A Hot Take on Trust – Do They Trust Your Association?

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KiKi L'Italien: I'm the host of
Association Chat KiKi L'Italien.

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And today I want to do a mini
episode. It's a special episode,

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not just me talking no special
guests, it will be a short one,

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about trust and associations
trust and associations. Now, why

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did I want to talk about that?
It's one of my absolute favorite

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topics. I love speaking about
it. I deliver a lot of keynotes

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and presentations in breakouts
and workshops about trust. And I

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ask a lot of questions about it.
Because I study it, I read it, I

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obsess about it. And the reason
why is because no one actually

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pulls you aside in school, at
least not when I went through

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school, to teach you how to
proactively go about developing

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trust, you might learn about
interpersonal communications,

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you might learn about maybe even
creating a culture of safety,

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which would be advanced, I
think, but needed in this day

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and age. But very rarely do you
go about proactively learning

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how to demonstrate and cultivate
trustworthiness in your

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interpersonal relationships and
on behalf of brands and

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organizations? And because this
is a favorite topic of mine that

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I teach about, and I talk about,
I actually asked this question

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as a question of the week in
both the Association Chat

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community this week, but also,
at big red M, which is, many of

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you may know that I'm the VP of
Marketing and community

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engagement there. And wanting to
find out like, how does trust

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work with the way that we work
with associations. And so many

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of you have already responded.
And that was just posted

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yesterday. So within 24 hours
time, I've received over 15

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responses, and all the different
places where this has been

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posted. And I certainly have
heard and seen different types

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of stories being told so many
times countless times leading up

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to asking this question, but I
thought for today's Association

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Chat podcast, because I am
trying to create a more

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consistent schedule and come to
you every Tuesday. Typically, I

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have a guest every Tuesday this
week, I did not and so I

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thought, let's talk about trust.
Okay, so what about trust? So

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who cares? Why is it important?
If we have it? I think one of

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the first things you either have
it or you don't, I don't know

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that you can build it, it takes
a long time to build it. I mean,

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some all of this can be true.
But is all of this true all the

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time? No. You either have it or
you don't. Kinda or maybe you

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have some level of it. And it's
all about demonstrating why you

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deserve more. It takes a long
time to build it not

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necessarily. There are countless
of exam, countless examples of

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why somebody decides that
they're going to fast track

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trust. And we have so many
examples of it that we can't say

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that's always true. Sometimes
you can fast track trust.

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Sometimes you have to like when
you decide that it is safe to

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get into that. Uber, you're
making a trust decision. But

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there are certainly things that
help lead us down the path. Now

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why is it important for us to
cultivate trust? Why is it

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important for us to even ask
about this? Because as you have

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times of uncertainty which that
phrase coming out of the

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pandemic, we've definitely heard
ad nauseam. When you have

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societal changes taking place,
technological changes taking

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place, lots of questions being
asked, you're going to have even

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more questions being asked this
is just the way that it is

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because people are trying to
establish what is true, and what

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can they trust. Now for
associations, the role that

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associations play, part of an
associations value proposition

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are the three C's, and it's the
commitment, the content and the

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community and ostensibly with
that comes trust that we can

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trust what an Association puts
out there. Because we have

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things like peer review, or
because we have a curated set of

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members or leaders in a
position, who will make sure

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that decisions are being made
properly and that the

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organization is representing the
industry or science or whatever

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profession in a way that is in
keeping with its mission. So

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there's this idea that
associations are supposed to be

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more trustworthy. So that is,
first and foremost, one of the

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big The things we want to
establish why we why it's

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important. But beyond that
person to person, human to

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human, it's important because
there's this need for belonging

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and survival. And if we don't
trust the people we're around or

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the groups that we're affiliated
with, that creates chaos, it can

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create inefficiencies, it can
create all kinds of things, the

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CYA, which is cover your
applications, I'm just going to

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make this family friendly. That
creates inefficiency. And it

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definitely can create a more
toxic environment. But

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unfortunately, can sometimes be
a necessity right now,

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I think that this is an
interesting question for us to

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ask about ourselves
independently, because we need

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to think as individuals, how we
are acting in a way that can

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demonstrate trustworthiness on a
regular basis. One of these

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things that you can do that's
relatively easy in the grand

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scheme of things, but not maybe
easy. As you're setting about

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doing it in our day to day busy
lives, is consistency is showing

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up when you say you're gonna
show up creating a pattern.

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Humans look for patterns. When
we create consistent behavior,

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we create behaviors and patterns
that other people can believe

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in. And they see that as proof
of our trustworthiness as

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evidence if you're going to
check the box for

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trustworthiness. There you go,
you've got one really great

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piece of evidence, what do you
think about the way that trust

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and associations intersect or
how trust what role it plays in

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the work that you do in the
association industry, I can

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share with you what some people
have been sharing on the

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different Association Chat
channels, and also internal to

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big red M, not sharing names. If
you're part of the groups, you

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can go to those groups and see
it for yourself. But over on

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Association Chat, on LinkedIn,
we had a great comment. And this

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person said, Without trust, we
have nothing we need to trust

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our members, and they need to
trust us trust on teams is

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imperative six to success.
That's the key to providing

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outstanding member experiences,
elevating the professions we

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serve, and enhancing our
relevance. Absolutely. This

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trust on teams part is so key
because obviously, when you're

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talking about associations, a
lot of times you're thinking

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about, how are we cultivating
trust with our members and our

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volunteer leaders in the public
at large. But we also need to be

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thinking internally about how
we're cultivating trust amongst

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ourselves like with our own
teams, and a lot of times,

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that's where a lot of this
strain and struggle can come up,

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when there is too much of a cya
culture where people are afraid

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to send emails or to take
chances on new ideas, because

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taking that risk is just too
much of a risk. And they're

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afraid of things being shot down
or of having some sort of

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retribution, come against them.
This is something that gets in

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the way of making change. It's
something that gets in the way

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of innovation. It's something
that gets in the way of creative

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thinking. All of these things
are problem solving behaviors

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and ways of thinking that we
really need to begin to figure

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out how to embrace more of that
and to make our teams and our

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associations and our companies,
the types of places where people

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feel safe enough to be able to
raise their hand if there's a

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problem, to let others know if
there is a better way to do

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something to offer up ideas and
suggestions. Not that those

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things need to happen right
away, but just that they'd be

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considered and just that for
sure that somebody isn't

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ostracized because they've
ventured to have a new idea.

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Some other ideas, some other
thoughts that we heard from

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people over in the Association
Chat group on Facebook, somebody

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wrote, as a consultant, I strive
to build trust with my clients,

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but they need to show me that
they're worthy of my trust. And

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then we had another response,
just as the single most

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important and meaningful
cultural component of the work

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environment without trust,
nothing will operate at its

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highest level. Check out an old
Colin Powell video that makes

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the point and then this person
shares a link to that if you

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want to see any of these
comments. By the way, if you're

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a member of the Association
Chat, a new era, it's called

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Association Chat, a new era
study New Facebook group, you

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can go join that. We also have
another conversation going on

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the Association Chat group on
LinkedIn. And then obviously, if

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you're watching this, then
you're seeing it on YouTube, or

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in the Facebook group, or you
might be watching it on

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LinkedIn. So in which case, it
won't be too hard to join those

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groups that way. And then, of
course, make sure that you join

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the newsletter, because I'll
summarize all of this and put it

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in a handy little list of
takeaways for the week. But back

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to what some people had offered
up as some of their thoughts on

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this question. Absolutely
everything. If there wasn't

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trust, neither my association or
the role I play would survive. I

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learned the hard lesson, after
23 years at my former

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Association, this person rights
trust comes in many forms. And I

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think that can be where this
question becomes more

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interesting. I think most of the
professionals here agree that

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trust is an essential component
to individual and organizational

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success. in the people business
we are in, it means different

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things to everyone. First
character, top of the list is

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Are you a person of good
character who people trust, it

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is not about performance or
results. This is the I leave my

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dog with them for a week type of
trust. Number two, and I love

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that number two performance, I
leave my dog with them for a

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week, but wouldn't hand over a
client. It's tricky, right? We

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all know these people, they help
you anytime you needed it, you

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give them the shirt off your
back. But are they always going

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to deliver the goods? Maybe not?
I'm sure you know, the reverse

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as well. I'm not sure I like
this person, I'm not sure if I

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trust them to watch my dog. But
if I need something done,

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they're the person I want to do
it. And the third is

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responsibility, in my opinion,
the most important form of trust

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for staff culture and
organizational success. I had a

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boss who had a sign in his
office that was just this, d w

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YSYD. Or SYWD may say that
again, DW YSYWD. Other than

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being a palindrome, which I
always like it stood for do what

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you say you will do. It's
trusting your teammates that

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more often than not, if they say
they will call someone they

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will, if they commit to a report
by Friday, they will do it. If

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they tell you they can't be
somewhere when you need them.

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It's the trust that there is a
sound reasoning behind it. Teams

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need this kind of trust the most
in my opinion, I know if they

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say they're going to take care
of my dog, I trust they will

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show up when they say they're
going to follow the instructions

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I provide. And, and then he
followed this up with it's

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everything. And I really think
that that's true, right? It's so

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true. We have a comment coming
in here from Facebook user.

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Today, we live in rapid change
knowledge levels fast and fast I

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got it. Governance is 20th, even
19th century, and institutions,

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including associations are not
adapting to the new environment.

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Thus, trust is harder to gain.
The manner in which Trust is

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earned is also changing. An
organizational environment that

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fails and adapting to new times
will not long survive. What a

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great point. The thing about
trust is that even if you've

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built it once, even if you've
had it, even if you've

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established it, whether it was
over a great dinner, and

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suddenly you really trust this
person, or whether it's been

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over 15 years, we all know what
happens when you lose, it

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doesn't matter if it was over 15
years, over 15 minutes. Once you

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lose trust, it's really hard to
regain it back. So the idea that

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we're always cultivating trust
that we're always working at it

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that we're always thinking about
how we can demonstrate

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trustworthiness to others is so
key.

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And I'm pausing because I've
been talking a lot and usually I

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would have a guest talking by
this point. But it's also

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because I think that it's really
a key point to think about that

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piece right there. We can't
control everything around us.

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What we can control is what we
do, we can control most of the

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time, we can control what we do.
And that element of doing what

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you say you will do is so key. I
used to have a post post it

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note. I kept on the bottom of my
computer that said My word is

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gold. My word is gold. And I
took it off at one point because

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I became disgusted with myself
because I found that I was

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constantly doing things. Even if
it was something small it was

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like I I would say, Yeah, I'll
give you a call before the end

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of the week, and then I didn't
do it. Now, okay, we all get

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busy and many of you are
probably very busy yourselves.

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And you're also, if you're
watching this, you probably know

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you're being probably nice
people. And you're going to say,

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Yeah, but Kiki, I know, you
can't be perfect. And that's

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true. But the fact that I took
the post it note down, you

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should know that it was many
times that I failed, in my

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estimation, to uphold to my word
is gold. My grandfather really

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believed in this neck, I know
that this is something that we

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try to aim to do a good job at.
But it's something that I've

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seen the benefits of when you
have that consistency. And I've

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also see what happens when you
don't. And in starting this new

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job, with big red M. One thing
that I've seen is there is this

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new team that I'm working with,
and I'm regularly going in to

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try to like every time I'm
reporting on what I'm doing for

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the week, I asked this question
of the team over at Big Red and

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to see like, how does it impact
the way that they're working

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with associations. And so for
those of you who don't aren't

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familiar with big red am, just
really quickly, there's this

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consulting side, there's also
the sales side sells, membership

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and sponsorships and exhibit
sales and all kinds of things

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and works with associations that
way consulting consulting side,

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you'll hear all about it
supports with membership,

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recruitment strategies, and
values, Proposition work, and

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that kind of stuff. So if you
want to find out more, I

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encourage you to go over there
to Big Red m.com. Find out more.

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But anyway, so every Monday, I
asked a question over there to

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find out more about how the team
feels about the work that it

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does with associations. And this
is what one of our AES that

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works over there said, Trust is
huge and needed from both sides

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in order to have a successful
long standing partnership. And

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the situation of a new client,
the best way to build trust, in

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my opinion, is to ask a lot of
questions from the beginning,

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listen, be a sponge, give honest
feedback, show them that you're

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working on their behalf and as
an extension of their staff, we

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also need to trust that
associations will be honest with

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us, for example, if they're
having conversations with

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prospects, they should fill you
in on those conversations and

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pull you into them. building
that trust with each other shows

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us as one team to the prospects
and bears success at close

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closing a sale. The worst
situation is when an association

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is talking to a prospect and
doesn't tell you, and then you

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find out from the prospect when
you try to pitch them and it

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makes you look like oh, you and
the association are not on the

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same team. And it creates a
divide in the relationship but

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also confuses the prospect, you
and the association are on the

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same team. And having that
mutual trust gives off that

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impression to prospects. I see
you Facebook user Facebook user

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says social media is also making
trust more difficult. Ai makes

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us ask if it's real. And short
trust is developed under new and

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evolving behaviors, our thinking
must evolve. So true. And I

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think about this a lot as
somebody who really tends to

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love technology and learn all of
these new tricks, and things

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that you can do with it and ways
to use technology as a tool. He

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began saying, who's using it for
nefarious purposes, who's using

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it, not for good, but for the
more negative things that can be

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done with it. And it does make
you ask more questions. It also

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makes you value your
interpersonal relationships even

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more. That's why our meetings
are probably becoming more

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important because when we meet
in person I'm looking at you I'm

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not looking at some AI version
of you an email that could have

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been crafted by anyone. I'm not
looking at some sort of SEO

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optimized version of you, I'm
talking to you until you can

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make some sort of fest similarly
that that attends in your place,

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I'm going to be talking to you
in person. So these in person

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events become even more
important if we know how to do

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our best at putting our best
foot forward. And then take

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those relationships and
cultivate them in a meaningful

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way. And that's the thing that
I'm worried about is actually

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once we have the trust, what do
we do with it? And I'm thinking

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about this a lot because I'm now
in the seat of focusing on one

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organization's marketing F hurts
and how to not just spread

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awareness but also to like,
build those relationships. I'm

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thinking of what happens when
somebody signs up for the

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newsletter, what happens with
the communication after that

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what happens when they show up
to the CEO event, what happens

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when they show up to ASC annual
and go to talk with somebody who

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represents the organization. And
it's these types of things that

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have me thinking even more in
depth about how important it is

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every step of the way, not just
that I'm interacting at a

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certain level, we're hoping
that's going to be demonstrating

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trustworthy behavior. But then
after that, like, how is the

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organization doing it? And how
can we also build on that and

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educate others within our
organizations, to not just trust

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each other, but to also
cultivate that trust for our

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members? And for our volunteer
leaders? I started out working

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in associations, I always think
from that perspective, first,

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and how would it be with
building those relationships in

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an association and it's the same
for communities, any community?

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How am I doing it for the
Woman's Club of Winona, I could

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do better there, there are
definitely ways that we can

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improve, usually looking at
communication first, and then

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looking at other ways that we
can work on our relationship

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building skills, purposefully.
But a lot of times, some of the

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simplest things that we can do
is to begin with ourselves, and

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to look at how am I making sure
that I show up the way that I'm

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supposed to? How am I showing
that I'm accountable? And I'm

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trusting in others around me?
How am I demonstrating

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trustworthiness to my team
members? How am I demonstrating

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trustworthiness to the members
or the volunteer leaders that I

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work with? And where am I most
off brand? Where am I most where

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am I not meeting the mark? So
asking these types of questions

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can really help you because we
can begin to chip away at some

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of the different types of trust
busting behaviors, that we have

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the things that can destroy our
trust, and begin to work at that

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purposefully, to try to build
that not just for ourselves, but

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also for our organizations. And
I'm talking about not just

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associations, but also the for
profits in our industry, as a

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vendor. If you're an industry
partner, if you're whatever you

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want to call yourself, right? If
you're a consultant, this issue

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is important for all of us. And
I do think that how it impacts

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the role of trust and
associations is a worthy

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conversation that we should
continue to have and work on and

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develop along the way. So that
we can find meaningful ways to

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do better. Think about how much
better

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the value proposition for your
association, if you're an

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association leader, think about
how much stronger it would be if

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the trust piece were stronger.
Think about if you just focused

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on that part of it. How much
stronger would your loyalty be?

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And your volunteer base? If the
trust were stronger there? And

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what are some ways that you
could look at cultivating that

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trust what is happening within
the industry that we need to be

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aware of, and showing that there
is that leadership and that

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00:24:03,570 --> 00:24:06,510
guidance that feeds into the
competency for the character,

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part of it competency and
character of trust for the

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character part of it. Just doing
what you say you will do? Not

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00:24:14,910 --> 00:24:21,720
spreading gossip, making sure
that you're you are treating

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yourself with respect and
treating others with respect.

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And I think in a lot of cases
when we're looking at all of

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these stories of governance gone
wrong, right lately, open AI the

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questions of what did they
understand their fiduciary

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responsibility? And were people
actually doing what they said

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questions about about behavior
and transparency. Transparency

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00:24:50,460 --> 00:24:54,690
doesn't always equal trust, but
this question about were things

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hidden on purpose, but was there
a lack of checks and balances?

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Was it systemic Pick what was
broken there. And this idea of

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figuring out how to write the
ship, but also to make sure that

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your ship never gets to that
point. If you're an association

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that is not an AR, or even the
NRA, if you're an association

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that is not in that crisis,
don't get there. Ask yourself,

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Where is my association most on
brand? Where are we strong? What

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00:25:29,970 --> 00:25:34,350
is the trustworthiness that most
of our Association members and

356
00:25:34,350 --> 00:25:38,070
volunteer leaders? How would we
rank? How would we rank

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ourselves? There's a book that
someone gave me recently to read

358
00:25:44,250 --> 00:25:47,520
tomorrow, called trusted leader
eight pillars that drive

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00:25:47,520 --> 00:25:51,930
results. And this is great. I've
read a lot of books on trust.

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This is the latest one. And it
talks about the eight pillars of

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trust and really, how you can
evaluate yourself on these

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00:26:01,260 --> 00:26:04,110
pillars. And I'll just tell you
the pillars really quickly.

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There are eight pillars clarity,
compassion, character,

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00:26:10,590 --> 00:26:17,370
competency, commitment,
connection, contribution, and

365
00:26:17,370 --> 00:26:22,350
consistency. That's and
consistency, not inconsistency,

366
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which would be a totally
different story. Okay. So yeah,

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eight pillars, and this, again,
is called trusted leader, eight

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00:26:28,890 --> 00:26:33,540
pillars that drive results, it's
by David horse hugger. But I

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think, as I wrap up this idea of
the role of trust and

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associations, I want to
underline and highlight and bold

371
00:26:44,310 --> 00:26:48,780
and put an asterisk by it, I
want to tell you that this is

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one of the most important pieces
of the value proposition for

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associations is this trust
piece, right? The fact that our

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education, associations offering
education, or publications, or

375
00:27:04,080 --> 00:27:11,130
research, or any of the other
work that good associations do,

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00:27:11,370 --> 00:27:16,620
most often all comes back to
trust. The reason why the media

377
00:27:16,620 --> 00:27:20,340
reaches out to the association
of fill in the blank whenever

378
00:27:20,340 --> 00:27:24,300
there's a new story is because
it's the established trusted

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00:27:24,300 --> 00:27:30,780
leader in that field, right? The
source of truth. So we need to

380
00:27:30,780 --> 00:27:35,040
protect that, especially in a
time and age where we have

381
00:27:35,040 --> 00:27:39,990
things like AI, which can, on
the surface level, at least,

382
00:27:40,020 --> 00:27:45,630
seem to be a new source of truth
for all things. But really, it

383
00:27:45,630 --> 00:27:50,790
is at best surface level. And we
need to be very careful and

384
00:27:51,030 --> 00:27:57,420
conscious in the way that we not
only protect, but purposefully

385
00:27:57,450 --> 00:28:02,190
demonstrate and proactively
cultivate trust for our

386
00:28:02,190 --> 00:28:08,670
associations. So that's my TED
talk for today. I promise you, I

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00:28:08,670 --> 00:28:12,570
will be back next week with a
special guest next two weeks in

388
00:28:12,570 --> 00:28:14,640
a row, we have guests after
guests, it's going to be

389
00:28:14,640 --> 00:28:18,780
amazing. We're moving from
topics about technology, talking

390
00:28:18,780 --> 00:28:23,790
about things like AI, and those
types of things, which was a

391
00:28:23,790 --> 00:28:27,750
focus for the latter part of
January and into February, and

392
00:28:27,750 --> 00:28:32,310
we're moving into leadership
topics. So for all of March,

393
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you're going to be looking at
leadership topics for

394
00:28:34,230 --> 00:28:39,450
Association Chat. But I hope
that you will tune in, I hope

395
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that you'll continue to ask
questions, and I hope you'll

396
00:28:42,270 --> 00:28:47,760
keep learning every day. And the
reason why you ask why do I care

397
00:28:47,760 --> 00:28:53,760
about curiosity so much? Because
Joseph Campbell once said, A

398
00:28:53,760 --> 00:28:59,340
cave you fear to enter holds the
treasure you seek. So keep

399
00:28:59,340 --> 00:29:02,940
seeking and keep looking in
those caves and dare to ask the

400
00:29:02,940 --> 00:29:07,170
questions and have a great rest
of the week, everyone