Nov. 29, 2024

Trump Trolls Biden in YMCA Turkey Video plus RFK on the joys of...checks notes...heroin

Donald Trump released a video so insane you'll think we're kidding.

RFK's heroic claims.

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Show Notes
Transcript

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Callaroga shark media from mar A Lago, where the president

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elect is trolling the current president with weird videos. This

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is ballot, that's right. I don't even need to mention

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parody laws today because you'd swear the actual news is parody.

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Let's hit this So. Donald Trump, you know, the guy

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who just won the presidency and apparently thinks truth. Socialist

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Facebook for people who failed a citizenship test, just posted

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what might be the most unhinged holiday video since your

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uncle tried to deep fry a frozen turkey in his garage.

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Picture This Trump took a scene from National Lampoon's Christmas

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Vacation because nothing says presidential like recycling eighties comedy bits,

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and turned it into his personal fever dream. There's Joe

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Biden getting ready to carve a turkey, surrounded by a

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who's who of Democratic nightmares. We're talking Chuck Schumer, Adam Schiff, AOC,

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Nancy Pelosi, and Ilhan Omar, all sitting there like they're

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at the world's most uncomfortable Thanksgiving dinner. But wait, it

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gets better. Just as Biden's about to cut into the bird,

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Trump and I swear I'm not making this up. Bursts

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out of the turkey like some sort of spray tand

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Jack in the box and starts doing the YMCA dance, Yes,

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the YMCA dance. Because nothing says I'm your next president

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like cosplaying as a disco turkey. The best part ilhan

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Omar's reaction in the video is basically all of us

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watching American politics right now, somehow both horrified and amused

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at the same time. The video has gone viral faster

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than your aunt's political opinions after three glasses of wine,

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with thirty eight million views on x That's right, thirty

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eight million people watched a former and future president pop

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out of poultry like some sort of Mara A Lago

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magic show. And because Trump can't let any holiday pass

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without a greeting card from bizarro World, he dropped a

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Thanksgiving message calling his opponents radical left lunatics who miserably

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failed you know, just the kind of warm holiday wishes

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that really bring the country together. Nothing says I'm ready

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to lead America like dunking on your opponents while they're

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trying to digest their stuffing. Mar A Lago hosted what

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might be the most awkward Thanksgiving dinner since your cousin

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brought their ex to family dinner. Elon Musk showed up

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with his mom, like it's bring your parent to Presidency Day?

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And who else was there? Sylvester Stallone, because apparently nothing

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says traditional American holiday like Rocky Balboa doing the YMCA

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with a billionaire and a president elect. And just when

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you thought this couldn't get any more, Silicon Valley meets

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the Apprentice. Mark Zuckerberg showed up Wednesday for his own

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pre Thanksgiving dinner. You know, the same guy Trump threatened

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to jail earlier this year. But hey, nothing smooths over

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prison threats like some cranberry sauce and small talk about metaverses.

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Zuck who's apparently trying to win most confusing political stance

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twenty twenty four, called Trump badass after an assassination attempt

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and congratulated him on his win, proving that even tech

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billionaires can have the political consistency of a weather vein

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in a tornado. Donald Trump's pick to run Health in

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Human Services, you know, the department responsible for keeping Americans healthy,

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just revealed his own unique study enhancement program from back

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in the day, and let me tell you it wasn't

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exactly drinking more coffee. Rfk Junior recently told podcaster Sean

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Ryan that Heroin, Yes, Heroin, helped him go from bottom

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of his class to top of his class. Apparently this

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was his version of a study group. While most people

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were highlighting textbooks, he was hitting something considerably stronger. But

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here's where it gets even better, And by better, I

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mean more concerning than your doctor's handwriting. The same month

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he's reminiscing about his Heroin fueled academic excellence, he's proposing

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sending people who take adderall to what he calls wellness farms.

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That's right, prescription medica off to the farm with you Heroin. Well,

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that's just alternative studying. These wellness farms sound about as

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voluntary as your grandmother's holiday dinner, with Kennedy suggesting people

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might need to stay there three or four years because

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nothing says wellness like what essentially sounds like a medical

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prison term. Meanwhile, our potential future health chief wants to

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ban fluoride in drinking water because he thinks it's industrial waste.

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This from the guy who earlier told us Heroin helped

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his grades. I guess he's not a fan. Of chemistry,

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unless it's the really exciting kind. Let's look at what

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happened in Juno, Alaska when they banned fluoride in two

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thousand and seven. Spoiler alert, it went about as well

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as trying to brush your teeth with pop rocks. A

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study showed cavity treatment shot up, especially in kids, and

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dentill costs skyrocketed by seventy three percent. That's right, they

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managed to make living in Alaska even more expensive. The

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kicker kids born after the band got hit harder than

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a hockey pupp to the teeth. They needed more dental

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work and more expensive treatments. Turns out removing fluoride from

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water is like removing lifeguards from a beach. Sure you

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can do it, but don't be surprised when things go south.

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Portions of today's program were made with the help of AI.

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None of it was made while on heroin. Don't do heroin,

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and do brush your teeth. That's some solid health advice

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from your pal Mac Davies.