July 1, 2025

Killer Bees Spread Across America, Ivanka Trump's Soviet Weapons Resort, Jim Morrison Bust Recovered

Show Notes
Transcript

Africanized killer bees are conquering thirteen states and holding grudges against humans, Ivanka Trump and Jared Kushner invest one point four billion dollars to turn a Soviet weapons base into a luxury Albanian resort, and Paris police finally recover Jim Morrison's stolen grave bust after nearly four decades

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Kalaruga shark media from Albania, where luxury and weapons go

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hand in hand.

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This is ballot, that's right, But at least they don't

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have any killer bees.

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Let's hit this.

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I'm Patrick Guttfield, and Avanka Trump and Jared Kushner are

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investing one point four billion dollars to turn an abandoned

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Soviet weapons base in Albania into a luxury resort.

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Now.

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I don't know about you, but when I think romantic getaway,

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the first thing that comes to mind is definitely a

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former weapons facility. Nothing sets the mood quite like honey.

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Let's book that place where they used to store nuclear warheads.

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The resort slogan is probably going to be come for

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the Mediterranean views. Stay because the radiation gave you superpowers,

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and they're calling it an extraordinary retreat for the wealthy

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and privileged. Oh good, because what the world really needs

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right now is another place where rich people can isolate

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themselves from reality.

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Although, to be fair, if you can afford to vacation.

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At a former Soviet weapons base, you're probably already pretty

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detached from how normal people live. The timing here is

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just chef's kiss perfect. The Albanian government gave preliminary approval

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in January. That's just days before Ivanka's dad got inaugurated

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for his second term.

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What a remarkable coincidence.

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I'm sure the fact that her father is now actively

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working with foreign governments had absolutely nothing to do with

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this approval. The Albanian officials were probably just really impressed

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by their PowerPoint presentation. Kushner and the Albanian government both

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insist there's no conflict of interest here, right, And I'm

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sure when the inspector showed up to evaluate the project,

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they didn't even notice the make Albania Great Again had

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he was wearing. But you have to admire the ambition.

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Most people look at an abandoned weapons facility and think

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environmental has These two look at it and think spa weekend.

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They're probably planning to turn the old missile silos into

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infinity pools. Welcome to our underground bunker suites. Bulletproof walls

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included at no extra charge. This is one of several

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projects involving Trump family members and foreign governments at this point.

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The Trump family international business ventures are like a global

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scavenger hunt, except instead of finding items, they're finding countries.

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Willing to approve their real estate deals. So, after nearly

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four decades, Paris police have finally recovered the bust of

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Jim Morrison that was stolen from his grave back in

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nineteen eighty eight. The three hundred pounds sculpture by Croatian

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artist Laden mccoulin was discovered during an unrelated financial corruption investigation,

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which raises so many questions. I don't even know where

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to start. First off, who steals a three hundred pound

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bust from a cemetery. That's not exactly a grab and

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go operation. You need a plan, probably a truck and

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definitely some very committed friends. Hey want to help me

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commit a felony that'll require us renting a U haul.

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The bust was installed at par Lachez Cemetery in nineteen

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eighty one for the tenth anniversary of Morrison's death. For

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those keeping track, Morrison died at twenty seven in a

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Paris bathtub in nineteen seventy one, joining that unfortunate club

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of rock stars who couldn't make it to twenty eight. Now,

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a Paris tour guide says putting the bust back would

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attract so many Morrison fans that the cemetery couldn't handle

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the crowds, which is saying something considering par Laches is

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already home to Oscar Wilde, Marcel Proust, and Edith Piaff. Apparently,

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dead rock stars draw bigger crowds than dead writers.

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Who could have.

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Predicted that the theft happened during Morrison's cultural renaissance in

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the late eighties, right before the Oliver Stone movie The

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Doors came out in nineteen ninety one, perfect timing. Really

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nothing says cultural moment quite like grave robbing. One visitor

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who saw the grave forty years ago remembers people parting there, smoking,

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dancing music the whole thing. She brought strawberries to share

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with everyone, because nothing says honoring a dead poet quite

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like turning his final resting place into a tailgate party

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with fruit snacks. Morrison co founded The Doors in Los

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Angeles in nineteen sixty five, burned bride and brief, then

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moved to Paris, where he died under mysterious circumstances. No

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autopsy was required by French law, which is only added

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to the decades of speculation and mystique surrounding his death.

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So now the question is will they put the bust back,

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and if they do, will they need crowd control for

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a cemetery only in Paris would recovering stolen grave art

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become a potential tourism crisis. Killer bees are spreading across America,

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and they're apparently holding grudges. These Africanized honey bees have

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now conquered thirteen states and are slowly working their way north,

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presumably checking off items on their terrify humans to do list.

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In just the past three months, these bees have managed

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to kill a man mowing his lawn, send three people

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to the hospital, chase hikers for a full mile, and

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murder three horses with thousands of stinks. The horse owner

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said the bees didn't give up, which sounds less like

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insect behavior and more like a really persistent.

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Door to door salesman.

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These bees will follow their victims for up to a mile,

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even chasing cars and trucks. They're basically the terminator of

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the insect world. Come with me if you want to

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live has become run away if you want to live,

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and also maybe consider moving to Alaska. Scientists explain that

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this aggressive behavior is actually a defense mechanism, which is

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the academic way of saying they're not trying to be jerks,

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they're just really really good at it. Regular honey bees

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might send out five to ten scouts when disturbed. Africanized

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bees send out fifty to one hundred, which is the

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difference between getting a polite knock on your door and

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having the entire extended family show up for an intervention.

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It's like the Queen Bee is some maniac who wants

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to make bees great again. These bees are so sensitive

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to threats that they'll attack if you're mowing your lawns

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several houses away, which is to distract you from whatever

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went down on bee sting Island. The lethal dose for

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beastings is calculated at about nine stings per pound of

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body weight, So if you weigh one hundred and fifty pounds,

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half the people who get thirteen hundred and fifty stings

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might die with regular bees. That's highly unlikely with killer bees.

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That's apparently tuesday. One man in Ohio survived twenty thousand

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beastings in twenty twenty two, but only after being put

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in a medically induced coma. Twenty thousand stings. That's not

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an attack. That's a full scale military operation with air support.

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The truly frustrating part. These bees exist because of a

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scientific oops moment. Back in nineteen fifty six, a Brazilian

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geneticist was trying to create better honey bees by breeding

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African bees with European ones. A year later, twenty six

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Africanized queen bees were accidentally released into a nearby forest.

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That's not an accident, that's the origin story for every

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monster movie ever made. If you encounter these bees, experts

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recommend running away as fast as possible. Don't jump in water,

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don't swat at them, Just run, pull your shirt over

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your nose and mouth, and sprint like you're being chased

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by well killer bees. Portions of today's show were made

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with the help of AI and bees