $1.50. Down here in Jones, big ass truck rental and storage facility. Now, friends, you may ask yourself, "Hi, man. Hell, can he store this stuff for such a cheap price?" This in a box, market for you, put it in a way, steal it. The fact that it matters, I'm pretty drunk right now and store it. And this is a drunk discount sale down here at Jones, big ass truck rental and car facility. You got an elephant. I got space. Send me smoke sickness. You got weed and I store anything you want.

39:51 Go ahead and give me a call. A five million minute net set. This is a bus. It's the onion radio news. God is diagnosed with bipolar disorder. This is Doyle Redland reporting. After a diagnosis that explains the confusing and contradictory aspects of the cosmos, the Lord God, creator of the universe and popular long time deity to billions of followers, was found to suffer from bipolar disorder today. Revind dr. J. Henry Jurgens. Sadly he's not in control of his actions, but he is in control of ours.

40:34 Jurgens plans to form a support group, living with a bipolar creator deity as a forum for all of humanity to discuss their feelings about living in a universe run by an omnipresent loved one, not fully in control of his emotions. Doyle Redland for the onion radio news online at the onion dot com. Welcome back to the dad's home podcast episode number three zero seven still to come. We will find out who delivered to us the parenting tweeted the week. Very kind of them to do that gives us enough to chuckle a laugh about here.

41:17 That's on the way here, plus just in the adrenaline fueled. Worst parent of the year nominee possibly we've got three of them to choose from. That's all on the way here the dad's home podcast. All right, Chad. So first Gen Z, they think that we're old. We are old. I can't really argue with them about that. I can't argue with my child about that because she's right. But what is it that they think is old, but still really like? That's the question here. What is it? It's like, Hey, that's an older person thing. And I kind of dig it. There's a couple of different ones. Buzzfeed has put out an article here saying recently I asked the Gen Z members of our Buzzfeed community.

41:57 What things they appreciate or love about older generations. Here are some of their responses. Are you ready for this? Now, do you want to make any predictions ahead of time here? So what you think Gen Z thinks is cool. I'm going to stick with the house phone, the wall phone, okay, rotary dial phone, some sort of phone is not a device. Is it exclusive rotary dial or are you pulling yourself out of the 70s and doing the push button? One that were on the because those were the cool. I have my mom still have a rotary one, which is I believe I could be wrong hardwired into her house. They used to be.

42:38 I don't know. You had to have a guy that come out to do it. There's no, there's no jack. There's no like ethernet plug. You plug in for the, I mean, they eventually got to that point. Yeah, but you are coming out of the wall. It was hardwired in. It was soft and someplace into your wall. So, okay. So you're saying the phone with the phone. The phone is on the list. Any old technology we talked about are Tari. So Tari tape decks, record players, record players, that kind of stuff. Boombox stuff. There may be a boombox in there. Well, you, you might be shocked at this because again, let's all just remember for those of us who are old enough to the coolest thing about the boombox was when you got the one that did the reverse cassette.

43:22 So you pop the cassette and you play the one side automatically. You weren't forced anymore to hit the eject button. Pull the cassette out, turned it over, put it back in and hit the play button for side too. It flipped over for you. Very, very nice. Oh, before you had it. It was extra. Before you had the removable CD player in your car or the removable CD player in your car, which was by the way, the coolest. That was the coolest thing. If you had a tape deck that you could pop a cassette into your car and not have to worry about ejecting it or flipping it over when it was done, it flipped over for you. That was the best. That was the coolest thing. So I get, you might be shocked.

44:05 You might be shocked at the first couple of ones here. Because they're more ethereal. They're more like, here we are. Feeling? Yeah. Here we go. Oh, just from a Gen Zier. I like with older generations that they're able to keep up conversations with each other and create real connections without a screen between them. Some Gen Ziers do it too, but don't get me wrong. But the amount of people unable to strike up a conversation and keep it interesting to say the least. So just the ability to have conversation is which is kind of lost in this generation. I would say that is true.

44:45 Yeah, if we didn't make our kids put the phone down and sit down to the dinner table, everybody be at the dinner table like that, you know, put the phone. So I get it. You go to a restaurant these days too. You look around and there's tables full of people. Everybody's looking at their phone. Yeah. It is nice to have a conversation now then. And even take it a little deeper. I mean, sometimes the conversation is about whatever you saw on the phone or whatever you saw in you. It can be absolutely, but man's talking about it. Yeah, have a face to face. There's a social aspect all that too. What is happening there? Are we all becoming introverts because of the phone? Right.

45:25 Because that's something like, you don't know how to be human in the real world. I think that's what they're saying with this is like, okay, so once you get beyond the surface conversation, like, yeah, I saw that too. Or that really that they had that on the Instagram. That's awesome. That's funny. That's crazy to put that up there. Then there's just nothing except awkward silence, like keeping the conversation going, developing from that, being an active listener and a participant in the conversation is something that's important to have. And I think that that's one of the things that they're saying here is that they feel like they are unskilled in that because if there's no screen between them, there's no way that conversation keeps going. It's sad to think about, but at the same time, okay, all right, so maybe we're the last generation who can have conversations that last or that trail into another conversation.

46:13 Although I will say this, do you feel this way with your kids? I feel like I've brought my girls up correctly, in my opinion, correctly enough to when they're talking to older adults that they can keep that conversation going. It's not, it's not their favorite. They would rather find a way to go like, oh, I got a thing. I got to head out of here, but they can have a, like my, my kid in having interest from colleges recruiting her for softball. She can have a good conversation where I can be off to the side, not even in the same room. And she can have that conversation with coaches or athletic directors or whoever it is.

46:53 And I can feel confident about that. But at the same time, like if her and her favorite catcher from her softball team when I'm not to talk, oh, well, I can't imagine what that conversation would be like. Because it would be very. Yeah, crickets. Yes, crickets. Crickets. I, I, with your point about your kids, too, that is one of my favorite things is when another adult will come up to me out of the balloon cup, oh, your daughter is so great. I had a great conversation with her the other day. And you're like, wait, are we talking about the same kid? You're right. There's something that makes you feel so proud about that. It does. Absolutely does. Yeah. Because you know, the opposite was true. You'd be so worried.

47:34 Like, um, I went and talked to your daughter. What's wrong with her? You're thinking to yourself, wait a minute. Is she a psychopath? He's so, yeah. Um, um, but no, seriously, like my, my kids, um, the, all three of them can do that. All three of them. That's great. I've been a couple met at various times. So yeah, yeah. And like, I know my 10 year old can do that. And I know my 10 year old can walk up to a counter at a restaurant or a coffee shop and ice cream place and order what she wants. No problem. She can do that and she can do it with great voice and make sure it's correct. You should be happy to go back and be like, you messed my order up. Thank you. 90% of the time she doesn't want to.

48:14 So she would have one of us order for her at the diner or whatever, but I know she's capable of doing it. And I've seen her do it. So I feel good about that. I think it's just a little thing that she's in right now. And she's more than capable of doing that. Here's this one. The thing I'm most jealous about is that older generations got to grow up with third places to meet and hang out in. There's nothing like that anymore. If we go to a coffee shop, it's $10 cups of coffee and we're expected to drink it quietly and leave. And if we want to go hang out in the park, there are always Karen yelling at us for just being kids. It's like there's a constant helicopter of surveillance and anger towards teenagers. It's just completely kept us from having that kind of experience you got.

48:56 And I think that's probably pretty true. It's, some of that to me is the, the, the, when we grew up, we were unsupervised children. Like, my parents were like, yeah, go play in the woods. Like you get attacked by a bear? Great. Just be back before the sun goes down kind of thing, you know, I believe they call it like the kids, right? We were like, watch key or, yeah, or the street light kids. Yes. Right. And so there's a capability there and a trust that our parents had and, and that seems lacking and it's this sort of like urgency to make sure that our kids are okay to like, you know, be their bulldozer, their helicopter, whatever, to make sure everything's okay.

49:41 And then, and then people see other kids acting up and having fun. And then they feel like, you know, oh my God, I, somebody's going to hurt themselves or whatever their logic is. I, and don't you feel like that's odd too? Like we, when we grew up, yes, we were right. We should just be like, I, I look at those cool kids. And our parents would be like, okay, make sure you home by the time the street lights come on, right? You're going to do whatever you're going to do. I don't give a fuck go out there and whatever it is that you're going to do, go do it. But just be back before the street lights come on or as the street lights are coming on. But at that time, that's when legitimately creepy dudes were pulling up in parks or, you know, they were pulling up in your neighborhood with the windowless vans offering you candy out of the back of it.

50:23 And yet our power, just be home for the lights come back on. Where did you, where did you grow up again? Because those guys were not in my neighborhood. But here we are. Here we are with our kids like, I don't, I don't know if I can just let her go to the park. I don't know if that's okay. I think that's not better. I know it's just right around the corner, but I better driver. I got to drive her over there. I don't know the chances are, I mean, all the times that I've taken her to the park, I've never seen a windowless van pull up, but because as a kid, I always heard that, but my parents didn't give a shit about it. They weren't worried enough about it to be an issue. That's when actual kids were getting kidnapped was back in that time frame. Now we're just like, I don't, I don't have any reason to be concerned, but I'm going to be concerned.

51:06 Right. Yeah. It's parents let your kids go feral every now and then. It's hard advice. It's good for them. It's good for you. Yeah, I'm so dirty. You'll be fine. Yeah. Come on now. Let them eat weird things. It doesn't matter. They'll develop, you know, they'll, they'll, they'll, they're going to grow into all that means within reason, let them eat weird things. I wouldn't have the windowless van guy pull up and then they got to eat whatever he's selling. Don't give the, yeah, selling. Yeah. Okay. The toys. To be honest, I always thought the beanie babies were cool even though they were never worth anything. But the kids actually, I feel like my, my 17 year old will bring up things that she remembers as being cool toys of her time.

51:50 And I'm like, that wasn't that long ago and then I had to think back, shit, that was 15 years ago. Okay. That does, that was quite a while ago. Like I told you I got her the guitar hero. I got the weed. Yeah. And the weed, like the original we, I bought the original guitar hero, World Tour that came where we had with it when she was little and played it and she's playing it since Christmas nonstop and absolutely loves it. So the toys that she remembers from that I think are worth it and the stuff I grew up like I have because it's, I'm stupid this way, Chad. But one of my things that I collect is that I've got, do you remember when I was growing up, I had the Mattel Electronics handheld LED video games like they had.

52:30 Yes. All football, football, baseball hockey. And it's just the stupidest thing you put a nine volt battery in the back and the way you checked to see if the battery was good. Open it, put it on your tongue. Did you shock your tongue? Fuck yeah. Everton. Let's do this. Yeah, you can go. We got to choose. Let's go. You want to be player one or player two? Right. Exactly. We're going to play pro or we're going to play amateur level. Let's get on this shit. And so that would be, I have a collection of those and my daughter enjoys still like the baseball one. She loves, which was my favorite one. And she loves playing that. It's just a little LED game. There's no characters. There's no avatars that you can create. It's a fucking red dot that bleeps.

53:10 And it's three sounds if you get a triple two sounds if you get a double and that's how you know what you've got. And it is still to this day that one of the things she thinks is most fun. That's awesome. Yeah. I don't have, I don't really feel like toy wise that's around any of you have. But lately, and figures? No, no, but lately my kids have been asking me about things that I played with in the past. Like, Dad, did you ever have X? Whatever it was? Yeah. Yeah, and there's some of those toys, man. I wish I still had them to this day because I see these guys online that have all this collectible toys and shit, especially the Star Wars stuff.

53:53 And it's like, dang, I had one of those. I played one of those when I was a kid. But yeah, it's I had my personality. That our kids don't have my grandma's having caught me the boba Fett, the boba Fett action figure that actually shot out the rocket from the back. Yes. Before they held it out that. Yeah, because they were killed with joke on it and all that. Yeah. They recalled it. My grandmother took it back and I didn't end up getting it. I think I ended up getting like a she got me a jaw wall or something like that. Yeah. The next action character. But anyways, I remember getting that. And I had all the Star Wars action figures. Man, and I love those things.

54:34 Those were amazing. I grew up with all of that kind of stuff. My mom would call it my boy Barbie dolls because I had Superman and Batman. And I had all the superhero characters. Geo Joe's. Again. With all of that also for us, you know, at a time when I was growing up, it was also collectibles that you had. So we would go down to the guy at the mall by my house who had a baseball card store, right? He had all his baseball cards there and all the other types of cards he had football and basketball and all that stuff. And then he also had collectibles of like all these cool Star Wars action figures and toys. It was the coolest place to go hang out, gum ball machines. He had a pinball machine in there. And it was just a collectible guy.

55:14 That's where we would go and hang out. We wouldn't get kicked out. We were like, they he loved it if we were all hanging out in there and talking boards and baseball and whatnot. Did he drive a windalous van money chance? He did off for a lot of rides home. That's the East County is being. No, I just I just so I just I think that the combination there and that that I could see where the kids would miss that I miss that now as an adult as well. Here it is, Chad number five on the list. I loved the wall phone the most. It was my favorite thing in my grandparents house. Oh, geez. Now when it hits that's that that hits below the belt.

55:55 Now my grandparents house. I will say that my kids have have sort of a shoot any and all stories about wired phones and how we you know back in our day, Chad, if you wanted to have a private conversation on the home phone line, that meant you'd have to have the long extension cord to the wall phone so you could go out into the garage, close the door so your parents couldn't hear you talking on the phone. And that's where you'd kind of like huddle up off to the side and have a conversation with the girl you wanted to talk to or your bros if you were talking about ever. But mom could still go pick up the other phone in the other room and hear exactly what was going on your conversation.

56:36 So in this case, they've they've like, it's not a big deal. You had to there was a rotor. What is a what is that? What did you have to do that or what was that all about? Yeah, looking up on YouTube kids. Yeah. But I will say that for some reason and I think it's probably more likely the television shows like the sign felt where in the 90s you had the phone that had the extendable antenna that didn't get the exception, but it's a big phone that had the had to pull the antenna. Yeah, cordless. Yeah, cordless phones. And that's they seem to find interest in that a little bit like that kind of thing. And technology though, like, what is that all about? They're like, Oh, but that's like, yeah, that you don't want to hear about the corded one.

57:18 Yeah, 1980s, the first cordless phones and answering machines. You don't understand if you messed up the number on the rotary phone and you were six digits into it, you had to hang up and start over, maybe. Yeah, do not mess up. All right. So, but anyways, you were right. I think that that is pretty huge. Now, one of the things I will say to him will wrap this up here. Two things. And you and I have talked at nauseam about this. Their music taste says one of these Gen Z years. My dad is a Gen Xer. He's the reason I got to see Iron Maiden live in 2023. My mom is a boomer. She got me into Dolly Pardon, Johnny Cash, Kenny Rogers and Elvis. My sister is a millennial and she's taken me to see bands like Green Day, my chemical romance, bowling for soup less than Jake and some 41.

58:02 Their music taste helped me shape my music taste and I have to give credit words, do they did a pretty good job. Yeah, so our pop culture was better. Our music was better. That's not to say that the musicians of today are talented. Right. I mean, you know, I dig me some Beyonce, don't get me wrong. Right. Her music, just her music. And that's like, would you ask my kids? They think, Dad, you listen to Beyonce, what? But my kids also listen to stuff from the 80s and the 70s and you know, I've introduced them to things like Uncle Boingo and it's so, yeah.

58:44 And yeah, pop culture. I mean, the movie is back then. Charlie keeps bringing up the time that you and Kate drove her to a softball game and you guys got a beastie boys and that you were so shocked that she knew who the beastie boys were. Yes. Her generation normally doesn't. I was like, right. Yeah. I felt like a, I felt like a dick though because I was like, do you know who? Do you know the beastie boys are and the for the back seat is like, of course I know the beastie boys are. I'm like, dang it. Because generally that generation is wearing a run. No, he's a shirt, but has no idea who he can see. Yeah. You couldn't name a song, right? Didn't know that they were actually black or, you know, that's, you know, you're like, do you know who Rev Ron is?

59:25 They're like, what? What are you talking about? Bless you. Talking about. Yeah. So anyways, I think, I think the music that we've brought, because also for us, it was, it wasn't as, I mean, she's, you had to wait for a record to come out. You had to wait at a record store. You had to, the people waited. It was like a live event to have something released to see the world premiere on MTV for a video. It was a thing. It wasn't just, you know, sit, a, sit around and wait for it. It was a thing you had to be there for. And we, we sound old. Right. You have to put this into the old man tip jar again. Yeah. That's your right.

1:00:05 Before I go to, I'll stop it at that. This is one that my daughter, my 17 year old daughter realized and then got a gift for my wife for Christmas that was, and she, they love cooking together. So recipes and cookbooks. Oh, yeah. And having the, so, so what my, my daughter did was bought my wife like this, it's a new digitally. So you have a digital copy of your cookbook and the recipes that you've got. And then, which is pretty cool too. So that, and I think that that was selfishly, I think that was my daughter's way of saying, I'm just going to get a copy of whatever's on the digital side. So I've got it to be able to make all those things that I love that mom makes.

1:00:49 But that's, this is the cool thing too is that some of the things that Kim makes as the Italian that she is end up without an actual recipe per se. Just kind of a, if it's a pinch of this and a dash that, yeah, yeah. So that's where together. They're going to come up with what some of these recipes are and then put them into the book together, which I think is kind of a cool thing. I mean, for what it's worth now, you go to get a recipe now online. You search your phone for it. You got a scroll for like five minutes of just dissertation about how they came up with this or the history of the peanut butter cooking. You're like, fuck, just give me the recipe already. And I don't need 1500 ads in between the top of the page and where that is doing.

1:01:32 I don't eat any of that. So I do kind of, I think there's something about having a good, you know, Betty Crocker cookbook or if there's a specialty like a pasta cookbook or if there's a, like I one of the ones that I have that my wife got from years ago was I was really on this big fajita kick where I wanted to make all these fajitas at the home and homemade tortillas. And so it's got all of that in one particular cookbook. So I think those, I kind of enjoy having them. I would miss them if they weren't there. And I think my daughter's what as well. Hey, man. Yeah. All right. Again, if there's anything else you think we're missing out on, please let us know. Reach out radio.com. Reach out and we can touch us. What?

1:02:12 Reach out and touch us. Not in a window, Liz van. Stay away from that in the park, my friends. Staying away from that in the park. All right. We get onward to the categories or the three in the category of tweets of the week when it comes to parenting tweets here, the dad's own podcast. Throw down Twitter, Twitter, Twitter, Twitter, Twitter, Twitter, Twitter, Twitter, Twitter, Twitter, Twitter, Twitter, Twitter, Nice, Twitter. All right. Here we go. Number one in the category. This one, you sent to me chat. I made up a story from my daughter at bedtime about a friendly elephant and how he was nice to everyone. I was in the hyenas who were mean to him, but then I got scared and was I was teaching her not to stand up for herself.

1:02:56 So I ended the story with him killing all the hyenas. I mean, I said it to you. I still laugh. That's awesome. It is still it is fantastic. I mean, that is a very top notch tweet right there, very top notch. And again, the creativity that goes into and then the elephant kills all the hyenas. Like just end it right there and say, good night, honey. We'll talk tomorrow. Sweet dreams. No, he squashed him. He threw one, he picked one up with a trunk and tossed it across the jungle. Yeah. And then they almost started to run and then he stamped on him and he stopped on the one and then he just swung his big foot at the other one and knocked that one clear into the lake. And that's how he killed all the hyenas.

1:03:37 It was fucking hyenas. All right. Good night, honey. There's a sleep tight. All right. Here we go. Read number two, my son just asked me if he has to wear a shirt to Taco Bell and honestly, I don't know. I don't know either. If you guys know out there, reach out, tell us speaking from experience. Yeah. I'd say it's not required. Oh, okay. It is it has been frowned upon mainly because of my man boobs, but it has been frowned upon that I was in a Taco Bell shirt list, but I can say is I got served.

1:04:19 So I don't I think if the answer is do you have to wear the it's not like the the the old school fast times rich money, no shirt, no shoes, no service. That not a Taco Bell. They don't believe in that. So I was able to get service. All right. Tells you a lot. So anybody knows you're clear. Last one. Me if there was a fire, who would you say first me or Jack O my 10 year old son, probably Jack O Jack O is his imaginary dog. Oh my God. Very truthful. It's very truthful. I know you got it. You got to appreciate the honesty of kids. I appreciate. Look, the honesty of kids, if you ever want to know if you're fat, let a kid put posted notes on you.

1:05:08 They will find the fattest parts of your body like a fucking plastic surgeon just picking out what needs to be lipos sucked and and they will they will fucking put those posted notes. You have neon pink posted notes on the love handles that you wish you could hide and you thought you were hiding, but they found them. That's that's beautiful. That's the kind of honesty. One of you want to honest you want to honest look at yourself ask your ask a kid, ask a toddler to draw a picture of you. See what the fuck you get. See what I trust. No, don't. That's a bad idea. Seriously, just do it. Just ask or better yet if you don't want to if you don't want to make it about you.

1:05:51 Hey, why don't you draw picture, Mommy? Why don't you draw picture? Why don't you draw a picture of Nana? Just fucking son Nana or somebody else, whatever Nana, Nana or Mommy, one of them just and then let me see it. Don't show them. Just bring it to me. I will, I will. And we know it. We'll forget about it. Once you finished it, we won't even say anything to anybody about it. It never happened. It never happened. You know what? You just leave it in the mailbox. I'll get it later. You can forget about it once it's in the mailbox. I'll pick it up. You don't even have to do a thing. So the kid said he would in a fire, he would save the imaginary dog before his dad. Oh Jesus. See, I think you guys.

1:06:33 Hands out to you. Yeah. I think that if the imaginary dog is as much as I like the first one, this one is fucking fantastic. I don't know. It's hard. It's a cute, we can't pick the one I put in there. That can't be two weeks in a row. Boy, you could. It absolutely could. I like the elephant story. I also like the imaginary dog. Just because I feel like that could happen to me in a moment's notice. And I feel like I could still have him with my 10 year old right now. And again, his 10 year old said, "Jacko." It could happen with me in my 10 year old right at this moment. Please tonight, when you're going to bed, tell worry about the elephant then ask your should save in a fire and tell me what she says because both of those things I want to know how that goes.

1:07:21 You got it. I will do that. All right. So I'm going with the Jacko, the imaginary dog. Are you with me? All right. Jacko winner. Jacko is our winner for the tweet of the week, parenting tweet of the week. All right. It is going to be an adrenaline fueled, if you will, version of the worst parent of the year for 2025. The bracket is almost a pause. We're dangerously close now. The march. Yeah. We are right there. It's right around the corner. When we come back, we'll find out who the latest parent will be next year at the Dad's home podcast.

1:08:09 A man was born in a small farm town in France on May 19, 1946. Andre Rusemoff came out of the womb as a full grown man. That might be a bit of exaggeration. By age of 18, he was indeed over seven feet tall and weighed over 300 pounds. Soon he became one of the most intimidating fighters of our time. Eventually, he got up to seven foot five, 500 pounds. If you saw him on the street today, you would be shocked because he's no longer alive. But he was a true man. He never would have fit into girly-landered pants or a fuzzy little scarf with cute patterns on it. He used scars for tube socks and pool covers as condoms. Andre, the giant only lost matches when he felt like losing. He only talked to people he felt like talking to.

1:08:51 And he never, ever ordered his latte with soy milk. Here's to you, giants. You know Metro sexual. When you used the word "metro," you were talking about the subway. And you were on the subway because you couldn't fit in a car. This has been Leacamp for more funny crap. Check out Leacamp.net and sharkbaby.com. Why this is a clay-and-sliced cock shot? You're going to be feeling wonderful all day because you're going to be taking shots at Cox left and right like a pro. Now here's a guy, one shot to the cock, myotestical damage, two shots, destroyed cock in seconds. Now watch this. You're going to add in some garlic, okay? Here we go. I'm going to put some garlic in. All right. And you keep going. You completely pull apart that cock.

1:09:32 I mean, it's gone. And you got a piece of garlic mashed to a dick. Now, you loved tapping guys in the nuts, but you don't like touching balls with your hands. You know you don't like guyberries anywhere in your fingers. That's why you wear gloves in the public restroom. One shot. Cock salad. Now look, I love a good ball punch as much as the next guy, but once in a while you really got to send a message to make sure they don't forget. This is going to change the way you punch sticks, big dicks, little dicks, crooked dicks, five seconds, four or five seconds, the guy's on the ground, you really hurt his branch. See? This nut shot is boring. Stop having a boring nut shot. Stop having a boring line. Cock shot these two guys here. Voila. It's a miracle. Congratulations. Yada, yada, yada. Now here's a hardball day.

1:10:12 It's kind of like a testicle. Look at that. Unrecognizable. Now add a cornish on for the dick and here we go. Don't have time to screw up your balls. Now you do. So here's the deal, kids. You buy the cock shot and you're going to get the cronelman for gravy, brown gravy, white gravy inside the modifier. Ignite the salt and watch this hot dog, box side, Dave Matthews bands, sex with a horse. It's so easy. If I can cock shot someone with one finger, you can do it with your whole hand. I mean blast somebody's dick out the back of their jeans. Can do it. I'm talking serious dick damage. Guys, we're going to make America's meat bananas hurt one cock shot at a time. I just slap a cock, wash it and put it away. It's a very quick dick punch.

1:10:53 It's a real time saver. It's so easy. It's just like bam, bam, bam, bam. My boyfriend gets so winded. The cock shot sells for $4.95. But if you call on March 21, 2018, you're going to get the cronelman free plus nine Jesus cards. Here's how to order. Your cock shot plus free cronelman in Jesus cards just out 1-800-Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. Back to the dad's home podcast, but first, more dad jokes. We come from Nashville and me and my wife, we were in Nashville last summer, and we went out on the lake with some of our friends, and we were like floating around the water and there was a guy in a boat like right next to us and my wife was like, "Oh, that's my ex-boyfriend" and that boat. Now, I didn't know who he was, so she never said that at all, you know.

1:11:37 He was basically like, "You have him fun because I like to put a stop to that." And make you stare at this guy the rest of the day. So I'm like, "Stare an Adam." And then I look at my wife and she's staring at him. And I feel like she's staring at him to see what her life would be like if she didn't marry me. So I started staring at him because it's like, "I almost seemed like my life would be like, if I didn't marry her." You know? And we were putting so much pressure on this guy. We stared at him for a while, he did nothing exciting at all. And you know, we looked back at each other and just realized, you know what? We don't have a boat. That's the only difference.

1:12:17 My friends, my friends were like, "You should have went and tried to fight them. Why don't you go fight them?" And I was like, "Well, I would have had to swim over to that fight." So I don't know how intimidating that is for a guy to see a head in a life jacket floating his way. And then I get to get in the boat, you know? Like, if you ever try to climb into a boat from water, it's not aggressive. It takes an hour if no one is in the boat. Like, if he's in there, I'm never going to get in. I would need his help. I would like, "Could you help me into this boat?" I can't tell you why, but I really need in this boat.

1:13:00 Nate Bargazzi here on the Dad's Home Podcast. All right. We've got one, two, three that I can count here, Chad. Three entries into the worst pair of 2025 that we have to choose from here tonight. We got to make this selection. It's not going to be easy. I understand that. But I try to make it a little easier in that the first one that we're going to look at is just a picture. It's not going to be a video. So I think automatically that puts us at, it puts them at a disadvantage if they were really hoping to get into this thing. But I think it's a powerful picture. As we look here at the picture of, it looks weird because there's gators in the water here.

1:13:42 There's a gator underneath here. And right up above where you can stand in the walkway and look over the gators, Dad has the sun sitting on the fence about ready to possibly fall over into the gator pit. I don't know if it's feeding time right now, but it's really, is there any time that's not a feeding time for gators? Honestly, I think I've taken the time. Yeah. Yeah. So he's got him. There's definitely some poor decision making going on here for sure. Absolutely. Absolutely. 100% some very poor. And again, knowledge by the father, I don't think he walked into this place going, I bet you there are no gators there. We fine. I'll just put them up here in the, and there's a big sign over to the side. I'm talking about the challenge.

1:14:24 Yeah, we walked in and there's a big sign on the outside of the building said gators in here. Right. I thought it was okay. I think it's places just called gatorville. Like I think that's what it is. And they're like, why not put the kid up on the fence? What could go wrong? Why not? No, I could possibly go wrong. Right. So I don't know how the case played out. I don't know how that ended, but I'm going to say a pretty bad decision making from father there. Again, this is number two. This is the segment where we judge other parents. Yes. All this is about. All right, number two is a video you're going to want to watch closely on this one. It's a birthday gift apparently. Right now you can't really tell because the dad's starting up a little motorcycle for the kid.

1:15:04 And this is a little kid getting on the motorcycle now. Now you'll see as the kid takes off on the motor. Three. He's a good, good party. And wait for the end. It's the end. It's probably the best part. Here he goes. Got these people right there, right there, right there. Oh, where do you go? Oh, oh. That was the fence. He's running across the lawn. Dad got the kid started on the lawn just fine. Once again, just fine. Got him all refbed up and ready to go. Gets the kid on there. Chosen where the throttle is. Now, luckily dad did put the helmet on the boy. Yeah, so there's that.

1:15:46 And shoulder pads. And set the kid off for the last one right into the fence. I mean, I want to see the third one before I really comment hard on the one. Evil, con evil, seemingly all right after that. But again, we don't know because somebody who is filming watched the kid go full speed into the fence. I can't film it. And then didn't move. What's the kid went through the fence? Can't film it. Can't film it. There was no trying to stop. There was just smash and keep filming. All right.

1:16:27 I'm going to give you the last one here, which, okay, I won't even tell you what, it's a very questionable survival instincts on the kid alone, but it's the parents that I'm questioning what they've done here. When you take your kid to the zoo, we always know things could go wrong. We had crocodiles earlier. In this case, it was a giraffe. And the young man's holding on, oh, dear God, wow, oh, giraffes picking them up, swinging them around. That's a very strong leaf and branch, by the way. I don't know how old that kid is. Yeah. Let's watch this again. So this kid, uh, mom and dad, I'm guessing, uh, Uncle whoever is there helping him as he is feeding a leaf, a palm leaf to a giraffe.

1:17:07 And oh, dear God, the giraffe will start to pick up the leaf and pull the boy with him because he doesn't let go. Nobody's telling him to let go. Let's say at the end, when they've already got him down, hanging, he was fully hanging in the air as the giraffe was pulling up the palm leaf. Mom and dad are trying to pull him down by his legs. Um, it's like we're handed giant, uh, you know, 200, um, helium balloons to your child and then off they go, because they're hanging onto the helium balloon. That's what this is. There are helium balloons hanging them off trying to grab him. He's still not letting go.

1:17:48 Nobody said to go or let go or I, I don't go to a petting zoo with goats without telling my daughters to keep their hand flat when they're feeding the goats. Like if you, yeah, you're going to lose a finger otherwise. Right. Yeah. So I go on a limb here too and say that maybe did they go on an olem. Let's see. Nice, right? Nice. Um, this also does not look like, um, this is an official like petting slash feeding the animal zoo. Like it looks a little bit like a safariish kind of. I don't know. I don't know what it is. It's weird because maybe it's just the zoo.

1:18:30 It just seems weird that these people would be able to walk up to the fence, hold the leaf up to a giraffe and have the giraffe eat out of their hand. And where does that happen? Ible land in Orlando. I think is where you can do that. I think they probably write by the arc. I don't know. I'm not sure. But I, yeah, it does kind of it begs the question, but there are, they are giraffes at this time. No, I'm just legit. But I'm mainly commenting on the, on the decision making of the parents. Like do they sort of sneak around some bear here to feed this animal or do they, so they got some leaves from somewhere? Oh, so they must have bought the leaf or something? Okay. Something.

1:19:10 Yeah, they're rip of off like this is, you know, the leaves actually part of the, you know, landscaping at the zoo and they ripped it off and they're like, hey, let's feed the animal. They, then those, and those palms seem strong enough to hold that child's weight. That's crazy. Maybe they were fake. Maybe they're, I don't know. I don't know. You wouldn't even try to fake fake. Just the whole thing feels like a very poor decision making across the board. But does it feel some one of the worst parents of 2025? Well, hmm, because again, I will remind you. Yeah, this one.

1:19:50 He puts his kid on with shoulder pads and helmet and he could, could, could, could, could, can barely fit on the motorcycle! So you're going to show your kid the throttle but you're not going to show where the brakes are? Right, the thing about This One 2 that makes me question this is, I mean the kid is like he's got the gear on, he's got a body arm, and an helmet, and no point is there any instruction from the dad, like okay turn, brake, anything, right?

1:20:36 Just go straight. So how much of this is dad knows that this is going to happen and this is hoping for this, like to get on America's plane and have a video like that? I mean that makes him a pretty shitty parent, if you set your kid up, like, what film that? Set him up for that, I think that makes you a shittier parent if you set him up for that knowing that was going to happen. Like you guys been working it out. Let's show everybody at the party how you do your crazy motorcycle stuff. He's like pointing it, like almost like he's pointed it towards the fence too. It's not like, you know, go down the sidewalk or whatever, or, you know, sideways in the yard or, you know, is he going to hit a jump and like jump over the fence?

1:21:16 Because I knew, I realized he was going further than where I thought the house would be obviously. So he's alongside this side of the house, but then to crash the, without even a slight instruction, like, here's the break. If you get going too fast, you might want to use a break a little bit. Well, and I give the kid a lot of credit though for, for being an ex-gamer and not like jumping off before the wall. He's just like, Oh, yeah, brother. Oh my God. He was a 100 on that. He's like, if I bust my little four year old neck on this fucking thing, it's going to be on you, Dad. And I'm going to be a legend. I'll be a legend, Dad. Look, I can't stop this bike. As soon as this bike stops, I am going to be a legend. I am kickbatowski from the Disney Channel.

1:21:58 That is me. It's crashing through fences. Oh, Dad, this guy, this guy for in terms of bad decision making and I see, I'm going to go with, he set his son up to film this, which makes him a super shitty parent. All right. I'm saying this was a setup for the purpose of going viral. I'm filming and going viral. That's right. Yeah. So that makes him even use my kid as my, my prop, so to speak, to get, to get famous. All right, Hunter. Now, don't, whatever you do, don't use them breaks. This shows you where it was. Don't use them. Just use the gas pedal. Just the throttle and then you have right through the face.

1:22:39 Hey, Marjorie, Marjorie, you got that, right? You let that all film. You didn't chase after him, none did you? I want a steady camera on this one. Hey, Hunter, you got scars on your face? Happy birthday, then, kid. Wow. Hunter crashes through the fence and just, he just demolishes the fence there. Yeah, he definitely, he definitely gets plus 10 points for damage. Yeah, he sure does. At the point, you hear something, he say, oh my gosh, but the camera doesn't move.

1:23:20 Nobody goes chasing after a kid who's free in the wild on a motorcycle in the front lawn at age four. Well, and, yeah, and nobody's yelling at the kid. Stop, stop, right? The rawl just watching him like head to the fence. That's the other thing, too, or, and those two people standing there too, didn't like, you know, I'm not going to throw themselves, yeah, Hunter. Hunter, I know your interaction. You can't feel your left foot. You get scars all of your face, but the chicks in preschool are going to love it. Yeah. And you're going to get so many chicks from this. And Hunter, you don't know it now, but you're internet famous.

1:24:01 Hunter, you're going to make daddy jealous. You're going to get all the free method. Daddy was hoping to get from this, this here viral video. Oh, Jesus. Well, there you go. So that's our clear cut winner. That's who we're naming the winner then. Yep. All right, where's parent is indeed Hunter's dad setting Hunter up for complete failure, either by as chat points out here, trying to make a viral video and setting Hunter up for that like crashing through the fence or just being oblivious dad going, here's the yeah, I'll tell you about the break on less than the bridge. I mean, there was a good three seconds there between people yelling, hey, maybe this wasn't a good idea.

1:24:51 And then you could have been chasing after him, but no one did. Nobody even called the attention to the two people standing by the fence to turn around and go, maybe you could try to get him off that thing or stop him. None of that. Yeah. If you look at the woman, she doesn't move very much if at all. It's like she knows it's coming. Right. It's almost like there's an alert and look, they were, they just out admiring the fence. Just like, oh, this is a, that's the other thing too. Yeah, like, look at the way this all here. God. Snash. And then he's laughing. The guy who's right there, he was laughing on top of it. I think maybe you're right about the setup on that. Either way, look, it's fun. It is funny. Okay, if that happened in my house accidentally, yeah, I'd laugh.

1:25:34 A Drenel and Dad is officially entered into our 2025 worst parent of the year bracket, which we will be working on desperately here for the rest of the month before we head into March, where the madness will officially take over for the worst parent of 2025. On that note, Chad, God. Yeah. Thank you again for a fantastic dad's home podcast. And for those of you listening at home and keeping track of it, real guy radio. And that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this.

1:26:15 I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I'm going to be doing this. I know sometimes I'm out of control. You're the only reason to keep on standing.

1:26:59 You're the only reason to keep on standing. You're the only reason to keep on standing. You're the only reason to keep on standing. You're the only reason to keep on standing. You're the only reason to keep on standing. You're the only reason to keep on standing. You're the only reason to keep on standing. You're the only reason to keep on standing. You're the only reason to keep on standing. You're the only reason to keep on standing. You're the only reason to keep on standing. You're the only reason to keep on standing. You're the only reason to keep on standing. You're the only reason to keep on standing. You're the only reason to keep on standing. You're the only reason to keep on standing. (screaming)