Dec. 12, 2024

Nobel vs. RFK: Scientists Say 'No Way,' Trump Says 'You're Hired

Show Notes
Transcript

77 Nobel laureates write a strongly-worded letter opposing RFK Jr.'s nomination as health secretary, because apparently winning a Nobel Prize makes you an "elite"; Trump's perfume line gets an unwitting endorsement from Jill Biden; The Biden-Harris relationship gets colder than a December dip in the Potomac; and the President admits Trump outsmarted him by... signing his name on checks

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Caalarogu Shark media.

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From Washington, d C. Where a cologne called Fight just

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isn't a good idea.

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This is ballot that's right on the program today. Seventy

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seven Nobel Laureates say no to RFK. Trump is selling

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cologne and somehow Biden is still the president.

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Let's hit this well, folks.

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Looks like Trump's nominee for HHS secretary just got a

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strongly worded letter from the we actually know what we're

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talking about club. Seventy seven Nobel Laureates are saying thanks,

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but no, thanks to RFK Junior. Faster than you can

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say peer reviewed research only seventy seven Americans are sick

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and tired of elites telling them what to do, because apparently,

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when it comes to public health, who needs Nobel laureates

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when you can have a guy who thinks fluoride is

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a government plot. The Nobel Laureates are basically saying this

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is like putting an arsonist in charge of the fire department,

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but in much fancier academic language. Meanwhile, Drew Weissman, who

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helped create the mRNA COVID vaccine, signed this letter. I'm

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guessing his Nobel Prize isn't hanging on Kennedy's Christmas card list.

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This year, Trump is turning international diplomacy into his personal

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open mic night. Folks, remember when politics was boring, Well,

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forget that. We're now living in an era where the

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president elect is basically a professional Internet.

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Troll with nuclear codes.

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Trump's latest hit promoting his new fragrance line using a

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photo with Jill Biden at Notre Dame Cathedral because nothing

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says sacred moment of architectural restoration like hawking perfume. The

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White House's response complete silence, probably because they're still processing

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that this is actually real life.

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So picture this.

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Trump's at the cathedral, you know, that sacred place of worship,

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and he's sitting there thinking, you know what, this moment

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needs a perfume line, and not just any perfume line.

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He's using a photo with Jill Biden to sell it.

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Talk about an unexpected collab that nobody asked for. He's

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calling it fight, Fight, Fight, because nothing says sophisticated fragrance

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like repeating the word fight three times. You too can

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smell like, well, we don't actually know what it smells like.

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The website just says it captures the essence of success

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and determination. So basically it's ode vague promises and get this,

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there's a buy one, get one half off deal, which

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is a totally normal for a luxury fragrance. Nothing says

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high end perfume like the same pricing strategy as your

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local mattress store. The best part, the fine print says

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it's not political and has nothing to do with any

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political campaign, right because nothing says non political like using

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a photo from a cathedral reopening to sell cologne. I'm

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sure Jill Biden was thrilled to find out she's now

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an unwitting fragrance influencer. When Trudeau rushed down to Florida

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to discuss Trump's threatened twenty five percent tax on Canadian goods,

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Trump casually suggested making Canada the fifty first state. Now

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he's calling Trudeau Governor Justin Trudeau of the Great State

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of Canada. Canadian officials are basically saying, this feels like

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a South Park episode, and honestly, that might be an

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insult to South Park. And let's not forget Thanksgiving, where

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Trump shared a video of himself bursting out of a

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turkey like some sort of holiday horror movie. Dancing to YMCA,

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which is totally not a gay anthem. While Biden and

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company looked on his team's defense, Trump's just relatable and

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everyone else needs to get a sense of humor. Meanwhile,

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Canada's response is basically, we're trying to ignore his truth

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social posts like your aunt's Facebook conspiracy theories. Former Trudeau

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advisor Gerald Buttz revealed Trump's been pitching this whole fifty

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first state thing since his first term. Oh god, he

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said at least a half dozen times, which really makes

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you wonder is this diplomacy or just the world's most

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expensive comedy tour. Joe Biden remember him? Don't worry, he

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doesn't either. Somehow he's still the president. The president's admitting

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that not putting his name on those COVID checks was

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about as smart as trying to eat soup with a fork.

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Here's Biden basically saying, you know what Trump got right branding?

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Who knew people would remember free money more if you

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put your name on it. Talk about a face palm

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moment for Team Biden. Trump's signature was basically the world's

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most expensive autograph, and apparently it worked. But the real

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kicker is Biden's message to Trump about inheriting the strongest

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economy in modern history. It's like watching someone hand over

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the keys to a ferrari while saying, don't.

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You dare put racing stripes on it?

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Meanwhile, it looks like we've got more awkward vibes at

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the Kennedy Center than a middle school dance.

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Picture this.

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Kamala Harris is standing there, clapping like she's trying to

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catch mosquitoes, beaming brighter than the theater lights, while the

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bidens breeze past her like she's an over enthusiastic seat filler.

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And remember this is coming right after Harris lost the

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election to Trump last month, talk about adding ice to

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the injury. The bidens walked right past her with the

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kind of enthusiasm you'd show for a telemarketer calling during dinner.

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Poor second gentleman Doug m Hoff was probably wishing he

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could disappear into a seat cushion. Standing there next to

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his wife while she's getting the presidential cold shoulder. That's

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the kind of secondhand embarrassment that makes you want to

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watch c Span with.

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Your eyes closed.

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I guess being a lame duck president means you don't

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have to worry about office party etiquette anymore, though you'd

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think after working together for four years they could at

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least manage.

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A hey, thanks for the applause.

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Not Maybe they were just really focused on getting to

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their seats before the show started. Or maybe this is

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just what happens when your VP ticket loses to the

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guy who sells one hundred and ninety nine dollars cologne

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called Fight Fight Fight. Portions of today's program were made

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with the help of AI, the Great State of Canada,

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and seventy seven Nobel Laureates.