March 5, 2025

CHAOS IN CONGRESS: Rep PHYSICALLY REMOVED As Trump Claims 'We're Taking Back Panama Canal!' 😱"

Show Notes
Transcript

Explosive scenes at Trump's address to Congress! Watch as Democratic Rep. Al Green gets DRAGGED from the chamber shouting "YOU HAVE NO MANDATE!" while Republicans chant "USA!" Plus, Elon Musk calls Social Security "the biggest Ponzi scheme of all time" as Trump announces plans to seize foreign territories. The egg crisis NO ONE is talking about and why Democrats are storming out wearing SECRET messages on their shirts! You won't BELIEVE what happened when Trump mentioned Ukraine

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Callaroga Shark media.

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From Washington, d C, where the House of Representatives now

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doubles as an open mic night. This is ballot, that's right?

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Is Trump still speaking? I fell asleep at ten thirty.

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Let's hit this. Trump gave his first joint address to

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Congress last night, and boy was it a doozy. The

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longest joint session speech.

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In US history.

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It's like when your uncle starts telling you about his

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fishing trip and suddenly it's three hours later and you're

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still hearing about the one that got away. Trump began

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by declaring six weeks ago, when I started this speech,

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I mean I proclaim the dawn of the golden age

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of America, which is exactly what I say every morning

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when I finally find my car keys, the dawn of

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a golden age of me getting to work on time.

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He bragged about signing nearly one hundred executive orders and

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taking more than four hundred executive actions. That's more action

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than ad Jason Statha movie marathon. He's signing paper like

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he's afraid they might go extinct. Trump promised to lower

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egg prices after blaming Biden for letting them get out

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of control. Meanwhile, the Agriculture Department says egg prices could

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rise by more than forty percent this year. Nothing says

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I've got this under control, like prices going up by

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almost half. The State of the Union address turned into

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a WWE SmackDown last night when Democratic Representative Al Green

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decided to stand up and shout you have no mandate

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at Trump. It was like when someone's uncle gets too

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passionate during Thanksgiving dinner, except this uncle has been in

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Congress since two thousand and five. The Republicans immediately started

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chanting USA, USA, because nothing says we're having a mature

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political discussion, like breaking into.

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Soccer chants in the middle of Congress.

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I haven't seen that much patriotic shouting since the Olympics,

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or whenever someone suggests maybe healthcare shouldn't bankrupt people. House

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speaker Mike Johnson tried to restore order, but Green.

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Wasn't having it.

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He kept yelling, you have no mandate to cut medicaid,

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as if Trump was going to say, oh, good point.

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I hadn't considered that. Let me rewrite my speech real quick.

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So Johnson had the Sergeant at Arms escort Green out,

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and Republicans stood up and cheered shouting get out. It

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was basically a high school cafeteria, but with older people

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in much more expensive suits. Green wasn't alone in his protest.

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Other Democrats were shouting not true and those are lies.

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Throughout the speech, Representative gil Cisnaros yelled talk about the

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four hundred million to Tesla, while others held up signs

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saying musk steals. Nothing says political discourse like props and shouting.

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Several Democrats walked out during the speech, including Bernie Sanders,

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who probably muttered something about millionaires and billionaires on his

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way to the exit. Some were wearing shirts with resist

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on the back, which is a bold.

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Fashion choice for the state of the Union.

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I'm sure c SPAN's ratings skyrocketed with all this political theater.

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The one thing Democrats did applaud when Trump mentioned financial

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aid for Ukraine. It was the one moment of bipartisan agreement,

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proving that nothing brings Americans together like spending money in

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other countries.

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Now that's unity.

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As Trump gave his speech to Congress last night, and

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at one point he proudly declared the days of rule

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by unelected bureaucrats are over, and the Democrats just lost it.

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Open laughter in the chamber. I mean, this is coming

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from the guy who put elon Musk. You know, that

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unelected guy who runs approximately seventeen companies before breakfast, in

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charge of dismantling the government. It's like hiring a fox

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to guard the henhouse, except the fox also owns Twitter

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and keeps posting memes about the chickens. This whole setup

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has Musk making decisions about billions of dollars that Congress

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allocated and affecting millions of federal workers. It's like when

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I reorganized my friend's kitchen without asking and through all

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his spices because I decided they were inefficient. Except in

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this case, the kitchen is the entire federal government.

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The irony was.

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So thick you could cut it with one of those

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Space Force ceremonial swords.

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Trump keeps trying to make happen.

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Democrats couldn't help but laugh, which is the first time

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they've smiled since November. Talk about finding joy in unexpected places.

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It's like Trump stood up there and said, no more

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guys with a weird hair giving speeches.

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That's not just irony.

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That's irony with a cherry on top and sprinkles a

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cognitive dissonance. Trump announced We're reclaiming the Panama Canal. That's right,

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A Hong Kong company is selling its stake in two

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Panama Canal ports to American and Swiss investors for twenty

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two point eight billion dollars. Trump went full real estate

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mogul in his address to Congress, saying, my administration will

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be reclaiming the Panama Canal, and.

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We've already started doing it.

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You know how when you're a kid and you give

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away your toy, then years later you see someone else

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playing with it and suddenly you need it back. That's

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basically America with the Panama Canal, right now. We built

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this thing in nineteen fourteen, gave it to Panama in

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nineteen ninety nine, and now Trump's acting like he found

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out his ex is dating someone new. We didn't give

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it to China. We gave it to Panama, and we're

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taking it back. I mean, who among us hasn't wanted

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to reclaim international waterways after a messy breakup. Meanwhile, China's

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over there like we don't even run the canal. Their

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spokesperson literally had to clarify they've never been involved in

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the management or operation of the canal, which is exactly

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what someone who secretly controls a canal would say, or

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you know, someone who actually doesn't control a canal. The

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company selling at steak insists this is purely commercial and

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wholly unrelated to recent political news. Right, just like how

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my sudden interest in Cardio has nothing to do with

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the fact that I ate an entire pizza last night.

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The funniest part, the canal itself is actually run by Panama.

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The ports just handle cargo, so.

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Trump is essentially taking credit for buying the parking lots

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outside the stadium.

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And calling it reclaiming the Super Bowl.

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Portions of today's show were made with the help of

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ai Al Green and demo carts holding up ping pong paddles. Yes,

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I said demo carts. That's what the script says. I

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just read what they tell me.