Whatchu Talking About Willis

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Speaker 1: Welcome to j dot Ill, a production of I Heart Radio. Oh like Kate, follow me something me goes me. Guys, it's j dot Ill the podcast. It's your girl, Jill Scott, and I'm sitting here chilling with my grad You might see them friends Lah Saint Clair. I don't speak Spanish and speak the Spanish. I don't speak Spanish age grading dance. I'm gonna give y'all the white Man's hello. Okay, how about that? Is that? What it was? That? What that was? It's English, ain't it? Ain't that? Wow? So true? I ain't so true. It's creativity, just like it's supposed to. Yeah, it's like that. It's all good as me. You better into the room as you Oh I love that, into the room as yourself, not somebody take that. Take that with you right now? Is you know how we get all prepared and stuff, like you know, we're walking in something or their their big wigs, or they're so smarter, they're so pretty, or they're so you know whatever, rich, or they're so whatever, and then we start preparing ourselves for that, like, uh, it's over. None of that. Coming as you are they say in the church, come as you are. Only one of you in that room, only one one fantastic you man. Look I got I got the privilege and pleasure of um oh, it's allowed truck. You know. Currently I'm in Atlanta. I just want to say that I'm coming in Atlanta and um baby, you know, they really like rag racing here. They drag race all day and all night. Alright, and here comes the cops said it comes. See you can't do that in the daytime, spec right on time, right on time, like Atlanta. Somebody please tell me what's up with all the drag racing. You're killing my darristost and our podcast. You know, I think it must be they must be betting for money or something. You know, go get them. No, ron y'all like drive away anyway. I don't know on a tangent because they should ain't out. There're solving no crimes. They're busy running at the drag races. Yeah, but we aren't gonna talk about it. Oh, here should go. Here's here's like my friend, y'all, but say, don't wake it up, baby, don't wake it click that to sleep? How y'appa play? How yap? Wait? Wait? Okay, So the Tangents are real because this is what j dot the podcast is certain out to be about. So often how we start on one thing and go to the next, but we didn't even start on the one thing we're gonna have you. Have you guys ever seen this this show called skin Deep. It's not really show. It's like I've caught it on Instagram and I've caught it on TikTok and I think there's a website for it as well. Um, skin Deep. They asked these really intense questions of people, couples sometimes, um, mother and son, father and daughter, that kind of thing, best friends, lovers, you know. Um, they asked these questions and they're always so um impactful. I know exactly what you're talking about. I've seen a couple one time. I've seen a mother and daughter one time. Deeply those little Instagram games for a couple. So I'm like, I love this. This This is for everybody in their relationship. Yeah yeah, I like that spark conversation. That's kind of like what we do here our mission and purpose now, amen, it is our it is our mission and purpose to spark conversation. So I think we're looking to you to go and get some of these questions or at the very least watch skin Deep. Um. All you gotta do is is hit it on your little phone phone on your computer and skin deep and um it'll pop up for you so you can see it. But today we've got these questions that we're going to ask of each other. I'm excited because this is a long ass relationships. These some long ass relationshops reflection. This is many years of reflection. Oh god, um wow. Okay, So who goes, I'm getting a h I'm here. Okay, here we go, she said, Okay, here we go. I love it. Here we go. Here's the question, what is your favorite memory of us and why is it important to you? ASA like, yeah, like I see you throwing me in there. But I feel like I told this story already. I think favorite I'm gonna tell some of it again because I think I mean, it's two different ones, so I feel like I'm probably gonna I'm gonna share this one. So I may have said it before, but it's funny, so we're gonna get it again. I was in the basement at a club in New York called I don't remember the name of it, but it used to house the Black Lily. Back in the day. What was the name of that club? This was a New York Yeah, I'm sorry, right, So the first time, the first time that we went up there to do it, Fatina. Now, my son was still an infant and he was still nursing, and so I had not really left him before. So I'm like thinking a few hours and you know, I pumped and did the whole YadA, YadA, YadA. But what I didn't understand about leave him for hours was that my boobs were going to get engorged with milk. Now that sounds messy, and it is, but what people don't tell you is that it's super painful and it hurts. So I was in the basement of the club in pain, just wanting to be away from anyone. And there was a girl in the basement by herself, and I knew her already, but we just hadn't really like connected, but we didn't know each other. So I'm sitting there and I'm literally about to cry because my tits are hurting so bad. And the best thing about this was that she asked me what was wrong, and I told her and I started crying, and then she started crying. My titties hurt ladies and gentlemen. That girl was Jill Scott. Ladies and gentlemen. This baby, I will never forget this. I was like, this is a person capable of some deep empathy. Do you understand me? Someone? She didn't, no baby in sight. She was in a club. I could have just said, oh that, I'm sorry and left. She sat there and cried with me. I'll never forget that ship that. At that point I said, I'm I'm a funk with this person for life, like I'm a fun well like I funk with her. Yeah. Man, that's so nice. That's the best. That's one of the best things. I'll never forget that about you. Yeah, that's my favorite memory of you. Dude. I got one, but it's it's mine is more. I think the first my favorite, one of my favorite memories is the first time I met you. Jill, and I don't even know if you realized the first time we met, but it was my senior year college. I know my dad had some big birthday and he had a big party, but I opted to skip it because my friends, uh my friend that was in the roots, Mrs Questlove was like, oh, we're going to switzer into this Manto Jazz Festival, and I know your mama Flight attended, so if you want to meet us, he was like, come on, and my little flight attendant door itself was like addy birthday party. Go to Switzerland to the Manto Jazz Festival roots. And so that's what I did. I went to montro and I went to the jazz festival and I remembered this moment of meeting this couple and it was the sister and the couple had her her fro with the tightest version, I mean shout out to my Bahamada. It was like that. It was just perfect, and she had this leather jacket on, looked like she was about to go to a whole black panther me and but she literally just walked on that stage in commanded the stage and her husband that was with her at the time. I remember thinking to myself, how do I meet a forest bill Niga in Switzerland? It was just um, shout out, shout out, listen and from that moment, and it's funny because I remember Jill at that time, that's what you were doing. You would you literally were like torn with them to sing you. I think you got me at the time before it had even I feel like it wasn't even dropped or something like that, but something about it was your spirit, that smile. I wasn't expecting that mile with that the fist that you your whole situation represented. And I think from that was that was my first and favorite memory because that was like the first time I saw Jill Scott and I was like, Wow, she's fucking amazing. That's so y'all, that's nice stuff to say about some badly. It is my turn to I get to give it back. Come on, because I started sweating on that. Okay, So for me, it's it's also mantro into a land because I remember I was u huh. I remember I was walking through that. Do you remember they had all those little shops and there was lights. It was really like pretty um it was a whole bunch of shops um that they had put up like a pop up store before pop up stores, And there was so many of them, and it was all these lights, and it was at night and I was walking by myself looking around and bumped into Layah and I was so happy to know you. It was so happy. I was like, oh bye, and I saw you and I was like, wow, that's my that's my first memory. Remember I remember that. I remember that that moment. That's my first memory of you. Is it my best? Probably not? No, we got I don't know, that's one of my favorite, No, we've I remember being at um what's the party that Stacy had tasty treats, tasty treats and watching you drop it to the got darn floor and I was like, yeah, remember that you lost your mind one night. It's tasty treats. I think rich Medina was spending and you lost it and it was great every night, chick right here we did all three? Doesn't has some some moments on the dance floors? Yes? Oh yeah, we don't want to bring up any of my dance for a past. I remember one time I was very very pregnant and I went to a party and me and Layah danced on that I was pregnant with the twins. Actually yeah, it was at Silk City. I have and you have like a picture of us that night, and I remember we danced a long long time and I was very pregnant. Yeah, that's the night I bought my mother and my grandmother and we all dance and that was that was good, good, good dance for memories. We'll be back after the break. I probably told this story about Agent already. I don't know, but this, this for me, was fantastic. There's been so many God, no sense. I called her out of the clear blue sky, was like, what you're doing? She said nothing. I said, when it come hang out? She said okay, And we were introducing the babies, and she had her whole squad with her. And I remember after sweating and and and running back and forth and dressing Jet and dressing myself, and all we were gonna do is go across the street. You know. I had the stroller, I had juice, I had you know, grapes and little pieces of sandwiches and whatever else I could think of to to bring. And Agia came out of that car with all of her children. They were clean, they were lotioned. I think, I don't even think my feet were lotioned. Okay, they were lotioned. They looked so pretty and well kept and loved. And I was like, God, latest woman is amazing, I said. I remember thinking that listen, she had all the stuff that you had, sandwiches and jews, and she had all the things I had for everybody, including me. I was like, wow, like some people are just meant I had. I had been battle tested by it. And child you talk about Jet was a baby, so we're talking Dean was a baby by that child. Listen. I was numb the way you number to the back. Everybody across the street, including me, I was just impressed, Like, wow, this is a superhero. I remember that. Dad. Pictures from that day actually, um of the kids and stuff. They were hilarious. They were so funny. And my oldest always remembers that because he was the one that was old enough to know like who you were, and he always remembers that about us being at the park that day and he was like super excited about it, and you know, he talked about it later. But yeah, that was a good day. That was a real good day. Actually we had fun ALRIGHTEO, Okay, yeah is it me still? Yeah? Yeah, you're asking, Okay, I'll do it. Here we go. Here's a question. Here's a question in deep. Okay, describe one experience you wish we'll have in the future. I bet it'll be this. But me and Asian, you got the same. I know what I want. I got it, you go first because I answered first last time. Okay, I got this. We all three of us and maybe if we feel like a booze, all four of us? What up? Amber? We are going to Ghana. We is going. We is gonna, That's what I'm or We're going somewhere where we can just recline to see something. Yes, yes, somewhere somewhere. We're just going somewhere initially, but in Ghana, we're gonna. I would like I like it. I like it me too, travels a good one. I don't know. I would say I'd like to cook for y'all, but I really don't like. I don't want to cook anything for anybody anymore. So there's that, and I mean, how good are you? I'm a good cooking because I didn't haven't heard opposite, but I hadn't heard that. You was like, I'm not Patty Libelle out this mug, but you know, I mean, my thing is my thing is tight pead things. They like they never cooking you nothing. This is why I ain't never cooking you nothing. Right there? That whole situation out me. She could, but no, let me think something that we should. I would want us to to experience together. I don't know it was hard. I mean, if there exists a first between us that I don't know about, I'd love to experience something for the first time with the two of you. So I'm not really no. I mean we all have had pretty you know, involved lives with a lot of experiences, so I'm sure there's pretty be pretty tough. But I would like to say, hey, I did that for the first time with with with my gals. So you didn't say anything s nothing for me. Let's see, she said always actually called me out on it. I just was like, I couldn't come up with something. I tried to be creative. I figured a first, any first, Yeah, we can go to a male brothel together because we've never done that. Oh wow, I would I would marry Yeah, it's right. I'm sorry Africa. I'll drive you guys to the male brothel. How about that? No, I would like us to go on Safari. I would never really loved it. I've never just a first. You've done that, right, that's yeah, but not with us. And and she hers wasn't specifically a first, but also camping guys, remember it was glamp. No glamp, don't you come with j gotta come with glamp. No, we gotta say glamp to Jill and then we know we gotta gotta, we gotta. We got a massage her in there with a glamp. That you would do it in a trailer or recreational vehicle. I think that would be so fun like or bust a small tour bussy type thing. Um was there? I just decided something in the forest. I just heard a little stick break and I'm already yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, We're gonna have a gun. We're gonna have knives on the Oregon gun Range. Yeah, the gun. I've never been to the gun range. I love it. Yeah, I've never shot. I've never pretty good girl or something. Yeah, multiple, It's very loud. Friends, For any of you who are are considering, especially in these days and times, getting your license, um to to carry or license to conceal whatever, just have a gun, just know that it's excessively loud. And even though you have on those headphones, um, it's still very loud, and you don't know what the person next to you is going to be shooting. You know, they gotta they got a shotgun. That thing sound different like you need to insert your ear and the headphones unless somebody's rocking in a R which is quiet as fucking very scary because it is. I've shot that as well. So quiet, so quiet. Yea life y'all out here shooting a RS And lord, okay, well I have a question, you know, state. Yeah, I have a mountain in a place in Tennessee, and um, they asked you not to carry and be like, please don't bring your gun in here. That's how you know in the state to state be real, then CBS, please don't bring you up gun in here. But we could go up there and shoot if we wanted to. That would be dope because it's so high. The probability of hitting anyone is zip. Well, I feel like I want to experience it. Yeah, I'm just going to get into my inner Harriet Tubman, and you don't pretend I'm shooting that human traffickers. How about that? That'll that'll get me through it. I like that too. It's very age. This one is hard. This one is hard, and I want you to be honest and I will hear and the information from you because I know you love me, you know. So here we go. Oh, what's one thing I could do that would dramatically improve my life rest. M yeah, rest share say no, I'm sorry, but I mean it's seriously, you know, I get silly when I really I had this kind of fuss love conversation with you recently, and I really believe that. I think I really believe that. And I mean, like maybe even just rest to figure out what rest is for you, scadule worst, this is actually not even my rest time. This is my time to think about and decide which rest actually works for me and how my life can be centered around my rest. Oh and what does what does it look like to Jim? Mhm, it's it's a lot of it's a lot of silence. I'll tell you that, you know, no no TV in the background, nothing, just quiet nature. You know. That's that's rest for me. No agenda. I don't have plans, you know. I eat when I want rather than having and even having breakfast could be at eleven o'clock at night, like all off, Nothing in particular, in any particular kind of way is rest for me, I think because now, But I like that, the no plan, the no yeah, I like that. No doing as the feelings occur, moving as the feelings occur. Yeah, I got is it equates freedom? To me? It does. And you know, we all have like a lot of responsibility, so most of the time we don't get to do exactly that. That's what I'm still gotta still gotta, you know, gotta gotta a lot of guys. I like when this question was on you. I like that question being on you. But the god is in their place. But now we have to switch it up. I don't want I don't want to like it's easy to your dealing, It's okay, So what can we do as with you? It's us. Yeah, we have to I'm going with you, like yeah, um. One thing that I think could dramatically improve your life. One thing that I would say is at I would I would truly want you to walk into the boss that you are. I really want you to take over. I mean, if if it would make you happy. I feel like, you know, you should completely take over what's left of radio. I feel like you're the executive who could benefit what we would I call it up maybe a rock of our life, you know, since there has been radio. You know, we put it on in the car, we put it on, you know, to work out, we put it on, you know, and always have and it's it's not doing great, and I think I think you could save it. But that's my opinion, and that's that's what I got. I think that it would just fortify you because it's the thing that you happen to love. M And when you do something that you love, it looks it feels good on you. Hm. I can get behind that. But I can. I can get behind that, you you know, and even even in a larger, more umbrella way, you know, just kind of like listen, I mean, I just just kind of owning your your full the fullness of what you bring to the table. But since Jill said that already, I'm gonna say this, I think what would change your life is when i's like putting, like taking a little bag, right, putting all of the funks that you have left in that little bag and burying them bitches in the yard. M Phil, just go for it. Don't be silent, don't be worried, don't overthink, leave those funks out in the soil. My my sister, I like the first one. I said. You know, I'm not that Phil. That's that's fine. That well, I'm taking that. That's a fine, that's a good game. I'm gonna take that's good stuff, y'all. And yeah, so I'm ready for Asia now. Uh oh, so, because I know you you shut it down, Jill, I'm gonna just I'm gonna be your opening act real quick. So uh for I the S word. I look forward to asia selfishness. I look forward to asia selfishness. I look forward to a time when Asia can just think about Asia. You know what Asia needs, but Asia wants everything. And I'm thinking, as as the brood is aging, it's coming, it's the brutes. So I'm just I'm looking forward to the selfishness of Asia. It's going to be a book. I'm just like a book with chapters and activity. I'm just laughing. Kiki Ki and I'm done, you said, kits I take it, and I've I've put it. I put it in my bra there you go, it's there. I have it. I second that emotion. I fully second that emotion. I feel no regrets about it. I don't I don't feel like a Bier at this time at all. I don't like absolutely you know, I'm absolutely into the selfishness of Asia. I'm into it. Yeah, you have been mother and wife. We had this conversation recently. I am just going crazy watching this woman blossom like blossoming, you know, like we we talked about the we've we've said this in the past, the whole you know, quote unquote just having a g D. Man. This woman is brilliant and like I'm looking forward to her teaching classes and university. I'm looking forward to her traveling. Um. And I not know this, know this at all to um clearly your partner for years. Um, that's my brother and my brother. But I when a woman is blooming, it is the most beautiful thing to see ever. And you have been milk store, you know, I've been at You've been a lot of things. Two a lot of people in one house, you know, and they're they're getting older. You've got a couple more to go that before they graduate. You know. Dean is your last baby, right, he is the last. He's twelve years old. So we are halfway to the you know, you know the it's a different kind of finish line. It's a different kind of finish line. You know, you don't you don't finish like you don't stop mother. Yeah, definitely different kind of finished line. For sure. I mean, I feel good. I mean, this is definitely a different season. And I knew that it was coming. It's so funny. It's like I felt that it was coming, but then so many things happened in my life that were just like ohm boom boom boom boom that I feel like I spent a couple of years trying to kind of get you know, figure those things out. You know, my parents pass and all this other stuff happened, so I was just like, oh yeah, So now I feel like I'm moving into like the moment that I kind of missed a little bit a few years ago. So it's good. Like I'm glad friends are are saying these things, they're putting it back at me, and so I'm grateful. So I'm gonna definitely take that one. I need it. It's good and we all do. It's been in particularly women who have like multiple children over a long period of time. And you know, I got two whole sets. So it is what it is. I thank y'all, thank you. Listen. The fact that it's happening naturally is the best part. So good. It's all organic, it's just happening, and I feel allowing it, you're not fighting it. I think that's wonderful. You know what funny is like And I've written about this before where it's just like, calamity is a weird thing. It happens, and it takes up all of the space. So what happens is that all of that little space that you would use to not prioritize yourself, there's none of it left. So it's like you kind of learn, You're forced to learn how to think about you because all of that little grace that you would give life where you would just bounce back, can't do it. So you're like forced to do it, you know. So I feel like sometimes we should welcome calamity a little bit. Sometimes that can make a thing happen naturally that wouldn't necessarily happen if you have a choice, you know what I mean? Yes, my whole life every time I get fired. Ye side note and definition calamity a great misfortune or disaster as a flood or serious injury. Thank you, just so you know, calamity, yeah, should happen. You can have an emotional calamity as well as well as well all the things. Okay, so do you have another one? My last question. Okay, okay, here's here's one. If you can have something of mine, what would it be? And why tit? Tess? Just like half half t if you got the titties, I got to smile. I like to take the smile. It got to be a physical thing. Oh sorry, okay, we're not doing physical. Can we do physical? And one? Okay, let's do one. Okay, we need to get deeper into her. Okay, so I'm not gonna say the obvious because the boys come on now. I would take your confidence. I would take your confidence, even if even that sometimes you don't feel like that's what it is. I would take the perception of your confidence. Mm hmmm, I like it. That's fly. Yeah, yeah, because I don't want to put that on you because sometimes people think, oh she's so kind, but sometimes you just just be all the effort to make it look that way. But whatever, whatever, whichever one it is, Jill, I take it. I'll take it because no matter what the stage and what the what you're doing, what's up. I would take your boobs for sure. I think they're perfect. Every time every time I see her breast, I'm like, wow, they they just look great. Um, that's the physical part. What else I would take from you is your ability to smooth fit into any room that you're in. To me, from from outside in, it just seems like lie up in here, and then when I see her, she's all the way lye here and it's never like a different but she's in ever and she fits and she's like, this is what it is. I love that too. That's a really a good one. Yeah, that's because I'm being around all people that funny. That's always when I'm in rooms full of people that are like us, that we've known for years. Yeah, thankya take it. No no no, no, no no no. You really do bring a sense of authenticity everywhere you go, and that's that's not something that everybody can do. So I'm with that. I'm with that. Gosh, y'all messing me because I'll be taking my answers. I don't, okay, So I already said titties, because who doesn't want some big titties at least one, because I just take it for like a day, just like one of them things around and just kind of feel it. But other than that, let me see the other thing I would do probably is you have a keen sense one of the most keen senses of like what you want to do creatively all it's always it's it's always there, like you're always clear, tell about you know. You may not see that yourself, but I like that. I'm a liberal. I have to sit with it, think about it, bl blah blah blah blah blah. But uh, I like that you are able to kind of put your finger on what you want to do creatively bam, and it's fresh. It feels like, Oh, it's not like, oh, you recycled an idea from something else. You're able to pull your emotions into that moment, decide who you want to be in that moment, and then like produce a creative idea like that's just dope. I would take that that feels so good that if that feels so good, Wow, thanks friends. I mean, I didn't know you know how come toilen Um y'all didn't tell me Hello, what what would you take from me? I was gonna say no, actually, and I don't know this houndse but uh, I say, I say time management because I don't know how Aga continues to not only raise the babies yet we know all that that's hard but that's not the part that that really gets me. It's that she's educating herself. She's being classes, y'all. She be in real life classes, soaking it in, And that's another thing I want to be able to do, soak in and have the bandwidth that you have. And then she's still got time to TikTok okay. Like I'll be sitting here all in my head about one post on Instagram, and this bitch already did five and took five classes. So I just would like some of that. Yeah, that energy management, I'll take it. That's so funny because i'd be tired. Like you know what, I'm never gonna lie to y'all for real. What I've learned over time is like there's no such thing as time management. You just kind of do what you just feel like it needs to be done at the moment you need to do it, do what you can in that moment. Right. So I'm trying not to put things off because I'm bad at that, and because I have so many responsibilities. It's like if I put something off, it is guaranteed not to get done. So I just know it's but so many things I can do in a twenty four hour period. So if I can just decide what those things are, with those few things that go to be and I do them, I just have such a sense of relief and I feel like I could just relax and go about my day. And as I've gotten older, what I've learned to do is replace at least one of those things with just rest or scroll my phone or do whatever the hell I want to do. Because if I don't check for myself, nobody else is going to. And it's not because I don't have people in my life who love me. They do love me, but it's their responsibility to check for themselves. So it's like even though somebody might call and say, hey, you all right? You doing in daily, that's my responsibility. Like I got to check for me. And that's why it's like it's more than me getting my nails done or doing that's that's me and he It takes these nails like at least two and a half hours, like individual designs, you know what I'm saying, and tips I don't know how to do it. Look, I'm telling I don't still have the glue from my pressures. Jim Be wearing the leaf of real you think she joked, but they did fall off the other. So yeah, but this is I want to insert this one thing while we're talking about but yeah, that's what I'm saying. I want to insert this one thing. See, that's the thing, right, people can only be Joe Scott or Beyonce or whomever if they're willing and ready to do a certain amount of labor. Like that's that's labor goes with that. So I just want to insert that part of it. Like, yes, not that I don't have a lot of labor in my life. I have my own kinds of labor. But my point is that, yeah, people don't be having time because there's certain things that require certain amounts of labor and intensity, and if you want that, you have to kind of you know, you have to do that, you know what I'm saying. The beautiful thing and even like what I brought up earlier about rest is that what what Jill has done is created something really beautiful, a legacy, right, something that you know she can if she wanted to lean into and enjoy a whole lot of other kinds of freedoms, if that's what she chose to do. But all so too to make it really important, and sometimes for some people it's important to reach other goals. So yeah, if that, if those are goals that are on your plate, and that's labor that you love and labor that you're passionate about, then by all means, do do do do do do that. You know what I'm saying. For me, I'm just always trying to be kind to myself. I might have a goal, I might have a responsibility, but no one is going to be as kind to me as me. I got to make myself the kindest person to me. That can't be a message job, you know. Yeah, and outside I can't be an outside John, no nobody. So listen, this is the this is the reason why we would like you to join in any skin deep questions. You know, get a couple of friends with just one friend and ask each other the hard questions or ask each other the questions that um will surprisingly affirm you. Because I feel I feel affirmed in this moment. You know, I feel like my my people could see me. You know, my sister friends are like, sit down, I think arrested. You know, it ain't new information, but sometimes you need to hear it. For the twentieth time. Yeah, listen, sometimes you just need to hear it in a different way. What this platform does um with skin deep. It just allows you to ask questions wholeheartedly and answer them honestly. More conversation after this break. Oh, I got one, I got one that's not on the list. Ask you this one. Oh this is tough. Oh, here we go. Lord, what's one thing you wish I didn't do that hard? Well? Yeah, but if it was easy, wouldn't it be? Like that's the point. One thing I wish you did not do. I'm going to say, I wish I didn't get married. The second time. I'm going to say that you're asking us what we were individually wished we did not do, not we wish you didn't do what you wish I didn't do. And then I'll tell you what I wish you didn't do. Well, let me tell you. Here's something I wish I didn't do. I wish that I didn't squander the large amount of money that I made as a teenager in the music business. I had my first deal, I got a good chunk of money. I wish I had been better with that money, or a house or a car or something like just I wish I had done something really significant with it. So there's that. That's something I definitely wish I hadn't done. To do with it, girl, I helped Listen, I'm a black child with a black mama. Okay, some bills needed to be paid, you know, I got some clothes, you know, did that kind of stuff. You know, so you know, a little here, a little there, a little everywhere. Something I wish you didn't do. I don't even know, Like I wish that there was a particular situation in which I felt like should never have gotten your response, and you responded. Socialists happened socially and publicly, and that's that's something I wish that you hadn't done interesting fair enough and for those of you who who that's between us. But but on on a larger scale everything don't need your response, ladies and jail word up. Oh that's a lesson I learned. I got you just got hissed. I think I just got pissed. And that was that was my way of trying to find grace. No, I don't. I was trying my best to be graceful. Yeah, but you know, yeah, um I wish uh well, shoot for myself, I probably wish that I did not wait so long to pursue my dreams out in this area, like in l A, like I waited for my third time getting fired from radio, and I was like, oh yeah, remember, you had some other dreams of you know, being in TV commercials and writing and creating things. So I wish I would have maybe done that a little earlier in my life. Um, so the other parts of life could catch up. Maybe let me just remind you that Morgan Freeman started at like forty something or so, you know what I'm saying, Like, oh yeah, I hold stories like that to my heart, stories like that Larry David didn't make his first million until he was fifty. Like I'm yeah, I'm I'm here for that because I really don't live a life of regret. So it was hard for me to say that in the first place. I truly understand that everything happens for a reason, and even it was for me to serve Philadelphia as a radio person because I loved that ship anyway. But as far as Jill, I don't know. Sometimes I wish you. I wish you didn't have to live such a life of being on certain I want to say, because you don't live a life on edge, but you have to be very aware because of celebrity sometimes and I wish that you didn't. I wish you didn't have to do that, but I know that you can't have You can't have both sometimes, like I mean, you can't ask for both. Like you are a super talented woman who should be famous for her all of her talents, and so the ship that comes with it is just the ship that comes with it. But sometimes I wish that you didn't have to live your life like that. I will say this that Jill Scott does not live in my house. She gets left, you know at the gate. There's somebody else that lives in my house. I don't even say her name is is mm hmmm. That person is exceptionally loved and cared for and gets laughed at and laughed with and has chores and mops floors and you know all that stuff. It's it's like super important for for me personally to balance this thing. It's important. I watched clothes, I go grocery shopping, like I have to balance this because I don't want to get lost. Who wants to get lost in what? You in? What you do as a as an artist. Yes, yes, yes, absolutely, I love to get lost in it, but I need the balance to come home to, you know, so yeah, yeah, I I deal with it, I think honestly for realness. And I've seen people, a lot of a lot of different people try to balance it. And I would say, like, you do a really great job of pulling that part together, because you know, a lot of folks don't actually want to balance it. I mean, that's just the truth. I mean, we're all human beings, so some human beings do not really desire to have balance. They like things all crazy. And then some people, I will have to say, y'all, for those of us who are not always interacting with people who are famous quote unquote, there are some famous folks who you think their life is a hot mess, and they got some of the most chilled, balanced, pulled together home lives. You would never even believe it. And some of these folks us out there got y'all thinking everything is lovely. We ain't gonna talk about that. You don't you don't know everybody you don't know, and you won't know everybody. You just don't know. Honestly, most of it is none of your business, you know, unless unless they put it on your table and put it in you know. See. Sorry, there's there's only one thing like like, I wish you didn't do. And I don't think I'm right. I don't think I'm right. I don't have a good reason. Well, well I do, I do. I feel like I do. I wish I wish you never um broke up with them. Oh my god, I'm sorry. I loved it. It took me a minute, but when I loved it in twenties. But when I loved it, I loved it. I mean I did. I went all the way back there. Sorry, and she went two twenties. She didn't even have to. That's her friends. So what's funny is that you knew when she was talking about and she didn't even actually specify. So I'm not even gonna go there about how you knew what it was before she said it. But you do know this about lay like, I really uh to a fault. I'm friends with everybody that I loved, you know, And so as far as that person that you're talking about, I'm a loving till I'm a loving forever like and I'm the biggest fan I helped you get your publishing deal. Like I'm a big cheerleader. Um, yes, but m hm, I understand, I understand, but I have to like what I got to. So I'm happy that your happy word on everything, on everything. But I would have liked to have seen that particular situation come into understand that it's like full on boss king queen mode because it's there. Yeah, there, he just grew up yesterday. I would have liked to see that. She was, like, the arrested development is real myself. Listen, what did Erica tell me one time? She she told me it was this Ethiopian proverb but I probably said it on here before, but that a man doesn't truly maturate and till he becomes forty two years of age. Yeah, and you know that's to be angry with him if that's in the Koran. Forty is actually what's in the Koran. But yeah, wow, and what the it said I'm quoting to be angry with him for his actions before his age of maturation. It's like being angry with a retarded debate. Again, we're just given the black man the grade. There we go, ladies, just again, we're gonna get the black man some grades. I mean, that's what it's saying. But I mean, we're just gonna say blessed. We're gonna bless them, and we're gonna move forward. And I also just want to say bless That's what with this little Jim. I just want to say that. You know, I'll tell you all the time, I'm an evolutionary data and I will never go back to the music business again. And I suggest that all the ladies and fellers listen to me. If you really want long lasting, true, try to get some kind of mana. I can't even say the word man No. If you want it, you don't get it in the music business and the entertainment business. What are you talking about? Managa me? She said, Managa me. She was trying to say, trying to say, yeah, when it comes to artists and musicians and just you know, if you want that, you probably don't want an artists or a musician. I mean, they fault this and they blood. I was born to one, So I'm just saying I used to think that, but you know, you're in a special situation. I can't say that to you. Ages. It's possible, but acception, come on, come on, she's doing a self audit as we talk. Jill, you are doing a self audit as we think. Come on, come on, well, you know I'm I'm like, there's there's some people you are out of the music business. And all I'm saying right now is that you too are out of the music business as we speak. I'm out exactly, That's what I'm going. I'm in social services. I love it, she said services. I for one, still in the entertainment industry. And I will have to say that my husband is well respected. And I would also have to say this that, as far as I'm concerned, everyone would fight whoever the whole was, because sure life would be over. I would never even have to do anything. I would never have to do anything Black women that would I would have to protect her. I would have to protect her. You would have to. I would have to just have to take cover over here because it starts when you started seeing it the docks. Thing that would happen, bad, bad business. But anyhow, so many things. Is this something that you wouldn't want me to do? What I gotta stop doing? What I need to stop? What I did? What did I do? Oh? Oh no, you know where I'm going with this, what did I do? I wish you didn't sign with that label. You definitely said the same past. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that is that is high on you know, the regrets that wish I wish well it is currently the only masters that we do not own that first album, that's the only one we do not own. Were the ones that went through that company. H I'm sorry, your own your own knows right, No, not the master recording. That's not how that works. If you're on a record label, they own the master recording. They do, and they don't give it up easily. However, it's possible, So don't give up. It's all good, you know what. There are some pluses and minutes that came out of that, you know, and so we take the good with the bad. You know, you eat the meat and chew out the bones. It's all part of it, you know. It's surprised, you know. It's a thing, especially during the time that we all signed on the record labels, you know what I mean. That was a different industry in a different time, and now people have way more options. So learn from my mistakes, ladies and gents. If any of the young girl e's are listening. Yeah, yeah, are listening. This is not this is not the time to sell away at all. There listening, high knees. Oh yes, I'm Liah. Do you ask for questions? Don't you? Guys? Something? This is a good one. How how would you describe me to others? Feisty, alive, fresh, smart, sweet, black, sexy, conscious? Did I say yet? Hard working? Mm hmm o, spirity. Okay, that's nice. Okay, let's thank you. All right, let's let's do it. Okay, who were doing? Who are doing next? Uh? Let's do agent. Yea a pretty nice and smart when sweet and tough. Yeah, that's a freaking mama lion for sure. Freaky. I forgot that one for you to like ya. Oh yeah, yes, you're definitely take one to be friends with two. I feel like freaky squad. I feel like this is the squad of freak expression. I think that whatever it's gonna be said around here is going to be said over and over and over again about all of us because such similar quad. I agree, because I feel like even in the things we said about l yeah, I see those all of us to actually you know, but also and somebody shi ghy is in the mix. Too, because is don't get it twisted in the mix. Oh yeah, that happened. I have to say, I'm not shy. Y'all are both with your shy. That's weir. I'm not shy at all, like, not in any circumstance. I'm sorry. I can't even own that. Y'all Asian. That's beautiful. That you get that sentenced to me is just like, really, I'm not to take that quality. I would love I would love to take that and get some of that. I'll be straight shot for a minute. Yeah, y'all are both definitely shy. Gotta feel the round got around. And you know what's so funny about both of y'all. Both of y'all do this, which I think is so funny. Y'all are both super cerebral. So what happens is like y'all are really shy but be thinking hell of stuff. So when you finally say something, it'd be wild like what It'll be on point and it'll be cool, but it'll just be like, oh, you was in you was in your head for a minute before you said that. Like y'all are like both like boom, like y'all don't waste words. I'll put that way. Both neither one of you are waste words. I edit them a lot more. You're right, we'll be right back. What do you think would help improve our relationship more in the person? Agreed? Agreed? Yeah, because I think I think we're transparent. I think we know how to communicate. We have empathy, kindness, all that kind of stuff. I do think we need to be around each other more. H love, that was the shortest question. Yeah, room for you have room for one more. We need some slumber parties. I think we've been saying that we need some slumber parties with real sleeping pack damas, but not outside because I got a place. No, I got a place for us to go. Think you pajamas, mine treat, We got it somewhere's special. I'm not telling where we're going, goes. I don't want happy to not be in charge of ship. If you are, I'm happy, I will release all responses. Yeah, so oh this is funny. Oh lord, do your best impression of me. Oh this is scary. Oh girl, girl. What I'm saying is is that what I'm not going to do is let that white, because you know everything I am rooted in blackness. Honey, for girl crying the girl, Oh no, baby, oh no, those are all my go to words. I won't even lie that those are all all right? Come on, what should do? Uh? Let me see? Okay, wait wait, wait, hold on. Listen when I tell you my eyes are closed, ladies and gentlemen, because when she really likes something, her eyes closed, especially if it has to do with taste, the warness of my mouth. Listen, y'all wanted to. I don't know it just there was an overflowing abundance of love that came from this cookie. I cannot tell y'all. Just need y'all to taste it. Yes, she will describe ye, this is the one. She's just like and I and I told her, I told them, listen, it's it's your teeth. It's the teeth. It's what it's the teeth, it's I tried to tell her. I kindly said it, but I couldn't take it anymore. I couldn't take it anymore. I mean, the breath, it was, it was that. It was that for me, it was that, and I couldn't. I couldn't ignore it. Why would I? I couldn't, Guys, I'm driving it out because like it because Jill, Jill. The tone of her voice will not change, but here but the voice. Are you sure that you don't have them? Are usual? Your ankles are married? I think maybe you should have you been to the doctor. Take that back? The cookie, the cookie, the cookie was it though? The cookie? Was it? That? That? All of that, all of that is my dog or mother on Joyce. Okay, it's listen, listen, I'm listening to you. I'm listening to you, and I hear Joyce Alice in my dog on ears that's my mother. Wow, but I didn't know that till just now. Thanks so much, old Hose, thanks so much. Lia Is Like what you're gonna do. What you're gonna do bout it? You gotta handle that ship that real though real out like but um, that's one of my favorites. Like no, no, just like what she autum. I don't want to you know, I don't want to say the wrong thing, but wrong thing to listen. I don't want to look. I don't know how to feel us. But I'm just saying you were you get that and then and then there were no black people and then I was done. But you know, I mean whatever, it's okay, it's okay, listen all right, because because you know how you usually cut me off. But you know, peop, when I'm talking, you know, I'm not trying, I ain't saying nothing about it, but I'm just you know, you know exactly exactly we love it. That's at the end of the day, it's like, it's it's what has to happen. I feel like this, I feel like this is very much a drinking game. You know, if you if you grab a couple of your good girlfriends, are good homies or whatever you got going on with you, the people that fun with you, for real, get some drinks and play this game. You know, skin Deep is not giving us any money. They're not. We're not doing a commercial for them right now. We just saw something that that they're doing that seems to truly benefit humanity, and it kind of it reminds us of how vulnerable we are and how important conversations that are not just surface, how important they are. We have to have conversations about ourselves, and we have to talk and listen to our friends, um that love us through love you know, even if it's even if it's like oh damn, you know, it's it's worth the trip because you don't grow if you don't know. Uh, thank you so much, Thank you so much for listening to Jay dot Il the podcast. It's always a pleasure. Take care of y'all. How do you eat an elephant? One by it time? Hey, listeners, it's Amber the producer here. In today's episode, Jill like Yeah and Asia played a card game called the and from the Skin Deep. They used the Friendship deck, but they have decks for several types of relationships, from dating two couples to co workers. Each deck is compromised of a hundred and ninety nine cards with thought provoked questions designed to create a little more space for a lot more openness, honesty, and vulnerability in your relationships. I'll drop the link to the game and the website in the show notes. Hi, if you have comments on something we said in this episode called eight six six, Hey Jill, if you want to add to this conversation, that's eight six six nine five four five five. Don't forget to tell us your name and the episode you're referring to. You might just hear your message on a future episode. Thank you for listening to Jill Scott Presents Jay dot Ill The podcast Ja dot Ill is a production of I Heart Radio. For more podcast from I Heart Radio, visit the I Heard Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.