July 21, 2024
Biden Drops Out! Joe Biden will not seek re-election
In a statement, the President said “I believe it is in the best interest of my party and the country for me to stand down and to focus solely on fulfilling my duties as President for the remainder of my term,”
For an ad-free version of the podcast...
In a statement, the President said “I believe it is in the best interest of my party and the country for me to stand down and to focus solely on fulfilling my duties as President for the remainder of my term,”
For an ad-free version of the podcast become a premium subscriber. Details at caloroga.com/plus or on Apple Podcasts click on the banner that says Uninterrupted Listening.
WEBVTT
1
00:00:03.120 --> 00:00:09.439
Calarogu Shark Media from poolside, where
we told you there was no way Biden
2
00:00:09.480 --> 00:00:12.400
would let us have a day off. This is ballot. Did I call
3
00:00:12.439 --> 00:00:16.239
it on Yesterday's show or did I
call it check Saturday's episode where I predicted
4
00:00:16.239 --> 00:00:21.079
this? Anyway, Biden isn't running. Let's hit this seriously, Joe,
5
00:00:21.199 --> 00:00:24.199
I was literally in the pool when
the news broke, and I'm still wet
6
00:00:24.239 --> 00:00:28.800
and not even wearing a shirt anyway. In a statement, Joe Biden said,
7
00:00:29.320 --> 00:00:32.280
I believe it is in the best
interest of my party and the country
8
00:00:32.479 --> 00:00:36.479
for me to stand down and to
focus solely on fulfilling my duties as president
9
00:00:36.640 --> 00:00:40.159
for the reminder of my term.
Wait did he say reminder or is there
10
00:00:40.159 --> 00:00:42.920
a typo in my script? It
kind of belies the point, doesn't it.
11
00:00:43.560 --> 00:00:47.359
Biden said he wants to focus on
fulfilling my duties as president for the
12
00:00:47.399 --> 00:00:52.640
remainder of my term, because apparently
running for reelection while being president is like
13
00:00:52.719 --> 00:00:57.200
trying to text and drive. It's
just not safe for anyone involved. This
14
00:00:57.320 --> 00:01:00.679
leaves the Democrats in a pickle bigger
than the one you'd find at a county
15
00:01:00.719 --> 00:01:04.200
fair. They're scrambling faster than a
squirrel on a bird feeder to find a
16
00:01:04.239 --> 00:01:10.920
new candidate. It's like political musical
chairs, but the music stopped and everyone's
17
00:01:10.959 --> 00:01:15.840
still looking for a seat. Vice
President Kamala Harris might step up, but
18
00:01:15.920 --> 00:01:19.719
her approval ratings are about as high
as my enthusiasm for doing taxes. It's
19
00:01:19.760 --> 00:01:26.560
like choosing between lukewarm coffee and day
old tea. Neither option is particularly exciting.
20
00:01:26.079 --> 00:01:30.719
The DNC is now facing a task
more challenging than explaining TikTok to your
21
00:01:30.760 --> 00:01:37.120
grandparents. They've got to find a
new nominee faster than you can say constitutional
22
00:01:37.159 --> 00:01:41.239
crisis. It's like trying to plan
a wedding in a week, but instead
23
00:01:41.239 --> 00:01:46.239
of I do someone has to say
I'll run the country. Meanwhile, Trump
24
00:01:46.280 --> 00:01:49.879
is probably grinning wider than a chesh
or cat that just won the lottery.
25
00:01:49.599 --> 00:01:55.560
He's gone from facing his old nemesis
to potentially squaring off against a mystery opponent.
26
00:01:56.120 --> 00:01:59.519
It's like showing up for a rematch
only to find out your opponent got
27
00:01:59.599 --> 00:02:02.959
stuck in traffic. So buckle up, America. This election just went from
28
00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:07.640
a predictable rerun to a reality show
where even the producers don't know what's going
29
00:02:07.640 --> 00:02:10.639
to happen next. May the odds
be ever in our favor, and may
30
00:02:10.680 --> 00:02:15.159
someone remember where we put that torch
Biden supposed to pass. I bet Harris
31
00:02:15.199 --> 00:02:19.599
is feeling more mixed emotions than a
kid who just found out schools canceled.
32
00:02:20.319 --> 00:02:24.080
But it's because the building burned down. On one hand, she's probably thinking
33
00:02:24.360 --> 00:02:28.919
it's my time to shine. On
the other hand, it's more like,
34
00:02:29.479 --> 00:02:34.120
oh crud, now I actually have
to do this. Sources say Harris immediately
35
00:02:34.120 --> 00:02:38.000
called her staff for an emergency meeting, and by staff, I mean the
36
00:02:38.039 --> 00:02:42.360
three interns who haven't quit yet.
But let's be real, Harris is probably
37
00:02:42.400 --> 00:02:45.879
feeling like she just inherited a car
with two hundred thousand miles on it and
38
00:02:45.919 --> 00:02:49.919
a check engine light that's been on
since twenty twenty one. It's an opportunity,
39
00:02:49.960 --> 00:02:52.960
sure, but it comes with more
baggage than a Kardashian on a world
40
00:02:53.039 --> 00:02:57.439
tour. So good luck, Madam
Vice President. Remember if all else fails,
41
00:02:57.520 --> 00:03:01.120
just laugh awkwardly. It's worked so
far. Right anyway, I have
42
00:03:01.199 --> 00:03:05.639
to towel off and I'm seriously not
even wearing a shirt right now. As
43
00:03:05.639 --> 00:03:08.120
I jumped on the laptop as soon
as I heard I'll let the dust settle
44
00:03:08.360 --> 00:03:12.159
and check back in with you guys
in a bit when I can quote all
45
00:03:12.199 --> 00:03:15.960
the politician reactions and make fun of
them. Of course, portions of today's
46
00:03:15.960 --> 00:03:20.680
show weren't even made with the help
of Ai. Even Ai gets a day
47
00:03:20.680 --> 00:03:23.879
off around here. Anyway called it
1
00:00:03.120 --> 00:00:09.439
Calarogu Shark Media from poolside, where
we told you there was no way Biden
2
00:00:09.480 --> 00:00:12.400
would let us have a day off. This is ballot. Did I call
3
00:00:12.439 --> 00:00:16.239
it on Yesterday's show or did I
call it check Saturday's episode where I predicted
4
00:00:16.239 --> 00:00:21.079
this? Anyway, Biden isn't running. Let's hit this seriously, Joe,
5
00:00:21.199 --> 00:00:24.199
I was literally in the pool when
the news broke, and I'm still wet
6
00:00:24.239 --> 00:00:28.800
and not even wearing a shirt anyway. In a statement, Joe Biden said,
7
00:00:29.320 --> 00:00:32.280
I believe it is in the best
interest of my party and the country
8
00:00:32.479 --> 00:00:36.479
for me to stand down and to
focus solely on fulfilling my duties as president
9
00:00:36.640 --> 00:00:40.159
for the reminder of my term.
Wait did he say reminder or is there
10
00:00:40.159 --> 00:00:42.920
a typo in my script? It
kind of belies the point, doesn't it.
11
00:00:43.560 --> 00:00:47.359
Biden said he wants to focus on
fulfilling my duties as president for the
12
00:00:47.399 --> 00:00:52.640
remainder of my term, because apparently
running for reelection while being president is like
13
00:00:52.719 --> 00:00:57.200
trying to text and drive. It's
just not safe for anyone involved. This
14
00:00:57.320 --> 00:01:00.679
leaves the Democrats in a pickle bigger
than the one you'd find at a county
15
00:01:00.719 --> 00:01:04.200
fair. They're scrambling faster than a
squirrel on a bird feeder to find a
16
00:01:04.239 --> 00:01:10.920
new candidate. It's like political musical
chairs, but the music stopped and everyone's
17
00:01:10.959 --> 00:01:15.840
still looking for a seat. Vice
President Kamala Harris might step up, but
18
00:01:15.920 --> 00:01:19.719
her approval ratings are about as high
as my enthusiasm for doing taxes. It's
19
00:01:19.760 --> 00:01:26.560
like choosing between lukewarm coffee and day
old tea. Neither option is particularly exciting.
20
00:01:26.079 --> 00:01:30.719
The DNC is now facing a task
more challenging than explaining TikTok to your
21
00:01:30.760 --> 00:01:37.120
grandparents. They've got to find a
new nominee faster than you can say constitutional
22
00:01:37.159 --> 00:01:41.239
crisis. It's like trying to plan
a wedding in a week, but instead
23
00:01:41.239 --> 00:01:46.239
of I do someone has to say
I'll run the country. Meanwhile, Trump
24
00:01:46.280 --> 00:01:49.879
is probably grinning wider than a chesh
or cat that just won the lottery.
25
00:01:49.599 --> 00:01:55.560
He's gone from facing his old nemesis
to potentially squaring off against a mystery opponent.
26
00:01:56.120 --> 00:01:59.519
It's like showing up for a rematch
only to find out your opponent got
27
00:01:59.599 --> 00:02:02.959
stuck in traffic. So buckle up, America. This election just went from
28
00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:07.640
a predictable rerun to a reality show
where even the producers don't know what's going
29
00:02:07.640 --> 00:02:10.639
to happen next. May the odds
be ever in our favor, and may
30
00:02:10.680 --> 00:02:15.159
someone remember where we put that torch
Biden supposed to pass. I bet Harris
31
00:02:15.199 --> 00:02:19.599
is feeling more mixed emotions than a
kid who just found out schools canceled.
32
00:02:20.319 --> 00:02:24.080
But it's because the building burned down. On one hand, she's probably thinking
33
00:02:24.360 --> 00:02:28.919
it's my time to shine. On
the other hand, it's more like,
34
00:02:29.479 --> 00:02:34.120
oh crud, now I actually have
to do this. Sources say Harris immediately
35
00:02:34.120 --> 00:02:38.000
called her staff for an emergency meeting, and by staff, I mean the
36
00:02:38.039 --> 00:02:42.360
three interns who haven't quit yet.
But let's be real, Harris is probably
37
00:02:42.400 --> 00:02:45.879
feeling like she just inherited a car
with two hundred thousand miles on it and
38
00:02:45.919 --> 00:02:49.919
a check engine light that's been on
since twenty twenty one. It's an opportunity,
39
00:02:49.960 --> 00:02:52.960
sure, but it comes with more
baggage than a Kardashian on a world
40
00:02:53.039 --> 00:02:57.439
tour. So good luck, Madam
Vice President. Remember if all else fails,
41
00:02:57.520 --> 00:03:01.120
just laugh awkwardly. It's worked so
far. Right anyway, I have
42
00:03:01.199 --> 00:03:05.639
to towel off and I'm seriously not
even wearing a shirt right now. As
43
00:03:05.639 --> 00:03:08.120
I jumped on the laptop as soon
as I heard I'll let the dust settle
44
00:03:08.360 --> 00:03:12.159
and check back in with you guys
in a bit when I can quote all
45
00:03:12.199 --> 00:03:15.960
the politician reactions and make fun of
them. Of course, portions of today's
46
00:03:15.960 --> 00:03:20.680
show weren't even made with the help
of Ai. Even Ai gets a day
47
00:03:20.680 --> 00:03:23.879
off around here. Anyway called it