Sept. 24, 2025

Escalator-gate, Traffic Diplomacy, aJimmy Kimmel's Return

Show Notes
Transcript

Patrick Gutfield breaks down the week's wildest political moments: Jimmy Kimmel returns from suspension with a masterclass in not-really-apologizing, Emmanuel Macron calls Trump to complain about New York traffic (and tries to solve Gaza while he's at it), Trump demands a federal investigation into a malfunctioning UN escalator, and Zelensky discovers the secret to better US relations is Putin's constant lying. Plus, why Trump's pivot on Ukraine has everyone from France to Fox News doing double takes.

WEBVTT

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Callaroga Shark Media from Los Angeles, where you can go

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ahead and subscribe to Hulu. This is ballad. That's right.

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Jimmy Kimmel is back, so let's hit this. I'm Patrick

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Gutfield and Jimmy Kimmel returned from his Disney suspension Tuesday night.

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He struck that perfect tone of I'm sorry you were offended,

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without actually saying he was wrong about anything. The whole

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mess started when Kimmel made some clumsy remarks about Charlie

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Kirk's death, connecting the shooting to the Maga gang and

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joking that Trump's reaction was like how a four year

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old mourns a goldfish. Disney yanked him off the air

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faster than a parent grabbing the remote during an inappropriate

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commercial Tuesday night, Kimmel got choked up, saying it was

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never my intention to make light of the murder of

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a young man. He made it clear that Trump wasn't

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going to scare him into submission. This show is not important,

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he said. What is important is that we get to

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live in a country that allows us to have a

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show like this. Trump being Trump, had already posted that

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Kimmel puts ABC in Jeopardy and called him a major

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illegal campaign contribution. Then he added this gem, last time

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I went after them, they gave me sixteen million dollars.

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This one sounds even more lucrative. That's referring to when

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Disney settled a defamation case rather than fight it. Trump's

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basically treating media lawsuits like a side hustle. At this point,

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Kimmel fired back by pointing out that Trump's attacks actually

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boosted his ratings. He tried his best to cancel me. Instead,

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he forced millions of people to watch the show. That backfired.

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Bigley then came the kicker. He might have to release

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the Epstein files to distract us from this. Now, that's

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a very specific way to change the subject. The show

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featured Robert de Niro playing the new FCC chairman in

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a sketch about suppressing free speech. De Niro explained the

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new pricing structure. You want to say something nice about

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the president's beautiful, thick yellow hair, that's free. But if

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you want to do a joke like he's so fat

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he needs two seats on the Epstein jet, that's going

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to cost you a couple of fingers, maybe a tooth.

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Kimmel also took shots at Disney, saying I was not

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happy when they pulled me off the air. I did

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not agree with that decision, which is a polite way

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of saying my own network threw me under the bus.

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So President Zelenski sat down with Fox News and basically said,

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you know what, Trump and I are getting along better now,

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which is Ukrainian for he stopped yelling at me in

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the Oval office. Apparently Trump had a complete one eighty

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on Ukraine just last month. He was all forgiving pootin

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some land as a peace offering, kind of like when

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your neighbor's dog keeps pooping on your lawn, so you

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just give him half your yard. But now Trump's posting

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on truth social saying Ukraine should get all their territory back.

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That's quite the pivot. The Ukrainian president told Brett Bayer

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he was surprised by Trump's shift. Surprised that's diplomatic speak

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for what the hell happened. Emmanuel Macron was so excited

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about Trump's new position he highlighted it during his UN speech.

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When the French president is using your quotes as talking points,

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you know you've made an impression. That's like having your

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tweet get retweeted by your ex unexpected, but you'll take it.

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Speaking of Macron, he just redefined diplomatic protocol by calling

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Trump to complain about New York traffic. Most world leaders

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use the hotline between nations to discuss nuclear weapons or

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trade wars. Macron used it to vent about being stuck

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behind a police barriccagent. After giving his un speech Monday night,

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the French president found himself trapped behind barriers trying to

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get to his country's mission. Instead of doing what normal

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people do, which is sit there and suffer in silence

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or tweet angrily, Macran decided this was the perfect time

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to ring up the White House. How are you, he

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says into his phone, caught on camera, Guess what I'm

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waiting in the street because everything is frozen for you.

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That's right. He called the President of the United States

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to tell him his motor Kate was causing traffic problems.

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That takes a special kind of confidence. But Macron being Macron,

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he tried to turn his traffic complaint into a Gaza

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peace negotiation. I would love this weekend to have a

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short discussion with Kettar and you on the situation in Gaza.

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Only the French president could pivot from New York City

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traffic sucks to let solve Middle East peace this weekend.

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The police officers looked mortified having to block a world leader.

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One of them kept apologizing, I'm sorry, President, I'm really sorry.

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It's just that everything's frozen right now. Macron joked about

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wanting to negotiate his way through, which is in New York,

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is going to take a well placed twenty. Then Macron

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really went for it, telling French TV that if Trump

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wants his Nobel Peace Prize, he needs to stop the

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war in Gaza. There is one person who can do

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something about it, and that is the US president, he said,

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pointing out that America supplies the weapons being used while

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France doesn't. It's international diplomacy meets road rage counseling. When

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President Trump went to address the UN General Assembly Tuesday,

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apparently the only thing that stopped working faster than international

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diplomacy was the escalator. The moment Trump and Milania stepped on,

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it just stopped, which is either the world's most specific

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technical malfunction or the escalator has opinions about foreign policy.

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The video is everywhere online. Trump steps on escalator says nope,

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and suddenly the leader of the Free world is looking

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around like he's waiting for tech support. After a few

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awkward moments, Milania just starts walking up the stairs, which

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honestly might be the most relatable thing that's happened at

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the UN in decades. We've all been there. Something breaks,

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You stand there fused for a second, then you just

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deal with it. Trump being Trump, he complained about it

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multiple times during his actual speech to world leaders. All

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I got from the United Nations was an escalator on

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the way up that stopped right in the middle. That's right.

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He used his time addressing the global community to air

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his grievances about vertical transportation. He also said Milania would

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have fallen if she wasn't in great shape, which is

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a weird flex, but okay, my wife has excellent escalator reflexes.

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Isn't typically presidential bragging material, but here we are. The

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UN spokesman Stephan A. Dujarik explained that a White House

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videographer walking backward up the escalator probably triggered a safety mechanism,

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so the escalator stopped not because of some international conspiracy,

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but because someone was filming while moonwalking. The escalator's safety

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system kicked in to prevent accidents, which is ironic since

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it nearly caused one. But naturally this became grounds for

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investigation and retribution. White House Press Secretary Caroline Levi posted

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on x demanding that if someone intentionally stopped the escalator,

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they need to be fired and investigated immediately. Yes, let's

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launch a federal investigation into escalator gate. I'm sure there's

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a task force forming as we speak, and they happen

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to be staying at some Trump owned property, so we

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can double bill the government. A technician reset the escalator

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as soon as everyone walked upstairs, which probably took all

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of thirty seconds. Portions of today's show were made with

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the help of AI