Trump's Courtroom Siestas, Biden's Cannibal Conundrum, and New Guinea's Sky-Meal StandardsBallot April 24-auphonic

WEBVTT

1
00:00:03.120 --> 00:00:10.640
Calaroga Shark Media from Washington, d
C. Where courtroom naps are the new

2
00:00:10.640 --> 00:00:13.960
political performance art, but at least
you don't have to watch out for cannibals.

3
00:00:14.160 --> 00:00:17.719
This is ballid. First up,
we'll explore the riveting saga of Donald

4
00:00:17.719 --> 00:00:23.039
Trump's courtroom siestas, where his slumbering
visage is drawing comparisons to a Warhol masterpiece.

5
00:00:23.719 --> 00:00:28.039
We'll also delve into the fallout from
Biden's peculiar cannibal comments, which have

6
00:00:28.079 --> 00:00:32.479
the White House scolding reporters for cracking
jokes and the people of Papua New Guinea

7
00:00:32.520 --> 00:00:37.079
setting the record straight on their sky
meal standards. And if that's not enough,

8
00:00:37.759 --> 00:00:41.799
we'll touch on the National Inquirer's role
in burying Trump's scandals and the former

9
00:00:41.840 --> 00:00:48.159
president's valiant struggle to stay awake during
his own trial. At the trial of

10
00:00:48.200 --> 00:00:53.399
Donald Trump, the first witness was
the editor of the National Inquirer. Jordan

11
00:00:53.479 --> 00:00:58.240
Klepper shared that mister Pecker would buy
scandalous stories about Trump and bury them,

12
00:00:58.679 --> 00:01:00.799
and what a good job he did. I can't think of a single Trump

13
00:01:00.880 --> 00:01:06.439
scandal. It was suggested Trump could
get a one thousand dollars fine for violating

14
00:01:06.439 --> 00:01:10.680
a gag order. It was suggested
Trump could get a one thousand dollars fine

15
00:01:10.680 --> 00:01:15.760
for violating a gag order. Daily
show host Ronnie Chang joked, one thousand

16
00:01:15.799 --> 00:01:19.359
dollars that's not gonna stop Trump from
talking. Okay, You've got to deal

17
00:01:19.400 --> 00:01:22.599
with this like any other tantrum.
You've got to give Trump an iPad with

18
00:01:22.640 --> 00:01:26.840
Coco melon on it and let him
zone out. Jimmy Kimmel said he violated

19
00:01:26.840 --> 00:01:30.040
the gag order. During the hearing
about whether he violated the gag order,

20
00:01:30.519 --> 00:01:34.120
Jordan Klepper joked, this is a
complicated issue about balancing rights. Basically,

21
00:01:34.200 --> 00:01:38.159
the prosecution's argument is that a juror
has the right to feel safe while serving

22
00:01:38.200 --> 00:01:42.359
on Donald Trump's jury, while Donald
Trump's argument is that that juror lives at

23
00:01:42.359 --> 00:01:47.239
thirty four West fifty second Street,
and maybe someone should pay that juror a

24
00:01:47.319 --> 00:01:52.000
visit and straighten him out. Trump's
team is complaining that it's unfair to be

25
00:01:52.040 --> 00:01:56.799
cooped up all day. Jordan Klepper
observed, would Trump even want fresh air

26
00:01:56.799 --> 00:02:00.239
and exercise? CBS News described what
it it's like to be in the courtroom,

27
00:02:00.319 --> 00:02:05.760
saying, once Trump walks through the
thick wooden double doors, sometimes setting

28
00:02:05.799 --> 00:02:09.719
a brisk pace, sometimes lumbering,
always stone faced, his demeanor changes.

29
00:02:10.400 --> 00:02:15.639
He's accompanied by a team of lawyers, usually campaign staff too, and of

30
00:02:15.680 --> 00:02:20.000
course secret service agents who move to
the perimeter after Trump takes a seat at

31
00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:27.240
the defense table. Mostly Trump stares
straight ahead at what exactly the computer monitor

32
00:02:27.240 --> 00:02:31.319
he shares with the attorney next to
him, Certainly sometimes, but he seems

33
00:02:31.319 --> 00:02:35.919
to be looking above that, beyond
it, past the bustling judge's clerk,

34
00:02:36.039 --> 00:02:39.280
whose desk gives him a front row
seat second only to merchants. Is he

35
00:02:39.360 --> 00:02:44.319
staring at the wall? The bottom
third is wood paneled, the rest painted

36
00:02:44.400 --> 00:02:47.680
solid white. Also mounted on the
wall across from Trump as a flat screen

37
00:02:47.719 --> 00:02:52.680
television, one of four in the
room at all times. It shows Merchant,

38
00:02:52.719 --> 00:02:55.360
the lawyers, and Trump himself.
The Guardian describes it this way.

39
00:02:57.080 --> 00:03:01.000
His image there is raw, uncut
and unfill altered. Like Andy Warhol's film

40
00:03:01.159 --> 00:03:06.280
Sleep, in which Warhol fixed a
camera on his slumbering lover for six hours,

41
00:03:06.879 --> 00:03:10.039
it's not a Trump rally. The
withering focus, without the introduction of

42
00:03:10.080 --> 00:03:15.120
the thumping music, his emergence from
a dry ice generated cloud of fog,

43
00:03:15.400 --> 00:03:21.120
and the predictably orgasmic reception of frenzied
minions reveals something less than the conquering hero

44
00:03:21.400 --> 00:03:25.240
in a Make America Great Again red
baseball cap, clapping his hands. Day

45
00:03:25.280 --> 00:03:30.759
after day, Trump slumps in his
chair, his eyes narrowing and closing,

46
00:03:30.280 --> 00:03:36.400
his facial features sagging, until he
suddenly jerks to life, once muttering a

47
00:03:36.439 --> 00:03:39.840
seemingly veiled threat to a potential juror
that earned him a rebuke from Judge Juan

48
00:03:39.919 --> 00:03:45.240
Merchant that if he persisted, he
would be in contempt for witness intimidation.

49
00:03:46.120 --> 00:03:51.439
Without self discipline, Trump invites being
disciplined, lacking control, He fails to

50
00:03:51.439 --> 00:03:54.520
control himself time and again. He
falls asleep, appeared to nod off a

51
00:03:54.520 --> 00:03:58.840
few times, his mouth going slack
and his head drooping onto his chest.

52
00:03:59.639 --> 00:04:03.599
Maggie Haberman reported in The New York
Times, lest you think this show is

53
00:04:03.599 --> 00:04:08.360
one sided, I'll move on to
Biden. But let's be real. Did

54
00:04:08.400 --> 00:04:12.840
you really come to this podcast to
hear a thoughtful discussion of Israel and Palestine?

55
00:04:13.080 --> 00:04:15.240
All I have for you is cannibal
jokes, and the White House would

56
00:04:15.279 --> 00:04:19.639
like us to cut that out.
White House Press Secretary Karine Jean Pierre is

57
00:04:19.680 --> 00:04:25.720
scolding reporters for poking fun at the
president's remarks. During a recent press briefing,

58
00:04:26.000 --> 00:04:30.240
Fox News reporter Peter Doucy asked Jean
Pierre why Biden was claiming his uncle

59
00:04:30.319 --> 00:04:32.959
was shot down and eaten by cannibals, adding that is a bad way to

60
00:04:33.040 --> 00:04:38.879
go. Jean Pierre's response, we
should not make jokes about this. I

61
00:04:38.920 --> 00:04:43.839
personally disagree. Some residents of Papua
New Guinea, the present day country near

62
00:04:43.879 --> 00:04:47.240
where Biden's uncle's plane crashed, are
not too thrilled about the president's remarks.

63
00:04:47.920 --> 00:04:53.040
Michael Cabuni, a political science lecturer
at the University of Papua New Guinea,

64
00:04:53.079 --> 00:04:57.399
said, implying that your uncle jumps
out of the plane and somehow we think

65
00:04:57.439 --> 00:05:01.160
it's a good meal is unacceptable.
He added, they wouldn't just eat any

66
00:05:01.199 --> 00:05:06.279
white men that fell from the sky. Annie, So apparently there's a vetting

67
00:05:06.319 --> 00:05:12.240
process for SkyFallen meals in New Guinea. Who knew. Well, that's all

68
00:05:12.279 --> 00:05:15.439
for this episode of Ballot And remember, if you ever find yourself falling from

69
00:05:15.439 --> 00:05:19.160
the sky over New Guinea, just
hope you meet their rigorous meal standards.

70
00:05:19.680 --> 00:05:24.759
Portions of this podcast were created with
the help of Ai and you can't eat

71
00:05:24.800 --> 00:05:28.000
ai at least I don't think you
can. Oh. By the way,

72
00:05:28.319 --> 00:05:31.439
I am guest hosting five daily trivia
questions on Friday. Forgot to tell you

73
00:05:31.720 --> 00:05:32.720
more ballot tomorrow