Jill Warnecke: Grieving with Purpose and Joy

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Hey friends, welcome to the Her God Story podcast,

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where you will always hear a powerful story to

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encourage and inspire you in your walk with the

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Lord. You'll be so glad you tuned in today. I'm

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your host, Jodie Chiricosta, ministry leader at

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Somebody Cares America and International, author

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and traveler on this incredible journey with

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Jesus. You know, God cares deeply for the overlooked

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and the hurting among us, and he holds a special

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place in his heart for widows and orphans. over

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and over in Scripture, he calls us to look out

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for them. That's why Somebody Cares established

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the Widow and Orphan Fund. It's a company of

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women that joined together to make a meaningful

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difference in caring for the special needs of

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those who God has entrusted to the care of our

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ministry partners around the world. Just recently,

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the director of our Somebody Cares Caribbean

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chapter graduated to glory, but his precious

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widow is left facing overwhelming medical bills,

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funeral costs, and other financial expenses.

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far beyond what she could manage. But thanks

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to friends like you, we were able to step in

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and send funds to help ease the burden during

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this difficult time. In the midst of her grief,

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we've been a tangible expression of God's love,

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bringing her comfort and letting her know she's

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not walking this road alone. Would you pray about

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joining us on this mission? Your gift of any

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size makes a difference. Just visit hergodstory

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.org and click Help Now. And yes, we even accept

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cryptocurrency. The Book of Psalms is beautiful,

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isn't it? It brings comfort, hope, and shows

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us what it looks like to be completely authentic

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before God. When I find myself in a wilderness

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place or needing comfort, I usually end up back

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in the Psalms. Maybe you do too. But then there's

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the Book of Lamentations. Not a place I naturally

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turn to unless my Bible reading plan takes me

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there. And yet Lamentations is such a powerful

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guide for walking through deep struggle and grief

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and finding our way back to hope. You actually

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see this kind of heart cry sprinkled throughout

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scripture, though we may not always connect the

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dots, but God put them there for our help and

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for our good. As followers of Christ, we believe

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in God's sovereignty, but when suffering comes,

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let's be honest, that can feel confusing and

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even distressing. How do we reconcile those hard

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moments? Mark Rogop in his book, Dark Clouds,

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Deep Mercy, offers some helpful insight. He says,

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lament is how you live between the poles of a

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hard life and trusting in God's sovereignty.

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Lament is how we bring our sorrow to God. Without

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lament, we won't know how to process pain. He

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goes on to say, to lament is Christian. As we

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turn to God in prayer, lay out our complaints,

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ask boldly, and choose to trust. Of course, our

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natural desire is for pain and suffering to end

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quickly. And sometimes, God steps in with a sudden

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and miraculous breakthrough. But often, He chooses

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to work through our pain, building trust in Him

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and forming the character of Christ in us. I

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often think about that declaration in Philippians

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3, 10, and 11. The NIV says, I want to know Christ,

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yes, to know the power of His resurrection. That

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resonates deeply with me. But the passage continues,

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and participate in his sufferings, becoming like

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him in his death, and so somehow attaining to

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the resurrection from the dead. I love the idea

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of knowing God's power. Suffering? Not so much.

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Even though I know as Romans 5, 3 through 5 reminds

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us that suffering produces perseverance, character,

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and hope, and that hope does not disappoint.

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In this episode, you're gonna hear a story of

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deep pain and even deeper trust. I hope you'll

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lean in and listen. Even if you're not in a hard

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season right now, chances are you know someone

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who is. And this can help equip you to support

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them better. And if you are walking through a

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deep valley, my prayer is that the Holy Spirit

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will minister hope to you just as he has for

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my dear friend, Jill Warnocky. Jill and I go

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way back. We worked together years ago right

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after I finished college and while I was in grad

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school. She's been married to her husband Steve

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for over 35 years and together they have raised

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four sons, even homeschooling them for a season.

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Jill serves faithfully in her church and carries

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a deep well of joy and wisdom. Welcome, Jill.

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Thank you. Thanks for having me. Jill, you grew

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up Catholic and always prayed that God would

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let you into heaven, but It wasn't until college

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when you understood his plan of salvation. It's

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a fun story. Would you share what happened? Well,

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just going back to when I was young, probably

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seven, eight, nine, I would pray, you know, Lord,

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I know I'm not good enough. I want to go to heaven.

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Please don't let me go to hell. And so that was

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my prayer. But then as you grow up as a teenager,

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you kind of, you know, that was there in the

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back of my mind, but didn't. Pursue it like that

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as a teen and then when I went off to college

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I met my husband now Steve and through Kind of

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some rack. I think some miraculous things that

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the Lord did I had a petri tape that a friend

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had given me before I went to college and I was

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not walking obviously I wasn't a Christian yet

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and but I told my friend that I had made it college

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that I had a petri tape and it was so funny because

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I have no idea why I would have told her that

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but it just came out like okay and then we happened

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to be on a date she was a friend of mine or with

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Steve actually and then I was with my boyfriend

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at the time and we're in the car and he pops

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in a Petra tape and she turns around and she

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goes, Jill, you have that. Yeah. And for those

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who don't know, Petra is a, was a Christian band

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back in, you know, back in the day. So just for

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younger listeners who may not know who Petra

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was, they're not going to know. I mean, that

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was Petey's Christian rock band. Yeah. Anyway,

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his, his antennas went up and thought, Either

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she's really backslidden or she's seeking the

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Lord. She's not saved so, you know Fast forward,

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you know, he's reaching out to me I finally accepted

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invitation to his uncle's house who was his pastor

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and we had dinner on Sunday evening and he just

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opened the Bible and it was just everything I

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you know, the Holy Spirit was so overwhelming,

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you know, and I got saved and received my prayer

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language all in one. So it was quite the experience

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and I thought to myself, wow, this is amazing.

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My life is forever changed. Yeah. Yeah. And after

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that decision, things did start changing pretty

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quickly. Oh, quickly, yes. Tell us about that

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season and what that looked like. You have all

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this passion and You know, you just want to save

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the world But you know not necessarily a lot

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of wisdom so I probably said things that were

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harsh and true, but yet Didn't wasn't received

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great But yet over time as I learned and as I

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learned how to communicate my faith in a more

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gracious loving way You know things started,

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you know moving along and I mean one one afternoon

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we were Steve and I were watching TV. And we

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loved the 700 Club. I mean, here we are 20, 20,

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21 and the 700 Club, which was really the demographic

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for that would have been much older. And, but

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we liked it. And so he's just like, Hey, you

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know, what if we would you consider moving there?

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if we got engaged, and I'm like, yeah, sure.

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So by this time, you're dating Steve. Your friend

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is no longer dating him. Yeah. At that point,

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we're friends. Are we dating? I don't know. And

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because there was just a lot of upheaval the

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first couple of months of being a new Christian

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and kind of letting all my family know about

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that, not knowing what that is. Is it a cult?

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What is all this? So, yeah, we ended up getting

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engaged. That was in October. We got engaged

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in December, that Christmas. And then, you know,

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but before that, he was just like, hey, would

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you think about moving to Virginia Beach for

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me to go to school there? And I thought, well,

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yeah, I would. I'm all in. Yeah. That's pretty

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quick. I mean, this happened in quick. It was

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very quick. It was very quick. But we were engaged

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for a year and a half. And I don't know, you're

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excited. You think this is the one. Let's seal

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the deal here. We'll have a long engagement.

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That was more of our courtship, if you will.

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So, you know, there were things that we learned

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about each other, obviously, over that time.

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And I ended up renting a house. Well, renting

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it, not renting a room. with some neighbors of

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his. And so we were right across the street from

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each other. And then I got a job and I did finish

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that year of school, but I did not go back for

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my senior year. So I just decided to keep my

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job, work full time and save for our wedding.

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So, yeah. And then we just made the plans to

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move to Virginia Beach in August of... 1987.

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So we got married in June of 87 and we moved

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in August. You moved to Virginia and God started

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to teach you some powerful truths, things that

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really will become important later on. Share

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a little bit about that time and what he showed

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you. When we were in Wisconsin for that year

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and a half, it was more of a a prosperity gospel

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that we were taught and more of a, you know,

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your faith is all important. And if you don't

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have enough faith, perhaps bad things, you've

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let the door open for Satan to come kill, steal

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and destroy. Now I do. I mean, there are aspects

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of that that I would still hold on to. But I

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do. I feel like I've what I've learned, obviously,

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through, you know, the last 35, 38 years. his

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sovereignty is over all things. And so we were

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just learning how great God is, who God is. I

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felt like probably in the past we didn't know

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that and we were just really opening the whole

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Bible, the whole Council of God and really diving

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into just the attributes of God and how unchangeable

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he is, how immutable. you know, he is, how powerful

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he is. I guess how great he is and how much he

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loves us and how personal of a relationship it

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is with him and not being fearful and not, you

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know, if you do sin or if you do have a lack

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of faith that, oh my gosh, now I'm gonna get

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sick, something bad's gonna happen if I don't

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keep myself up. in a certain way before him.

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No, that's, I don't believe that to be true,

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so. Yeah, God's mercy is new every morning, isn't

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it? Every morning, yes. And really, you were

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far away from family too, so that was a time

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when you grew together as a couple. Yes, we had,

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exactly, had each other as a couple and had school.

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We were making friends. You know, one of the

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big blessings was eventually we got into a very

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good, we, church that just really taught us about

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who God was and his sovereignty and but still,

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you know believed in the gifts of the spirit

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and and praying and and evangelism and so it

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just really and we made very good friendships

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still friendships that we have today so a few

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years into your marriage you and Steve you started

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started a family and Life was wonderful and full

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But then there was an unexpected tragedy. Yes.

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Tell us what happened and how that impacted you.

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It was 1994. I, we had had two boys, you know,

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um, we had Aaron and Seth, uh, they were four

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and two. And then we were, you know, 30 weeks

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pregnant with at the time we didn't know, but

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our daughter, Allison. And so we were just driving

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and, um, You know, it was an accident and somebody

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had turned in front of us and it was a head -on

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collision. And at that point, you know, we didn't

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really know the severity of my injuries. But

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once I got to the hospital, they were doing an

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MRI and her heart stopped beating. And so they

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rushed me into an emergency C -section and she

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was born. And they did revive her. And so she

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did. You know Steve and some close friends were

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able to see her But she ended up passing away

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that evening The accident was like a noon and

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she passed away around eight o 'clock. I did

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not get to see her They brought her into me after

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she had passed. So Yeah, they had you know the

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emergency c -section and then they just needed

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to further explore any if I were had any other

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injuries. That's really tough to process. I can't

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imagine how deep your grief was. And on top of

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that, you had some people who were wrongfully

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accusing you of allowing it to happen. And how

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did you process that pain and keep your heart

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from really turning angry toward God? You know,

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but it be for the grace of God there go I. I

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was in some of that teaching and, you know, I

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could have been right there. with them, with

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someone else. So just to try to remain, well,

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they just don't know really, you know, what they're

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saying. And so to, you know, you know, if it

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came from a family member, which it didn't very

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much, but just a few that were just like, oh,

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I don't know, how did you let Satan in? And we

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would we would just say, you know, it really

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isn't Satan. Yeah, he comes to kill, steal, and

00:15:29.120 --> 00:15:32.340
destroy. I don't understand all of God's sovereignty.

00:15:32.679 --> 00:15:35.659
I don't understand how, you know, the total,

00:15:36.120 --> 00:15:38.759
if I did, I'd have the mind of God. I'd know

00:15:38.759 --> 00:15:41.240
all of his thoughts, and I don't. Basically,

00:15:41.379 --> 00:15:45.960
we just tried to respond kindly with grace, with

00:15:45.960 --> 00:15:48.500
the scripture, and just say, well, you know,

00:15:48.620 --> 00:15:52.960
this is what we believe in. We do believe God

00:15:52.960 --> 00:15:56.059
is in control of all things. And, you know, in

00:15:56.059 --> 00:16:01.779
Job, he sent Satan to sift him. And I don't understand

00:16:01.779 --> 00:16:04.820
all that, but it brought me comfort, not that

00:16:04.820 --> 00:16:09.200
I was in this alone. See, I think, you know,

00:16:09.360 --> 00:16:11.980
if you feel like you've made the mistake and

00:16:11.980 --> 00:16:15.220
God has then withdrawn His protection over you

00:16:15.220 --> 00:16:18.120
because you've allowed Satan in, you're alone.

00:16:18.559 --> 00:16:21.059
How do you get back? How do you get God back?

00:16:21.139 --> 00:16:23.620
Why would you, you know, I'll never leave you

00:16:23.620 --> 00:16:27.299
or forsake you. Um, and he, he knows it all.

00:16:28.059 --> 00:16:32.039
And to this day, I, you know, why is not on,

00:16:32.120 --> 00:16:36.059
you know, so this is 1994. So, you know, she's

00:16:36.059 --> 00:16:40.379
31. She would have been, I, at this point, I,

00:16:40.419 --> 00:16:45.919
my mind is, it's not so much why it's, it's looking

00:16:45.919 --> 00:16:48.679
forward to heaven and being with her. So. Yeah,

00:16:48.700 --> 00:16:51.820
and in your grief, you made some pretty wise

00:16:51.820 --> 00:16:57.500
decisions in your grief. You told me at one point

00:16:57.500 --> 00:17:00.039
you intentionally tried not to pull away from

00:17:00.039 --> 00:17:03.139
people, not to isolate yourself. Yes, correct.

00:17:03.360 --> 00:17:05.220
You know, even though you're in pain, it's so

00:17:05.220 --> 00:17:06.940
easy to do when you're in pain. You don't want

00:17:06.940 --> 00:17:10.259
anybody to poke any part of your pain. So you

00:17:10.259 --> 00:17:12.720
can tend to isolate, which I think was so wise,

00:17:12.720 --> 00:17:15.339
you know, that you intentionally let people be

00:17:15.339 --> 00:17:19.960
around you. What were some of those other things?

00:17:19.980 --> 00:17:23.180
Some wise, maybe some prematurely, but how did

00:17:23.180 --> 00:17:27.200
you get through that? I think that we needed

00:17:27.200 --> 00:17:30.400
to stay close to our fellowship at church and

00:17:30.400 --> 00:17:38.559
to continue to talk to people, go to Bible studies,

00:17:39.400 --> 00:17:46.769
be in the Word, talk about the pain. you know,

00:17:46.910 --> 00:17:50.410
very good friends to this day who still will

00:17:50.410 --> 00:17:54.730
text me or call me on her birthday and say, I'm

00:17:54.730 --> 00:17:56.930
thinking about you. You know, that's wonderful.

00:17:57.349 --> 00:18:03.950
It really is important. I mean, there is alone

00:18:03.950 --> 00:18:08.109
time too with the Lord. I think I grew leaps

00:18:08.109 --> 00:18:11.549
and bounds with that particular area, but then

00:18:11.549 --> 00:18:16.130
also and at times making myself because all of

00:18:16.130 --> 00:18:20.829
my friends were pregnant. I had four gals in

00:18:20.829 --> 00:18:25.289
our small group that were giving birth after

00:18:25.289 --> 00:18:30.869
that, you know, and so just, okay, you know,

00:18:31.029 --> 00:18:34.349
times you can be alone and you've got to pursue

00:18:34.349 --> 00:18:38.529
your friends and be in fellowship and have really

00:18:38.529 --> 00:18:41.009
good, I mean not just, I mean it's a fun fellowship

00:18:41.009 --> 00:18:43.410
too, but fellowship where you can actually share,

00:18:43.769 --> 00:18:49.680
I'm not doing well today. and have that be, I

00:18:49.680 --> 00:18:52.099
mean, because grief is with you forever. You

00:18:52.099 --> 00:18:55.279
just have to learn, you grow with the grief,

00:18:55.279 --> 00:18:59.559
if you will, you know, and so to not, and nobody

00:18:59.559 --> 00:19:01.779
ever did not say, well, you should be over it

00:19:01.779 --> 00:19:06.359
by now. No, it's gonna be, I'll never be over

00:19:06.359 --> 00:19:12.019
it, if you will, it's gonna change, but that

00:19:12.019 --> 00:19:19.640
grief becomes, somewhat of a companion. No, no,

00:19:20.099 --> 00:19:22.180
no, no, not to despair, because we grieve not

00:19:22.180 --> 00:19:27.420
without hope. I always felt like because of the

00:19:27.420 --> 00:19:31.440
prior teaching about who God is, I didn't grieve

00:19:31.440 --> 00:19:34.099
like those without hope. I had hope, even though

00:19:34.099 --> 00:19:37.119
the grief was severe. But not to despair. Not

00:19:37.119 --> 00:19:39.500
really. Yeah. So let's talk about that for a

00:19:39.500 --> 00:19:40.779
minute. When you were walking through this, there

00:19:40.779 --> 00:19:42.960
wasn't any books or resources really out there

00:19:42.960 --> 00:19:45.359
that talked about Lamenting. What is lamenting?

00:19:45.380 --> 00:19:47.460
I mean, if you go to other countries in the world,

00:19:47.579 --> 00:19:49.880
there are seasons where, you know, they're like

00:19:49.880 --> 00:19:52.319
for a week or a month. I mean, they just wail

00:19:52.319 --> 00:19:56.339
and lament. But there are a few resources now.

00:19:56.500 --> 00:19:58.680
I quoted one at the beginning of the podcast,

00:19:58.839 --> 00:20:01.640
but it's pretty new territory. So share what

00:20:01.640 --> 00:20:04.319
you what what lament look like for you when you

00:20:04.319 --> 00:20:06.039
did it and how God worked in your heart through

00:20:06.039 --> 00:20:11.960
that process. Wailing is a real release. I know

00:20:11.960 --> 00:20:16.920
it sounds. Unusual but we don't do that and and

00:20:16.920 --> 00:20:20.259
when you're going through that if you've lost

00:20:20.259 --> 00:20:24.200
That kind of grief you wailing. I mean I did

00:20:24.200 --> 00:20:29.140
when they brought her in to me I it was wailing

00:20:29.140 --> 00:20:34.380
and I it was groanings that I couldn't it had

00:20:34.380 --> 00:20:40.140
to come out because it was just so deep and So

00:20:40.140 --> 00:20:44.569
that I learned how to do that I learned how to

00:20:44.569 --> 00:20:47.930
lament. I just looked in the Psalms. I looked

00:20:47.930 --> 00:20:54.829
in, you know, Lamentations, and then I felt like

00:20:54.829 --> 00:21:00.410
the Lord was teaching me how to lament. And so

00:21:00.410 --> 00:21:04.269
in the Psalms and then also in Lamentations,

00:21:05.089 --> 00:21:09.609
the person who's lamenting is saying, you know,

00:21:09.789 --> 00:21:14.619
my soul is downcast I you know how long will

00:21:14.619 --> 00:21:19.940
this last all day all the day long and then I

00:21:19.940 --> 00:21:24.759
come back but you know my I will call this to

00:21:24.759 --> 00:21:27.279
mine and this is out of Lamentations and so this

00:21:27.279 --> 00:21:31.680
is what I used regardless of where I found the

00:21:31.680 --> 00:21:35.279
lament if it was in Lamentations or Psalms or

00:21:35.279 --> 00:21:38.950
Habakkuk Um, but this I will call to mind. So

00:21:38.950 --> 00:21:42.650
that's it. That's a willful act on my part. So

00:21:42.650 --> 00:21:45.029
I'm in my grief. I don't feel any different,

00:21:45.549 --> 00:21:48.130
but this I will call to mind. And so that's kind

00:21:48.130 --> 00:21:52.210
of where I lived. And, and then the second. And

00:21:52.210 --> 00:21:55.309
what did you call to mind? It says so, but this

00:21:55.309 --> 00:21:59.309
I call to mind and therefore I have hope. The

00:21:59.309 --> 00:22:02.569
steadfast love of the Lord never ceases. His

00:22:02.569 --> 00:22:05.890
mercies never come to an end. They are new every

00:22:05.890 --> 00:22:08.710
morning. Great is your faithfulness. The Lord

00:22:08.710 --> 00:22:12.970
is my portion, says my soul. Again, I'm speaking

00:22:12.970 --> 00:22:17.750
to my soul. Therefore, I will hope in him. I

00:22:17.750 --> 00:22:21.309
mean, and that's that was my food. And that was

00:22:21.309 --> 00:22:24.470
my meal daily moment. I mean, hour by hour, you

00:22:24.470 --> 00:22:27.869
know, basically, regardless of what I would read

00:22:27.869 --> 00:22:30.750
or what I would think. And that's a funny thing.

00:22:30.809 --> 00:22:34.109
So you're thinking things. Like, I can't do this.

00:22:34.150 --> 00:22:37.430
I can't. Like, this is just too much, Lord. You

00:22:37.430 --> 00:22:40.109
know, I don't understand all of these things

00:22:40.109 --> 00:22:43.720
you're thinking. And kind of going back to the

00:22:43.720 --> 00:22:46.440
the faith movement if you will if you you know

00:22:46.440 --> 00:22:49.220
you can't speak things if you speak things you

00:22:49.220 --> 00:22:52.240
know oh no if i say i'm sick oh i'm you know

00:22:52.240 --> 00:22:55.160
it's my lack of faith if i'm speaking certain

00:22:55.160 --> 00:22:58.160
things so i had to train myself to just speak

00:22:58.160 --> 00:23:00.720
these things to the lord i'm thinking them he

00:23:00.720 --> 00:23:03.119
already knows i'm thinking them what in the world

00:23:03.119 --> 00:23:05.539
they need to come out of my mouth as a lament

00:23:05.539 --> 00:23:08.579
to the lord not as a declaration about yourself

00:23:08.579 --> 00:23:11.390
but. Revealing your heart to God saying God this

00:23:11.390 --> 00:23:16.410
is where I'm at exactly and it was I am confused

00:23:16.410 --> 00:23:22.349
I Don't understand But it always you know and

00:23:22.349 --> 00:23:25.750
I could spend 20 minutes on the lament, but then

00:23:25.750 --> 00:23:29.630
as my heart was Actually it you know as my heart

00:23:29.630 --> 00:23:32.690
was softening not that it was hard, but there

00:23:32.690 --> 00:23:36.670
was a change There was a change after the lament

00:23:37.079 --> 00:23:42.279
Getting it out and God knows all things He knows

00:23:42.279 --> 00:23:47.220
my thoughts so the verbalization of it as a lament

00:23:47.220 --> 00:23:52.259
was very important in my healing I You know it

00:23:52.259 --> 00:23:57.200
it needed to be there and but and I knew that

00:23:57.200 --> 00:24:02.400
It always had to follow up with but you are You

00:24:02.400 --> 00:24:06.539
know you I have hope because of who you are and

00:24:06.539 --> 00:24:09.519
then just listing his character. You know, I

00:24:09.519 --> 00:24:13.059
would read this Dead Fast Love of the Lord and

00:24:13.059 --> 00:24:16.920
the specific scripture, but then he would bring

00:24:16.920 --> 00:24:20.259
other aspects of his character to mind. And I

00:24:20.259 --> 00:24:23.500
would say, but you are this, you are kind, you

00:24:23.500 --> 00:24:26.819
are merciful, you know all things, you see all

00:24:26.819 --> 00:24:30.339
things. And then I'd spend even more time on

00:24:30.339 --> 00:24:34.900
that and, you know, feel completely... refreshed

00:24:34.900 --> 00:24:37.599
and healed, and that continued for years. And

00:24:37.599 --> 00:24:39.759
now when I look back, the scripture that you

00:24:39.759 --> 00:24:43.339
had said where it produces endurance. Yeah, Romans

00:24:43.339 --> 00:24:46.259
5, Romans 5. And then at the end it says, and

00:24:46.259 --> 00:24:49.559
hope. That's all about hope. And I'd leave that

00:24:49.559 --> 00:24:52.420
time with the Lord very hopeful. And that had

00:24:52.420 --> 00:24:55.099
to, you know, that was just in the process of

00:24:55.099 --> 00:24:57.279
healing. It was a progression. Because the next

00:24:57.279 --> 00:25:01.079
day I'd see a commercial or I'd see my pregnant

00:25:01.079 --> 00:25:04.039
friend or, you know, and then the whole process

00:25:04.039 --> 00:25:06.279
would begin again. But each time the process

00:25:06.279 --> 00:25:09.380
would happen through the years, there was more

00:25:09.380 --> 00:25:13.160
hope. There was more, um, he had produced that

00:25:13.160 --> 00:25:15.759
long suffering in me, that endurance that, that

00:25:15.759 --> 00:25:20.720
I could, I can endure. I will endure. It's not

00:25:20.720 --> 00:25:23.259
an option not to endure. I will because you're

00:25:23.259 --> 00:25:26.039
with me. And joy came back eventually. I mean,

00:25:26.039 --> 00:25:28.500
that's not, that's not something that, you know,

00:25:28.500 --> 00:25:31.839
it happens overnight, but. There was joy in the

00:25:31.839 --> 00:25:34.880
midst of it, even in the hospital room, because

00:25:34.880 --> 00:25:38.660
I had joy in my salvation. I knew who I was.

00:25:39.279 --> 00:25:42.099
So there was that joy and sorrow mingled and

00:25:42.099 --> 00:25:46.059
that still, you know, happens today. There was

00:25:46.059 --> 00:25:50.319
that joy even in the midst of, you know, the

00:25:50.319 --> 00:25:54.220
wailing. I felt like even in the midst of that,

00:25:54.880 --> 00:25:58.359
the joy of the Lord is my strength. He really

00:25:58.539 --> 00:26:03.119
was very present and very active, the Holy Spirit.

00:26:03.539 --> 00:26:05.859
Yeah, I mean, you couldn't just hold yourself

00:26:05.859 --> 00:26:08.680
away up for a long time because you had two young

00:26:08.680 --> 00:26:12.539
boys. And, you know, in the midst of your busy

00:26:12.539 --> 00:26:15.279
life and your grief, the Lord blessed you with

00:26:15.279 --> 00:26:19.660
another son. And with that, actually came another

00:26:19.660 --> 00:26:24.420
opportunity to trust him. Yes, so... We didn't

00:26:24.420 --> 00:26:27.900
know but when he was born and there's just miraculous

00:26:27.900 --> 00:26:31.299
things all around how I scheduled his c -section

00:26:31.299 --> 00:26:34.480
and had pediatricians in there that I wanted

00:26:34.480 --> 00:26:36.980
and I you know, they all thought that I had pre

00:26:36.980 --> 00:26:39.319
-planned this because I knew that our third son

00:26:39.319 --> 00:26:43.579
had a cleft lip and palate and I didn't know

00:26:43.579 --> 00:26:46.000
and they were kind of amazed because I had everything

00:26:46.000 --> 00:26:48.519
set up that I wanted everything in the room because

00:26:48.519 --> 00:26:52.279
prior, you know, they you have a c -section because

00:26:52.279 --> 00:26:56.619
I've had all C -sections. So with that, this

00:26:56.619 --> 00:26:59.680
is my fourth C -section. They would take the

00:26:59.680 --> 00:27:02.259
baby and then I'd be in all by myself. I was

00:27:02.259 --> 00:27:04.279
like, no, I want the baby to stay in with me.

00:27:04.339 --> 00:27:07.500
Can we work that out? And so I had made calls

00:27:07.500 --> 00:27:11.480
to have him wait and all the stuff right in the

00:27:11.480 --> 00:27:15.039
room. And so I was able to have him with me the

00:27:15.039 --> 00:27:17.950
entire time of my recovery. So that was... really

00:27:17.950 --> 00:27:20.150
sweet. Yes, he was born with a cleft lip and

00:27:20.150 --> 00:27:23.329
palate and we had friends in our church who had

00:27:23.329 --> 00:27:27.630
a daughter had the same thing and they came and

00:27:27.630 --> 00:27:32.609
comforted us and got us in touch with Operation

00:27:32.609 --> 00:27:35.549
Smile, Dr. McGee, who was right in Norfolk, Virginia.

00:27:35.950 --> 00:27:37.690
I mean, initially you thought that it was just

00:27:37.690 --> 00:27:40.349
like tragic and the end of the world. I mean,

00:27:40.349 --> 00:27:42.849
I mean, we were like Steve, especially we did.

00:27:42.930 --> 00:27:45.309
We didn't know. Like, what is this? How we did.

00:27:45.490 --> 00:27:47.430
And actually we called a friend on the phone.

00:27:47.490 --> 00:27:49.869
Steve did. And he's just crying on the phone

00:27:49.869 --> 00:27:53.109
and he's making his friend cry on the phone and

00:27:53.109 --> 00:27:55.990
he's crying and and because he couldn't get it

00:27:55.990 --> 00:27:59.960
out, you know. He was stuttering and he goes,

00:28:00.140 --> 00:28:02.279
he's like, the baby, the baby. And of course,

00:28:02.900 --> 00:28:05.599
his friend on the phone thought, oh my gosh,

00:28:05.740 --> 00:28:08.859
not another tragedy. What happened to the baby?

00:28:09.460 --> 00:28:11.660
And Steve finally got it out that he had a cleft

00:28:11.660 --> 00:28:13.859
lip and palate. And he's like, oh my gosh, that's

00:28:13.859 --> 00:28:18.839
fixable. That's nothing. He'll be fine. That

00:28:18.839 --> 00:28:24.220
was just fantastic having them in our lives.

00:28:24.480 --> 00:28:27.940
Just our whole small group. was fantastic. And

00:28:27.940 --> 00:28:32.180
so, yeah, we had a few months there to walk through

00:28:32.180 --> 00:28:36.319
with that. But, you know, he's a vibrant 29 year

00:28:36.319 --> 00:28:39.359
old and doing so well. You know, he has had to

00:28:39.359 --> 00:28:41.680
walk through things to and trust the Lord. So

00:28:41.680 --> 00:28:45.019
we walk through together as a family. By that

00:28:45.019 --> 00:28:49.079
time, you had pretty good trust in the Lord and

00:28:49.079 --> 00:28:52.180
could be an example to your kids. I mean, that's,

00:28:52.180 --> 00:28:54.119
you know, I know through the years when I looked

00:28:54.119 --> 00:28:57.529
at my parents, and the things that they walked

00:28:57.529 --> 00:28:59.170
through, and they were transparent with us. I

00:28:59.170 --> 00:29:02.289
mean, as transparent as appropriate, you know,

00:29:02.529 --> 00:29:06.029
but it taught me, you know, how to trust in the

00:29:06.029 --> 00:29:08.869
Lord. It taught me how to turn anger into forgiveness.

00:29:09.089 --> 00:29:12.390
It taught me how to, you know, even when something

00:29:12.390 --> 00:29:16.859
happened to them that was not fair, how they

00:29:16.859 --> 00:29:18.960
released it to the Lord. It taught me how to

00:29:18.960 --> 00:29:22.660
do that, too. And I'm sure your example has helped

00:29:22.660 --> 00:29:25.680
him through his life. I hope so. It seems to

00:29:25.680 --> 00:29:29.940
have. So, I mean, yeah, we have a very good relationship.

00:29:30.160 --> 00:29:33.240
Well, eventually, Christ has subsided and you

00:29:33.240 --> 00:29:36.019
could turn your focus to raising your boys and

00:29:36.019 --> 00:29:39.339
looking back on raising four or three rambunctious

00:29:39.339 --> 00:29:41.839
boys in that time. What lessons did you learn?

00:29:42.039 --> 00:29:43.859
What parenting lessons did you learn that you

00:29:43.859 --> 00:29:47.039
want to share with us? Being parents of the 90s,

00:29:48.079 --> 00:29:52.160
we were a bit fearful and I suppose that was

00:29:52.160 --> 00:29:55.599
a little bit more legalistic, if you will, at

00:29:55.599 --> 00:29:59.480
that point. I think we grew over time. So, you

00:29:59.480 --> 00:30:02.480
know, when we get together as the four boys and,

00:30:02.559 --> 00:30:04.380
you know, you've got two older ones and then

00:30:04.380 --> 00:30:07.539
there's a... break, and then you've got the two

00:30:07.539 --> 00:30:11.059
younger ones. We wanted lists. We wanted everybody

00:30:11.059 --> 00:30:14.960
to tell us what to do. I know we had great friends

00:30:14.960 --> 00:30:17.279
that would say, nope, you got to pray and ask

00:30:17.279 --> 00:30:19.920
God yourself. I can't give you a list. There

00:30:19.920 --> 00:30:22.200
was like, what music can they listen to? And

00:30:22.200 --> 00:30:26.579
we were like, he said, no, you're going to have

00:30:26.579 --> 00:30:28.640
to pray and ask God for your own music list.

00:30:28.759 --> 00:30:33.039
I can't tell you. So that was kind of a funny

00:30:33.039 --> 00:30:37.470
side story there. But I think over time you learn

00:30:37.470 --> 00:30:41.210
to trust the Lord. We trust the Lord, but yet,

00:30:41.349 --> 00:30:44.490
gosh, you want to protect your kids so dearly

00:30:44.490 --> 00:30:48.369
from the outside influences of things. And yet,

00:30:48.910 --> 00:30:51.210
if I could do it again, the younger two, we did

00:30:51.210 --> 00:30:53.730
a bit different and allowed a little bit more

00:30:53.730 --> 00:30:56.829
into their lives earlier so that they could learn

00:30:56.829 --> 00:31:00.109
how to develop their own sense of who the Lord

00:31:00.109 --> 00:31:06.599
is and carry themselves and make critical, logical

00:31:06.599 --> 00:31:10.559
decisions at a younger age. You know, I think

00:31:10.559 --> 00:31:13.359
we waited too long. I think we were just, you

00:31:13.359 --> 00:31:16.680
know, you just don't want to let the winds and

00:31:16.680 --> 00:31:20.180
the waves come against them. Social media was

00:31:20.180 --> 00:31:24.460
starting when my oldest was around 15, 16, somewhere

00:31:24.460 --> 00:31:27.200
in there. I mean, that just undid us because

00:31:27.200 --> 00:31:30.980
here now, everything's in our house now that

00:31:30.980 --> 00:31:33.240
we were trying to keep at bay. You just, it's

00:31:33.240 --> 00:31:36.329
on a click away. I think social media is just

00:31:36.329 --> 00:31:39.549
now that it has been around for 20 plus years,

00:31:39.809 --> 00:31:42.509
it's, you can just see the bad side effects of

00:31:42.509 --> 00:31:44.750
it all. Yeah. And there are a few more safeguards

00:31:44.750 --> 00:31:47.650
today, a few in social media than there were

00:31:47.650 --> 00:31:50.089
back in the, or when it first started. I mean,

00:31:50.190 --> 00:31:52.869
everything was just available. And you also really

00:31:52.869 --> 00:31:55.529
prayed child by child what to do with their schooling.

00:31:55.849 --> 00:31:58.730
Absolutely. We did. We know one was homeschooled.

00:31:58.730 --> 00:32:02.000
One was sent to like a homeschool enrichment,

00:32:02.480 --> 00:32:05.440
or then a friend had started a small private

00:32:05.440 --> 00:32:08.160
school. So we had three different options. And

00:32:08.160 --> 00:32:13.359
so we just kind of rotated each kid to where

00:32:13.359 --> 00:32:17.359
is my capability. My capability, I'm, you know,

00:32:17.480 --> 00:32:20.319
maybe algebra one. There is a thing to being

00:32:20.319 --> 00:32:23.180
around people and socialization and just being

00:32:23.180 --> 00:32:26.440
able to interact. We started finding ways to

00:32:26.440 --> 00:32:28.920
do that and we made it through. They're all doing

00:32:28.920 --> 00:32:31.160
well and you know the encouragement I would have

00:32:31.160 --> 00:32:33.700
to a young mother right now is just they will

00:32:33.700 --> 00:32:36.640
learn it. Every every kid learns differently

00:32:36.640 --> 00:32:39.720
and I had all four four were different different

00:32:39.720 --> 00:32:42.359
kinds of learners and so they'll get it. And

00:32:42.359 --> 00:32:45.619
the birth of your fourth son that's a sweet story

00:32:45.619 --> 00:32:48.819
share share about that. After our third son was

00:32:48.819 --> 00:32:52.819
born he was turning four in May and so in April

00:32:53.019 --> 00:32:56.880
I just thought, okay, I'm turning, I'm 35. If

00:32:56.880 --> 00:32:59.900
we want, I felt like we were supposed to have

00:32:59.900 --> 00:33:02.680
one more. You know, I look back at that and I

00:33:02.680 --> 00:33:05.599
think, oh my gosh, in fifth C -section, are you

00:33:05.599 --> 00:33:08.779
insane? Yeah, I didn't really connect that all

00:33:08.779 --> 00:33:12.980
back then, but I just felt strongly about the

00:33:12.980 --> 00:33:16.799
Lord wanting us to have, and so I wrote my husband

00:33:16.799 --> 00:33:22.819
a note and explained what I felt. I left it in

00:33:22.819 --> 00:33:24.920
his hands. I said, you know, you know, maybe

00:33:24.920 --> 00:33:27.599
it's just because I'm getting older and I'm wanting

00:33:27.599 --> 00:33:29.920
another, you know, just for the sake, I don't

00:33:29.920 --> 00:33:34.539
know. You decide if this is right for our family,

00:33:34.859 --> 00:33:37.319
but this is how I'm feeling. And, you know, he

00:33:37.319 --> 00:33:40.960
took it and he prayed about it for a few weeks

00:33:40.960 --> 00:33:45.700
and he said, okay, yeah, the Lord told me to

00:33:45.700 --> 00:33:48.039
trust him. I was pregnant within the next month

00:33:48.039 --> 00:33:50.240
and then our fourth son was born in December.

00:33:50.569 --> 00:33:53.569
right before December 2000. We had an 11 -year

00:33:53.569 --> 00:33:58.849
-old and a baby. When God told Steve to trust

00:33:58.849 --> 00:34:02.650
him, it was actually even a little bit more than

00:34:02.650 --> 00:34:05.670
just the birth of a fourth child because he had

00:34:05.670 --> 00:34:08.829
a job transition. He knew that he was going to

00:34:08.829 --> 00:34:14.389
have a job transition, but he was going from

00:34:14.389 --> 00:34:17.989
one job and then got another job and it was right.

00:34:18.539 --> 00:34:22.119
I mean, there wasn't a missed day of work. And

00:34:22.119 --> 00:34:24.820
that was amazing because sometimes, you know,

00:34:24.840 --> 00:34:28.400
if you're exiting one position, it might take

00:34:28.400 --> 00:34:33.159
some time to get another one. But it was seamless.

00:34:33.420 --> 00:34:35.960
You had a season where God just showed his faithfulness

00:34:35.960 --> 00:34:40.139
to you. But then in 2018, you faced another battle,

00:34:40.579 --> 00:34:43.980
cancer diagnosis. I know when anyone hears the

00:34:43.980 --> 00:34:46.539
word cancer, fear tries to come in. I've been

00:34:46.539 --> 00:34:49.260
there myself twice. So share a little bit about

00:34:49.260 --> 00:34:51.800
your journey, what you went through and how you

00:34:51.800 --> 00:34:55.639
have seen God take that, even that hard place

00:34:55.639 --> 00:34:58.920
and use it for good in your life. It felt pain

00:34:58.920 --> 00:35:04.199
on the left side of my left breast. And I thought,

00:35:04.199 --> 00:35:06.880
you know, maybe it's just my, the underwire of

00:35:06.880 --> 00:35:09.300
my bra poking me, but it just felt different.

00:35:09.519 --> 00:35:13.880
And so I went in for a mammogram and then I had

00:35:13.880 --> 00:35:19.690
to go to subsequent. other mammograms. And then

00:35:19.690 --> 00:35:23.550
the lady who was doing this third one said, yeah,

00:35:23.630 --> 00:35:26.550
you need to go and get a biopsy. And I could

00:35:26.550 --> 00:35:29.389
see it on her face. We have a physician in our

00:35:29.389 --> 00:35:33.210
church that, you know, he's a surgeon and I called

00:35:33.210 --> 00:35:37.630
him and he got me in immediately. And then I

00:35:37.630 --> 00:35:40.550
took a friend, and a week later we went in and

00:35:40.550 --> 00:35:43.070
got the diagnosis, yes, you have cancer. But

00:35:43.070 --> 00:35:45.809
he was like Jesus with skin. The way he prayed

00:35:45.809 --> 00:35:49.889
and counseled me, I felt like I was in the throne

00:35:49.889 --> 00:35:53.329
room of God, you know? He was fantastic. It was

00:35:53.329 --> 00:35:56.500
hard. had been prepared so well in my heart.

00:35:56.619 --> 00:35:59.420
There was no other response but trust. It was

00:35:59.420 --> 00:36:03.440
hard, and maybe a few times why, but I didn't

00:36:03.440 --> 00:36:08.340
linger there. I was very confident in that I

00:36:08.340 --> 00:36:10.960
was in God's hands and my days are numbered by

00:36:10.960 --> 00:36:13.059
Him. I was going to do all I could to fight,

00:36:13.059 --> 00:36:18.300
you know? So, you know, I tried, obviously nutrition

00:36:18.300 --> 00:36:22.239
-wise, but I did the chemotherapy and the double

00:36:22.239 --> 00:36:27.429
mastectomy. and reconstruction, and I made it

00:36:27.429 --> 00:36:30.170
through. And during that time, God was doing

00:36:30.170 --> 00:36:33.050
a work in your family, your parents specifically.

00:36:33.550 --> 00:36:35.829
Share about that. Right before I started chemo,

00:36:35.929 --> 00:36:38.610
my dad called me and he said, you know, I just

00:36:38.610 --> 00:36:40.849
don't understand why, you know, you're going

00:36:40.849 --> 00:36:44.389
through this and nobody in our family has it,

00:36:44.989 --> 00:36:48.289
and nobody in your mom's family. And so I said,

00:36:48.309 --> 00:36:51.150
you know, I'm trusting the Lord. I just feel

00:36:51.150 --> 00:36:55.239
like... I don't know why. Again, there's just,

00:36:55.579 --> 00:36:58.039
there's many things in my life. I'm not sure

00:36:58.039 --> 00:37:01.559
why. And I'm comfortable with that. I'm very,

00:37:01.559 --> 00:37:03.980
very comfortable. I don't even need to know when

00:37:03.980 --> 00:37:07.639
I get to heaven because I'll be so thrilled to

00:37:07.639 --> 00:37:09.920
be there. It's not going to matter. I don't think,

00:37:10.219 --> 00:37:14.059
you know, they were telling friends at the retirement

00:37:14.059 --> 00:37:17.500
community about this, and then people started

00:37:17.500 --> 00:37:20.719
praying for them, and they joined a Bible study.

00:37:21.280 --> 00:37:25.159
And so, and then he had an experience with the

00:37:25.159 --> 00:37:28.659
Lord, and I met his Bible study leader, and he

00:37:28.659 --> 00:37:32.420
felt like he had a genuine, you know, experience

00:37:32.420 --> 00:37:35.320
with the Lord. I'm confident in my mother as

00:37:35.320 --> 00:37:40.079
well, and they, through the cancer, I'm pretty

00:37:40.079 --> 00:37:44.659
sure that they are walking, you know, with Christ.

00:37:45.340 --> 00:37:49.519
So that's exciting. Now, you know, don't say

00:37:49.519 --> 00:37:53.820
the same words we say or, you know, it's a late

00:37:53.820 --> 00:37:56.760
life conversion where you're, you know, confident,

00:37:56.760 --> 00:37:59.380
you know, we'll all be in heaven together. So

00:37:59.380 --> 00:38:01.940
that's exciting. Yeah. So Jill, as we begin to

00:38:01.940 --> 00:38:04.000
wrap up, are there any final words of encouragement

00:38:04.000 --> 00:38:06.539
you want to leave with our listening friends

00:38:06.539 --> 00:38:09.219
today? Trust the Lord. I know that just sounds

00:38:09.630 --> 00:38:12.030
that can just sound kind of rote, especially

00:38:12.030 --> 00:38:14.389
when you're going through something and somebody

00:38:14.389 --> 00:38:17.869
says, oh, trust the Lord. And it's a little deeper

00:38:17.869 --> 00:38:24.110
than that. I would say he is faithful even when

00:38:24.110 --> 00:38:29.389
we are questioning. He's faithful. We really

00:38:29.389 --> 00:38:34.889
focus on who God is, all of his attributes. Even

00:38:34.889 --> 00:38:38.829
if we don't understand them all, there are mysteries

00:38:38.829 --> 00:38:42.159
that I'm content with because he never leaves

00:38:42.159 --> 00:38:44.780
us or forsakes us. He never ever and he never

00:38:44.780 --> 00:38:49.980
will. And so it's he is a rock, you know, I'm

00:38:49.980 --> 00:38:53.000
I'm anchored in him. Yeah, over and over again,

00:38:53.000 --> 00:38:56.800
you have talked about how you learned God's character

00:38:56.800 --> 00:38:59.780
and you learned who he was. And so when the crisis

00:38:59.780 --> 00:39:03.280
came, you could stand on the rock and, you know,

00:39:03.320 --> 00:39:05.599
the winds came and beat against the rock and

00:39:05.599 --> 00:39:08.679
you didn't fall. didn't mean that the winds didn't

00:39:08.679 --> 00:39:10.559
beat and you didn't feel the winds. Correct.

00:39:11.059 --> 00:39:13.699
But you didn't crumble. The more we know God,

00:39:14.900 --> 00:39:16.679
certainly when you're in bad times, you want

00:39:16.679 --> 00:39:20.500
to press into the character of God and learn

00:39:20.500 --> 00:39:23.900
who he is. But even in the good times, even in

00:39:23.900 --> 00:39:26.489
the good times, that's where you build it. lean

00:39:26.489 --> 00:39:28.610
in and learn that God is good and everything

00:39:28.610 --> 00:39:31.289
he does is good and God is faithful and he has

00:39:31.289 --> 00:39:34.449
good plans for you and you know he's loving and

00:39:34.449 --> 00:39:37.570
true and he sees all things and knows all things

00:39:37.570 --> 00:39:39.630
he's our mighty creator all the things you know

00:39:39.630 --> 00:39:42.989
that we can learn about God that help us cling

00:39:42.989 --> 00:39:45.789
to the rock when we need it correct so that the

00:39:45.789 --> 00:39:50.610
scriptures Romans 828 and we know that for those

00:39:50.610 --> 00:39:53.750
who love God All things work together for good

00:39:53.750 --> 00:39:56.449
for those who are called according to his purpose.

00:39:57.010 --> 00:40:00.769
And that will build your spiritual muscles there.

00:40:00.969 --> 00:40:03.510
And then also God's everlasting love, that would

00:40:03.510 --> 00:40:09.550
be the title. It's still in Romans 31. What shall

00:40:09.550 --> 00:40:11.909
we say to these things? If God is for us, who

00:40:11.909 --> 00:40:15.289
can be against us? He who did not spare his own

00:40:15.289 --> 00:40:18.030
son, but gave him up for us all, how will he

00:40:18.030 --> 00:40:21.489
not also with him graciously give us all things?

00:40:21.760 --> 00:40:27.480
That is every day. Because it starts with, he

00:40:27.480 --> 00:40:30.800
who did not spare his own son. So that's why

00:40:30.800 --> 00:40:33.619
you have joy in the middle of it, even at the

00:40:33.619 --> 00:40:36.679
very heights of suffering. Because, you know,

00:40:36.679 --> 00:40:38.820
the first button on my shirt is buttoned, if

00:40:38.820 --> 00:40:41.820
you will. I'm in Christ. That can't be taken

00:40:41.820 --> 00:40:45.579
from me. And also, who shall bring any charge

00:40:45.579 --> 00:40:48.739
against God's elect? Is it God who justifies?

00:40:50.110 --> 00:40:52.590
Who is he to condemn? Jesus Christ is the one

00:40:52.590 --> 00:40:57.150
who died. More than that, who was raised. Who

00:40:57.150 --> 00:41:00.289
is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding

00:41:00.289 --> 00:41:05.010
for us? Who shall separate us from the love of

00:41:05.010 --> 00:41:08.829
Christ? Shall tribulation, shall distress, or

00:41:08.829 --> 00:41:12.670
persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger,

00:41:12.889 --> 00:41:16.369
or sword? As it is written, for your sake we

00:41:16.369 --> 00:41:19.150
are all being killed all the day long. We are

00:41:19.150 --> 00:41:22.570
regarded as sheep to be slaughtered. No, in all

00:41:22.570 --> 00:41:25.550
these things we are more than conquerors through

00:41:25.550 --> 00:41:28.630
him who loved us. For I am sure that neither

00:41:28.630 --> 00:41:32.329
death nor life nor angels nor rulers nor things

00:41:32.329 --> 00:41:36.590
present nor things to come nor powers nor height

00:41:36.590 --> 00:41:39.769
or depth or anything else in all creation will

00:41:39.769 --> 00:41:43.090
be able to separate us from the love of God in

00:41:43.090 --> 00:41:46.510
Jesus Christ our Lord. That would be my encouragement.

00:41:46.829 --> 00:41:50.039
I mean those are daily thoughts and prayers.

00:41:50.239 --> 00:41:53.320
I never grow tired of them. Amen. Well now, before

00:41:53.320 --> 00:41:55.980
we close, is there a woman in the Bible whose

00:41:55.980 --> 00:41:59.039
story has really spoken to you? How is her journey

00:41:59.039 --> 00:42:01.320
encouraged or shaped your own? I've probably

00:42:01.320 --> 00:42:03.739
read the most about Sarah. I mean, I do love

00:42:03.739 --> 00:42:08.000
Ruth and Esther, but you know, with Sarah and

00:42:08.000 --> 00:42:12.800
her trust in the Lord, she made mistakes. And

00:42:12.800 --> 00:42:15.889
she didn't always obviously say the right things

00:42:15.889 --> 00:42:18.309
and when you know when the angels came and said

00:42:18.309 --> 00:42:20.809
she'd have a baby and she was in the house and

00:42:20.809 --> 00:42:23.889
she laughed to herself and and then the Lord

00:42:23.889 --> 00:42:26.690
confronted her you laughed and oh I didn't laugh

00:42:26.690 --> 00:42:34.710
you know so like so he he his faithfulness continued

00:42:34.710 --> 00:42:40.030
with Sarah and Abraham even in the midst of all

00:42:40.030 --> 00:42:43.679
the questioning. I mean, they were strengthened.

00:42:44.300 --> 00:42:46.719
Eventually, you know, Abraham was able to take

00:42:46.719 --> 00:42:50.159
Isaac up and really trust God. But he didn't

00:42:50.159 --> 00:42:53.440
trust God for many, many. I mean, he kept saying

00:42:53.440 --> 00:42:56.260
to the kings, this is my sister. And then, of

00:42:56.260 --> 00:43:02.750
course, Sarah, you know, take Hagar. kept his

00:43:02.750 --> 00:43:05.130
promise. He kept his faithfulness. He's never

00:43:05.130 --> 00:43:08.849
going to change. And here we have Christ, you

00:43:08.849 --> 00:43:12.349
know, they were just seeing through a very dim

00:43:12.349 --> 00:43:16.050
glass, if you will. They didn't have the Holy

00:43:16.050 --> 00:43:19.369
Spirit. They, you know, and they would go years

00:43:19.369 --> 00:43:21.329
without hearing from the Lord, and then he'd

00:43:21.329 --> 00:43:28.170
appear. You know, so anyway, I would say Sarah,

00:43:28.409 --> 00:43:32.449
she certainly did have lot of trust but a lot

00:43:32.449 --> 00:43:36.210
of mistakes too and God as you said God was so

00:43:36.210 --> 00:43:39.909
faithful to her and did he oh you've made a mistake

00:43:39.909 --> 00:43:44.510
I can't my promise is now null and void no no

00:43:44.510 --> 00:43:49.030
no he picks people weak you know sinners weak

00:43:49.030 --> 00:43:53.429
people you know and I think he knows we're gonna

00:43:53.429 --> 00:43:56.969
make mistakes and so he's obviously prepared

00:43:56.969 --> 00:44:01.320
to help us through even those yeah Well, as Jill

00:44:01.320 --> 00:44:05.460
mentioned, Romans 8 .28 tells us that God causes

00:44:05.460 --> 00:44:08.420
everything to work together for the good of those

00:44:08.420 --> 00:44:11.360
who love Him and are called according to His

00:44:11.360 --> 00:44:14.400
purpose for them. You know, so often in the middle

00:44:14.400 --> 00:44:16.320
of our pain or in the middle of our confusion,

00:44:16.480 --> 00:44:18.980
it's hard to imagine what good could possibly

00:44:18.980 --> 00:44:21.639
come from it, because we're trapped in time.

00:44:22.099 --> 00:44:25.599
But God sees the whole picture. And if we let

00:44:25.599 --> 00:44:28.960
Him, He'll begin to show us His eternal perspective.

00:44:29.179 --> 00:44:31.579
and things start to come into focus a little

00:44:31.579 --> 00:44:36.920
bit more. Mark Rogop, I'm probably murdering

00:44:36.920 --> 00:44:39.679
his name, but in his book he says something I

00:44:39.679 --> 00:44:43.260
find really helpful. You need to know that lament

00:44:43.260 --> 00:44:45.460
does not always lead to an immediate solution.

00:44:46.000 --> 00:44:48.480
It does not always bring a quick or timely answer.

00:44:49.280 --> 00:44:53.940
Grief is not tame. Lament is not a simplistic

00:44:53.940 --> 00:44:58.300
formula. Instead, Lament is the song you sing,

00:44:58.420 --> 00:45:02.000
believing that one day God will answer and restore.

00:45:02.920 --> 00:45:05.199
Lament invites us to pray through our struggle

00:45:05.199 --> 00:45:08.519
with a life that is far from perfect. Jill has

00:45:08.519 --> 00:45:11.239
lived that out. She's seen God answer and restore.

00:45:11.659 --> 00:45:14.179
And I want to encourage you today, hold on to

00:45:14.179 --> 00:45:17.179
your trust in God. And if you don't know his

00:45:17.179 --> 00:45:22.059
character, read your word and find out his character.

00:45:23.170 --> 00:45:25.530
Ask him to lift your eyes and give you an eternal

00:45:25.530 --> 00:45:28.630
perspective because he will. He's faithful. He's

00:45:28.630 --> 00:45:32.250
faithful to do that. He's faithful to do it for

00:45:32.250 --> 00:45:34.750
you just as he's done it for Jill and for so

00:45:34.750 --> 00:45:37.809
many others. So Jill, before we close, would

00:45:37.809 --> 00:45:40.309
you take a moment and pray for our dear friends?

00:45:40.750 --> 00:45:43.010
Dear Heavenly Father, I thank you for everybody

00:45:43.010 --> 00:45:45.949
listening. Lord, I just pray that you would send

00:45:45.949 --> 00:45:50.750
your Holy Spirit right now to comfort, to gird

00:45:50.750 --> 00:45:57.309
up, to restore, to bring hope, and also to teach,

00:45:57.929 --> 00:46:03.349
to give them endurance to run the race. God,

00:46:03.710 --> 00:46:07.710
you will be faithful. You are faithful at this

00:46:07.710 --> 00:46:13.829
very moment. Continue to give strength, continue

00:46:13.829 --> 00:46:18.070
to enlighten your Word into the depths of their

00:46:18.070 --> 00:46:23.329
souls, Lord, I pray, and give them eternal perspective

00:46:23.329 --> 00:46:28.150
as well with what they're going through and that

00:46:28.150 --> 00:46:32.809
God will use it for good in Jesus name. Amen.

00:46:33.349 --> 00:46:36.070
Amen. I want to also pray a blessing over you

00:46:36.070 --> 00:46:39.429
using Paul's words in Ephesians 3 16 through

00:46:39.429 --> 00:46:45.789
19. I pray that from his glorious unlimited resources

00:46:45.789 --> 00:46:47.929
he will empower you with inner strength through

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his spirit. Then Christ will make his home in

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your hearts. as you trust in him. I pray that

00:46:53.619 --> 00:46:57.139
your roots will grow deep into God's love and

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keep you strong, that you would know the power,

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you would have the power to understand as all

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God's people should how wide and long and high

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and deep his love is. I pray that you would experience

00:47:09.239 --> 00:47:12.179
the love of God though it's too great to understand

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fully. and that you will be made complete with

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all the fullness of life and power that comes

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from God. In Jesus name, amen. And friend, don't

00:47:22.210 --> 00:47:25.710
forget that you can visit hergodstory .org to

00:47:25.710 --> 00:47:27.730
find today's show notes with all the scriptures

00:47:27.730 --> 00:47:30.909
we talked about. We'll have a link to a video

00:47:30.909 --> 00:47:33.789
of Jill's cancer journey and a link to download

00:47:33.789 --> 00:47:35.949
your free six -week devotional on Women of the

00:47:35.949 --> 00:47:38.190
Bible. It's a wonderful way to strengthen your

00:47:38.190 --> 00:47:40.980
faith and go deeper in God's Word. And if you'd

00:47:40.980 --> 00:47:43.159
like to be part of something bigger, make a difference

00:47:43.159 --> 00:47:45.860
for others, consider giving to the Widow and

00:47:45.860 --> 00:47:48.039
Orphan Fund. Just click Help Now on our website.

00:47:48.960 --> 00:47:52.280
It's simple. If you need prayer, please reach

00:47:52.280 --> 00:47:55.739
out. You are not alone. You can call or text

00:47:55.739 --> 00:48:01.019
anytime to our 24 -7 prayer line at 855 -459

00:48:01.019 --> 00:48:04.380
-CARE or email us anytime at prayer at somebodycares

00:48:04.380 --> 00:48:08.219
.org. We are here for you. Until next time, keep

00:48:08.219 --> 00:48:11.230
trusting God. because he is still writing your

00:48:11.230 --> 00:48:13.969
story. Her God Story is a ministry of Somebody

00:48:13.969 --> 00:48:16.570
Cares America and International. To find out

00:48:16.570 --> 00:48:19.510
more about or support the ministry go to somebodycares

00:48:19.510 --> 00:48:20.170
.org.