Aug. 13, 2024

Shane Gillis' Trump more fun than Trump PLUS is that JD Vance in Drag?

Show Notes
Transcript

A photo emerged. Sure looks like JD Vance dressed as a woman.

Shane Gillis was in charcater as Trump at the MSG taping of Kill Tony

Joe Biden fell alseep on the beach. So?

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Callaroga Shark media from Washington, DC, where that sure looks

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like jd Vance dressed as a woman. This is ballad,

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that's right, and Joe Biden fell asleep on the beach

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and Shane Gillis's Trump is more fun than actual Trump.

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So let's hit this. Yes, I know Trump was on

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with Elon last night, but why stay up until midnight

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to record your podcast when you can just make the

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leadoff story about jd Vance and drag and what can

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only be described as the plot of a political satire

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gone rogue. An alleged photo of Senator jd Vance dressed

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as a woman in a blonde wig surfaced on Twitter

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over the weekend. The Internet being the Internet, quickly turned

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this into a trending sensation under the hashtag Sofa Luren.

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Yes you heard that correctly, Sofa loor en get it?

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So how did we get here? The image was reportedly

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taken during Vance's time at Yale Law School back in

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twenty twelve, at what appears to have been a Halloween party.

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The photo made its way online via Travis Whitfil, who

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claims to have received it from a friend of a

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friend in a group chat. Whitfil then passed it along

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to podcast host Matt Bernstein, who posted it to Twitter.

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When approached for comment, Vance's camp didn't exactly rush to

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deny the photo's authenticity, instead opting for the classic non comment.

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Of course, a normal person would just say, yeah, it's

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a Halloween costume. Did I go as Elvira one year?

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I did? There's picks in everything? Is cala rogus shark

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media going to fire me over it? No, because I

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work weekends, I'm untouchable. I may have even had fifteen

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beers and banged a couch that year. Go ahead make

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fun of me. Whether or not the photo is authentic,

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It's clear that Vance's opponents aren't going to let this

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one go quietly. And as for the hashtag sofa Lauren, well,

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it's proof that in politics sometimes the strangest things can

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grab the spotlight, even a decade old wig in a

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couch that never was. And sure I could have stayed

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up until midnight to tell you what the hell Elon

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and Trump talked about, or hear me out. I could

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just play this clip of Shane Gillis as Trump making

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fun of Joe Rogan endorsing RFK.

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I think a Tavius, New York is probably the best.

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And I will say this. The reason I'm saying this

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is we don't have absolute cowards like little Joe Rogan

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telling us what to do up in Little Joe he

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came in, he said he wants to endorse RFK Junior.

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Can you believe this? Joe Rogan is an absolute joke.

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If I ever saw him, I would whoop his pitch ass.

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What a coward. Joe Rogan, complete coward and it's frankly,

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he's an embarrassment to this country.

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This was the Kill Tony Show live at Madison Square Garden.

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We took a few naughty words out tapped the break Shane,

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and then Joe Rogan showed up. Shane Jill A. Trump said, what.

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An amazing American this man is. Joe Logan, What an

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true Matrian, great man. I would never say anything negative

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about this name order guy, a guy. Everybody agrees this

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is one of the best guys. We talked about. We say, Austin, Austin,

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Texas is great. Joe Rogan is great. Frankly, Joe Rogan

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is the best and everyone knows it. And I love RMK.

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Who doesn't love rm K is a great.

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Given, Here's a plot twist that even a Hollywood screenwriter

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might hesitate to draft. Donald Trump's campaign team recently found

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themselves hitching a ride on a gulf Stream jet formerly

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owned by none other than Jeffrey Epstein. Yes, you heard

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that right, the same Epstein, whose resume includes being a

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convicted sex offender and the most infamous Palm Beach neighbor

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you wouldn't want to have. Here's how it went down.

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Trump was cruising a on his private jet heading to Bozeman,

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Montana for one of his rallies, when surprised the plane

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had some mechanical issues and had to make an unexpected

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pitstop in Billings. Needing to get to his rally on time.

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Because the show must go on, right, Trump and his

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staff hopped on a small charter plane to Bozeman, but

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the next day the campaign decided to upgrade to a

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larger gulf Stream jet, which seemed like a smooth move

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until they found out who used to own it. Turns

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out this wasn't just any golf Stream. This particular plane

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had a let's say, asterisk colorful asterisk history. The serial

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number matched one of the planes that belonged to Jeffrey Epstein,

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the late financier whose name is synonymous with scandal. The

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Trump campaign quickly put out a statement saying they had

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no awareness of the plane's previous owner, insisting that the

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charter was arranged by a vendor they frequently use. Because

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you know nothing says we're focused on the issues, quite

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like accidentally boording the ghost of Scandal's past. The campaign

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claims they learned about the Epste connection the same way

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the rest of us did through the media. Of course

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they did. It's not like the plane came with a

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disclaimer asterisk warning previous owner was Jeffrey Epstein. Use at

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your own risk. In order to keep my job, I

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have to promote a new podcast called five Minutes of Gratitude.

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In a world that often moves too fast, where we're

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constantly chasing the next big thing, it's easy to overlook

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the simple joys and blessings in our lives. But what

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if we could change that? What if we could transform

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our outlook in just five minutes a day. Welcome to

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five Minutes of Gratitude, a podcast that invites you to pause, reflect,

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and appreciate the richness of life around you. Five Minutes

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of gratitude. I'll tell you what I'm grateful for. My

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ex girlfriend Norma hasn't texted me yet today, but don't worry,

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she will fifty times. Are you talking to Kate? You

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better not be talking to Kate. Well, Norma, guess who

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I had dinner with Saturday? Stop listening to my podcast.

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A two minute, nineteen second clip of Joe Biden taking

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a nap on the beach went viral. I don't get

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the issue. Isn't that the whole idea of the beach?

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Throw on your air pods, listen to your favorite snarky

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political podcast, and fall asleep halfway through it. That's what

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I was trying to do every weekend in July until

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people started shooting at Trump and Joe decided to stop

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running for reelection at one forty six pm on a

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Sunday instead of waiting until Monday like a civilized person.

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John Oliver took aim at Donald Trump's latest linguistic misadventure.

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In a series of social media posts, Trump repeatedly referred

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to his opponent, Vice President Kamala Harris as Kamabla, Yes, kamabla,

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and as if that wasn't confusing enough, Trump's campaign spokesperson

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Stephen Chung decided to whip out a VENN diagram to

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explain the connection between Comma and Blah. Spoiler alert, it

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didn't go well. Oliver, being the chart officionado he is,

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couldn't resist pointing out that Chung's diagram not only failed

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to explain anything, it's not how ven diagrams work. Q

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Oliver's delightfully British exasperation as he declared not to be

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a total chart pitch, but I am what I am.

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After giving the audience a quick lesson on what ven

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diagrams are actually for hint, it's not whatever Chung thought

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he was doing, Oliver presented a few examples for the

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diagram challenged. He kicked things off with a classic a

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VEN diagram where one circle is dolphins, another is sharks.

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Simple right, But Oliver didn't stop there. He took a

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more creative turn with a VEN diagram that features one

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circle labeled John Oliver and another labeled Big Bird, with

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the overlap being Squawk's educational lessons on television. Now that's

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a VEN diagram that makes sense. Then, in true Oliver fashion,

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he went for the absurd a diagram with Jenna Ortega

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in one circle and pepe le pew in the other,

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with the overlap being can't say where they were on

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nine to elevens. Sure it doesn't make any sense, but

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that's the point. Unlike Chung's nonsense, portions of Today's podcast

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were made with the help of AI. Just like those

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photos of me dressed like Elvira where it looks like

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I'm blacked out, faced down on a couch, fake news. Look,

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if Elon and Trump said anything interesting, maybe I'll drop

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a bonus episode. Otherwise it can wait until tomorrow. Like

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the Isaac Hayes story I cut from today's show for length.

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How's that for a tease.