Nov. 17, 2025

A Billie Eilish vs Elon Musk war? That sounds fun!

Show Notes
Transcript

From Chicago — where President Trump demanded troops for the non-existent “Miracle Mile” — Ballot breaks down a day of presidential confusion, late-night energy bragging, and celebrity fury. Trump’s geography gaffe sets the tone as ABC’s Jonathan Karl reveals the president’s frantic no-sleep routine, prompting the White House to insist he’s basically immortal despite MRIs, bruised hands, and mid-event nod-offs.

Then Billie Eilish jumps in swinging, blasting Elon Musk over his trillion-dollar payday with an Instagram tirade spicy enough to melt a Tesla battery.

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WEBVTT

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Calaruga shark media from Chicago, where I don't ask Trump

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for directions. This is valid. That's right. You think he

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will be able to understand upper and lower streets. Good

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luck with that. I'm Patrick Gutfield. President Trump dropped a

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truth social missive that's part economic diagnosis, part military strategy,

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and entirely divorced from basic Chicago street names. He's demanding

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troops be deployed to save the Miracle Mile, which drum

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roll please, doesn't actually exist in Chicago. It's like calling

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New York's Fifth Avenue sixth Boulevard and then demanding the

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National Guard intervene. What Trump means is the Magnificent Mile,

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that glorious stretch of Michigan Avenue where shopping meets Chicago swagger.

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And yes, it's had some challenges. Back in twenty twenty one,

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about thirty percent of storefronts were vacant, organized theft was

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a problem. But here's the plot twist. Post pandemic, the

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street is making a comeback. Stores are moving in, shoppers

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are returning. Heck, Hotel Chocolat just set up shop. But

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Trump's solution military intervention, because nothing says urban renewal like

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deploying soldiers to solve retail vacancies. It's like using a

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sledgehammer to hang a picture frame. Technically possible, but definitely

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not recommended. Jonathan Carl from ABC News just dropped a

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bombshell about President Trump's superhuman sleep schedule, or lack thereof. Apparently,

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Trump operates like a smartphone with infinite battery life, taking

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calls at hours that would make an owl look lazy.

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Carl says Trump's either up before seven in the morning

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or messaging late into the night. He's constantly constant energy,

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constant activity, and he's almost acting like a guy that

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feels like he's running out of time, Carl explained, which,

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at seventy nine years old, sounds less like a compliment

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and more like a medical warning. The administration is spinning

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this like a championship gymnast. Vice President JD Vance claims

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Trump doesn't have an off switch. Attorney General Pam Bondi

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boasts that none of us know when he sleeps. It's

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like they're describing a caffeinated robot, not a septagenarian president.

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But here's the kicker. Trump's idea of self care is

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a weekly golf game and a diet consisting primarily of

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diet coke and McDonald's. The National Institute on Aging is

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probably having a collective heart attack just hearing about this.

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And let's talk about those dozy episodes. Trump's been caught

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nodding off during White House events like a grandpa at

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a church sermon. His bruised hands and mysterious MRI are

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fueling more speculation than a true crime podcast. The White

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House's response classic Trump. Their spokesperson basically said he's a

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champion level golfer who greets, trick or treaters, as if

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that's a medical certification of peak health. President Trump's latest

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brilliant idea the fifty year mortgage, because apparently thirty years

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of debt wasn't long enough. He's proposing alone so extended,

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your grandchildren might be making payments on the house you

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wanted to buy. Conservative voices aren't exactly throwing a parade.

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Marjorie Taylor Green summed it up perfectly in Debt Forever

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in Debt for Life. It's like she read the mortgage

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terms and decided this is less a financial strategy and

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more a multi generational curse. Trump's pitch, you'll pay less

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per month, sure, and if you ignore the fact that

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you'll be paying so much interest, the bank might name

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a wing after you. It's financial algebra meets performance art.

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Even the Federal Housing Finance Agency is doing some Olympic

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level backflips around this idea. Their director called it a

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complete game changer, which is bureaucratic speak for we're definitely

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going to talk about this until everyone gets exhausted. The

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real punchline, Trump's still claiming we have the greatest economy

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we've ever had while proposing a mortgage plan that sounds

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like it was drafted during a caffeine induced hallucination. Billie Eilish,

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the twenty three year old musical powerhouse, just went nuclear

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on Elon Musk, and she did not come with a

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diplomatic passport. After Tesla's shareholders approved a one trillion dollar

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pay package for Musk, Eilish decided to turn Instagram into

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her personal critique platform. She reposted content from a pro

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choice group suggesting ways Musk could use his astronomical wealth,

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ending world hunger, providing clean water, globally saving endangered species,

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or rebuilding gaza. Then she added her own colorful commentary,

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something about a cat and a word that rhymes with B.

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While I can't repeat her exact words, this is a

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family show. Let's just say she used language that would

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make us sailor blush. Her message essentially boiled down to, hey, megabillionaire,

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maybe do something meaningful with all that cash. Musk, who

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recently became the world's first potential trillionaire, apparently triggered Eilish's

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activist instincts. She served him a verbal SmackDown that's more

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savage than a TikTok roast battle. The Daily Beast is

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waiting for comments from both camps. Something tells me Musk's

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response will be just as interesting as Eilish's initial blast.

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Portions of today's show were made with the help of

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Ai