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Chapters

00:00 - Orbs' Explosive Entrance

03:49 - Concussion Protocol for Kevin

12:56 - Rage, Protection, and Apocalypse Readiness

29:33 - Terrorist Threats and Doomsday Theories

45:21 - One-Eyed Willie and Workplace Drama

01:07:07 - Gas Station Food Roulette Challenge

01:18:39 - Muffins Built Like Concrete

Transcript
WEBVTT

00:00:02.004 --> 00:00:04.150
One, one, two.

00:00:04.150 --> 00:00:07.248
Did we put the headline up?

00:00:07.248 --> 00:00:08.111
Orbs is in trouble.

00:00:12.807 --> 00:00:14.432
No one is safe from Orbs.

00:00:16.280 --> 00:00:18.469
This is Orbs' entry song as he walks into the bar.

00:00:20.041 --> 00:00:24.521
Got his boxing gloves on they're leaving my name is Off.

00:00:54.103 --> 00:00:55.749
I kick doors in down at bars strangers.

00:00:55.749 --> 00:01:01.122
Men Look at you, go with the freestyle.

00:01:01.122 --> 00:01:10.805
Yeah, I murder rapists Alleged Killing sex traffickers.

00:01:10.805 --> 00:01:19.090
No sex traffickers Phenomenal yeah, friday.

00:01:19.090 --> 00:01:24.792
Yeah, it's a fuck you.

00:01:24.792 --> 00:01:39.576
Youtube Friday God, what a great fucking song.

00:01:39.576 --> 00:01:41.528
I am fucking pumped up.

00:01:41.528 --> 00:01:43.246
Do you want to go down there now, let's go.

00:01:44.283 --> 00:01:47.442
Oh, now we're going no, we're good, they're leaving right now.

00:01:47.442 --> 00:01:48.507
They're leaving, Are you sure?

00:01:48.507 --> 00:01:49.368
Because I no.

00:01:49.368 --> 00:01:49.971
I got a text.

00:01:51.665 --> 00:01:54.579
We could order a couple things of wings and pick them up when we get there.

00:01:54.579 --> 00:01:56.456
Yeah, dude, I am pumped up right now.

00:01:57.061 --> 00:01:58.808
We're leaving now, so we're good.

00:01:58.808 --> 00:02:00.825
Ladies and gentlemen.

00:02:06.079 --> 00:02:06.444
You and gentlemen.

00:02:06.444 --> 00:02:08.883
You missed Aub's blowing up for the last 45 minutes, and now he's back to his old self.

00:02:08.883 --> 00:02:14.167
Welcome to the live therapy session that we have been hoping for.

00:02:14.167 --> 00:02:25.766
Really, I mean, what has just occurred here at the Aubrey Estate is, I mean and we're not even talking about the lump on his eye I mean it's really a rollercoaster of emotion.

00:02:25.787 --> 00:02:28.248
Well, at least we know how to keep him going in the apocalypse.

00:02:28.248 --> 00:02:30.126
Oh, that's a good point.

00:02:30.126 --> 00:02:34.026
Yeah, anytime he's ready to off himself, we know how to fire him back up.

00:02:34.026 --> 00:02:37.949
Hey, kev, there's a strange guy down there at the watering hole.

00:02:37.949 --> 00:02:39.822
He's asking for numbers.

00:02:39.822 --> 00:02:42.686
I don't know why South Service hasn't been working for weeks.

00:02:42.686 --> 00:02:46.151
I mean, it's right down the hill, right by the oak tree over there in the logs.

00:02:46.592 --> 00:02:48.253
You fuckers man Like fuck.

00:02:48.253 --> 00:02:49.276
You fuckers man.

00:02:49.276 --> 00:02:51.187
I love you.

00:02:52.300 --> 00:02:52.782
I love you.

00:02:52.782 --> 00:02:54.108
He's not a zombie or anything.

00:02:54.108 --> 00:02:55.361
I love you Okay.

00:02:56.365 --> 00:02:56.625
Hey.

00:02:57.266 --> 00:02:57.627
Kinger.

00:02:59.972 --> 00:03:02.180
Oh my God, I was sitting out there.

00:03:02.180 --> 00:03:08.854
I was about to draw up a syringe of Thorazine and put that right in your behind and make you sleep a little bit.

00:03:08.854 --> 00:03:10.887
I was very concerned for your well-being.

00:03:10.887 --> 00:03:12.073
I think you can use the rest.

00:03:12.073 --> 00:03:14.788
Yeah, I was like he is going to hey man.

00:03:14.788 --> 00:03:17.026
He's going to rape and pillage.

00:03:17.026 --> 00:03:20.270
That concussion he sustained yesterday is causing damage right now.

00:03:20.460 --> 00:03:22.021
I was fired up for fucking.

00:03:22.021 --> 00:03:22.562
Every good reason, vlad.

00:03:22.562 --> 00:03:23.544
I was fired up for fucking every good reason.

00:03:23.563 --> 00:03:23.644
Vlad.

00:03:23.644 --> 00:03:24.685
He's very erratic.

00:03:24.685 --> 00:03:26.768
He was acting like Vlad out there.

00:03:26.768 --> 00:03:27.949
He's very erratic.

00:03:27.949 --> 00:03:30.372
His mood swings are unbelievable.

00:03:30.372 --> 00:03:39.384
Well, there's probably a reason for this, and TID Nation that's out there.

00:03:39.384 --> 00:03:41.439
You should be concerned for our well-loved character of Orbs over here because we're going to do a.

00:03:41.439 --> 00:03:45.471
He took a nice shot in the eye.

00:03:45.471 --> 00:03:50.329
We were going to do an intervention, but the other half of the group is still intoxicated.

00:03:50.360 --> 00:03:56.770
Yeah, we're not going to do the intervention, so we're actually going to put Kevin through a concussion protocol.

00:03:58.721 --> 00:04:03.709
We do feel that his behavior is it's alarming.

00:04:03.709 --> 00:04:09.812
So we're going to put him through the concussion protocol because we do think he took a nice knock to the eyeball.

00:04:09.812 --> 00:04:17.769
Pat, can you pass the coasters, because I'm just randomly going to throw them at him during the course of the show I would love to, but he's actually sharpening them as we speak.

00:04:17.980 --> 00:04:19.245
Should I go up to the camera?

00:04:20.122 --> 00:04:24.064
Yeah, go up to the camera and as white trash as this fucking video looks.

00:04:24.064 --> 00:04:26.309
Oh boy, Try to get your eye in there.

00:04:26.309 --> 00:04:27.451
Let's see if this works.

00:04:28.052 --> 00:04:28.694
Get the good look.

00:04:29.841 --> 00:04:32.288
And we're going to show you that knot that's on his eye.

00:04:32.288 --> 00:04:35.446
This doesn't look like we're trying to film amateur porn.

00:04:35.446 --> 00:04:39.233
Hey, man, hey, let's see.

00:04:39.233 --> 00:04:40.422
Oh, that's a hematoma.

00:04:40.422 --> 00:04:41.144
Get your finger out of it.

00:04:41.144 --> 00:04:41.644
Look at that hematoma.

00:04:41.644 --> 00:04:42.067
It's a hematoma.

00:04:42.086 --> 00:04:42.788
Get your finger out of it.

00:04:42.809 --> 00:04:43.791
Look at that hematoma.

00:04:43.791 --> 00:04:45.997
It's a golf ball-sized nut right there, bro.

00:04:45.997 --> 00:04:48.725
Look at that.

00:04:48.725 --> 00:04:49.747
I mean the color it's.

00:04:49.747 --> 00:04:52.024
Oh no, no, you got to do a side profile.

00:04:52.024 --> 00:04:54.745
Okay, now turn to your.

00:04:54.745 --> 00:04:56.581
There you go.

00:04:56.581 --> 00:04:57.802
You look gorgeous, bro.

00:04:57.802 --> 00:04:58.944
You are hot.

00:04:58.944 --> 00:05:00.286
Wait, kevin, stay right there.

00:05:00.286 --> 00:05:01.526
Kevin, move it.

00:05:01.526 --> 00:05:02.649
That is your good side.

00:05:02.649 --> 00:05:03.329
Stay right there.

00:05:03.329 --> 00:05:03.810
Stay right there.

00:05:03.810 --> 00:05:06.333
Lean forward a little.

00:05:06.333 --> 00:05:09.295
I'm almost done.

00:05:09.295 --> 00:05:17.990
That looks so real.

00:05:17.990 --> 00:05:25.790
I was just in your nose, you were just snorting me, so he took his medication, but we do have to put him through Really.

00:05:25.790 --> 00:05:27.899
I mean we're have to put him through Really.

00:05:27.899 --> 00:05:29.569
I mean we're going to, I'm going to.

00:05:29.569 --> 00:05:31.108
Okay, I'm not going to lie.

00:05:31.108 --> 00:05:35.002
There's only one thing that makes me happier than what's going on right now, and you all know what that is.

00:05:35.002 --> 00:05:39.408
What is it?

00:05:39.408 --> 00:05:40.110
Ob's nose?

00:05:40.110 --> 00:05:42.694
Shrimp cubs.

00:05:42.694 --> 00:05:46.987
We don't like those places anymore, you sure.

00:05:47.007 --> 00:05:56.971
Oh, it was bad last night all right, all right yeah, drinking his bourbon is like drinking a glass full of nails.

00:05:56.971 --> 00:05:58.595
Let's see here.

00:05:58.595 --> 00:06:00.704
So the concussion protocol.

00:06:00.704 --> 00:06:01.545
This is what it is.

00:06:02.427 --> 00:06:05.273
Oh yeah, I make this larger oh you got yeah, like all right, all right, all right.

00:06:05.273 --> 00:06:05.374
So we're gonna do step one.

00:06:05.374 --> 00:06:05.475
What's step one?

00:06:05.475 --> 00:06:05.754
All right, uh, remove your protocol.

00:06:05.754 --> 00:06:05.788
This is what it is.

00:06:05.788 --> 00:06:05.920
I gotta make this larger.

00:06:05.920 --> 00:06:06.233
Oh you got yeah, like Alright, alright, alright.

00:06:06.661 --> 00:06:07.786
So we're gonna do Step one.

00:06:07.899 --> 00:06:08.482
What's step one?

00:06:08.541 --> 00:06:09.966
Alright, remove your helmet.

00:06:09.966 --> 00:06:13.084
Done, say the alphabet backwards.

00:06:13.084 --> 00:06:14.788
Okay, okay, oh, sorry, wrong text.

00:06:14.788 --> 00:06:18.730
Alright, team physician perform sideline survey.

00:06:18.730 --> 00:06:21.887
Alright, what was his baseline?

00:06:21.887 --> 00:06:23.081
Alright, sideline survey.

00:06:23.081 --> 00:06:25.144
I don't even know what the questions are.

00:06:25.144 --> 00:06:25.886
They're not even on here.

00:06:25.886 --> 00:06:27.367
All right, no go.

00:06:27.367 --> 00:06:30.894
What was the address of your childhood home?

00:06:30.894 --> 00:06:32.315
Maddox questions?

00:06:32.315 --> 00:06:33.737
What the fuck is this?

00:06:33.737 --> 00:06:35.120
I don't know if I want to give that First of all.

00:06:35.120 --> 00:06:35.701
No wonder why.

00:06:35.701 --> 00:06:36.562
No wonder why.

00:06:36.562 --> 00:06:38.665
No wonder why he's fine.

00:06:38.764 --> 00:06:41.689
He's fine why guys from the NFL can't come back.

00:06:41.689 --> 00:06:42.610
It's these questions.

00:06:42.610 --> 00:06:44.293
It says history of the event.

00:06:44.293 --> 00:06:46.975
Are you asking the oh, here we go.

00:06:46.975 --> 00:06:53.584
So when you were at work with your helper, do you remember exactly what happened?

00:06:53.584 --> 00:06:55.367
Saying his little helper I do, yeah, I do.

00:06:55.367 --> 00:06:56.470
All right, can you explain?

00:06:56.470 --> 00:07:00.826
I Sorry that pause was a little too long.

00:07:00.826 --> 00:07:01.389
So that's one.

00:07:01.389 --> 00:07:02.742
That's one, one we're going to throw down there.

00:07:02.742 --> 00:07:02.884
The.

00:07:02.903 --> 00:07:03.786
Cliff Notes version.

00:07:03.786 --> 00:07:05.490
The pause was like.

00:07:05.490 --> 00:07:09.827
I don't know if you want me to explain, nope the pause is your synapses are not snapping.

00:07:10.000 --> 00:07:11.255
I don't want to hear this story on air right now.

00:07:11.882 --> 00:07:15.346
So that's check number one, that's number one on the concern list.

00:07:15.767 --> 00:07:16.269
Sure Okay.

00:07:16.269 --> 00:07:19.605
Concussion signs and symptoms.

00:07:19.605 --> 00:07:21.403
Oh my God, I could fuck.

00:07:21.403 --> 00:07:21.884
There's a few.

00:07:21.884 --> 00:07:22.384
What are they?

00:07:22.384 --> 00:07:22.904
What are they?

00:07:22.904 --> 00:07:25.689
Aggression, murderous tone.

00:07:25.689 --> 00:07:31.588
I have a concussion, murderous tone, threatening behavior and posturing.

00:07:31.588 --> 00:07:49.389
I don't think you're reading off a real list right now I am making up my own right now, from my red flags that I saw Very, very emotional, totally Mood swings, quick mood swings Wow, that's number one on the list right there Not listening to friends when they talk to them.

00:07:51.509 --> 00:07:53.519
I feel that I listened when you were talking.

00:07:53.519 --> 00:07:59.065
We were told to shut up On several occasions, so check number two.

00:07:59.065 --> 00:08:01.865
Okay, maddox questions.

00:08:01.865 --> 00:08:05.887
I don't know who's Maddox, tommy Maddox, you'll go back from this.

00:08:05.887 --> 00:08:07.279
Alright, we're going to have to review the video.

00:08:07.279 --> 00:08:09.699
Do you have any video evidence that this actually happened?

00:08:09.699 --> 00:08:11.439
Oh my god, would that be phenomenal.

00:08:11.439 --> 00:08:12.966
It would be funny.

00:08:13.745 --> 00:08:14.992
What are we talking about?

00:08:14.992 --> 00:08:16.100
That actually happened.

00:08:16.100 --> 00:08:18.108
I don't know what actually happened.

00:08:19.264 --> 00:08:20.468
He can't even recall the event.

00:08:20.468 --> 00:08:22.680
We got to take him, call 911.

00:08:22.680 --> 00:08:24.379
We got more tests.

00:08:24.379 --> 00:08:26.362
We're going to have to do a cervical spine exam.

00:08:26.362 --> 00:08:27.947
Can you lay down on the floor real quick?

00:08:27.947 --> 00:08:32.923
I think Pat wants you to bend over and grab your ankles, including range of motion and pain.

00:08:32.923 --> 00:08:37.624
Here let's Before and after penetration Does missionary work for you?

00:08:37.624 --> 00:08:40.880
Once again, too long to answer.

00:08:40.880 --> 00:08:41.782
I prefer doggy.

00:08:42.082 --> 00:08:43.865
It's too late Check.

00:08:43.884 --> 00:08:46.989
Number three you are really not doing too well on this test right now.

00:08:46.989 --> 00:08:49.812
Yeah, all right, not only are you a cuss, but I think you're a homosexual.

00:08:49.812 --> 00:08:57.169
Evaluation of speech Well, we already know that You're slurring your words like a fucking drunken sailor.

00:08:57.169 --> 00:08:58.374
Oh, mitigate, propagate.

00:08:58.374 --> 00:08:59.979
What Obsession, obsessive.

00:08:59.979 --> 00:09:04.850
Woodford Reserve Exilophone Nope, once again, nothing.

00:09:05.812 --> 00:09:06.714
Word association.

00:09:08.650 --> 00:09:11.764
We're going to have to do a little observation of his gait.

00:09:13.147 --> 00:09:13.668
My walk.

00:09:14.811 --> 00:09:15.552
It's how you walk.

00:09:15.552 --> 00:09:16.462
Can you do me solid?

00:09:16.462 --> 00:09:18.741
Do you want to get in front of me and just walk back and forth a few times?

00:09:18.741 --> 00:09:25.188
Don't roll an ankle, and when you come towards me, just make sure you look at me and you spin real quick, but you keep looking at me.

00:09:25.470 --> 00:09:28.206
Like again, like is it fucking Tuesday already?

00:09:28.206 --> 00:09:29.570
It was so.

00:09:30.922 --> 00:09:31.423
Can you do that?

00:09:31.423 --> 00:09:32.886
Turn back and look at me like a dragon?

00:09:32.886 --> 00:09:35.533
All right, can you maybe give me a little hiss?

00:09:36.823 --> 00:09:37.746
One or two dragons.

00:09:38.168 --> 00:09:43.187
I move it, I move it, I move it and pulmonary exam.

00:09:43.187 --> 00:09:45.527
He's got a knot on his eyeball.

00:09:45.527 --> 00:09:48.929
So you are really not doing too well on this task, kev.

00:09:48.929 --> 00:09:50.524
I think you're concussed.

00:09:51.660 --> 00:09:57.253
If any elements are positive, inconclusive or suspicious of concussion.

00:09:57.253 --> 00:10:01.886
I wish we had a magic eight ball Player is escorted from the locker room.

00:10:01.886 --> 00:10:06.096
I wish we had an eight ball, kevin, unfortunately, since these are the rules that we follow and it says you have to be escorted to the locker room.

00:10:06.096 --> 00:10:06.417
I wish we had an eight ball, kevin.

00:10:06.417 --> 00:10:10.923
Unfortunately, since these are the rules that we follow and it says you have to be escorted to the locker room, we're going to have to take you upstairs.

00:10:11.506 --> 00:10:13.375
Oh shit, I'm fucking banned from the show.

00:10:13.375 --> 00:10:15.586
We got to do, we got to fucking follow the rules here.

00:10:15.759 --> 00:10:17.066
I can't get into the show.

00:10:17.066 --> 00:10:19.985
If we don't follow the rules, we get kicked off.

00:10:19.985 --> 00:10:24.957
If we're not going to follow the rules, how do we expect other people to follow the rules?

00:10:25.359 --> 00:10:29.847
Okay, I mean like, if you want, I'll go away.

00:10:32.748 --> 00:10:33.971
I mean, don't go away mad.

00:10:33.971 --> 00:10:35.410
You want to go to the bar?

00:10:35.410 --> 00:10:37.447
I think we should go to the bar.

00:10:37.447 --> 00:10:40.908
We'll do this all over again After the fucking ruckus.

00:10:40.908 --> 00:10:42.183
I'm not even going to lie to you.

00:10:42.183 --> 00:10:43.408
I want to get that guy's number.

00:10:43.408 --> 00:10:45.187
It's that guy.

00:10:45.187 --> 00:10:47.946
It's like no joke.

00:10:47.946 --> 00:10:50.568
Tonight was like an episode of Aggressive Seinfeld.

00:10:50.568 --> 00:10:52.865
Oh my god.

00:10:52.865 --> 00:10:57.171
It was just like a shit storm of stuff happening all at once.

00:10:57.171 --> 00:10:58.923
And now for a second, I just turned.

00:10:58.923 --> 00:11:00.923
I'm like I don't even know if this is real anymore.

00:11:00.923 --> 00:11:02.750
What's going on?

00:11:02.750 --> 00:11:06.288
This has been the most awkward evening ever.

00:11:06.360 --> 00:11:07.465
Yeah, a little bit.

00:11:07.465 --> 00:11:10.809
Well, I wouldn't say awkward, oh I would.

00:11:12.163 --> 00:11:23.052
I can say awkward, like awkwardly aggressive, yes, yeah, normally the most level-headed, laid-back, down-to-earth, relaxed guy.

00:11:23.052 --> 00:11:28.288
You got some pent up rage Fired the fuck up, can you imagine?

00:11:28.428 --> 00:11:34.649
I'm sorry when you fuck with my family like I'm fucking.

00:11:35.591 --> 00:11:36.133
But that's the.

00:11:36.133 --> 00:11:36.833
You know.

00:11:36.833 --> 00:11:39.886
I didn't really get the impression anyone was fucking with anybody.

00:11:39.886 --> 00:11:40.828
Yeah Well.

00:11:41.370 --> 00:11:44.408
Yeah, yeah, because you're on the outside.

00:11:44.408 --> 00:11:45.360
Well, it wasn't Because you're on the outside.

00:11:45.480 --> 00:11:52.308
Well, it wasn't, it wasn't it wasn't like you didn't get the text, like this guy's buying his drinks and we told him to leave and he won't leave us alone.

00:11:53.360 --> 00:12:00.287
No and honestly like, like that text is one text like, too long, like, like.

00:12:00.440 --> 00:12:02.206
Well, that text comes and we take a ride.

00:12:02.206 --> 00:12:04.322
I, I, I'm, I'm all in agreement for that.

00:12:04.403 --> 00:12:12.312
No, but I'm more the person that is like I'm there before that text happens, you know.

00:12:15.216 --> 00:12:19.265
What so when the apocalypse comes?

00:12:19.265 --> 00:12:20.509
Kevin's on my side.

00:12:20.509 --> 00:12:23.469
Well, I hope you're in the bubble with the rest of his family.

00:12:23.780 --> 00:12:31.027
You know what I mean, though, I'm ready to go before that fucking situation happens.

00:12:31.027 --> 00:12:38.861
There's something happening, right See?

00:12:39.023 --> 00:12:44.924
I could say this because my wife doesn't listen to the show, but I would love for someone to hit on my wife when she was out with her friends.

00:12:44.924 --> 00:12:47.748
No, I'm Kevin's side on that.

00:12:47.748 --> 00:12:50.745
No, I need like a little fucking.

00:12:50.745 --> 00:12:57.125
It's like you know, with the horses they bring like the stud horse.

00:12:57.164 --> 00:12:58.606
Okay, yeah, wait, time out, time out.

00:12:58.687 --> 00:12:59.548
I agree, wait a minute.

00:12:59.548 --> 00:13:00.389
I know, but wait a minute.

00:13:00.389 --> 00:13:03.153
He just made the analogy of him in a stud horse.

00:13:03.153 --> 00:13:05.535
Not me, oh, not me.

00:13:05.535 --> 00:13:16.063
You're talking about a black bull over the house banging the wife, not Barry Wood at my house and there's no banging at my house.

00:13:16.063 --> 00:13:17.589
I thought you were into the cuckold shit.

00:13:17.589 --> 00:13:20.201
No, oh, I thought that's what you were talking about Now.

00:13:20.221 --> 00:13:21.486
I'm getting fucking fired up.

00:13:21.486 --> 00:13:23.847
I am way off on that.

00:13:23.847 --> 00:13:25.845
This is your fault now.

00:13:25.845 --> 00:13:35.894
It's not mine, because I know exactly where you are in that boat, dude, because any shit like that happens, especially on my side, because of watering hole for herself.

00:13:35.894 --> 00:13:38.668
So I'm always like somebody's going to die.

00:13:38.668 --> 00:13:43.822
Tonight I was going with that thought in my head, but I go in calm, cool and collective like fucking Chuck Norris.

00:13:43.822 --> 00:13:44.283
You know what?

00:13:44.283 --> 00:13:49.849
Actually, this is the most awful thing ever because you're ready to kill people on a daily basis.

00:13:49.849 --> 00:13:51.850
I'm always angry.

00:13:51.850 --> 00:13:54.192
Now this fucking guy's starting to pick up this trait.

00:13:54.192 --> 00:13:55.494
No, I'm not.

00:13:55.494 --> 00:13:56.634
This is bad, dude.

00:13:56.634 --> 00:13:58.376
I'm not picking up the trait man.

00:13:59.279 --> 00:14:03.167
I'm just saying Mine is a real silent Rage that's inside.

00:14:03.167 --> 00:14:12.570
I think I've done the Thor thing of controlling it, because if there's ever a moment when it's needed, it's going down.

00:14:12.570 --> 00:14:22.914
Of course, him and I may be the secret to the apocalypse that we're the ones who fucking just throttle everybody.

00:14:22.914 --> 00:14:24.826
The apocalypse or the cockpocalypse?

00:14:24.826 --> 00:14:31.081
I don't know if I could live through a cockpocalypse so I'm going to be very obsessive over that.

00:14:31.322 --> 00:14:33.344
It sounds like pretty intense.

00:14:33.344 --> 00:14:33.986
I don't know, if.

00:14:33.986 --> 00:14:42.206
I could like dodging cocks that doesn't sound fun like I'll die, I'll die trying.

00:14:44.446 --> 00:14:46.571
Kevin just took a nine inincher to the head.

00:14:46.571 --> 00:14:46.951
He's done.

00:14:48.081 --> 00:14:49.125
Big black dick just killed him.

00:14:49.125 --> 00:14:52.370
You know I ain't laying down but I'll die trying.

00:14:52.370 --> 00:14:54.782
Now it's, it's all's just done.

00:14:54.822 --> 00:14:55.745
He's full of dicks.

00:14:55.745 --> 00:14:57.770
I don't know.

00:14:57.770 --> 00:14:58.606
I think it's a.

00:14:58.606 --> 00:15:02.143
To me it's like a superpower that I can control my rage because there's a.

00:15:02.143 --> 00:15:03.206
I know it's in there.

00:15:03.206 --> 00:15:06.932
I know it's in there, I know it's, but it's.

00:15:06.932 --> 00:15:09.668
I've just put it away until the right fucking time.

00:15:09.668 --> 00:15:14.889
So it may be when it's I have to save somebody's life, or the really wrong time.

00:15:15.332 --> 00:15:17.525
Well, yeah you're talking about the two dirt bikes.

00:15:17.525 --> 00:15:22.008
What I mean, is there ever really a wrong time for two dirt bikes?

00:15:22.008 --> 00:15:34.451
I mean, or it's during the apocalypse, and I have a crazy rage and I rage to the point of where I fucking black out and somebody fuck cold, clocks me and I'm done.

00:15:34.451 --> 00:15:36.624
Stupid, I should have kept my head on a swivel.

00:15:36.624 --> 00:15:37.907
You go berserker mode, dude.

00:15:37.907 --> 00:15:39.960
I mean, fuck it, I got fucking horse, dude.

00:15:40.059 --> 00:15:42.541
Ain't nobody cold cocking that melon bro?

00:15:42.640 --> 00:15:50.504
First of all, you're cold cocking it, your hand's broken, your wrist is broken and I'm probably giggling at you, so, yeah, I could take pretty good punches.

00:15:50.504 --> 00:15:53.946
Today, I usually do it like go down first.

00:15:53.946 --> 00:15:59.388
So if they try to punch me in the face and go like that I've heard that about you Crack, you, swallow, crack you, crack you.

00:15:59.388 --> 00:16:03.649
You have the phalanges, do you swallow while?

00:16:03.889 --> 00:16:04.750
you're down there?

00:16:04.889 --> 00:16:05.929
What day of the week are we talking about?

00:16:05.950 --> 00:16:08.510
You're taking a shot to the head like a wild Samoan.

00:16:08.510 --> 00:16:10.572
You're shaking that shit off.

00:16:10.611 --> 00:16:12.472
What did you just do?

00:16:12.472 --> 00:16:21.376
The best story I can tell you about the legend of this large cranium is we were on Lake Carmel one winter, oh sweet, and we were skating on the ice and I remember my legs went out from under me and my head fucking hits the ice.

00:16:21.376 --> 00:16:36.953
And I remember my legs went out from under me and my head fucking hits the ice first, where I saw stars and all you hear is no joke.

00:16:36.953 --> 00:16:44.313
This shit cracked like 12 inches down and I remember when I saw the stars I was like I got up, phil comes skating, you're all right, yeah, I'm good.

00:16:44.313 --> 00:16:44.754
And I just kept going.

00:16:44.754 --> 00:16:46.460
That was I was like ugh, I got up, phil comes skating, you alright, yeah, I'm good.

00:16:46.460 --> 00:16:47.639
And I just kept going.

00:16:47.639 --> 00:16:56.539
That was probably my first concussion in my life, but I was like fuck that man, I feel no pain, I'm gonna fucking do some figure skating, and that's where the CTE began.

00:16:56.539 --> 00:16:58.386
So I knocked off a fucking triple axel.

00:16:58.881 --> 00:17:02.827
Right after that, bam Oxana Bayou bro.

00:17:02.827 --> 00:17:05.296
I look like Oxana Bayou bro.

00:17:05.296 --> 00:17:08.680
That'll look like Oxana Bayou With the beard Dude.

00:17:08.680 --> 00:17:14.380
That's when I realized, no matter how hard I hit my head, there's times I fucking nail this motherfucker.

00:17:14.380 --> 00:17:15.506
It hurts a little bit.

00:17:15.506 --> 00:17:16.811
Then I'm like we're good.

00:17:18.038 --> 00:17:18.299
Oh yeah.

00:17:18.902 --> 00:17:21.509
Yeah, this thing's got some historic scars.

00:17:21.509 --> 00:17:24.208
Do you get knotted up like Kevin's face when you get hit?

00:17:24.208 --> 00:17:24.869
Wow, no, my face Really.

00:17:24.890 --> 00:17:25.211
Historic scars.

00:17:25.211 --> 00:17:27.357
Do you get knotted up like Kevin's face when you get hit?

00:17:27.357 --> 00:17:27.699
Wow, no, my face.

00:17:27.719 --> 00:17:27.900
Really no.

00:17:27.900 --> 00:17:29.388
I mean, you're a bleeder apparently.

00:17:29.388 --> 00:17:30.535
Well, you turned to me Jesus.

00:17:30.655 --> 00:17:31.240
Christ For a second.

00:17:32.463 --> 00:17:34.598
I thought you had cerebral palsy For a second when you turned to me.

00:17:34.598 --> 00:17:35.625
I'm like, oh my god, he's saggy.

00:17:35.625 --> 00:17:39.020
He's got little Bell's palsy going, little Bells.

00:17:39.020 --> 00:17:40.584
He's got little Bells on the left side side.

00:17:40.584 --> 00:17:42.648
Fuck you guys from the rage.

00:17:42.648 --> 00:17:46.298
Every time you get excited, I saw red.

00:17:46.298 --> 00:17:48.563
Every time I get excited, my left side sags.

00:17:48.563 --> 00:17:51.388
I saw red I can't believe my face right now.

00:17:51.388 --> 00:17:52.711
Okay, now listen.

00:17:53.031 --> 00:17:57.127
Well, it doesn't matter, kevin I still want you on my side during the apocalypse.

00:17:57.127 --> 00:18:15.056
So I'm gonna like you know, we're gonna keep you like a secret weapon, like you're gonna be Wolverine, but you're gonna come out with stop it, come out with steak knives taped to your fucking hands well, on one hand, and maybe forks on, am I killing?

00:18:15.056 --> 00:18:22.132
Forecast is locked up in here for months.

00:18:22.842 --> 00:18:25.653
Can't even check off at these things gears dude, oh yeah, like that rage been locked up in here for months.

00:18:25.653 --> 00:18:26.739
Can't even check off at these things.

00:18:26.739 --> 00:18:31.976
Gears dude, oh yeah, like that rage is locked up, rage Gears.

00:18:33.342 --> 00:18:46.375
I saw a comedian recently that opened up his bit with if you're ever in a bar fight with a guy over 40, you're in a lot of trouble Because you're not fighting that guy, you're fighting 30 years of pent up Rage.

00:18:46.577 --> 00:18:53.506
Oh my god, that's the point, like dude honestly, yeah, I love, I fear For the motherfucker.

00:18:53.707 --> 00:18:59.567
I would Love to have like a younger dude, but come on, fat old man, like I know that.

00:18:59.567 --> 00:19:01.285
Yeah, the Statue, yeah.

00:19:01.285 --> 00:19:02.742
That's pretty good.

00:19:02.742 --> 00:19:04.228
I know double chin there Fell.

00:19:04.228 --> 00:19:07.189
I know I'm going to kill you.

00:19:07.189 --> 00:19:09.548
Come on, let's go.

00:19:09.548 --> 00:19:10.762
I'm gonna hurt you something.

00:19:10.762 --> 00:19:12.606
Fear bar fucking, chair Fucking.

00:19:13.232 --> 00:19:23.987
Oh yeah yeah, you're getting Worked the fuck up like I fear Barstool across the fucking head For the motherfucker that crosses that line At that time with me.

00:19:24.761 --> 00:19:29.227
And I think for my first time I I'm going to start using feet and I'm going to start stomping motherfuckers.

00:19:29.227 --> 00:19:31.847
Bam right on the fucking chest, let's go.

00:19:31.847 --> 00:19:34.386
It's too much to even bend down to punch.

00:19:34.386 --> 00:19:35.088
That's what I'm saying.

00:19:35.088 --> 00:19:36.566
So somebody's got to fall down first.

00:19:36.566 --> 00:19:37.248
You're down.

00:19:37.248 --> 00:19:40.207
You better watch out for the feet, because I ain't bending over, I'll actually get dizzy.

00:19:40.207 --> 00:19:41.529
No, the feet just gotta go.

00:19:41.529 --> 00:19:42.692
I'll get dizzy when I get back up.

00:19:43.420 --> 00:19:44.682
I'm like whoa.

00:19:44.682 --> 00:19:50.887
And that's not from the drink, that's from the loss of oxygen just bending over and you don't think.

00:19:50.907 --> 00:19:51.579
I'm gonna fuck you up, young buck.

00:19:52.440 --> 00:19:53.402
You're done, bro.

00:19:53.402 --> 00:19:57.650
Yeah, I'm gonna need a bare aspirin before this starts so I don't have a heart attack.

00:19:57.650 --> 00:19:58.972
The diabetes takes over.

00:19:58.972 --> 00:20:01.902
Wait, I'm gonna take a shot of my insulin.

00:20:01.902 --> 00:20:02.604
You wait over there in the corner.

00:20:02.604 --> 00:20:03.906
Give me a second, I'll be right there.

00:20:03.906 --> 00:20:05.711
I need my B12 shot real quick.

00:20:05.711 --> 00:20:07.551
I'll be right there.

00:20:07.551 --> 00:20:10.928
Yeah, all right, it's going to be a few minutes, man.

00:20:10.928 --> 00:20:14.665
You know, let me stretch it out Because you know something stupid is going to happen.

00:20:14.665 --> 00:20:17.005
Like you slip, you fucking pull the groin.

00:20:17.840 --> 00:20:18.766
Oh, it's so embarrassing.

00:20:25.920 --> 00:20:27.068
Because then you get oh, time out, time out dude.

00:20:27.068 --> 00:20:28.538
Oh fuck, dude, give me a time out, man, remember my age, dude, no takes.

00:20:29.303 --> 00:20:30.346
Somebody got an age bandage.

00:20:30.346 --> 00:20:36.079
Oh boy, alright, we need to pull this back from Albuquerque.

00:20:36.079 --> 00:20:37.907
No, no, albuquerque is great dude.

00:20:37.907 --> 00:20:40.710
I'm gonna need an ice pack on this before I fight you, young buck.

00:20:40.710 --> 00:20:48.807
Oh God, oh, fuck, I can't, oh, so I, oh fuck, I can't, oh, so I was telling him a story the other day.

00:20:48.807 --> 00:21:02.451
So, ever since Jess has been back at work and everything, I guess she's all pissed off because people are like doing the work that she's supposed to be doing, like fucking everything up and talking all this shit and whatever.

00:21:02.451 --> 00:21:03.538
Oh, she's got to come back and lay down the law.

00:21:03.538 --> 00:21:04.837
So I pick her up one night talking all this shit and whatever.

00:21:04.837 --> 00:21:05.285
Oh, she's got to come back and lay down the law.

00:21:05.285 --> 00:21:08.269
So I pick her up one night.

00:21:08.380 --> 00:21:11.948
I saw the one that came out, the one I never liked in the first place.

00:21:11.948 --> 00:21:15.126
I call her One-Eyed Willie.

00:21:15.126 --> 00:21:18.333
I want to go there.

00:21:18.333 --> 00:21:21.486
I want to go there one night, just so I can be like, oh my God, that's you.

00:21:21.486 --> 00:21:22.944
No, well, here's the thing.

00:21:22.944 --> 00:21:24.895
Why, here's the thing, why do you?

00:21:24.895 --> 00:21:24.971
Why?

00:21:24.971 --> 00:21:25.316
Here's the thing.

00:21:25.290 --> 00:21:36.721
She actually, she had one eye, all right, and she was looking for an eye replacement or I, you know, prosthetic, like thor.

00:21:36.721 --> 00:21:41.646
Oh, I heard, yeah, yeah, totally not as powerful, though someone call rocky raccoon.

00:21:41.646 --> 00:21:49.056
Yeah, someone call Rocky Raccoon, yeah, so they get a donation together to get her eye.

00:21:49.056 --> 00:21:50.298
And I'm like, wait a minute.

00:21:50.298 --> 00:21:53.380
I was like you guys collected fucking money for a fake eye.

00:21:53.380 --> 00:22:02.467
I was like that's not a cosmetic fucking surgery because of what happened to it, and I was like that should be covered under the insurance.

00:22:02.467 --> 00:22:03.410
She's like, no, she said it wasn't.

00:22:03.410 --> 00:22:04.585
I was like, oh, so you believed her word.

00:22:04.585 --> 00:22:08.630
Oh so you think that she got it done under insurance and took the money and ran.

00:22:08.630 --> 00:22:11.671
She got fucking $2,500.

00:22:13.101 --> 00:22:19.865
Then, lo and behold, that happens right, and Jess is at work.

00:22:19.865 --> 00:22:20.807
She's like I have a party today.

00:22:20.807 --> 00:22:22.673
I'm like, okay, she texts me.

00:22:22.673 --> 00:22:26.910
She's like like I am going to Fucking kill somebody.

00:22:26.910 --> 00:22:29.988
I'm like, and she Never, ever texts me from work Saying that she's pissed off or she wants to kill somebody.

00:22:29.988 --> 00:22:32.909
She's telling me the story.

00:22:32.909 --> 00:22:38.690
So she Does the waitress thing on the waitress Sides and parties or whatever, and it Was a kids party.

00:22:38.690 --> 00:22:45.046
The one eyed willie, who's not a who's not a waitress.

00:22:45.046 --> 00:22:49.226
Well, I mean, I gotta imagine your whole fucking balance is off.

00:22:49.226 --> 00:22:50.289
Oh, totally, I mean her.

00:22:50.289 --> 00:22:54.546
Yeah, you're definitely walking at an angle and Shit on the floor.

00:22:54.546 --> 00:22:58.440
But since day one I told her I was like I don't, I don't trust this fucking chick whatsoever.

00:22:58.440 --> 00:23:01.406
And she came in, she's got one eye.

00:23:01.567 --> 00:23:02.249
Yeah but you don't.

00:23:02.249 --> 00:23:03.251
You never fucking.

00:23:03.251 --> 00:23:04.924
First of all, here's the fucking rule.

00:23:04.924 --> 00:23:07.740
Honestly, she's a fucking pirate.

00:23:07.740 --> 00:23:08.940
You never trust a pirate.

00:23:09.823 --> 00:23:12.486
The first red flag is Was there an eye patch?

00:23:13.701 --> 00:23:14.384
For some time.

00:23:14.384 --> 00:23:17.819
Then there was an empty socket.

00:23:18.936 --> 00:23:20.907
Oh, no, she just walked around with an empty socket.

00:23:20.980 --> 00:23:29.689
No, the eyelid was just covering it, so she had the eyelid there but no eye, so we almost look like a mini vagina.

00:23:29.689 --> 00:23:31.405
Dude, she was a waitress.

00:23:31.405 --> 00:23:33.086
No, she only did the front.

00:23:33.086 --> 00:23:35.987
She did when people came in and ordered, she did the front.

00:23:35.987 --> 00:23:36.970
Oh my God.

00:23:36.970 --> 00:23:40.167
Oh my God, did anyone skull fuck her when she had no eye?

00:23:40.560 --> 00:23:42.407
She should have been on the fryer.

00:23:42.407 --> 00:23:48.989
You know, Like you don't put that person in the front.

00:23:52.049 --> 00:23:53.420
You are not the face of the franchise.

00:23:53.420 --> 00:23:55.467
Like, are you fucking kidding me?

00:23:55.467 --> 00:23:58.185
You're on the front, stand by the soda machine.

00:23:58.185 --> 00:23:59.566
Who's running this joint?

00:23:59.566 --> 00:24:01.567
Hey sloth, get out back by the garbage.

00:24:01.567 --> 00:24:04.365
Oh sloth, oh my God, so Jess is.

00:24:04.365 --> 00:24:04.672
But what Sloth?

00:24:04.672 --> 00:24:05.119
Oh my God, so Jess is.

00:24:05.119 --> 00:24:08.069
But what happened was when she was out there.

00:24:09.200 --> 00:24:10.303
Fucking Sloth.

00:24:10.303 --> 00:24:12.169
Oh my God, I'm sorry.

00:24:12.169 --> 00:24:12.931
Listen, Cyclops.

00:24:14.421 --> 00:24:16.227
Listen, Cyclops, you motherfucker, you.

00:24:16.468 --> 00:24:17.028
Oh my.

00:24:17.048 --> 00:24:17.210
God.

00:24:17.210 --> 00:24:25.736
So when Jess was gone because of the cancer and everything, like, people started doing her jobs, of course, and she informed them.

00:24:25.736 --> 00:24:31.900
She's like, when I come back, she's like I'm taking over all the duties, this and that, and I guess there was like some shit talked and blah, blah, blah.

00:24:31.900 --> 00:24:42.643
And then the person she thought was such a best friend of hers was fucking talking all this shit, fucking up all the orders, whatever, because she wanted to fuck up.

00:24:42.643 --> 00:25:00.785
So Jess would leave or George would fire her in order to take jess's spot ah, a little positioning, so so she, she, she catches wind of this and, of course, when she's, when she's explaining it to me, she is three sheets to the wind, okay.

00:25:01.045 --> 00:25:06.094
So when I knew this, this whole situation started, I was I am going to have so much fun with this right now.

00:25:06.094 --> 00:25:11.028
So I'm like I'm going to do this so nice, I'm not going to say anything, mean, I'm going to support her.

00:25:11.028 --> 00:25:13.788
But I was like I'll throw my zingers in there when I need to.

00:25:13.788 --> 00:25:18.448
And she's like you had no idea how angry I am.

00:25:18.448 --> 00:25:22.839
I was like oh no, you look so angry.

00:25:22.839 --> 00:25:23.960
You didn't drink tonight.

00:25:23.960 --> 00:25:25.221
Okay, don't even worry about it.

00:25:25.221 --> 00:25:26.282
What happened?

00:25:26.282 --> 00:25:29.567
87.

00:25:32.090 --> 00:25:33.813
What no?

00:25:33.813 --> 00:25:36.717
One night, one night oh.

00:25:38.040 --> 00:25:42.050
I don't want to be the guy, but I told you so she just starts.

00:25:42.050 --> 00:25:44.770
She's like I know she starts doing this fucking thing.

00:25:44.770 --> 00:25:46.021
She starts like doing this Fucking thing.

00:25:46.021 --> 00:25:52.085
I'm like this is really Because it was almost a similar Thing to what Kevin was going through, a little drunken.

00:25:52.085 --> 00:25:53.905
Oh, is that why you were able to take Charge yet?

00:25:53.905 --> 00:25:55.019
Because you've seen that happen.

00:25:55.019 --> 00:25:57.559
Oh, yes, yes, that's why I was trying to help him in that situation.

00:25:57.559 --> 00:26:06.048
So I saw it first and I Knew the signs and I was like one friend to another, I'm stepping in and helping out.

00:26:06.048 --> 00:26:08.440
First sign alcohol problem.

00:26:08.440 --> 00:26:11.968
Second sign Dude, and then.

00:26:11.968 --> 00:26:18.247
But it got to the point of where and she even said when she was sober, she's like I should listen to you.

00:26:18.247 --> 00:26:19.849
I'm like, yeah, I don't know if you've noticed.

00:26:20.092 --> 00:26:29.911
The past 10 years We've been together I have said some memorable stuff and they've all been good and you've shit on me.

00:26:29.911 --> 00:26:33.167
Every single one I've had some world class.

00:26:33.167 --> 00:26:43.200
You know, I knew when I people you don't trust and you trusted her when she told me they donated money, I lost my fucking marbles.

00:26:43.200 --> 00:26:47.747
I'm like you couldn't find a fucking cue ball or something to fucking rough up a little bit.

00:26:47.747 --> 00:26:51.424
Color that in, maybe have one of the little Spanish kids fucking paint it.

00:26:51.424 --> 00:26:55.111
I mean, not for nothing, but if I lost an eye I'd want the little fucking eight ball thing.

00:26:55.111 --> 00:27:00.462
No dude, if I ever lost an eye I want one with like skull, fucking crossbones.

00:27:00.462 --> 00:27:00.824
Doctor.

00:27:02.401 --> 00:27:02.701
Death.

00:27:02.701 --> 00:27:08.147
I would totally take an eye patch and walk away Like give me the eye patch forever.

00:27:08.147 --> 00:27:09.744
You know it's badass.

00:27:11.063 --> 00:27:12.459
That's just because you want the extra orifice.

00:27:12.459 --> 00:27:16.230
Dude what's badass is you've got balls to walk around with an empty socket.

00:27:16.480 --> 00:27:20.290
It's badass and like people see you, they have questions, you know.

00:27:21.921 --> 00:27:30.303
Kevin walked down the street With his eye patch on One thousand a shot to fuck him in the skull when his eye used to be.

00:27:30.804 --> 00:27:33.471
What Huh?

00:27:34.381 --> 00:27:35.144
What was that?

00:27:35.144 --> 00:27:36.949
We were on a fucking roll.

00:27:36.949 --> 00:27:41.770
Dude, god Dude, he was riffing.

00:27:42.804 --> 00:27:43.586
We were fucking good man.

00:27:44.059 --> 00:27:50.054
I honestly thought he was going to pull a guitar out and be like Right, very good, he just went fucking Albuquerque, right there, man.

00:27:50.054 --> 00:27:52.284
Man, that would have been fucking Dude.

00:27:52.284 --> 00:27:53.146
You'd be king of the lot.

00:27:53.146 --> 00:27:55.425
Lizards Fucking glory holes.

00:27:55.425 --> 00:27:57.667
They say his name is Kevin.

00:27:57.667 --> 00:27:59.788
You made a lot of money with that.

00:28:02.732 --> 00:28:03.919
King of the lot lizards.

00:28:07.460 --> 00:28:08.423
I am king of the lot lizards.

00:28:08.423 --> 00:28:12.906
Can you not say that and slur and pull away at the same time, because that really does not make you look truthful.

00:28:12.906 --> 00:28:17.048
I'm the king of the lot lizards.

00:28:17.048 --> 00:28:23.896
If any of you don't know what lot lizards are, call poor Thor.

00:28:23.896 --> 00:28:24.993
It's very simple, because we have no problem explaining it to you.

00:28:24.993 --> 00:28:26.093
If any of you don't know what lot lizards are, call Porthor.

00:28:26.473 --> 00:28:28.836
It's very simple because we have no problem explaining it to you.

00:28:28.836 --> 00:28:29.923
So, lot lizards.

00:28:29.923 --> 00:28:35.771
Are you familiar with rest areas?

00:28:35.771 --> 00:28:51.281
I know, I know they get the whole gay glory, but there's lot lizards who are hookers, who will pretty much put their their vagine on anything like out in the parking lot, in the open.

00:28:51.281 --> 00:28:54.448
Hence, lot on vacation lizard.

00:28:54.448 --> 00:28:57.953
Yes, yeah, and you're going to want to stay away from them.

00:28:57.953 --> 00:29:03.808
I heard they're poisonous, I mean, unless you're driving a truck for 47 hours and maybe you need a little release.

00:29:03.808 --> 00:29:09.780
That was loud, yeah, oh, how do you mark this window?

00:29:09.780 --> 00:29:11.503
All right, so you know it's on that end.

00:29:11.503 --> 00:29:14.067
That fucking fucked my ear up, bro Shit.

00:29:14.067 --> 00:29:19.394
All right, so it has been confirmed through multiple sources.

00:29:22.079 --> 00:29:22.721
I'm going to be a fear monger.

00:29:22.721 --> 00:29:32.192
Come pretty much January 19th or January 20th, there's going to be a swarm of suicide vesters.

00:29:32.192 --> 00:29:35.647
Sounds like a weird porn movie.

00:29:35.647 --> 00:29:40.247
Is that going to star Mia Khalifa?

00:29:40.247 --> 00:29:44.463
Yeah, I mean possibly.

00:29:44.463 --> 00:29:45.426
Yeah, because she could do that.

00:29:45.426 --> 00:29:45.989
Because she does.

00:29:45.989 --> 00:29:46.770
She is one of those.

00:29:46.770 --> 00:29:48.185
She puts the EJ everything.

00:29:48.185 --> 00:29:56.954
She has a suicide jacket full of dills and butt plugs.

00:30:00.374 --> 00:30:00.979
Is there glitter?

00:30:01.559 --> 00:30:03.327
She's going to play the Danish trail role.

00:30:03.327 --> 00:30:04.766
No, she has marble butt plugs.

00:30:05.039 --> 00:30:05.527
Is there glitter?

00:30:05.440 --> 00:30:06.047
involved and there to play the Danny Shale role.

00:30:06.047 --> 00:30:06.374
She has marble butt plugs.

00:30:06.374 --> 00:30:06.567
Is there glitter involved?

00:30:06.567 --> 00:30:23.528
There's actually a glitter bomb in that, so they say when it goes off, the glass butt plugs will go through the people and the glitter gets into the wound Instant infection.

00:30:23.528 --> 00:30:29.846
It's one of the greatest devices of all time the Vagin Bomb.

00:30:29.846 --> 00:30:34.010
She's going to play the Danny Trejo role from Desperado.

00:30:34.980 --> 00:30:36.304
It's called a massing gill.

00:30:36.483 --> 00:30:40.794
Yeah, oh God, can you imagine that Douche?

00:30:41.642 --> 00:30:42.144
How'd he die.

00:30:42.163 --> 00:30:45.165
Yeah, the dildo suicide bomber.

00:30:45.165 --> 00:30:46.169
Yeah, you didn't hear about that.

00:30:46.169 --> 00:30:49.909
Marble and glass dildos, butt plugs and everything.

00:30:49.909 --> 00:30:52.685
Ky was mixed in there.

00:30:52.685 --> 00:30:54.847
Motherfucker got an infection so bad with that glitter.

00:30:54.847 --> 00:30:57.586
Looked like Tommy O back in the day.

00:30:58.932 --> 00:31:00.317
Oh, no, oh God.

00:31:01.462 --> 00:31:06.268
His first walk on the fucking walkway With the glitter bomb, tommy.

00:31:06.307 --> 00:31:06.327
O.

00:31:07.380 --> 00:31:16.275
So there's actually talk of this CIA targeter, can you?

00:31:16.275 --> 00:31:21.086
It still makes me laugh, dude, it still makes me laugh.

00:31:21.086 --> 00:31:24.087
Oh, you're Tommy O your theme song.

00:31:24.087 --> 00:31:25.461
I love it, fucking.

00:31:25.461 --> 00:31:27.164
You're Tommy O, your theme song.

00:31:27.164 --> 00:31:30.450
I love it, fucking love it Big shot, big shot.

00:31:30.450 --> 00:31:32.934
Big shot.

00:31:32.934 --> 00:31:34.625
Yeah, you and your leather chaps.

00:31:34.665 --> 00:31:36.261
Shut up, dude.

00:31:36.261 --> 00:31:37.467
Tommy O is a terrorist.

00:31:39.441 --> 00:31:43.271
He fucking can be, if you saw him in a pair of assless chaps with a glitter.

00:31:43.291 --> 00:31:44.577
That's that first one With a glitter.

00:31:44.577 --> 00:31:45.019
Fanny pack.

00:31:45.099 --> 00:31:47.528
A gentleman like himself walking around with assless chaps.

00:31:47.528 --> 00:31:51.967
Your first thought is terrorist, because no normal man would do that.

00:31:51.967 --> 00:31:53.306
He's terrorizing somebody.

00:31:53.306 --> 00:31:55.659
I'm not sure who it was, but he was terrorizing somebody.

00:31:55.659 --> 00:31:57.487
The fucking local elders.

00:31:57.487 --> 00:32:01.869
Put that hand bone back in your pocket, bro.

00:32:01.869 --> 00:32:07.200
Seriously, the fucking 90-year-old lady just died from that Fucking guy's getting kicked out of Florida.

00:32:07.200 --> 00:32:10.130
He swung a glitter bomb at me with his dick.

00:32:10.130 --> 00:32:14.046
Now we're in Albuquerque.

00:32:15.741 --> 00:32:21.150
That was good, that was good, but there's actual All right serious now.

00:32:21.150 --> 00:32:46.068
So there was this CIA targeter, whistleblower, yeah, who was on Sean Ryan show and she confirmed that the US has information, plausible information that even though January 9th passed she said there's three dates to be weary of it's the 19th of January, the 20th of January and the 9th of January, but that already passed.

00:32:46.068 --> 00:32:52.113
That the possibility of this thing called a swarm by Al-Qaeda.

00:32:52.113 --> 00:33:12.333
That there's so many sleeper cells in the United States who are planning this huge attack where suicide bombers with vests throughout the United States deploy their fucking vests on either the 19th of January or the 20th.

00:33:12.333 --> 00:33:23.664
And can you imagine that happens January 20th in Washington DC On James Earl Ray Day that's what they call in the South.

00:33:24.647 --> 00:33:24.888
Well.

00:33:30.320 --> 00:33:31.545
I got to get on the pads right here.

00:33:31.545 --> 00:33:49.279
You know I do it's a direction you can fuck, but she was Just adamant about it and the fact that she kept on saying the government Knows about this and they've known of these cells.

00:33:49.279 --> 00:33:51.488
They just don't know where they are.

00:33:51.488 --> 00:34:01.868
So then, like knowing that, how do you have all that information and you know where?

00:34:01.868 --> 00:34:04.000
You know that's supposed to be happening.

00:34:04.000 --> 00:34:09.025
You know they call it the swarm and they have these high-tech vests now that get through metal detectors.

00:34:09.025 --> 00:34:10.324
Is this really just a?

00:34:10.324 --> 00:34:12.530
Could it just be a scare tactic?

00:34:12.530 --> 00:34:15.909
Here's the reason why I don't think so.

00:34:15.909 --> 00:34:18.659
Maybe, though I'm trying to remember the guy's name.

00:34:18.659 --> 00:34:21.009
I mean, the CIA don't have a real good track record lately.

00:34:21.009 --> 00:34:22.985
Yeah, it's not looking good.

00:34:22.985 --> 00:34:24.465
I mean, let's be honest.

00:34:25.460 --> 00:34:26.766
Nor the FBI either.

00:34:27.079 --> 00:34:31.427
Well, the FBI have been famous but incompetent for eons at this point.

00:34:31.427 --> 00:34:35.603
So there's this dude.

00:34:35.623 --> 00:34:36.306
I like that right.

00:34:36.306 --> 00:34:41.835
Yeah, yeah, Like I don't know if he got it, but I got it.

00:34:41.896 --> 00:34:42.519
Dude, I don't even know.

00:34:42.519 --> 00:34:44.646
I'm doing circles in my own head right now.

00:34:44.646 --> 00:34:48.487
Fbi Famous but incompetent.

00:34:48.487 --> 00:34:53.168
That's good, right, you're smiling really hard for that one.

00:34:53.168 --> 00:34:54.490
That's one of my favorites.

00:34:55.800 --> 00:34:58.759
I'm saying he is, I've been saying that for years.

00:34:59.440 --> 00:35:02.768
So I'm trying to remember this guy's name that Rogan was talking about.

00:35:02.768 --> 00:35:05.621
Where this guy, everybody thought he was a this lunatic.

00:35:05.621 --> 00:35:07.106
He has nothing to do with politics.

00:35:07.106 --> 00:35:16.262
He was on social media and he made these predictions about trump and all of them came true.

00:35:16.262 --> 00:35:36.878
Like prior to everything happening right, and before I saw the CIA thing, I heard about this guy and he brought up January 19th, january 20th, a supposed attack on the United States from Al Qaeda.

00:35:36.878 --> 00:35:48.989
Then I hear it from the CIA targeter and I was like wait a minute, when was the video when he said this?

00:35:48.989 --> 00:35:49.920
And he said this fucking way before she did?

00:35:49.920 --> 00:36:01.282
How does a guy who's not affiliated with the government whatsoever, not affiliated with politics, fucking Joe Schmo on Instagram or on whatever TikTok, whatever it is?

00:36:01.282 --> 00:36:03.746
How is he getting all this shit right?

00:36:03.746 --> 00:36:08.802
And and how come he said what she said but he said it before she did?

00:36:08.802 --> 00:36:13.896
I don't have an answer to that.

00:36:13.896 --> 00:36:19.516
That's where I'm a little concerned, because I was supposed to go to Jersey Monday?

00:36:19.610 --> 00:36:22.478
Should I not drive over bridges on Monday?

00:36:22.478 --> 00:36:24.856
Probably no, and you know what?

00:36:24.856 --> 00:36:25.632
I don't know.

00:36:25.632 --> 00:36:33.815
If that, that probably would not fucking surprise me, whatsoever, whatsoever.

00:36:33.815 --> 00:36:39.871
I'm just gonna be like fuck, I knew, you, knew it, knew it all right, yeah, this is the end of the world.

00:36:39.871 --> 00:36:41.153
World war three.

00:36:41.153 --> 00:36:44.059
Oh, let's get a bunch of fucking.

00:36:44.059 --> 00:36:49.057
Uh, people, we can pay their families because they're going to be suicide bombers.

00:36:49.057 --> 00:36:51.695
Let's go get them and start a war.

00:36:51.695 --> 00:37:00.815
You think the government would go to extremes like that in order for them not to switch power on the 20th?

00:37:00.815 --> 00:37:08.050
Yeah, maybe, yeah, it doesn't sound crazy to me, not?

00:37:08.070 --> 00:37:16.097
no, it's not far-fetched, it doesn't sound great to me Like not no, it's not far-fetched, it's not a no, it's the 25th.

00:37:16.137 --> 00:37:17.313
Amendment, isn't it?

00:37:17.313 --> 00:37:18.277
But let's be honest.

00:37:18.277 --> 00:37:27.936
If something like that happens and they push that button, somebody has to shoot Joe Biden in the face because they don't want him around anymore and they gotta instill that cackling hyena.

00:37:27.936 --> 00:37:31.092
I don't know.

00:37:31.092 --> 00:37:35.699
I think that's when the NWO steps in.

00:37:35.699 --> 00:37:38.699
If they can't implement Scott Hall, they're right.

00:37:41.996 --> 00:37:42.398
First of all.

00:37:42.831 --> 00:37:44.791
Once I see Hollywood Hogan, he's dead.

00:37:44.791 --> 00:37:46.476
Him and I are going to have some words.

00:37:46.476 --> 00:37:48.201
That's going to be my first.

00:37:49.153 --> 00:37:49.916
Kevin Nash.

00:37:49.916 --> 00:37:51.998
What are we talking here?

00:37:54.798 --> 00:37:58.070
First of all, we're not getting into the Razor Ramon thing again.

00:37:58.070 --> 00:38:01.389
We know your feelings towards him and your supposed legend.

00:38:01.751 --> 00:38:02.675
I love him man.

00:38:03.056 --> 00:38:05.349
He's great, the legend of three beers.

00:38:05.349 --> 00:38:09.771
I was going up to Milhouse for a network meeting and he starts talking about you know what three beers.

00:38:09.771 --> 00:38:13.293
Yeah, I was telling him I was going up to Mill House for a network meeting and he starts talking about you know what.

00:38:13.293 --> 00:38:21.231
Then you can go to the Civic Center and if you go to this door, I was thrown more than 10 feet.

00:38:21.231 --> 00:38:25.599
Oh, remember when we were talking about that, I was like I got my tape measure in the fucking car.

00:38:25.599 --> 00:38:31.431
Yeah, I totally fucking forgot to go, oh Fuck you man, I you man I dropped the ball on that.

00:38:31.570 --> 00:38:32.472
Come on man.

00:38:32.472 --> 00:38:35.440
Uh, that would have gotten done easily.

00:38:35.440 --> 00:38:37.969
Next thing I go and measure, I'm like dude.

00:38:37.969 --> 00:38:40.255
It's like fucking three feet dude.

00:38:40.255 --> 00:38:42.780
There's no way to get anyone more than first.

00:38:42.800 --> 00:38:45.693
There's no curb here it's.

00:38:45.693 --> 00:38:48.139
It's not three feet man, it's.

00:38:48.440 --> 00:38:49.722
I'm trying to remember what it looks like.

00:38:49.722 --> 00:38:51.155
I know exactly what you're talking about too.

00:38:52.150 --> 00:38:57.922
Like there were three people that actually threw me out of that place.

00:38:59.070 --> 00:39:00.521
Well, that's what you get for getting caught.

00:39:00.521 --> 00:39:01.630
You got sloppy.

00:39:01.630 --> 00:39:07.735
That's like when we were kids back in the day your friend would grab your hands, your friend would grab your feet, swing you back and forth, throw you into the fucking pool or something.

00:39:08.056 --> 00:39:11.503
Or you always Grab your feet, swing you back and forth throw you into the fucking pool or something.

00:39:11.523 --> 00:39:17.476
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you always pick on the little friends, yeah, but you wanted to pick on Matt but he was too heavy when he was little, oh, I was like you just jump in, motherfucker, jumping on your own.

00:39:17.596 --> 00:39:24.811
But yeah, that was children we're talking about grown men, I know.

00:39:24.831 --> 00:39:28.054
So instead of that, we just throw beers at fucking wrestlers, that's it.

00:39:31.099 --> 00:39:31.518
Anyways.

00:39:32.300 --> 00:39:37.907
I just I really do want to see how far it is, because I mean your level of exaggeration on things at times.

00:39:37.907 --> 00:39:39.655
Dude, you had the fucking.

00:39:39.655 --> 00:39:40.438
I know I did.

00:39:40.438 --> 00:39:41.632
I said I dropped the ball.

00:39:41.632 --> 00:39:42.215
You blew it, man.

00:39:42.215 --> 00:39:43.659
Sorry, I did, I did.

00:39:43.659 --> 00:39:48.298
You didn't drop the ball, I just totally forgot about it when I was up there man, I did not blow it.

00:39:48.539 --> 00:39:55.277
Yeah, you did dude, because she blew it.

00:39:55.277 --> 00:39:57.940
I did not blow it, I did not.

00:39:58.780 --> 00:40:08.735
You did like you were there put him in the fucking bed, get him out of here, come on like that's what they said when he threw his third beer like, were you not there?

00:40:09.797 --> 00:40:09.858
I?

00:40:09.898 --> 00:40:10.699
Was at Milhouse.

00:40:11.710 --> 00:40:12.614
Which is like.

00:40:13.215 --> 00:40:15.300
I know and I just totally forgot, like I just said.

00:40:16.231 --> 00:40:24.695
So I don't understand why you're still questioning me on this not questioning, I'm just saying you were there, you blew it I know I said yes, I admitted that.

00:40:24.715 --> 00:40:25.739
See, this is how I get rid of the anger and rage.

00:40:25.739 --> 00:40:26.179
I do admit my wrongs.

00:40:26.179 --> 00:40:26.380
It's it's.

00:40:26.380 --> 00:40:27.503
It's kind of enthralling to be honest with you.

00:40:27.503 --> 00:40:27.664
Really.

00:40:27.664 --> 00:40:28.847
See, this is how I get rid of the anger and rage.

00:40:28.847 --> 00:40:29.530
I do admit my wrongs.

00:40:29.530 --> 00:40:34.338
It's kind of enthralling really can you ever admit that you're wrong?

00:40:35.675 --> 00:40:40.159
I can yeah say it say it, say you're wrong.

00:40:41.485 --> 00:40:55.750
I have many times many times what that I was wrong have you ever said I was wrong and I'm sorry?

00:40:55.750 --> 00:40:58.932
Um, I don't believe it.

00:40:58.932 --> 00:41:08.902
You're thinking about that way too long no, I haven't Patrick, you know.

00:41:08.902 --> 00:41:13.545
Kevin is like Kevin's not always right, but he's never wrong.

00:41:13.545 --> 00:41:16.052
Yeah, I know, thank you miss 60 percent of the time.

00:41:16.052 --> 00:41:20.983
It works all the time it's a little Black Panther for you.

00:41:20.983 --> 00:41:23.233
Little Black Panther.

00:41:23.233 --> 00:41:26.777
Oh my god, smells like Bigfoot's dick.

00:41:26.777 --> 00:41:34.666
Dude you don't remember that In Anchorman I do.

00:41:39.371 --> 00:41:42.847
It was quiet, though in the background and it was a chick who said oh my God, smells like Bigfoot's dick.

00:41:42.847 --> 00:41:43.369
It's pungent.

00:41:43.369 --> 00:41:50.521
Smells like Indian food in a baby's diaper that's pungent Fucking Paul.

00:41:50.543 --> 00:41:51.804
Rudd Stinks and nods.

00:41:54.610 --> 00:41:56.798
What a great fucking movie, dude Classic.

00:41:56.798 --> 00:41:59.815
I watched Another one they can't make today.

00:41:59.815 --> 00:42:02.956
No, I was just going to say that because I watched Tropic Thunder the other night.

00:42:02.956 --> 00:42:05.795
Oh, love it, love it, love it.

00:42:05.795 --> 00:42:06.599
It's crazy.

00:42:06.599 --> 00:42:12.780
That movie's not even old and what's in that movie we'll never, ever be able to put into a movie again.

00:42:12.780 --> 00:42:14.130
I'm amazed they even put it on cable anymore.

00:42:14.130 --> 00:42:18.481
That should be our niche.

00:42:18.481 --> 00:42:19.001
Dead serious.

00:42:19.001 --> 00:42:20.795
Which one's going in blackface?

00:42:20.795 --> 00:42:25.619
No, we should do shit that used to get done.

00:42:25.619 --> 00:42:27.730
It's not racist.

00:42:27.730 --> 00:42:36.858
I'm not looking to do funny shit because it's comical and it's not to hurt anybody's fucking feelings, but everybody's taking the fun away To make people laugh.

00:42:36.858 --> 00:42:38.335
We're here to make people laugh.

00:42:38.335 --> 00:42:48.045
God, I think we should be like the jesters back in the medieval days, just walking around Minstrels, what, what?

00:42:48.045 --> 00:42:49.634
I don't know what he said.

00:42:49.634 --> 00:42:53.271
I said medieval, I said menstruals, menstruals.

00:42:53.271 --> 00:42:55.137
What does menstruation have to do with this?

00:42:55.137 --> 00:42:57.434
That's what they're called.

00:42:57.434 --> 00:42:58.498
Jesters are called menstruals.

00:42:59.791 --> 00:43:00.574
No, but like.

00:43:00.574 --> 00:43:05.771
They're just sort of like obsessive obsession Intertwined.

00:43:05.771 --> 00:43:07.875
You know what they're?

00:43:07.875 --> 00:43:08.777
The same but different.

00:43:09.670 --> 00:43:10.534
Dude, this is.

00:43:10.534 --> 00:43:12.677
This is where he goes into his Jedi mind.

00:43:12.677 --> 00:43:18.161
Shit right now, because I'm like this is another one, my obsessive.

00:43:18.161 --> 00:43:25.132
Okay, don't ask him to tell a story, ladies and gentlemen, if we have anybody out there listening.

00:43:25.293 --> 00:43:28.367
I know you're not, it's okay, I'm listening, right?

00:43:28.367 --> 00:43:31.201
Yeah, so what you want to do is you want to give us a call?

00:43:31.201 --> 00:43:36.800
845-852 I don't remember the rest.

00:43:36.800 --> 00:43:40.757
We're the only show that forgets our fucking number.

00:43:40.757 --> 00:43:41.639
That's great.

00:43:41.639 --> 00:43:44.447
845-842-1652.

00:43:44.447 --> 00:43:46.411
There you go, we'll call you back Once again.

00:43:46.411 --> 00:43:52.722
Yeah, if you leave a message, we'll call you back 845-842-1652.

00:43:52.722 --> 00:43:53.744
Where's Matt?

00:43:53.744 --> 00:43:54.804
Where are you going, matty?

00:43:55.230 --> 00:43:56.476
This is fucking exit stage.

00:43:56.476 --> 00:43:59.579
Right, he's like beyond the trophies.

00:44:01.072 --> 00:44:01.996
So what was I even saying again?

00:44:01.996 --> 00:44:04.152
Does it even matter?

00:44:04.152 --> 00:44:06.659
Fuck Shit.

00:44:06.659 --> 00:44:10.018
All right, what the fuck were we talking about?

00:44:10.018 --> 00:44:13.291
We went from terrorist attacks to Tropic Thunder.

00:44:13.291 --> 00:44:16.137
Oh, yes, yes, I still don't remember.

00:44:16.137 --> 00:44:19.831
We're good, we are good.

00:44:19.831 --> 00:44:20.532
What's wrong with you?

00:44:20.532 --> 00:44:22.478
Nothing's wrong with me.

00:44:22.478 --> 00:44:25.936
Okay, I'm on a fucking two-day bender.

00:44:25.936 --> 00:44:27.751
I need to get some sleep Now, okay.

00:44:27.751 --> 00:44:28.996
So here's my question Now.

00:44:28.996 --> 00:44:36.063
If so, here's my question Now if that does happen on the 20th, what's your reaction going to be?

00:44:36.063 --> 00:44:39.115
Do you think like?

00:44:39.297 --> 00:44:39.317
a-.

00:44:39.550 --> 00:44:40.574
It actually happening?

00:44:41.036 --> 00:44:43.661
No, not happening, if it does happen?

00:44:44.192 --> 00:44:50.378
Right, if it does happen, what is your first action when you hear about it?

00:44:50.378 --> 00:44:50.898
What are you doing?

00:44:50.898 --> 00:44:57.077
Patty Kevin likes to save the best for last.

00:44:57.077 --> 00:45:07.336
I'm going to be at RP Prime in Fairlawn eating a fucking porterhouse for two, so Matt's going to be like I'm probably going to have some scotch Matt's going to be like I'm finishing my dinner, then I'm out.

00:45:07.336 --> 00:45:08.681
Well, I'm going to finish.

00:45:08.681 --> 00:45:10.228
I mean Fairlawn's not getting.

00:45:11.112 --> 00:45:11.655
Fairlawn.

00:45:11.916 --> 00:45:13.373
That's from Die Hard.

00:45:13.373 --> 00:45:15.655
No, that's not Nakatomi Plus.

00:45:15.655 --> 00:45:16.771
No, no, no, die Hard.

00:45:16.771 --> 00:45:21.675
Oh, yes, fairlawn was one of the Three.

00:45:21.675 --> 00:45:23.275
No, not three.

00:45:23.275 --> 00:45:25.590
It was Live Free or Die Hard.

00:45:25.590 --> 00:45:32.215
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yes, right, yeah, yeah, farallon was where they had all the control of the gas and everything.

00:45:32.215 --> 00:45:34.398
It wasn't Shia LaBeouf, was it?

00:45:34.398 --> 00:45:36.719
No, who was the kid that was in that?

00:45:36.719 --> 00:45:37.800
Oh, what's his name?

00:45:37.800 --> 00:45:43.525
From Long Right, he's funny as hell.

00:45:43.525 --> 00:45:44.826
He's in fucking hilarious movies.

00:45:44.826 --> 00:45:46.188
I hate him.

00:45:46.188 --> 00:45:47.992
He's funny as shit.

00:45:47.992 --> 00:45:48.253
He's a dildo.

00:45:48.253 --> 00:45:57.697
But Fairlawn is actually a big hub that controls the electronics and the grids.

00:45:57.697 --> 00:46:00.637
I believe that's one of the main ones.

00:46:00.637 --> 00:46:03.655
If anything ever happened to it, that the whole East Coast would be out.

00:46:03.655 --> 00:46:06.197
So maybe that's why drones were in Jersey.

00:46:06.197 --> 00:46:11.670
Now things are starting to connect.

00:46:11.769 --> 00:46:19.695
It's going to be like 9-11 again, I'm going to have to sneak home over to Things are just starting to connect Bear Mountain Bridge, so what's going to you heard it here first, people.

00:46:19.695 --> 00:46:20.958
I'm telling you right now.

00:46:20.958 --> 00:46:25.000
Well, no one heard it live and we're probably not going to put this out.

00:46:25.000 --> 00:46:34.577
So Breaking news, this out so breaking news.

00:46:34.577 --> 00:46:48.177
It's been a few months since I've edited some episodes and put them on in Buzzsprout, so I will be a better friend in person and I will do that tomorrow because I am not doing anything.

00:46:48.177 --> 00:46:52.661
Do you want to release four in one day?

00:46:52.661 --> 00:46:55.186
That'd be awesome, person, and I will do that tomorrow because I am not doing anything.

00:46:55.186 --> 00:46:55.989
Do you want to release four in one day?

00:46:55.989 --> 00:46:56.349
That'd be awesome.

00:46:56.349 --> 00:46:57.539
Alright, we can do that, alright.

00:46:57.539 --> 00:46:57.882
Do you need help?

00:46:57.882 --> 00:47:00.356
Nah, it's so bad because it takes like 15 minutes each thing.

00:47:00.356 --> 00:47:02.195
I just gotta edit real quick and boom, boom, boom.

00:47:02.195 --> 00:47:05.773
Okay, and I gotta do better in that situation.

00:47:05.773 --> 00:47:06.617
So I admit my wrongs.

00:47:06.617 --> 00:47:08.434
I'm much better at this.

00:47:08.434 --> 00:47:10.873
I'm such a.

00:47:10.873 --> 00:47:11.356
I'm clear.

00:47:11.356 --> 00:47:12.125
It's the gospel music dude.

00:47:12.164 --> 00:47:14.096
You're not much better, but you're getting better.

00:47:14.135 --> 00:47:14.376
Kevin.

00:47:14.376 --> 00:47:15.974
He's better than some people.

00:47:15.974 --> 00:47:18.034
I may not be much better, but I am fully better.

00:47:19.539 --> 00:47:25.422
So getting better this fucking guy.

00:47:26.190 --> 00:47:30.880
Silent Rage is a little tickle Silent Rage.

00:47:30.880 --> 00:47:31.702
Was it Chuck Norris Rage?

00:47:31.702 --> 00:47:32.224
This fucking guy?

00:47:32.224 --> 00:47:33.947
It's a silent rages, sounds like a little tickle Silent rage.

00:47:33.947 --> 00:47:34.710
What does Chuck Norris move Rage?

00:47:34.710 --> 00:47:36.014
I just want to kill somebody.

00:47:36.014 --> 00:47:36.396
I really do.

00:47:36.396 --> 00:47:40.081
Hopefully the apocalypse does happen so I can get it out of the way and just get it out of my system.

00:47:40.081 --> 00:47:42.135
Johnny Pico, what's going on, buddy?

00:47:42.135 --> 00:47:42.856
We missed you.

00:47:42.856 --> 00:47:46.675
Hey, johnny, quick question for you, fella.

00:47:46.675 --> 00:47:48.302
Quick question for you, fella.

00:47:48.302 --> 00:48:07.956
Have you heard or do you know of anything about a possible terrorist threat?

00:48:07.996 --> 00:48:11.166
either January 19th and or 20th by the Al-Qaeda with undetectable suicide bombing vests.

00:48:11.186 --> 00:48:12.130
Very detailed, right, quite specific.

00:48:12.130 --> 00:48:16.027
I'm asking him and Facebook's probably monitoring, but if he gets an answer, we're fucking good.

00:48:17.510 --> 00:48:21.474
Don't answer, Johnny Don't answer Fact checkers.

00:48:21.514 --> 00:48:27.291
Fact checkers Blink twice if you hear me, johnny, safe word is snorkel.

00:48:27.291 --> 00:48:32.952
Just remember that We'll be there, we'll get you.

00:48:32.952 --> 00:48:33.760
Kevin's got built up rage.

00:48:33.760 --> 00:48:34.809
I know we'll get to you.

00:48:34.809 --> 00:48:36.951
We will get in the car right now.

00:48:36.951 --> 00:48:44.177
We'll be at Wisconsin in two days and he'll murder a fucking cow on the way and chop it and leave it in the fucking back and let it rot.

00:48:44.769 --> 00:48:46.755
No, no, dude, I'll take those snakes man.

00:48:46.954 --> 00:48:49.119
No, that's how you get through those Muslims.

00:48:49.119 --> 00:48:50.603
They don't like that cow blood shit.

00:48:50.603 --> 00:48:56.356
First of all, I got proof the turkey, he's not taking care of the cow after it's dead.

00:48:56.356 --> 00:48:58.817
No, no, the cow will be put in the fridge.

00:48:58.817 --> 00:49:00.876
I thought it was going to stay cold the whole two years.

00:49:00.876 --> 00:49:03.934
I've had this cow in here for two years.

00:49:03.934 --> 00:49:04.958
You think the meat's still good?

00:49:04.958 --> 00:49:09.929
It was smoked, dude.

00:49:09.929 --> 00:49:12.259
That was his reasoning to say eat a piece of that, turkey.

00:49:12.259 --> 00:49:13.936
It was smoked.

00:49:13.936 --> 00:49:15.273
Did it have hair on it?

00:49:15.273 --> 00:49:25.036
Speaking of oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, hold up, wait, wait, wait.

00:49:25.036 --> 00:49:26.811
Do we have to get the wheel?

00:49:26.811 --> 00:49:28.735
I don't know.

00:49:28.735 --> 00:49:29.177
I'll get the wheel.

00:49:29.177 --> 00:49:29.557
I don't know.

00:49:29.557 --> 00:49:30.099
I think we should.

00:49:30.099 --> 00:49:32.143
I'll get the wheel, I'll get the wheel.

00:49:32.282 --> 00:49:32.664
I'll get it.

00:49:32.664 --> 00:49:38.695
Honestly, I feel like you're going to take the brunt of this right now.

00:49:38.695 --> 00:49:39.295
Why?

00:49:39.599 --> 00:49:40.250
Because you've been.

00:49:40.250 --> 00:49:41.916
I have nothing to prove.

00:49:42.920 --> 00:49:52.336
You have nothing to offer as well, and I feel like you should take the brunt of.

00:49:59.922 --> 00:50:06.280
I'm getting the brunt of this and I'm not fucking offering anything, okay so, hear me out.

00:50:07.972 --> 00:50:15.182
I feel that you were the one who didn't.

00:50:15.182 --> 00:50:22.463
We didn't want participate shut up, bitch.

00:50:23.030 --> 00:50:30.748
Instead you gotta put, you're gonna have to put this back there.

00:50:31.210 --> 00:50:32.155
Yeah, just give it to me.

00:50:32.155 --> 00:50:36.893
No, I don't think we need the wheel right now, dude, I think.

00:50:46.211 --> 00:50:46.653
Watch your head.

00:50:47.932 --> 00:50:48.896
Yeah, spin it.

00:50:51.431 --> 00:50:53.938
Thanks, captain, captain, fucking guy.

00:50:57.907 --> 00:51:01.360
Like really, man, you're shitting on me right now, bro.

00:51:02.137 --> 00:51:03.170
I'm not shitting on anyone.

00:51:03.851 --> 00:51:07.653
I'm just saying, like being the one that didn't Participate in this particular Event.

00:51:07.653 --> 00:51:09.914
We're going to spin the wheel and then we're going to do what we got to do, like being the one that didn't participate in this particular event.

00:51:09.914 --> 00:51:13.963
We're going to spin the wheel and then we're going to do what we got to do.

00:51:13.963 --> 00:51:20.500
I think green, purple, yellow and blue are orbs.

00:51:21.751 --> 00:51:27.576
Green, purple, yellow is orbs, red is Pat.

00:51:27.576 --> 00:51:31.592
He just gets one Like.

00:51:31.592 --> 00:51:35.976
The guy that didn't like participate in this gets one color.

00:51:36.751 --> 00:51:38.155
Sounds like the four years with you.

00:51:39.139 --> 00:51:39.800
Hello.

00:51:41.492 --> 00:51:48.233
Right, like I feel like we get one color and he gets the rest.

00:51:48.233 --> 00:51:49.117
Man, what's?

00:51:49.137 --> 00:51:49.458
the matter, pat.

00:51:49.458 --> 00:51:50.842
What are you looking for?

00:51:50.842 --> 00:51:52.731
Now?

00:51:52.731 --> 00:51:54.496
You have two extra, just for that comment.

00:51:54.496 --> 00:51:57.061
Just for that.

00:51:57.590 --> 00:51:59.518
Like he's got nothing.

00:51:59.518 --> 00:52:02.789
He's got nothing to fucking bring to this moment.

00:52:02.789 --> 00:52:05.074
Do you recall when he peeled?

00:52:05.135 --> 00:52:06.958
his face off with the pot peppers.

00:52:06.958 --> 00:52:10.438
No, you don't remember that.

00:52:11.184 --> 00:52:11.849
Yeah, and.

00:52:12.351 --> 00:52:12.793
Do you remember the?

00:52:12.833 --> 00:52:13.516
cherry I ate.

00:52:13.516 --> 00:52:16.920
Like hashtag, yeah, and and.

00:52:18.201 --> 00:52:19.228
Do you remember the cherry I ate?

00:52:20.376 --> 00:52:21.766
Do you remember the stroke I had?

00:52:21.847 --> 00:52:23.896
after eating those fucking jelly beans.

00:52:23.896 --> 00:52:29.016
Yeah, like hashtag yeah and Hashtag Shut up, bitch.

00:52:29.016 --> 00:52:31.496
That shit was funny when I stroked out.

00:52:31.496 --> 00:52:34.760
There's still times I think about it.

00:52:34.951 --> 00:52:36.802
I wasn't there for that, by the way.

00:52:36.802 --> 00:52:37.849
Just saying.

00:52:39.434 --> 00:52:40.478
That was Tommy O and Mikey.

00:52:41.601 --> 00:52:42.130
Like honestly.

00:52:44.277 --> 00:52:47.539
Tommy had the best Comment the whole time as I'm walking out.

00:52:47.539 --> 00:52:50.072
He's like you want me to grease up some battles so close.

00:52:50.072 --> 00:52:51.880
Had the best comment the whole time as I'm walking out.

00:52:51.880 --> 00:52:59.112
He's like you want me to grease up some battles so close and I look at him like a fish and in my head I'm like you, motherfucker.

00:52:59.112 --> 00:53:14.552
You're lucky I can't say anything, and I wanted to, but doing that, I'm going to go downstairs and oh, oh God, uh-oh, there's a microphone right here Doing that I'm going to go downstairs and oh, oh, my God, uh-oh, there's a microphone, right here there's a

00:53:14.572 --> 00:53:15.360
microphone right here for you.

00:53:15.360 --> 00:53:18.096
Ladies and gentlemen, I told you we have breaking news.

00:53:18.096 --> 00:53:24.918
There is breaking fucking news For the first time ever, ever, ever, ever.

00:53:24.918 --> 00:53:28.764
I didn't even think she knew where this video was, ever, ever.

00:53:28.764 --> 00:53:33.153
I didn't even think she knew where this dirty hole was.

00:53:33.153 --> 00:53:36.338
Ladies and gentlemen, first time ever, the silent assassin.

00:53:36.338 --> 00:53:40.882
You're probably not going to see her on the screen because she's silent, but it looks like she's going to kill somebody.

00:53:40.943 --> 00:53:41.724
Come on in.

00:53:42.925 --> 00:53:43.945
And I think it's Kevin.

00:53:43.945 --> 00:53:50.815
She was looking right at the frying pan too.

00:53:50.815 --> 00:53:51.577
What's she throwing, jesus?

00:53:51.577 --> 00:53:52.938
She just threw a Chinese star.

00:53:52.938 --> 00:53:54.822
You're dead, dude.

00:53:54.822 --> 00:53:56.744
You better protect yourself.

00:53:56.744 --> 00:54:01.673
Yeah, look at him now, protect your neck she's so drunk.

00:54:01.673 --> 00:54:02.436
Oh, my God.

00:54:03.311 --> 00:54:04.737
I fear for your life tonight.

00:54:05.751 --> 00:54:07.657
I'm afraid to even walk out of the studio later.

00:54:07.657 --> 00:54:12.277
You're thinking butt sex yeah, she's going gonna suffocate you Some way somehow.

00:54:12.277 --> 00:54:16.226
No, no, no, not her receiving, she's going to be giving.

00:54:16.226 --> 00:54:23.777
Yeah, kevin, butt sex, bjorn style, it's French.

00:54:25.414 --> 00:54:25.815
Oh my god.

00:54:28.293 --> 00:54:30.255
This is oh boy.

00:54:30.255 --> 00:54:31.315
You know the fact that.

00:54:31.315 --> 00:54:35.269
Well, at least we know how the terrorists are gonna be fucking, how they're gonna be tortured.

00:54:35.269 --> 00:54:38.059
Definitely on the Bjorn ranch.

00:54:38.059 --> 00:54:40.217
You took what up there.

00:54:40.217 --> 00:54:42.099
There's a fist and a KY jelly.

00:54:42.099 --> 00:54:43.597
What do you mean?

00:54:43.597 --> 00:54:45.476
She's saying there's room for more.

00:54:46.438 --> 00:54:46.619
What?

00:54:46.619 --> 00:54:49.358
How far can you go?

00:54:49.358 --> 00:54:49.900
Room for more?

00:54:49.900 --> 00:54:51.085
What, how far can you?

00:54:51.768 --> 00:54:51.829
go.

00:54:51.829 --> 00:54:54.858
I think he's asking you to get up to the elbow.

00:54:57.610 --> 00:54:59.800
Like what a fucking monkey you are.

00:55:01.956 --> 00:55:05.172
You're right, you're going to put that up there and you're going to hold that for me.

00:55:05.172 --> 00:55:06.637
That's what you're going to do.

00:55:06.637 --> 00:55:08.355
Alright, we're in the fucking apocalypse.

00:55:08.355 --> 00:55:09.197
You're going to keep it warm.

00:55:09.197 --> 00:55:12.250
Put that in your prison wallet.

00:55:12.250 --> 00:55:17.496
I said Beirut, you prison wallet.

00:55:17.949 --> 00:55:23.356
I said Beirut, beirut, banana.

00:55:23.577 --> 00:55:28.704
Kevin Seifert you know it's therapy Banana Snorkel.

00:55:28.704 --> 00:55:39.376
Snorkel Get over here, oh, now we get smoked down here, because I think he's scared right now.

00:55:39.376 --> 00:55:46.161
To be honest with you, he's having his last cigarette, just like somebody does before they're over there at the shooting fucking squad.

00:55:46.161 --> 00:55:48.097
He doesn't even know what's going on right now.

00:55:49.193 --> 00:55:49.996
We're pulling out the.

00:55:49.996 --> 00:55:52.056
Yeah, unfortunately you're coming.

00:55:52.056 --> 00:55:53.793
Dude, I'm not scared.

00:55:53.793 --> 00:55:55.960
I'm not scared.

00:55:55.960 --> 00:55:57.775
I think there's some fear in there.

00:55:57.775 --> 00:56:00.940
Maybe you get a fear boner during that whole time.

00:56:00.940 --> 00:56:01.291
Yeah, I know.

00:56:01.291 --> 00:56:05.697
When she gets highly aggressive, hey, pat, when she gets highly aggressive, you know it's going to be good.

00:56:05.697 --> 00:56:06.980
Wow, it's going to get freaky.

00:56:06.980 --> 00:56:11.204
You're like a fear boner because you're scared for your life, but you're horny at the same time.

00:56:11.204 --> 00:56:11.786
Do you get one of those?

00:56:11.786 --> 00:56:24.195
Hey, pat, no, can I get the over under on a pee in the closet tonight, because she's probably going to have him bound and tied, hang in there like a piece of meat.

00:56:24.195 --> 00:56:26.119
Oh, you like to smoke meat, do you?

00:56:26.119 --> 00:56:27.360
There's going to be a story.

00:56:27.360 --> 00:56:29.143
You like to use that smoker.

00:56:29.143 --> 00:56:31.425
I'm not sure what the story's going to be.

00:56:31.425 --> 00:56:33.076
You're my little piggy.

00:56:33.076 --> 00:56:33.878
Fuck you, man.

00:56:33.878 --> 00:56:36.313
You are my little piggy and I'm going to hang you from the closet.

00:56:38.597 --> 00:56:39.159
Fuck you.

00:56:41.744 --> 00:56:42.385
Say my name bitch.

00:56:48.498 --> 00:56:49.521
It's fucking two to one.

00:56:49.682 --> 00:56:56.356
If we can get him through the rest of that ball at Woodford, I want the odds on his shit in the litter box With the cat.

00:56:56.356 --> 00:56:59.878
At the same time You're gonna squat with the cat.

00:56:59.878 --> 00:57:00.572
What's up agent?

00:57:01.155 --> 00:57:01.536
Move over.

00:57:03.456 --> 00:57:15.746
Gunner's sitting there like he's only laughing and throwing in your finger like that, because he knows it's all true, it can happen.

00:57:15.746 --> 00:57:16.369
It totally can happen.

00:57:16.369 --> 00:57:20.135
How funny would it be if, up in the morning, the silent comes down.

00:57:20.135 --> 00:57:22.416
You want to hear a great story?

00:57:22.416 --> 00:57:29.655
Kevin shit in the litter box last night I'm going to get the text at 7am and he fell asleep with the cat on the side.

00:57:29.655 --> 00:57:33.586
I actually shit in the litter box last night I'm going to get the text at 7 am and he fell asleep with the cat on the side.

00:57:33.586 --> 00:57:34.530
I actually shit in the litter box, kevin shit.

00:57:34.530 --> 00:57:37.077
No, I think Matty went up there and did it on purpose.

00:57:37.077 --> 00:57:40.436
It looks like a farbman shit.

00:57:40.436 --> 00:57:42.556
I don't know, it's a little loose right now.

00:57:42.556 --> 00:57:45.411
You don't want me to do that in an open litter box no number one.

00:57:46.552 --> 00:57:48.434
I'm not shitting in a litter box.

00:57:49.456 --> 00:57:50.878
But you heard it here first people.

00:57:50.998 --> 00:57:51.798
But it's in your head.

00:57:52.079 --> 00:57:52.639
It's in your head.

00:57:52.679 --> 00:57:55.043
Kevin says it's never going to happen to him shitting in a litter box.

00:57:55.043 --> 00:57:56.405
When he's pissed, it's in your head.

00:57:56.405 --> 00:57:57.346
He's pissed on his dogs.

00:57:57.346 --> 00:58:03.742
He's pissed on the dog bed, random corners, drawers, on my dogs, on his dogs.

00:58:03.742 --> 00:58:04.282
What?

00:58:04.282 --> 00:58:04.844
We're making it better.

00:58:04.844 --> 00:58:12.213
We're making the story better.

00:58:12.213 --> 00:58:14.864
Will you black out later or are you going to have a drunk or a shit in a litter box?

00:58:14.864 --> 00:58:19.653
I'm going to shit in a litter box now as the silent one ties you up.

00:58:19.653 --> 00:58:20.938
She's like I'm going to have Gunner, fuck you.

00:58:20.938 --> 00:58:24.793
Oh, you're getting raped by Gunner tonight.

00:58:24.793 --> 00:58:27.072
That's the fucking telltale.

00:58:27.072 --> 00:58:28.898
End of it.

00:58:28.938 --> 00:58:31.297
It's when Gunner takes you over.

00:58:31.297 --> 00:58:41.905
He's submissive to the doll.

00:58:41.905 --> 00:58:43.389
Gunner does not like happiness.

00:58:43.389 --> 00:58:48.521
You can't laugh.

00:58:48.521 --> 00:58:50.608
You're gonna take this, you're gonna take this, you're gonna take this.

00:58:50.608 --> 00:58:51.730
You're gonna take this owner.

00:58:55.759 --> 00:58:57.083
Honestly, I got nothing.

00:58:57.083 --> 00:59:03.016
Alright, give me a second here Like holy fuck man.

00:59:03.016 --> 00:59:04.067
So you wanna tell the story?

00:59:04.550 --> 00:59:06.237
You wanna tell the story About what we're doing?

00:59:06.237 --> 00:59:10.521
Yeah, I'll put your Earphones back on and tell the story about what we're doing.

00:59:10.521 --> 00:59:14.177
Get off, put your earphones back on and tell the story of the new bit that we have for the.

00:59:14.177 --> 00:59:14.900
Take a Deep Show.

00:59:14.900 --> 00:59:16.393
What's your new safe word?

00:59:16.393 --> 00:59:18.260
Fidelio?

00:59:21.590 --> 00:59:24.500
You never have a new safe word, just in case.

00:59:26.210 --> 00:59:27.777
Oh no, it's happening again.

00:59:27.777 --> 00:59:30.989
Fuck, I forgot to save for her.

00:59:30.989 --> 00:59:32.416
Alright, she didn't hear Beirut last time.

00:59:34.784 --> 00:59:35.309
Strawberry.

00:59:37.514 --> 00:59:38.378
Where's my lighter?

00:59:38.378 --> 00:59:39.961
You threw it on the table.

00:59:39.961 --> 00:59:41.550
I found my cigarette.

00:59:41.652 --> 00:59:42.829
It's right there actually.

00:59:44.054 --> 00:59:44.356
Oh sweet.

00:59:45.673 --> 00:59:49.898
Alright, so you want to tell everyone a new bit that we're going to do every week on the Take a Deep Show.

00:59:50.112 --> 00:59:52.110
Okay, so we're doing a little gas station.

00:59:52.150 --> 00:59:54.438
We're going to be so consistent with it, just like we are with the show.

00:59:55.373 --> 00:59:57.692
I think we should be with this one man.

00:59:57.692 --> 00:59:58.836
It's kind of fun.

00:59:58.836 --> 01:00:01.829
We're doing gas station food roulette.

01:00:01.829 --> 01:00:08.128
Right Like chat roulette, no Like.

01:00:09.916 --> 01:00:10.496
Roulette.

01:00:10.496 --> 01:00:21.900
Okay, and explain those terms that I forgot and I I apologize well, someone has to purchase a gas station food item, right?

01:00:22.963 --> 01:00:32.659
and not just like a beef jerky stick, like well, no, it could be anything really Right Like it could be, like I mean, I went to the first gas station.

01:00:32.759 --> 01:00:34.561
All I had really left was like donuts.

01:00:34.561 --> 01:00:35.983
I'm like I'm not getting a donut.

01:00:35.983 --> 01:00:37.744
Check that, uh that.

01:00:37.744 --> 01:00:39.065
For what do you need a pen?

01:00:39.065 --> 01:00:39.545
Black one?

01:00:40.351 --> 01:00:46.782
Yeah, well, over there like it could even be like a bag of chips, right?

01:00:47.610 --> 01:00:49.153
No Cause you want to make, it's got to be.

01:00:49.153 --> 01:00:50.418
Well, it could be.

01:00:51.561 --> 01:00:56.541
But it could be other stuff as well, like sushi.

01:00:57.346 --> 01:01:00.679
First of all, whoever buys sushi at a gas station is an asshole.

01:01:01.231 --> 01:01:02.313
We've all seen that.

01:01:02.414 --> 01:01:06.617
Right, that's why I said whoever buys sushi at a gas station is an asshole.

01:01:06.617 --> 01:01:07.519
They're looking for trouble.

01:01:08.130 --> 01:01:09.516
Well, that's the.

01:01:10.170 --> 01:01:12.539
As long as the wheel doesn't land on them.

01:01:12.869 --> 01:01:16.119
Like it's the kind of fun of this game.

01:01:16.119 --> 01:01:24.536
Right, like it could be sushi, right it could be, but someone.

01:01:28.481 --> 01:01:30.230
All right, so we have two items tonight.

01:01:30.230 --> 01:01:31.275
It's not the end of the world.

01:01:31.275 --> 01:01:33.157
Cut one in half.

01:01:37.757 --> 01:01:40.923
So how do we do the wheel Then?

01:01:40.923 --> 01:01:43.429
Right.

01:01:45.838 --> 01:01:47.003
Is this, kevin, I'm talking to right now.

01:01:47.003 --> 01:01:49.980
I'm putting my name up on the board.

01:01:50.431 --> 01:01:51.132
Yeah, what are you doing?

01:01:51.253 --> 01:01:55.815
Oh, okay, all right, okay, this guy, this guy, You're very like you know.

01:01:58.170 --> 01:02:02.400
And for you to even say that I wouldn't participate in this.

01:02:02.400 --> 01:02:05.572
Well, it's a punch in the dick right there.

01:02:06.034 --> 01:02:06.894
Is it Because?

01:02:07.376 --> 01:02:08.918
It was a dick punch.

01:02:08.918 --> 01:02:12.864
Explain the time you've ever sacrificed anything of you or your body for this show.

01:02:13.164 --> 01:02:14.065
Well, I mean currently.

01:02:14.065 --> 01:02:16.971
Oh boy, currently what?

01:02:16.971 --> 01:02:21.974
Currently you've done nothing for this bit.

01:02:21.974 --> 01:02:42.327
But Okay, I'm just saying, man, you know.

01:02:44.657 --> 01:02:45.940
Ladies and gentlemen, we're going to take a break.

01:02:45.940 --> 01:02:54.954
Matt just left the studio and, yeah, we're just going to chill out here real quick, so where'd he go?

01:02:55.434 --> 01:02:56.297
He's got to pee.

01:02:56.297 --> 01:03:00.608
He's totally peeing right now.

01:03:00.608 --> 01:03:02.356
I don't ever see him pee.

01:03:02.356 --> 01:03:03.434
No, he's totally peeing.

01:03:03.931 --> 01:03:04.755
I got the lighter fluid.

01:03:04.755 --> 01:03:05.617
I'm just going to set myself up.

01:03:05.617 --> 01:03:09.733
And what are you going to keep on saying?

01:03:09.733 --> 01:03:10.896
Ukraine is what.

01:03:12.920 --> 01:03:14.103
Viva Ukraine.

01:03:18.492 --> 01:03:19.516
What's the matter with you?

01:03:20.170 --> 01:03:21.195
I don't know man dude.

01:03:24.090 --> 01:03:26.478
I love making fun of Pat, but you're out of order, unreal.

01:03:26.518 --> 01:03:29.610
I'm just going to gas myself in that lighter fluid in front of Pat, but you're out of order, unreal.

01:03:30.570 --> 01:03:32.597
I'm just going to gas myself in that lighter fluid.

01:03:32.597 --> 01:03:35.594
You want me to participate.

01:03:35.594 --> 01:03:36.655
You want me to drink lighter fluid.

01:03:36.655 --> 01:03:38.079
What do you want me to do, Kev.

01:03:39.663 --> 01:03:43.833
Well at this moment you're not doing anything.

01:03:46.400 --> 01:03:47.802
Okay, of course not, I'm not.

01:03:47.989 --> 01:03:52.998
I mean, I don't know what you're putting up there, but I think it should be like Matt Pat Kev Kev Kev.

01:03:52.998 --> 01:03:55.275
Pat Matt Kev Kev Kev.

01:03:58.097 --> 01:03:58.519
It's fine.

01:04:00.516 --> 01:04:01.157
Yeah, you're hungry.

01:04:01.157 --> 01:04:02.280
Anyway, you didn't eat a lot today.

01:04:02.280 --> 01:04:09.050
You see why he's hungry.

01:04:09.050 --> 01:04:14.260
He's not fed ever, no Well, if he doesn't cook a five star meal.

01:04:14.260 --> 01:04:22.123
First of all, when the silent assassin Opens up the studio door for the first time ever and she gives the ever Across the throat motion.

01:04:22.123 --> 01:04:23.916
She did that.

01:04:25.320 --> 01:04:25.985
That's why I said it.

01:04:25.985 --> 01:04:26.628
Did you not see that?

01:04:29.175 --> 01:04:32.320
And then she threw like a fucking Chinese star at you, oh shit.

01:04:33.903 --> 01:04:36.197
So, I thought you were saying it for a gauntlet, yeah.

01:04:36.510 --> 01:04:37.775
I understand where your fear comes from.

01:04:37.775 --> 01:04:38.117
I get it.

01:04:38.117 --> 01:04:51.833
And she limited his intake of food today, so he wasn't allowed too.

01:04:51.833 --> 01:04:52.494
This is a good game for us.

01:04:52.494 --> 01:04:53.376
It's all about the bourbon today.

01:04:53.376 --> 01:04:54.177
We're friends, we'll give you food.

01:04:54.177 --> 01:04:55.141
I would have brought you food.

01:04:55.141 --> 01:04:55.742
We do understand the rage too.

01:04:55.742 --> 01:04:56.182
I get it.

01:04:56.182 --> 01:04:59.931
You're locked up in a cage, no release.

01:05:00.713 --> 01:05:01.974
Right, I was fired up.

01:05:01.974 --> 01:05:06.023
Man, I'm sure you're fired up to release man, you and me both.

01:05:08.291 --> 01:05:14.242
You ever see a scary movie, let's go jerk off in public, or something Might as well.

01:05:14.242 --> 01:05:15.856
Right, get a thrill out of that.

01:05:15.856 --> 01:05:17.255
What's wrong with that?

01:05:27.623 --> 01:05:27.945
What's you?

01:05:27.965 --> 01:05:33.851
writing there Putting our names on the wheel to see who who wins gas station roulette.

01:05:33.851 --> 01:05:44.581
All right, so, uh, I have one, two, three, four, four pies.

01:05:44.581 --> 01:05:50.827
Matt, you have 1, 2, 3, 4.

01:05:50.827 --> 01:05:57.719
Kevin, you have 1, 2, 3, 4 and 5.

01:06:00.940 --> 01:06:02.505
Why do you not have 5?

01:06:03.108 --> 01:06:07.719
I think that's because of your comments and I had the marker.

01:06:07.719 --> 01:06:08.976
It's very simple to make that decision, Matthew.

01:06:08.976 --> 01:06:09.197
I'd marker.

01:06:09.197 --> 01:06:10.585
I mean very simple to make that decision.

01:06:10.585 --> 01:06:16.757
Matthew, I'd like to hear what you were saying, I can rewind the tape and just have him repeat what he just said.

01:06:16.757 --> 01:06:19.255
I think it's fair, thank you, what?

01:06:21.900 --> 01:06:22.822
Okay, did you see that?

01:06:26.371 --> 01:06:27.856
Like fuck off man.

01:06:27.956 --> 01:06:36.246
Kev, kev, alright, hey, bud, like, hey, like, go ahead, we're done, bro, alright, that's where you're gonna.

01:06:37.050 --> 01:06:49.077
no, no, we gotta hang a shelf, go ahead spin the wheel, bro alright so what is the selection on hand?

01:06:49.269 --> 01:06:52.320
I think spin the wheel first and then we'll we already know.

01:06:52.320 --> 01:06:53.333
This is how I'm going to know.

01:06:53.333 --> 01:06:54.536
The curse is still on me.

01:06:54.536 --> 01:06:57.612
All right, can you take out Kev?

01:06:57.612 --> 01:06:58.976
Could you take out the food items?

01:07:00.771 --> 01:07:02.798
I cannot, till the wheel is spun.

01:07:03.809 --> 01:07:04.972
I didn't know, you made up the rules.

01:07:04.972 --> 01:07:07.556
All right, I got to spin the wheel.

01:07:07.556 --> 01:07:08.398
Well, how's this working?

01:07:08.398 --> 01:07:09.280
Then we spin the wheel.

01:07:09.280 --> 01:07:11.864
Well, how's this working?

01:07:11.864 --> 01:07:13.668
Then we spin the wheel and do what, hey KX.

01:07:13.668 --> 01:07:20.246
Well, once we determine who's going to be sampling the gas station food items, then Kev can do an unveiling.

01:07:20.246 --> 01:07:22.353
He gets, oh okay, and then the person has to select.

01:07:22.534 --> 01:07:26.472
Yeah Right, no, no, no, the person does not get the right.

01:07:26.472 --> 01:07:30.556
They just fucking do Eat.

01:07:30.717 --> 01:07:33.641
All of it, so spin it man.

01:07:33.681 --> 01:07:34.081
Spin it.

01:07:34.081 --> 01:07:37.525
Once again, this is another thing that's not followed through on.

01:07:37.525 --> 01:07:39.266
Didn't finish it.

01:07:40.411 --> 01:07:43.153
It's great man, it's fucking great.

01:07:43.474 --> 01:07:46.833
Take a deep show, typical Round and round.

01:07:46.833 --> 01:07:53.219
We go hey KX, hey Kappa, and it's gonna land on me.

01:07:53.219 --> 01:07:54.876
I knew it.

01:07:54.876 --> 01:08:01.639
So I have to say a prayer to the flowers after the show.

01:08:01.639 --> 01:08:07.518
I mean, come on, come, the fuck on people.

01:08:09.197 --> 01:08:10.594
So Best two out of three.

01:08:11.335 --> 01:08:12.940
Ladies and gentlemen, if you don't know.

01:08:12.940 --> 01:08:14.938
So what does that mean?

01:08:14.938 --> 01:08:17.185
You tell me you're the one who made up the game Pat.

01:08:17.185 --> 01:08:30.800
Now has to sample the gas station food items, both or one, I mean, that's a little, he doesn't have to eat everything.

01:08:30.819 --> 01:08:33.976
Wait, there's two of them, here we go here we go, here we go.

01:08:34.815 --> 01:08:35.520
There's two of them.

01:08:35.520 --> 01:08:38.356
Cut that in half, and can you do the other stuff in half or no?

01:08:38.356 --> 01:08:41.873
I feel like we have a, can you do the other stuff in half or no?

01:08:43.939 --> 01:08:44.601
Answer the question.

01:08:44.601 --> 01:09:11.836
We can do both, but I feel like Pat like spun it and he, you know now he has to spin to feel like what, or you need to stop talking right, yeah so now that we have a Right, I do.

01:09:11.836 --> 01:09:21.225
I feel like you have to spin to do what, whoever brought whatever.

01:09:22.591 --> 01:09:24.420
What the fuck are you saying?

01:09:24.420 --> 01:09:26.515
What are you saying?

01:09:26.515 --> 01:09:29.734
Oh fuck man, what's his name girl?

01:09:29.734 --> 01:09:30.377
Oh yeah, down at the schoolhouse.

01:09:30.377 --> 01:09:31.139
Oh fuck man, what's his name girl?

01:09:31.139 --> 01:09:32.242
Oh yeah, down at the schoolhouse.

01:09:32.242 --> 01:09:33.505
Okay, lassie.

01:09:34.346 --> 01:09:34.667
What else?

01:09:34.667 --> 01:09:38.019
Okay, so you're going to do whatever.

01:09:38.270 --> 01:09:39.335
Mrs Smith up the street.

01:09:39.750 --> 01:09:43.400
Now you have to spin to do whatever you're going to do.

01:09:45.326 --> 01:09:47.051
What, what, the fuck is that?

01:09:47.051 --> 01:09:48.113
What are you talking about?

01:09:48.435 --> 01:09:51.710
We spun so now I gotta erase this and put no.

01:09:54.085 --> 01:09:59.810
So Pat has to eat whatever he spins, like me or you.

01:10:00.867 --> 01:10:02.091
Oh, so it's whoever brought it in.

01:10:02.091 --> 01:10:03.496
I got you Right, right, right.

01:10:03.564 --> 01:10:03.826
No.

01:10:03.907 --> 01:10:04.609
I was gonna do it.

01:10:04.609 --> 01:10:06.609
No, that's ridiculous.

01:10:08.689 --> 01:10:10.708
No, because this is the good solution to it.

01:10:10.708 --> 01:10:11.671
No, that's ridiculous.

01:10:11.692 --> 01:10:12.574
I don't think it's ridiculous.

01:10:12.595 --> 01:10:14.541
No because this is the good solution to it, right?

01:10:14.541 --> 01:10:15.063
Yeah, no, not yours.

01:10:15.063 --> 01:10:15.585
Yours was a dumb idea.

01:10:15.585 --> 01:10:19.266
Spin it again, so I get to spin it Whoever it lands on.

01:10:19.266 --> 01:10:25.310
Those two people split what's on there, so it's going to be me and somebody else no, why no?

01:10:25.310 --> 01:10:28.454
So now you're really not doing anything for the moment.

01:10:29.055 --> 01:10:31.220
No, so you're going to do.

01:10:32.024 --> 01:10:35.002
How are you going to contribute what?

01:10:35.002 --> 01:10:38.631
I'm just wondering Because you're doing nothing for this one.

01:10:39.271 --> 01:10:40.493
So you're going to eat.

01:10:40.493 --> 01:10:43.878
So now we have a participant right.

01:10:44.038 --> 01:10:47.569
Oh, my God, dude, I got to get going.

01:10:47.569 --> 01:10:56.493
First of all, you're not doing that because that's not happening and we need to finish up in like seven minutes, alright, so we're going to spin this again.

01:10:57.204 --> 01:11:00.890
Yeah, so Pat's going to eat whatever With somebody else.

01:11:01.292 --> 01:11:04.469
Who it's going to get me again.

01:11:04.469 --> 01:11:06.552
You just stop that.

01:11:06.552 --> 01:11:09.219
You're an asshole and it's broken.

01:11:09.219 --> 01:11:12.569
No, it's not broken.

01:11:12.569 --> 01:11:13.051
Touch that again.

01:11:13.051 --> 01:11:15.582
We're gonna get the silent assassin down here.

01:11:15.582 --> 01:11:23.695
And, kevin, do you know what you're gonna do?

01:11:23.695 --> 01:11:29.813
Do you know why your name was even picked?

01:11:29.813 --> 01:11:31.369
Dude, you just looked like a deer in headlights.

01:11:31.369 --> 01:11:32.493
It was like a confusing question.

01:11:32.564 --> 01:11:33.609
No, no no.

01:11:34.185 --> 01:11:38.476
So now, what do we have for the treats that you and I are going to be sharing?

01:11:39.444 --> 01:11:40.810
Well, no, not you and I.

01:11:41.024 --> 01:11:43.613
No, I just spun you God, no, you no.

01:11:43.613 --> 01:11:46.425
This is you not contributing once again?

01:11:46.425 --> 01:11:47.126
No, no, here's.

01:11:47.126 --> 01:11:52.574
No, you're going to eat what Kevin brought, so pull that out.

01:11:52.574 --> 01:11:58.291
And then I spin the next person who goes Okay, well, no, because there's two items.

01:11:58.291 --> 01:11:59.836
I'm one of them.

01:11:59.836 --> 01:12:03.853
So now, you lucky fucks, it's going to be you.

01:12:06.444 --> 01:12:07.087
It's fine.

01:12:07.106 --> 01:12:08.932
I'm hungry.

01:12:08.932 --> 01:12:12.305
All right, round and round, we go's gonna land on Pat again.

01:12:12.305 --> 01:12:14.011
If it does, I'll fucking kill somebody.

01:12:14.011 --> 01:12:15.920
Hey, kevin again.

01:12:15.920 --> 01:12:20.256
Alright, we really took the moment out of that one.

01:12:21.953 --> 01:12:22.877
So Kevin's gonna eat.

01:12:22.957 --> 01:12:29.970
Kevin's gonna eat what I brought, and then, if it lands on me, kevin's gonna eat my dick.

01:12:29.970 --> 01:12:31.778
If it lands on me, kev's going to eat my dick.

01:12:31.778 --> 01:12:32.320
No, ten million.

01:12:32.320 --> 01:12:33.927
It landed on me.

01:12:33.927 --> 01:12:35.313
Buddy, eat his dick.

01:12:35.313 --> 01:12:39.336
Yeah, twist his dick, twist it.

01:12:40.118 --> 01:12:40.621
You going to do it.

01:12:43.127 --> 01:12:44.332
What food items do we have?

01:12:44.332 --> 01:12:44.654
Orbs.

01:12:45.805 --> 01:12:47.612
Grab his dick and twist it.

01:12:47.612 --> 01:12:49.962
Oh my God, this is an MMA fight, dude you twist that dick, twist his dick and twist it.

01:12:49.889 --> 01:12:49.958
Oh my god, this is an MMA fight, dude.

01:12:49.958 --> 01:12:54.351
You twist that dick, twist his dick, twist his dick.

01:12:54.351 --> 01:13:00.971
Oh my god, dick twist Alright what do we got Orbs?

01:13:04.137 --> 01:13:04.899
What's Pat eating?

01:13:06.945 --> 01:13:09.534
Pat's eating what who brought Matt?

01:13:09.534 --> 01:13:18.078
Yeah, that's eating what?

01:13:18.099 --> 01:13:18.439
who brought matt?

01:13:18.439 --> 01:13:18.921
Yeah, sorry are we.

01:13:18.921 --> 01:13:20.082
Are we not talking now?

01:13:20.082 --> 01:13:21.345
Are we not talking in the microphone?

01:13:21.726 --> 01:13:46.840
my name is jeff dude, it's fucking dark man my name is jeff jeff man, it's dark and whatever you has swole has swole.

01:13:46.840 --> 01:13:49.301
Oh, you want to see something swole?

01:13:49.301 --> 01:13:53.993
Yeah, but what's Pat eating?

01:13:53.993 --> 01:13:54.639
We don't know what you brought.

01:13:54.639 --> 01:13:57.172
Pat is eating what you brought Kevin needs to be, used.

01:13:57.265 --> 01:13:59.645
No, Pat's eating what you brought.

01:13:59.667 --> 01:14:01.913
Because, I spun you oh, okay.

01:14:01.913 --> 01:14:09.413
Ladies and gentlemen, let's thank Kevin for giving us an example of what a retard is.

01:14:12.536 --> 01:14:13.143
Because he's retarded.

01:14:13.143 --> 01:14:16.305
Fuck man, at least you're not a faggot retard.

01:14:16.305 --> 01:14:20.256
I was hoping no he is a big faggoty retard.

01:14:21.248 --> 01:14:26.095
Well, that's after the assassin gets a hold of him, she's gonna turn him into a window licker.

01:14:26.425 --> 01:14:27.851
It's gonna be like throwing a fucking hot dog down a hallway.

01:14:27.851 --> 01:14:29.198
Yeah, that's the way it's gonna sound window licker.

01:14:29.198 --> 01:14:30.663
It's going to be like throwing a fucking hot dog down the hallway.

01:14:30.724 --> 01:14:33.012
Yeah, that's the way it's going to sound.

01:14:33.012 --> 01:14:40.292
Adelie Acosta, you're going to love me, kevin, I'm the silent assassin.

01:14:40.805 --> 01:14:42.869
So I'm eating what you brought.

01:14:42.869 --> 01:14:44.592
Yes, lick my butt.

01:14:47.177 --> 01:14:47.378
What.

01:14:49.408 --> 01:14:50.485
What's going on, dude?

01:14:50.485 --> 01:14:51.408
Come on, let's get with it.

01:14:51.408 --> 01:14:52.231
Come on, bro.

01:14:52.231 --> 01:14:53.033
Seriously, I gotta go.

01:14:53.033 --> 01:14:55.088
Dude, he's got things to do.

01:14:55.088 --> 01:14:56.212
A muffin, go man.

01:14:56.212 --> 01:14:58.296
You brought a muffin, you brought a muffin.

01:14:58.296 --> 01:15:04.145
There's a reason why I stay away from those fucking things in the castle, are you, rob?

01:15:04.145 --> 01:15:05.326
Is there a date on that?

01:15:05.567 --> 01:15:07.469
I did man First of all.

01:15:07.469 --> 01:15:08.489
Well, there was, that's not bad.

01:15:08.510 --> 01:15:10.131
That's actually that's all right.

01:15:10.131 --> 01:15:14.438
Yeah, blueberry, it's kind of it's got a fucking some weight to it, dude.

01:15:14.797 --> 01:15:16.860
I mean, I would like you to throw that in a toaster oven.

01:15:18.805 --> 01:15:25.533
You got to eat the whole thing too, right, you don't have to eat the whole thing, get the fuck out of here, Dude.

01:15:25.554 --> 01:15:28.197
there's not even like a cut in half thing.

01:15:28.197 --> 01:15:30.520
Come on.

01:15:36.113 --> 01:15:42.421
Oh my God, I'm going to specify.

01:15:42.421 --> 01:15:44.300
I need some fucking liquid, god.

01:15:46.268 --> 01:15:47.470
Oh, I'm turning into paste.

01:15:47.470 --> 01:15:49.975
Pat rate, your gas station.

01:15:49.975 --> 01:15:50.636
Blueberry muffin.

01:15:52.664 --> 01:15:58.296
It's like paper mache and I can't get all the company from behind my teeth.

01:16:00.585 --> 01:16:05.157
But I can roll over the microphone.

01:16:05.157 --> 01:16:05.738
I may choke to death.

01:16:05.738 --> 01:16:10.511
Do you see Pat shooting blueberry muffin through the spot where his teeth used to be Dude?

01:16:10.532 --> 01:16:13.701
I was just not breathing for like 30 seconds right there because it was stuck in my throat.

01:16:13.701 --> 01:16:14.483
Holy shit, bro, what is it you got?

01:16:14.483 --> 01:16:17.514
Is this straight up paste?

01:16:20.864 --> 01:16:21.966
This ain't that bad.

01:16:21.966 --> 01:16:33.953
No, no, dude, honestly man, a little bit of mayo, it'd be great.

01:16:38.326 --> 01:16:41.015
Why don't you get Pat a bite on the other side, let's see what he thinks of that one.

01:16:41.015 --> 01:16:42.530
And you take a bite of the muffin.

01:16:42.530 --> 01:16:47.154
I got the muffin caught in my tooth, oh, they're so good.

01:16:47.154 --> 01:16:51.331
No, give him a bite of that.

01:16:51.331 --> 01:16:53.006
Take your bite out of the other end, is that Dude?

01:16:53.006 --> 01:16:53.951
Thank you man.

01:16:53.951 --> 01:16:54.632
Oh, you wanna do.

01:16:54.632 --> 01:16:56.210
You wanna do the lady in the tramp thing?

01:16:56.210 --> 01:16:58.811
Honestly, let's do the lady in the tramp thing.

01:16:58.811 --> 01:16:59.929
Yeah, I think you should.

01:16:59.929 --> 01:17:01.011
You get one end, I'll get the other.

01:17:01.011 --> 01:17:01.715
We'll eat to the middle.

01:17:01.715 --> 01:17:03.037
Get it.

01:17:03.037 --> 01:17:06.306
Get it At this point, at this point, no, at this point.

01:17:06.306 --> 01:17:07.729
You.

01:17:07.729 --> 01:17:08.532
You got oats on that.

01:17:08.532 --> 01:17:08.972
What is that?

01:17:08.972 --> 01:17:11.779
That's a multi-grain roll.

01:17:11.779 --> 01:17:15.533
This was made with fucking Grout.

01:17:15.533 --> 01:17:20.216
That'll work.

01:17:20.216 --> 01:17:21.309
Do you want to?

01:17:21.328 --> 01:17:22.675
get something on the wall and make it stick.

01:17:22.675 --> 01:17:23.256
Let me see that.

01:17:23.256 --> 01:17:24.524
Chew this muffin up a little bit.

01:17:24.524 --> 01:17:28.251
Rules for the apocalypse Make sure you get the muffins.

01:17:28.251 --> 01:17:33.037
If you want to build something and you want it to stick up, I'd use that shit.

01:17:33.845 --> 01:17:36.993
Like I One and a half, yeah, like.

01:17:38.791 --> 01:17:39.673
You didn't get a condiment.

01:17:39.673 --> 01:17:42.288
No, you're going to eat that shit dry.

01:17:42.288 --> 01:17:43.793
That makes it worse.

01:17:43.793 --> 01:17:45.247
So now I'm going to die again.

01:17:45.266 --> 01:17:50.078
Oh, that is sick.

01:17:50.078 --> 01:17:51.707
This is great.

01:17:52.229 --> 01:17:53.875
That is sick, that's terrible.

01:17:53.875 --> 01:17:57.668
Well, the quality is.

01:18:00.288 --> 01:18:01.391
I'm probably going to review this.

01:18:01.391 --> 01:18:03.697
What is on here?

01:18:03.697 --> 01:18:04.985
I?

01:18:05.006 --> 01:18:05.369
don't know.

01:18:05.369 --> 01:18:08.069
Is that cheese White turkey and cheddar cheese?

01:18:08.069 --> 01:18:09.533
You got jive turkey and cheddar cheese?

01:18:09.533 --> 01:18:11.730
Dude, that's not cheddar.

01:18:11.730 --> 01:18:13.712
That is the fucking single pack.

01:18:13.712 --> 01:18:17.412
Whatever cheese it is, it's government.

01:18:17.412 --> 01:18:20.110
You can tell that's crafted somewhere in a lab.

01:18:20.110 --> 01:18:22.277
Oh my God, oh my God.

01:18:22.277 --> 01:18:23.547
This is like fucking patients.

01:18:23.547 --> 01:18:26.154
Take a bigger bite.

01:18:26.154 --> 01:18:26.675
See what happens.

01:18:26.675 --> 01:18:33.810
I'm telling you right now no, no, I don't want it.

01:18:33.810 --> 01:18:35.333
It may taste good and you can't be.

01:18:35.333 --> 01:18:39.230
It turns into Uh-huh, my teeth are still coated.

01:18:39.230 --> 01:18:41.931
Dude, that just built up my tooth.

01:18:41.931 --> 01:18:45.192
I don't have that missing part anymore.

01:18:45.192 --> 01:18:49.033
It reacts differently to different chemicals.

01:18:49.033 --> 01:18:59.167
I mean, there's nothing better than those muffins that are wrapped up in the fucking cellophane, for they've been there for months and you know it.

01:18:59.167 --> 01:19:01.708
I'm going to say this what was the date on that?

01:19:01.708 --> 01:19:05.829
Last night, at two in the morning, when I was driving home, I would eat the fuck out of this muffin.

01:19:05.829 --> 01:19:10.110
Yeah, what was the date on that?

01:19:10.110 --> 01:19:12.112
There's no date, not tonight.

01:19:12.112 --> 01:19:14.228
No, there's no date on that.

01:19:14.228 --> 01:19:15.270
No, not tonight.

01:19:15.270 --> 01:19:18.618
Was there a date on there?

01:19:20.345 --> 01:19:21.250
I don't know man.

01:19:21.564 --> 01:19:23.649
You see how much he's enjoying that sandwich right now.

01:19:23.649 --> 01:19:25.470
I don't know why I went in for more.

01:19:25.470 --> 01:19:28.675
I have no idea why I went in for more bites.

01:19:28.675 --> 01:19:30.770
Fucking cheers bro.

01:19:30.944 --> 01:19:32.356
Bought that motherfucker a sandwich.

01:19:32.356 --> 01:19:33.305
Look how much he's enjoying it.

01:19:33.305 --> 01:19:34.610
Look at the smile on his face.

01:19:34.610 --> 01:19:40.021
He's like holy shit, chewing on the fake, the fakest bread ever.

01:19:40.021 --> 01:19:41.207
And I cannot wait to eat that.

01:19:41.207 --> 01:19:47.368
Mystery cheese, government cheese, that's Kraft single packs.

01:19:47.368 --> 01:19:50.997
Come on, that's not cheddar, I don't know.

01:19:50.997 --> 01:19:54.832
Listen, oh my god, this fucking bread is so bad.

01:19:54.832 --> 01:19:56.559
The package said white turkey.

01:19:56.559 --> 01:19:57.244
I got scared.

01:19:57.244 --> 01:19:58.385
I'm like what other kind of turkey is that?

01:19:58.385 --> 01:20:02.592
That's what the bread was made out of White turkey Smoked.

01:20:02.592 --> 01:20:05.213
Yeah, you can take this fucking muffin back.

01:20:05.213 --> 01:20:07.814
I like your muffin.

01:20:07.814 --> 01:20:09.853
You know what you can do.

01:20:09.853 --> 01:20:12.011
Is there a hole you need to spackle?

01:20:12.011 --> 01:20:13.846
Because?

01:20:13.926 --> 01:20:17.713
no, joke I can chew on that like the Aborigine's doing.

01:20:17.713 --> 01:20:32.734
If you took this muffin and you slammed this in a hole and you rock, you can literally sand it tomorrow and then paint it or eat it.

01:20:32.734 --> 01:20:33.756
It's repeat, fucking.

01:20:33.756 --> 01:20:34.969
It's what is.

01:20:34.969 --> 01:20:38.645
It's really made out of um I vote sanding it's porous concrete.

01:20:41.411 --> 01:20:41.992
You know that's.

01:20:41.992 --> 01:20:43.255
It's almost like a mortar mix.

01:20:43.255 --> 01:20:47.654
See, I would make a joke and I would throw this at kevin, but I'm afraid to give him a second concussion in two days.

01:20:47.654 --> 01:20:50.503
This at Kevin, but I'm afraid he'd give him a second concussion in two days.

01:20:50.503 --> 01:20:55.371
Yeah, it's a weird material, is that even on the fucking periodic table?

01:20:55.371 --> 01:21:01.710
Whatever that's made out of, I actually want to throw it against a gong, but I know no one's going to clean anything up that flies apart.

01:21:01.710 --> 01:21:02.673
No, you'll have a.

01:21:03.027 --> 01:21:06.893
There's a group of Puerto Rican mice that are around.

01:21:06.893 --> 01:21:08.251
I think they're M13.

01:21:08.251 --> 01:21:09.829
Why are they Puerto Rican?

01:21:09.829 --> 01:21:10.894
They have tattoos.

01:21:10.894 --> 01:21:12.609
No, they had a do-rag.

01:21:12.609 --> 01:21:13.552
And they carry switchblades.

01:21:13.552 --> 01:21:17.916
Oh, you've seen them when you're down here at night.

01:21:17.916 --> 01:21:20.164
We've had discussions.

01:21:20.164 --> 01:21:23.095
I'm looking for a good drug dealer Out of that crew.

01:21:25.453 --> 01:21:27.802
Take the two year old turkey out of the fridge and leave it in front of them.

01:21:27.802 --> 01:21:28.324
You guys want a treat?

01:21:28.324 --> 01:21:30.050
No, it's smoked, dude.

01:21:30.050 --> 01:21:32.010
That means it lasts a lifetime.

01:21:32.010 --> 01:21:33.253
They'll take it back.

01:21:33.253 --> 01:21:35.672
It doesn't matter if it's been there for two years.

01:21:35.672 --> 01:21:38.253
They'll take it back to their den and they'll all die.

01:21:38.253 --> 01:21:39.489
Listen, I'll open the door.

01:21:39.489 --> 01:21:40.530
It doesn't even smell.

01:21:40.530 --> 01:21:41.692
So you know it's not rotted.

01:21:42.533 --> 01:21:45.255
You big, you know what?

01:21:45.255 --> 01:21:46.516
We just came up with this.

01:21:46.516 --> 01:21:49.378
Oh, get over here, ricky, with your fucking gold tooth and your switchblade.

01:21:49.378 --> 01:21:52.162
Come here, the TID exterminators.

01:21:52.162 --> 01:21:56.555
We take two-year-old food out of the fridge and we feed it to the rats, and they die.

01:21:56.555 --> 01:21:59.007
Oh, I thought you were talking about feeding it to people.

01:21:59.007 --> 01:21:59.390
And they die.

01:21:59.390 --> 01:22:01.411
Oh, I'm fine with that too.

01:22:01.944 --> 01:22:03.631
Alright, we gotta go.

01:22:03.631 --> 01:22:06.186
We should have left 20 minutes ago.

01:22:06.186 --> 01:22:07.408
Oh my god, then we should have left 20 minutes ago.

01:22:07.408 --> 01:22:07.787
Oh my God.

01:22:07.787 --> 01:22:08.488
We've been recording this long.

01:22:08.488 --> 01:22:10.530
Jesus Christ, this show is just sucking.

01:22:10.530 --> 01:22:12.552
How long Hour and 23.

01:22:12.552 --> 01:22:15.815
Oh, we can easily chop 45 minutes off of that.

01:22:15.815 --> 01:22:17.757
No, you're going to leave all that stupid shit in there.

01:22:17.757 --> 01:22:18.738
All right, fuck it.

01:22:18.738 --> 01:22:20.841
You know, I'm sure you can.

01:22:20.841 --> 01:22:31.958
This is great the fact that you're even saying that right now.

01:22:31.958 --> 01:22:33.601
Bro, my tooth is howling since eating that fucking muffin.

01:22:33.601 --> 01:22:34.222
That muffin was awful.

01:22:34.222 --> 01:22:37.368
I think it pasted my root instantly with pure sugar cane.

01:22:37.368 --> 01:22:38.372
Where'd you get those?

01:22:38.372 --> 01:22:43.646
Somebody had a box outside, by the recycle bin.

01:22:43.646 --> 01:22:44.390
I'm not gonna lie.

01:22:44.390 --> 01:22:45.528
I had to go to three gas stations.

01:22:45.528 --> 01:22:48.431
It was at a gas station but it was in a dumpster, but where?

01:22:48.865 --> 01:22:49.649
Don't worry about where.

01:22:49.649 --> 01:22:51.989
Alright, I kind of want to know, man.

01:22:51.989 --> 01:22:53.113
You know what I want to know?

01:22:53.113 --> 01:22:56.872
Kev Forecasts rain.

01:22:56.872 --> 01:22:58.722
Well, that was earlier.

01:22:58.722 --> 01:23:00.278
That's what he's doing later tonight.

01:23:00.278 --> 01:23:02.671
That was earlier tonight too, giving you rain.

01:23:02.671 --> 01:23:06.528
Silent assassin, or how we like to call it.

01:23:06.528 --> 01:23:07.569
Kevin's going to be divulging.

01:23:07.569 --> 01:23:10.577
You're going to be divulging the silent assassin tonight.

01:23:11.618 --> 01:23:15.835
No, she's fucking sleeping, bro, oh.

01:23:16.744 --> 01:23:18.131
It's a direction you can fuck.

01:23:18.164 --> 01:23:18.768
That's what he's going to hear.

01:23:18.768 --> 01:23:19.331
When he touches her.

01:23:19.331 --> 01:23:21.393
The poor assassin's going to have divulging in her head.

01:23:21.393 --> 01:23:24.090
It's either her or Scout.

01:23:24.090 --> 01:23:24.532
One of the two.

01:23:24.532 --> 01:23:28.453
Oh, why you got to talk about Scout like that.

01:23:28.453 --> 01:23:31.152
She's a dirty whore.

01:23:31.152 --> 01:23:32.640
She takes it from everybody.

01:23:33.203 --> 01:23:35.693
Oh, giggity, giggity, giggity, giggity, let's have sex.

01:23:36.628 --> 01:23:37.171
Do that?

01:23:37.171 --> 01:23:46.372
Go into the bedroom and say that when you first walk in, strip naked I don't know, go upstairs, kick the door in, wiggle and then giggity, giggity, let's have sex.

01:23:46.372 --> 01:23:47.649
Put this on your weenus.

01:23:51.032 --> 01:23:53.958
Straight up raping, then giggity, giggity, let's have sex.

01:23:53.979 --> 01:23:55.922
Put this on your weenus Straight up raping.

01:23:55.922 --> 01:23:56.645
Hey Matt, Let the boy watch.

01:23:56.645 --> 01:23:58.751
We're going to bring Obi in.

01:24:01.284 --> 01:24:02.469
That's where we end it.

01:24:02.469 --> 01:24:06.087
I'm going to throw up from saying that Get out.

01:24:06.087 --> 01:24:10.979
Oh, my God, I got to go, I got to go, I got to go, I got to go, I got to go, I got to go, I got to go.

01:24:10.979 --> 01:24:12.969
Oh, I'm not touching anything.

01:24:12.969 --> 01:24:13.511
What are we doing?

01:24:13.511 --> 01:24:13.832
Live.

01:24:13.832 --> 01:24:17.836
Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for joining us on this bullshit, ridiculous show.

01:24:17.836 --> 01:24:25.390
Learning about Kevin's rage and how to lessen the blow, speaking of blowing you going upstairs.

01:24:25.390 --> 01:24:30.139
Don't worry, she'll blow you.

01:24:30.139 --> 01:24:31.350
Why do we got to get out of here?

01:24:31.350 --> 01:24:35.765
We don't want to know what witnesses Take it deep bitches.

01:24:43.987 --> 01:24:44.587
Take it deep ATT.